STIjc me, Nod Bloomficlit, )a. A WOMAN'S CURIOSITY. 6 "TACK, I say t Jack 1" . , J " Well, what now ?" And John 8t. John, the rising young artist, a the newspaper pufla denominated him, gave the church spire on his canvas an extra touch before ho looked round. "Spirit of ParrhaiiiuK,". ho exclaimed theatiicnlly, u.t his eyes fell on Poroival ' Kent, the sculptor, whose studio wns op posite his own, " what perturbs thy lofty brain, friend of boyhood's days?" "Oil, do Ktop chuffing," cried Kont, " and listen to what I've got to say. The girls are here !" "What girls?" " My cousins, from Washington county came in on the night train ; and and they expect mo to givo 'era some breakfast want to try my bachelor housekeeping they say," with a grimace, " and there's noth ing in the cupboard but an empty sherry bottle and a plate of orange pool." ' "Rather an unsatisfactory banquet," observed St. John. "But what can I do?" "Stand by a felbw," implored Kent pitcously, " and I'll do the same by you when you'ro in a tight place." "Of course I will ; but how ?" " Help me got something to eat." " Can't you order it from the restau rant?" Kent screwed up his face, and shook his head dolefully. "No cash," said he. " And I won't ask for credit." " I wish I had something to lend you," said St. John,diving down into the vacaum of his pockets, " but that last gas bill cleaned me out completely. "Yes, I'll help you ; what is it to be ?" "I'll tell you," quoth Kent, mysteriously approaching his lips to St. John's ear. " Cook some chocolate ; I've got a cake of Baker's best vanilla flavored." "How?" " Scrape it into hot water, and let it boil like the deuce I I have got a jolly good Are in the charcoal pot, back of the big red curtains where the clay models are." '' But you can't dine of of chocolate." " Wisely said, Johannes. Look hero." lie lifted tho skirt of hi threadbare vel vet painting jacket, and disclosed a vet eran fowl, rather ragged about the head and neck, but brave in tail feathers. "By the beard of the Prophet, a rooster I" said St. John. "It belongs to old Smoyle, the animal painter," whispered Kent. "Got it for a model last week out of town left it for me to feed. Boil it." "Too tough," suggested St. John. " Not a bit, with a good hot (ire. Chick on. chocolate, French ' bread there's a breakfast for a king." " 1 know now to make omolotts, it wo could beg, borrow or steal half a dozen eggs," said St. John hopefully. - " Jones has a nestful up stairs that he's painting into a barn-yard interior," said Kent. : " But he's had 'era three weeks, and eggs don't improve by keeping." . "Very well, so I'm to be cook. But how am I to get the charcoal fire, after I've wrung the roosters neck and hauled out his feathers. " You are to come and cough at the door Then I'll say, in an off hand sort of manner, you know, " by the way, I havn't shown the fine view of my window." Of course they'll moke a rush for the window, airtl then you're to clip through like mischief. Once behind the red curtain, you'ro all right." " But how am I to get out again ?" " I'll contrive a way only for pity's sake make baste !" , " All right ; you clear out, and I'll serve you up a breakfast that would do credit to Soyer himself," cried St. John, tying him self up in an old sheet like an impromptu ghost. And somewhat exhilorated In mind Mr. Kent went back to his guests, two cherry. cheek, bright eyed young ladies, who were wondering at the varioui marvels of sculp tor's studies. "How nioe it must bo here Cousin Percy I" cried Kate Wallance. " But, isn't it lonesome?" asked Mary Brown. Just then a mysterious cough sounded outside the door. Kent started up. "By the way," he said, you have not seen my view from the window you know Kate rushed at once to the casement but Mary pausing, to pick up the shawl her companion had dropped, had a view of St. John, who prompt to the second, rush- ed aoross the sceue, girdled In the white sheet, with a pot of chocolate in one hand, and the denuded rooster iu the other. She uttered a little scream. "Oh Cousin Percy, who i that?" ' Don't mind," stuttered Mr. Kent, a little disoomfltted. " It's only an eccen trio artist who baa a studio just beyond mine." " O," said Kate. " And what is behind that red curtain ?" "Only my books and things," said Mr, Kent "How I should like to see them,' said Mary. " Oh, they're not at all Inter esting I assure you," cried our hero hur riedly. " Strictly professional. And now I'll lay the cloth for our little unceremon ious breakfast." " I hope we havn't Inconvenienced you '." said Kate. "Oh, not at all," said Porcival, striving to speak with otr-hand nonchalance. "One of you will have to drink out ot a china mug, tho other from antiquated Pompeian vase." "We don't mind that at all," langhed Mary. " I didn't think Torcy, when you wore up in the mountains last summer, and invited us to one of your important break fasts, we should bo horo to test your hospi tality soon." Nor I cither," groaned Mr. Kent sutto voice, "llano I not a gram oi wuire sugar ? Will you excuse me a moment girls?" Certainly to be sure," cried Kate and Mary, in chorus. " Don't be at all punct ilious with us, I bog. And away sped Mr. Kent on tho wings of haste to the nearest grocery. "And now cried Kate Wallace, spring ing up, I'll see what's behind that red curtain." " Kato 1" cried her cousin warn ingly. " Well, why not? I know there s some mystery. Cousin Percy looked so queer when we mentioned it. Porhnps it's the Bluebeard chamber, wbero he keeps his dead wives. Perhaps ho has a sweot-hcart hidden in there." . " What nonsense, Kato 1" "Hush! Don't you hoar a rustling and rattling?" cried Kate, I am sure " Hi-kisk-um-m !" came an unvoluntry explosion from behind the cuitain, at this very eventful moment. "It's a robber I" shrieked Mary. "It's Blueboaid's wifo !" cried Kate half laughing and half frightened. "Oh, Kate don't go near it 1" whispered Mary, who bad grown quite white. But I shall, though !" cried Kato ' Didn't I shoot a bear in Uncle Hiram's pine woods? And do you suppose I am going to be frightened by a sneeze ?" And trippinir valorously forward she drew back the curtains with a jerk. There stood John St. John, red and flushed with cooking, and the white sheet relieving his rosy countenance, while his noBO and hair wore powdered with flour, and sundry cabalistio tokens of charcoal he had handled, ornamented his brow ; and in front of him the ancient fowl was friz zling away on the bars of a gridiron, and the pot of chocolate, frothed merrily on the glowing cals.. Mary uttered a shriek, and even . Kato recoiled at this unexpected tableau. While Mr. St. John retreating backward on a pile of clay moldings, upset the chocolate pot on his own feet and ankles, and with a howl like that of a wild Indian, tumbled prone over knocking an easel full of sketch es into the Are. . The next instance the rod curtain was in a blazo. The sceno of turmoil and confusion that ensued next, may easior bo imagined than described. Kate, preserving her presence of mind, threw her thick shawl over Mr, St. John's face, wull-nigh smothering him. Mary emptied a tumbler of water into . the flames, and pried " Fire ! Fire !" at the top of her lungs. Mr. Barrett; the Italian artist across tho hall, and Mr. Wakeburu, who printed in water colors next door, rushed to the rescue And when Percival Kent returned with Ave cents worth , of milk in a cracked pitcher and a cone-shaped package of sugar, he found John St. John sitting on the floor, with his left whisker singed, and Kato applying cold cream to his scorched nose, while Mary, with her handkerchief drenched in collogno, was trying to take the fowl off of tho gridiron bars, to which he persistently clung. ' I'm , sorry, old fellow," grimaced St, John, " but the breakfast is spoiled." " Never mind the breakfast," said Kate, " We have some crackers in our bag, said Mary. And it was all Kate's fault for being so curious." "Yes," said Kate, it was all my fault, I wanted to see what was behind the red curtain. And 1 did see. . " Hoes your nose feel very bad now ?" , " Not so very," said Mr. St. John, for the velvet touch of (he toft feroenine Aug. en was not disagreeable. And that was the end of Mr. Percy Kent's boasting about bachelor housekeep ing; and the beginning of the acquaintance ship there, ended in Kate Wallance chang ing her name to Kate St. Jobn.t JUOn a rainy winter evening a gentlo- man travelling in a cab found, on nearing bis destination, that he had no money with him, so thinking he would try the honesty of the cabman, he called out, as he ran up the steps " Walt a minute I have dropped a sovereign in the eab, and will get a light and search for it." The words were bare ly spoken when the cabman gvae the burse a furious lash, and drove off at a violent rate. The gentleman, heartily amused at the result, called after him rejwatedly, but never saw cab or driver again. ' When I have a cold in my head, said a gentleman in company, I am always remarkably dull and stupid. " You are much to be pitied then," replied another, "for Idon t remember ever seeing you without a cold in your head." Deacon Thrope'8 ; rifjeons. MANY years ago, when the orops in the Western States were about to be destroyed by the large number of pigeons that came about, Deacon Thrope and several of his frionds were sitting outside the meeting-house one Sunday morning, waiting for the minister to arrive, and, as matter of courso, talking about the pros pect of having "nothing to feed on" through the coming winter. . . i ' ' It's orful !" said one of the company. ' I nevor seen tho pigeons so thick before. My Bill and Bod weut down to the roost last night, and killed a bagful with clubs. think they'll take all my corn." "Oh, yes, it's orful 1" replied the others. "That's nothing td what mo nnd my 'cllx Joshua did, day before yesterday," said the deacon. " You know my bottom Aeld there ?" Well, they came in so thick you couldn't see the ground. I went down to scare 'cm out, and pcradveuture they nz np like a cloud, mm you couldn't seo the sky for 'em. I hollered and clapped my hands,and tore around until I was plum worried out, but did no good. They just swarmed around over my head ; and as fast as I went to one side of the field they began to pour down on tother. Felix Joshua had just got up to the crib with a load of corn, for ho was gatherin' the ridge field, and I went to where he was and told him to go to the house nnd get his shot gun and my shot gun, and we goes down. Ho slipped nlong on ono side of the field and I slipped along on tother, till we go1 about middle ways, and then I gin a holler, and up they flew like a whirlagust. I blazed away in the thickest of 'cm, and what do you think? They were all gone in a second men mo and felix josuua, we clem over the fence, and says he, ' Father, this beats all creation I' Says I to him. 'Go fetch tho steers and wagon,' and upon mv word and honor we picked up ten butlteU " Tho good brothers stared wildly around them, and probably would have accused their deacon of lying had they not been interrupted by the arrival of the preacher, and tho annoucement that meeting" was agoin' to begin." After the services were over, little groups of the faithful might have been seen here and there, engaged in earnest conversation. Their subject was an exciting one, as you might have inferred from the length of their faces and the earnestness of their gestures. If you had listened to their con. versation, you might have heard something about as follows : " Did you hoar what brother Thrope said 'bout him and his Felix Joslu, killin' ton bushels of pigeons at one shot." "Yes, it's orful, aint it?" " It's a lie as sure as shootiu'. I don't know what got into brother Thrope." " What'll be done about it ? It mustu't go so, it will ruin the name of the church. ' We'd better fetch it up next mcetin and make him take it back, or church him." And so it would go on. Of course the good deacon heard whixpers of it, which gave him no littlo uneasiness. However he had been in sovoral scrapes before, and bad come out clear, and he doubted not ho could meet with the same good luck on this occasion. Until the meeting day ar rived the entire settlement was in an up. roar. ' Nothing was talked of but Deacon Thrope's ten bushel of pigeons. The good brothers said it was too bad to have the church disgraced by a deacon who told such unreasonable talcs,, sighed, and said, " It is hard telling the power which the evil one exerteth." At last the exciting day, arrived. . The preacher stated the church was ready for the transaction of business, whereupon brother Fingle arose and said ; H Brother Deacon Thrope says him and his Felix Joshua killed ten bushels of pigeons at one shot. . The church don' believe it, and would love to hear what the brother has to stay for himself." With much solemnity the deacon arose, and after casting a serious look over the congregation, and elevating his eyes to the rafters a few times, spoke as follows: " Brethren, there is a sad mistake out I didn't say we killed ten bushel at one shot, but" w nat am yow say T" interrupted one of the brothers, who was present when the deacon first told about the pigeons. " Didn't you say you and Felix Joshua both blazed away f" " Yes." " Didn't you lay you both oloni over th fence?" ' " Yes, peradventure." " Didn't you say that Felix Joshua said, ' Father, this beats all creation.' " " I did brother." " Didn't you ' say that Felix Joshua fetched the steers and wagon, and you pick ed up ten bushels of pigeons? - ' "There Is the mistake, my brother," re plied the deacon, again raising his eyoa to wards the rafters. " I didn't say we pick ed up ten bushels of pigeons. Brother Fingle is mistaken j I said " ' Yes I know what you said!" Interrupt ed several; " you did say It, and we can prove It easy enough ? You can't come that game over us old boss-fly." "Order brethren," said the miulster ; ' let's hear brother Thrope's story, and then you can make any remarks you may wish." ; , . , Well, as I was say in'," resumed the doacon. I did't say we picked up ten bushels of pigeons Brother Fingle is mis taken I said we picked up ten bushels of eorn that the pigeons had cha'tored off." " Amen," went up from the congrega tion, and a rush . was make at Deaoon Thrope to shake him by the hand. It is needless to say that ' he was restored to good fellowship and confidence. , Scaring Off a Rival. was living at 'Squire Jones'. He had a gal, and she was pretty, you bet. I used to think she was pretty enough to eat. To say I loved that gal wouldn't be no description of my awful fooling ; but I was awful bashful I couldn't tell her about it; and to make the matter worse, there was a fellow coining to see Sally ; well, he came once a week just as regular as tho cows came up, and he'd buck up to Sally and set up half the night. . I hated him of course, and nobody could blamo me for it.,;r ,, . . I determined to stop him or bust. I fell on a plan, and told Sally's brother of It ; his name was Ike, and he was pleased and he went to work. : They were scarce of house, room, had a front and back room, which was used for a kitchen and a smoko house. , . ' Me and Ike slept in this back: room. The floor was made of puncheons, and ira mediately under our bed, and also under the floor, was the soap trough. It had about ten bushels of soft soap in it. Sally's beau was to be there that night, I told her I wanted to sleep with her sweet heart that night. She said all right. , He came dressed up in his best. He had one of those hiirh-collared, scissor-tailcd coats, new copperas pants, awful tight, high bee-gum hat, and a square yard cotton handkerchief around his neck. He soon cornered Sally, and mo and Ike went to bed but not to sleop. We raised the floor over the soap trough, took the boards off the bed, all only on the fire-side, where I was to lie just enough behind to hold up a bed without a fellow. , Ike lay before tho Are on a pnllot. I lay on my plank, holding very still. I began to think they would sit up all night ; but finally about one o'clock, he came in. And snored violently. .. Ho hauled off his linen, and over he crawled, and in he went, down into the soap trough. Of all tho snorting and kicking you ever heard it was there. I began to yell at the top of my voice. Ike was making a light, and just as he got a flaming pine-knot in full blast, the old folks came tearing in, in their night clothes tho old man with his gun and tho old woman with the poker. I had Sally's beau drawn out by this time, and stretched out at full length be fore the firo. The soap was half an inch thick all over him. Of all the sights lever saw, he looked the most terrible. A Ku- Klux wasn't nowhero. Sally camo witli her dress in her hand, and as she entored tho door, he broke. The dogs all weut after him outof hearing. But he don't come back any moie. A New Confidence Game, ' : , A well dressed young man stopped at a Vermont hotel last week for a few days, and mado acquaintances. Tho eveuiug of the second day of his arrival a nice young lady came along, unattended, and instant ly attracted the attention of, the improssi blo youngster, who canvassed hor charms freely as they sat apart from her at supper. The stranger youth even went so far as to say that he would marry her if she would have him, and offered, for a substantial wager, to pop tho, question and have the marriage ceremony performed right away. The wager was accepted, and also the pro posal of marriago, made so suddenly to her by the young man, and the parson called in, who soon united the twain. The sum wagered was paid over to the happy bride groom, and, he and his bride set oil next day on their marriage tour. Vbat lends romance to the circumstance is, the fact that the young couple had already boen man and wife for a year. A Vat Hung by a Watch Chain. A gentleman in West Nashville, before retiring for the night, took the precaution to place his watch and chain uuder his pi). low. He woke up the following morning to find that it had unaccountably been spir ited away. After looking everywhere about the room he found it forced half-way into a rat hole. He pulled it out, and to his great consternation found a rat at the end of tho gold chain, in which it hud be come entangled and hanged by tho neck until dead. , tWn old clergyman more distinguish ed for hlit piety than for the elegance of bis oratorical delivery once read aloud from the pulpit a byrau, in which occurs this line: " Life's like a shallow, how it flie I But pausiug V the middle of the word " Shadow," to take breath, the venerable parson astonished his hearers by , what seemed to read: " Life's like a ti oh, how It Hies I" 4 ST. ELMO HOTEL, T (formerly "the union,") ' JOS. M. FEWER, . , . Proprietor, 817 & 819 AB.Cn STREET, PHILADELPHIA. Terms, $2.60 Per Day. THE ST. F.LMO In centrally located and has been re-mtcd and refurnished, su that It will be found as comfortable and pleasant a stopping place as there Is lu Philadelphli 6) Neiv Millinery Goods .A.t Newport, Ia. . I BED to Inform tlip public that I have Justre. turned (rum Philadelphia, with a (ul assort ment ul the latest style u( MILLINERY GOODS. HATS AND rtONNKTfl. KIDHONa, FRENCH FLOWERS FEATHERS, i CHIGNONS. ,' .'!, LACE CAPES. NOTIONS, And all articles usually found In a first-class Mil linery Establishment. All orders promptly at tended to. WW e will sell all goods us Cheap as can be got elsewhere. DRESS-MAKING done to order and In tint la test style, as I get the latest Fashions from New York every month. Goffering done to order, In all widths. I will warrant all my work to give sat isfaction. All work done as low as possible. ANNIE ICKES, Cherry Street, near the Station, 5 16 13 Newport, Fa. Ileal Estate, Insurance, AND CLAIJI AGENCY. , LEWIS POTTER & CO., Real Estate Broken, Insurance, t Claim Agent New Uloomfield, Pn. "ITTE INVITE the attention of buyers and sell TT ers to the advantages we offer them In pur chasing or disposing of real estate through our of fice. We have a very large listofdeslrab property, consisting of farms, town property, mills, store and tavern stands, and real estate of any descrip tion which we are prepared to oiler at great bar- f;alns. We advertise our property very extensive y, and use all our efforts, skill, and dllligence to effect a sale. We make no charges unless the Sropcrty Is sold while registered with us. We alsc raw up deeds, bonds, mortgages, andall legal pa. pers at moderate rates. Home of the best, cheapest, and most reliable fire, life, and cattle Insurance companies In the United States are represented at this agency. Property Insured either on the cash or mutual plan, and perpetually at $4 and S5 per thousand. Pensions, bounties, and all kinds of war claims collected. There are thousands of soldiers and heirs of soldiers who are entitled to pensions and bounty, who have never made application. Sol diers, if you were wounded, ruptured, oroontract ed a disease in I lie service from which you are dis abled, you are entitled to a pension. When widows of soldiers die or marry, the minor children are entitled to the pension. Parties having any business to transact In our line, are respectfully Invited to give us a call, as we are conlldent we can render satlsfactiou In any branch of our business. r No charge for Informntlou. 4 20 ly LEWIS POTTER & CO. CARLISLE CARRLAGE FACTORY. A. B. S1IE11K has a large lot ot second-hand work on CfSpSJ? hand, which he will sell cheap lu order SjfaSil to make room for new work, ! FOR THE SPRING TRADE. He has. also, the best lot of NEW WORK ON HAND. You can always seo different styles. The material Is not In question any more, for it Is the best used. If you want satisfaction lu style, quality and price, go to this shop before purchasing elsewhere. There Is no tlrm that has a better Trade, or sells more In Cumberland and Perry counties. - REPAIRING AND PAINTING promptly attended to. Factory Corner of South auu put h ; Streets, 3 dp CAKL.18LK, 1A. Farmers Take Notice. rjlHE subscriber offers for Sale THRESHING MACHINES. JACKS and HOUSE POWER. With Tumbling Shaft, and Side-Gearing, Warrant ed to give satisfaction In speedy and perfect threshing, light draft and durability, on reasona ble terms. Also PLOUGH Of Superior Make. CORN SHELI.ERS. KETTLES, STOVES, i SCOOPS AND ALL CASTINGS, made at a country Foundry. Also, A G001 MILL SCREW, In excellent order, for sale at a low rate. I refer those wishing to buy to John Adams, Samuel Shuman, John ltodcn, Ross Ilench, at Icknsburg. Jacob Shoemaker & Son, Klllntts hurg; Thomas Morrow. Loysvillet John Flicking er, Jacob Fllcklngcr,. Centre. 62013 SAMUEL LIGGETT. Ickesburg, May 14. 1872. -QUNCAN BHKRMAN & CO,, IIANHKHN, ' No. 11 Nassau Street, NEW . YORK, ' Issue circular Notes and oircular Letters of credit available In any part of the world. -Current accounts received on such terms as may be agreed upon. (Siatf Ylck'g Floral Guide for1873T The GUIDE Is now published Qoarterly. TWENTY-FIVE CENTS pays for the year, four numbers, which li not half the cost. Those who afterwards send money to the amount ot ONE DOLLAR or more for Seeds may also order Twenty-ova Cents worth extra the prico paid for the Guide. The JANUARY NUMBER Is beantl'ul, giv ing plaus for making RURAL HUM F.S, De signs for Dining Table Drcoratlous, Wludow Gardens, &c, and containing a man of Infor mation Invaluable to the lover of flowers. One Hundred and Fifty pages on tine (luted paper, some Five Hundred Engravings and a superb COLORED PLATE nnd CHROMO COVER. The First Edition of Two Hundred Thousand Just prluted In English and Uermaa, ready to send out. JAMES VICK, Kechester, N. Y. I
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