Ureeland Tribune Established 1883. PUBLISHED EVERY MONDAY AND THURSDAY, BY TUB TRIBUNE PRINTING COMPANY, Limited OryitE: MAIN STHEET ABOVE CENTBE. FUEELAND, PA. 8L T B.>Cltl*"riON KATES: One Yenr $1.50 Blx Months 75 Four Months 50 Two Months . .25 The date which the subscription is paid to Is on tne address label of each paper, the ohange of which to a subsequent date lie bomes a receipt for remittance. Keep the figures in advance of the preseut date. Re port promptly to this oflice whenever paper ts not received. Arrearages must be puid when subscription is discontinued. Ma/>e all nwmy orders, checks, etc.,payabU Co the Tribune Printing Company , Limited. If iron is king in the industrial world the ultimate supremacy of Ame- ica in manufacturing is clearly foreshadowed. An automobile has beaten a railroad train in a 220 mile l ace. /Jut, lhen.it was a continental train. They called it an express, but it made only a little over twenty miles uu hour. The St. Louis Republican observes: •'Cuba acts like a mother with u do. en marriageable daughters. Scarcely a day passes tli.it she does not demand to be informed concerning Uude •Sam's real intentions. Out in southern Kansas the gills have decided to remain single unless they can mary a "hero." As the sup ply of Kansas heroes is abundant, there is no reason why the marriage rate in Funston's state should do crease. An incident of the civilization of the red man is tliat he is developing insanity just as white folks do, and therefore the government has bought 100 acres of laud near Canton, S. D., whereupon to build an asylum to ac commodate all tho insane Indians of the United States. Indian Commis sioner Jones savs, however, tliatthere are no insaue Indians of pure race. The inmates of the new asylum will be half-breeds. Studying the direct causes of lires in the United States for the year, we tiud that there were 11 dust explo sions, 622 fires caused by electric wires aud lights, 500 caused by tire crackers, 1507 forest aud prairie fires, 205 caused by friction in machinery, 6S'JI ini eudiary tires, 3479 fires caused by lightning, 210 cause! by mischiev ous children, and 94 caused by natural ga y . Oil Btoves were responsible for 397 fires, open fireplaces for 410; sparks set 5200 fires,spontaneous combustiou caused 1179; there we e five fires caused by the sun's rays passiug through window glass, and one fire caused by the rays passing through a glass bottle; tramps set 755 tires, not incendiary, aud 12,204 lires had no assignable causes. The last Michigan Legislature passed a bill appropriating $2500 per year for a period of two years for the location and suppoi t of an agricultu ral experiment station at some point on the upper peninsula. In an inter view outlining tho ideas of the board in opening up the new station, the president of tho board, Mr- Snyder, said: "The conside: jtions as to the locality of the new station will be chiefly, and perhaps wholly, physical aud geographical. We desire to lo cate the station where it will do the greatest good to tho greatest number with the money at our command. I am of tho opinion that it will be best to tak* the minimnm amount of laud asd devote our experiments to the cul tivation of some one or two crops, rather than to attempt too great a va riety. In fact, you will tiud that sen timent, the sentiment of small farms thoroughly utilized, is very largely in favor with farmers throughout the state as opposed to the old theory of 160 acres with a little of this, that,and everything, and only about half the acreage utilized. Tho truth is, the far met s are themselves becoming very rapidly a well-educated class, not alone as to agriculture, horticulture, aud so forth, but in a general way." lioslington's Change of Mind. From the New York Sun: "I used to think," said Mr. Goslington, "what an infinitesimal ly small thing T was, Just a transient nothing upon a globe that is itself hut a microscopic grain of sand in the vastness of the universe. But I think differently now. ; haven't a big head, nor even the .".lightest ap proach to it, but I think what a great thing it is, even for the brief moment of our passing lives, to be any part whatever of the greatest of all tilings, that passes human understanding—the Illimitable." The Savoy Hotel, in Kansas City, has a dog that acts as bellboy, going for the mail and carrying notes to the clerk. BY FRANK LILLIE POLLOCK. . DOB son's (where I - wa9 staying) was four miles away—four miles _ of smooth Illi -?*'■ —|j} no ' s country - |(f- roads and I usually rode over TST—-jfir on my bicycle at =* about three /clock every afternoon for the mail. It was on these journeys that I cou oeiveil the idoa of utilizing wind power by meaua of a rail on my wheel. Almost every young cyclist has at tempted soinethiug of the sort, and my first attempts were no more suc cessful than the average. But after a few failures I improved in mechanical skill, and was not long in discovering that a bicycle is almost as snilnble us a boat. The lateen rig seemed to offer most advantages, and I strapped my mast, a six-foot bamboo, to the head of the machiuo so tightly as to muke stays unnecessary. On the 17th of June, 1898, it was hot—unbearably hot—aud it had been so for a week. It was by no means the sort of day one would select for bicycling, but 1 was especially anxious to go to the postoflice, aud in spite of sun and dust I mounted my wheel at half-past three and rode off. In half a mile I passed the country school-house, where my six-year-old sister Ethel was no doubt just then engaged in the perusal of the First Header. As she knew that I usually returned that way at about half-past four, she often waited for me after school, when the weather was tine, and she expected mo to mount her upon the saddle while I trundled the wheel, to her extreme satisfaction. "THE 'TWISTER' WAS CLOSING IN FAST." I had covered more than half the distance when I noticed that the clouds wore gathering dark and low in the west before me, with ragged streamers hanging out like danger signals in every direction. {Sud denly there was an agitation among these as if by tho action of a violent wind. They collected and darkened, aud I heard a dull, rushing sound apparently right over the roofs of the town u mile and a half ahead. In an instant a huge dark blue mass de tached itself, as it seemed, with a tremendous swirl aud swooped viciously toward tho earth. Thero was n moment's interval, and then i saw a cloud of solid objects fly up, whirling higher aud higher with fright ful rapidity—boards aud shingles and f heaves of wheat and miscel laneous small articles. Then tho whirlwind, after gyrating about inde cisively, lunged straight forward down the wind. I liar dismounted at the first ap pearance of the "twister," and I now turned tlio wlieel about with all haste, and, getting astride, commenced to flee for my life. The storm was not more than a mile and a quarter be hind me. 1 could not estimate its velocity, but I put my feet hard down on the pedals and "scorched" with tho utmost energy and enthusiasm. I found it vastly easier work than struggling in tlio teeth of the wind. 2so\v tho force was all at my back, and, with the howl of the oncoming storm as a stimulus, I achieved a sur prising rate of speed. The road was lovel and there was nothing to impede my course. In tho cautious side-glances which I could spare from my vigilant watch for rocks upon tlio track I beheld tho inhabitants of tho farmhouses along tho way standing in amazement and horror at my terrific pursuer, or run ning to right mid left to escape from its patn. I might have taken to the fields myself, but this would have necessitated abandoning my wheel, which would in all probability be badiy damaged by the cyclone. I did DO', foel any great alarm for my safety, for the next cross-road was only a quarter of a mile farther, and I knew that I could there turn aside ipd let. the mrnster oass, There was something exhilarating in this race with the storm, and I almost wished that it had lasted longer when I reached tho side-road and wheeled off to the right. Farther down the road I had left I could just see the roof of the schoolhouse, and the idea came to ino that it was fortunate that school had been dismissed. How I came to forget the existence of Ethel so completely I can not un derstand. The startlingly sudden ap pearance of the tornado seemed to have driven all thought of anything else from my mind. But I had not ridden fifty yards down the road to safety when the recollection of her habit of waiting for me flashed through my brain. It was almost certain that Bhe was there. Icould seem to see her standing expectantly by the road as I had so often overtaken her—in the very track of the whirlwind! It was unlikely that she would have suf ficient presence of mind to escape across tho fields, but wonld probably run before it to be infallibly swal lowed up. This idea darted through my mind before I could even check tho wheel. I sprang to the ground and looked back at the tornado. It hud gained upon me, and it seemed impossible that I could win the racototho school house. But there was nothing else to do and I did not waste time in thinking. Indeed, my whole action was less the result of conscious delib eration than of automatic impulse. I scarcely thought of my own personal risk, but swung tho whool around and struck out for the road I had just left. I was not many seconds in reaching it, but the hurricane was less than a mile behind, and the school a mile ahead, with the prospect of having to reach the next cross roads after pick ing up Ethel. The road was smooth. and I flashed down it at a tremendous rate, but not so rapidly as the storm, which I could feel to be creeping up. Tho wind at my back pushed mo onward, and it seemed only a few seconds before I reached tho school, alter all. As I approached I looked about for my sister; she was nowhere to bo seen. I was in an agony of des peration. I shouted and called, but tho wind behind drowned my voice. I dared not dismount to search for her. She might kavo hidden herself in the building, or she might have gone farther up the road. The latter hypo thesis proved to be correct. Just as I reached tho gate I saw the littlo blue dress about seventy-live yards beyond, whero she bad been partially con cealed by the fence. She was run ning as last as she eould, apparently crying, and looking back in a terrified manner, but she stopped when she beheld mv approach. I leaped off headlong at full speed, swung her astride the upper tube, and commanded her to grip the handle bars for dear life. In tea seconds we were off again, but eveu with this slight delay the sound of the tornado had come up louder aud nearer. It was gaining rapidly, and appeared not more than 200 yards behind. As I looked it encountered a groat barn, and with a ripping roar some hun dreds of shingles ascended into the air, still further deepeuing the som ber hue of tho gyrating body. The next cross-road was only half a milo ahead, but it was the freshly graveled one leading past our farm, and I could not turn upon it. It was consequently necessary to ride a full mile and a half before reaching an other. The additional weight on the machine told severely on my muscles, and I would gladly have taken to tho fields now, but Ethel was too heavy to bo curried, and she could not mus ter up sufficient speed on her own legs to evade tho fust approaching "twister." It was clear that the race could not last so. I had almost forgotten tho sail, snugly lashed to the mast before me, but the thought now came to me like an inspiration. I dared not dis mount to unfurl it, but I clutched the handle-bars with one hand and ner vously undid the ' >ts with tha other. The sail dropped and blew out, and I pulled taut the sheet. The effect was instantaneous. It was as if an additional and violent im pulse had been applied to tho ma chine, for it started off with a bound at a new rate of speed. The strong wind filled tho canvas like a balloon till the bamboo mast bent with the strain. Ethel said nothing and hung on like a heroine, while I had muoh difficulty iu keeping my hold on the pedals, being unprovided with too clips. At last I was compelled to put my feet upon the forks aud devote all my energy to the task of steering. The speed increased every moment. Once wo struck a stone and seemed to bound six feet before touch ing the road again, but I recovered my balunce after a frenzied wob ble. The sail obstructed my view of the road ahead, the weight on the front forks increased the difficulty of accurate steering, and as the high speed made the least movement of the handles produce a most surprising evolution, it was no easy matter to keep a straight course. The roar of the sail drowned the noise of the pursuing tornado, and I dared not turn my head. I fancied, however, that we were gaining; it seemed impossible that even a whirl wind could travel at a greater speed than our own headlong rush. Now and then I heard a crash as some liouse-roof or shed was demolished, but deadened as these souuds were, it was impossible to judge of their distance. On a sudden, however, a split shingle dropped beside my wheel aud startled me. At all risks I craned my nock about and looked back. The i sight I saw was terrifying. Tho black ! monster seemed to be towering right above my shoulders, though iu reality ; it must have been several hundred feet j in the rear. I had a glimpse of boards ! and all sorts of rubbish whirling high I in air, aloug with some fluttering I birds carried resistlessly round and ! round by the current. The roar ol the tornado was obvious enough now that my head was turnod toward it. The strong wind that ran immediately before the storm protected us in ac celerating our speed, aud I suppose this is the reason why we had not been sooner overtaken. But the "twister" was closing iu fast, and this could not avail us long. The next cross-roads were not far away, and all depended on being able to reach them. I could not improve matters by pedaling; to put my feet upon the whizzing pedals would only have hindered their revolution. J slackened the sheets a little and clutohed tho handles desperately—all I could do. The litho mast creaked; so did the boom. The wind grow more violent, but now seemed mingled with so many cross-currents that the sail flapped and wo began to lose speed. The cross-roads were not rnoro than a quarter of a mile distant. It would have been impossible to turn the corner at so high speed, so ] allowed the dangerous slackening to go on. Wo still seemed to fly like a Hash of light. But tho tornado was fearfully close aud could no longer be kept at ann'3 length, I saw the dust of my wheels sucked into the eddy and my hat suddenly went whirling after it. The turning point was very neai now, and I began to hope that we might yet make it. Whiz! whirr! we went, but I could almost feel the grip of tho whirlwind upon my hair. At last! The corner was reached; we rounded it with a terrific swing and dashed down the side-road—across tho route of tnc sweeping destruction. But to lose at tho very moment of ■ victory. Boards and shingles began to rain around us. A stick struck me on tho head and discon certed mo so that we struck a stouo and wobbled. At that crisis a large piece of plank dropped with n tremendous thump upon the front wheel.. The shock was too violent to be re sisted. I executed a wild plunge sideways from the saddle, alighting on my face in a bed of thistles. Ethel and the bicyclo tumbled together be side mo, and at that moment the hurricane arrived with a roar like an express train and gathered us iu. I have a confused recollection of being mixed up with the wheel, of endeavor ing to save Ethel of being banged about and whirled into the air, and then I lost consciousness. I was brought to myself by a cold rain falling in my face. I awoke iu n dazed state aud discovered myself lying 011 my back iu a muddy field, surrounded by all sorts of agricultural wreckage. I got up stiffly, feeling as if every bone in my body were broken, but with the exception of a bleeding cut on my head no particular damage seemed to liavo been incurred, after all. The cyclone had passed on, and I could see it gyrating and swirling in the distance, but it already seemed to be growing smaller and less violent. A chill drizzle of rain was falling in its wake, and its track could bo traced for miles by roofless barns, demol ished trees and scattered fences. When my senses had fully returned my first act wa3 to look about anx iously fcr Ethel. She was sitting in a paddle of dirty water fifty yards away, and was wiping the mud from her face with so bewildered and lugu brious an expression that I burst iuto a fit of nervous laughter. Dirt for tunately provod to be almost the only barm she had received, aside from a few unimportant bruises aud a general shaking up. My whoel had not fared so well as its riders. I found it among a number of fence posts, with tho upper tube broken squarely across, the bandlo bars bent aud several spokes smashed. Of the mast and sail only a stamp remained. However, I considered it most for tunate that we had come off so cheap ly, and we made our painful way home on foot.—The New Yoice. I NEWS AND NOTES § | FOR WOMEN. I Koyul Women Under Plain Names. When the Princess of Wales was in Borne recently she passed incognita as "Mrs. Smith." Under this excel lent disguise of names she and her laughter dined at a restaurant, taking their turn at being served uud having K good time generally. The late Em-, press of Austria became "Mrs. Nich olson, of England," \\J\eu she wanted to be free from people's various atten tion. Her usual title for loss pro nounced incognito travels was Count ess of Hohenembs. Queen Victoria, on the rare occasions when she drops her own title, assumes tho name Count ess of Balmoral. New Nhttile of Gloves. Truly heroic efforts have been made in the present season to down the white glove, and enforce the adoption of a more serviceable, less expensive lux ury, aud a number of women persist in wearing gray castor beaver for all save social occasions of distinct for mality. The smart new gray glove is heavily stitched iu white, has in place of buttous a puckered elastic wrist, and the three-inch length on the wrist , folds back, as far as the base of the thumb, in a widish cuff. A revival has been successfully carried out in fuvor of the biarritz sack glove, than which there never was a more com fortable band covering ever invented. Selecting Becoming Stocks. Few women exercise auy mental ability over the selection of their stocks. If they know in a vague way j that pink is becoming to them tbey [Often buy at random any shade the salesman offers. Any shade of pink for an entire gown may have tho de sired effect, while a small strip of the same color directly under the chin would have a very different one. Blondes will lind the morning glory pink, a pinkish lavender, cream white, a golden yellow and cardinal the most becoming colors for stocks. Brunottes can best wear dead white, deep rose pink, turquoise blue, bluish heliotrope and burnt orange. Young Woman ltuns a Mill. Miss Clara M. Stimson is a young woman of Maine, who has shown that a woman can run a shingle mill with profit and satisfaction to her em ployes. She is now assisted in her work by another woman, who is a lecturer uud reformer, cultured and traveled, but able to put into her work real busi ness effort and ability. Miss Stim son's lather was the owner of a shingle mill, and when he died, ten years ago, the daughter determined to keep on with the mill. She has succeeded beyond lier expectations, and now lias customers all ovor the country. Her mill is at Masardis, in the heart of the lumber district. The machinery that went into the building Miss Stimson herself bargaiued for, mak ing better arrangements, it is said, than any man lmd done in that coun try before. She is successful at the markets iu Boston and New York, aud visits them regularly, and she says contractors and laborers are al ways equally courteous to her. Collar mill llelt llucklea. So many dainty little devices are necessary now in the way of jewelry that it would be hard for most people if it were not for the importation of the imitation jewelry, that is so ex tremely attractive nowadays. Tho newest effects are in the belt and neck buckles wora with the al most too popular shirt waists. Just how to finish a shirt waist at the throat and belt is always a problem, particularly if a woman is inclined to be stout. Tire broad belt and the high stock collar ure all very well for slight young girls, but as Bhirt waists are supposed to be correct for older women, it is time that somothing else was found to make them possible. The new style of wearing a belt made of a piece of soft satin ribbon quite wide, and then putting the ends of the ribbon into the buckle, is a very satisfactory fashion. The ribbon is soft enough to draw down at the hack, where it can be fastened to the Bkirt, thus avoiding the ugly gaping apart of skirt aud waist. The buckle, quite a small one, cau be iu silver studded with precious stones, or in enamel, oxidized silver, or fire gilt. The dosigns are charming, and the buckles most expensive. These waist buckles, however, are not so fascinat ing as the neck buckles, which fasten a soft ribbon just at the throat. The idea is to have a piece of ribbon from two to four inches iu width and three quarters of a yard iu length, or even longer if necessary, so that it will go around the neck twice. The ends are put into this small buckle, wbioh is worn just at the throat; a little bow of lace being put on underneath. The prettiest buckles are very small, and are of gilt, sometimes studded with jewels. They look par ticularly well with tho white peau de noio ribbons. This style of neck wear is quite the coolest aud most comfortable yet iuveuted. It is very attractive whou the neck and belt buckles match, but there is no law that tbey should bo iu otio aud the same design.—Harper's Bazar. Dairying as Women's YVork. Eady Vernou, who is the daughter of the tenth Karl of Haddington, is deeply interested in agricultural em ployment for women. In order thor oughly to inform herself on this sub ject she spent sometime in Normandy studying the methods of cheesemak icg. Her article is as follows: Dairying iu all its brauehes is pre eminently women's work, and it would in many ways be better if more of the charge of the cows and calves, as well as the actual dairy work, was in the bands of women The question of the great difficulty of obtaining good milkers would be easily solved if in England, as in Scotland and Wales, women were employed, and encour agement should bo given to this work by County Councils. I am often asked, Can dairying be made to pay? and without hesitation I can answer in the affirmative. The branch of dairy work to be adopted must to a great extent depend upon the Position of the farm. If near a town, then milk selling is most profit able, but this has its disadvantages and expenses, and probably the most paying lino of work is a combination of butter and cheese making, with a home sale of surplus milk. I strongly urge cheesemaking; not the common kinds, but the smaller make of Eng lish cheeses, and also the various kinds of French and cream cheeses. There are now several schools in England where theprocess of this sort of cheesemaking is taught, but to learn the art in perfection I advise a short stay in Normandy at some of the splendid dairy farms that are to be found there, for nowhere else can so thoroughly be learned the important secrets of the care needed in the vari ous temperatures required by cheese in its different stages. If butter making is taken up as the chosen work of the dairy, the three great points to be remembered, and which require a mistress' care, are, first, the feeding of the cows—that only the sweetest and best food is given; then, to secure really uniform quality of butter,use a separator; and, above all else, let perfect cleanliness be the rule of the dairy and cowsheds. It would bo a great thing for the fu ture of butter if the milk from all small dairies were sent to large fac tories. As it is, from the small dairies with tueir two or three cows much of the bad butter comes. It is to be wished that there was a keener interest among women in the interesting and healthful work of the dairy farm. (losftip. America has 4,000,000 working women. Russia has twenty-nine women phar macists. The Princess of Naples is said to bo the most beautiful member of a reign ing family. France employs over 5000 women in her civil service, telephone and telegraph offices. Mrs. May Preston Slosson has been | appointed Chaplain of the Wyoming | State Penitentiary at Laramie. The Princess of Wales has made such a loving hobby of music that she plays with much skill the piano, liar inouium and zither. Mrs. Tower, the wife of the Ameri can Ambassador, has the reputation of ! being out of the best gowned women at the Russian court. Mifts Cree Stanley is the first woman member of the Sidney (Australia) Trade and Labor Council, being the delegate of the Female Employe Union, The women who have interested themselves in the case of Mrs. May brick are greatly disappointed that ' Mr. Choate had failed to obtain favor able action on her case. The National Council of Women of ! Holland is now fully organized, hav- ' iug adopted a constitution and by-laws and elected officers. Mrs. Klerck van Hogendorp is President. Mme. Melba caught cold at a boat ing-party on the Thames not long ago rtud had to give up singing at Mrs. Ogden Goelet'a party, where she was to have been paid &2000. Queen Wilhelmina of Holland has received from the Dutch journalists ' live large bound volumes containing all the accounts of her cornation that were written by the foreign journalist* who attended it. The first Irish woman to be elected ! a municipal councilor is Mrs. Maurice 1 Dockroll, who was third in the poll? in the Blackrock district of County Dublin at the last elections, with niut ; vacancies to be filled. Five women, Clara Barton, Anua Bouligny, Margaret Chauler, Annie Wheeler anil Helen M. Gould have received the thanks of Congress foi their valuable services in the cuuse ol mercy in the late war. It appears that Miss Enid Yandell is not the only woman sculptor membei of the National Sculpture Society. In addition to Miss Yandell the society includes Mrs. H. H. Kitson, of Bos tou, and Miss Bessie Potter, who, like Miss Yandell, now lives in New York. OlciinlncH From the Shops. Travelers' safety pockets made of chamois and fastened with a patent clasp. Gray silk opera-glass cases and shopping bags showing effective stoe! headings. Ornaments for the hair made of very small feathers spaugled delicately with silver or gold. Broad showings of cycling outfits, as well as all kinds of leather goods for travelers' use. Tiny watches with watteau cases having the dial surrounded with small pearls or rhiuestoues. White chiffon parasols showing dif ferent arrangements of fine black chantilly lace inserting. Novelties in feather boa clasps made of gilt, silver and gun metal set with pearls, rhinestones and other jewela. Numberless wired ribbon and vel vet bows for the hair distributed throughout the ribbon stock as sug gestions for use. Fluffy parasols covered with chiffon plaitiugs in contrast, having handles of crystal or pearl incrusted with deli cate silver filigree.—Dry Goods Econo mist. IN AN OLD_MEADOW. How oft the housewife crossed this meadoTt wide To gather healing plants, In sweet oftfi days! Stooping along the tangled, stony stde, Where flourished herbs, and weeds, and briery sprays. Within her basket, wove of birchen bark, tihe laid faint-scented plumes of golden* rod, And slender culms of rushes, jointed dnrk, And mallow leaves, close growing to the sod. In dim, damp nooks, the bitter boneset grew For her. and comfrey, with its roots ol black; And tufts of fragrant pennyroyal blew Above the ribwort plantain in her track. Pale catmint spikes she found in sunny spots, And tansy leaves, like notched and heavy luce; Andwcol rosets, with buds In golden knots, Where shafts of mullein rocked with lazy grace. Green mustard pods, and yellow roots ol yarrow, She took, with hoarhound's square and rugged stems; Then softly mused, "I'll come again to morrow!" And homeward went beside the meadow hems. —New York Independent. HUMOR OF THE DAY. He—"Can you keep a secret?" She "Of course I can." He—"So can L"—New York Journal. He—"What are you two girls talk ing about?" She—"Nothing; are ! your ears burning?"—Yonkers States i man. j Ada—"llo has more money thar brains, hasn't he?" Clara—"Oh, yes'j He isn't absolutely penniless. | Puck. | "Curipus, isn't it, how his features are always moving?" "Yes. Perhaps that accounts for his having such u vacant expression."—Ally Sloper. "See a pin and pick it up All the day you'll liavo good luck;'' Don't you do ill Let it lie!— Lest of lockjaw "germs" you die. —The Criterion. When a married woman does not I tell of troubles she is compelled to endure, the other women believe sho is suffering in secret.—Atchison Globe. "He isn't even friendly with the girl he was engaged to, is he?" "No. When she sent the ring back she labeled the box 'Glass—with care.'" —Life. The Bride (rapturously) "Oh, .Tack! isn't everything just, lovely!" j The Groom (devotedly)—" Yes, darling —and aren't you and T. just every- I thing?"— Brooklyn Life. I "isn't SanTotnasan English town?" : asked Van Braani. "Of course not," j said Dinwiddie. "It's a Philippine ! town. What made you ask if it was ! English?" "I noticed that the 'h'had I been dropped." "So you liked my play, Miss Wil bur?" said Pcnriffhr, witii aself-satis : lied smirk. "Very muck," replied the young woman. "The waits be tween the nets were so loug and rest ful."— Harper's Bazar. Fond Mother (listening to baby's cries) —"What a sweet-toned voico she has, dear. She'll he a splendid singer. !We must send her to Italy and have her voice cultivated." Brutal Father | —"Send her now."—Tit-Bits. | He had been studying a new bank ! ruptcy law. "It's cheaper to fail than |to pay bills," he said at last. "Not always," was the reply. "Not if you get hold of a high-priced lawyer, for instance."—Washington Star. Lady Visitor—"Would you not give tho biggest half of your candy to your little sister?" Little Ralph Waldo— "I would not." Lady Visitor—"Why not?" Little Ralph Waldo—"Be cause two halves of the same whole are equal."—Puck. "What's the matter?" asked the Congressman of his constituent. "1 got you a Government job, didn't IV" "Yes." "Anil the salary is satis factory, isn't it?" "Oh, yes, the salary's all right, but, hang it all, they expect me to earn it."—Chicago Post. An AbHmit-Mimlttd ISrhlofgroom. Robert Dewar, brother of Lord William Dewar, tbo British scientist who was the lirst experimenter to liquefy air, ia a remarkably absent minded man. It is said that on one occasion ho left his homo early one morning and repaired to the house ol friend, in which there was a tine li. brary to which he hod access. That afternoon hiß relatives and friends searched tho neighborhood in vain for liim. At length he was run down in this library. By his side was a new suit of clothes. "It's a nice man you aro," ironical ly said the spokesman. "What's the matternow?" returned Robert irritably. "Your bride and tho preacher are waiting for yon this two hours. Don't yon know this is your wedding dly, man?" "I declare," said tho groom, "I'd forgotten all about it! Wait till I dress and I'll go along with you."— Philadelphia Saturday Evening Post, Tho "Ciuldlo." An adjunct of the royal game of golf, even as important in his way as ths olubs, is the "caddie." This is the individual who oarries the bag com taining the sticks and locates, for the player whose caddie he is, the hall after itlias been struck. Each player, as a rule, is aooomi<anied by a caddie, but this is not neoessary and this as sistant is often dispensed with from motives of eoonomy. Their rate ol pay is generally fifteen cents for nine holes and twenty-five cents for eight een. In anoient days and even in the old oountry at the presant day, ths oaddie is himself s player and gener ally a professional who has spent his life oaddying, olubmaking, and tourna ment .playing.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers