SULLIVAN JSBm REPUBLICAN;
W. M. CHENEY, Publisher.
VOL. XI.
I eading German generals predict a
big war in Europe at an early day.
' Professor Huxley knows of no a priori
reason "why snake-bodied reptiles fifty
feet long and upward should not disport
themselves in our seal as they did in
thos^of- the cretaceous epoch."
i A National literature on roads is grad
ually jgrowing up in this country, and
the Pifaburg Dispatch thinks the sub
ject should be given a prominent place
in public school education in consonance
with importance.
' It is probable, predicts the San Fran
cisco Chronicle, that the device for dis
pensing with the services of telegraph
operators will fcc like the machine for
sotting type. Human ingenuity can go
a long way, but it cannot furnish brains,
and brains are very essential in telegra
ph -
According to the Courier-Journal the
great scramble for gold is now regarded
in Europe as a sign that European peace
is soon to be broken. Gold is not only
being locked up in the Imperial Treasury
of Russia, but in storehouses of other
continental Governments, and the feel
ing of anxiety on this account is wide
spread.
A Presidential inauguration costs less
than an ordinary Congressional funeral.
The total cost of President Harrison's
inauguration was $2520.50. The «ost
of a funeral varies from SSOOO to any
thing you please, according to the dis
tance over which the Congressional
mourners meander and the greed of
local undertakers and livery stable keep
ers.
This country is now building first
class war ships at lower prices than the
war ships of England are now costing.
The Boston Cultivator boasts that we
"make ships, too, equal to any that
English navy yards turn out. Perhaps
our methods of shipbuilding have less
red tape and corruption about them.
Our Government is in most points run
ifar less expensively than any monarchy
in Europe, and iu the lighter taxation
which the people of this country pay is
one of the causes of our greater pros
perity. "
Charles Mohr, of the United States
Forestry Bureau, has an article in the
Engineering Magazine, which demands
the attention of Southern legislators. He
says stupendous as the timber resources
of the South appear, it can but be evi
dent to anyone conversant with the facts
that we have entered already upon an era
involving their complete extinction, and
he vividly points out the threatening cal
amities that will follow the disappearance
of jur forests, not only in the extinction
of one of the South's important indus
tries, but in the climatic changes that are
already, perhaps, beginning to make
themselves felt.
Persons who are inciiDed to take a
gloomy view of pauperism and crime in
New York, would do well, suggests the
News, of that city, to glance at the of
ficial reports of the municipality of Lon
don. The two years ending January 1,
1891, the date of the last biennial re
port, the cost of maintaing the paupers
of London was £2,340,000, the equiva
lent of about $11,700*,000. During the
two years there were 109,748 criminal
convictions. Wuilo these figures show
that the percentage of crime and pauper
ism in London greatly exceeds that of
New York, the same report indicates a
much lower percentage of attendance in
the public schools.
A story from the Pall Mall Gazette was
recently printed in the New York Tri
bune, to the effect that the great com
parative anatomist, Sir Richard Owen,
identified as a pig's thigh-bone an osse
ous specimen sent him for that purpose
by Lord John Russoll, who afterward—
so it was stated—declared that it came
from what purported to be a bear's ham
presented by President Buchanan of the
United States. The Minneapolis Tri
bund, ignoring the possibility of a sub
stitution iu transit, ask: "Did our ante
bellum President willfully deceive Lord
John, was the eminent comparative an
atomist at fault for once, or has the Pall
Mall Gazette a talented liar on its staff?"
Within the past two years a number of
reefs and islands in the Pacific Ocean,
long known to mariners, have disap
peared from view, leaving no evidence
that they ever existed. No one under
stands the phenomenon, unless it be that
here and there the floor of the ocean has
subsided with unusual rapidity, though
uot with such violence as to be betrayed
by the agitation of the sea. The fact is
simply known that these stretches of reef
or bits of land, soine of them rising from
the depths, and all marked on the charts,
can no longer bo fouud. Oneortwo war
ships, with orders to visit some of these
places, have cruisel around in great be
wilderment, unable to rind the objects of
their q.iest.
The Sunday-School Magazine, of
Philadelphia, says that while San Fran
cisco has a population of 300,000, its
churches will seat only 55,000 people.
Oklahoma has just adopted a code of
maritime laws. The Atlanta Constitu
tion avers that there is not a body of
water in the Territory over a foot deep.
With a population of 215,000, Mon
treal has a debt of $19,000,000, or SBB
per head. Little wonder, comments the
San Francisco Examiner, that Cana
dians should be crossing the border. It
must be cheaper to move than pay taxes.
The St. Louis Republic takes no stock
in the theory of the overproduction of
cotton. It says that when the Southern
farmers raise all their foodstuff they can
not produce too much cotton. But
the trouble is that they will not raise
all their foodstuff for a long time to
come.
A Denver boarder made disparaging
remarks about the cooking set before
him, and much to his amusement the
landlady sued him for (20,000. His
merriment died away when the jury
brought in a verdict for $750, and he
has putin his time since in wondering
what there ever was in the episode to
strike him as humorous.
Pork is dearer now .than it has been in
ten years, or since Bismarck began to
make war on the American bog. This is
doubtless in part due to the opening of
European markets to our pork. With
better prices for pork beans have also
advanced, and the traditional New Eng
land dish of pork and beans has now to
be paid for by those who would enjoy it.
The London Graphic haP a portrait
and sketch of Potara, a Maori cannibal,
who is eighty-five years old and still has
a good set of natural teeth. He has not
eaten a white man since 1816. He
speaks well of white folks, but for a
steady diet prefers a Maori, as the
whites, or "Pakehas," have "a salty and
bitter flavor." Potara must have a re
tentive memory of his tastes.
The statement published by the New
York Sun of Consul Roosevelt at Brussels
that it has been found profitable to ship
cargoes of horse meat from this city to
Belgium to supply the tables of the poorer
classes may be news to most New York
ers. A good horsesteak is not unpalat
able, and though its edibility was dis
covered rather late in the day, thousands
of working people in Europe are now
glad to pay a little over six cants a pound
for it. Beef is entirely beyond their
means, and so is the varied bill of fare
that most working people in this favored
land enjoy every day.
In the opinion of the Chicago Herald
"the criminal art gallery is the worst
fruit that has been produced by grafting
civilization en barbarism. It is bad
enough to have the portrait of a convict
ed felon placed on exhibition for all the
world to see, even after he shall have
expiated his crime by serving his term
of imprisonment. If he should desire to
return to honest life the ineffaceable
lines of his countenance in the pictures
of the rogues' gallery are a standing and
damning imputation against him.
Either there should be no rogues' gal
lery, or every rogue, whether under po
lice protection or not, should have a
piace in the spectacular display of por
traits."
Italy expends every year $96,000,000
for her soldiers, and less than $4,000,000
for schools. In Spain it costs $100,000,-
000 to main the army, and only $1,500,-
000 to educate the children; but then, it
is the exception to find a Spanish farmer
who is able to read or write. Germany
boasts of being in the foremost rank
among the Nations in the Kulturkampf
of the world; yet she expends $185,-
000,000 on her army, while $10,000,000
is deemed sufficient for the education of
her children. France maintains an army
at an expense of $151,000,000 and sup
poi ts her schools with $21,000,000.
The United States expend $115,000,000
for public schools, while the army and
navy cost only $54,000,000.
Every one that has observed the treat
ment of private soldiers in European ar
mies knows how like cattle they are re
garded. Not long ago, relatea the Buf
lalo Courier, a saddle race was arranged
between officers of the Austrian and
Prussian armies, the course lying from
Vienna to Berlin. ▲ number of horses
were killed in this trial of endurance.
Recently the Austrian Government has
been drilling soldiers in the field, with
the thermometer at eighteen below sero,
in order to test the relative endurance of
the Austrians, Hungarians, and Poles in
tue service. In determining this point
to the satisfaction of the Government,
1144 soldiers had their hands or feet
badly frozen. These things are not likely
to lessen the stream of emigration to
America.
LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, MARCH 24,1893.
MORNING OP THE DISCOVERY.
Immortal Morn, all hail,
That saw Columbus sail
By faith alone.
The skies before him bowed,
Back rolled the ocean proud.
And every lifting cloud
I With glory shone!
Fair Science then was born
On that celestial morn,
Faith dared the sea.
Triumphant o'er her foes,
Then Truth immortal rose
New Heavens to disclose
And Earth to freel
Strong Freedom then came forth
To liberate the earth
And crown the right.
So walked the pilot bold
Upon the sea of gold,
And darkness backward rolled,
And there was light!
Sweep, sweep across the seas,
Ye rolling jubilees,
Grand chorals raise;
The world adoring stands,
And with uplifted hands
Offers from all the lands
To God its praise!
Ye hosts of Faith, sing on;
The victories ye have won
Shall time increase,
And like t e choral strain
That fell on Bethlehem's plain,
Inspire the perfect reign
Of Love and Peace!
—H. Butter worth, in Home and Country.
"Cousin" FREU"
BY AMY RANDOLPH.
T was a stormy twi
*v iS> V light in February,
the air full of the
dreary atmosphere of
BUMv/I newly fallen snow,
jmtWy.Ki Je huge pine trees
of the northern
SSy*|'2Ld wood? writhing them-
Ju.^7 selves about like
giants In extremis,
Maryville
/TOWi'' stage had just come
£ in with two passen
gers.
Ladies, both of them; ODe, apparently
thirty years old, the other, scarcely sev
enteen; and as they sat there warming
themselves by the hotel fire, the landlord
touched his wife's shoulder, and whis
pered to her: "Furriners!"
For there was something in the cut of
their curious fur lined draperies, the
shape of their neat crape hats, the very
way in which they unconsciously carried
themselves, which was as foreign as the
Marseillaise itself, although there was
no accent in their voices as they ques
tioned whether any conveyance from
Barnet Hill had been sent to meet them.
And the landlord was right; for Gene
vieve and Genevra Ballace wore the
daughters of American parentage, born
in sunny France. Orphaned and alone,
they were coming to America to claim
the protjetion of a relative of their
mothers, "Cousin Fred," as they had
been taught to call him.
"Do you suppose he will be good to
us?" Genevra, the dimpled seventeen
year-older, asked, as she sat with her
cheek against Genevieve's shoulder.
"I hope so, darling," said the elder
sister. "No one but a brute could be
unkind to you."
For little golden haired, rose lipped
Genevra was one of those human sun
beams who take every heart by storm,
and in her deep mourning, she looked
even sweeter and more attractive than
her ordinary wont. And dark eyed
Genevieve, thirteen years- older than her
sister, bad long ago unselfishly put aside
her own personality and identified her
self entirely with the household pet and
beauty.
"I wonder if he is a cross old crab,"
pondered Genevra, as she drank the tea
brought to her by the landlady, and
basked in the welcome warmth of the
blazing logs, "or a whimsical old bachel
or, full of caprices. Oh, Genevieve!
Don't you dread to meet him!"
Genevieve smiled.
"Little one," said she, "don't fret.
Whatever happens, we shall be together,
and—"
But just then, the landlord came bust
ling in.
"The double sleigh from Barnet Hill,
ladies," he said, rubbing his hauds.
"And Mr. Barnet himself has come."
Close on the landlord's words came
Mr. Barnet, of Barnet Hill, a tall, hand
some man of about thirty, with bright
brown hair clustering over a noble fore
head, keen black eyes and features clear
and perfect as those of the Apollo Belvi
dere.
"Are these my cousins?" he said,
pleasantly. "You are welcome to Bar
net, Genevieve and Genevra."
Instinctively, little Genevra put her
hand to her disheveled curls. Had she
expected to see any one but a wrinkled
old sexagenarian, she would have taken
more pains with her toilet. But Gene
vieve rose and smilingly put her hand
into the extended palm of her cousin.
It was a long, snowy drive to Barnet
Hill, but Genevra declared, joyously,
that it was worth it all, when they were
ushered into the great, old fashioned
drawing room with its blazing cannel
coal fires, its yellow satin curtains and
the moss-soft carpet on which the foot
fall made no sound.
"Do you know," said Cousin Fred,
laughing, "that I was expecting to see
two little school girls in short frocks and
thick boots!"
"And do you know," retorted Genev
ra, "that our minds were fully prepared
to behold a rheumatic old gentleman
with a crutch?"
And in fifteen minutes they were cn
the footing of old friends.
But they had scarcely lived six months
at Barnet Hill before the inevitable
"little cloud like a man's hand" arose
on their atmosphere.
"Genevieve," said Mr. Barnet, rather
gravely, one day."l wish you would
warn dear little Gypsy against that
Captain Allaire. He's a pleasant, amus
ing fellow, I know; but he's scarcely
the person I should select for any girl'*
husband."
"Yes, Cousin Fred, I will speak to
her," said Genevieve, sighing softly as
she wondered what spell Genevra pos
sessed to win all hearts to herself, from
stately Cousin Fred to the handsome
dashing young captain of artillery.
"But have you reasoned with her on the
subject?"
"Half a dozen times," said Barnet.
"But she only laughs at me."
Genevieve was silent. She wondered
if popular rumor was correct, and
Frederic Barnet really did love little
Genevra so hopelessly so dearly.
Genevrft came home late that eveuing
in the rosy sunset, with scarlet wild
flowers in her hair.
"I have been to the village," she said,
"with Captain Allaire."
"Oh, Genevra!" pleaded the elder sis
ter. "When Fied thinks—"
"I don't care what Fred thinks," in
terrupted the beauty, with a toss of her
head.
"Listen, Genevieve, I have a secret to
tell you; I was married to Captain Al
laire this afternoon!
"'Married!'" echoed Genevieve.
"Oh, Genevra!"
"Look at my wedding ring," said the
wild little gypsy, holding up her pretty,
taper finger. "Yes, married—really and
actually married! I am Mrs. Allaire
now," with an amusing assumption of
matronly dignity.
"But Cousin Fred—"
"Cousin Fred may help himself if be
can," said Genevra, audaciously. "Per
haps yon don't know, Jenny, that Cousin
Fred himself means to be married very
soon.
Genevieve turned pale.
"Genevra!" cried she. "You can't
mean that?"
"Poor little Genevieve 1" consoled
Genevra. "But you will not lose your
home. You must come and live with me
and Charley."
"I could not do that," said Genevieve,
giddy and confused with the unexpected
succession of startling news, "I—l
must look out for a situation in some
school or as companion or nursery gov
erness! But oh, Genevra, are you quite
sure about Fred!"
"I heard the old housekeeper talking
to the coachman, when I was waiting,
down behind the shrubbery, for Captain
Allaire to come," said Genevra, with a
nod of her pretty head. "She said he
had told her himsell and had instructed
her what rooms to prepare and what al
terations to make in the household ar
rangements, for his coming marriage."
"I wonder who it can be," said Gene
vieve, sadly.
"Miss Hilyard, of toui-se," said Gea
evra, "or else that beautiful Mrs. St.
Dean. Bat the least thing he could
have done was to have confided in us, I
think, and that's one reason I decided
to elope. And Charley is coming up
this evening, and we are to take the train
to St. Vincent, and, oh, dear Jenny,"
with a burst of sparkling tears, "the
world is so full of happiness to rae I"
And Genevieve could but caress the
beautiful, willful young creature who
had tak&n life's helm so recklessly into
her bands, and hope, in a choking voice,
that she might be very, very happy.
Cousin Fred listened very philosophic
ally to Genevra's confession, half an hour
later.
"Married, are you!" said ho. "Well,
if you had asked my advice, I should
have given a cuntray verdict. But, as
you didn't consult me, why, I shall havo
to be like, the 'heavy fathers' on the
stage and give you my blessing. Allaire
is a clever fellow enough, although he
has been very gay, and I hope you will
steady him down, at last."
So, the newly married pair went away,
as thoughtlessly happy as two school
children out for a picnic, and Genevieve
was left alone with Fred, to wonder bow
she could best break to him the resolu
tion at which she had arrived. For she
knew thai she could never remain at the
Hill when beautiful Mrs. St. Dean or
Alicia Hilyard should either of them be
the mistress there.
"It would kill me," she thought,
clasping her hands. "Yes, it would kill
mel"
Mr. Barnet had turned kindly to her,
and led her to a seat beside the win
dow.
"You are pale, Genevieve," be said.
"Your hands are as cold as ice. Surely,
you do not take this mad freak ol little
Gypsy's so bitterly to heart! Never
fear for her; she's a butterfly who will sip
honey from all life's garden ground.
Her nature is light and Jrothy; far dif
ferent, Genevieve, from yours. Sit
down, little cousin; I have much to say
to you."
"Now," thought poor Genevieve,
with her color changing from scarlet to
white—"now it is coming! I shall be
politely dismissed from the only home I
have!"
And a sensation of indescribable lone
liness passed through her heart as she
pictured Genevra radiantly happy with
her captain of artillery, Cousin Fred
secure in the love of some stately and
beautiful woman, herself only left out in
the cold of life's dreariest vale, an un
loved and solitary old maid. But she
spoke nothing of all these sickening
fears; only looked at him, with wistful
dark eyes, in silence.
"Genevieve," said he, "do you think
it would be a wild and foolish dream for
me to think of marriage?"
"You? Oh, no," she answered, try
ing to smile.
"But I am three and thirty."
"You are only in the prime and full
ness of life," she responded—"for a
man. With women," sighing softly,
"everything is so different. But,
Cousin Fred, if you really intend marry
ing—"
"I really do," he said, smiling gravely.
"Then I shall not bo longer in your
way," she said valiantly. "I will leave
Barnet Hill at once."
"But thit's just what I don't want
you to do, Genevieve," he said, with her
hand still closely held in his. "Dear,
solemn little woman, is it possible that
you don't comprehend what I mean?"
"You think," with a startled look,
"that I can be useful about the house?"
"Must I say it in go many words,
Genevieve," be asked) "Shall I go
lown on my knees, like' the heroes of
romance, and say: 'Sweetheart, will you
be my wife?'"
Genevieve started to her feet in a
panic.
"Do you really mean me!" cried Gen
evieve.
"I really mean—you," he said, reso
lutely, holding her fast, when she would
have flown from him. "Little girl, then
you never have suspected how dearly I
love you I"
And Genevieve, clasping both bands
over her eyes, could scarcely persuade
herself that all this was not a dream, a
beautiful, blissful yet baseless dream.
Mrs. St. Dean was no longer a rival! She
had nothing to fear from Alicia Hilyard I
Cousin Fred loved her, and her alone I
Cousin Fred had always loved her!
So they were married; and whe#Gen
evra knew it she cried out, laughing:
"Well, there is hope for the oldest of
old maids, now that our Jenny is mar
ried !"
For this seventeen-year-old beauty
could hardly realize that true love exists
for anyone over twenty years old!—The
Ledg3r.
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
To make ice by artiflcial means re
quires one ton of coal to produce irom
from five to ten tons of ice.
A large sewing 'machine, weighing
three and one-fourth tons, is in use in
Leeds, England. It sews cotton belt
irg.
The average weight of the Chinese
brain is said to be heavier than the
average weight of the brain in any other
race.
Hard coal loses eight per cent, in
bulk per annum when exposed to the
weather. Soft coal lows twelve per
cent.
Experiments have shown that a pump
kin will lift two and one-half tons, pro
vided the weight is placed so as to
interfere with the growth and develop
ment of the vegetable.
The temperature of the Mediterra
nean at 200 fathoms is about flftv-six de
grees, and no change is found ingoing
to the bottom, which in places reaches a
depth of 1500 lathoms.
M. Chappuis's proposed electric rail
way through the Simpion Pass is esti
mated to cost $8,000,000, and it would
greutly reduce the distance between
Italy and Northern Europe.
The cost of the observatory which is
now being bdilt 'on thtf top of Mont
Blanc, Switzerland, is estimated at $60,-
000. Part of the building is to be made
available for guides and tourists.
The central Sahara registers a mean of
ninety-seven degrees in July.
Australia boasts oftninety-four degrees in
January, a mean which is attained in
South Carolina an d< Inner Arabia in mid
summer.
A British scientist recently stated that
if a man weighing 140 pounds were
placed under a hydraulic press and
squeezed flat, the result would be 105
pounds of water and thirty-five pounds
of dry residue.
A laboratory for ths . study, under
strict scientific conditions,<of snake poi
sons and cures for snakebites is to be
established in Calcutta. It is to be
founded by a native, and ' will be the
only institution of its y kind in the
world.
An excellent method; for'waterproof
ing the surface of a waUfis to cover it
with a solution of soap. After twenty
four hours a coat of lime is ap
plied. This process n repeated several
times, and is claimed to tfmike the wall
perfectly water tight.
The researches of many as
reported upon by Dr. Buctan, show that
the ocean currents cause theUemperature
of the west side of the Atlantic, at
depths from 100 to 500 fathoms to be
nearly ten degrees wanner than at the
same depths on the eastjside.
M. Marcey, the well (Jknown investiga
tor of animal inovementstby means of in
stantaneous photography and the zoc
trope, has now succeeded in rendering
the beating of a living heart visible to
the eye. All the phases of the move
ment can be followed and properly ex
amined by this new method. The heart
employed in this experiment was that of
a turtle.
Official statistics of the colera epidem
ic in Germany last year, and up to its
practical disappearance, show that the
number of deaths from cholera was
8510. Nine-tenths practically of this
number were in the city and State of
Hamburg, where the total number of
was 7611—1.22 per cent, of the whole
population. ( The statistics show that
the cholera spread up the rivers from the
center around Hamburg with diminish
ing virulence.
Pi.ch pine beams will shrink in thick
ness from eighteen and three-quarter
inches to eighteen and a quarter; spruce
from eight and a half inches to eight
and thiee-eights; white pine from
twelve inches to eleven and seven
eighths; yellow pine a trifle less.
Cedar beams will shrink from a width
of fourteen inches to thirteen and a
quarter; elm from eloven to ten fund
three-quarters, and oak from twelve to
eleven and three-eights.
Onyx Mines in Washington.
A vein of onyx was discovered in Gar
field County, Washington, recently
which the report of an expert miner
alogist who visited and examined the
find a week or so since shows to be of
considerable extent and probable value.
The possible extent of the mines it 1000
acres, and openings for a mile show a
ten-foot vein. The people of the vicinity
claim that their county is possessed of
the only onyx mines in the United States.
—Chicago Times.
Terms—ll.oo in Advance; 51.25 after Three Month*.
THE FIGHTING DERVISHES.
SONS OF THE DESERT WHO ABB
UTTERLY FEARLESS.
Charging Upon Ftre-Wailed Squares
ot English Soldiery With Reck
less Bravery.
IT is easier to turn a hungry tiger
aside from his prey than a thor
oughly excited Dervish from his
swoop on an enemy, writes a cor
respondent on the London Telegraph.
His half brother in fanaticism and creed,
the Indian or Afghan Ghazi, is terrible,
but the African and Arab Dervish is
superlatively awful, with an incurable
delirium for his opponent's gore.
Howling and whirling Dervishes, such
as travelers are "specially conducted to
see when visiting the East," are a com
paratively harmless sort of lunatics com
paied with those types of the African
bigots who, "converted" to Mahdism,
burn to run amuck with the rest of the
unbelieving humanity. Once fairly bit
ten with the tarantula of Moslem sectar
ian zeal, the proselyte is consumed with
the belief that the delights of the
seventh or any number of heavens await
him if be can only engage in sturdy,
steady butchery with "infidels," of his
own or any race. It is a matter of indif
ference to him if, in the operation, while
he sheathes bis sword in his and his
Prophet's enemy, the latter is doing the
same to him. Quick and happy transla
tion he holds as his cure reward.
The stiff fight the other day bstween
the Egyptian troops south of Wady
Haifa and the Mahdists recalls to me
many a bygone incident and fierce strug
gle between British and Egyptian tioops
and forces largely composed of Der
vishes. Ambigol Cataract, where the
skirmish took place, is about sixty miles
south of Wady Haifa. There is an Egyp
tian outpost at Qemai, where the great
Second Cataract proper begins, and an
other at Sarrass. The one station is fif
teen miles and the other thirty-three
miles further up stream, and the railroad
line and ironclad train still run through
to both posts. No doubt when the Der
vish raiders, numbering 400 strong, were
repulsed from the forts they fell back
from the river towards the easier-going
tracks inland, along which they must
have sped on their camels. The Egyp
tian cavalry—which, under careful Eng
lish training, have learned to trust their
weapons and their own physical strength
in a contest with the Bedouinese—prob
ably not numbering more than two squad
rons, overtook the raiders at the pleas
ant aforetime camps of Ambigol. There,
no doubt, under the palm-trees' grateful
shade, hard by the rush and roar of the
mighty river, the Egyptian troops at
once opened fire upciii.i>em. Although
the whole of the enemy were unlikely to
have been Dervishes—for these gentry
never run away, but, when necessary,
walk sedately out of a fight, merely to
assume a fresh coign of vantage—a sharp
engagement seems to have ensued. The
Mahdists, nothing loath, swarmed,
mounted and foot, up the rocky hills,
which their pursuers had, with sound,
tactical judgment, crowned, and whence
they had opened fire.
1 think it was at the battle of El Teb
I first made the acquaintance of the
Mahdist Dervishes. The Fuzzy-Wuzzy
Hadendowah tribesman is tho bravest of
the brave, but the Dervish is heroism
run crazy. These so-called "holy beg
gars," self-sworn to devote themselves
to the Prophet's cause, came at General
Graham's tquare of marines, Highland
men, and stout linesmen as if we had
been children to be frightened by a cry.
Clad in their patchwork rags, with
shaved bared heads, many armed with
no better weapons than sticks, they
charged full in front of the fire-walled
square. Down they went by scores and
hundreds, but others quickly took up the
running toward us. I saw them that
day—more than one of them—pierced
through and through with Martini-Henry
bullet wounds, come fiercely on, reeling
like drunken men, their teeth gleaming
and eyes aflame with hatred. Happy
were they if they could but cross
weapons with our bayonets. When ex
hausted nature failed them, their last act
was generally to hurl the weapon they
carried, stick, lance, or sword, toward
our ranks, and shout an impreca
tion against us, "Nosrani 1' (Nazarunol)
An old gray-haired sheik actually
charged tbe square reading the Koran
aloud, which he held in his hands.
Later on, when Sir Herbert (then
Colonel) Stewart charged the worsted
Arab footmen with his two regi
ments of cavalry, their mounted
Dervishes faced bis whole force and
boldly charged them in return. Again,
at Tamai, when the Arabs broke into
General Davis's square, where I was,
and having temporarily captured our six
machine guns, on which they danced in
fiendish glee, the D3rvishes were in the
forefront of the attack. A big marine,
who had bayoneted one of them, found
his rifle caught and clutched by the fa
natic savage, who strove to wrench his
foeman with his sword. It was at the
moment we were being driven back, and
while the marine tugged and swore to
get his weapon free, the reeling Dervish
essayed with his parting strength to slay
or wound our Tommy Atkins. In the
desperate battle at Abu-Klea, similar
scenes occurred. I state it as a fact, of
which I took personal note at the time,
that during the melee in which Colonel
Burnaby fell, a Dervish, who had struck
that officer, and was promptly bayoneted
through the back, twisted about while
the steel was protruding, and tried to
thrust his lance into the soldier. Even
the crippled and wounded Dervishes on
the field of battle lay in wait to stab the
chance passing enemy. Asked to "sur
render," and put down their swords and
speats, the invariable answer of the
sorely stricken Dervish was, "Christian
(or infidel) dogs, never 1" When I saw
tbem last in the Soudan, a few years ago,
there was no abatement in their blood
thirsty ferocity, nor show of hesitation,
whether they numbered few or many, of
a longing to get to close quarters with
their enemy.
NO. 24.
THE TWO VISIT*.
The Kaiser goes to see tbe Casr,
Tbe worl' turns out to see;
His retfnue toilers from afar.
An' then the Kaiser and the Csar
Embrace in solemn glee,
An* then saloot an' bug an' kiss.
An' both are filled and soaked in bill
Wen Igo down to Hiram's plaoe
The worl' don't seen to care,
I neither kisß his hands or faoa,
'Twould make 'em laff at Hiram's ptM%
'Twould make 'em 'ar an' tear.
But Hiram says, ez roun' he pokes,
"I'm glad to see ye; how's yer folksP*
I take a look at Hiram's hogs
An" hear how much they grow.
This somehow Hiram's mem'ry jogs,"
An' he lets out on tbem ar* bogs—
You oughter hear him blow;
If you oould only hear him onoe
You'd hear some ginooine elerkunos.
Ol' Hiram he is slow enough
But none too slow for me.
For I'm a purty tame ol' duff,
An' fairly moderit enough.
An' jest as slow ez he.
So we stub roun' the wh9le day long
Until we hear the Bupper gong.
Tbe Kaiser goes to see the Csar,
And maybe stops to tea.
But men like Czars an' Kaisers are,
Cooped in the palace of the Czar,
Hain't no sich times ez we.
The Czar an' Kaiser know no charm
Like loafln' roun' ol' Hiram's farm.
—Sam Walter Foss, in Yankee Blade.
HUMOR OF THE DAT.
It is not man's sins that find him eut;
it's his neighbor.—Atchison Globe.
The great part of a self-willed man's
estate usually goes to the lawyers.—Troy
Press.
Every day a man hears a dozen things
ae ought to do that he can't do.—Atcbi
ion Globe.
"Do you believe in fate, Pat?" "Sure
and phwat would we stand on widout
'em?"— Sittings.
Whatever may be said of a sweetheart
she can't be too good to be true.—Phil
adelphia Times.
There is no help for the case of the
woman who can't get ai servant.—Phil
adelphia Record.
Teacher—"What is a hero?" Tommy
—"The man who marries a heroine."—
Indianapolis Journal.
The cynic is the man who knows the
price of everything and the value of
nothing.—The Fun.
Women arc not cruel to dumb animals.
No woman will wilfully step on a mouse.
—Richmond Recorder.
It appears to be the .business of the
needy tramp togo 'around looking for
succors.—Binghainton Leader.
"Do you think this tooth will stand
filling?" Patient—"Well, I'm sure it
has plenty of nerve."—lnter Ocean.
The man who thaws , out dynamite is
being heard from. There is generally
but one report. —Baltimore American.
The Keg—"Your headpiece is posi
tively uj;ly." The Barrel (proudly)—
"Maybe, but I wear hoops."—Chicago
News.
Time is generally represented as carry
ing a scythe. This will probably be kept
up till it is no mower.—Philadelphia
Times.
"There's auuther unconscious humor
ist !" gleefully remarket! the footpad as
he sandbagged the punster.—Washing
ton Star.
"There's a time to work and a time to
play," but to the hand-organ grinder
both times come at once.—Rochester
Democrat.
"Say, Chimmie," said the boy who
had a white pink, "do blokie dat named
dis flower must ov bin cplor blind."—
Washington Star.
That the cynic is an extreme type of
humanity is indicated by the fact that
he is always very old or very young.—
Washington Star.
"I feel better about lickin,' this postage
stamp," said the boy who had been sent
to mail a letter. "It's nearer my size."
—Washington Star.
"Yes," said tbe roan who had jusl
fallen down three flights of stairs, "I've
keen on quite an extended trip."—Kate
Field's Washington.
Dullpate—"l find it vorv 1 hard work
to collect my thoughts." Maud—"Paps
says it's always difficult to recover small
amounts."—lnter Ocean.
Mudge—"Thompson cabled me an
idiot." Yabsley—"You neiedn't mind
that. Thompson always does exaggerate
more or less."—Tit-Bits.
What maks the bicycle popular with
many, rich or poor, is that, after trying
to ride one, they feel that they are better
off.—Philadelphia Times.
Artist—"How do you like the por
trait I made of you?" ( Cranky Subject
—"Well, the coat is too tight under tbe
arms."—New York Journal.
The words of a man's mouth tell no
more of the meditations of his heart than
the voice of a dinner bell tells of the
quality of the dinner.—Puck.
"When it comes to revenue cutters,"
said old Bullion, snipping off another
coupon, "there's nothing like a good
pair of shears."—Chicago Tribune.
A difference between a knife blade
losing its temper and a woman is that
tbe former becomes duller and the latter
more cutting.—Philadelphia Times.,
When smiles the glad millennium
Upon this mighty nation
An offlo will be found for each .
In the whole population.
—Washington Star.
At a Party: Suitor—"Mein Fraulein,
I love you." Rich Young Lady (point
ing with her fan to her father) — "Ex
cuse me, yonder is my business manager. n
—Wiener Luft.
Mr. Horton—"What on earth did you
want of this expensive fire screen?"
Mrs. Horton—"To keep callers from dis
covering that we hadn't any fire."—Chi
cago Inter-Ocean. ,