fire Tioga flouuTy ~&gllkfsrr^ By M. H. COBB. . I Published every Wednesday morning and m« il( a to nhscriberr at ON® DOLLAB AND FIFTY .OBUXS !“r year, always ™ ADVANCE.' J ' ' -;** • f Ito piper i» sent postage free to coanty itibSeri-* bors, though they may receive their mail atposiofficai jjoj’tei in counties Immediately adjoining, folloave- Agitato a is tUo Official paper of TitnaCo., an d circulate' in'every neighborhood' therein; flub— scnptions being on the advance pay system, it circu ities among a close most to the interest of advertisers , 0 reach. Terms tu advertisers as Liberal as these nf [erl d by any paper of equal circulation in Stfnpifu Pennsylvania. ' ft j - a cross on the margin of a paper, sent let thsttbe subscriptionis about To expire. Papers will be stopped when the sabed rint ,on time expires, unless the ngcnf orders their ccnffiu-- snce.. ..I j 1- JA S. tOWBEI dc S. F. WILSOIL i TtOBNETS h COUNSELLORS att LAW, Jj. trill attend the. Courts of Tioga, Potter and McKean iSblhrties.— - -[Wellshoto.ijah, 1., JBCS.] JOBH I. MITCIIEtL. ;■ Attorney I'nd ‘ couNsstior ar-£aw., Tioga Village, Tioga County, Penn’a.; ? Prompt' attention to-Collections. • i ; p £ March 1. ISfifl.-ly. ft WIIiES,: : ATTORNEY & COUNSELLOR AT~L‘ji K ' Wellsbprh, Tioga Fa-, , f Having been speciallylicensed by-the United!" tales for the Prosecution of Claims for Pensions,^j*Sack attdation 4 Gaff tallness.' ' J- B. NIJ Weilsboro, Feb. ' pfiNNSYLTAIfIA HOUSE, : cO B!fSR-oK she AVAi-pE, Wellsboro, Pa. * " ’ •<* , r j AV. BIGONY, Proprietor. THIS popular Hofei, Having been;refitted and re-furnished throughout, is now,open to the pttMic'ova fii'et-ehjs hopse. . ; [Jn.n.,l,~l^S.] D. HART’S HOTEL. WELLSBORO, TIOOn-CO. RENi-hb. ■, THE subscriber't'a'kee.lbia method to infirm bit old friends and customers that be bits re amed the condaat -of -the -eldCrystal Fountain EFotei,'” end will hereafter give it his entire attention. Thankful fer post favor*, he solicits a renewawf the swoe . DAVID HAjftT. Wellsboro, Nov. 4, 1863.-ly. - ~ ' IZAAK WALTON HOUSE,; t Gaines, Tioga County, Pa. / I - H. C. VE RMI LYE A,i........... [Proprietor. THIS 1b a new hotel looatad-within easy ac cess of the he'll Belling and hunting grounds -In Northern Pennsylvania.’' No pains willjonspatfd for the accommodation of pleasure seekers and*th» Jrav ellingpublio. • [Jan. 1, Id ii.] ; ■ l‘. FOIBI, __ Watches, Clocks, Jewelrv, &c„ tc., REPAIRED rAT OLD PRICES. ~ POST OFFICE BDItOIISG, ' NO: 5, UNfON _BLf>CK r ./ Wellsboro, May 20, 1863. ' '/ ' H. W.'WU.MAi'*; ' ' ’ ■■»». HL bMiTn. WILLIAMS Sc, SMITH, ATTORNEYS'AND "COVASELOJIS AT-L’a W, BOUNTY &.PK9HOH AGENCY. ' Main Straet. Well»boro, Pa. , * JanuarylB6s-ly, ; S. F. SBAIBLIS, BARBER & HAIR-DRESSER f Shop £s*s Cj Stobb-.V ■ Wellsboro, Deo V, 1861., ' ■ WESTERN JEXCBAHOF k*g&YILLE. PA v . , THE undersigned having leased the above Hotel for a term'of years would .respectfully ; inform the traveling public that be bus pdf’ tbe Hotel.in first class order for tbe reception of guests and no .pains will be scared in the'accommodation ef travelers and as far as the' situation will-allod.-he -will kemixH first class Hotel, in all things, except piices, will be modetate. Please try ns and judge for yon Selves. Knoirille. oet.l9,nB#4i--l£i - J. H. MAH [IN- i HEVEKCE STA3I PS. 7 - JOHN M. PHELPS, Deputy Collector ft)f« Mans field, has just received a large lot of , E avenue Slams, of all denominations, frpm one cent u>to ffi. Act person wishing Stanps cap get them at, oape in Mansfield, or of M. B DLLABD, Assistanti «d*sor, at Wellshoro, Pa.;, . , -- _ . ,J- M..PHIPPS. / Mansfield, 'May 2,186 f - ‘ J f \ P. I»EWfiIiL,J!E!«TIST j.-. . j MANSFIELD, TIOGA CUUIFPT^A.', IS prepared- ,all t\a in the yarioua jiepartmettta of filling, extracting, m genicg artificial clentureV Ac. * Mansfield, August 10, 18M-ly, weli^boro7 c^Bs9P!|^ j (Corner and the Aeenie.7 , *■' *■ "WAttBBOBO, /Pi/. A/ ’ B. B, HOLlDAylPropriafprf One sf the most popqlar, Hooats m,tW coanty-. This Hotel is the principal Stage-house in W IHsboro. Stages leave'daily aa followsi ;' _. - -■ , ' For Tioga, at 9a. m.; For Troy, at' B i. 11-J :For Jersey Shore every Tuesday and P- m.. For Condersport, every Monday and at 2 Stages Arrive—From Tioga, at 12 J-2 .o ctoA p. m. ; From Trby.at’6 -o'clock p. m.: Frotg_der;ey Shore,-Tuesday and Friday Jl,a. m. :;FrtutCouders porh Monday and Thursday Xl.a-m- ' T.-R.—Jimmy -Cowd'an, vha - well-khp«n hostler, trill is found;on hand, Wellsboro, Oct. 5, 1864-Iff. jfe. HUGH YQIIK^ BOOKSELLER & STATItSEB, i)(.B DBA IB* ,IN* American Clicks, American, English, £td Bwies .Watches, Jewelry, Silrer Plated Ware, Shades, Picture Frames, Photographic Albums;;S£e scopes, Microscopes, Perfumery, Yankee Notions * r.isbing ■T-eek-U and.Elies,,and Fancy and Toilet AUues* BODIES of every Irtpd * in the County, constantly on hand and sentry fhi u orp.tn ertrige,-to orders ' 'V. NO. 6, ONION BLOCK, WELLSBOfQ PA., FOE.SALEI— HOUSE i. LOT on ML fa Street, adjoining'“Wright * Baiiey’s'Store. •,# acres ul laud in Delmor, between-John -Gray and fl* jrncK.. House and Lot on Corincrton Street, c ■*': For terms, apply to HENRY SHERWOOD, Esq. W’ellebnro, May_3l, 186^—tf. Flour and feßd/buck: wheai; flour. Meal/Pork and SaU,Tea, Coffee, St jrtcf, Soap, Candles, Saleratofi, Tpbacoo-and KwfcenoXH. c ; Aieo, Mackerel. White Pish, and Trot f, by the package or 0 Wclltboio, Jnne SB, 1866. ' - PROTECTIVE WAR -CLAIM AND REHSION AGENCY OF THE U. 8. SANITARY COM MISSION.—AII the papers and correspondence re quired to procure Tensions, Bounty, sod Back. Pay, and Prize. Money for discharged SOLDIERS and SAILORS, and for the -RELATIVES of BoldiorS,ai)d Sailors doing Sn the service of the United States, prepared and forwarded, and the proceeds of all ci«ims, when collected, remitted to the parties FREE OF CHARGE. Office XSO7 Chestnut Street. Philadelphia. Or fur farther information or aasistance.-apply to Locr Mouiie Hotchkiss, WcUsboro,'. S. E. llorblS, MansfieM' ■' Associate Managers for Tioga Comity. PURE OINGBR at ■ • . ROyS- OXOG STORE. THE AGITATOR. Yoii.ni. RICHMOND HAS FALLEN 1 I DRT GOODS LEE SDRBENDERED, AND WE HAVE. SURRENDERED THE EXT- | " TEME HIGH PRICES OF ; ; ... GOODS. THE PEOPLE’S STORE,; is now receiving Additions to their stock of GOODS, BOUGHT DURING THE /L&TE , DEPRESSION IN ‘ PRICES,; • ■- * : «r and they will t>e!solff at v “ We have made arrange menta ta-get :Gooda every "week, and as wfe keep posted‘ic regard-to the Veto Tort" jfaffat, we shall at; * * - -all time* make tbe stock on hand conform to ~ ; . , : . "new prices, - * < . ‘ * i,:: u i-i - and we wish- it distinctly understood, that however ‘*.Nk • ‘much'Othersmay blow, . WE HO NOT INTEND‘ TO "BE UNDERSOLD quality of goods considered.' .It shall, he onr.ainrfo keep constantly ’onhand'agood-Stockzof. .such goods asHhe community c • require, and, . SUCH ARTICLES AS WILL -GIVE SATIBFAC- onder which our business bos constantly increased for the last ten years will be adhered to, < " as'also the ’ * ,< ■- I. more recently adopted. Don't buy until. -• TOU HAVE EXAMINED OUR: STOCK AND. - j.IT ■ ' ‘ ; STORE DIRECTLY OPPOSITE. THE DICKIN^ rfhd hrst.door east of Hutogerford’s Bank. = -SMITH & WAITE, Corning, N. Yv May 17, 18G5, THE BIG FIGHT , having been closed up Messrs. Grant, Sherman Co.,. „ . >' i; i iCE.tj.y i>S= ;- J have volunteered -for a war-nf extermination against ■ high Prices, and will be found entrenched bagETpile of r, ~ ivr. 'iV,k :;Tii v . --NEWtAND CHE>.E*.(3OODS. - i » us;-, j_ at the old OSGOOD STAND, where thclroornmnnW. tiona'witb'NbvrvTork bantiot'be Inlwhipipd. j ■They bare just received a good stock of ( | mfmmm s m&M ODS ' such at Ptln» t BelainM ( Baregee, Hosiery, Notions, Boots and Shoes, etc.7in'fact erisryfhfng in the Dry Qs°dBHne.may>io found ap.our counters/ and inttcfiised ■*» .pftceA to ihe lifte, HEAVY-FALL IN GOODS.- ‘: ; ;i ci i. . j* ~ a . ':t ■ ~ , ' We also invite purchasers to examine our See stockofi-- . ir • » GROCERIES Can't be beat this side of New if of k. ■Remember the place. " Osgood's Corner.” , 0 e ” .... V. .. .KELDtA PDRyig. Wellsboro, Apr, 22, 1865-ly. ! : i\ ,■ WATOHBS-CLO PEATEDf-WARE.— «Call at No.'S;-Untoitv,Block, if jou.-waot a good , WATCH* where sod wiluSnd a goodjjisortment of,-, - - ’ ■' (, v - ‘ ■— -Jr Z *•>.' 3C keep on tsucUE, movement in heavy Silver Caeca, which* no equal. I respectfully refePifo'vM; 3< Cobh*d»t n r Agita * tor, and Wni. Bache*/ National "Bank of Wollsboro. : Also, the W. EUery, Bartlett, Appleton,-Tracy & Co., all are good Watches. - . -Dinner dad Breakfast Castors, Dike ’Blskets, Spoon Holders, Napkin Rings, Forks, Table and Tea-Spoons, Ac., Ac., Ac. * India Rubber Chains; Bings, and Gold, rMounted Pencils. * - - '• ' - t* , . _ -s-.o s A good - assortment of "CLOCKS constantly, pn hand. ’ • * c * t,> All of which .will be sold as low as they can he bought anywhere. REPAIRING PONE ON SHORT NOTICE. , , yard—milkmaids on stools-r-geese on thexam pige—calves nn the hill-side—son at your WALTER k: WOOD’S PRIZE MOWER.—The back —none too cool—none too warm—a breeze Wood Mower has been In general nee for the takes the cheek—a color takes the phiz—a light past five years. It embraces aU the qualities neoes- takes tllß . e , HO Bließps eyes ) t h u horses take sary to make a perfect Mower. It recommends itself • . J , K r J . 7 r s\, • to every farmer for the simplicity of- its construction. ! the bit, and vre take our cigura, (On no, the It is proved to be the lightest draft. It takes the | ladies dun*t-object,* they rather* like tobacco preference for durability,easy management, and good j smoke) four miles an hour—pleasant velocity-^-* l"rs—iwce s*lls ddlvered"n°thl^cars n st Corning° a 'i f od colloquial opportunities-easy springs on- EDGAR HILL, Agent, Corning, N.-Y. , i der us, which take the • stomach ache’ out ol May _ the rough -places—narrow Beats and no crino- WeUeboro. Apg. SO, 1865-tf. EEKOSINK LAMPS *t - liae-.‘eveTJ_aH n gi*lovely and'-^erene-fara. 90^8pR0G SXOEB.: WW7 °* SetjoteQ to tfyt of tljr area of jFr«som atiD tfcc SjjreaH of Reform WHILE THEBE SHALL EE A WRONG UNSIGHTED, AND UNTIL ‘‘MAN'S INHUMANITY TO MAN” SHALL CEASE, AGITATION MUST CONTINUE. 4' Anifio bfts ti;e price of Bayard Taylor baa written' his travels, and Port Crayon and Bamom have written theirs ; so why shouldn't wo write ours ? whj> kpows, but we;- tup, may' become famous tj But . the' first-thing to know, of. course, is the names of the travelers ; they, ate welt known,— please cal) them ; Smith, Brown, and Muggins-; Smith, -Browth-and Muggins took a notion.—, They said they • would , spend an; indefinite period a tub, as mooli moneys—regardless of ex pense—and-'travel; fish,.hunt, boat and play boy promiscuously. And they did ; but mind yon/not alone, —'twouldil’t have been congen.- itif if they bad, ’no how/ .A certain amount Of-marketablecalico is always .essential to the success of the' best 4aid .schemes of. mice and men, and'then, they gang a glee— ; , , n "If yoirwill not attribute it- all to’.a foggy ref metobrance, I will state for- the uninformed; tßjit /Wellsboro is the- county seat of Tioga "County/and' erroneously supposed to.• be the seat of a great deal of attraction; and perhaps _if is, but it (the attraction) is-trahaferable and changes its base ; and in- this nota ble insfa nee, it migrated towards Putter Coun- Ty Pine Creek’is bom in'Putter .County; thkes its rise and cuts off a respectable western 'slide, of Tioga County, and buries - itself de cently "Inf the Snsquebanoay-a cannon , shi t 'ubb've~<ferBky Shore.- So ntueh -for outline ge ography. It may be well enough to state here that this excursion was undertaken as much 'for " fun, (idventure, incident,- good-obeer.rgood morals, tnusio and missionary ‘labor,-aas'.it ‘was.ftJ.purpiitee of national history, oouven- M'mal etiquette, gaatronomioal starvation . and The chances of sudden deuth hy accident,—per haps more,'but my memory is ‘not reliable on that point.' 1 know' this however; anew sen sation 5T some sort was heeded; the'restraint of business sat like a'straitjacket;. ear ca daverous corporatiop would hardly cast a shad ow, and "green and-yellow'melancholy' .was becoming 'apoplectic -on my damsskt- cheek ; and if I’d had a white horse and spunk enoogh to ride him, Milton's ‘death on the pale horse,’ would have been slicing reality.;-i so the re solve to throw off this- opiumi'e lassitude was (allowed sH-kit, by a pair of living nags and a three-seated democrat (no allusion-to politics), and the bird’thnt cStcbe.vfho early worm; saw us making tracks' for —-any plo££;whcrc we could unbosom" ouf~vests*and take our suspend ;Vrk.off. ’ " J ' 1 ’ 1 y ..I; I : ,I;, - *, y/bw'jsiftnC.peopJo ihay turn up their.etherial' nose's; and say'’fishing is ‘So very’ improper,’ ungeßna. - --- „ t ,j| ; etc., &c.,‘ Well now my good people, let me say, you are entirely '* aUCked in,’ to .use a JiuetiouT 'expression:" Nothing can be-more' pVopor or discreet,—and I will prove it. = If, j-t.ii are religously inclined, you will remem ber what Peter was doing when 'out Bold • call "etThimi ‘ Four of the twelve apostles wer&meri ! o( very ‘ taking ways,’—conning with tbe iine | and, honk. King.ilavid says too; “ They that .ftccupy, themselves in'deep'watefe,' see the won derful ivh’rks of' God.”'- HCmust have seen a, 'good many mefmaidti; TTupptaee -, but not as /many us his wise son Solomon did,- wha giv«a us .his experience in such metaphors’as hfs' former affections 'and-practices ’had- inclined him' tot 1 And by divine'appointment he wrote ‘ that spiritual'dialogue; or- holy emdrousdoVe song, the “ Canticlesin which'-ha says,; “bis beloved hucT eyetflike the fishpools of ries'hboh.”' Ahd if thut staodS to Teasbn, and T .fieiieve it does, then- vie mhy : probably ■ con clude'that the meek Moses and the bumble pro phet Amos, were buth iit times-occupied •Mike some' sedObtary frog ’' because ■ fish hooks are only, twn:e ! mehtioried in the “ Old Testament and everybody, knows that Muses took:a'fiah-. ing excursion the first'firing after he was born, with PburoaVa daughter, down o'fi the Nila.— Jonuti was some in this line too; hut he didn’t ■pay much attentiemTo 1 small fry be ’went in,lemons,’ even at the'risk of coming out squeezed it took him three days' tb 'Bring one whale ‘ tohis stomach,'—the toughest Customer' bf,' hut he brcmghfhim up.— Good for • Mark "Antony and,’ Oleopa tru, and that in~the midst ufe theit-wonderful glory/ uaell lo'fish sotne. ;Bg't she generally, jiad the best luck. William" Stihkespear or bays, shgionoe caught a salt fish id freeh water. Anglingfsan appro niulftftjjd gious reoreatiup for clergyman. “It is an* employmcut fnr idle- time, a vest'- to the mind, a cbcejrer of ,the spirits, a diverter.- of sadness, a calmer of'unquiet thoughts, a mod- j papeiops.'.'a-'propurer-yrf contented-’ nessl Begetting habits of great' patience and peace of mind.” And let me tell you that in the Scripture, fishing is always’ taken- in :tl»e beat.sense ; s which Ido rather believe. It is fitf6r the obntcmplttfion4J the ipgst prudent,] and pious,, and peaceable of men—and the soft ■ sos'tW/Jdodkir the at Cur nob, balm of Gilead 1 for .the gizzard, and altogether lovely laf 'H , sweet disposition therefore dbn’the-ashamed to oultiviuo 'h ■fiatural teete Tor piscatorial: ex-" ercise, even thongh-y«n -should --.sometimes he r- J ,■ . “yourself takoniu.’ '' ■. JC ? a -Fiom : Wfllsboro, west Ward; hob over This" " "hllia nnu tliraugit the valleys, lies the-road, to lire life Creek'' trout -fiaheriCe.-' "IXSit know anything abnptJtJ. You ought to knowi Aliof life is unknown to you till you do"; but descrip ! ti jb fails me—language fails entirely to come to time; My advice to all is; go and do like wise.. The early morning air—dew ’on the grass-7-birds ,in the trees —cows in the barn- SHE LOWEST MARKET RATES.- , - HEGAEDEESg OF COST, BY L lION.TO THE CONSUMER, THE ONE PRICE, SYSTEM ' READY PAY SYSTEM PLATED WARE. - JEWELRY OF AEL kINDS, W^LLSBQRO f TI(|GA .COUNTY. P A.. WEDNESDAY MORNING* SEPTEMBER 20, 1865. A , } . M t - <•-*- * .1 IV AKf r\ ~ -A* FOLfirY* . tommuiticatiott. [Written for The Agitafof.j rtoogins ON FISH. FIRST. PAPER. gan sympathises—and—and—-but whyi follow up this ..strain? Can unwritten music end poetry in the bud, reach the. senses through a newspaper article ? Scarcely. Not much. It wants ‘blue and gold.’ Shall therefore let you fiU out a blank requisition on your imagir nation for the rejt, reserving one blank for my self.l .Ten milep are up—so is the sun—except those that have wilted—mercury still in ascension— horses nodding to every oat field—■ Muggins: “ Sp'oze we 'stop.” ■ Bf’wn “Stop'what? haint done-anything I'm ashamed of;" ■:, ;, . ~ , • Smith : 11 Whoa—whoa—steady whoa— up !" • Hoggins:. “ Hello there !" Stranger:-. “ Hello yourself I" ' J Smith : : “ , ‘Wadt to Stop With you awhile.— Feed our horses ; get - jTomothThg to eat, and a room for'six, —ean we (do it?" - “ Stranger: • “ Reckon how as if yet mongfat, providinyotl’uus have bronght.a)ong your own grulfjand things; ■Wo’uns.aint much on sioh like—we’nns baint. ,My old woman kin tote tbo.projui'e out of the and give y6t right smart chance to range' ■yerfcßlves, I rfeck bn ” So that is Settled : weshell oat; the cage go bottom of tb'eir-ont b&xos with a relish that Speaks, well for their digestive powers-; ■while we looked about for au adventure, fo> Junes bad told”us they grew on trees about there. ’"A boat ride! a boat tide !’•’■-is the unanimous chords; while the" wingless angels olap'their. hande'in ecstatic; delight, and the inale cattle, grunted, their approval. Haifa mile below was the deep.hole.- so was the boat —bjjf between us and there, were' riffles, arid the water, like our financial pile, was low. For tunately ‘ -however, Smith- knows how jo double-quick (and so do Brown and Muggins, -as. to that, .hut their-dispasitions are more quiet) and he breaks away, down, the. bonk, at a tear ing trot, while we follow sedately and decorous ly on at a meek and solemn pace. ’ A splash and a shout; and Smith appears on the riffled— a Id mule on - the 1 canal ankles exposed. Perseverance and muscle bring him into deeper water,,and,the shout: ship ahoy ! brings him to shore.. <• ..Brown; “Why yes, ladies, step right in; never mind a few inches' Of water—l'll vouch for its purity—tho’ I can’t Teoommend .it as a a beverage—it-will do for navigation, however, jump in, jump ip ..i.. Now a boat istt good thing to have in the country, especially if there is any water about. .But sieves are exclusively for Btraihingpnhkin sauce', and r our party representing the'cabbage and squash fraternity,-we had noifoedbr-seiyes, and at boat wjtb ,a briatol board ,bottom isn’t I apt to sjvim much.better than a nutmeg grater— ! filKtf if Uak JKof JiL iKix" VkfiUnannhc of ooate. ' SSj when Smith canaled oor ola -craft out into the stream, and the water began to bobble through the, wormholes, and signs of mesmerism began to appear, in the boat, and things began to look hysterioy, hypochondri oal, if not lugubrious—and'the crazy old thing sunk' like a stone to the bottom on a riffle, amid the-beart-rendihg and ear-splitting screams of mortal fright and distress from the ladies — God bless, them I .You ought to have seen the .death agony and other contortions of Muggins who sat high and dry on shore—on shore be cause, being spooney bn water," lie had declined ' taking's SSdt intwo raobee of it; all on account of his good clothes, frail and delicate ,constitu tion, and nervous-sensibility,-Muggins's agony. -J 1 ware orfull' He essayed^to fly out .to the shipwrecked party—but hia wings wouldn’t work j . and hie Ma. bad often told him he I mustn’t go in the water barefooted, 01! other-- I wise, and must'always keep his feetout of sight, in company—and Mbggins - always minds his 'mother, when she knows, he’s ont;. and tho’ the flesh was. weak, the spirit, was willing to do the fair thing—but parental authority tri umphed, pnd Muggins sat 'still."' What 'else could be do? be yfas completely gumarabiced to a big atone, by his fright, eo that wasa ‘ sure thingbhhlm '/’ and he hadino big brother or other near relative^any-,other man. to send in, for he wouldn’t objected to that—so,bo was quiteiheljpleea. But something must be done ; one end of the boat remains out of water, and oh it the ladies huddled like a - flock of-fright ened sheep—i. e. lamba. .-Smith, in- stentorian tones is singing. the “.Duxology,” whije Ilrown, in n,. BU Ppj‘ant attitude, with a look of heavenly' concern, (like unto a dying lobster) and eyes in a fine frenzy rolling, (like unto two'onions in a pot) bands clasped reverently oil his flat but sensitive bosom,'-(like unto a saw burse) was doing his-best in a sulemnoolic. endeavorto re peat-the Lord’aPrayer ;'' lJ -... .. “-Now I lay me dywn. to aleep; I pray tlm Lordnly snultokecp; - ’TP labonM die before I waka r ” • , . , ~ ; j 0 Lori remember me! ’ - - But the case is desperate-critical—alarm ing—the old.scow declines to float—one’end la under—sink, swim or‘wade are 1 the only alter natives. Smith offers himself hs pack-saddle and yullantly proposes to tote the party,ashore. Bfowu ’ holds'his breath, and-Muggins resur rects, -otily. To collapse -again.unijer tho contin ued excitement on his nervous system—the ladies decline the pack-saddle—hold a council of war on their own responsibility—adopt the undress uniform, and decide' to wade, Because necessity is' then mother of .-invention. , Smith goes to shore with the ‘foot-gear—Brown ban dages .hi 3.,eyes, not blind, but inquisitive to.see —commonly called windows of the'soul—Mug gins spreads' bis handkerchief over his bead, being 'harefnl to .put the holes-where he can’t see-through. I might draw , the curtain here -oyer the whole scene, but although we were on the retfeat, I shan’t raise the white flag if oth ers do ; and besides, my solemn oath as histo rian, compels me to tell ' the truth, the whole troth and) nothing but the truth.’ | Several minutes of torturing suspense follow. You feel affectionate, but you can’t tell why— because you can’t see. Then you feel miserable ali-tbe way through—as if an.ounce of quick silver had started from your big toe and was looking after your organ of veneration. You still think yourself alive however, and if so, wish to remain. You’ piotnre to yourself that paradise. liei jusTciii the other side of your handkerchief. Tantalizing, provoking, aggra vating 1 know, hot you must be oblivious for a season, lou will, of -course, remember Keats’ description of Magdeline, and ten to one, re peat it aloud: • *•' By degrees Her rich attire creepsrnatling to her knees; Half-hidden, like a mermaid in sea-weed. Pensive, awhile she”— wades I . Imagination will-paint some suob.pictnre—of course you ahoul£ not: but the probability is TOu-will.-. Yes, von will think of mermaids, and wish yourself almost any kind of a sea ttfoff ster—even an imperceptible sucker, in trans parent waters You would like to know how cold you are, and would ask for a.themometer to find out: and when you find the weather a good deal ojlder than you suppose it was, you will feel-surprised—yon will not understand it; there is something mysterious in it. Yon would like to be invisible—you would like to be im macnlate,.so you wouldn’t have to be band aged—you would like to realize the imaginary picture on your retina—you would like to see. Smith’s trowserloone, at this.point, started on i visit to his ooat-oollar, butdidn’t get there on account of the human, forked-radish prin ciple. I felt as if pedal extremities were grow ing out of me, on. the principle of a hub in a wagon wheel: while -Brown, with tears in his voice, said he couldn’t see it;” and he couldn’t be expected to. ,But'a scream and a splash is beard. - -Brown and Muggins take off their band ages. They never did a more injudicious.thing; I—they -were astonished, petrified. thanderstruok, wild with mortifioationj-rtwhat-had happened? why SoHtbpupfchaiiing-tbsfear—of a-bandaga before bis eyes—rash and inconsiderate youth 1 had .rescued ene-of the mermaids from the boat, and in a hereto attempf'to carry the amphibious biped to the shore his visible means of support gave way and down came Smith, mermaid and all—in ten inches of_water, not ten feet from shored—all purely accidental design of coarse. But I object. lam a nervous man, and the least noise disturbs me. lam also very im pressible—all nervous tjmn are. I did not con sider if proper or. polite to fall-down under such circumstances, especially . where hoops are con cerned. I did not know what the reason was— it made no difference,what it was—there could tie no reason, that could, by any possible soph estry, be made to sanction such infelicitous conduct: yet— -11 What monarch hnt would give his crown . - His arms might do what"— his—haddone And yet Smith knew: ' “ Her heart—it was anothers." 2} '•> ■ . My excessive modesty, wont permit me to jdweUupon-tlus ineffable scene; ao Miss Hosmer will haive to get other models for her Greek stave." Smith's feelings found vent in the query; -• yTow’ifieo'irTftl ’ft secret sympathy '} Is there some loving spirit shrined in thee V* Muggins— -0 it’s the ankles, whiter than descending snow, 1 think, Smith, makes you feel so. ' Brown : Say, fallows, I want to go home I Smith : If ignorance is this, J tU folly to be Wise., 1 Brown; . 0 that a glasee of heavenly day Had taken that stubborn rag away! Had a stamp speech been asked now of Muggins, lie would ffnve-felt like delivering himself thus ; , Ladies and Gentlemen: .An idea’s strnck me. (Hurt you much f) Shall Igo on, or subside T\ (Go on I) I say lam the recipient of'air idea—original too. '(Who’s it-original with?) ; In order to oome down to the level of your comprehension,! will call the science I am about,.to delineate—pedology. (What’s that?) Well, gentlemen, if I am to famish you with ideas, and brains to understand them, and be dictionary too, perhaps you’d better bind"me in calf, and torn over my'leaves to suit yourselves., (You’re already bound in calf!) Podology, ladies and gentlemen, is the converse, or antithesis, or the other extreme of Phrenology. It is the art of judging of char acter by the feet, or pedal extremities, and is closely andJihtTmately'cpnnected with Ankle ism and Calfologjr '(O Lud, 0!) Illiterate -persons might suppose that the term I make nse of to designate this science, referred to the human body because the syllable ‘ pod’ occurs in it, and because some bodies ate nods, with out any stem or fruit—useless. But no, air; it refers to the human foot divine, and under lies every other system founded on the human system. Why, you will .find that Podology is at the bottom of you all, and rests-upon a foundation broad enough to last a lifetime ; and my very solemn conviction is that it’s bound to i kick ail other ologiea higher than a kite. (Air ye in dead yearnest?) Ad libitum, I will now come to the point of my theory ; sic transit! (Sic who ? are we dogs 1 hist! we’ll hear some thing bilious on the big toe now.) If I were called upon, gentlemen, to say what was your great special characteristic I should say Podol ogy, at once ; not so much in the immensity of size, as of extent —filling the mind with the same order of emotion that the- ocean does, with this difference: that yours, Smith, is the webfooted Podology, while yours, Brown, is t)ie gigantic pedal, rose geraneum Podology— like in kind, but differing in color and odor iferousneas. ' Good I good I’ ■ How. dearie is I’ '/ Clear as mud 1’ /.What a figurative style 1’ ‘Cots a big figure I’ ‘ Fine; what a fool-killer he’d make!’ • How he accomnlates it on ’em 1' . ‘ Piles the agony 1’ ‘ Hist 1 he’s, about to touch on something pro found.' My gentle hearers, my heantiful system of Podology telle me that the big toe is a certain forerunner of the whole human family; and : like John the Baptist, points ont the way in i which you must follow, or fall from grace into te-ioe-tal depravity I Nextly: Show me a man with his heel going back on him, and I will show you a human blue Jay, or a horticultural heliotrope. A thick foot indicates great similari ty in the bead. A broad foot shows a substan tial understanding, and, please Crispin, ptovid* Rates of AdFertlalng, Advertisements will b« charged 91 par square of 10 'line*, oneictertion, and 91.00 for three insertions. Advertisements of less than 10 Uses bomidtftd u a square. The subjoined rates trill bo charged fur Quarterly, Half-Yearly and Yearly adeem laments: 1 Square,, 2 do. .. 3 do. 1 Column, 1 do. 1 do. Advertisements not naving the number of inser tions desired marked upon them, will be published until ordered out and charged accordingly." Posters, Handbills, 8111-Heads, tetfor-Heads, and all kinds of Jobbing done in country establishments, executed neatiy and promptly.- Justices’, Constable's and other BLANKS, constantly on band. NO. 5. log it don’t exhaust bis stock and ha don't have' to go oat doors to make a pit, A bigb instep is apt to get its back up. A foot in length, indicates tbat the owner is long for this world, A bony foot is strongly suggestive of anatomy: while a foot of flesh, is sometimes bootless, bat ought not to be if ita embonpoint ia sufficient to suggest blabber. A woman’s foot is sup posed to be smaller than ‘any other man's’—bat that rests upon hypothesis, (or some other sis) and the intermediate nnmbers, from 9 to 14: while a man is supposed to stand on his taps, except when he’a on his dignity. Opinions differ as to the toe nails—some call them ‘red, white and blue,’ while others oall them ‘black and blue,’ and others, brown; I shall not venture a decisive oppinion on this fastidious and delicate point, unless I say the term 'earthy* covers the whole ground. Dirty feet indioaM great benevolence and much modesty and ohria* tian resignation. To ‘foot up’ means division of fractions invert the divisor; while the term ‘ Kick up,’ sometimes means to got yourself knocked down. A leaky boot or shoe some times brings a dampness over .the frail spirit of Pedology; whereas, a hole in your stocking is an open shame, therefore, let ventilation be confined to the hat and elbows ; all of which is respectfully submitted, and bears directly or indirectly on my unsurpassed theory of Ped ology, which is generally estimated by the foot; but if any of you wish to patronize by the yard just hand in your measure, to “ Sears & Co.” O ye of Ifttle faith 1 O human ingratitude 1 Incredulous beings ! Human cattle 1 Can't I penetrate your craniology ? Nothing in Pedolo gy, do you say ? Why look around you as you stand. The refutation of your foolish disbe lief is before your eyes. Look at that beautifol foot and, ( Ah, I like to have said ankle,) there in the mirage ! What have yon to say to the perfect symmetry of the ravishing picture I its seductive sinuosities, swells and vales,'per fection of outlines, perspective, and all that, looming up to the eye, more luminously as yon concentrate your gaze and think of Cinderilla; visible only it is true, to the imagination—ideal, and the bean ideal of all that is possible,for Palmer. And if such a seeming foot will nat orally arise to the eye here in the mountains— naturally, because the result of natural causes, what though in absolute fact there be no foot— what if it is all illusion, hallucination—all in your eye, as the vulgar say I It is only your reasoning mind that tells you this. The imag inative mind tells yon there is a foot; one part of your intellect says there ia not, another Bays there is,—which do you believe ? Most undoubt edly, as far as the present picture is concerned, the one that tella your senses that here before you stands the foot. And here to all intents and purposes, it does stand, apparent before , you in all its magnified glory, such as can onlv Knman Ksains a nrl nf ) oJer order; compared to wnioß, oojomon to i'i all his glory, did not amonnt to grass;—and here I rest the vindication of Podology. “ Don’t go in any deeper. Hoggins, or the subject will swim yon." " Let him pitoh in; it's good wading all about where ho is.” Gentlemen all this repeated oank about Podology is not true! in fact—not even a phys iognomical faot. But what if it were ? Yes,. gentleman, wbatif it were ? And thisqaestion brings me to the giat of the matter. If you don't put on yonr shoes and stockings, I’ll publish yon all in the next Agitator 1 “ It’s a slaughter of the innocents !" “ It’s great spouting!" , “ A whale’r 1” “ What a senator he’d make I" “ Hain't he high-strung ?" “ A-eharp is G-flat.” “What a tremendous effort!” ’ 11 Prodigious I" "Ponohons!" ( He's discombobberated ’em 1” “ Explunotified ’em 1” 1” “ All to smashes V’ ‘‘How's your epiglottis |f" V How's your diaphragm?” “ How are yon Podology ?” Thus endetfalthe first chapter. , iThe theory of the poet Gray, that undevloped Hampdens, Miltons and Cromwells lie moulder ing in many a village graveyard, is a very pretty one and may be true. The ’ world, however, can only judge of a man’s capabilities by what he says and does, it rightly prefers the man of small talent who makes occasion for its exer cise, to the mental giant, whose intellect lies dormant until occasion wakes it up. Latent Genius that can only be called into action by a rare combination of exciting circumstances, is of less practical value to mankind and to its owner, than mediocre ability with plenty of spontaneous energy behind it. We could put our ten gar upon man; individ uals of very moderate intellectual calibre, who have left greater minda hull down in t bait wake in the race for fortune and even fame. The success* of such men is due to their motive pow er. The public to them as “perfect steamboats and, practically speaking,' they are worth all the gifted do-nothings that ever lived or will live. Ton may call them fools if you will, but they achieve their objects, and not nufrequently extend a helping band to lag gards of a higher order of talent, but of less energy and determination than themselves. | These facts—and we all know by onr daily experience that they are facts—are consoling to persons in whom ordinary capacity is com bined with irrepressible pluck and indomitable perseverance—men, who, as Billy Black saya in the farce, “ never give nothing up.” Really great men, however; those who make their mark upon the age in which they live and survive it in history, are a class of beings of a different order. A strong intellect, high moral qualities, and energy commensurate to their lull development, are the elements of true great ness, and whoever possesses these best gifts of God to man, is indeed'*' only a little lower than the angels." Alas! like Angel's visits the ad vent of such benefactors of their race are “ few and far between; and, when most needed, we' too often look for them in Tain." 3 itosTng, 6 M 05133, 13 aoara*. ....$4.00 $5.76 97.60 .... 0,00 3.25 10.00 .... 8.75 10.75 13.40 --.10.00 12.00 16.78 .....18.75 25.00 31.80- ....80.00 43.00 00.00 Talent and Energy.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers