' ' 1 " 1 l "RatGs ol "Advcitislntf. Adm'rs and Exceto' Notices, ck 6 timet $ E ft Auditor's Notices, each.. 6ft Transient advertising, per Hijuure vf 10 Unci or loan, 3 time or lens 2 00 For eaoli subsequent insertion CO Professional cards, 1 year 6 09 Special notices, per line 14 Obituary and Muringe Notices, each 1 0) Yearly Advertising, one square UllO Yearly Advertising, two square" 1-j 00 Ycai'y Adver'ing iliree square Hi) 00 Yearly Advertising. I column I"; "O Yearly Advertising, J coliiinn S? l-O Yearly Advertising, 1 column "0 q Advertisements displayed more than ordinarily will be charged for at ths rate (per column) of 00 00 The Vrinlcr and the Types. Perhaps there it, no departments of ontorpri.-C! whose details are loss under, t-tood by intelligent people than the art preservative" tho schicTenieut of t!ie types. Every day, their lives long, .hey era THE ELK ADVOCATE, A LOCAL AKD CETiltAl KEWSPATEB, Published Every Thursday BY JOHN F. MOOilb Per Ywtr in advance $1 60 3 Car All subscriptions to be paid in ad .nce. Orders for Job ffork respectfully solicited. ttt9uOfflco on Main Street, in tie second tlory of Ilouk & Oillis Store. , Address JOHN G. HALL, i;litok & rnorRiETOR. JIIN G. HALL, Editor. I'OLCJtE GJi'V.TIHEB 31 J. V. MOORE, Publisher. MS-1 50 Per l'ear inldvanre. TEtt if If U EETTEHS TO .7IEIHCVS NUMBER ONE. My Dear Sir : I am much obliged for your answer to my inquiry: for though I hardly expected evidence that would be satisfactory to my own miud, I like to know what others consider proof, and to h ear their own statement cf their faith, rather than trust to tho representations of opponents. You think it " can be established without difficulty both fiotu the Bible and from other sources" that saints who have de parted this life " not only hear us. but grant us their intercession and good offi ces." To my miud you have not " es tablished " either of these points, hut tmrn rarlirr fiirni:lieil nrirunienttf titltifnut your doctrine of the invocation of .be saints. As a sincere inquirer after tiutb, I am as much bound to reject evidence which is not conclusive as to admit that which is. If you can show from the word of 5od " that the invo cation of faints is not only proper, b;t that wc are even directed to avail our selves of their assistance," then I am in duty bound to acknowledge jour doc trine and adopt your custom. But any merely human testimony of that effect is ol no account towards establishing such a doctrine as an article of faith. The opinion and practice i f any uuiu. spired men, even taints and martyrs, can nt best but furnish a degree of ff'.lnbil. i.'Z-greu'er or Ie?s according to circum stances that the thing is taught in the Bih'e. Yet you seem to think the tes. f.imony of such men as Basil, Augustine, Cyprian, Ircnaeus must be admitted on this point, " to be not only sound but authoritative." If they were inspired, aud spuLe nut their own opinion but the Kord of God, I grant it; however much we may esteem their testimony, it can never le conclusive. You advance several arguments to .-how that depart ed saints kuoie all our circumstances. hetir our requests, and actually aid us by their interecss i. I would I ke to !:o'.v therein these arguments appear to ine inconclusive, ami how some ol them even make against your position. J!.:t in the first place you yield the very l.oiut. 1 expected you would try to prove. by admitting that t'ney tin nt hear us jirtuly do not know our affnirs by any o 'rut mode of communication hut be. tciue acquainted with our wants and wiMicsuilv through the medium of the divine omniscience. It seems to me that this admission is well nigh fatal to ji.ur theorj. 1 ai:ree that the saints may ktn.w whatever God is pleased to (''ititnuiiicati to tliem, but 1 think you will not rttend that they are oinm tei tt. Doubtless those who have de patted this life " to be wiib Christ " vn joy the preence and fellowship of the in.'iniie spirit. They " know God , " but it Hits nut by any means follow thai they know all that He know. Thai t nppoMtiou would Le u : terly absurd, as ihny are still Cnite, a,:l it is no h -s ub Kind tu asMimc that I hey know every ltitig ahoot thsir friends ou carih. or all that tinybtxly un firth may think or say in reference to themselves. Just think bow many myriads daily oiler requests to the lilcsstd Virgin. Does she know nil thes i people and att thsir tin-urn itunret, rnhet, they fay " pray for us ' " V,'? agree then (do we not ?) thai depart. J saints have o;i'y xwh kii'neffr of tilings on curt1! us liol is pleased to coiiiiniiuie.tte to tb.cui. As you say, " ihfy hear our petitions through Al mighty God, who is cognizant of all things." We have ilire. t vommtiuica. tion with Gud, the Father, .Son and Holy Ghi'st, but not with Paul, Peter r.nf the rest, ft is therefore a very dit. fereM thing from aLiug christians on iMfth to ' pray for us," to mike the !' requi-ht i.f those with whom we have no communication who become i. ware iif our request or not, accordiug n ;5ol is pleased to reveal it to them or iiain it iti l.bown counsels. This bc ii g n-tt!.:d, is it proper and avisible to v: u-parti.d saints to pr.iy for us? You answer, yes.but do not ou incu ue. As the piintcr will pu-f.-r .,hurt haters, "I will defer th rsa.-ons for my dissent tj another time. Yours truly, kv an Delist. A treut'euirui leuiarkcd i ne day to an I ris Kniun that the science of optics was n iw broiiL'ht to a pt rtccliou; that by I he aid of a telescope, which he had just purchased, he could discern objects t m iucreilible distance. ' My dear l.'iluw," replied the Irishtirin, " I have riic at my bouse in the county of Wex. lord that will be a match for it ; it brought the church of Kniseorthy so near to my view, that I oould Lear the congregation kingini; psalms." Ad Irishman, some time ago, was committed to the penitentiary and for a misdemeauor sentenced to work ou the treadmill for a mouth. Ho observed at the expiration ot bis task, " what a it at deal of botheration and fatigue it would bave saved us poor craythurt, if they bad bat isvintol it to go by itatue l.kv n) otW wather tui!!a." THE M1LSE FV.VEtML. I never liked my uncle's business, though he took me when my father died, and brought me np as bis own son. The good man bad no children. II is wife was long, dead, aud he had an hon. sst old woman lor a housekeeper, and a flourishing buniuess, in the undertaking l:ue, to leave to somebody, but he did not leave it to me, aud Pll tell you the reason : When I had been about five years with him, aud bad grown worth my salt, as he used to say, a death occurred in our neighborhood, which caused greater lamentation than any we had beard of since, my apprenticeship began. 1 he deceased gentleman was a Mr. Elswor- thy. The family had beeu counted gen try in their day. I should have said my uncle lived m New lork, and all the world knows what York shire fami lies are. Well, the lSlsworthy'a were of good family, and very proud ot it, tho they had lost every acre ot a good old estate which bad belonged to them time out of miud. I am not sure whether it was tluir grandfather's dice and cock fightinc, or their father's going surety lor a friend who did something wrong in a Government office, that brought them to this poor pass ; but there was no house in all York where candles weut further, and tcaleaves were better used up. There was a mother, two sisters aud a cousin who lived with them. The mother was a stately lady, never seen out of a black brocade. The sisters were not over young or handsome, but they dressed as fine as they could' The cousin was counted one of the prettiest women in Yorkshire, but she walked with a crutch, having met with an acci dent in her childhood Master Charles was tho only sou. and the youngest of the family. He was a tall, haodsome, dashing young man, uncommonly polite, and a gieat favorite with the ladies. It is said there were some red eyes in the town, when the story got wiud that he was going to be married to the Honora ble Miss Westbay. Her father was younger brother to the Karl of Harrow gate, and had seveu girls beside, her, wiihout a penny fot oue of them; but Miss Westbay was a beauty, and the wonder was that she had r.ot got mar. ried long ago being nearly sevjn years out, dancing, sinking, and pluyiug tip. top pieces at all the parties. Halt a dozen matches had been talked of for her, but somehow they broke down one al'ti r another. Her father was rather impatient to see her oft'; and so were her sisters, poor things, and uo wonder, for, grow up as they might, nut oue of them would the old man sutler to come out till the eldest wasdisposed of, and at la it there seemed something like a certainty ot tlr.it business. Young Mr. Klswor. thy and "dm struck up a courtship. He was l.isein t il isn't tl.u tbe word ? at un assize ball, paid marked attentions at the b.iliop's party, aud was believed to have popped the question at a pic nic, aller l.orl II urowate, the largest utinichol for in toe Northeastern Dank, got bim pio'.li itcd from clerkship to be manager, it's true, be was some years younger than Miss Westbay, and people said theie had been -something between hi:n and his pretty cousin ; but a lord's neiee, with beauty, accomplishments, and a serviceable connection, does not come in every young way ; so the wed ding diy was fixed for the f.-st of J aim. ary, and all the niilli:;i;rs were busy with the bride's bonnets and d'esses. ft was just a mouth to couiu, and cv eryb uly i talking of iho match, when Mr. Klsworthy tell sick. At first they said it was cold; then it turned to a brain fever; at l.t the d ooLor give no hopes, aud wiihiu the saiiio week Mr. Hie worthy died. The j!o ucighbor. Iioo 1 was cast int.) m luruiug. A prom, i.siug young ill a:, in a manner the ouly dependence of his family, newly promo ted to a station of trust and influence, and on tho eve of marriage, everybody lamented bis untimely de-itb, and sympathized with his bereived re lations and his inteudel bride. I thiuk my uuele lamented m s of all. None of his customers, to ifly knowledge, ever got so much of his sorrow. Whcu wo was stint for in the way of business, it struek me that be staid particularly long. The good man could talk of nothing but the grief of tho afflicted family ho the mother went iuto fits, aud tho sisters tore their hair how the cousiu talked of wearing morning all her days and how it was feared that Miss Westbay, who insisted on seeing him, would never reoover her senses. The county papers gave expression to the publiu grief. There were a great many verses written about it. Nobody passed the bouse of moruning without a sigh or a suitable remark. My uncle superin tended the making of tho coffin, as I had never seen him do any other; aud when tbe workmeu had gone home be spent hours at eight, fiuishia it by bim elf. : The funeral was to set . out for the J fa-sib tjtiH; Ju. vbti Histcr cbucob it Beverly, about threo o'clock io the af ternoon. It was made a strictly private affair, though hundreds of the tow us. men would have testified their respect for the dead by accompanying it all tbe way. Tbe members of the family, in two mourning coaches, and the under taker's men, were alone allowed to fol. low poor Elsworthy to his hist resting place, and the coffin was not to be bro't till the latest hour. My uncle had got it finished to his mind, but evidently did not wish me to look at his work. He had a long talk with Steele and Stoneman, two of his most confidential assistants, in the workshop, aftcthours, and they weut away looking remarkably close. All-was in train, and the funeral to take place the next day, when, com ing down his own etairs they were rather steep and narrow, for we lived in one of the old houses of York my uu. cle slipped, fell, and brok4 his leg. I thought he would have gone mad when the doctor told bim he must not attempt to move or mind any business for weeks to come, and I tried to pacify bim by ofTering to conduct the f'urneral with the help of Steele and Stoneman. No. thing would please the old man ; I nev er saw him so lar out of temper bclore. He swore ut his bad luck, threw the pillows at his housekeeper, ordered me to bring him up the key of the work shop, and kept it fast clutched in his hand. I set up with him all that night. In a cotipla of hours he grew calm and sensible, but could not sleep, though the houfc was all quiet, and the housekeep er snonug iu the in the corner, lhen he began to g'oao, as if there was some, thing worse than a broken leg on his mind, aud " Tom," said he, " haven't I bben always kind to you?" " No doubt of it uncle," said I. " Well, Toja, I want you to do me a great service a particular service, Tom, and Pll never forget it to you. You know Mr. E'sworthy's fuucral comeiJofiF to-morrow at 2 o'clock, and they're very high people." '" Never fear, uncle; I'll take sare of it as well as if you were there yourself." " I knew you would, Tom I knew you would. I could trust you withHbe hearsing of un carl's cofflo ; and for managing mutes T don't know jour e quul. Hut there's something more to be done. Coma over beside me, Tom ; that old woman don't hear well at the best, aud she's sleeping now, aud no mistake. Will you promise me" and bis Voice sunk to a whisper " that whatever you hearjor see, you'll make uo remark to any one living, and be cau tious as you can about the body ? There's no foul play," said he, for I began to look frightened ; " but may bet I. is leg's a judgment for takiug on such business. Howsomever. I'm to have three hundred pounds foritj and you'll getthe half, it you'll conduct it properly, aud give me your solemn promise. 1 know you'll never break that." " Uucle." said I, " I'll promise, and keep it too; but you must tell me what it in." "Well, Tom" aud ho drew a long breath "its a living man you're going to put in that eulliu in the workshop ! 1 have made it high aud full of air holes; he'll lie quite comlortable. Nobody knows about itabut Steele aud Stoneman and yourself; they'll go with you Miud you trust no due else. Don't look so stupid man ; can't you understand, Mr. worthy didn't die at all, and never had brain fever; but be wan's to get off Irmu marrying Miss tVcslbay, or some thing of iIihI- sort. They're taking a (pieer way about it, 1 must say ; but these geuteel people bave ways of their own. It was the cousin that prepared my mind for it iu the buck parlor ; that woman's up to anything. I sto.id out against having a hand iu it, till I heard that the sexton of Beverly Church was a poor rela'iou of theirs. The key of the comn is tu be given to him, it w;ll be locked, not screwed down, you see; and when all's overat'the vault it will be dalk night by that t'me, for we don't move till tbree, und these December days are short he'll come aud help Mr Elswuilhv out, and smugi'le Vm off to Hull with his son the carrier. There's ships enough there to take him anywhere under a feigned name." " Could he get utF the marriage no easiei V said 1, for the the thought of taking a living man in a hearse, and heating tbe services read over him, made my blood run cold. You see I was young then. "There's something more than the marriage in it, though they ddu't telli me. Odd things will happen in my business, and this is one cf toe quere.st. But you'll manage it, Tom, and get my blessing, besides you." half ol tho three hundred pounds ; aud don't be afraid ol anything coming wrong to him. for I never saw any man look so like a corpse." I promised my uncle to do the busi ness and keep the see-ret. A hundred and fifty pounds was no joke to a young man beginniug the world in the under faking line; and the old man was so pleased frith' what he called toy sense lud utjdersUpdipg,' that before fsllin asleep, close upon daybreak, he talked of taking me into partnership, and the job we might expect from the Harrow. gate family; for tbe dowager countess was nearly fourscore, and two of the young ladies were threatencd-wi'h de cline. Next day, early in the afternoon, Steele, Stoneman and I were at woik. The family seemed duly mournful, I suppose, on account of tbe servants, Mr. Elsworthy looked wonderfully well in his shroud ; and if one had not look ed close iuto the coffin, they never would have seen the airholes. Well, we set out, mourning coaches, hearse and all, through the yellow fog of a December day. There was nothing but sad faces at all tbe windows as we passed ; 1 heard them admiring Steele and Stoneman for the feeling hearts they showed ; but when we got out ou the Beverly road the cousiu gave us a sign, and away we went at a rattling pace; a funeral never got over the ground at such a rate before. Yet it was getting dark when we reach, ed the Old Minister, and the curate "rumbled at having to duty so late. He got over the service nearly as quick as we got over tbe miles. The coffin was lowered into the vault ; it was more than half filled with Mr. Klsworthy's fore fathers, but there was a good wide grate io the vault, and no waut of air. It was all riirht. The clerk and tho clergyman started off to their homes the mourning coaches weut to tho Crown Inn, where the ladies were to wait till the sexton eamr to let them know he was safe out the cousin would Dot go nouie without that news and I slipped him the key at the church door, as he discoursed to us all about the mysterious dispensations ot 1 rOTidencs My heart was light going home ; so were Steele's and Stoueman's None of us liked the job, but we were all to be paid for it ; aud I must say the old man come down handsomely with the need ful, not to speak of Burtou ale ; and I was to be made his partner without de lay. We got tha money, aud bad the jolifieation ; but it wasn't right over, and I was just getting into bed, when there was a ring at our door. bell, and tbe housekeeper came to say that Dr. Parks wauted tu see me or my uncle What could he waut, and how had he come back so soon '( Parks was the Klswor thy's family doctor and the ouly strang er at the funeral ; he went in the second mourning coach, aud I lelt him talking to the sexton. My clothes were thrown ou, and I was down stairs in a minute, looking as sober as I could ; but the doctor's look would have sobered any mail. "Thonus," said he, "this Las turned out a bad business, aud I cannot account fori); but Mr. Elsworthy ha died in earnest. When the sexton and I opened the coffin we found him cold and stiff. 1 think be died from fright, sueh a face ot terror I never saw. It wasn't your uncle's fault; there is uo doubt he had air euough, but it can't be helped; and the less said about it the better for all parties. I am going to lr. Adams, to take him dowu with me to Beverly. The sexton keeps poor Elsworthy to fee if anything can fie done; and Adams is the only man wc can trust; but I know it's no use." The doctor's apprehension was foun. ded Mr. Elsworthy could not be recov ered; they laved hiiu dowu strain iu the coffin with airholes. The hdics camo b.ick. and we kept the secret; but in less tli no six months after, a rumor went ahrea I of heavy forg iries on the Nurt easteni Bank. On investigation they proved to bo over fifty thousand, and nobody was implicated but the decased manager. His family knew nothing a bout it; being all ladies, they were en tirely iguoraut of baukiug affairs; but they left York next season, toak a haud some house at Scarborough, and were known t iget money regularly from Lon. duu. They uever employed any doctor but Parks; aud his medical manage ment did not appear to pnspir, lor they wore never well, aud always nervous ; not one ot them could sleep alone, or without light in the room ; and an atten dant from a private asylum had to be got for the cousiu. I don't think the matter ever left my uncle's miud ; be uever world take au odd job after it; aud all the partnerships iu Eulund would not have made meeouliuue iu the buniuess, aud ruutbe risk of another false funeral. " Par are," said a table orator addnt '. ing his brethren, " Two roads tro' dis world. De one am a broad aud narrow road dat leada to pcrdiction, and do oder a narrow and broad road dat leads to destruotii-n." " If dat am de case,'' said one of bis sable hearer, dis culled iudiwidual takes to de woods." A young man recently wrote to his sweetheart, ssying : " There is not a globule ot blood in my heart which does not bear your photograph." He had it very bad, hadn't he. "I do deolara Sal, you look f pretty enough to eat.'J Waal, Solomon, ain t I eating aa fast as I can." replied Sal, I wiib bef wcth. full. LOU nOLLtJTO. An Englishman who was traveling ou tho Mississippi river, told some rather tou jh stories about the London thieves. A Cincinnati chap named Ca:,c, heard these naratives with a silent but expres sive humph ! and then remarked that he thought the esletn thieves beat the London operators all hollow. ' Why so ? ' inquired the Englishman, with surprise ' Pray, have you lived much iu tho West ? ' ' Not a great deal. I undertook to set up business at Desmiones llapids a while ago, but the rascally people stole uearly every thing I had, finally a Welch miner run off with my wife.' Good God 1' said tho Englishman, and you uever found her ? ' Never to this day. But that was not the worst of it ? ' 'Worse! Why, what could be worse than stealimr a mau's wife ? ' ' Stealing bis children, I should say,' said the implacable Case. 'Children?' ' Y'es, a nigger woman, who bad not any of her own abducted my youngest daughter, aud sloped aud jined tho Iu. gens.' ' Great Heavens ! did you not see her doit?' Sec her ? Yes, and she hadn't ten rods the start of me, and she plunged into the lake and swan) like a duck and there wasu't a canoe to follow with.' The Emzlishtnan laid back in his chair, and called for another mug of all ana uff, while Case smoked his ci gar, bis credulous friend at the same time said most remorsely. ' I shan't go any farther west I think, at length observed the excited John Bull. I should not advise any one to go,' said Case quietly. 'My poor brother once lived out there, but be had to leave, although his business was the best in the country.' ' What business was he In ?' ' Lumbering had a saw mill ' ' And they stole his lumber ? ' ' Yes, and his saw logs too." Saw. logs.' ' Yes, whole dozens of floe blaek w.il nut lo"s were carried off iu a single night. True, upon my honor, sir. He tried every way to prevent it, hired men to watch his logs, but il was all no use. They whipped 'em away as easy as if there had beeu no oue there. They'd steal them out of the river, out of the coves, aud even out of the mill. ways. ' Good graeiou3.' 'Just to give you sn idea how they can steal out thete,' continued Case, smiling a sly wiuk at the listening com pany : " just to jive you au idea did you ever work iu a saw. mill 1 " ' Never.' " Well, my brother one day bought an all fired fine black walnut log I rar feet three at the butt, and not a knot in it. He was determined to keep that lot;, and lured two Scotchmen to witch it all night. Well, they took a small demijohn of whisky with them, snaked the log up the side ol the hill, and then sat down on the log to play kcerds just to keep them awake, you see. 'Tw.is a monstrous big log bark four inches thick. Well, as I was aayinsr, they played keerds and drank whisky ail night aud as begun to grow light they went asleep astraddle of the log. About a minute after day light my brother went over to the mill to see how they got ou, and l'ie log was gone : " And thpy sitting on it?" " Sitting on the bark ! The thieves had drove an iron wedge into the butt end which pointed down th-n hiil. and hitched a yoke of oxen on and pulled it right out, leavinjr the s!ie!i, the Scotch ers sitting astraddle of it fast asleep." The Englishman here aro-e, dropped his cigar stump iuto the spittoon, and looked at his watch, said he thought he would go on deck, aud see bow far we'd be down tho river by mnrn:ng. A poung m in recently wrote to his sweet heart saying : ''There is not a globule of blood iu my heart which does not bear your photograph." He had it very bad. hadu't ho ? A cement which is a good protcc. tiou against weather, water, and fire, to a certain extent, is made by mixing a gallon of water with two gallons of brine ; and then stir in two und a half pounds ol brown sugar and three pounds of common salt; put it ou with a brush, like paint. The following purports to bo a modieal puff : " Dear Doctor I shall be one hundred and seventy five years old uext October, por over eighty four years I have been an invalid, una ble to step, except when moved by a lever. But a year aso I heard of the Granicular Syrup. I bought a lottle, smelt the cork, aud found myself a man. I can now run twelve miles and a ha fan hour -rTbe past summer his. been the wettest in Europe ioee 1TJ V accustomed to road the newspapers, to una fault Willi its statements its argu ment?, its looks, to plume themselves upon the oiLCuvery ol gome roguish and acrobatic type, that gets into a frolic and stands upou its head, or some word with a waste letter or two in it; hut of the process hy which the newspaper is made. of the myriuds oi motions necessary to its composition, they know little and think less. Thoy imagine they discourse of a won ler, indeed, when they sp"sk of tbe lmr, while carpet, woven for thcui to walk on, from the rags that fluttered olT the hack ul the beggar yesterday. Hut there is to us something more wonderful still, when we look at the hundred and fifty-two little boxes, some, thing shaded with inky lingers, that compose a "printer's case," noiseless except the click ol the types, as one by one they take their place in the growing line we thiuk we have found the mar. vel of the art. Strewn in those little boxes arc thin, parallegrams of metal, every oue good lor something that goes to ujuke up written language ; the visible footprints of thought upon carpets of rags. We think how many fragments of fancy there arc in these boxes ; Low many atoms ot poetry and eloquence the printer can make here aud there, if he only h is a little chart to woik by ; how many facts in small handsful, how much, truth in chaos ! Now he picks up tho scattered cle. meuls until he holds in his band a stun, za of Gray's elegy, or a monodony upon a Grimes "all buttoned tip before." Now lie sets up a "Puppy Missing," and now a " Paradise Lost." He ar rays a bride in " small caps," and a son net in "Nonpareil." He announces that the languishing " live," in one sen tence, transposes tho word and deplores that days arc " evil " in the next. A poor jest ticks its way into the printer's hand, like a little clock just running down, and a strain of eloqucuce marcnes into line. We tancy wo 3a n the tel. the difference by the click of types ; out perhaps not. The types that told of a wedding yes terdty, announces a burial to tnoi row perhaps in the selfsame letters. They are the demerits to make words of. Those types are a world with some thing iu it, as beautiful as spring and as rich a- summer, and as grand ts tut. umn ; flowers that frost cannot will, but fruit that shall ripen for all time. This, That, and the Other. Domestic Cannibals Back-biters. What is most likely to become a wo man ? A little girl. What is always i a visible, jut never out of sight ? The letter s. When is a bonnet not a bonnet? When it become & lady What trade would you resoinnien j to a short man ? Grow tir rocerj What color is a secret best kept io 1 la viukt (inviolate.) Genual Sherman has declared himself iu favor of the President. MoTTrtKS. The lawyer's motto bo brief. The doctor's unit be patient. The potter's motto beware. The type setter's motto be composed. The New York Centrjl Hailroad is about to import enogh sierl rails from England to relay two miles of their track in order to test tlitir durability. " Swear not at all," stiJ a chaplain tj a soldier. lie replied, "I do not swear ut all, but only to those who annoy me." Biddy, while on a be r; ieg cxji lition was asked by a lady if bio had any children. " Yes mum," replied Biddy, with great, readiness, " I'm the mother ot au orphan." As wo tw.i are one," said a witty brute to his wife, " when I beat you I beat half of myself." " Well," said the wife, " beat your own half, uot mine." A little girl of for.r years was recent ly called us a witness on a cusa in the police court, and in answer io the quo, tiou of what become of litiie girls who told lies she replied that they were t:nt to led. Patrick rented prut of a house near the roof. On being asked whiuh it was, he replied," Shure, if the home wis just turned topsy turvy, it's the groujj floor I'd be living on." Mrs. Iibb is of such a ten ler dis position tbat before span'..ioa Billy bobbi, Sally Dobbs, anl Be.)i,y Dobha, she administers chloroform tu them. -They are of the unanimous :imon that this a large tuiprovciaeui ou tbeolj fmhiiio of apaokioj. . .. j. i , ,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers