Page 6 Ask Louanne Th£ Collegian's Advice Column by Dr. Louanne Barton Personal Counselor fR LL HELP Louanne has help for hurt heart Dear Louanne, I'm a basket case. My girlfriend left me after 2 1/2 years. She's seeing someone else and the guy's a real jerk. I can't believe it! I'll be graduating next year, and we were going to get married. Now nothing seems worth it anymore. I can't sleep, and I can't concentrate on studying. It's been two weeks and I still can't get on top of this. If this keeps up I won't even graduate. I'm not the greatest looking guy in the world and not very outgoing. The odds of my finding anyone else are pretty slim. I feel like I'm going crazy! Help! Dear Broken Hearted, There seems to be a run on broken hearts this past month. It's like the Saint Valentine's Day massacre. Someone once told me that's why they put Valentine's Day in February, to try to shore up relationships. At Pitt they even have a group for the broken hearted. What you're experiencing is a real crisis, one of the hardest to face in life. It's like grieving over the death of a loved one only harder because she's not really gone, seeing her keeps reminding you of pain, and there's always that shred of hope that maybe she’ll come back. We experience grief in stages which include denial, anger, depression, and guilt. Finally, we come to a kind of acceptance. At first it does feel like you're losing your mind with inability to concentrate and remember things, a tendency to think obsessively about the situation, and feeling the urge to cry all the time. Even suicidal thoughts can enter one's mind. We think such thoughts as "It must have been my fault," "What did I do wrong?" or "I'm a worthless person and I'll never find anyone else." This grief process takes time. No, you're not going crazy. What you are experiencing is normal in a situation like this. Allow yourself to experience and express these feelings. Believe it or not in time the pain will dull and a feeling of acceptance will take over. Don't be too hard on yourself if you can't concentrate on studying. Try studying shorter periods of time and take more breaks if you have to. When you feel better you can catch up. It helps to talk to friends or family. Keeping busy helps too. Structure your day so you don’t have too much time to sit home alone and think. As you begin to heal try treating yourself to some new experience, taking some risks. Do some of those things you always wanted to do, but didn't because of your girlfriend, especially those things which will help you meet new people. The important thing to remember is you can live to love again. Send letters to: Dr. Louanne Barton, Personal Counselor Counseling and Advising Center First floor Reed Building Signed, A Broken Heart Louanne The Collegian From The Hip There are worse things to be than happy A funny thing happened to me the other day. Someone accused me of being too happy. Well, maybe not actually being too happy, but writing too happily. But I guess you could look at it both ways. I think that's the first time I've ever heard something that funny. And, as a matter of fact, that ridiculous. In a depressed and trouble-filled, dying world, I really don't think someone can be too happy or write about things too happily. In medialand, where our newspapers and our newscasts are full of murder, rape, corruption, unemployment, recession, failure and suicide, I can't even begin to fathom how someone - anyone - can't appreciate something uplifting every once in awhile. Well, maybe I can. For some people it's just easier to hide underneath all of those black clouds. In a college where some of our peers are incessantly depressed, brooding over nonsense, complaining and moody, I can't even begin to grasp the statement that anything uttered could be too happy or anything written could be done too happily. I still can't stop laughing over this utterly hilarious statement. But I'd better stop my chuckling soon or my happy bug might spread to others and that could be disastrous! We sure don't need any more happy and positive people in this world. i ittutumuhttuiaittuMutiu HutmumiitinHiitiHittut him i itmttti m hi nuuMtatuawi News flash U 3 3 st I needs staff photographers, so if you’d like to pick up an extra credit and • you’ve got a 35 mm camera (or if you think you can at least operate ours) call us at 898-6488, or stop by our weekly meetings each Thursday = s illillllillllllHIIIIIIIMIIIIIIIilllltlimillWMNHII»IIHIII4HllimHltlHmi<lllllllllllltlllll|lilllllllltlllllftllllllllimilllllllllllllll!lllllltllllf|[|llllillll|llllllll1lllillMtllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll<t[|lllllllllllllllllll|lll|[(>llltt The Collegian in Turnbull 204. at 6:10 Thursday, February 20, 1992 Christi Luden, entertainment editor for The Collegian, has been known to answer to the name Ludenhouden fleugendouden. IMHNMHIIHIIUIIII|
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