Tiie Forest Republican la published every WednosJay, by J. E. WENK. Offlo ia feme&rbanfrh & Co.'i Building ELM STREET, TfOXESTl, TA. Terms, - PerVenr, 50 subscriptions received for a shorter period than three months. Correspondence sollolte 1 frOTii all parts of tha couuiry. No noiio will be taken of nnonymoui oonimunloailons. RATES OF ADVERTISING l One Square, one Inch, one insertion..! 100 One t-'quare, one inch, on month. .. 8 on One Square, one inoh, three months. . A 00 One Square, one inch, one year,..., 10 0) Two Squares, one yeir 1-500 Quarter Column, one year,,,., S ) 00 naif Column, one year SO 00 One Column, one year 100 00 Leeal advertisements ten cents per line each insertion. Marriages and deith notice gratis. A II bills for yearly advertisement collected quarterly Temporary advertisements must lie paid in advance. Job work cub on deliver. ORES UBLICAH. VOL. XXX. NO. 41. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, JAN. 20, 1898. SS1.00 PER ANNUM. Rep 3T Mnlhall estimator tbat the civilized nations pay annually $13,700,000,000 for food. Secrotary Cuhurn, of the Kansas Board of Agriculture, declares that the' farmers of tbat State are $40, 000,000 richer than they were a year go. Tho Sultan has forbidden the nee of the bicycle in Turkey, on the ground that it "is immoral and dangerous to the State." Home enterprising manu- faoturer would probably be able to overcomohis Majesty's objections to tho wheel by presenting him with a revised edition of a "bicycle built for two" a bicycle built for a harem, -- i- In a .gonenlogical way tho funniest thing on record is tbat Menolik, Negus of Abyssinia, insists on his descent in a straight line from Solomon and the Queen of Sheba. If this were ques tioned the august Negus would have your head cut off, or if you hinted that there was a bar sinister somewhere you might be impaled. There is, however, a noble family iu France, the Counts of Noe, who show on their family blazon the Ark and that most adventurous voyager, Noah, and they claim that veteran seaman as their re mote ancestor. American labor is acknowledged to be more efficient than tho labor of any other country. We are fortunate ia ' tho possession of a class of skilled mechanics who are endowed with suf- 'flciont brains and alertness to quickly master the most intricate machines. Our common school system, which has been maintained for 100 years, has laid tho foundation of superior averago intelligence, and our numer ous excellent scientific schools and schools of technology have given great opportunity to boys of a practical and mechanical turn of mind. Says the Now York Times: A con temporary states that it is safer to be convicted murderer iu the United States thau an innocent man, and submits these data as proof: Not one convicted murderer in fifty is hanged or killed by electricity; of the men lynched a much larger proportion than 1 iu CO was innocent. We have no means at baud for verifying theso figures, nor are we able to determine what proportion of tho population are convicted murderers or what propor tion are unjustly executed. The con clusion, merely from casual observa tion, seems plausible; the logic is Bound. Still, if it be not too optimis tic, wo should like some more data to guide us." After all, schools are the greatest civilizers, exclaims the New York Mail and Express. Secretary Bliss, of the Interior Departmon!, reports 28,030 Indian children enrolled in tho schools last year. Tribal relations nro being broken up and Indian la'ids divided lutxTsoveralty. The aborigine, how ever has not yet been educated up to the point of holding on to ths laad, and as a consequence it soon passes Into the hat) Ja of his white brothers, notwithstanding the paternal restric tions thrown round him by the gov ernment. ' Tho Indiau h not yjt learned the necessity of promptly meeting taxes, and owing to his failure to ooine to time with respect to this exaction, a considerable a.nouut of his lands, in Minnesota, passed from him last year. Until our red brother learns f?Jt taxes are as certain as that other certain thing, death, he should have some special provision in law fur his protection. . One of the really valuable product! of the Government Printing Office at Washington is the annual report which Oeorge F. Kuuz renders oa the yiald of precious stones in the United States, deolarea the New York S:iu. Mr, Kunz's expert knowledge iu this spoo ialty has been for years at the service of the United States Geological Stir. . vey, and thus becomes part of official literature. The report for 1830, just published, contains a table of values as represented by the various gems discovered iu tliQ United Statos dttr ing the year. It is interesting to ob serve how the values are apportioned Here are a few items: TurquoUto 110,000 Sapphire 10.0.10 fsh quartz 10,0)0 Tourmaline 3 Oiifl Garnet 2,i0(t Iluby 1,03 J Amethyst Mi Topaz 200 Opul 20 Emerald Nou Diamond Soaa The list includes many precious minerals which would not strictly be classed as i..iiu.l tha tjLiii v.iluo assigned isS uuie under $11111,00). The prominence of the turquoise iu the American list ia recent, tho yield ba 'liS large il Arizona aud New Mexioj. THE LAST I would not die In springtime, When nature first awakes When men Rot out their wheelbarrows, And spades, and hoes, and rakes, And twist their backs, and plnnt their seeds, And wait to hear thorn sprout. Whlloyet they stone their neighbors' hens That come to scratch them out. I would not die in summer, When everything Is ripe. And fallen man Is writhing In raw cucumber's gripe; When baseball cranks nro talking, And nil the Inndscape o'er Is sprinkled thick with flowers And "garden soss" galore. A Romance HE habitues of a small French re staurant on the West Side were receutly tho guests at a humble wed- (T4j dine recep- lion, whtoh wa? the upshot of one of the most pathetio chance meetings that ever were brought about by the surging ocean of cosmopolitan life in this greatest of cosmopolitan cities. I be customers of the restaurant con stitute one of the thousands of little worlds of which the American metro polis is made up, and for two or three months a Hussiau artist and a Polish piano teacher formed a separate micro cosm iu that world. The other frequenters of the place are French men, French Canadians, Swiss and Belgians, but Aleksey Alekseevitch Smirnoff and Panna (Polish for Mrs.) Roushetzka are natives of Russia. It not until they bad taken their supper at the same table every even ing for several weeks that each of them became aware of the othor s knowledge of Russian, and the faot thrilled them both like the sudden discovery of a close blood relationship. But there was a far more interesting and, as it has since proved, a far more important revelation in store for them. Panna Koushetzka was a woman of thirty-five, a well- preserved brunette, slender and stately, and with features somewhat irregular, but full of typical Polisli grace. one bad been educated partly in Russia and partly in Paris. She had come to New York, after losing her husband, with a small so prano voice and with great musical as pirations. The voice had deserted her before her ambitions were on the road to realization, and, heartbroken and penniless, she was driven to take up piano lessons as a means of liveli hood. Smirnoff was a bachelor, some twen ty-three years her senior, thongh he looked fully ten years younger than his age. Tall and wide awake, with a brisk . military carriage, a military steel-gray mustache anil blond hair, nnstreaked with silver save at the temples, he appeared in the prime of health and activity, while his never- failing good humor aud hearty, sonor ous, genuinely Muscovite laughter made one feel in the presence of a young man of twenty-five. That bad been his actual age when he left his native country, aud after some three deoades of peregrination in Western Europe he had at lust settled down in New York. He is a jack of all trades and master of quite a few, aud al though free-hand drawing is one of his strongest points he is clever enough with his pencil to meet the require ments of a small electro-engraving es tablishment, where he has steady em ployment at a modest salary. The language of the restaurau French, spoken with a dozen different aocents. One day, however, when the soup was exceptionally satisfactory, and Smirnoff, who is something of an epicure, waB going off in ecstasies over it, a word of his native tongue es caped his lips. "Slavny (capital) soup!" he murmured to himself, as he was bringing the second spoonful un der his mustache. The piano teacher started. What is that yon said just now 'slavny soup?' she inquired, with a flush of agreeable surprise. This was the way they came to speak Russian to each other, aud from that evening ou it was the language of their conversations at the restaurant table. Although there are mauy thousands of Russian-speaking immigrants in New York, the artist and the music teacher felt iu the French restaurant like the only two Russians thrown together in a foreign country, and the little place which had hitherto drawn them to the quality of its suppers aud its gonial company now acquired a new charm for them. They delighted to converse in Rus sian, and the privacy which it lent to their chats, iu the midst of people who could not understand a word of what they were saying to each other, be came the boud of a more intimate ac quaintance between the two. They were reticent on the subject of their antecedents, but both were well read and traveled, and there was no lack of topics iu things bearing upon Russia, Paris, current American life, the stage art, literature and the like. The gal lant old Russiau was full of the most interesting information aud anecdotes anu, tneir friendship growing apace, he gradually came to introduce into his talks bits of autobiography, though they were all of the most niodeBt nature, aud he seemed to steer clear of a certain event which formed i memorable epoch in the story of hi life. Panna Roushetzka neither asked Liiu questions nor caw fit to initiate 1$ him into some of the more intimate de SUMMONS. I would not die in autumn, When footbnll has the call, And long-hnlred youths are training Home other youths to maul; When politics Is booming Thanksgiving close at hand, And cider mills are running Throughout the happy land. I would not die in winter. E'en though it be so drear. Fur then, you see, there's Christmas, With all its goodly cheer. No, I'd not die In winter, Nor Rummer, spring, uor fall And come to think it over, I would not die at all. Boston Tost, of New York. tails of her own life, though by this time it was becoming clearer to her every day that her Russian friend was in love with her and about to approach her with a proposal whioh she was by no means inclined to accept. And yet, like many another woman under similar circumstances, she was flat tered by his passion, and. being drawn to him by the magnetism of sincere friendship, she bad not the heart to cut their agreeable acquaint ance short. He procured some lessons for her, escorting her home after supper and took her to theatres and publio lec tures. All of which attention she would aocept with secret self-condetn nation, each time vowing in her heart that on the following evening she would change her restaurant. Never theless, and perhaps unbeknown to herself, she even grew exacting, and on one occasion, when she had ex pressed a desire to see Duse in Mag- da, aud he remarked thereupon, with a profusion of impulsive apologies, that he was kept from the pleasure of tak ing her to the performance by a previ ous engagement, her face fell, and for five miuutes she did not answer his questions and witticisms except in rigid monosyllables. This augnred well for him, ho thought. He did not yield, but at the next walk they took together he "popped the question" in a rather original way. They stood in front of the house in which she had her room. He had bid her eood-niuht and was about to doff his hat with that dashing sweep of his which makes him ten years younger, when he checked himself, and said, as though ill jest: Is it not foolish, Panna lioush etzka?" What is foolish?" she queried without a shadow of presentiment as to what was coming. "Why, the way we go ou living separately, each without what could justly be called a home. I am madly in love with you, l'anna Koushetzka, and I feel like devoting my life to your happiness." She stood eyetug the door of bouse across the street and made no response. "Panna Koushetzka! he implored ber tremulously. I 11 give you my answer to-mor row, she whispered. Mine. Koushetzka has not come yet, has she? Any letters for me?" Smirnoff asked the next evening, as he entered the little restaurant with his usual blitheness. Like some others of the customers he received his mail at the restaurateur's address. The Frenchman Lauded him a letter. When he opened it he read, in Rus sian, the following: 'Much respected Aleksey Alekse evitch I am the unhappiest woman in the world to-day. I confess I was not blind to the nature of your feel ings toward me, but was too much of oman and au egoist to forego the pleasure of your very flattering kind ness to me. Forgive me, I pray you, dear Aleksey Alekseevitch; but my answer must be of a negative charac ter. I have been crying like a baby since last night for having led you into a false position. Do forgive me. Your sincere friend, "Maria Roobhetzka." Do you forgive me? I beg you again and again." Smirnoff had had too many suc cesses and failures in life to let this defeat hurt his pride deeply. But he was overcome with a poignant sense of loneliness, coupled with a cruel consciousness of his old age. At the same time he sincerely regretted' the pain he had caused tho widow, and out of sympathy for her as well as for the opportunity of seeing her, he secured another interview with her, which took place iu one of the remote nooks of Tompkins Square. "I wish to reassure you, Panna Roushetzka," he said, gravely, "and to restore peace to your mind. I love you, and your letter leaves me more wretched and desolate than I ever felt before, but believe me your happiness is dearer to me than my own, and since you find that it would be disturbed by your marrying me I am resigned to my fate." The pauna was overjoyed and thanked him heartily for this friend ship, and yet his ready surrender, the ease with which he was getting recon ciled to her refusal nettled her. However, he did not seem as light hearted as he was affecting to be, and the perception of it was a source of mixed exultation and commiseration to her. He was uncommonly effusive aud sentimental, and as if by way of bidding her melancholy farewell he launched out, describing his past, she listening to his disconsolate accents with heart-wringing iuterest. "I know it is foolish for me to ob trude my personal remiuiscenoes upon you. Why should you be bored with I the humdrum details of the life of a man who is a perfect stranger to yon. Yet I cannot help speaking of it at this minute. I feel sheepish, like a schoolboy, but it somehow relieves my overburdened heart. You will excuse e." She was burning to offer some word of encouragement, to assure him of her profound respect and friendship, and of her interest in everything he had to say, but her tongue seemed grown fast to her palate and she could not utter a syllable. "It was many years ago that I was torn from my dear native soil and from a splendid career," he prooeeded, egged on by the very taciturnity of his interlocutor. "I was a young fel low and an officer is the army then, with a most promising future before me. It was during the Polish insur rection of the early sixties. My regi- ment was stationed at the Government city of N." The panua gave a start, and a volley of questions trembled on the tip of her tongne, but she somehow could not bring herself to interrupt him. I had been recently graduated from the military school, and that was my first commission, he wenton. I had many friends in the regiment, and among them a young Polish offi cer named Staukevitch." Panna Roushetzka remained petri fied. After a while she made out to inquire: "Staukevitch, did you say?" "Why. hove vnu -heard of him or some of his family?" Smirnoff asked, eagerly. "No, I am simply interested in what you aro relating. Proceed please." "Well, he was the most delightful fellow in the whole lot of us, but he did not know bow to take care of him self, and paid his life for it, poor boy. His heart was with the insurgents, and I know it and begged him to be guarded, but he was too much of a patriot to allow the instinct of self- preservation to get the better of bis revolutionaay sympathies. One day when tho Cospacks had looted the house of a Polish nobleman and taken the owner and his family prisoners, my friend gave loud utterances to his overbrimming feelings in the Officer's Club, curshiR the Government and vowing vengeance. "You must have heard how strict things were in those days. The oity of N was in a state of siege, mar tial law prevailed, and the most peace ful citizens were afraid of their own shadows. Well, poor dear Staukevitch was court-martialled and senteuced to bo Bhot within twenty-four hours by a line of soldiers from the very company of which be bad been m command And who was to take charge of the shooting and utter the fatal word to the soldiers but I, bis best friend, who was ready to die for him. Smirnoff said it with a grim sort of composure, and then broke off abruptly and fell into a muse. "Well?" the widow demanded, iu strange voice, which he mistook for mere mark of interest iu a thrilling story. "Well," he resumed, "I did not, of course, utter the terrible word, but at the very moment I was to do so I fell on the ground in a feigned swoon. My place was instantly taken by another officer and I was since theu branded as a coward, and had no choice but to resign my commission and to become the rolling stone tbat I have been ever since." He went on narrating some of bis subsequent experiences in foreign countries, but the widow did not hear him. All at once she interrupted him. Don't tell mo about that, pray Better tell me more about that friend of yours Staukevitch," and, succumb lng to an overflow of emotions, sue burst out, sobbingly: "I know you I have your photograph, Staukevitch was my father!" "Ma-ma-marusia! Is that you?' the old man shrieked, jumping to his feet and seizing her by both hands, "Dear little Marusia! Why, when you were a morsel of a thing I used to play with you. "I know," she rejoined, "and now that you say it I can recognize your face by the faded old portrait I have in my album. You were photographed together with mv unnapiiv papa. Mamma left me the picture. I did not remember your name, but I heard the, story from mother when I was child, aud siuce theu I have held the portrait dear for your sake as well as papa's. Of course it never occurred to me that it was you, but now the identity of it is as clear as day to me. She iuvited him to ber lodgings, where she introduced him to her land lady as the best friend of her dead father. They had a long aud hearty talk over the portrait and about the persons aud tilings it brought to the old man's mind. Aud on the follow ing evening, when he came to the Frenoh restaurant for his supper, he found there a letter which read as fot lows: "Dear Aleksey Alexseevitoh It was not yourself, but an utter stranger, that I refused the other day. I have loved you my whole life without know ing you. The handsome officer who ruined himself for my poor father has always been my ideal of a husband, and, will you believe it, 1 never gave up a vague sort of hope that he would be mine, lour loving "Maki'hia. New York Post, A ICeiuiti'kable Menu. After partukiug of ginger beer, ap pies, nuts, chocolate, three bottle of ginger ale, and some sherbet aud water at a picnic, aud theu putting away his regular tea at home, a nine-year-old London boy complained of a pain in his inside. The Coroner next day called it gustro-euteritis. It has been reported that Moham medans will build a mosque in bt. Louis. THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE. STORIES THAT ARE TOLD BY THE FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. A Fallow Field A Hrlef Sle.ta Stork Hi. rliange Definition The rrortunt Meg ger A Thrilling- Moment A Bronclshle Ula.ee Insult to Injury, Etc. Fte. "Let me collect my thoughts," said he, Then came a little lull; "Alas, I am afraid," said she, "l'ou find collections dull." Cleveland Plain Dealer, . block Exchange lleflnMlnn. "What do yon understand that 'put ting np margins' mean?" "Losing by degrees." Chicago rost. A Ft-lef NiestA. First Wanderer "Been settin' here long?" Second Wanderer "Naw, not very; couple o' days er bo." Truth. Insult to Injury. He "Yes, I loved a girl once, and she made a fool of me." She "Some girls do make a lasting impression, don't they?" Judge, The Trudent lteggnr. "What? you ask me for bread, and you are drunk!" "And surely you" would not ask a poor man to beg all day on an empty stomach? A Thrilling Moment. First Tom Cat "How did yon feel when the brick struck yon?" Second Tom Cat "Sny! My past eight lives rose up before me in a seo ond!" Puck. A llroatfsifle. Mabel "Yon should see the French Conut who is dancing attendance upon me." Susie "Ah, a French dancing mas ter, dear?" Philadelphia North Amer ican. Iteassuring. Poetess "That poem I sent you, Mr. Editor, contains the deepest secrets of my soul." Editor "I know it, madam; and nobody shall ever find them out through mo!" Itlasee. "Now I'm going to read you a pret ty story, dear all about tho Garden of Eden." "Oh, mummy, pi jose, not that one. I'm so tirod of that story of the Ad amses!" Punch. Hhe loe Not Exist. Little Clarence "Pa, do yon sup pose a bashful woman suffers as much as a bashful man?" Mr. Callipers "That is not a fair questipn, my son; there are no bash ful women." Puck. Not That Sort or Hooks. "Do yon find sermons in stones aud book's iu the running brooks?" asked the romantio maiden. "I never find pocketbooks in them," replied the matter-of-fact young man, Detroit Free Press. One Tiling Wanting. Artist (to Mr. Henpeck) "Now, don't you think this is a speaking like ness of your wife?" Mr. Henpeck "Well, whou my wife speaks sho always shakes her fist at me." London Fun. He Was Cruel. Mrs. Nubbous "My husband is a perfect brute." Friend "You amaze me." Mrs. Nubbons "Since the baby be gan teething, nothiug would quiet the little angel but pulling his papa's beard, aud yesterday he went and had his beard shaved off." Tit-Bits. A Puzzle. Willie Addlepate "There is one thiug I cawn't understand, douchor no!" Cbollie Noddlekins "What's that?" Willie Addlepate "Why, when we stop to oonsideh aw how uncom fortable it is iu a crowd why, aw I cawn't see why it is that there are al ways more people iu a crowd than there are where there are no crowd." -Puck. (letting lteady. Mr. Wiggles "I ordered two din ner sets sent home to-duy, Maria." Mrs. Wiggles "Two dinner sets! Why, Joshua Wiggles, are you cruz i What iu the world do you want of t it o more dinuer sets?" Mr. Wiggles "Why, didn't you toll me you were going away next week to be gone a month? I want to have dishes enough iu the house so that I won't have to wash any while you are away." Somerville Journal. CircaMt Depth of the Ocean. The deepest verified souudings are those made in the Atlantic Oceau, ninety miles off the Isluud of St. Thomas, in the West Indies, 518 75 fathoms, or 23,250 feet. Deeper water has been reported south of the Grand Bank of Newfoundland, over 27,000 feet in depth, but additional soundings iu that locality did not cor roborate this. Some years ago it was claimed that very deep soundings, from 45,000 to 4S.0OO feet, bad been found off the coast oil' South America, but this report was altogether dis credited ou additional investigation iu these localities. The ship ('hultciiger, which iu 1H72-74 made a voyuge round the globe for the express pur pose of takiug deep-sea soundings iu ull tho oceans, found the greatest depth touched iu the Pacific Oceuti less than 3000 futhoniH, und the lowest in the Atlantic, 3875 fathoms, as given above. filasa Iu Aucleiit Egypt. The oldest specimen of pure glass beuring a date is the head of a lion iu collection at the British Museum It bears the name of an Egyptian king of the eleventh dynasty. SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL. A drawing of the bison has been discovered in the rocks of tho La Mouthe cave in Dordogue, France. In a recent work on the birds of Colorado, W. W. Cooke brings up the number of species and sub-species found iu that State to 363. At the grape-cure establishments in Switzerlnud, France, aud Austria, patients are usunlly turned loose in the vineyards and allowed to gorge them selves at pleasure. With tho exception of birds, men's legs are longer iu proportion to theii body than those of any other auimal. The human foot is broader and stronget thau the foot of any other animal, so that man alone cau stand upon one foot. The relation of dust aud typhoid fever has been investigated by Drs, Kelsch and Simonin, of Paris. They have reported to the Paris Academy of Medicine that in tho summer of 1890 there, were eighteen cases of typhoid fever iu a small barracks. Tho tint of birds' eggs, especially the light colors, are apt to fade, on exposure in museums to too great sunlight. This is tho caso with the greenish bluo eggs, as those of the raurro. By experiment the darker colored eggs of olive brown or choco late hue have been fonud to nudergo little change. An inventor has hit upon a method of putting stone soles on boots ond shoes. Ho mixes a waterproof glue with a suitable quantity of clean quartz sand, aud spreads it over the leather solo used as foundation. These quartz soles are said to be very flexible and practically indestructible, and to give the foot a warm hold even on the most slippery surface. There are fully 12,000 hides tanned weekly in Newark, N. J. About half of these become shoe lipping aud vamp leather, the remainder carriage, dash, furniture and fancy leather. More horse bides are tunned thau iu any other plaoe in this country. Cor dovan vamps are tho product. Chrome tanned sole for bicycle shoes is made and the manufacture of kangaroo aud kangaroo kid is an important interest. All kinds of bag and book leather are produced. Tho great vitality of dragon-flies is shown by McLachland, who having struck at a large iKsehna at rest on a twig, the head was seen to tumble down, while the rest of the insect flew away iu an "undecided manner" for a considerable distance. Upon picking up the head he noticed that the insect bad been eating a fly at the time. "The mandibles continued working as if nothing had happened, and the masticated portious of the fly passed out at the back of the head." Mustnrd n an Aullseptlv, Dr. Roswell Park writes to the Buffalo Medical Journal commending mustard as an antiseptic. He says: "One never goes into a house, or at least a looality, iu which mustard can not easily be procured, and my cus tom is thoroughly to rub aud scrub my hands with a mixture of green or other soap, cornmeal and mustard flour, for about five minutes. After rubbing thoroughly into all the cre vices and creases of the bauds and nails by aid of a nail brush, one may be absolutely certain that his hands are sterilized, no matter what he may have been doing previously. I have no hesitation in proceeding from an autopsy to tho operatiDg room if I may thus protect my hands. Used as in dicated, the mustard leaves no un pleasaut sensation; and oue may feel that by the time it produces uupleas ut tingling or rubefactiou of the skin its essential oil has done its desired work as an antiseptic. I have dis carded all other means of preparing the hands, and iu several years ase of mustard iu this way havo never beeu disappointed or had the slight sat reason to question its effective ness. I might udd also that it is an Admirable deodorizing agent, aud will take awny from the bands all offensive odor of dead or dying tissues and all redolence of iodoform." World's Largest Orchard. The largest fruit plantations in the world are iu Jatnuicu. They are owned and operated by an American com pauy, the area of whose fruit farm is 44,000 acres. They own 2r!,000 acres, and the other 1(3,000 acres are held by them under lease. Their principal crops are bauatias aud cocoantits, aud last year they shipped 3,000,000 bunches of bananas aud 5,000,000 socoanuts, besides other fruits to America aud elsewhere, employing twelve steamers belonging to the com pany. Near Olden, ou the Ozark mountains, in southern Missouri, there is ono of the largest aud finest fruit farms iu the world. It consist of 2200 acres of laud, owned by a syndi cate formed of the members of the Missouri Horticultural Society, and ou which are planted til,0im peach, 23,000 apple and 21100 peur trees, with forty acres in small fruits. There is au orchard at Uttrhura, in C iuifor belonging to El wood Cooper, wht has an area of 1700 acres, and en tains 10,000 olive trees, 3000 English walnut trees, 4500 Japanese persiui inon trees, 10,000 almond trees aud about 4000 other nut and various fruit trees. Buffalo Times. (las Kri;ht as the un. Consul DuesteratCrefoid, Germany, reports to the State Department a dis covery made there which, is said, will revolutionize the methods of illumina tion. It is au incandescent gus. A single jet of ordiuury size cau emit a light of much more than 1000 caudle power, und tine print cau be reud at a distance of 100 feet. Tho inventor kiiys the cost for a light of 1500 candle power is only 4 J cents per hour, while that of au ordinary electric light ot i'l'J caudle-power i fourteen cents per hour. THE tauiET HOUSE. Oh, mothers, Worn and weary With cares tbat never cease, With never time for pleasure, With days that have no peace. With little hands to hinder, And feeble steps to guard, With tasks that lie unfinished, Ieem not yonr lot too bard. I know a bouse where plnythlngs Are hidden out of sight; Vo sound of childish footsteps Is heard from morn till night! No tiny hands to Utter, That pnll things all awry; No bnhy hurts to pity As the quiet days go by. And she, the sad-eyed mother What would she give to-day To feci yonr cares ond burdens, To walk your weary way? Ah! happy sho, yea blessed. Could she again but sen The rooms all strewn with playthings And the children round her kneel HUMOR OF THE DAY. Awkward Miss (withau umbrella) "Bog pardon!" Polite Gentleman "Dou't mention it; I have another eye left." New York Weekly. "Why do women always grab np every little baby thry see and kiss it?" "Because little babies, yon know, are helpless. " Cleveland Leader. Yobsley "Think yon'll get a chain less wheel?" Mndge "If I do, 1 will be at the cost of wearing a watch less chain." Indianapolis Journal. "Wcylor seems to retain his mili tary tastes." "What do you mean?" "This paper says that hp desires noth ing more than a quiet retreat." Puck. Jenkins "I wonder how it happens that Miss Kidd is always out when I call?" Jones "Oh! just ber Inck, I guess," Browning, King & Co.'s Monthly. "Ma, is there any pie left in the pautry?" "There is ono pieco, but you can't have it." "You are mis taken, ma, I've hud it," Clovcland Plain Dealer. "Miss Tucker wouldn't have me, but sho evidently appreciated iny pro posal." "Why do you tuiuk so?" "She told fifteen different girls about it." Chicago Record, Teacher "Tommy, what do you know of the sphinx?" Tommy "The sphinx is a woman with a great head. Sho hasn't talked for three thousand years." Chicago Tribune. Wickwire "Really, now, you don't believe the poor nre growing poorer?" Mudge "I know they are. Look at me. I havcu't half the money I had on poy day." Indianapolis Journal. "They say Dnmloy's wife rules him with a rod of iron.' "Oh, no; that's an exaggeration. Why, she cau make him jump by merely crooking her lit tle finger at him." Household Words. "I hear that the crowd booted you when yon appeared at the Pedliugtou Theatre Royal." "False, mo boy, false," repliod the eminent tragedian. "All false. There was no crowd." Household Words. "Gentlemen of the jury," said the lawyer, impressively; "our defense is insanity. I i-hall now show that my client once served on a jury and list ened to expert testimony for four months." Puck. Emperor William "What is the latest from HaytiV" Tho Imperial Aid "The Haytiauii have submitted, sire." Emperor William "Nothet victory for me and Providence." In dianapolis Journal. "Now," Buid Mr. Gragau, as he read the headlines, "how could there ho a double murder? Oh, I see," hj continued, after reading a little. "Sure I fought tha man was kilt twice." Indianapolis Journal. Mrs. Skinner (talking about tho took market) "I toll you what, Mr. Starboarder, there's nothiug H like leather." Mr. Starboarder (vainly sawing) "Oh, yes, there ia this steak, for instance." Tit-Bits. "Honest?" heexcluimod. "HouestJ Weil, rather. He not only wouldn't steal from au individual, but he actu ally refused to steal from the Govern ment once when he had the oppor tunity." -Chicago Eveuing Post. A prudent man had his portrait painted receutly. His friends com plained to him that it was much too old. "That's what I ordered," said he. "It will save tho expense of au other one ten years from now." Tit Bits. A schoolboy was asked to explain the formation of dew. His answer was: "The earth revolves on au axis every twenty-four hours, und in con sequence of the tremendous pace at whioh it travels it perspires freely." Tit-Bits. . The speaker ha 1 done with telliug of the wrongs of woman, aud had sunk back into her seat. "She makes a mountain out of a mole-hill," whis pered the persouly person in the front pew. "Yes, and such a botch, too!" rejoined the othor. Detroit Journal. "There is ono point about your friend Boswell, Johnson," said Na poleon. "He's simply doted on you." nay, rather, retorted Jouusou, that he aueo-doted on me. He re- uded me somewhat of ou iu your inie, Bonupurtc. llo was a Para site." Harper's Bazar. "An author," said the practical lit torateur, "ought to know several lan guages." "Of course he ought," re plied his fellow cruft.-imau. "Thj field bus been so well worked that t lici t! is uo longer any usj of reading old English books in search of original ideas. " Washington Star. Little three-year-old StinnyloeUs had boon told that he couldn't huve a doughnut, because it would make him tick. He sut iu high-chuir und looked lougiugly ut the plateful of sugar-coat-ed "holes with cake around them." At lust he turned, and, iu pleading tones, Biiid: "Mamma, want to del sick!" Cleveland Leader.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers