r6 VOL. XII. NEW BLOOMFIELD, PA., TXJE 8DAY, AUGU8T27, 1878. NO. 35. (iff m . mwmm mm II - , sfife THE' TIMES. la Independent Family Newspaper, ; 18 PUBLISHED BVBRY TUBSDAY BT F. MORTIMER & CO. 8UBBCBIF11UK P It ICE. (WITHIN TDB COUNTY. One Year, Jl 2 Six Months 75 I (OUT 0 TUB COUNTY. .; .. Ons Yar, (Postage Included) 11 fO Bix Months, (Fostage Included) 83 Invariably In Advance I V Advertising rates furnished upon appli cation, x . gelec't Poeti'y. THE BOSS FOOL. The farmer roameth o'er bis fields, And gathereth In bis grain j But the farmer's son, all doubled up Doth bowl and loud complain ; The while, beneath his jacket, bo Doth bear a bitter pain. The farmer pauses in bis work, And on bis rake doth lean "Oh, I have roamed In man; lands, And many fools have seen ; Bat the boss of all the fools Is be Who eateth apples green !" GORMLEY'S ADVENTURE. A Story With a Moral. OLD HIRAM GORMLEY was an individual whom fortune had not forgotten in her distribution of the good things of this world. He had a line for tune, a magnificent dwelling, and a plump, good-cenipered wife. Moreover, he had a great reputation for sanctity and uprightness, and was an elder of the church to which he belonged. A very good man and a thorough christian old Hiram considered himself, for he had family prayers every morning, went to church every Sunday, and ; al lowed the cook to give all the uneatable scraps of bread which remained in the larder to any beggar who applied for them. . A judicious parent he considered himself to be, and a just one, for when his only daughter had married against his will he had cast her off forever, and refused to see her when she stood weak and trembling at his door to tell him that her husband lay upon the verge of death and that starvation stared them in the face. " As she has sowed so she must reap," he muttered, as he saw her turn away, hiding her grieved face in her shabby bonnet. "She might have had old Grimes and lived in clover and must abide by it." And, so saying, he went back to his account books and banished his daugh ter from his mind as soon as might be. Old Hiram Gromley was, I have said, very wealthy, but yet clung to trade with the utmost pertinacity. Money getting was his life, and he was never so happy as when making a bargain. Among other things he had speculated in flour, and had made more, perhaps, in that line of business than in any other. How old Hiram and his broth ers in the trade chuckled as the poor man's loaf decreased and the store of their own coffers t augmented, ia best known to themselves. It was at such a season that Hiram Gormley sat before his parlor fire, bask ing in its blaze and sinking gently into an after-dinner nap. His portly form filled the huge velvet chair, and his own portrait looked from its gilded frame upon its drowsy original with a blended dignity entirely of the artist's own in vention. Mrs. Gormley had gone out to dine, and the carriage was to be sent at an appointed hour, so that the old man and his portrait were alone togeth er in the comfortable room. 1 They were alone, at least for many minutes.' But as the silver-toned time piece rang out the hour of seven, the outer door was opened, and a small man, clad in a faded green velveteen coat, entered the room with the soft tread of a stealthy cat. He was a queer t. looking Individual, so withered, and wrinkled that he might have resembled eotue old goblin, and his white hair stood out, strangely enough, upon either side of his brown forehead. Upon his meager lower limbs he wore great, mud stained boots, a world too wide for him, and in his hand he carried a cap of the same color and material as his coat. He looked first at old Hiram and then at his portrait, then back again to the original and finally stepped forward and touched him on the shoulder. Hiram Gormley awoke with a start, and springing to his feet, regarded him with astonishment. " Who are you, and what do you want here ?" he asked,ln a manner sufficient ly imperative. " Who I am is a matter of no impor tance," replied the stranger ; " but I am here on business. I believe you are buy ing up flour?" " I am," replied old Hiram, becoming interested, and gracious in a moment. " Take a seat, slr,and let me understand your business." He pointed to a chair, and the visitor seated himself immediately, crossing his muddy boots and folding his elfin arms upon his bosom, as he bent down his head and peered from under his droop iug black brows straight into Hiram Gormley's face. " We have flour to sell," he said. " We V" said Hiram, Interrogatively. " I and my partner, or, more politely speaking, my partner and I," responded the little man of the firm. ' " I'd rather not mention names until I'm sure that we shall come to terms," continued the little man. " But let me tell you.Mr. Gormley ,that such a chance has never been offered to one man be fore. If you accept it bread will run up to such a price this year that a loaf of the better sort will be worth its weight in gold, and rich men will give great sums for what they now esteem as noth ing. How many barrels do you think we have on hand V" "How manyV" asked old Hiram, trembling with eagerness. The little man bent forward and whispered something in hia ear which made him start to his feet once more. "So many I" he cried. ',Why, the very speculators themselves will be at my feet. I shall be the richest man in the world. I'll buy it all-all, all! When can I see It 1 when can I sign the contract Be quick tell me where all the store is hidden " : " In our office," said the little man. " What office would contain such quantities ?" asked Hiram. "Hush!" whispered the little inan; " there is an underground passage and a cellar or vault capable of containing ten times what it now holds. As for the time, you may come with me to-night,lf you like ; all hours are the same to my partner and me." The words were scarcely out of his mouth ere Hiram Gormley had hurried on his overcoat, dashed his broad-brimmed hat over his eyes and seized his gold-headed cane with a nervous grasp of the right hand. ," Lead the way," he said; "lead the way; "I'd follow if you were going to the moon." The stranger only grinned and passed out of the door before him. At the gate stood a small vehicle,black as ink, and capable of containing only two persons. A small, elf-like pony was fastened to its shafts, and a little black boy held the reins. Hiram glanced doubtfully at the shabby turnout, but, in compliance to a nod from his fellow traveler, stepped in 'and took his seat beside him. If the .shabby pony was email apd unpromising , to look at,' he was nevertheless as fleet of foot as any race horse, and the dingy vehicle spun along at a rate which made old Hiram cling to the sides with both hands and shut his eyes that he might not grow giddy, until, passing from the village, it turned down the broad country road,and paused at the margin of a little piece of woodland. , '' ,. "Your office seems to be in a strange locality," muttered old Hiram auspi ciously. " Not at all," replied the little man in green ; " only we are going by the un derground way, so , as not to attract atj. tention. ', "Ah!" ea'id'old' Hiram; "well, this does seem to bean underground passage, sure enough I," for they . were turning now into a sort of cave, and only , one faint ray of light in the far distance saved them from being wrapped In utter darkness. "I shall be glad when I am safe home again," he added to himself. " How do I know where this man is taking me V" But even as lie spoke the distant light grew larger, and the carriage stopped at an iron-bound door with a grating at the top, through which fell a light, like that of a flame from the chimney of a pottery on a dark night. " This is our ofllce," said the little man in green ; and old Hiram followed him as he leaped from the crazy vehicle, which suddenly disappeared in a most mysterious manner. A rap at the door summoned a dark vlsaged man, who admitted them with out parley, and old Hiram Gormley stood in a veritable counting-house, tho most spacious which had ever met his eyes. He glanced down the rows of diligent clerks, all dressed in black, and all en gaged in making entries in immense iron-bound volumes; at the huge fire, which ho could see reflected on the roof through a wide grating in the distance, and which rendered anything in the way of lamps and candles unnecessary ; and then turned toward a tall, dark man, who strode toward him from the centre of the glowing light. He was clad in black, and his hair was bound together in an eld-fushtoned ciffe. There was a sort of a supple, snake-like ease in his movements, and his feet were cov ered with shoes that suggested either the gout or bunions. " Mr. Gormley," eald the little man in green, " Mr. Gormley, partner. He has come to inspect our stock of flour ; he'd like to buy it in." " He would like to buy it in would he V " said the new comer. "You are very welcome, Mr. Gormley. I have no doubt we shall come to terms. Gentle men , this is Mr. Hiram Gormley with whose name you are so well acquainted, and whom you have expected bo long." As he spoke the long rows of black clad clerks arose with one accord, and, bowing, turned upon him their hollow, blood-shot eyes.fllled with a light which must have been reflected from the fire beyond, it was so red and horrible. Old Hiram Gormley shuddered in voluntarily, as, addressing himself to tils two companions, he said : " Can I see this flour of which you have been speaking ?" " Certainly, sir," replied the taller of the three, as he flung open a narrow door to his right and beckoned Hiram to approach. " Light up, boys, light up!" And at the words a myriad of torches flared down a Beemlng-lntermlnable vista ; and Hiram, looked upon myriads and myriads of barrels, stretching away until they faded Into mere specks in the distance. " Full of flour, from the very first brand down to the poorest ; not another barrel left in the market. You can have the upper hand of the whole of them, Hiram Gormley ; when you can starve ten millions if you like to do so. Do you close the bargain, or shall we send for some one else V" "Hush! I agree. Tell me your terms!'! grasped old Hiram Gormley, nervously. , , " There are very easy," eald the tall man in black. " Sit down, if you please. Here is tho pen and paper, and the doc ument." Hiram seized the paper and conned it rapidly, growing white and cold as ho read on. At last he flung it from him and soreamed : " My soul ! Promise to give you my soul ! In the name of the fiend, who're you !" " Your humble servant," said the creature clad in black ; and old Hiram saw a cloven foot peeping from the queer boot and distinguished the per fume of brimstone. "Let me go!" he said. "Let me gor" ' Softly !" said the creature at his el bow. "Softly! why do you care so much for what you have already mort gaged! You-are half mine already;, do you know that V" "It is false! said old Hiram, "I cheat no man. I belong to the church, and I subscribed $50 to the missionaries a year ago.,7 ,, The durk man grinned contemptuous ly. " Bring me Mr. Gormley 'b box," he said. And he who had conveyed old Hiram to the spot where he now stood set upon the table a box like that in which law yers keep the papers of their clients, labeled, " Hiram Gormley, Esq." From the depths of this box he took a pile of parchment and read from thence : " A mortgage on the soul of Hiram Gormley, given on the day he turned his daughter from the door. Another, when he seized old widow Fotter's fur niture for rent. Another, when he took advantage of a flaw In the papers to evade payment of a Just debt of his own. Myriads when he first began bus iness, told fifty lies a day, and gave false weight and measure, and a tremendous mortgage for passing through the world without one loving, tender, sympathiz ing feeling for mankind. " Your soul bah I What is it worth now V" " I'll take it all back. I'll have my daughter and her husband home. I'll pny" " Too late !" said the dark creature. Too late, Gormley ; too late !" But the old man, stretching out his hands, screamed aloud in terror, and fell backwards in unconsciousness. When Mrs. Gormley returned from the dinner party she found her husband stretched out upon the hearth-rug, with a blue lump upon his forehead as large as a hen's egg. When he related his adventure she considered it a dream, and laid the blame upon the old port in the decanter on the sideboard; but dream or reality, it had a strange influence upon old Hiram, for in a week he was reconciled to his daugh ter, had ignored the flaw and made the settlement, performed various unwonted acts of charity, and was, in fact, an ut terly changed and altered man, while, singular to say, no earthly power has yet been able to induce Hiram Gorm ley to Invest in breadstuff's. A STORY OF A TOOTH. SOME months since sayB tho Oak land, Cal., Times one of the loveliest and inost accomplished daughters of a well-known resident was thrown froni her horse and sustained, among other annoying injuries, a fracture of one of her front teeth.' The delicate pearl whioh flashed through "lips within whose rosy labyrinth when Bhe smiled the soul was lost" was hopelessly crush ed, and marred the beauty of the lady considerably. The only remedy for its injury was to have the root of the bro ken tooth extracted and a false tooth made to fill the horrid breach ' in her mouth. In her distress she sought the advice of Dr. Geo. Luce. She had read some where or been told by somebody that dentistry had advanced to such a science that it was possible to transplant a tooth from the mouth of another person which would take root and bloom as it had in its original gum. Could he secure for her a match to the broken tooth ? If he could he might name his price. Beauty in distress ap peals to Dr. Luce never in vain, bo he informed the grief-stricken maiden that such operations had been successfully performed, but in the present case the difficulty would be to discover a tooth of such purity, delicacy and beauty as to be worthy to munch caramels and bonbons in company with those which now mourned the loss of their crushed companion. However, he. would see what he could do. A month or two passed. At last the tooth was found. A . young Spaniard, whose well brushed and somewhat faded habiliments Indicated a struggle with fate, entered the ofllce to receive some slight dental; attention. Ilia manners were those of a gentleman and his con versation denoted Intelligence and re finement. When he opened his mouth, the Doc tor could hardly conceal his emotion. There was the tooth he had been look ing for flashing in its. dazzling white ness, , the perfection of form and the acme of purity. , It was indeed a gem. The subject was approached cautiously, but when the young gentleman , spoke of fils poverty, the Doctor offered him one hundred dollars for the tooth. Tho money tempted the Impecunious for eigner, who immediately offered all his stock In trade on the Bame terms. An appointment waa made for the next day and a note dispatched to the lady informing her that at last the tooth was found. At the given hour the gen tleman entered the front office and the lady closely veiled shortly after entered the rear office, for it was a part of the bargain the gentleman was not to see the lady. The tooth was extracted, the money paid the Btrahger departed. Then the tooth was carefully cleansed and submit ted to a delicate treatment to preserve its. vitality, while the doctor was pre paring the mouth of the lady for Its re ception. It waa soon inserted and in the course of three or four hours had immovably taken root in its new home. In a few days the operation was pronounced a complete success, and Miss became the happiest of girls. Now for the sequel. With a woman's curiosity she was continually specula ting as to whom the tooth belonged, and the gentleman in turn was cudgelling his brains for some means to ascertain the whereabouts of his tooth which had turned the tide of his affairs bo luckily. For with the money it had brought him, he had made a fortunate purchase of stock, and step by step he had gone on with his rapidly accumulating capi tal until he had a snug little bank ac count and patronized a fashionable tailor. Chance threw him into a select little party one evening where Miss happened to be present and he com menced recounting his adventure. When he smiled and pointed to the va cant place in his mouth where the tooth had once had its home, Miss gave a little shriek and her secret was discover ed. It is rumored that out of this dental operation a veritable love match will shortly result; and in fashionable Oak land circles this romance of a tooth is just now the all-sorbing topic. Religion and Honesty. Is it not time to preach anew the ser mon of honesty ? First, to do justly, as if honesty was the ' foundation stone, then to love mercy, and then to walk humbly. There is too much one-sided religion. We know examples of zeal and Untiring energy, in Christian work, in men who so neglected their own affairs that they are always under a load of debt, and give honest unbelievers . a very poor opinion of a Christian man's business habits. !, Such things ought not to so be. We know people who are called lights and shining lights, who not only profess and call themselves Christiana.but do a great deal of real work, who are utterly un mindful Of pecuniary obligations, who " fail" when they can pay no longer, and yet learn nothing of the value of money, and are just as devout as if they were not dishonest. They are "unfortunate," true, but fortune implies chance, and there Is no chance In living within one's income and paying one's debts. Think of a published " Memoir" of a so-called Christian who, in our opinion, cheated trades-people and defrauded creditors, while he lived better than they, and bated no jot of his expenses,or charities. No wonder that many honest men are not believers. .They attend to their own affairs and are not always falling. We want a great many things in these days, more faith, more love, more self denial, more Chlrstian zeal; but for symmetry of character we want more downright honesty in men and women. To do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God, God help us. 1 Ungallant. A newly married man, who evidently needs discipline, thus discourses " A woman is a handy thing to have about the house. . She does not cost any more to keep than , you'll give her, and she'll take a great interest in you. If you go out at night, she'll be awake when you get home, and then shu'll tell you all about yourself, and more too., Of course she will know where you bare beennd what kept you out so late, and will tell you: yet right after she get through telling you that, she will ask you where you have been and what kept - you so late. And after you tell her,, and she won't believe you, you mustn't mind that ; and if, after going to bed, she eays she hasn't shut her eyes all night, and then keeps up the matinee two hours longer and won't go to sleep when she has a chance, you mustn't mind that, either ; it's her nature.
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