THE- ITTSBtmG- 'DISPATCH; TUESDAY- SEPTEMBER"' 28f 1890. Ije Bigpafolj. ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY k. 1S4G, Vot-15 No. Z3. Entered at 1'lttslmrE l'ostofflce. ember 14, 1&7. as second-class matter. Business OEBce Corner Smithfield and Diamond Streets. News Booms and Publishing House 75, 77 and 79 Diamond Street. EASTERN ADVERTISING OFFlCi. ROOMS. TRIBUNE BUILDING. NEW YORK, -where complete flies of THE DISI'AICH can always be lound. Foreign aaTCrtliers appreciate the con venience. Home adTertlsers and friends or THE DltPATCH. while In New York, are also made welcome. THE DISPATCH is regularly on tale a Srenlano's, 5 Union Square, Jiew York, and 17 Ave. de FOpera, Pan. France, where any one who hat been disappointed at a hotel news stand can obtain tf. TERMS OF THE DISPATCH. rOFTAGE TREE IN THK TOTTED 6TATXS. jjailt uisFATCn. One 1 ear. tsoo DAILT DisrATCH, Per Quarter 2 00 Daily Dispatch, One .Mouth TO Uailt DiSPATcn, includinfrfcunday, lyear. 1000 Daily Dispatch, IncludlngSund.ij.Sm'tlis. ISO Daily Dispatch, Including bunday. lmonth so fcCOTAT Dispatch. One Year ISO A eekly Dispatch, One Year 1S5 The Daily Dispatch Is dcllTered by carriers at ;.'cenUcer week, or lncludlnc bunday edition, e 1 20 cents per week. PITTSBURG. TUESDAY. SEPf. 23. 1S90. AN IMPREx-lYE MGIIT. An extraordinary scene was enacted in Pittsburg's streets last night, Tbe parade of tbe German Catholic Societies was re markable enough in its way. They made a showing of which they may well be proud. The speeches of their leaders were excellent, and the American patriotism which appears iotbemisa very welcome sign. But even more remarkable than tbe festival and its cele bration were the mighty crowds which filled the city streets. All the principal down town avenues were packed with spectators, so that even the usually omnipotent cable car was paralyzed, and the red fire blazed upon mile after mile of upturned faces. It was a startling revelation of Pittsburg's power to pour out her populace. The Ex position and the many theaters all drew their thousands and still enough remained to densely crowd the lower part of the city. The sight was a surprise, and a very im pressive one. WITHIN HEED'S AUTHORITY. The effort of Speaker Eeed to mate the Democrats furnish him a quorum registered another failure yesterday, the two roll calls showing an aggregate of 159 present. The House was compelled to adjourn until the change of policy in the direction of getting tbe Republicans to furnish tbe quorum can make a better success. This joint fruition of the new rules, and the Eepublican policy of unseating Demo crats, is not without its poetic justice. The whole purpose of the new rules has been to bring the minority into subjection without consulting either their wishes or their par liamentary rights. With a full reliance on tbe ability of tne rules to do business, a portion of the Eepublicans have followed the Speaker's example in going away and looking alter their personal interests in business and politics. "When the Eepub licans undertook to unseat a member who was elected by only 4,000 majority, the Democrats took advantage of their oppor tunity and left the House without a quorum, where it is likely to remain until the Ee publican regime is able to get the Eepub lican majority together and make a quorum. "Wnile the deadlock has resulted in the suspension of business, it is hardly possible, with a just regard for human nature, to blame the Democrats lor taking advantage of the Eepublican policy of "doing busi ness" without regard for the minority, and putting its legitimate result in the light of doing no business at all. If the Eepub licans persist in the plan of conducting busi ness without the consent of the minority, they cannot blame their opponents for throwing upon tl.ein the responsibility of furnishing a quorum. And after the Speaker has tried to exert his disciplinary nuthontr to make the Democrats stay in and be counted, can he do less than send out and arrest the eleven Eepublican ab tees. and keep them on bread and water until tbe last party achievement of giving a Democrat's seat to a Eepublican is made triumphant? Mr. Eeed has failed to get a quorum from the Democrats. If be can make the Eepub licans come in and be counted, there is hope that tbe apparently interminable session of Congress will reach an end. UMFOUJIIir NEEDED. The necessity of uniform legislation, on marriage and divorce, has olten been illus trated where couples have found themselves to be married by the laws of one State and not legally married in another, or divorced in one State and still bound together in another Commonwealth. The most direct course to rectify these evils would be the adoption of a constitutional amendment placing that subject within the legislative power of Congress. New York has, how ever, taken a step in another direction to accomplish the same end, by appointing a commission to co-operate with other States for uniform divorce laws. Pennsylvania should join the movement. The next Legis lature should authorize the appointment of a commission, on the part of this State, to aid in remedying the present scandalous state of affairs. TOE ALLIANCE'S PROPER FIELD. The announcement of the National Farmers' Alliance arrangements with a .European syndicate to advance 532 per bale on cotton warehouse receipts up to a million bales proves what The Dispatch has said about the Alliance sub-Treasury scheme, that if agricultural products can be ware housed so as to afford good security, private capital will loan upon them, and it is not tbe business oi the Government to do so. In this case the security of cotton ware housed and insured is unquestionable. "With the millions of European capital seek ing investment, the employment of a por tion of it in aiding producers to carry their crops is legitimate and probable. As to tbe reports that this will be a means of cornering the cotton crop for the benefit of producers, a moment's considera tion will show that such an idea is utterly baseless. The arrangement contem plates that money will be advanced to thousands of cotton growers, any one of whom can, when he thinks tbe market high enough, sell bis cotton and redeem the loan. Beyond that it is to be noted that the reported arrangement con templates a loan on but about a sixth of tbe total crop. If the report is correct it may cause something oi an appreciation in cot ton; but that will only be because it relieves the necessities of that element among plant ers who have heretofore been forced to sell cotton for whatever it would bring, as soon as it could be got to market. Anything like the concentration which would enable the cotion crop to be withheld from market, after it has reached the price indicated by a attural condition of supply and demand, would be impossible under this plan or any other where there are a million pro ducers. "While this arrangement shows the use lessness of the Alliance and sub-Treasury scheme, it does not show the nselessness of tbe Alliance. It indicates the legitimate field of such an organization. There is little doubt that the factors and storekeep ers under the old methods of the cotton busi ness, took an undue, advantage of the needs of tbe cotton raisers for ready money. Tbis arrangement, whether the report is ab solutely correct or not, indicates what con certed action can do in the way of bringing a new element of competition into tbe busi ness of supplying the planters with funds. Individual action could hardly have accom plished this. United action can make a success not only in this particular respect, but in many other places where new compe tition is needed. The success of the Alliance in the South in defeating the Bagging Trust and in pro viding for loans at low interest justifies the enthusiasm of that section for this organiz a tion in its legitimate field. If tbe Alliance succeeds so well in aiding the planters of the South, there is certainly hope that an equal success can be made in mitigating tbe burdens of the Korthern farmer. THE BUILDING OF CITIES. A yery interesting indication of the rela tive progress of different cities throughout the country is furnished by the totals of the building statistics. The totals of structures erected in ISSO.'with their cost in 15 of the leading cities, with some allowance for local conditioLS, are a very good measure lor the growth and enterprise of the different com munities. In this showing Philadelphia maintains the lead, having nut up 11,965 houses, while New York comes next with 6,722. But in consideiing the cost of the buildings, New York is far ahead, having put $75,912,816 into new buildings, while Philadelphia's total of cost is but $26,000,000, and is exceeded by Boston as well as New York. These are the two cities whose new structures exceeded 5,000. Following these are six cities where between 4,000 and 5,000 houses were built, and six more whose totals are between 2,000 and 4,000, in the following order: JVo. Souses. Cost. Average Chicago 4,931 $25,065,500 $5,083 Brooklyn 4,500 25,679,405 5,706 Boston 4,431 32,400,000 7,312 Minneapolis 4,355 8,737,281 2,006 Washington 4,048 6.165,715 1,523 Cleveland 4,007 4.401,851 1,098 bt Paul 3,756 7,939,493 2,118 St. Louis 3.544 9.765.700 2.755 Pittsburg 3,241 8,000,000 2,468 Denver 2,741 10,807,377 8.942 Omaha 2.493 4,663,735 1,803 Cincinnati 2.104 4,113,214 1,969 In giving tbis comparison its proper value, it should be remembered that there are other things shown in it than the number of new buildings built. The total of cost shows the aggregate investment more clearly than the number of buildings, while the average cost of each building gives a better idea of the standard of architecture in each city than either of the other two. New York, while second in the number, is far ahead both in the total investment and in the average cost of buildings, which was 111,293. Philadel phia, while first in number and second in total cost, has an average for each building of but 52,172, which gives it the eighth place on the list in tbat respect. Pittsburg has to take the eleventh place for number of bouses, rises to the ninth for total investment, and its average cost of $2,468 gives it the eighth place. "While Cleveland is credited with 4,007 houses against Pittsburg's 3,241, her low average cost of 1,098 brings the total in vestment down to $4,401,854, or a little more than half of Pittsburg's. In comparing these figures the New York Sun thinks that the showing is best for the town where the investment is largest and the cost and character of the structures are the highest. This is true as regards the activity of the building trade and the volume of investments, but there is much to be said for the city which builds many and cheap houses. Such a city certainly provides homes for the working people more comfortably than where they are housed in tenements. Philadelphia's record as a city of cheap homes is one of which that city need not be ashamed. It is well to notice that the exact accuracy of these comparisons may be, modified by tbe different estimates of cost reported to the building inspectors. Also by tbe differ ent cest of building in the different cities. Every Pittsburger will know that the total of (8,000,000 reported for this city indicates an actual expenditure nearer $10,000,000. How this ratio will apply elsewhere is a matter of local practice impossible to include in the statistics. On the other hand Cleve land's very low average of J1.098 for each structure, while largely due to the mushroom growth of little frame houses in the out skirts of that city, is to be viewed in tbe light tbat the house which costs $1,000 in Cleveland will probably cost $1,400 or $1,500 in Pittsburg. This cheapness cuts down the total of investment, bnt it more than recompenses in the undoubted stimulus it gives to building operations. Pittsburg's place in this comparison, as in all comparisons of municipal growth, is much lessened by the municipal statistics representing but a portion of the whole community. If the statistics of Allegheny were included it would put Pittsburg in the list of cities that have built over 4,000 structures. If all of the suburbs could be included our community would likely be found the fourth in the number of buildings, and tbe sixth in total investment, instead of the eleventh and ninth respectively. Even with the limitations of its political division, Pittsburg will probably take higher rank in the comparison for 1890 than in 1889. AT LAST A SITE. There is satisfactory intelligence from Chicago that, by the positive stand of the National Commission of the "World's Pair, the project of straddling the Exposition from the Lake Front to Jackson Park is virtually squelched, and that tbe addition of "Washington Park to the possible sites has fixed the Exposition there. This ends a long and not very creditable struggle over the site, which might have been settled months ago, were it not for the obvious importation of considerations wholly foreign to the Fair enterprise. It is impossible to believe that any man of intel ligence could have supported the Jackson Park and Lake Front idea, except as it might aid or Injure local interests. Never theless, that site was selected by tbe local directors, simply on account of its bearing on real estate speculation or park projects for the city. The very plain talk of the National Commissioners last week put a quietus on that effort. "We are glad to be lieve tbat the "Washington Park site will prove all tbat is required for a great Ex position. Chicago now has two vears and a half in wbicb to build and organize the Exposi tion. Six months have beta wasted over the site and other matters which might have been settled in thirty days. The three months before that was wasted in Congress. If the enterprise is to be anything-more than a fizzle, a very different class of work will be required for the next two years. The whole country is interested in the success of the Fair; but to give reasonable hope Chicago and the commission must show a determina tion to recognize no other consideration in the work than to secure its unqualified success. That should have been the spirit from the first. If selfish and local interests had not been involved in the site questions, it could have been settled in May instead of Sep tember. The work might then have been in progress by this time. THE HOPE OF THE TWENTY-FIFTH. It is a sign of a healthy rewakening of old-time Eepublican sentiment in the Law rence, Mercer, Beaver and Butler Congres sional district to hear the name of Thomas "W. Phillips proposed for tho Harmony convention to-day. It is unnecessary to go over the incidents of confessed bribery which vitiated so absolutely the previous attempt at a Ee publican nomination in that district. A canvass mixed up with a criminal prosecu tion for corrupt methods is not encouraging. On the other hand, shouf J Mr. Phillips accept the place on the ticket there would be tbe assurance of a capable man in Con gress, nominated solely for bis personal strength and merits. Phillips is a sturdy Eepublican of the Garfield sehool. He is one of the type who "carry their sovereignty under their own hats," being an appanage of neither clique, corporation nor political managers. Tbe Democrats also meet to-day at New Castle to put up their man. Should Mr. Phillips be tbe Harmony nominee, it is dif ficult to see what the Democrats will gain by a ticket of their own, as they are in 7,000 of a minority. It should rather be their policy to support the Eepublican who stands on the anti-bribery platform, and who would make one of the most influential Congressmen ever sent from the district. Senator Hiscock has been beaten in the city of Syracuse, where his candidate for Assembly as left behind by a majority of 21L The Senator's opinion of Syracuse politics may now be expected to take on as gloomy a hue as that which be recently expressed concerning New York City. The information from a Parisian dealer in titles that a person with more money than brains can buy the title of count for 6,000, of viscount for $5,000 and of baron for a beggarly J3.000, ought to make active business for titles at sacrifice prices. When a man can get Into the nobility at such bard-pan rates what better investment can tbere be than to put bis money and marry an heiress on the strength of the tltloT Colonel John C. New asserts that his Visit to this country has no political signifi cance. Nevertheless if tbere are any booms ont in Indiana tbat do not consort with the President's tastes tbe owners of them will be discreet to keep them locked up at night. The Democratic papers are maklbg a good deal of talk about the political aspect of the election of George R. Davi, as Director General of the World's Fair, but the locality in which that election has the most bitter taste, is busily saying nothing. The recollection tbat Davis was the manager of the Gresham boom sits heavily upon the White House, yet It gives forth no sign. In taking his farewell of politics Mr. Butterwortb made a Parthian shot at tho party caucus, which hit it in tbe bull's eye, and causes the organic correspondents to refer to him savagely as "the Impecunious Secretary" of tho Chicago Columbian Exposition. Speaker Eeed asked two weeks ago, "what is reciprocity?" Last week his inquiry was, "what is a quorum?" The .fact that the reciprocity amendment has been agreed to in Conference Committee leads to the hope that tbe Speaker's first question has been answered, but the effort to satisfactorily solve the second one has been unavailing. "When the New York City Eepublicans have nothing better to do. they get together and continue to expel the ex-wicked Mr. GIbbs from tho party. But tbe ex-wicked Globs keeps right on nominating straight municipal tickets for the Republicans. The discovery tbat the amount which the recent President of the Argentine Republic transferred from the Treasury of tbat nation to his private ownership was $40,000,000, indicates that tbe possibilities of practical politics are even more golden in that South American land than in ourown glorious Republic Peof. E. STONE"WiGGiNShas announced that he is done with making weather predic tions. Tbe whole country should riso up and offer Prof. "Wiggins its sincere congratulations in haying at last arrived at a true estimate of himself. Napoleon Ives is now reported to be making more money than any other man in Wall street. This report awakens scoffs from the men who had to take five per cent on their old claims against him: but if he makes money enough be will be received back with the full rehabilitation in Gotham. If the agricultural department under takes the job of furnfshing the weather for tho country, the Secretary sbould be warned that none of bis artificial rain storms aro needed just at present. The discovery that Charles A. Dana was left out of tbe New York census, warrants tbe metropolis claiming that tbis shows at least 100,000 of the asserted 400,000 shortage. Tbat is about the value of tbe veteran, but always youthful, journalist, expressed in units of ordinary population. PEOPLE OF PEOMHIEHCE. But Butler once supported himself by mak ing chairs for 30 cents a day. His annual income now is said to be $200,000. Ex-Governor Cameron, of Virginia, it is thought, will take the stump for the Demo cratic party in that State this fall. Captain George Mackenzie, tbe chess player, is dying from consumption in Man chester, England, where he recently took part in an international chess tournament. David A. Tago art. Republican candidate for Congress in tne First New Hampshire dis trict, is a graduate of Harvard, class of 1878, and 32 years of age. He is President of the State Senate, and resides at;Mancbester. Miss Clara Barton, the famous Bed Cross nurse, lives quietly in Washington, shunning notoriety. She has an income of $8,000 a year from an estate she Inherited, bnt she spends only $2,000 of tbis sum, uevoting the rest to charity. Steve HOLCOUBE, the converted Louisville gambler, who is now one of tbe successful evangelists of the country, Is a slim, spec tacled man, usually clad in a closely but toned Prince Albert coat. He Is brimful of nervous energy. Hon. Basil B. Gordon, late Chairman of the"Virginia Democratic Committee, is almost completely restored to bis former health, and should tbe Legislature convene in January he will be in bis seat as Senator from the Rappa hannock district. Dr. W. M. Tatlor, of New York, is paid $16,000 a year, the largest salary paid to any Congregational minister. Three lnBrooklyn,vlz: Drs. Lyman Abbott, Storrs, and Behrends, re ceive $10,000 eacb. Dr. Gunsaulus, of Chicago, has a salary of $8,000. and Dr. Gregg, of Boston, has $7,000. Bib A. T. Goshorn, of Cincinnati, tells a re porter that when be was approached on the subject of the Director Generalship of the Chi cago World's Fair, he told tbe committee he would expect a compensation of $20,000 a year. Tbe news of the recommendation of plain Col onel Davis, of Illinois, for the position at a salary of $25,000 makes Sir Goshorn scratch his head in some amazement. . OUR SHORT STORIES. JIM COULTER'S REFORMATION. Yan comes Jim Coulter," said one of the group in front of tbe village saloon. "Hehain'tbeentertownln nigh on to three months," said another. "Less git him drunk," said the first speaker, and instantly called out, "Hi. Jim, come an' drink er dram with us." Coulter approached the crowd, shaking his head; when be had reached them he took his right hand from his pocket and held it up. The forefinger was missing. "See that tbar han" he said. "S'long as I carry hit 1 don't drink no lieker. I uster git 'drunk yero ev'y Sadday with you fellers, but I done stopped. I'd go home bi'lin' drunk an' mer po' wife ud try ter hide her feelin's an' keep ther child'en Tom knowin' wbut ailed me. She'd say, 'Run erway now, yer pappy ain't er f eelin' well, an' yer mus'n pester 'im.' She never said nuthin' terme'tall, buton'y said her pra'rs harder. Onst I got so drunk 'at I fell offen mer hoss an' lay in the br'ilin' sun for 'bout two hours. Tbe sun wasn't mo' 'n 'bout er hour high when I waked up and sot up in the road. Thar was mer hoss er eatin' uv grass, an' yero was me er settin' in tber sun. I ketched ther boss and headed fur borne. 1Lawdyt whut er pain they was in mer bead, an' bow bad I wanted wahter. BImeby I corned ter ther creek. Hit was er standm' in holes, beln' as bit was er powerful dry spell, I got down, I did, an' squenched mer thirst. Jis' as I was er gittin' up I seed a big pearch fish swim onder ther log. I was lyin' down an' I runned mer ban' in atter 'im an' sompln' bit me. Hit was a snake. Co'se I know ev'ybody say er snake cain't bite onder wahter, but I says, b'I, "See 'at ban'. I got on mer hoss an' lit oat fur home fas'. Mer finger was er hurt in' an' er swellin' till hit 'peared like hit ud bust. Hit lack ter skeered mer wife plum ter death. Bho give me whisky an' put camphire on bit an' sent er runner fur Doc Brown, Doc he come, an' 'o give me mo' whisky an,' truck. He saved mer life, but he couldn't savo mer finger. I was powerful sick. JQv'body said I'd die, an' 1 would ef I hadn' had my wife. She nussed me like onto a baby. She never said nuthin'. but I'd see 'er er cryin' when she thought I was er sleep. At las', after tbe finger was cut off an' -I 'gin ter mend, Doo he says, s's 'e, 'He'll do now'tboutany mo' my truck.' Mer wife she never said nuthin' but 'Jim,' so pitiful like, an' then she put er arms 'roun' my neck an' bust out er cryin'. I ain't er shamed nur erfeared ter tell yer 1 cried, too, boys, an' I says, 'Lizzie, fo' God I'll never tetch er drap uv lieker er g'n,' an' I ain't er goln' ter, nutber." A WOMAN'S REASON. A wom an got on a crowded cable car a few days ago and before she got into a seat tbe train started up with a jerk and she almost lost ber footing. The bag of eggs she bad in her band slipped, and but for the timely extension of a gentleman's bands would have fallen to the floor. As it was, only two or three egga escaped. "Plague take it," said tbe woman impatiently. "Sorry I conldn't have saved them all," said the gentleman, seeing that he was not going to be thanked: "too bad." "lndeedf" returned tbe woman. "Save them alt, eh? If you'd kept your hands away, there' d been no trouble. You men are always ' But the poor fellow bad escaped. WHAT AILED HER. ij HAVE something to tell you, Alfred." she said as tbey stood under tbe trellised portico previous to his departure "Jack AsnioD, to wnom x was engagea seven years ago, has returned." "Of course be can't insist on tbe engage ment," replied Alfred Vargrave, with emotion, "now that you have promised to be my wife." "No." (Rather hesitatingly.) "But he has become Immensely rich." 'Ton would have me release you, then, so that you might marry him?" exclaimed Alfred, fiercely. "No." (Still hesitatingly.) "I am only think ing whether you wouldn't amas3 a fortune sooner by going away for seven years than by waiting here for my uncle to die." THE CASE OF GIBSON. The carperters had just flnished.re-shingling his kitchen, and he was raking the old shingles up into a pile. "Hello, Gibson!" said a neighbor, "you'll have kindling enough to last all winter, won't yon?" "Yes." ho replied, with au inward glow of satisfaction; "and it makes mighty good kindling, too." "Good morning; Glbsonl" called out tbe family doctor, who drove along a few minutes later. "Been making some improvements?" "Yes." "It looks like a good job. And it will give yon kindling enough to last all winter." "Yes, I'm getting a good deal of comfort out of that." "Gibson," said the deputy sheriff, who passed along shortly afterward, "if you take good care of those old shlucles they'll last you for kindling all winter." , ' Yes," replied Gibson rather shortly, "I sup pose they will." Tbe driver of the wagon was the next. "Hello. Gibson!" he said, "you'll have klddling enough to last all winter." Mr. Gibson made no reply. He went on rak ing bis shingles somewhat viciously. "Morning, Glbsonl" exclaimed the Snnday School Superintendent a minute or two after ward, as be stopped and leaned over the fence. "You'll have kindling enough I see to last you all-" "Darn the kindling!" The Superintendent passed on with a shud der. "The next man that says that to me," mut tered Mr. Gibson, "will have a fight on his bands." "How does thee do, friend Gibson?" inquired the next passer, a genial old Quaker. "I see thee will have enough kindling to" "Go to thunder!" roared Gib3on. Of course be couldn't get a fight out of a Quaker, so be kicked a stray cat out of tbe yard by way of relieving bis feelings, and con tinued raking the old shingles without looking up. The pastor of Mr. Gibson's church was tak ing bis afternoon walk. Ho saw bis parish ioner at work, stopped a moment and looked at him and then remarked: "You will bavo kindling enough, Brother Gibson " Tbat was all he said. Brother Gibson, with out pausing to see who it was, yelled out: "Blank tbe blanketr-blank old shingles to blanknatlonl Blank your blank meddlesome mouth! If you don't light out of this, blank quick. I'll set the dog on your' Five minutes later Mr. Gibson, with trem bling baste and his pockets full of revolvers ready for instant use, was burning his shingles in tho alley. His case will come up before a meeting of tbe church officials next Sunday afternoon. A REMINISCENCE OE I860. tutajor William Irwin, an old-time politi clan who died In Harrisburg, Pa., the other day, was a delegate to the Republican National Convention in I860, when Lincoln was nominated. Among the many reminiscences of that historic occasion that the Major was fond of recalling was one in which several men whose reputations are now national figured amusingly. "A Republican convention was a novelty in I860," tbe Major used to say, "and hundreds of Democrats flocked to Chicago to see the fun that year. General J. B. Jackman, the stillest kind of a Democrat, but a great friend of Si mon Cameron's, was there, and never missed a chance to give Cameron a lift among the dele gates when be caught any of them outside. General Jackman bad built the greater part of the Philadelphia and Erie Railroad, and had made a fortune among tbe big ones of that day. He was a tiptop fellow, and being a true gen tleman, nobody enjoyed a little game of draw more than he did. The morning after tbe rati fication meeting over the nomination of Lin coln I was at the Briggs House, where all the Pennsylvania delegates stopped, and who sbould come along but General Jackman. "Hallo, Major," said he, "come in and have something." I went in and after we had bad something the General began to feel for his money. Every pocket was empty. There!" he exclaimed, "some Infernal black Republican has robbed mer I asked him how much he had lost. "Fifteen hundred dollars," he said. "No," be said, "hold on. Let me seel There was $250 that Aleck McClure pulled out of me on that full, when I thought sure he had nothing hut a bobtail flush; there's tbe $150 1 bad in tho jackpot tbat Tbad Stevens walked away with, and there's tbe $300 Andy Curtin coaxed away from me by standing pat on au ace flush and I thought it was only one of bis bluffs. That makes $7u0. By Jove! I'm luckier than I thought I; was. There's $700 saved out of the $1,500, and I'm only $800 out after all" THE LAUGHING MASK. Comedy In All Itk Forms The Editor An Irish Arab Gnlltr Without Crime Tony Paslor'a Star Other Ammrnrati. "The Editor," a new comedy in four acts by Louis Aldrlch and Charles Yincent was pro duced at the Grand Opera House last evening with the first named author in the title role. "The Editor" Jias but a semblance of novelty. and what is new is not very entertaining and certainly untrue to nature. The plot Is a com pound of varfous venerable tissues tbat bavo served American and other dramatists often and often. Tbe situations, and some of them are strong, we have seen many a time, and to tell tbe truth we are a trifle weary of them. The presence of Mr. Aldrlch in the cast in con nection with the climax of the second act re minds us very vividly of precisely the same heroic self-srcriflce on tbe part of tbe (rambler hero in "My Partnor," the play and character with which it is natural to asso ciate Mr. Aldrlch. Tho generosity or tho gambler, however, in taking the responsibility for tbe misdeed of another was not unnatural, for be does it for love of the girl who has bis heart. In "The Editor" a shrewd Western journalist confesses to forgery to shield a pros pective son-in-law with whom he is but slightly acquainted. This is not probable, surely. Tho story of "The Editor" has precious little to do with its title. There may be concealed in the unspeakable journalism of the West such an editor as Colonel John Hawkins, of the American Eagle, but he is not like tbe samples wo have seen. Nor does the broad-shouldered, jolly editor of the Amer ican Eagle talk like a newspaper man. Ills language savors more of the editor of fiction, tbe impossible person novelists have imagined sometimes, than of tbe editor of fact. But he is a benevolent being, a sort of good fairy whose function it is to defeat tbe villain at the proper moment, and to shed a mellow light of good humor and big heartedness over everybody. The plot Is of the slightest. The son of a banker is tricked by a wicked clerk of his father to raise money on some forged mining stock. The banker's son "needs the money to mako good losses at tbe races and Stock Exchange. The forgery is discovered, and the young man, in a very mysterious way, is obliged to take the blame. Tbe bad, bold clerk is cornered in the third act and compelled to sign a confession. That is the only motive of the play. There are several love stories of a thoroughly conven tional order wrapped about the single intrigue of tbe play. There are two scenes in tbe play wbich bave distinct merit. One is where tbe widow, who is mourning extravagantly for her husband, dis covers tbat ber "sainted Simon" bought a quantity of jewelry for another woman; the other is where Colonel Hawkins bluffs the ras cally Stephen Morton Into conlessing bis crime with a banana. Tbe first is admittedly pur loined from a comedy of Meilhac 4 Halevy's writing, and the second is not particularly new, out it is very effective. Mr. Aid rich would be far more at home in his old role of the Western gambler with a big heart, wno taiKS oi "parus ' ana punctuates ins sentences witb a pistol or a bowie knife. Still be is bluff and honest and wholesome, if he doesn't smell of printer's ink, as tbe editor of tbe "American Eagle." There is not tbe least occasion to regard the character as an offen sive caricature. It would donbtless be better for tbe world if many Western editors were cast in Colonel Hawkins' mold. He Is a thor oughly decent person, with a good many love able traits. What he lacks most Is color tbe color of real character. Alexis Markbam. as Sir Montague Moon, an English lord of tbe hackneyed sort that exists nowhere but behind tbe footlights, was fanny as far as the character would permit. A pleas ant little Incident was his singing of "Where Are You Going, My Pretty Maid?" with a mock ronlade on the refrain. As far as acting went, nobody else had very mucb opportunity, and what he bad as tbe very washy banker's son. Mr. Edgar Weir did not appear Jto be able to do very forcibly. Miss Dora Goldtbwaite looked very charming In widow's weeds, and still more fair In gayer attire. Miss Hungting ton and Miss Haines did what little they bad to do well enough, and Mr. Lee made a cool and thoroughly unnatural villain. Stolidity and stiffness were tbe only characteristics of a banker that Mr. Willlard could compass. Tne audience received tbe play with mild ap proval. In tbe third act, however, when Mr, Aldrlch as Col. Hawkins threatened to kill tbe villain, an inebriated enthusiast in the parquet shouted out, "Give it to him." The house roared, and the actors had hard work to keep their faces straight. The BIJon Tbenter. "An Irish Arab," wbicb was produced at tbe Bijou Theater last night before a fairly large ( audience, may be best described as a farce comedy melodrama. It is a vehicle in wbich Mr. Bobby Gaylor can ride to glory. "The Vet eran" by Lester Wallack, is the basis of "An Irish Arab," butllttle more tban the outline of tho plot has been retained. There are great chances for scenic display in tbe piece, and these have been taken advantage of fully. The scenery painted by Harley Merry is extensive and of remarkably good quality. In tbe role of the IiishArab Mr. Bobby Gaylor caught the house from first to last, and although the fun at times degenerates into silliness, there is no denying that there is lots of food for laughter in the play. The costumes are very brlghr. and the groupings show ex cellent stage management. The company is a good one, Miss Jessie Story, Clarence Handyside and Marie Rene being especially clever. Tbe Lamartine brothers gave a won derful tumbling performance in act IV. Three more graceful and accomplished acrobats bave never been seen here. The audience expressed its approval of the performance in unmistaka- 'blo fashion, calling Bobby Gaylor twice before the curtain. Harris Theater. "Guilty Without Crime" Is a well-adapted stage version of Miss Braddon's "Aurora Floyd," probably the best known and most popular of that prolific author's works. The story is sufficiently well followed to be of in terest to those who bave read tbe novel, and the characters in some Instancesare even bet ter drawn. To be sure, Isaac Phinsky, as de picted by Charles M. Hayne, Is too stagey and overdrawn; but Stella Douglass, at the hands of Miss Ramie Austen, is excellently done. By tbe way, Miss Austen has improved greatly in her acting since her appearance here in "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" last season, as well as In her looks. She is now a truly beautiful woman, as well as a painstaking actress. In form and feature she has few rjvalsto fear. Dore Davidson's Tom Rawson is a piece of ex cellent work. Mr. Davidson's fingers became educated in tbe bistrionic way as Dr. Jekyll, so tbat they almost speak, and bis attention to details is bo conscientious as to provoke admi ration. Miss Maud Peters is pretty, despite her little lisp. The theater was packed to tbe doors at both performances yesterday, and this will doubtless be tbe story of the' present en gagement to the end on Saturday night. William' Academy. Tony Pastor's Own Double Company of Vari ety Btars, at Harry Williams' Academy of Music this week, delighted a large crowd last night It is without a doubt the best thing that has been seen at this popular variety bouse tbis season, and even rivals the best of any season. It starts out funny, becomes excruciatingly laughable, and in the end leaves the andience in a hysteric state of hilarity. Its variety of ex hibitions is marvelous. Tbe show opens with Lurle and Lurle in a very funny act on tbe fly ing rings. The act of Miss Edith Vincent with voice and feet followed, and was excellent. Then Kelly and Ashby broke the crowd all up in their "Fun in a Chinese Laundry." The act is entirely new, and the feats of tumbling as tonished tbe old regular patrons of the house. Tbe inimitable Maggie Cline, with a budget of fresh songs, is with the show, and, as usual, she bad to sing them until she got tired. The star of tbe show. Miss Bessie Bonehill, the great English artiste, preceded the afterpiece, and is a whole show in herself. She has a number of character songs which she sings witb pleasing grace, and makes an entire chance of costume for each song. Tbe cos tumes are gorgeous, to say in the least, and the like of them bavo never been seen before In this city. Miss Bonehill capturecUbe hearts of ber audience, and this is sayliig a great deal for an Academy crowd, with whom an English singer has up-hill work. A good week's busi ness is assured for the show. The bouse was packed, notwithstanding tbe outside attrac tion, the big torchlight parade. The Clipper Theater. ' , Sun's New Phantasma Company which ap peared at the Clipper Theater yesterday ts a pretty bright organization. George Sun him self gave a remarkably clever exhibition of juggling feats with balls, knives, umbrellas and flaming torches. His throwing and catch ing of five carving knives is wonderful, and the more remarkable in a man who bas not tho use of bis legs. Miss Alice Kinsley's imitation of tbe masculine was good, and her singing was a good deal above the average. Miss Kingsley also assisted Charles T. Aldrlch in a laughable sketch. In tbe course of which the latter dasbed off a pretty fair portrait of George Washington and some other clever bits of color. Master Kenn's contortion act, tbe dancing of Mullally, Bice and Mullally, and tbe little Sisters Locktt, curiously talented chil dren, won the audience's approval. There were several other acts about which nothing need be said, but the gross indecency of a pair of performers nameu May Miller and Frank Bues calls for bearty condemnation. Davis' Fifth Avenne lUn.cum. Tbere is a little section of Japan at Davis' Fifth Avenue Museum this week, and a very entertaining sight It is. lbey are real Japs in native costume: and they piy their trades and' arts in booths of the Japanese sort, right before tbe public. Tho artist who paints on paper, silk, plush, china, wood, or anything else tbat comes handy baa tbat wonderful knack, known only to the Orientals, of dashing off a brigbt-hued sketch of flowers and birdR in the impressionist stylo in a few seconds. The embroiderer in silk Is equally facile and effective. Teer are worker in wood and other motals, and a young woman in Japanese costume dispenses tea. It is a reallv pretty and refined exhibition, and tbe presence of many ladies and children in the audience testified to tbe character of its appeal. In tbe theater the black art performance by Agrippogave particular satisfaction. Among the other attractions are Evans, tbe club swinger, Howard and Doyle, living statuary and dancers, the Welches, and the smart little Gleasou children. Tho World's Dloicnm. The popular Allegheny resort enjoyed a full share of patronage yesterday. A full return for the price of admission is given at this house tbis week. Tbe beautiful Albinos, the Martin sisters, Signor Martha, tho musical wonder. Master Charles Green, tbe thinnest man In the country, and thb only Crowlee, who bangs him self four times a day witb most satisfactory re sults to himself, are among tbe attractions. Tbere is also a good variety performance In tbe theater, in wbich Kennedy and Moore, the comedians: Eugene Mack, the female imper sonator; De Orm, the Lor re US and other clever artists appear. SOME LIVE TOPICS To be Voted on nt the Exposition An Im portant Prize Essay Contest. Tbe Exposition has entered upon its fourth week. Since the opening day, visitors have had an opportunity to vote upon a variety of popular topics, and thousands have taken ad vantage of Thb Dispatch Poll Book to ex press their views tbercon pro and con. This popular mode of gauging public opinion will be pursued by The Dispatch until the close of tbe big show. For the opening days this week visitors are requested to cast their bal lots and make such remarks as tbey see fit on the following topics: " TUESDAY'3 TOPICAL BALLOT. Should the President of the United States be Chosen by Direct Vote of the People? Open to Gentlemen Voters Only. WEDNESDAY'S TOPICAL BALLOT. Should the Granting of Liquor Licenses be Placed in tbe Hands of a Commission? Open to Lady and Gentlemen Voteis. Vote Aye or Nay on the foregoing at Dis patch Headquarters, Brunswick-Balke-Col-leuder Billiard Company's Space, Exhibition Building. On account of the bulk and variety of the competitions for the Prizes offered by Thb Dispatch for the best essay on the measures to be taken to promote the growth and prosper ity of Pittsburg, The Dispatch has decided not to detract from their importance by another essay contest until after tho pending awards have been made and the competitions pub lished. The topic is of vital importance, and h e public must be given opportunity to digest (be views of tbe writers without being turned in other and lesser channels. THEIE W0EK FINISHED. Last Session of tbe Conference of United Brethren Ministers. rSPECIAL TEL EC BAM TO THE DISPATCH. Findlat, September 22. The Sandusky Conference of the United Brethren Church, which has been In session in tbis city for the past week, finished its business this morning, after making the following assignments of ministers for the ensuing year: " East District, L P. Lea, presiding elder Shiloh, A. H. White; Chicago Junction, H. Doty; Tiro. W. V. Davis; Bloomville, J. H. Arnold; Haney Creek, R. Trask; Baysbore, A. J. Teems; Green Springs, I. E. Ebgle; Nevada, A. C. Slddell; Port Clinton. J. Kirk; Bascom, J. A. Young: Rising Sun, S. H. Tussiug; Shel ley, L Grouse: North Robinson, C. F. Hill; Attica. W. F. Whitaker; Sycamore, J. F. Sargeant; Clyde, A. Z. Freibergcr; Osceola, A. E. Fitzwater; Helena, A. Powell: Carey, W. H. Evans; Fostoria, W. O. Fries;, Lacarne, J. E. Barnes; Elmore. J. G. Hofacre; Burgoon, W. P. Bender. West District: W. A. Keesey, presiding elder; Vanlee. C. T. Dane; Salem, R. French; We3t Independence, L. Sharp; North Baltimore, S. H. Radebaugh: Findlay. LJ. Gardner; Rawson, L. Moore; Towa, W. R. Arnold; Bluflfton, A. F. Lizht; Columbus Grove, G. L. Bender: Ottawa, H. L. Snyder; Leipsic M, Snook; Kelfersville, R. A. Bates; Dupont,P. H. Tussing: Defiance. L. D. Ingle: Maliuta, H. G.Scddinger: McClure, J. Sleller; Beaver Creek, G. R. Fisher; McComb. W. J. Estenbrook; Haytsville, W. W. ' McCluro; Dowling. E. S. Wells; Bowling Green, J. W. Hicks; Portage, M. B. Lanker; Marlin. Joseph McOeary. The next conference of tbis church will be held in Fostoria next September. Again That Hair-Trlgger Mouth. From tbe Kansas City Star. Tbe Democrats at Holr, JIo., burned John J. Ingalls In effigy last night. That, however, will hurt tbe Kansas Senator a great deal less tban bis senseless and ill-timed speech at Pittsburg. ALL THEOTJGH THE STATE. BASS fishing Is reported superb at Conneau Lake. Potatoes are reported plentiful in Erie, and are selling at 75 cents per bushel. A North East, Pa., farmer will clear 8100 from two acres planted in grapes. Mast cherry and plum trees are reported In blossom in and around Harrisburg. 'A BIO Republican clambake will be given by Chester political clubs on September 25. AN Oil City firm is advertising 'new baby carriages for sale." Old babies can walk. Meadvilie expects to bave its incandes cent light ready for use before tbe close of September. . At tbe funeral of Abraham Laubach. of Kaston. on Wednesday afternoon, bis four sons acted as pall-bearers. John W. Gilbert, one the best known business men of Bucks county, died suddenly recently at the Bush House, in Quakertown. ABRAHAM Drey and bis wife, of Friedens burc. died within a few hours of each other last week, and were buried together in a single ' grave. HEHRi lux 12-Ltib, ui run VUUIUU, IX III possession of a common barlow pocket-knife made in England in 1760. Its blade is still perfect. There is a horse chestnut tree la HarrS burg that is already leafless. On, certain branches, however, may be seen a vigorous growth of blossoms. The thirteenth annual reunion of tbe Seventh Pennsylvania Cavalry will be held at Muney, Lycoming connty. Pa., Tuesday and Wednesday, October 28 and 29, 1S90. Jo HN Bhott, aged 80 years, died Saturday at Harrisburg, of consumption. As none of his friends claimed the remains the v were taken to thePoorhouse burying ground for interment. AT Port Clinton, Berks county, a superior quality of stone has been found, which, when crushed into sand forms an excellent article for the manufacture of glass. Machinery is now being put Up for crushing the stone on a large scale. Mrs. Augustus Drkibelbis, of Virgins vllle, Berks connty, has a dahlia plant in her yard with SO flowers and many buds. Mrs. Abraham Blank, of Lanark. Lehigh county, bas an elephant plant whose leaves measure GO inches in length. DEATHS0 A DAY. Frank Ij. illarer. WASHINGTON, Sentember 12. Ex-Congressman Frank L. Morey. of Lonlslana. died in this city at an early hour this morning. Malarial troubles contracted. It Is believed, during the time of the recent heavy flood. In Louisiana, when nis plan tation was Inundated, combined with brain affec tions, were tbe causes of his death. Martin Wngncr. Mr. Martin Wagner, a well-known gentleman of Pittsburg, died yesterday at the ate of7S years. He was the father-in-law or Lieutenant of rollce George Snyder, from whose residence, on Taylor Mrcct. the funeral will occur, on Wednesday, at 10 A. H. Hon. Wllllnm Ilellninn. erxsaythLT, September H-Hon. William Hellman, ex-Dtate Senator and ex-Congressman, died this forenoon after a protracted illness. Be leaves a large family. SNAP SHOTS IN SEASON. Heroes get the monuments and tbe medals, and cowards live to look at them. Go slow. Life Is long enough to allow us to move leisurely; but tbe majority seem to think otherwise. How we hurry, to be sure. We run when we sbould walk; we ravenously bite food when we should chew it; we snatch sleep when wo sbould court it; we talk in breathless haste when we should be deliberate, we exhaust ourselves In tbe pursuit of pleasure when we sbould sip its sweets slowly in fact, we act, to use an apt phrase, as If "each minuto will be our next" This is not necessary at alb Energy is all right, but when misplaced it is all wrong. And bow the propelling powers of railroads and ships are being pushed to satisfy tbis cry for haste and speed! They are over crowded with steam and fly on rail, through river, lake and sea in the mad race against Time. Here a loose tie. a misplaced switcb, and, presto! mangled flesh and bones, cries and groans Eternity! There a crash and a bang, hissing steam, struggles, 'prayers, curses, a watery grave Tbe Endl And all staked on Get There all lost by tho fall of a stone, the snapping of a bolt, tbe slip of a wheel, the breaking of a cog, the going out of a light. If tbey had gone slow the danger signals could have been displayed, the bolts replaced, the obstruction removed, tbe collision avoided, the boiler preserved. So eo slower. Don't run through the sunshine only to get stuck iu the shadow. Take life on tbe installment plan. Do your duty, bnt do it deliberately. Live to die in your bed surrounded by what friends you may bave instead of being gathered up in bits or coffined in water. Don't take the desperate chances that are tbe mile posts on the slippery road to Get There! The only time lazy men display energy is when they shirk work. Mr. Comfort bas decided not to run for Concress in tbe York-Adams district. Sensi ble. Congress is not a comfortable place any more. The courts are almost as well patronized as the churches. The girl who listens to the soft words of a lover feels tbat his voice bas the right ring In it a wedding ring, as it were. Scientists say each adult body carries enough phosphorus to make thousands of matches. Tbis probably accounts for tbe flame called love which is developed when men and women are thrown In contact with each other. It facts are stubborn things, Mr. Grover Cleveland must surely be a fact. People who would take object lessons in affection should cultivate a dog. A uule can transact tbe same business as the House recorded tbe other-day. The fellow who told yon so will be around again early in November. Before yon board an ocean racer yon must plank down your fare. The "grass" widow is tbe feminine dude. You cannot tell what it Is. The spunkiest game fowls bave the thinnest combs. Cupid is breaking down tbe bars between the Hebraic and Christian beliefs. Love laughs at religion as well as locksmiths. So Ingalls loans money to Western farmers at 18 per cent interest. If there be a Jessica iu Kansas there may be trouble ahead for Honest John. The cleverest rogue has the smoothest tongue, but it is destined to bo used just once too olten. Humanitt is like a colony of red ants. When the stone is lifted tbe ants fly about In their misery jnst as If there were no other stones to crawl under and be happy. We are easily agi tated and made miserable, notwithstanding the fact that quietness and sunshine can be found if we look for it. If you walk upright yon need not worry about your name getting into the newspapers. If Speaker Reed would transfer the cold-tea restaurant to tbe floor of the House he would always have a quorum. The wife of a blind man bas to clothe mind instead of body to fascinate her lord. WnEN'smokeless powder is universally used, tbe well-worn phrase about the smoke of battle rolling away will bave to be turned down. The war correspondents will have to speak of tbe smell subsiding, or something similar. Sarah Bernhardt has decided not to use a poisonous asp in "Cleopatra." If the snake bites her she will survive; but the serpent will probably die. Don't overtax tbe little minds of the occu pants of tbe over-crowded schoolrooms. From tbe number of books many of the wee ones carry it would seem that soma teachers are crooking backs as well as burdening brains. Go slow, there. The principal crop in Kansas seems to be mortgages. It's hard to raise them, too. An ill-natured baby Is a crying evil. Because an organ bas stops Allegheny Councils should not stop the organ. An Irish Arab and a stage editor! Well, well. Tbis is the, height of unrealism to be sure. They cannot even' whisper secrets or scandals in tbe Sioux City Corn Palace. Tbe walls have ears.you know, lots of 'em. M onet didn't get tight on mint juleps, at all events. Perhaps Mind-reader Johnstone can guess what tbat Is at tbe wet end of a cigarette. The only notes that can ba profitably made are marginal notes on tbe edge of a clever book. Tbey bear good interest. , Woman is all right in a great many fields formerlymonopollzedby men. But when she whittles a stick, throws a stone or sees a mouse the dear creature Isn't in it at all. The American pie is squealing in the Eu ropean Cnstom Houses. It's root, hog, or die, now. Reed is bending a bit He'll straighten out all the same at-the proper time. Sullivan plays in "Honest Hearts and Willing Hands." Of John's heart we cannot speak. That his bands are in tho right place is evidenced by tbe broken noses and blue eyes in various sections of the country. You cannot always guess the contents of a package by looking ai"the paper it is wrapped in. , The out-of-town visitors to the Exposition are calling on tbe shopkeepers who advertise. Send iu your cards, gentlemen. Tbey look to us for letters of introduction. The man wbo courts arrest is flirting with the blind goddess. Willie Winkle. PBECIOUS METAL IN CLAY. Prof; Blraeh Claim He Con Extract Aluminum for n Few Cect. Chicago, September 22. "I have solved the problem of extracting aluminum from clay said Prof. Joseph M. Hirscn. who bas been at tacked as a traud, but is preparing to manu facture 2,000 pounds of aluminum weekly at two nve-story buildings. "Pure kaolin or clay," continued the chemist, "contains 53 per cent of aluminum. From the clay which I am using I can get lbji per cent m etal: that Is, from two barrel', or 600 pounds, of clay I can cot 10O poumM of aluminum. Prof. Richards, of Lehigb University, in his new work on alumiuum, intimates tbat the metal cannot be extracted from ciaV in the manner that 1 have done it But nevertheless, I do extract it and in an entirely new manner, enabling me to produce aluminum t a few cents per pound." " CURIOUS CONDENSATIONS. In the Desert of Sahara apparently in exhaustible veins of water bave been found in artesian wells lately bored there. A squash at Colfax, N. M., is under guard day and night. It now measures eight feet four inches around and is still growing. Physical education has been suspended in the New York public schools tbis year from lack of an appropriation necessary for the purpose. The fashion for men to wear wedding rings is greatly on tho increase in England. Heretofore the English have professed to con sider ian affectation. The champion butter-producing cow of the world Is named Euratlsamas. owned in Massachusetts, and ber record is 945 pounds and 9 ounces of butter in one year. Eobert Insraham, ot Philadelphia, a guest of Captain Eieboltz, at Gettysburg; found a gold cbaln on that battlefield. It was prob ably dropped during the battle. A column of army worms invaded Woodbridgc. Cal, recently. It was half a mile long and was followed by immense swarms of blackbirds, which preyed upon them. In a certain Maine town there is a dove which regulary every Sunday during summer flies into church, perches on the orpin, and listens to tbe music with much evident satisfac tion. A town in England, Skiddaw, Cumber land, stands unique as a township of one house and one solitary male .adult inhabitant This man is deprived of bis vote because of tbe fact that are no overseers to make out a voter's list, and uo church or public building on which to publish one. if made. The men employed in the German fac tories in which smokeless powder is manufact ured hare been provided with rubber masks to protect them from tbe fumes thrown of by the chemicals entering into tbe composition of the powder. Heretofore the men have suffered greatly from this cause. A Neosho, KaD., county farmer sent this mixed order to a Cbanute merchant: "Send mer.a sack of flour, five pounds of cof e and one pound of tee. My wife gave birth to a big baby boy last night also fire pounds of corn starch, a screwdriver and a flytrap. It weighed ten pounds and a straw bat" There is a country store in Arkansas which Is defended by a spring-gun. The gun bas caused tbe death of seven different robbers in the last four years, killing two at once one night last week. The owner of the store Is out in a local paper advising the fraternity to tacklo something else a stage or railroad train. There is now in San Francisco a vol ume tban which there are few more valuable in tbe world. It is worth exactly S30.0COL It is a registry of the whereabouts and Identity of 3.000 Chinese corpses in tbe city cemetery, all of which have to be dug up and returned to China in due time, while a disinterment per mit costs 510. There is a mule down in Coffee county, Ga.. that bas been running wild for several months and still defies arrest He has been driven into a lot, but be will not let anybody come near blm. Wben a person approaches with a halter, the rambunctious animal stands on his fore feet and circnlates his hind feet all around tbe horizon with the rapidity of a cy clone. The oldest law suit on record was on trill during the past spring and summer In tbe highest Russian tribunal at St Petersburg. It .was began 600 years ago by the heirs of a dead nooieman agarose me city oi namenes-.roaoisK for the recovery of a large tract of land which the municipality bad Incorporated within their city limits. It is needless to say that a decision bas not yet been reached. TheEev. T. N. Blanvelt, of Eoselle, N. J., bad a narrow escape the other day. He was sitting on a lounge at his home with pencil and pad jotting down points for bis Sunday sermon, wben a bolt of lightning struck tho side of tbe bouse. The glass in the windows was shattered and a piece ot wood splintered from tbe lounge on which be was sitting; Mr. Blauvelt felt tbe shock, but was not Injured. " The other day a white man sat down on tbe steps of a store near tbe court house in Americas, Ga., and went to sleep. While asleep he fell off the steps and cut his head quite badly. Strange to say, the man didn't wake at all. and he didn't know anything of his injuries until a patrolman woke him. An artery was cut and tbe man might have bled to death bad he kept on sleeping. The man was not drunk. Years ago in Japan there was a coin called the monseng; which was worth only about one-two hundred and twenty-fourths of a penny. It was an iron piece. In England we bave had a piece worth no more than a quarter ot a farthing, and a very pretty piece It Is. A piece of one-third of a farthing was also minted in tbe reign of George IV. and William IV. II In good condition, it is now worth a shilling as a curiosity. A short courtship is reported from Maine. Deacon Marvin, one of the early set tlers of Buckfield, one day mounted bis horse with only a sheep skin for a saddle, ba rode in front of the house wbere Betty Lee lived, and without dismounting, requested Betty to come to him. On ber coming be told her that the Lord had sent him tbere to marry her. Betty, without mucb hesitation, replied, "The Lord's will be done." The postal business in the London House of Commons is something tremendous. During tbe session wbich has just closed 418 money orders were issued and paid, and 7,281 postal orders. Nearly 70,000 telegrams were received, and stamps exceeding tbe value of $15,000 were sold. The daily average of letters delivered at the House was 12,000. and the number posted was 3,700. And yet people won der tbat public business progresses so slowly. There are but two words in the whole range of the English language containing all of tbe vowels in their regular order. Tbey are ab stemious and facetious. The following words each have them in irregular oroer: Authorita tive, disadvantageous, encouraging, efficacious, instantaneous, importunate, mendacious, nefa rious, precarious, pertinacous, sacrilegious, simultaneous, tenacious, unintentional, ob jectionable, unequivocal, undiscoverable and vexatious. A short search through the dic tionary might bring several others to light Almost in tbe exact geographical center of Wyoming is a mountain of solid hematite Iron ore, with 600 feet ot It above ground, more than a mile wide, and over two miles in length. Besides tbe iron, the mountain contains a bed of lignite coal large enongh to warm the entire world for a century, a dozen of dried-up lakes of soda, where the soda is deposited to a depth of overotO feet some of the lakes beins over COO acres in extent In a mountain adjoining there is a petroloum oasin i-irger man inose oi Pennsylvania and West Virginia combined. Out of some of tbe springs puro rectified coal oil is trickling at the rate of 20 to 30 barrels per day. BETWEEN 61 P-i OF COFFEE. Mrs. Passifer (reading) "Whitewash will destroy the cholera fterms. Passifer If I meet one I will give It a coat Im mediately. Chicago Jnter-Oeean. The Visitor But why become engaged if you never meant to marry him? In the nmnmock Because hels so sensitive. You know it mortifies a man much more tu he re fused than to have an ensajtement broken. Life.', Robbie "When I get to be a man I'm gc 1dk to be a printer. Papa Whv'sof Kobble (smacklnr his Ups)-'Caue Mr. Type, the printer np the way, says they always have lot of "pi." St. Paul a lobe. "Isn't Jones a Christian scientist a be liever In the faith cure?" "Hels." 'Is It true that be wouldn't have a doctor for his wife the other day when she was sicM" "It is quite true." "Well. 1 saw a doctor go Into his house Jail now." . Oh, that's Vllxljrlit, He's sick now himself." Cape Cod Item. - Bjinks Pugilism has suffered an irrep arable loss In Snlllvan's going on the stage. BJabbers-Ul don't think poozlllsm lsnurted half so much as the staie, and what's more our blnators and lUpresentatlves are goln.' Into pooglll.m. kifttngt. "How are you?" exclaimed a visitor at the Capitol, as he chanced to meet tbe Congress man from bis district Hush: not so loud." What's the matter? Anybody after yon?" "No. bat there isn't any telling where a quorum Is going to strike." Washington Pott. Bill I just heard from Jim Ketchnm. He's been making loads of money out af some tla mines in Dakota. Jack Did he get anv tin out there? Bill Certainly. It was from an English syndi cate and not from the mines, however. Sitingt. Mr. Barclay S. Capper "Where have you been, old man? Mr. T. C. Monte At Niagara on business. How did you make out?" 'No a-ood. The carriage men doa't give aj body else a Aoit"Siflingt. i .;fi
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers