Frorh the New York Minor. VlIE ClftliSE OF NEPTUNE. bi Tnibcbnr i, nr. " What, ho," cried Ncptuhc, one calm "flight, " Death and Fire! Pluto! Jupiter! Amphilrito ! what ho I" Never was monarch in such a rage ; nc Vcr'was rage sb powerful. The bluo sky liegan to bo blackened with heavy clouds. The winds rose; the waVes heaved 5 and distant thunder muttered along the horizon. The rivers and fountains poured their troub led waters 'rhorc filriously into the ocean ; the dolphins and sea-horses which drew Vis chariot-shell, snoVtcd and spiashcdaftd pricked up their ears , tho mountains and the forests trembled ; vhal03 and sea-serpents and other marine monsters tumbled up in haste and terror from their profound grottoes ; and all the tritons, nereides and sea divinities which inhabithis Watery king ddm, deflected abound the wrathful god 't& know what the ducc was the matter. Even the great deep itself gave forth a low tone of fear at the sudden fury of its king. "I have been robbed 1" cried tho mon arch, stamping his foot, whereat three or four islands were raised from the bottom to the surface of he agitated waves. "Some daring taiid-lubber has stolen my trident ; but, by the beard of my 'father Saturn, 'tin ehall feel what it is to trifle with old Nep tune ! What, ho ! Jupiter, awake, and bear 'a hand with your thunder." Even whilo he spoke, an earthquake shook three quarters of tho globe, arid dis turbed tho sleep of Jupiter himself, 'on tho summit of Olympus. There was throughout the whole universe the Very deuce to pay. Jupiter in rising yawned so 4oud,that several temples were shaken down, and Juno screamed "Whaton earth is the matter?" in such ah 'angry and shrill tdne, that the inferior gods and goddesses could 'not help covering their ears with their hands and making horrible faces at the discord. Those supernaturals are nome of them re maikablo for moderation )r sclf-contfoul, ut when Juno onco gets her temper, she is the very old 'Satan. "What's tho matter ?v' exclaimed All at 'once. After a moment's silence, a report was received that Neptune had raised all this "clamor because ho had lost his trident. " Confound the fellow ! He might at least have waited till morning," said Jupi ter, with another yawn. "He is an infernal old fool," said Juno. " I will break his head with a slcdge hammer," Said Vulcan. "By heaven ! he shall give mo the sauV faction of a gentleman," muttered Mars, in a Tury. "Cupid, my love,'' said Venus, re-tying her nightcap, "we'll pleague him well fdr Uiis to-morrow." "Where is my sceptre?" cried Jtipiter, "I'll call a council this instant. To disturb us in this style the whole assembly of the gods for a loss merely private ! Where he dueo is my sceptre ?" But the sceptre was gone. Jupiter turri td pale with rage. " Why, gods 1" cried he, "it is not possi ble '. Juno my dear, look about curse that eagle he's always in tho way when he's not wanted look behind the throne, tiy the Styx ! Who has dared ? All Tartary shall stir for this! Hand me those thunder bolts. What, ho ! my sceptre.' ' "Oh, ho!' said Venus, slyly smiling, "how much more severely do we feel our own los'Scs than those of others." "Mamma," said Cupid "shall I pldguo -Jupiter too ?" "Be quiet) my child," said Venus. "I really thought Jupiter had mord dig nity," said Marsf "he Is just as furious as 'old Neptune himself." " I wish he would be a little cardfilt how he handles thbsd thunderbolts, though," whispered Venus in some alarm. "Hang him!" said Mais, "he'll let tliem off at nit next. Oh I if battle's the word, I'll not be behindhand ; but, halloo what the deuce where's ttly sword ? halloo traitors thunder death famine and fire who has got my sword ? Vulcan, you black rascal!" "No jaw," said Vulcarij "I demand my sword," cried Marsi "Don't bully me," said Vulcan. "But heaven and earth!" and he turned white as a sheet through tne soot, which begrlmmed his face ; "some person has broken into my shop and mado off with rny best hammer, two anvil?, and a new pair of patent bclows.' Venus laughed till tho tears rollud down her checks. "Was ever such a sc6nu!" cried she 5 "all heaven turned upside down by tltc loss of a few paltry trifles which will be found again, doubtlS's, In the morning." " But, mamma, it's very curious who could Wo'tftdlbh them," cried Cupid. "Very, my dear; and, now I think of it, I am glad I did not tako off my girdle last night before I went to bed ; let ino see, it could scarcely bo abstracted, I think, whilo clasped round my waist ah I' She uttered a terrible scream. The gir dle was gone ! 'Well, said Minerva, with great dignity, 'hern's a pretty kettlo offish.' At tho same she quietly retired 1o a respectful "distance from Jupiter, his thunderbolts, and the rest of the highly excited assembly ; it's all ve ry fine,' continued the grave goddess, plac ing her fingers on hcr,nose, D. I. 0.' It is not easy to sdy, exactly how this would have turned out, for Mats was stamp ing about like a raving madman ; Venus had gone into violent hyslericks ; Vulcan, 'armed with a huge iron bar, was rushing to and fro in desperate wrath; and Jupiter had raised his thunderbolts high in the air, and was just going to let fly among the crowd promiscously, when the cry aroso that 'the thief was taken. A fierce-lookina under diety, the Jacob Hays 6f Olympus, walked into the assembly, having one hand on the thVoa't of a young man, and on the other arm a parcel of things, which, upon being thrown down at the foot of Jupiter's ivory thrdttc, proving to bo tho missing articles Juno handed up the sceptre, which her roy al consort received with a smile; Venus fastened on hcr'girdlc, sobbing all the while, Vulcan received his welcome property, and struck a tremendous blow on tho ground, with his hammer, Which came near mashing Juno's toes ; and Mars unsheathed his blade with a savage grin, gave three or four ilor ishes in the air, and returned it to the scab bard with a violence which' made the whole heavens ring again, Neptune's trident a- lonc remained on the floor. 'Now, ladies and gentlemen,' said Jupl ...:.u '.u.. ji i;t.. ....! it;i, Willi uiuiu uiuu ins uauui i;uuuiuauiu, 'you see tho folly of getting into a passion Take example by me, and' bo always calm and philosophical under every vicisitude.' The gods looked at each other in silence, and Cupid winked to his mother, and cough ed slightly. 'lie silent, you impudent younjr scoun drel;' said Jupiter; 'and now let us sec who is that audacious Valet of a theif. Come here, sir, step up, who the deuce are you?' 4 My name is Mercury,' said thd hand some youth And pray, Mr. Mercury, how dared ybuJ steal my sceptre ?' And my girdle, monster,' said Venus. 'And my sword, Wretch,' thundered Mars. 'And my new patent bellows, you rascal.' added Vulcan. 'Ladies and gentlemen,' said the prison er with a sweet smile, 'keep cool ; iilid you father of men and gods, hear my story. I was born of a very genteel family; my grandfather was Atlas, a great landholder ; my mother was the beautiful Main ' And who was your father ?' demanded Juno somewhat briskly. 'Shut your fly-trap,' said Jupiter. 'My fattier is the honorable monarch of men and gods, beform whom I have now the mortification to stand a captive.' 'So, ho !' said Juno, I p'dsscsscd myself of these articles,' continued the prisoner, 'not for any desire to retain them, but in order to recommend myself to your notice, oh fcods J whohi I had aii ambition to serve,' 'Yt)u are a charming fellow,' slid Jupi ter; Juno, bo quiet; I like you, and will employ you. You shall be my messenger, interpreter, and cup-bearer. I present you this winged ,,cap and these wings for your feet. With them you may go wherever ydu please with tho greatest celerity, aitd be Invisiblo when you desire. You shall be embassador and plenipotentiary, and your first duly shall be to seek Neptune, and return to him the trident with my com pliments,' But, sire, perhaps t!(o Old fellow will be nd more indulgent than you for my jest.' 'Fear not, he shall not harm you ; make yourself scarcb tramp, begotle !' And Mercury, with a bound, disappeared Old Ncplunij was in a snorting rage. Ho had turned the ocean upside down ; he had swopt off villages and towns, and shattered a score cf rocky coast mountain In pieces. The sea-gods entreated his majesty . to be calm, and intimated that ho was only itijuf iag his own subjects. Ho replied Varlets and vagabonds, miitg tne my trident l" At length Mercury appeared, and with thrco bows, (for Mercury had travelled and was wonderfully polite,) returned the tri dent, "ari'd related tho story. Why, you desperate thief;' cried the watery god, the brine drippling fr6m his hoary bcatd, 'you impudent valet, Jupiter's compliments ? that for Jupiter, you his ambassador ? you his confidant ? you bo hanged ! by Olympus ! you are a plebcin.' 1 tell .you vhat, old chap, said the am bassador, 'you might 'tis well keep a 'civil tongue in your head.' Earthquakes and thunder ! you rascal 1' rejoined the enraged king, if ever I catch you "upon "my realms again, I'll give you to shall make a bonne bouche. for ono of my whales ; avau'nt you ragamuffin.' That for you !' said Mercury, snap ping his thumb and finger under the very h'6sc of the god, "that that that for youl' your monsters and you may go to Pluto. Oh, old chap, no bragging, no bullying with mc, I'm none of your dolphins.' Why, you unutterable son of a gun,' cried Neptune, bursting with wrath, so help mc Saturn, my father, if cv'er I catch you an inch on our domain again, I'll drown you like a blind kitten you're a Scaramouch. Curse mo if ever I saw such a harlequin." Oh, y'ou Vulgar 'Old fool,' said Mercury, in the most tantalizing manner, lighting on the edge of tho chariot, and sticking his chin defyingly "in the faco of his enemy, 'Vou're a regular loafer, and so far from re fraining to como myself upon your kingdom, Fll teach mail to trdverse it as a high-road ; I'll have it overrun with boats, ships whole fleets. By the Styx ! I'll people it with steamboats.' So saying, and snapping his fingers pgain at his foe, now altogether speechless with rage, he leaped off into the air, and was off in tho twinkling of an eye. Neptune duck' cd beneath the flodd. My rich is mortal it cannot paint his feelings In about three minutes Mercury alighted Phoenicia on the banks of the river Eleutlierus, which falls into the Meditcra- nean below the island Aradus. He there saw a shepherd standing on the shoro con- templaiinir some trees on tho other side of the stream. "What arc you looking at?" cridd Mer cury. "That fine fruif," answered the Shop- herd. "I have bfeen here all my life ten ding flocks. Everv autumn that fruit ri pens and falls and is eaten by tho birds; and though I behold it for ever, I can never reach it. 'Can't yu swim?" asked the god. 'No," said tho shepherd; and if I coiild it is too for a swimmer." "Look lierc!" said Mercury; "just lend me your axe Straightway he went and cut down a tree, chopped off the branches; hewed but tho. trunk; constructed a pair of oars and, be hold, a boat! Jump in, said mercury, "don t be a- 1 ... .... : j fraid." . . In five minutes the shephered reached the long-desired spot, and had soon eaten as much as ho wished, , "Now," said Mbroury, "where are yod going? Back again to my sheep, to be s'ure," replied the shepherd. "What! won t you take some fruit Iq your wife and children? Yon can carry itih tho boat, you know. "La!" said the shepherd, "do tell" "You can do more," rejoined Mercury; "vou can take over not dnly enough for your own wife and children, but enough to sell to the other shepherds. You can make them barter it for their flocks and hamlets, and you can supply the towns and villages of the surrounding country; you can make yourself a rich man." "Now, only think oftlmt!" said the shep herd. "Heaven bless your worship, there's laming" "Good morning to you," cried Mercury. "Good ntornlng to your worship," cried the swain, who was so busily picking tho fruit, that Mercury leaped dp" and was off, .before he was aware of it. "Heavens! he'sjgone!" 'said 'tho shep herd. "That fellow's a screamer; wonder wjio he is; but no matter, for it." By tho time tho sun set, he hnd a dozon loads piled up safaly on the other side of the stream. In n short timri tho rivers Were covered Viihj-boats. Mercury chuckled over the success of his plan. At length n rich Phtc iftciari built a vessel, vith Which he deter mined to cross to a neighbouring country. All the gods watched tho enterprise with interest, and Ncptiiho with indignation. '1110 vessA was built, laiinchod, rigged, manned, and a party of tho ovncr's friends camd on board to put forth. It was the first time the sea had ever been profaned by mortal presence. X confused horror per vaded ino deep. 1 no nereides anu tritons shook with fear; the sea monsters rose from their dark abysses to the surface of the water and tumbled about in agitation; whilo Neptune, calling around him all his fircc, whipped up his terrified dolphins and star tled steeds, determined 0 execute venge ance on each oVic of tho rash mortals who dared to intrude into his solemn dominion. Tho adventurers put forth. They wcro no sooner embarked than the tempest was loosened the billows rolled in liquid mountains the wind blow a hurricane the frail boat was enveloped in foam, and half-buried beneath the briny deep. Nep tune swore great guns. At length the clouds cleared away, the laughing; bluo sky appeared, and tho waves subsided. "So, he!" said Neptune, nearly out of breath, taking off his tarpawling hat and hanging it on one of the corners of his cha riot; "let them put that in their pipe and smoke it." What was his astonishment on behol ding the bark still floated safely 611 tho bo som of the ocean, and that the mariners, having furled the sails during the gale, were now unfolding them to the gentle zephyrs which wafted them directly on their course. "My eyes!" said the frowning god, "you don't say sol We'll try you another tack, then! Tnton3, ncieidcs, nymphs, attend! those detestable and audacious mortals come in spite of me; down with the intru ders into my kingdom. Each become in visible, each select your victim, and strike, with your unseen power, every mother's son of them." The unsusncctimr hldrtals w advanced; tho fatal, spirits surrounded the vessel the crow and passengers were aban doning themselves to gaiety; when lo! the dreadful signal was givon; the curse of tho god descended; the strength forsook their limbs; the blood left their.checks and lips; 1. ' .1 I . .... . . ul-.hu was in meir nearis: 1 no declc was covcreu wnn uie oouios o t ic exnmntr J -3 wretches, when Mercury, who had been on a distant expedition, suddenly perceived What was going on, darted to Jupiter with the velocity of light, knelt and praydd for tho dbilveranco of his proteges I cannot undo that which my roval brother has done in his own kingdom," said Jupiter. "Then, oh! ancst his hand," cried Mer cury; "at least spare their lives," His tears moved the omnipotent fuler of all things. "Bo it so," he said; "they shall not die! let tlicnt live And the next moment Urn winged messenger of heaven was in the chariot of the ocean god. "Oh ho! you havo come, old Beeswax, havo you? but you are a little late in tho day," cried Neptune, with a grilh smild "Belay your jaw," replied Mercury, "iinow mat mere is a limit even to your power; they shall not dio It is the decree at i . .1. ' 1 1. of Jupiter, "I am satisfied," said Neptune, who had been rcgarbing the agonies of his victims; ''I am satisfied; let them live; much good may it do them. When thuy first appear ed on my free and untrodden billows. thought death was their only doom; but see there is a worse penalty. Fool! these wretches arc praying for death to release ihem from sufferings more than infernal r 11 .1 ...i .. uc uiein uve, men. inoy shall never find that sweet icposo under my hand; but mark me, they shall not, in after ages, in trudo with impunity into my empire. 1 command you, spirits of the deep, to hov er ever over tho borders of mv realm watch the appearanco of these hardy ad venturers; strike theril with hoirors that shall mako death a vain hope a fruitless prayer, Bend thojr proud souls to ac knowledge our power, Let them feci th presence 01 an insulted god. Laugh at their livid lips, their blanched chcoks their glassy and upturned eyes, their trembling and sickning frames. Mock their groans and add to their despair. Let that which has been their delight become their horror, I worfto titan poison; and let the beverags whirih generally inspires them with rap. to'fcf, nnwVnnkb them faint to think of it. Let them experiunco all tho anguish and agony of death, without its relief, and suf fer the tortures of Tartarus, ovc'ii surroun ded by the luxuries of earth. JiOt their an guish be without sympathy among each othcrbut lot cruel laughter ring in their ears, tilt tho scoffer, 111 his return, faVls be neath my power. Tho fates decree that I cannot cxehnlo them from thp sea; but I (i can punish their unhallowed boldness. I curse them with sea-sickness! and so bo they cuVsed." Mercury was about to reply, when h? h'eard Jupiter roaring for5 a goblet of nectar, Knowing his royal master to be somewhat impatient in disposition, and not feeling dis posed to take a good licking, ho was obli ged to hasten bVick to heaven as fast as pos sible. Jlalionalc of Seduction. Much of our morality (prudent and right upon system) with Vcspcct to hc first false step of wo men leads us, as we all know, into barba rous 'errors as to individual exception. When from pure and confiding love that first false step has been taken, many a woman has been saved, in after life, from a thousand temptations: The poor unfor tunates who crowd our streets and thdatrcs, havo rarely, in the fir3t instance, been cor rupted by love, but by tho poverty and the contagion of circumstance and'bxample, It is a miserable cant phrase to call them the victims of ecduclion; they have been 10 victims of hunger, of vanity, of cuiios- ly, of evil female counsels; but tho scducts a ttjc oi vice. It a woman lias once really loved, tho beloved object makes an impenetrable barrier between her and other men; their advances terrify and revolt; sho would rather die than bo unfaithful even to memory. Though man loves the sex, wo men loves only the individual; and tho more she loves him, the more cold she is to tho species. For the passion of woman is In tho sentiment, the fancy, the heart. It rarely has much to do with the coarse mago with which boys and old men tho xperienced and the worn out connect it. liuhuer's Enst Maltrawtrs. One ofitliB neatest rilarriago epigrams we have seen, is tho following Written on tho , occasion of 'A mikriage between Charles Headache and Mary WdHunan of Philadel phia. "Nay smile not, fimpcrhot ye ftlr, Fdr mocking' s catching bo bewaro In timo tako warning , Not the first Woiikmax'b the, sweet rylph! 'Who went well pleased to rest poor elf! And with a Headache found herself Irt bed next morning. JboDc and Law. A young lawyer, who ad long paid his court to a lady without much advancing his suit, accused her, one day, of" being insensible to the power of love." "It does not follow," she archly replied, "that I Hilt so, becauso I am not to be won by the power of attorney." "Forgive me," replied the suitor, "but you should remember that all the vbtaries of Cupid ard solicitors" Jl Slattern. She is all grease, and I know not what uso to put her to, but to make a lamp of her, and run from her by her own light, I warrant her rags and thd tallow in them, will burn a Poland winter; If sho lives till Dooms-day. she'll burn a week loligb'r tltarl (he whole world. Bravery. Greene, of the Boston Mor ning Post, says that ono day while ho was absent, a party of brave fellows went to his dwelling house aud saluted tho females within it with threo groans, but when his youngest boy opened the door to ask them to walk in, they all run await. They needn't have been freightencd, for the lad says ho didn't intend to hurl'cm. Ciioosinoa Wife. A father being as ked by a sober young man, how ho should chbbsca wife, ho answered him thus- When you sec a flocks of maids together, run blindfold among them, and wholrfeso over you catch, lot her bo your wife The young man told him that if ho did so h5 might bo deceived, So you may( cried tho old man, if your eyes wero open, fbr iri the choice of a wife yciu must not trust your own eyes. A down-east paper says, "an ass is an ass still, though you label hlrtt 'horse'' from" the snout to tho end of his tail." Can thiaf bu contradicted f Transmute the most savotv food inia
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