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TIGNESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 5, 1883, $1.50 PER ANNUM. fell, fori diTWiV I 1 ff'UflD if hi THE GOOD OIJJ WAY. j John Man had a wife who was kind and true I A ife who loved him well; Ehe cared for his home and Iholr only child; But, if I the tmth roust toll, , he fretted and pinod beoause John was poor ' And his business was alow to ray; But he only mid, when she talked of change, ! ' We'll sliok to the good old way." Bhe taw her neighbors were growing rio, And dwelling In houses grand; Thnt shew at living in povorty, With wealth on every hand; And she nrged her husband to speculate, To rink his earnings at play; But he only said, " My dearest wifo, We'll r ick to the good old way." For he knew that the money that's quickly got ' Is the money that's quickly lost; And the money that stays is the money earned At Loneot endeavor's coit; So he plodded along in his honest style, And he bettered himself each day; And he only raid to his fretful wife, We'll stick to the good old way." And at last there came a terrible crash, When beggary, want and shame Came down on the names of their wealthy friends, While John's remained the same; For he bad no debts and gave no trust, "My motto is this," he'd sayr " It's a ohnrm against panics of every kind 'Tis ' Stick to the good old way.' " ' And his wife looked 'round on the little house That was every nail their own, And i he asked forgivonoss of honest John For the peevish mistreat she had shown; But he only raid, as her tearful face Upon his shoulder lay, ' The good old way is the best way, wife We'll stick to the good old way." THE LIVING BARRIER. It was a pretty Bight to see old Uncle Jim, as he was called by every one who tiaveled the northern trail, sitting in front of his house in the afternoon In his great cane-bottomed chair, w ith Aunt Tolly alongideof him in hers, the two holding each other's hand in the most unaffected and simple way. Uncle Jim kept the station at Indian Well, and his house as the rail was a great thoroughfare was generally full in the evenings with freighters, pack ers, bull punchers," and those travel ing for business or pleasure. Outside the house his dominion was complete, but inside Aunt Polly was absolute, for as he said: "Polly 'n me greed to split up th bossin', an I never interferes; neither does she. It conduces to peace, don't it, ole woman V" ' It needed but a glance to see that nothing of this kind was necessary to keep peace between these two, for if ever there was a couple who lived for eacn other it was that one. Every afternoon Uncle Jim would take hi3 seat outside ' and light his pipe, soon to be joined by Aunt Polly, and there the two would Bit, hand in hand, looking out at the beautiful scenery of Bald Peak canon. If any one was tnere Uncle Jim would tell stories, while Aunt Polly listened, lighting a match for him if his pipe went out, and when called upon giving . her testimony to his statements in her soft voice and gentle way. I used to think the sight a beautiful one, and I was never tired of watching them A story which Uncle Jim wasjnever tVred of telling was that of his court ship. When he was young he had lived on the border, and had there wooed and won his pretty bride, for Aunt Polly must have been very beau tiful when she was young, judging irom ner lace when i saw her. otten as he told it, Aunt Polly never failed to slightly blush and remonstrate at one point, and as invariably Uncle Jim would chuckle and then gravely ask her pardon. Hut the story itself will be more interesting than my talking about now it was told. " Lionsr back in th forties I were ez strapping a young feller ez you c'uld find on th' border, tho' I do say it my self, ez orter wait fur others to say Rich a tiling. In them duys the border line were th' western edge of Ioway, an' my ol' father, Elder liichard John son, had moved out a little beyond th' most of the settlers. In f ac' ther wer on'y one fam'ly further than ourn, and that were the Beekmans. My Polly's father wer a curious kinder chap, an' he b'lieved ef he wer' nearer than thirty mile to any one he wer bein' desperit crowded. 'N them days I used t' farm a leetle an' hunt consid er'ble, fur th hull country wer' full o' game. We didn't make no 'count at all of wild turkey nor prairie chicks, an deer wer the smallest things we thought wuth givin' any one. 'N the course o' my hunts I came 'cross the Beekman's cabin, an' had a talk with th ol man. " 'N course he 'vited me in, an' thar I met my Polly fur th' lust time. She's kinder old. bovs. now, but you orter ha' seen her then. She wer th pret tiest pal n that ar section of country, an' t' my eyes th prettiest I ever see. T me she ez pretty ez ever, ain't you, ol worn an V And Uncle Jim. gave Aunt Polly's hand a most perceptible squeeze, "Arter that ar' fust visit I used to iro thar purty Vler. I alius 'lowed fur to take su' -'unce with me ez a present t Pol' ' '".'ther, an," (' kinder keep th ol' man quirt, fur he was monstrous fond of talkln' 'bout th' degeneracy of th' boys ; an I used t' think if he looked down on us that ar way he'd kinder think I weren't fit t' hev Polly ; an fur a fac' I weren't, nor no other man ever wer'." "Now, Jim," said Aunt Polly, warn- ingly. AU right, my dear I Th' fac' air, boys, Polly never w'u'd 'gree t' that statement. I've alius thought she kinder hankered arter Pete Bartons' the sto'keeper, and sorter 'gretted she didn't take him." And Uncle Jim laughed until we all laughed, out of pure sympathy, Aunt Polly as loudly as any one. "Wa'al, said the old man, wiping his eyes, " I used to go t th' Beek mans ez much ez I cud; an I cot toned up t' Polly monstrous strong, but somehow I never c'u'd toll her how I keered fur her. I wer' kinder scared-like, an' I used to hope ez she'd sorter make the fust move. Mind you. Polly wer' lovln' meah' hull time, but she never let on, an' I hadn't the savez of a mewl inth' matter. I used f sit thar an' talk 'bout th' weather, an' th crops, an' shootin', an' then go outside an' blame myself fur a fool, cause I hadn t said nothin special t her. I used t' make up talks fur t' say ; but bless ye, when I got 'long of Polly I disremembered 'em totally. " one day l wer 'n the wood, 'long with father, an' th two of us wer' cuttin trees. Fellin' a small sanlin'. it broke sudden, an' faliin' hit me on the shoulder. I wer' consider'bly braised-like, ez you may think, an' I went to bed when I got home, an' stayed thar. It wer' my left shoulder ez wer' hurt, an' it swelled up mon strous. " The second day 111 never f orgit that time as long ez I live a man came inter our house on his way t' th' fort ol' Fort Benton. He told, arter supper, 'bout rumors ez th' Blackfeet wer on th' war-path, an' said he wer goln to warn th' people. Arter they all went to sleep I lay thar, an' I c'u'd'nt get th' story outer my head. I a'posr it wer' th pain of iny shoulder ez much ez anythin', but I didn't seem to sleep. Finally I dropped off, an I dreamed ez how th' redskins wer takin' Polly's cabin. I woke up all of a start, an in a cold sweat. That dream fixed me. " I got ip an' stole out quiet, not wakin' any one, to th' stable. Thar I saddled my critter, an' rode out into th' moonlight Ez you may think, I beaded straight fur old Beekman's place, an' ez my hoss wer' a good one, i mat spare spur ndln. .Now you D iieve that ar ride hurt ray arm. Why, boys, I declar I thought I'd faint arore i got thar. And Uncle Jim rubbed his shoulder. When he put his hand down Aunt Polly bent and kissed it. " When I reached th' house it wer' 'bout 6 o'clock 'n th morning, an1 thar 'n th'. front yard I seen Polly feedin' chickens. Ef you'll b'lieve me, when I got thar I got kinder 'shamed, an er I cud have gone back I w u d, " It seemed sorter foolish fur t' come that way, an' with a story that didn't really 'mount to much ez it stood. " S pose ther weren t no raid, what w'u d I have said, frightenin' them people into fits ? However, Polly seen ine an' hailed me, so I c'u'dn't go back men. "I rode up an got off. The fust thing I hearn wer' that th' bid man an' his wife had gone to Brownville, leav in' Polly an' the four young uns t' keep house. I had aome breakfast, an' then I sat down to smoke. " Polly found out somehow 'bout my arm, an' she took on drefful; railly, hearin' her, I didn't think it hurt half so much. She 'stated on my sittin' still an' lettin Tom Beekman, her brother a slip 'bout ten feed my hoss, which Tom, who had a kind of admiration fur me, wer' willin' enough to do. "I didn't let on 'bout th' Blackfeet, but I sorter warned Tom to keep nigh the' house, an' I kept him by tellin' stories. Ez the day wore on, I got mo' an mo' narvous, tm pout 4 o clock: I up an' tolled Polly the hull story. She got kinder white 'bout th' cheeks didn't ye, ol' lady ? an her eyes got big like. "But she didn t flinch, not a mite. I reckon 1 loved her better then nor I did before. She asked what to do, an' I told her honest ther wer' nothin do 'cent wait, an' mebbe the reds wu'dn't come, an mebbe her dad 'ud tret back. me nouse wer a jog-canin, iust rate fur fightin' in. 'cause old Beekman wer too old a borderman not to make his house a reg'ler fort That night Polly an the young uns went to bed. an' I sat ud. "Now. mind ye, I hadn't said a word to Polly yet. but things wer gettin' kinder easier, ez it wer' went to sleep 'bout three, leavin' Tom out watch. I guess it wer 'most 8 o'clock when he waked me up an said : "Jim, thar's somethin' movln long th' edge of th clearin' 1' " I got up an looked out, an , sure enuff, I seen a head, with a feather on It. just over a bush. In course knowed th' Injuns had come, an' ef you'll b'lieve me, my heart sorter sank djwn. I never felt skeered afore, 'cept of course with Polly, ez I know on ; but I wer right down frightened " It's a monstrous mean feeling, that sameskeer. Let alone Polly, I had them young uns on my hands to take keer of, an me with only one arm, fur my left shoulder wer' swelled ez big ez a mussmelon. I wer' lookln at them redskins, fur they'd come out' th bushes by this time, an wonderin' what I'd do; an', boys, I never felt so mean in my life, when I felt a little hand on my should er th' well one. I turned round, an' thar wer' Polly standin. "'Jim,' says she, I ain't a bit skeered with yon.' I looked 'a her eyes for a moment, an' I got ez bold ez brass. I bent down, puttin' my arm round her, an' kissed her, an' ef you'll b'lieve me Polly kissed me back." "Now, Jim, you know that ain't true," said Aunt Polly, with a con scious smile, her cheek slightly redden ing ns she spoke. I begs your parding, my dear," said Uncle Jim, with an elaborate wink at the rest of us, intended to assure us that he firmly held to his theory; "I outer have membered you don t give in t' that ar. However, at any rate you didn't object, did ye?" " .No, dear,' said the old lady, with placid smile. " I looks at her for a moment, an' I says: " Tolly,' says I, ' I loves you, darlln. " Dog gone me ef she did't put her head down on my shoulder an' begin t' cry. I didn't know what t' do. 'Polly,' says I, Ms you skeered, darlin'?' She lifted up her head an says, soft-like, her head bent down : " I die willing, dear, to hear you say that I'm cryin' Jim, 'cause I'm so happy Now 1 wer' happy, too, happy as a b'ar n a honey tree, but I didn't feel like cryin. Not much, boys. I felt, sore arm an' all, ez tho I cud lick all the redskins this Bide of the Rockies. I never did feel so good ez I did then. l kissed Polly agin, an then I prepared for work. By this time them Injuns had made up their minds ez to what they'd do, an a few on 'em come up t' th' house to break in, They know'd th' old man wer' away, it Beems. I'm glad t' say ez how three on 'em didn't go back, for Tom settled one an' I fetched two, restin' the rifle on th' log, an' Polly loadin' fur me. Th' rest, they got out. I s'pose it wer' too hot fur 'em. Th' next thing wer a night or arrers agin' th logs, but bless ye, we didn't care for them. 'men ther wer a lull Kinder for a time, an' at last I seen some fire arrers fly out. They d taken tufts of grass, wound 'em round the arrers, an' shot em off blazing. At first they fe',1 short, an wharever I c'u'd see a red skin I'd fire, gener'ly hurtin the chap aimed at. But arter a while they moseyed 'round th clearin' to th' side nearest th' house, an here they'd fire them arrers from be hind trees, so I didn t see em Bimebye one of 'em lit, an fust thing I knowed, th' roof were on fire. Now, 1 were conslder'ble bothered bout this, fur I had no water to put th' fire out, an' ef I had, I c'u'dn't work much with one arm. I were study in' on it, an' them "reds were yellin' outside, when all of a sudden my eye fell on a long pole in one corner. " That 'ar roof were made of shakes slabbed-out boards, you know an' they was pinned to th' beams. I picks up th pole, an puttin it agin th burnin shake, th' hull lot of us heaved. Bimebye th' shake give an' slid off. Wall, I were delighted 1 I kissel Polly an' th' two gals, an' shook hands with Tom. I calcilated that we'd shove off a shake soon ez it got on fire, an' I knowed' th' logs w'u'dn't burn. told Polly to get a mattrass, an get under it so ez to be safe ef any arrers fell through th' hole, but she put th' young uns thar, an' stayed out herself. Said she wer'en't goin' to let me be in danger, a' she outer it. 'Pears to me now ez this were kinder roolish, but then I thought it were just like Polly, an' in course what Poll' did were right." " I d do the same now, Jim, said the old lady. I b lieve you w u d, I b lieve you w'u'd I Waal, boys, time slipped on, an' every chance Tom or I got we'd fire, an' somebody'd get hurt. I told Tom an' Polly an the gals to keep a sharp lookout, fur I were feared of a run-in by th reos. Mire enure, oout 10 o clock they come, i ust thing i knowed they were batterin' away at th' door, an' they got it down. "Wall, it peared t me ez tho I went crazy just then. I ketched hold of an ax standin' thar an' I set myself in that doorway an ef you'll b'lieve me, ther wern t no Injun ez come in. My arm ! I never thought "bout my arm at all till it wer' all over." Jim stood up ther' in frunt of us," broke in Aunt Polly, with kindling eyes, " an' it seemed to nie ez if he got bigger. He swung that ax round his head ez if it wer' a roed. Just beyond him wer the howling crowd of sav ages, leapln' at him like wolves, and yelling ez only Injuns can yell. I could see them by the firelight Between them and us stood Jim, an' they never got past him. I tell you it wer a grand sight ! It seemed to me ez tho' 1 was ez safe ez ever I was, an' I felt sure Jim w'u'dn't i;et hurt. I knowed he wu'dn t !" " Th' old 3ady alius gets a leetle off her head 'bout that fight," said Uncle Jim, with, glance fi;! ct aSscUoa u( his wife; "but it wer a grand ne that's a fac. I dunno how long it lasted; It mout have bin a minute an it mout have bin an hour fur all I c'u'd tell. At last the reds broke an' run, leavin a pile of 'm lyln at that door step. We got up th' door agin, an' arter that they let us alone fur the night Next morning, 'bout seven, a lot of men come an' tho Injuns got out I wer sick with my arm fur a long time, but Folly, she 'alsted on our bein' married so she cud nuss me, an we wer'. When I got well we gia a party, an' a high old time we had. Sence then we've had our easy times an' hard times, but take it all round and we've lived pretty well. An' th best oi it all Is that we ve never had no trouble at ween xis, has we, Polly," and Uncle Jim looked at his wife. "No, dear, never a bit," was the gentle answer from Aunt Polly. AJfrea Hatch. HEALTH HINTS, Dr. J. II. Mussen has produced good results in a number of cases of varicose veins from the use of fluid extract of hamamelis in teaspoonful doses. The cases are recorded in the Medical Timet. The Medical Keyrd says that Pro fessor Bisoz has found in seventeen cases of snake bite3 that a filtered solu tion of chloride of lime, injected into the place where the virus entered. prevented any poisonous symptom appearing. A physician says that it must not be assumed that, because there is more fresh and unbreathed air on the moun tains or at the seaside, there need be no precautions. There are special ex posures in these changes. The damp ness of morning and night is often ap parent and flannel underclothing is needed. The crowding into smaller rooms gives less air space and tempts to open windows, which, however good, must not be so situated as, througa small openings, to pour a stream of air on the body when covered with perspiration. The beds in hotels 0re not infrequently damp, and many colds have their origin from them. in some parts of England, among the poorer classes, a large glass of cold spring water, taken on going to bed, is found to be a successful remedy for colds; inffact, many medical practition ers recommend a reduced atmosphere and frequent draughts of cold fluid as the most efficacious remedy for a re cent cold, particularly when the pa tient's habit is full and plethoric. It is well known that confining inocu lated persons in warm rooms will make their smallpox more violent by augmenting the general heat and fever; and it is for the same reason that a similar practice in colds is attended with ana'agous results' a col l being in reality a slight fever. The World's (iold and Silver. The subjoined statement will ex hibit the production of the precious metals throughout the world in 1882, carefully compiled from the most au thentic sources: AMKHICA. Countries. Gold. bilver. To ml. Alaska briliau Col.... United States. Mexico. Guatemala.... Honduras Sun Salvador. . Nicaragua..... Costa Rica.... Columbia. Venezuela, .... Guiana. brazil Bolivia. CUitl fiuu.ooul 8.00(1,000 84,400,000 1 00,000 ft00,0OO AO,000 100,000 46,960,000 4,000,000 400,000 160,000 aio.ooo 116,000 10,000 (160,000 8,100,000 7,S60,0O0 4,600,000 1,000,000 860,000 600,000 876,000 60,000 1 000,000 860.000 76,000 1,800,000 8,100,000 1, 8-0,000 voo,ooo 1I,000 160,000 400,000! 800,000 10,000 150,000 MO.00O 1W6,000 176,000 R,V),000 100,000 COO.OOO 600,01111 100,000 100,000 oo,ooo , 146,000 100,000 460,0001 8,000.000 7H0.000 400,000 0,000 60,000 Argentine Hep rai&Koma. . . Ola. countriea Totals l, Uoo.tjool frli,60,000 tl83,OO,O00 I U UOPZ. Hiiaula 10,000,000 (f600,000 SJ,6llO,0oO Austria 1,600,000 W6,oo: l,76,ooO lrUg,ia 1,000,000 76,000 1,276,000 Prance 176,000 400,000 675,ooo Spain 45,(100 ,000,000 ,46,000 Oth. countriea 100,000 400,000 600,000 Totala $38,000.000 ta.80Q.ooo1 saa.mifl.non japan toooooo" 14,0110,000 4,uoo,ooo Borneo too,ooo 645,000 l,s;s6,ooo China 700,000 475,000 1,175,000 Archipelago... 00,000 8,000,000 8,800,000 Totals: s,Boon.nio an.ooo.noo m.oon.nnn Australia 144,(100,000, i64x,uuo 44,546,uo0 Kew Zealand. ,ooO,oiiOj 476,000 6,476,000 Africa ,000,000 600,000 8,600,0ii0 Oceania 1,000,000, 430,000 1.450,000 I Grand totala 1 118,000,0001 t,OO0,0OO' 821,ooo,ooo The annual product of the precious metals attained its acme in 1853, since which date the annual product of gold has decreased one-half, while that of silver has doubled. The Annamese Coort of Appeals. The law courts of Annam seem to be as numerous and complicated as those of the mostclvilized community; but, if a plaintiff fails to obtain redress in any of them, having tried them all in due order, there remains for him the fol lowing simple expedient: lie proceeds to the court of appeal, or Tain Phap a builJing lying close to the outer walls where he finds hanging to a door a gong with its stick attached. On this he strikes three heavy blows and then a number of softer ones, whereupon an attendant appears, and says, with a magisterial tone cf voice, " What do you ask for ?" " J ustice," replies the plaintiff, handing in his petition. "You shall have it," is the response, and we are assured that the Tain Pimp ii generally m good as the word of its, jepreijcnttiYa. Zcncty;, A BATHE AMONG INDIANS. THE TRAGEDY BVACTEO OK THI BKOSES OP OS1IS &A.XB. tlawthn Cheyenne and the Vtrm Rrttlrd a, Htandinsr Dispute A Bloody Mnamrre Indlaa Hnperatltlnn. Referring to the murder of two men at Grand Lake, Col., the Denver (CoL) Tribune says : Grand Lake,the scene of the recent tragedy, has a number of romantirt associations con nected with it weaved with a number of Indian legends, all of them more or less tragic in their character, and all full of the superstition of the red man. To the Indian Grand Lake has a peculiar interest, for with it is con nected stories of battles and carnage, heroic bravery and a fierce fight which swept a whole band from the face of the earth. The principal tribes inhab iting this section of the country were the Utes, Arapahoes and Cheyennes, and between the former, who were the mountain Indians, and the latter tribes, who pitched their tepees on the plains, was waged a perpetual warfare. The Utes, if anything, more cruel and un scrupulous than their neighbors of the lowlands, always dwelt in mountain fastnesses, from which they would swoop down from time to time, carry ing off the ponies and other valuables of the Cheyennes and Arapahoes, pro voking each time short battles, in which they were generally victorious. In the spring of 1847 a considerable band of Utes were encamped on the banks of the lake on the exact spot where the town now stands. The snows of the past winter had left the trails sufficiently 1 are, and the stock of ponies and other luxuries was getting very low, so a considerable portion of the warriors were called together one fine morning by their chief and ha rangued on the duty they owed to their tribe to inflict punishment on their hereditary enemies, and get some po nies, after which the line of march was taken for the distant plains. After several days of marching the enemy was surprised in a grove of cotton wood on the banks of the Platte, a few miles below where Denver now stands, which was the favorite camping and hunting ground of all the plain In dians. Stealing stealthily upon their foe the attack was made in the gray of the early dawn. Although aroused from their slumbers thus unexpect edly a vigorous defense was madeand the battle raged until the sun was high in the heavens, when the attacking party, being repulsed, retreated, not stopping until they had reached their mountain home on the lake. In the'.r flight however, they carried off, be side several of the coveted ponies, the fair Star of the Night," the favorite daughter of the Arapahoe chjeftain. As soon as the great loss was discov ered all of the young warriors, burn ing for revenge, clamored for the war path. But little time wa3 occupied in the funeral dance over the half dozen who had been slain in the battle, when the pursuit was began with a vow from each that no halt should te made tintil the enemies were punishf d and the maiden rescued. Silently, like an immense serpent crawling through the denies and canons, the iaint moon light casting weird shadows from the cliffs above, now wendiDg around seme rocky bluff, then stealing through some thicket or scrub-oak, the united bands trod their way. nor paused in their course, following closely in the trail of the despoilers. On the third day, just as the dawn was breaking, they came upon the camp of the enemy, who, tired with the fatigues of their long marcti snd battle, were Bleeping soundly. Like a whirlwind of destruction wa3 poured the arrows of the avengers Into the bodies of the sleepers, and many of them never awoke to consciousness. A stubborn resistance, however, was made by the Utes, and the .battle lasted the whole day through. The latter, as a measure of safety, placed all the aquaws and pappooses in the camp in the canoes belonging to the tribe, and directed them to proceed to the center of the lake to await the issue of the fight As the day wore on, however, the sky be came overcast, a furious storm arose, and one by one the Iran barks were wrecked until out of the whole number of frightened women aad children not a soul remained. The Utei received a terrible punishment, for out of the six score of warriors composing the band but few escaped to tell the tale to the other bands of the distant West. The victors, flushed with their victory, re turned to their beloved plains and were never afterward troub ed by these dreaded enemies. Since the day of the battle the place has ever been regarded by the Indians as haunted by the spirits of those who perished there, the soughing of the wind as it moans through the tall pines around the lake being, in the super-sti-t ous minds of thess sons of the fort st, tho cries of and shrieks of tho women nnd children drowned on that fateful day. llecent events would seem tJ lend some color to the Indian theory that an uncanny spr " .overs over the place, and Grand Lake, with all its nat ural beauties of mountain and lake, will ever carry with its mention the memory of fiendish deeds and scenes of carnage, which will repel for a long time any idea of a rapid settlement of the country. Statistics show that the growth f timber in KanBas is yearly increasing beyond tue consumption t LIFE'S TRUE SIGNIFICANCE. Deeper than all sense of seeing Lie the secret sonrce of being, And the soul with troth ajrreeinfr Learns to lire in thoughts and deeds, For the life is more than raiment, And the earth is pledged for payment Unto man for all his needs. Nature is oar common mother. Every living man our brother, Therefore let ns serve each other; Not to meet the law's behests, Bat beoanse through cheerful giving We shall learn the art of living; And to live and serve is best. Life is more than what man fancies; Not a game of idle chtnoes; Bat it steadily advances Up the ragged heights of time, Till each complex web of trouble, Every sad hope's broken babble Hath a meaning most sublime. ' More of religion, less profession; More of firmness, less concession; More of freedom, lees oppression, In the church and in the state; More of life and less of fashion; Mon of love and less of passion; That will make ns good and great When true hearts, divinely gifted, From tho chaff of error sifted, On their crosses are uplifted, Shall the world most clearly see That earth's greatest time of trial ' Calls for holy self denial, Calls on men to do and be. But forever and forever Let it be the soul's endeavor Love from hatred to dissever. And in whate'er we do, Won by love's eternal beauty, To our highest sense of duty Evermore be firm and tree. HUMOR OF THE DAT. The prince of Wails A baby. Passed balls Last winter's festivi ties. Lowell Courier. Everv machinist has at least one vice. New York New. Even the quietest woman can make a bustle when she takes a notion to. The Judge. Can't get drunk on water? Non sense I Go on a yachting trip and see if you can't. Boston Transcript. ' "Please give me something, sir, says an old woman. " I had a blind child; he wa3 my only means of subsistence, and the poor boy . has r severed his sight 1" Papa," said a lad the other night, after attentively studying for some minutes an engraving of a human skeleton, "how did this man manage to keep in his dinner?" The " assisted " emigrant is one that is sent to this country as a pauper, with passage paid. The "assisted" tramp is one that is urged out of your yard with a boot. Picayune. A London oculist says that culture diminishes the size of the eyes. Now just listen to that ! Everybody knows that small i's are a sign of the entire absence of culture. Boston Tran script. . Mr. Alexis Campbell was -locked up by the St. Louis police because, after nine sherry cobblers, he couldn't walk; or stand straight. It was the last straw, you see, that broke the Camp bell's back. Life. An amateur scientist has discovered that the mercury climbs up high ia warm weather in order to keep cook Paste this on your thermometer when the next hot wave comes sizzling along. New York Commercial. " There is one thing connected with your table," said a drummer to a West ern landlord, " that is not surpassed even by the best hotels in Chicago." "Yes," replied the pleased landlord, "and what is that?" " The salt" Rochester Erpins. Papa " What ! Jimmy, you Bmoke? and what do you smoke, pray?" Jim my" 1 smoke cubebs." Papa "And why do you smoke them?" Jimmy " Oil 1 they are good for a bad cold." Papa" How often do you have a bad cold?" Jimmy " Oh, whenever you give me ten cents." New York Life, "Mamma, what's a . book-worm?" "One who loves to read and study and rnllfict bookn. my dear." The next night company called. Miss Edith, who wears rings innumerable, was present. " Oh, mamma, look at Miss Edith's ring. 1 guess she is a ring worm, ain't she?" tSprinyfleld (0.) News. "She thirsted for one fond look she starved for a kiss denied," says Ella Wheeler in one of her poems. Pour thing! In these days, when " fond looks" are Hying all about from every btreet corner, and "kisses" are not denied when anybody knows where they are wanted, is too bad. We have heard of "starving to death in the midst of plenty." This po:ir creature seems to be trying It on. Hartford Post. A friend, visiting in a minister's family where the parents were very strict tn regard bthe children's Sab bath deportment, was contidi'nt ally Informed by one of the little glristl.at she would like to be a in .ulster. " Why?" inquire! the visitor, rather puzzled to understand what had given the child so sudden an adniirution for that lulling. She quickly cnl ghtened him by the prompt reply: !' So I could holler ca Sunday." " ' ' 4
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers