RATES OF ADVERTISING! EPUBLICAN One Squire, on, Insa, ooo insertion..! 100 On, rquare, one inch, one month. ., I JO One Square, one inch, tiiree months. . A (O One Square, one inch, one w 10 OJ 1 wo bqueres, one year I.t ml Quarter Column, on, jir,..H SMaI Half Column, on, year .. ) 00 One Column, one year 10U U0 Lecai advertistitnents ten cents per line .each insertion. Marriages and death noticee gratis. All bills loryear.y ad vertisamjuu collected quarterly Temporary advertisement, must be paid in advanoe. Job work cash on deliver. Taxmti l.OO Por Year. Ro subscriptions reoelved for a shorter period than three months. Correspondence sollolte.1 from all parti of tb country. Mo noilo. will be takea of sss&jSvsa ooaimualoiuJoDS. ' Tiie Forest Republican U published srery Wedaosday, by J. C. WENK. ClZot la Smearbtnga & Ca't Buildinj ILM BTEEET, TIOXE3TA, PA. Forest R VOL. XXX. NO. 51. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, APRIL 6. 1898. S1.00 PER ANNUM. One striking thing about the Amerl can Govdrnment when emergenciei confront it is that Ureter gets rattled. It wasn't bnilt for rattling purposes. "Norsk Kvindestemmeretsforening" is the name of the woman's suffrage sojitty of Norway. No .wonder the men are afraid to give their Norwegian eisters final rights. As an indication of the progress which American products are making in other countries oyer 8000 golf clubs have boen exported reoently from this country for use in Sootland, the home of golf. - The agricultural societies of several Ohio counties have decided to hold no fairs this fall. The cause is said to be the feoling that the race-track feature' is fast superseding the purely agricul tural part of the annual exhibitions. About the same state of affairs exists in Missouri. Fhoenix, Arizona, is said to be the cleanest city Jn the world. She has splendid streets, with asphalt side walks. No one is permitted to Bpit "upon them nnder a penalty ef $5. The City Attorney was the first person sub jected to the fine, and, to his c-edit, paid up and promised to do so no more. The French Ministry of Finance re cently instituted an inquiry to learn the amount of gold in circulation. It has ascertained that there is $300,000, 000 worth bearing the French stamp in circulation. It is claimed that this is a record amount. It is stated that tho United States has $720,000,000, Germany $680,000,000, and Great Britain and Russia $600,000,000. That beliof in lox talionis obtains strongly in New York has been dem onstrated by the latest trials for mur der. In the Borough of Brooklyn the cowboy Hinz, who shot and killed his brother-in-law, was tried and the jury disagreed, only two men favoring oon viction. In Manhattan the jnry in the caso of Pietro Barcia, tried for killing tho man who bad slain his father in Italy, also disagreed. In this case nly-two men were for aoqnittal. loung uarcia naa loiioweu rrancesoo Cassatta from Italy in pursuit of his vendetta, and was proud of having fulfilled it. Both men will have to be tried again. . The Romany band of gypsies will crown a new queen in Topeka, Kan., on the 22d of May. It will be an unusual event in the United States, and mem bers of the band from every State in the Union, and fronf foreign countries as wellwill be present at the corona tion. One thousand gypsies are ex pected at the ceremony. The young queen Vill reach her twentieth year May 22, and a law of the tribe pre scribes that a sovereign must not be crov ..ed before attaining that age. She is known as Molly Stanley, or, more properly Molly Stackovitoh, and her mother, the former queen, was Sofia Fryer, and for more than forty years reigned as the head of the Romany tribe in Austria, 'She died several years since. Father Belah Metrovitoh, of Chicago, the only Romany priest in the United States, will perform the coronation ceremony, and Miss Minnie Youngs, 'also of Chicago, a cousin of the young queen, will have the honor of placing tho crown on the head of the sovereign. The marine sentry who gave Captain Sigsbee the first report of the disaster to the Maine is worthy of mention. His task was trifling, perhaps, but he did it with an American spirit of fidel ity to his trust Amid all the excite ment, with explosions filling the air with noises that only partly drowned the shrieks of the wounded and dying men, with the ship blazing and filling with water, this marine calmly drew himself up to a salute as the com mander of the vessel stumbled against him in the dark and made the formal report of the disaster in the briefest possible terms. This gallant fellow now makes light cf his experience, saying that "any Yankee marine would do the same thing." He pays a high but not undeserved tribute to the trustworthiness of the men who go to sea in the American ships of war. The spirit that auimates him is that which enabled the American navy in 1812-15 to sweep the Atlantio and gave to the young Republio the command of tho seas and a high rank among the world's naval powers. The English papers were inclined to suggest that the disaster may have bsen dee tc negligence or lack' of discipline on board the ship,, The utter improba bility of such sf slanderous theory is indicated by' this display of good or der on the decks of the Maine in the first moments of the disaster, when all conditions were ripe for panic and demoralization. Across the land from ttrand to strand Loud ring the bugle notes. And freedom's smile, from bile to Me, Like freedom's banner floats. One song the nations ball the notes From sounding sea to sea, And answer from their thrilling throats The song of liberty! Frank "An Awkward Fix." ONFOUND it! Wherever o a n Charlotte be?" It is M. Cha p o u 1 o t who speaks, and as the words show, M. Ghapoutct is out of humor. Ordinarily M. Chapoulot is as good-tempered and easy going as one would expect iu a man of sixty, who had been like John Gilpin, iu hisday, a linen draper bold, and has in good time retired to enjoy a modest competency in repose. Your wealthy London tradesman, now, who has grown rich beneath the shadow of St. Paul's, if ho retire afc all before death or diseaso puts'Liin suddenly bors de combat, flies off to spend his fortune at Brighton or Bath, or Cheltenham anywhere rather than in the great metropolis where he has made it. But M. Chapoulot, like the true Parisian ho is, will never desert his Yille Luiniere, and has retired no further than from the bustle of the boulevards to the more peaceful Rue de la Trocadero. There he now lives with his only daughter Charlotte and an old faithful servant of the family, and it is the former whom he is at this moment im patiently awaiting. It is dinner time with tho Chapou lots, who dine at six. M. Chapoulot always begius his dinner with punctuality, but he has never begun it without Charlotte. And Charlotte comes not. Five min utes past six, and M, Chapoulot'o im patience beoomes annoyance; ton minutes, and it is even anger; a quarter past, and ho is furious. Hun ger, they say, will tame a lioa, but it will none the less ruffle the equanimity of a saint. Wherever can Charlotte be? She has gone this afternoon to take her musio lesson in the Boulevard Barbesse. She goes three times a week, and always returns in ample time for dinner. Twenty past, anger begins to give way to nervousness; five-and-twenty, it is alarm; half-past six and no Charlotte, M. Chapoulot is trembling with anxiety. Hurriedly he summons the old servant, asks for his hat and boots; he will himself go out and see whatever may have hap pened. But suddenly there wax a merry little rap at the door, and Charlotto enters. No evil can have come, for tjiere she stands in the doorway, smil ing radiantly, in all the ease and grace of la petite Porisienne. "Oh, papa I" i ButM. Chapoulot's fear gone, his impatience again usurps supremacy, and reassured about the safety of his daughter, he begins to feel anxious for the flavor of bis dinner. ' "Come to the table first. Yon can tell me while eating. I shall under stand better then." "Oh, but pap! You don't know. I have had an adventure!" "An adventure!" cxolaimedM. Cha poulot, starting from his seat and drop ping his spoon into the' soup upon which he' had already commenced. "xes, papal An adventure in the omnibus with young man!" "The omnibus with a young manl Parblen!" "But with a young man comme il fant, papa, I can assure you." "You ought to know, Charlotte, that a young man comme il faut has no ad ventures, above all in an omnibus. Whatever do you mean?" "It is very simple, papa. You need not make such a cruel face. I had for gotten my purse. That is the thing which happens often enough " "Yes, yes; especially to those who haven't got one. Goon.". "I never discovered it until the con ductor held out his hand to take my fare. What could I do? What could 1 say? I should be taken for a pauper for an adventuress, perhaps. I was crimson, I was pale, I felt that I should faint; when, happily, a young man who sat next to me gave the conductor a pieoeof silver, saying: 'Take for two.' This gentleman, seeing my embarrass ment, had kindly paid for me." "Well, miss, you have done a nice thing. Accept six sous from a stran ger! You had better have explained to the conductor, to the driver, to all the company. But people should not forget their purses I never do. And now, how will you return his money? You will never think of keeping it?" "I have his card, papa; M. Agenor Balucbet, clerk at the ministry of " But papa, without bearing another word, had snatched the piece of paste board from her hand, exclaiming: "What? This gentleman, not con tent with insolently lending his six sous, has had the impudence to force his card upon you in the bargain! Ho is a very scoundrel, your, young man oomme il font" "But, papa, I oould not return his money if I did not know bis address." M. Chapoulot has not a word to answer to this ingenious argument, but with a gesture of the intensest irrita tion throws down bis serviette upon the table. "It is written tbst I shall not dine this evening," he says to the old ser vant. "Find me a cab at once. Iam going to restore to this Agenor his six fife They answer and an echo comes From chained and troubled Isles, And roars like ocean's thflnder drums Where glad Columbia smiles- nail to our eountryl Strong she stands, Nor tear the war dram's beat; The sword of freedom in her hands, The tyrant at ber feet. L. Stanton, In the Atlanta Constitution. sous immediately, and to tell him a few truths as well." "But, papa, that will be ingratitude You must remember that this young man has aaved your daughter from nn faux pas." "Un faux past He has rather led you into one. But, silence, miss! am not going to receive lessons, above all, lessons in memory, from a silly girl who forgets her purse." M. Chaponlot has taken his hat, and looks oven more enraged than ever. The old servant comes back. "A cabman is at the do6r,but he will only agree to a single journey." 4t,"Oh, that will dot I can easily find another to return." And M. Chapoulot goes out in furi ous .haste, while Charlotte timidly confides to the sympathizing servant that she knows even more of the young man than she has dared to say. For a month past he regularly traveled in the same omnibus, and she has no ticed that he has noticed, etc., etc. Agenor, in his bachelor apartment, sits thinking over his experience of the evening, and vowing he will not wash until the morning the hand that had been touched by the dainty fingers of Charlotte when she received the card. Suddenly a sharp rap at the door, a ( v.olent opening, and a stout gentle man, out of breath, his hat upon his i .... l i - A i.. . trni. buii cuue iu uuuu, uicua.9 iu upuu his dreaming. "Monsieur!" exclaims the invader, "your conduct is scandalous. Yon are not worthy the name of a French gentleman. An honest man would never take advantage of the embarrass ment and inexperience of a young lady. To profit by the absence of a father and a purse, to offer your money and your card into the bar gain to an unprotected girl, it may be a good investment, but it is a bad action. I have brought yon your six sous again, and would have yon to know, sir, that, as for my daughter and myself, we wish to have nothing to do with you." And the stout gentleman, trembling with his vehemence, puts his hand into his pocket to get the money, when, before Agenor has time even to recover from his bewilderment, a new actor enters upon the soene. It is the cabman, all furious, with an oath upon his lips, and brandishiug his whip in a threatening manner. "Eh! yon! What do yon mean? You engage me for a single journey. I tell you I cannot stay. You even oVder me to hurry. And then you jump from my cab liko a madman, and rush in here without a word. None pf that for -me. I have only one thing to ask. Pay me my money quickly, or " And the whip goeB round again more emphatically than before. Agenor understands nothing of it. But the stout gentleman, who has searched vigorously in all his pookets, becomes suddenly pale, then red, then redder still, then crimson, then violet. Ho is silent in stnpefaotion a minute, and then, jn answer to a more vigorous demand from the cabman, "he manages to falter: "I have forgotten my purse!" "Oh, yes! I know," cries the en raged cabman, "I have seen that dodge before. " You needn't try it on with me. Come along! you shall tell. yourkta!e at the police office.". And he begins to drag away 'by the shoul ders the unfortunate Chapoulot, who is ready to fall into an apoplectio fit. But Agenor, a true providence for the family, draws from his pocket the necessary sum and dismisses the driver. "You will allow me, sir," he says to M. Chapoulot, who, all at once under standing that it is possible to forget one's purse, and that of all friends a friend in need is one indeed, can only reply with a smile: "Monsieur M. Blauchet, I believe 30 centimes for the omnibus and 1 franc 75 for the cab, that makes 41 sous I owe you. If you will be good enough to dine with me this evening we will settle our affairs at once. As an old business man, I like not out standing debts. Besides, ready reckonings always make good friends." A quarter of an hour later the ser vant puts a third plate upon the table in tho Rue de la Trocadero. A month later there is a still larger party, when tho wedding of Charlotte and Agunor is celebrated. - And M. Cha poulot will often say to those who care to hear him: "Beware of borrowing, oh! fathers of families. I made once a debt of il sous, and could only repay it with a dowry of 20,000 francs." Strand Magazine. Fireproof Curtains. Fireproof curtains are obligatory in many European theatres,and are made cither of sheet iron or asbestos, com pletely cutting off the stage from the auditorium, and minimizing the dan ger of fire as well as of the still moro destructive panic. The first fireproof curtain in Europe was installed in the Comedie Francaise by an American electric company. Philadelphia Record. THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE. STORIES THAT ARE TOLD BY 'THE FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. The Argument Always Something New A Snre Test Apotheosis or l'arfllft Hounded Similar Beyond His RimwI edge Anxious Father Identldod, Etc. I argued pro, Blie argued con; The umpire, one Dan Cupid. Bo to and fro The strife went on, For Heaven made man stupid. When logic failed Bho found a way That Eve first taught her daughter, Though I prevailed, Hue won the day She wopt. And I toolc water. The Criterion. Always Something- New. Pray "This is an age of inven tion." Gray "You bet! The old stories don't go with modern wives!" Apotheosis of Paresis. "Lots of men start out in life with no capital, but plenty of brains." "Yes; and they die young, with no brains, but plenty of capital." Chi cago Record. Sounded Similar. The Young Woman "Have yon 'A Wartime Wooing?'" Bookseller "Not exactly, but I can give you 'He Fell iu Love with His Wife.'" Indianapolis Journal. Identified. Jack "Who is that chap who is al ways sleeping about the club room in athletio costume?" Hack "Him? Why, he is one of our active members." New York Journal. A Sure Tost. Yeast "Can yon tell anything about a man by simply lookiug at his face?" Crimsonbeak "Why, certainly. I can tell whether he has whiskers or not," Yonkers Statesman. Beyond His Knowledge. "Do you really mean to stand by what you say about retiring from pub lio life?" inquired the intimate friend just before an election. "How do I know?" responded the politician. "I'm no prophet." Wash ington Star. All the Same. Brobson "It's a disputed question which have the quicker . tempers, blondes or brunettes." Craik "Is it?" Brobson "Yes; my wife has been both, and I couldn't see that it made any difference." Boston Traveler. Unpleasantly Interrupted. "Yes, sir," said the promoter, who had entered into a bragging match with' the other promoter, "we broke ground on the first of the month, and by the 15th of the next month " "You broke the stockholders," the other promoter chipped in." Cin cinnati Inquirer. ' Anxious Father. Wife (reading paper) "There is an article in here about a remarkable kidnapping." Husbamd (walking the floor with the baby) "It must have been a re markable kid. Nothing short of chlo roform would make this one do any thing, of the kind." Richmond Dis patch. A Foul Aspersion. Magistrate "The complainant has testified that you called him vile aames, chased him around the block, knocked him down and pounded him black and blue. Did he offer you any provocation?" Prisoner "Yes, Your Honor. He said I was no gentleman." New York Journal. A Suggestive Admission. "Here you've been telling me all along," said the bright-faced youug wife, "what a wonderful cook your mother was. And now your Aunt Jane has just told me that your father was a chronic dyspeptic." "Well, you see," the young husband murmured with a deep sigh, "mother learned by practicing on father," Cleveland Plain Dealer. Discouraging. "Does your papa object to m calling upon you. Miss Dolyers?" "Not in the least, Mr. Spudds." "Does your mamma?" "No." "Do your brothers?" I think not." "Then I guess I'm pretty solid." "But there is one member of the family you neglected to ask about, and who does object to your coming most heartily." "I thought I had named them all, but now I think of it, I did omit to ask about your pug." "Oh, Fido doesn't mind you." "Then who is it that objects to my coming to see you?" "It is only I, Mr. Spudds." Pick-Me-Up. Lore Will Find Way. George "But, Mabel, dear, marriage is out of the question just now. You seem to have forgotten that I'm but a poor clerk on a meagre salary." Mabel "Oh, George; don't let poverty interfere with our happiness. We can manage to live on ono meal a day if necessary." Georg "But you know nothing of household duties, sweetheart; why, you can't even eaok!" Mabel "Indeed, I can, love. I have kept it a secret from you, but the time has come for my confession. George, dear, I graduated from a cooking school three months ago." George "My darling, come to my arms; it shall be as you wish one meal a day will be more than enough." Chicago News. SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL A huge eel of the Fiji Islands, fif teen feet long, is reported to have a peculiar throat formation causing it to whistle when excited. A Dutch physiologist conoludes, con trary to usual belief, that in man is no chemical regulation of heat, oxygen consumption being the same at all seasons. An association has -been formed in Paris for exploiting the new method of purifying water by means of elec tricity, which Drs' Tvcdal and Roux have indicated. To hold an ear of corn for eating a neat device is made of a wire bow, with a handle twisted in the center and spring cones at each end to grasp the ear and hold it rigid. Crutches are now being made with a hinge in the center, fitted with a sooket joint, so they can be folded up when not in nse, thus ocoupying half the space of the ordinary kind. A difficulty of administering medi cine to email children is overcome by Professor Alsnel, who affirms that a mixture of equal parts of soap lini ment and aloes will act as a cathartic when rubbed in small quantity upon the abdomen. Photographs have recently been suc cessfully taken under water, at a dis tance of ten or twelve feet. The camera was carried by a diver; the light was supplied by an electric lamp carried in the diver's headpiece. The experi ments were carried out in the bay of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Experiments have been going on for the last twelve years for the purpose of trying to learn something of the characteristics of the Atlantio Ocean aa a great moving body of water. As a result the whole Atlantio is shown to be slowly circulating round and ronnd like an enormous pool. The intelligence of birds is illustra ted by a discovery made the other day by a man in Stuttgart. Seeing that a swallow's nest on his house had no opening, he got a ladder and exam ined it. He found five dead sparrow in the nest, the swallows having evi dently killed the intruders by closing up the nest with mud. In Berlin the firemen wear water jackets, with a double skin, which they are able to fill with water from the hose. If the space between the two layers becomes overfilled tho water escapes through a valve at the top of the helmet and flows down over the 'fireman, like a cascade protecting him doubly. The smoke helmets, largely used in Germany, Austria, Holland and Italy, enable the wearer to breathe land see at his ease in a smoke-laden Atmosphere. In some instaooes the apparatus inoludes a means of tele phonic communication with the. street below. 'Girl Who Looks Like a Mermaid. If the mythical mermaid ever had a physical reality in every day life, Miss Fannie Minks, now in the Cincinnati City Hospital, might easily apply for the honor. At twenty, she is afflicted with what in medical parlance is known as ichthyosis, a term derived from the Greek, meaning fish-scale disease. This is not a misnomer in the case of this particular patient, aa her arms and limbs are covered with scales their en tire length. The scales are similar to those of a fish, and could not be dis tinguished from them. The disease is extremely rare, only one other case being recalled in the history of the institution. The pres ent caae is exciting considerable inter est in medical circles from the fact that it is well developed and its symp toms so well pronounced. Very little can be done for Miss Fannie, except to keep the affected parts as soft as possible with frequent hot baths aud the application of unctuons ointments, for once the scales become dry they break off at tho joints and leave ugly and painful sores. The disease, as far aa the investiga tion has gone, seems to be due to im perfect capillary circulation and the failure of shedding particles of dead skin, which in the normally consti tuted being goes on unconsciously. Miss Minks is receiving every atten tion that the hospital with its facilities can afford, and the best of nursing, al though a cure cannot be effected. A New Kind f Water Tower. A portable water tower is the inven tion with which San Francisco is to bid defiance to fires in the future. It is the invention of H. H. Garter, master machinist in the city's fire de partment. It is a metal structure weighing only 6800 pounds. It is a telescope, the inner tubo of which is of brass and twenty feet long, and the outer one of steel, twenty-two feet long. The old-fashioned cotton hose pipe, which frequently burst, is not needed at all. The tower is arranged in sections, so that it can be deflected at any angle within forty degrees of the perpendic ular. The Whole front of a burning building is thus exposed to the streams from thetower.andnot merely acouplo cf windows, as has hitherto been the case. The whole tower was con structed in San Francisco at a cost of $5000. A.rln. We have liquid air, or aerine, a liquid which maintains a temperature of 200 degrees below zero, but we scarcely know how to use it. Possi bly it might be used for hardening steel, as we know the quicker we cau cool red-bot steel the harder it be comes. For drills, cutlery, etc.', its use as a cooling agent should be verv effectual. Where Chief Justices Came From. To this date seven Chief Justices have eat upon the bench of the Su preme Court of the United States. Connecticut, New York, Maryland, Virginia and Illinois each furnished one,' and Ohio two. LIFE IN DAWSON CITY. THE REAL EL DORADO TO BE FOUND - IN THE FAR NORTH. A Straggling Collection of Los; Hate and Tents on a Swamp Old-Timers Han Got Used to Heventv Degrees Below , Zero In Tents A Gold Miner's Outfit. "The River-Trip to the Klondike" is the title of an article in the Century, written by John Sidney Webb. Tho author says: On the morning of August 17, at about four o'clock, broad daylight, we Came up to that collection of forty large , log cabins and five hundred tents, sprawled at the foot of Moose skin Mountain, named Dawson City. Helter-skelter, in a marsh, lies this collection of odds and ends of honses and habitations, tho warehouses of the two companies cheek by jowl with cabins and tents; a row of bar-rooms called Front street; the side streets deep in mud; the river-bank a mass of miners' boats, Indian canoes, and logs; the screeching of the sawmill; the dis mal, tuneless scrapiug of the violin of the dance-halls, still wide open; the dogs everywhere, fightirg and snarl ing; the men either "whooping it up" or working with the greatest rapidity to unload the precious freight we had brought all of this rustling and hust ling made the scene more like the out ride of a circus-tent, including the smell of the sawdust, than anythiug else in the world. This, then, is the real El Dorado! One wonders where they all live. One wonders, in amazement, where they are all going to live through the awful winter that is approaohing. Here u the true pinch of the situation. It is not a question of food ; it is a question of shelter. There aro no logs fit to make a cabin to bo found on tho river within thirty miles of Dawson City. To wait for winter means that it will be too late to build a cabin, because the moss which is used to fill the chinks between the logs by that time will be frozen solid, and be useless unlesB thawed out over a fire, a very wearisome job. The old-timers have got used to seventy degrees below zero in tents; and even if the robe over them freezes solid, n match is smug gled from under the bedclothes, the fire somehow lighted in the sheet-iron stove, and there they lie until the stove , is red-hot before they dare emerge frcm under the skin rugs. But how are the newcomers to survive the cruel exposure the lawyers, clerks, doctors and mechanics? Dawson City seems like a joke. Eighteen hundred and fifty miles from St. Michael Island this is where they have gold, millions of gold, and noth ing better than a muddy swamp to livoj in; gold-dust and nuggets in profusion, and yet the negroes in the cabins of a Southern plantation live better than the richest man in the oountry. Our arrival at Dawson was at a very criti cal time. We had brought with us nearly four hundred tons of provisions,' and this fact served to allay the anxious fears of many who were becoming, panio-strioken at the idea that there.' would be a sooroity of food during thej winter. No news had come to us by! way of the ocean of later date than! June 10, but newspapers had been re-1 ceived over the summit at Dawson off date as late as July 26; and so the re-' port that crowds were swarming into the gold-fields had reached them, but was news to us. The town was' thoroughly scared, and was overrun' with men who had come down from the diggings, often twenty and twenty five miles, to make sure of their out fits for the wiuter: and so determined were they to procure them that they sat themselves down calmly in line, like men waiting to buy seats at a first-night performance, determined to wait until the goods were put up and set aside in their names. An outfit for a miner means every thing that he uses duriug the winter, aud this, being reduoed to its lowest terms, means bacon and beans. There are other things, of course, in tins and in gunny-sacks flour, sugar, salt, pickles, dried fruits, desiccated pota toes to suit the taste; but the work is done, and the gold is found and cleaned up, and miles aud miles of the wilderness conquered, and cold weather and wintry winds withstood, on bacon and beans. It is the easiest food to pack, the quickest to prepare, and the most lasting and sustaining. The miner usually reckons on getting bis outfit in November, because he can carry on a sledge, after the snow has set in, four times as much as he can pack on his baok, and if he is fortuuate enough to have dogs he can draw muob more. The Supreme Hymn. Speaking of hymns, the Rev. Robert Collyer said the other day: "I well remember one day when this subjeot was the object of a discussion between Ralph Waldo Emerson and Dr. Oliver Wendell Holmes. The latter said "lut many of the so-called hymns were mere pieces of cabinet work. Then his voice deep ened, his eyes shone, as we remember him iu his noblest moments, as he said: 'One hymn I think supreme.' Emerson threw his head back, as he always did when his attention was ar rested, and waited. Dr. Holmes re peated the first verse: " 'Thou bidden Love of God, whoso height, Whose deptb.uufathomed.oo man knows, I see from far tby beauteous light; Inly I sigh for thy repose. My heart is pained, nor can it be At rest, till it finds rest in thee.' " 'I know I know,' oxclaimed Emerson. That is the supreme hymn.'" New York Tribune. Women Doctors Plentiful. One reason why female physicians are so plentiful in Russia is that the country inoludes among its inhabitants over 12,000 Mohammedans, who do not allow male physicians to treat women. "HEIMCANG." As we go forth each hopeful, beckoning day To join In mirth or sterner lessons learn. Most glad of all we find tho homeward way And sweet return. Thus, when life's day of work and play is past, And we no more with weary footsteps roam, Sweetest of all will be to us at la-.t, The going home. C. H. Crandull, lu the Chords A LIfo. HUMOR OF THE DAY. Chappy "Ah! Miss Maud, would you give me a penny for my thoughts?" Maud "You're exorbi tant ."Standard. "In the case of many a suspected murderer the innocent often suffer." "Shake! You've been on a jury, too, have you?" Judge. Wifey "If I had my life to live over again I wonldu't marry the best man alive!" Hubby "Quite right! I wonldn't ask you!" Standard. Friend "I understand the vermi form appendix is of no nse." Doctor "Nonsense! It has been a gold mine to the medical profession." Puok. He "I saw Miss Scorcher get a bad fall from her bicyele the other day." She "What did you. do?" He "I offered her a pin." Atchison Globe. Florenz "Here comes my Hans. The dear boy says I am always in his thcughts." Marie "Well, he cer Uinly looks as if he had a weight on his mind." Standard. "Would it be right to call a house mover a shoplifter?" asked the ambi tious boodler. "Hardly," said As bury Peppers. "He is apt to be a housebreaker, though. " Cincinnati Enquirer. The chief difference between tho man with a lot of new-made money and the gentle zephyr," said the Corn fed Philosopher, "is that the gentle zephyr blows, itself quietly." In dianapolis Journal. The Dun "I hope you won't be offended if I remind you that we are very much in need of the money?" The Dunned "Not at all. II any body's goiug to be offended it is your self." Boston Transcript. Lady Guest (to hostess "Really, I couldn't eat another hot roll, dear. I don't know how many I've had al ready 1" Freddy (sitting opposite) "I do; you've eaten eight! I've been counting." Boston Globe. First College Girl "What is to be the title of your graduation essay?" Second College Girl " 'Beyond the Alps Lies Italy.' What's the title of yours?" First College Girl "Be yond the altar lios the wushtub." Judge. Mrs. Decree "The newspapers are very discriminating." Her Friend "Why so, dear?" Mrs. Deoree "They publish columns about my divorce suit, and now they don't say a word about second marriage." North American. Mamma (to Tommy, who is taking his first lesson in reading) "What's the difference between a comma and a period?" Tommy "A comma, mumma, is a dot with a tail hanging to it, while a period is just a plain dot." Judge. 1 iL"Matilda, I wish you would ask that young Mr. Peters to have his cuff buttons replated." "Why, mamma, what do you mean?" "They seem to leave black streaks on the ba: of your shirt waiBt every even ing." Standard. "Tho trouble with you," said Mr. Ruffedge's wife after a warm debate, "ij that you are a oontlrmed dyspep tic." "No, my dear," was the answer, "that's not correct. The trouble with me is that I am a contradicted dyspeptic." Washington Star. "You shall bo queen of my home," said young Mr. Northside, enthusias tically, when Miss Perrysville had given her promise to marry him. "I'd rather be the chancellor of the ex chequer, George, dear," replied the practioal maiden. Pittsburg Chron icle. Little Dot "Oh, mamma, the organ grinder's monkey is at the window, an he has a little round box iu his hand." Mamma "Well, my pet, what do you think he wants?" Little Dot (after a glanco at the organ grind er) "I dess he wants to borrow some soap." "Habberjohn doesn't Becm to have a very lovable nature." "Well, no. If Habberjohn were at a banquet and some one should discover that there were thirteen at the table, all eyes would instinctively turn toward Hub berjohn as the one to go." In dianapolis Journal. "Young man, this is the third time this week you have come to take my daughter sleighriding. If you pay cash for the horses and sleigh it meana either lunacy or bankruptcy, and if you don't it means that yju are a dead beat." "I own the livery stablo, sir." "Thafa different." Chicago Tribune. Aunt Sarah (as she lays aside her bonnet) "Weren't those flowers that they had at Jane Newcomb's funeral handsome, Eben? It does seem's though some folks just have every thing. Now I s'pose they'll have a monument with angels on it, or some thing. But let them just wait; our turu'll come some time, see if it don't." Judge. Juneau Joke "So the boys lynched old Chilkoot Sam? Why, ho' was a harmless old critter! Couldn't tell gold dust from brown sugar. What'd he done?" Placer Pete "Why. onenighl last week, when it was freezin' the lamp blazes so that a feller could take 'em and uso 'em fer whet-stones, that driveling old chilblain said it remiud od him of a cold New Year's day back in the sixties." Puck.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers