SULLIVAN JSBm REPUBLICAN; W. M. CHENEY, Publisher. VOL. XI. I eading German generals predict a big war in Europe at an early day. ' Professor Huxley knows of no a priori reason "why snake-bodied reptiles fifty feet long and upward should not disport themselves in our seal as they did in thos^of- the cretaceous epoch." i A National literature on roads is grad ually jgrowing up in this country, and the Pifaburg Dispatch thinks the sub ject should be given a prominent place in public school education in consonance with importance. ' It is probable, predicts the San Fran cisco Chronicle, that the device for dis pensing with the services of telegraph operators will fcc like the machine for sotting type. Human ingenuity can go a long way, but it cannot furnish brains, and brains are very essential in telegra ph - According to the Courier-Journal the great scramble for gold is now regarded in Europe as a sign that European peace is soon to be broken. Gold is not only being locked up in the Imperial Treasury of Russia, but in storehouses of other continental Governments, and the feel ing of anxiety on this account is wide spread. A Presidential inauguration costs less than an ordinary Congressional funeral. The total cost of President Harrison's inauguration was $2520.50. The «ost of a funeral varies from SSOOO to any thing you please, according to the dis tance over which the Congressional mourners meander and the greed of local undertakers and livery stable keep ers. This country is now building first class war ships at lower prices than the war ships of England are now costing. The Boston Cultivator boasts that we "make ships, too, equal to any that English navy yards turn out. Perhaps our methods of shipbuilding have less red tape and corruption about them. Our Government is in most points run ifar less expensively than any monarchy in Europe, and iu the lighter taxation which the people of this country pay is one of the causes of our greater pros perity. " Charles Mohr, of the United States Forestry Bureau, has an article in the Engineering Magazine, which demands the attention of Southern legislators. He says stupendous as the timber resources of the South appear, it can but be evi dent to anyone conversant with the facts that we have entered already upon an era involving their complete extinction, and he vividly points out the threatening cal amities that will follow the disappearance of jur forests, not only in the extinction of one of the South's important indus tries, but in the climatic changes that are already, perhaps, beginning to make themselves felt. Persons who are inciiDed to take a gloomy view of pauperism and crime in New York, would do well, suggests the News, of that city, to glance at the of ficial reports of the municipality of Lon don. The two years ending January 1, 1891, the date of the last biennial re port, the cost of maintaing the paupers of London was £2,340,000, the equiva lent of about $11,700*,000. During the two years there were 109,748 criminal convictions. Wuilo these figures show that the percentage of crime and pauper ism in London greatly exceeds that of New York, the same report indicates a much lower percentage of attendance in the public schools. A story from the Pall Mall Gazette was recently printed in the New York Tri bune, to the effect that the great com parative anatomist, Sir Richard Owen, identified as a pig's thigh-bone an osse ous specimen sent him for that purpose by Lord John Russoll, who afterward— so it was stated—declared that it came from what purported to be a bear's ham presented by President Buchanan of the United States. The Minneapolis Tri bund, ignoring the possibility of a sub stitution iu transit, ask: "Did our ante bellum President willfully deceive Lord John, was the eminent comparative an atomist at fault for once, or has the Pall Mall Gazette a talented liar on its staff?" Within the past two years a number of reefs and islands in the Pacific Ocean, long known to mariners, have disap peared from view, leaving no evidence that they ever existed. No one under stands the phenomenon, unless it be that here and there the floor of the ocean has subsided with unusual rapidity, though uot with such violence as to be betrayed by the agitation of the sea. The fact is simply known that these stretches of reef or bits of land, soine of them rising from the depths, and all marked on the charts, can no longer bo fouud. Oneortwo war ships, with orders to visit some of these places, have cruisel around in great be wilderment, unable to rind the objects of their q.iest. The Sunday-School Magazine, of Philadelphia, says that while San Fran cisco has a population of 300,000, its churches will seat only 55,000 people. Oklahoma has just adopted a code of maritime laws. The Atlanta Constitu tion avers that there is not a body of water in the Territory over a foot deep. With a population of 215,000, Mon treal has a debt of $19,000,000, or SBB per head. Little wonder, comments the San Francisco Examiner, that Cana dians should be crossing the border. It must be cheaper to move than pay taxes. The St. Louis Republic takes no stock in the theory of the overproduction of cotton. It says that when the Southern farmers raise all their foodstuff they can not produce too much cotton. But the trouble is that they will not raise all their foodstuff for a long time to come. A Denver boarder made disparaging remarks about the cooking set before him, and much to his amusement the landlady sued him for (20,000. His merriment died away when the jury brought in a verdict for $750, and he has putin his time since in wondering what there ever was in the episode to strike him as humorous. Pork is dearer now .than it has been in ten years, or since Bismarck began to make war on the American bog. This is doubtless in part due to the opening of European markets to our pork. With better prices for pork beans have also advanced, and the traditional New Eng land dish of pork and beans has now to be paid for by those who would enjoy it. The London Graphic haP a portrait and sketch of Potara, a Maori cannibal, who is eighty-five years old and still has a good set of natural teeth. He has not eaten a white man since 1816. He speaks well of white folks, but for a steady diet prefers a Maori, as the whites, or "Pakehas," have "a salty and bitter flavor." Potara must have a re tentive memory of his tastes. The statement published by the New York Sun of Consul Roosevelt at Brussels that it has been found profitable to ship cargoes of horse meat from this city to Belgium to supply the tables of the poorer classes may be news to most New York ers. A good horsesteak is not unpalat able, and though its edibility was dis covered rather late in the day, thousands of working people in Europe are now glad to pay a little over six cants a pound for it. Beef is entirely beyond their means, and so is the varied bill of fare that most working people in this favored land enjoy every day. In the opinion of the Chicago Herald "the criminal art gallery is the worst fruit that has been produced by grafting civilization en barbarism. It is bad enough to have the portrait of a convict ed felon placed on exhibition for all the world to see, even after he shall have expiated his crime by serving his term of imprisonment. If he should desire to return to honest life the ineffaceable lines of his countenance in the pictures of the rogues' gallery are a standing and damning imputation against him. Either there should be no rogues' gal lery, or every rogue, whether under po lice protection or not, should have a piace in the spectacular display of por traits." Italy expends every year $96,000,000 for her soldiers, and less than $4,000,000 for schools. In Spain it costs $100,000,- 000 to main the army, and only $1,500,- 000 to educate the children; but then, it is the exception to find a Spanish farmer who is able to read or write. Germany boasts of being in the foremost rank among the Nations in the Kulturkampf of the world; yet she expends $185,- 000,000 on her army, while $10,000,000 is deemed sufficient for the education of her children. France maintains an army at an expense of $151,000,000 and sup poi ts her schools with $21,000,000. The United States expend $115,000,000 for public schools, while the army and navy cost only $54,000,000. Every one that has observed the treat ment of private soldiers in European ar mies knows how like cattle they are re garded. Not long ago, relatea the Buf lalo Courier, a saddle race was arranged between officers of the Austrian and Prussian armies, the course lying from Vienna to Berlin. ▲ number of horses were killed in this trial of endurance. Recently the Austrian Government has been drilling soldiers in the field, with the thermometer at eighteen below sero, in order to test the relative endurance of the Austrians, Hungarians, and Poles in tue service. In determining this point to the satisfaction of the Government, 1144 soldiers had their hands or feet badly frozen. These things are not likely to lessen the stream of emigration to America. LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, MARCH 24,1893. MORNING OP THE DISCOVERY. Immortal Morn, all hail, That saw Columbus sail By faith alone. The skies before him bowed, Back rolled the ocean proud. And every lifting cloud I With glory shone! Fair Science then was born On that celestial morn, Faith dared the sea. Triumphant o'er her foes, Then Truth immortal rose New Heavens to disclose And Earth to freel Strong Freedom then came forth To liberate the earth And crown the right. So walked the pilot bold Upon the sea of gold, And darkness backward rolled, And there was light! Sweep, sweep across the seas, Ye rolling jubilees, Grand chorals raise; The world adoring stands, And with uplifted hands Offers from all the lands To God its praise! Ye hosts of Faith, sing on; The victories ye have won Shall time increase, And like t e choral strain That fell on Bethlehem's plain, Inspire the perfect reign Of Love and Peace! —H. Butter worth, in Home and Country. "Cousin" FREU" BY AMY RANDOLPH. T was a stormy twi *v iS> V light in February, the air full of the dreary atmosphere of BUMv/I newly fallen snow, jmtWy.Ki Je huge pine trees of the northern SSy*|'2Ld wood? writhing them- Ju.^7 selves about like giants In extremis, Maryville /TOWi'' stage had just come £ in with two passen gers. Ladies, both of them; ODe, apparently thirty years old, the other, scarcely sev enteen; and as they sat there warming themselves by the hotel fire, the landlord touched his wife's shoulder, and whis pered to her: "Furriners!" For there was something in the cut of their curious fur lined draperies, the shape of their neat crape hats, the very way in which they unconsciously carried themselves, which was as foreign as the Marseillaise itself, although there was no accent in their voices as they ques tioned whether any conveyance from Barnet Hill had been sent to meet them. And the landlord was right; for Gene vieve and Genevra Ballace wore the daughters of American parentage, born in sunny France. Orphaned and alone, they were coming to America to claim the protjetion of a relative of their mothers, "Cousin Fred," as they had been taught to call him. "Do you suppose he will be good to us?" Genevra, the dimpled seventeen year-older, asked, as she sat with her cheek against Genevieve's shoulder. "I hope so, darling," said the elder sister. "No one but a brute could be unkind to you." For little golden haired, rose lipped Genevra was one of those human sun beams who take every heart by storm, and in her deep mourning, she looked even sweeter and more attractive than her ordinary wont. And dark eyed Genevieve, thirteen years- older than her sister, bad long ago unselfishly put aside her own personality and identified her self entirely with the household pet and beauty. "I wonder if he is a cross old crab," pondered Genevra, as she drank the tea brought to her by the landlady, and basked in the welcome warmth of the blazing logs, "or a whimsical old bachel or, full of caprices. Oh, Genevieve! Don't you dread to meet him!" Genevieve smiled. "Little one," said she, "don't fret. Whatever happens, we shall be together, and—" But just then, the landlord came bust ling in. "The double sleigh from Barnet Hill, ladies," he said, rubbing his hauds. "And Mr. Barnet himself has come." Close on the landlord's words came Mr. Barnet, of Barnet Hill, a tall, hand some man of about thirty, with bright brown hair clustering over a noble fore head, keen black eyes and features clear and perfect as those of the Apollo Belvi dere. "Are these my cousins?" he said, pleasantly. "You are welcome to Bar net, Genevieve and Genevra." Instinctively, little Genevra put her hand to her disheveled curls. Had she expected to see any one but a wrinkled old sexagenarian, she would have taken more pains with her toilet. But Gene vieve rose and smilingly put her hand into the extended palm of her cousin. It was a long, snowy drive to Barnet Hill, but Genevra declared, joyously, that it was worth it all, when they were ushered into the great, old fashioned drawing room with its blazing cannel coal fires, its yellow satin curtains and the moss-soft carpet on which the foot fall made no sound. "Do you know," said Cousin Fred, laughing, "that I was expecting to see two little school girls in short frocks and thick boots!" "And do you know," retorted Genev ra, "that our minds were fully prepared to behold a rheumatic old gentleman with a crutch?" And in fifteen minutes they were cn the footing of old friends. But they had scarcely lived six months at Barnet Hill before the inevitable "little cloud like a man's hand" arose on their atmosphere. "Genevieve," said Mr. Barnet, rather gravely, one day."l wish you would warn dear little Gypsy against that Captain Allaire. He's a pleasant, amus ing fellow, I know; but he's scarcely the person I should select for any girl'* husband." "Yes, Cousin Fred, I will speak to her," said Genevieve, sighing softly as she wondered what spell Genevra pos sessed to win all hearts to herself, from stately Cousin Fred to the handsome dashing young captain of artillery. "But have you reasoned with her on the subject?" "Half a dozen times," said Barnet. "But she only laughs at me." Genevieve was silent. She wondered if popular rumor was correct, and Frederic Barnet really did love little Genevra so hopelessly so dearly. Genevrft came home late that eveuing in the rosy sunset, with scarlet wild flowers in her hair. "I have been to the village," she said, "with Captain Allaire." "Oh, Genevra!" pleaded the elder sis ter. "When Fied thinks—" "I don't care what Fred thinks," in terrupted the beauty, with a toss of her head. "Listen, Genevieve, I have a secret to tell you; I was married to Captain Al laire this afternoon! "'Married!'" echoed Genevieve. "Oh, Genevra!" "Look at my wedding ring," said the wild little gypsy, holding up her pretty, taper finger. "Yes, married—really and actually married! I am Mrs. Allaire now," with an amusing assumption of matronly dignity. "But Cousin Fred—" "Cousin Fred may help himself if be can," said Genevra, audaciously. "Per haps yon don't know, Jenny, that Cousin Fred himself means to be married very soon. Genevieve turned pale. "Genevra!" cried she. "You can't mean that?" "Poor little Genevieve 1" consoled Genevra. "But you will not lose your home. You must come and live with me and Charley." "I could not do that," said Genevieve, giddy and confused with the unexpected succession of startling news, "I—l must look out for a situation in some school or as companion or nursery gov erness! But oh, Genevra, are you quite sure about Fred!" "I heard the old housekeeper talking to the coachman, when I was waiting, down behind the shrubbery, for Captain Allaire to come," said Genevra, with a nod of her pretty head. "She said he had told her himsell and had instructed her what rooms to prepare and what al terations to make in the household ar rangements, for his coming marriage." "I wonder who it can be," said Gene vieve, sadly. "Miss Hilyard, of toui-se," said Gea evra, "or else that beautiful Mrs. St. Dean. Bat the least thing he could have done was to have confided in us, I think, and that's one reason I decided to elope. And Charley is coming up this evening, and we are to take the train to St. Vincent, and, oh, dear Jenny," with a burst of sparkling tears, "the world is so full of happiness to rae I" And Genevieve could but caress the beautiful, willful young creature who had tak&n life's helm so recklessly into her bands, and hope, in a choking voice, that she might be very, very happy. Cousin Fred listened very philosophic ally to Genevra's confession, half an hour later. "Married, are you!" said ho. "Well, if you had asked my advice, I should have given a cuntray verdict. But, as you didn't consult me, why, I shall havo to be like, the 'heavy fathers' on the stage and give you my blessing. Allaire is a clever fellow enough, although he has been very gay, and I hope you will steady him down, at last." So, the newly married pair went away, as thoughtlessly happy as two school children out for a picnic, and Genevieve was left alone with Fred, to wonder bow she could best break to him the resolu tion at which she had arrived. For she knew thai she could never remain at the Hill when beautiful Mrs. St. Dean or Alicia Hilyard should either of them be the mistress there. "It would kill me," she thought, clasping her hands. "Yes, it would kill mel" Mr. Barnet had turned kindly to her, and led her to a seat beside the win dow. "You are pale, Genevieve," be said. "Your hands are as cold as ice. Surely, you do not take this mad freak ol little Gypsy's so bitterly to heart! Never fear for her; she's a butterfly who will sip honey from all life's garden ground. Her nature is light and Jrothy; far dif ferent, Genevieve, from yours. Sit down, little cousin; I have much to say to you." "Now," thought poor Genevieve, with her color changing from scarlet to white—"now it is coming! I shall be politely dismissed from the only home I have!" And a sensation of indescribable lone liness passed through her heart as she pictured Genevra radiantly happy with her captain of artillery, Cousin Fred secure in the love of some stately and beautiful woman, herself only left out in the cold of life's dreariest vale, an un loved and solitary old maid. But she spoke nothing of all these sickening fears; only looked at him, with wistful dark eyes, in silence. "Genevieve," said he, "do you think it would be a wild and foolish dream for me to think of marriage?" "You? Oh, no," she answered, try ing to smile. "But I am three and thirty." "You are only in the prime and full ness of life," she responded—"for a man. With women," sighing softly, "everything is so different. But, Cousin Fred, if you really intend marry ing—" "I really do," he said, smiling gravely. "Then I shall not bo longer in your way," she said valiantly. "I will leave Barnet Hill at once." "But thit's just what I don't want you to do, Genevieve," he said, with her hand still closely held in his. "Dear, solemn little woman, is it possible that you don't comprehend what I mean?" "You think," with a startled look, "that I can be useful about the house?" "Must I say it in go many words, Genevieve," be asked) "Shall I go lown on my knees, like' the heroes of romance, and say: 'Sweetheart, will you be my wife?'" Genevieve started to her feet in a panic. "Do you really mean me!" cried Gen evieve. "I really mean—you," he said, reso lutely, holding her fast, when she would have flown from him. "Little girl, then you never have suspected how dearly I love you I" And Genevieve, clasping both bands over her eyes, could scarcely persuade herself that all this was not a dream, a beautiful, blissful yet baseless dream. Mrs. St. Dean was no longer a rival! She had nothing to fear from Alicia Hilyard I Cousin Fred loved her, and her alone I Cousin Fred had always loved her! So they were married; and whe#Gen evra knew it she cried out, laughing: "Well, there is hope for the oldest of old maids, now that our Jenny is mar ried !" For this seventeen-year-old beauty could hardly realize that true love exists for anyone over twenty years old!—The Ledg3r. SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL. To make ice by artiflcial means re quires one ton of coal to produce irom from five to ten tons of ice. A large sewing 'machine, weighing three and one-fourth tons, is in use in Leeds, England. It sews cotton belt irg. The average weight of the Chinese brain is said to be heavier than the average weight of the brain in any other race. Hard coal loses eight per cent, in bulk per annum when exposed to the weather. Soft coal lows twelve per cent. Experiments have shown that a pump kin will lift two and one-half tons, pro vided the weight is placed so as to interfere with the growth and develop ment of the vegetable. The temperature of the Mediterra nean at 200 fathoms is about flftv-six de grees, and no change is found ingoing to the bottom, which in places reaches a depth of 1500 lathoms. M. Chappuis's proposed electric rail way through the Simpion Pass is esti mated to cost $8,000,000, and it would greutly reduce the distance between Italy and Northern Europe. The cost of the observatory which is now being bdilt 'on thtf top of Mont Blanc, Switzerland, is estimated at $60,- 000. Part of the building is to be made available for guides and tourists. The central Sahara registers a mean of ninety-seven degrees in July. Australia boasts oftninety-four degrees in January, a mean which is attained in South Carolina an d< Inner Arabia in mid summer. A British scientist recently stated that if a man weighing 140 pounds were placed under a hydraulic press and squeezed flat, the result would be 105 pounds of water and thirty-five pounds of dry residue. A laboratory for ths . study, under strict scientific conditions,<of snake poi sons and cures for snakebites is to be established in Calcutta. It is to be founded by a native, and ' will be the only institution of its y kind in the world. An excellent method; for'waterproof ing the surface of a waUfis to cover it with a solution of soap. After twenty four hours a coat of lime is ap plied. This process n repeated several times, and is claimed to tfmike the wall perfectly water tight. The researches of many as reported upon by Dr. Buctan, show that the ocean currents cause theUemperature of the west side of the Atlantic, at depths from 100 to 500 fathoms to be nearly ten degrees wanner than at the same depths on the eastjside. M. Marcey, the well (Jknown investiga tor of animal inovementstby means of in stantaneous photography and the zoc trope, has now succeeded in rendering the beating of a living heart visible to the eye. All the phases of the move ment can be followed and properly ex amined by this new method. The heart employed in this experiment was that of a turtle. Official statistics of the colera epidem ic in Germany last year, and up to its practical disappearance, show that the number of deaths from cholera was 8510. Nine-tenths practically of this number were in the city and State of Hamburg, where the total number of was 7611—1.22 per cent, of the whole population. ( The statistics show that the cholera spread up the rivers from the center around Hamburg with diminish ing virulence. Pi.ch pine beams will shrink in thick ness from eighteen and three-quarter inches to eighteen and a quarter; spruce from eight and a half inches to eight and thiee-eights; white pine from twelve inches to eleven and seven eighths; yellow pine a trifle less. Cedar beams will shrink from a width of fourteen inches to thirteen and a quarter; elm from eloven to ten fund three-quarters, and oak from twelve to eleven and three-eights. Onyx Mines in Washington. A vein of onyx was discovered in Gar field County, Washington, recently which the report of an expert miner alogist who visited and examined the find a week or so since shows to be of considerable extent and probable value. The possible extent of the mines it 1000 acres, and openings for a mile show a ten-foot vein. The people of the vicinity claim that their county is possessed of the only onyx mines in the United States. —Chicago Times. Terms—ll.oo in Advance; 51.25 after Three Month*. THE FIGHTING DERVISHES. SONS OF THE DESERT WHO ABB UTTERLY FEARLESS. Charging Upon Ftre-Wailed Squares ot English Soldiery With Reck less Bravery. IT is easier to turn a hungry tiger aside from his prey than a thor oughly excited Dervish from his swoop on an enemy, writes a cor respondent on the London Telegraph. His half brother in fanaticism and creed, the Indian or Afghan Ghazi, is terrible, but the African and Arab Dervish is superlatively awful, with an incurable delirium for his opponent's gore. Howling and whirling Dervishes, such as travelers are "specially conducted to see when visiting the East," are a com paratively harmless sort of lunatics com paied with those types of the African bigots who, "converted" to Mahdism, burn to run amuck with the rest of the unbelieving humanity. Once fairly bit ten with the tarantula of Moslem sectar ian zeal, the proselyte is consumed with the belief that the delights of the seventh or any number of heavens await him if be can only engage in sturdy, steady butchery with "infidels," of his own or any race. It is a matter of indif ference to him if, in the operation, while he sheathes bis sword in his and his Prophet's enemy, the latter is doing the same to him. Quick and happy transla tion he holds as his cure reward. The stiff fight the other day bstween the Egyptian troops south of Wady Haifa and the Mahdists recalls to me many a bygone incident and fierce strug gle between British and Egyptian tioops and forces largely composed of Der vishes. Ambigol Cataract, where the skirmish took place, is about sixty miles south of Wady Haifa. There is an Egyp tian outpost at Qemai, where the great Second Cataract proper begins, and an other at Sarrass. The one station is fif teen miles and the other thirty-three miles further up stream, and the railroad line and ironclad train still run through to both posts. No doubt when the Der vish raiders, numbering 400 strong, were repulsed from the forts they fell back from the river towards the easier-going tracks inland, along which they must have sped on their camels. The Egyp tian cavalry—which, under careful Eng lish training, have learned to trust their weapons and their own physical strength in a contest with the Bedouinese—prob ably not numbering more than two squad rons, overtook the raiders at the pleas ant aforetime camps of Ambigol. There, no doubt, under the palm-trees' grateful shade, hard by the rush and roar of the mighty river, the Egyptian troops at once opened fire upciii.i>em. Although the whole of the enemy were unlikely to have been Dervishes—for these gentry never run away, but, when necessary, walk sedately out of a fight, merely to assume a fresh coign of vantage—a sharp engagement seems to have ensued. The Mahdists, nothing loath, swarmed, mounted and foot, up the rocky hills, which their pursuers had, with sound, tactical judgment, crowned, and whence they had opened fire. 1 think it was at the battle of El Teb I first made the acquaintance of the Mahdist Dervishes. The Fuzzy-Wuzzy Hadendowah tribesman is tho bravest of the brave, but the Dervish is heroism run crazy. These so-called "holy beg gars," self-sworn to devote themselves to the Prophet's cause, came at General Graham's tquare of marines, Highland men, and stout linesmen as if we had been children to be frightened by a cry. Clad in their patchwork rags, with shaved bared heads, many armed with no better weapons than sticks, they charged full in front of the fire-walled square. Down they went by scores and hundreds, but others quickly took up the running toward us. I saw them that day—more than one of them—pierced through and through with Martini-Henry bullet wounds, come fiercely on, reeling like drunken men, their teeth gleaming and eyes aflame with hatred. Happy were they if they could but cross weapons with our bayonets. When ex hausted nature failed them, their last act was generally to hurl the weapon they carried, stick, lance, or sword, toward our ranks, and shout an impreca tion against us, "Nosrani 1' (Nazarunol) An old gray-haired sheik actually charged tbe square reading the Koran aloud, which he held in his hands. Later on, when Sir Herbert (then Colonel) Stewart charged the worsted Arab footmen with his two regi ments of cavalry, their mounted Dervishes faced bis whole force and boldly charged them in return. Again, at Tamai, when the Arabs broke into General Davis's square, where I was, and having temporarily captured our six machine guns, on which they danced in fiendish glee, the D3rvishes were in the forefront of the attack. A big marine, who had bayoneted one of them, found his rifle caught and clutched by the fa natic savage, who strove to wrench his foeman with his sword. It was at the moment we were being driven back, and while the marine tugged and swore to get his weapon free, the reeling Dervish essayed with his parting strength to slay or wound our Tommy Atkins. In the desperate battle at Abu-Klea, similar scenes occurred. I state it as a fact, of which I took personal note at the time, that during the melee in which Colonel Burnaby fell, a Dervish, who had struck that officer, and was promptly bayoneted through the back, twisted about while the steel was protruding, and tried to thrust his lance into the soldier. Even the crippled and wounded Dervishes on the field of battle lay in wait to stab the chance passing enemy. Asked to "sur render," and put down their swords and speats, the invariable answer of the sorely stricken Dervish was, "Christian (or infidel) dogs, never 1" When I saw tbem last in the Soudan, a few years ago, there was no abatement in their blood thirsty ferocity, nor show of hesitation, whether they numbered few or many, of a longing to get to close quarters with their enemy. NO. 24. THE TWO VISIT*. The Kaiser goes to see tbe Casr, Tbe worl' turns out to see; His retfnue toilers from afar. An' then the Kaiser and the Csar Embrace in solemn glee, An* then saloot an' bug an' kiss. An' both are filled and soaked in bill Wen Igo down to Hiram's plaoe The worl' don't seen to care, I neither kisß his hands or faoa, 'Twould make 'em laff at Hiram's ptM% 'Twould make 'em 'ar an' tear. But Hiram says, ez roun' he pokes, "I'm glad to see ye; how's yer folksP* I take a look at Hiram's hogs An" hear how much they grow. This somehow Hiram's mem'ry jogs," An' he lets out on tbem ar* bogs— You oughter hear him blow; If you oould only hear him onoe You'd hear some ginooine elerkunos. Ol' Hiram he is slow enough But none too slow for me. For I'm a purty tame ol' duff, An' fairly moderit enough. An' jest as slow ez he. So we stub roun' the wh9le day long Until we hear the Bupper gong. Tbe Kaiser goes to see the Csar, And maybe stops to tea. But men like Czars an' Kaisers are, Cooped in the palace of the Czar, Hain't no sich times ez we. The Czar an' Kaiser know no charm Like loafln' roun' ol' Hiram's farm. —Sam Walter Foss, in Yankee Blade. HUMOR OF THE DAT. It is not man's sins that find him eut; it's his neighbor.—Atchison Globe. The great part of a self-willed man's estate usually goes to the lawyers.—Troy Press. Every day a man hears a dozen things ae ought to do that he can't do.—Atcbi ion Globe. "Do you believe in fate, Pat?" "Sure and phwat would we stand on widout 'em?"— Sittings. Whatever may be said of a sweetheart she can't be too good to be true.—Phil adelphia Times. There is no help for the case of the woman who can't get ai servant.—Phil adelphia Record. Teacher—"What is a hero?" Tommy —"The man who marries a heroine."— Indianapolis Journal. The cynic is the man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.—The Fun. Women arc not cruel to dumb animals. No woman will wilfully step on a mouse. —Richmond Recorder. It appears to be the .business of the needy tramp togo 'around looking for succors.—Binghainton Leader. "Do you think this tooth will stand filling?" Patient—"Well, I'm sure it has plenty of nerve."—lnter Ocean. The man who thaws , out dynamite is being heard from. There is generally but one report. —Baltimore American. The Keg—"Your headpiece is posi tively uj;ly." The Barrel (proudly)— "Maybe, but I wear hoops."—Chicago News. Time is generally represented as carry ing a scythe. This will probably be kept up till it is no mower.—Philadelphia Times. "There's auuther unconscious humor ist !" gleefully remarket! the footpad as he sandbagged the punster.—Washing ton Star. "There's a time to work and a time to play," but to the hand-organ grinder both times come at once.—Rochester Democrat. "Say, Chimmie," said the boy who had a white pink, "do blokie dat named dis flower must ov bin cplor blind."— Washington Star. That the cynic is an extreme type of humanity is indicated by the fact that he is always very old or very young.— Washington Star. "I feel better about lickin,' this postage stamp," said the boy who had been sent to mail a letter. "It's nearer my size." —Washington Star. "Yes," said tbe roan who had jusl fallen down three flights of stairs, "I've keen on quite an extended trip."—Kate Field's Washington. Dullpate—"l find it vorv 1 hard work to collect my thoughts." Maud—"Paps says it's always difficult to recover small amounts."—lnter Ocean. Mudge—"Thompson cabled me an idiot." Yabsley—"You neiedn't mind that. Thompson always does exaggerate more or less."—Tit-Bits. What maks the bicycle popular with many, rich or poor, is that, after trying to ride one, they feel that they are better off.—Philadelphia Times. Artist—"How do you like the por trait I made of you?" ( Cranky Subject —"Well, the coat is too tight under tbe arms."—New York Journal. The words of a man's mouth tell no more of the meditations of his heart than the voice of a dinner bell tells of the quality of the dinner.—Puck. "When it comes to revenue cutters," said old Bullion, snipping off another coupon, "there's nothing like a good pair of shears."—Chicago Tribune. A difference between a knife blade losing its temper and a woman is that tbe former becomes duller and the latter more cutting.—Philadelphia Times., When smiles the glad millennium Upon this mighty nation An offlo will be found for each . In the whole population. —Washington Star. At a Party: Suitor—"Mein Fraulein, I love you." Rich Young Lady (point ing with her fan to her father) — "Ex cuse me, yonder is my business manager. n —Wiener Luft. Mr. Horton—"What on earth did you want of this expensive fire screen?" Mrs. Horton—"To keep callers from dis covering that we hadn't any fire."—Chi cago Inter-Ocean. ,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers