*895-] knew nothing about stockings for street ■ wear, or toothpicks at breakfast. The dude of Athens never smoked cigarettes or wore creases in his trousers. He didn’t wear trousers. We have a few things in our days that plainly the wise ancients did not discover. It is not then the object of this little scene from Athenian daily life to claim that because the people of Athens played football they left the boys of State College nothing else to discover worth knowing. Well, here is the yarn as some of the Greeks gave it to us: ' 1 Good morning, Socrates, you appear to be out early this morn- “Good morning, Aristophanes. No, praise be to the gods ! I am not up earlier than usual. For what do you mean, Aristo phanes, by saying that the hour is early ? ’ ’ "Why, surely, that it is not late, Socrates,” wisely and aptly replied Aristophanes. ‘ ‘ The gods have clearly given thee great wisdom. But suppose it were nine o’clock at this moment, wouldst thou call that early ? ’ ’ " No, certainly not, Socrates, that would be late.” "But how is it, Aristophanes, suppose thou wert the Banker Callias instead of Aristophanes, the writer of comedies, then wouldst not thou call it early to be out at nine ? ’ ’ " Yes, of a surety, Socrates, it would be early for me if I were the wealthy Callias to be out at nine. Thou makest me almost believe that the hour of six may not be early to Socrates, though it may be so to Aristophanes. But now, Socrates, what seek you abroad?” "Why, surely, Aristophanes, I seek my friends.” " Right, Socrates, and well met. What means it that your foot is bandaged ? How didst thou injure that noble member? Hath some brawler of Athens set upon thee, and wast thou compelled to employ thy foot to teach him good behavior in the Agora ? ’ ’ " No. O, Aristophanes, nothing of this sort hath caused me to suffer. Thou knowest that because Igo barefooted at all seasons as both being cheaper and more healthy that I could even kick a rascal into the gutter without trouble. No, this is not the reason of the goodly cloth that thou seest wrapped about my foot. I must acquaint thee with the fact that yesterday I went to see the football game over beside the Ilissus. Hasn't thou heard of it, Aristophanes?” "No, of a surety, I have not, Socrates. Canst thou delay long enough thy noble efforts to reform Cleon and his Football at Athens.
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