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ISTABUSHED FEBRUARY 8. 1S46L
Vol. W, No. S3. Entered at Pittsburg Po.toffice,
November 11, 1SS7, as second-class matter.
Business Office-97 and 99 Fifth Avenue.
News Booms and. Publishing House 76,
77 and 79 Diamond Street.
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PITTSBURG, THURSDAY, MAY 16, 1589.
INDEPENDENT BETINEES' STRUGGLE.
The Inter-State Commerce Commission
yesterday commenced the investigation of
the complaint of the independent refiners of
the oil regions. Of the actual merits ot the
case under the law, it is difficult to givea
reliable opinion; and the decision of the
Commission is a still more uncertain
quantity. Bat the precedents of railroad
"management establish a presumption that
the independent refiners are not given a
fair show as against the Standard; and both
public justice and public interests support
the wish that they shall be enabled to main
tain their business.
This is especially to the interest of he oil
producers. It should have been plain years
ago, that the salvation of the Pennsylvania
producing interests lay in the encourage
ment of independent refiners, and the conse
quent competition of purchasers of erode for
actual use. Bat since the intention of the
Standard to go into the refining of Lima
oil is beyond dispute, the matter is placed
beyond question. "With an independent
interest to refine and market the Pennsyl
vania oil, its superior quality will place it
above the competition of the cheap Ohio
product; but if the Standard is left in
supreme control to play one field against
the other, as it has done for the last year,
the doom of the producers is sealed.
"We hope that the independent refiners
will be able by this suit to maintain their
enterprises on a legitimate business basis.
SUFEEINTENDENT STARE ACQUITTED.
After being out for an unexpectedly
long time, under the circumstances the
jury in the trial of Superintendent Starr,
of the Port "Wayne Road, for criminal neg
ligence, for the loss of life at the Federal
street crossing last year, returned a verdict
of acquital. Hardly any other result was
to be expected in, view of the evidence and
the charge of the Jndge. The preponder
ance of the evidence was to the effect that
the Superintendent was not responsible for
the order which was supposed to have
caused the disaster; and the charge of the
Judge took the view that the order itself
contributed more to the safety of life than
to its peril. "With this showing the con
clusion was, not only that Superintendent
Starr was not the responsible person, but,
also that no one was criminally responsible
for the disaster. The unsatisfactory nature
of the latter conclusion doubtless protrac
ted the deliberations of the jury. The case
is left in a position where two lives have
been destroyed for the lack of necessary pre
caution, and no one is held responsible for
them. So long as this state of affairs con
tinues, it is certain that the disasters which
continually endanger the lives and property
of the public cannot be prevented.
EJiEE BREECHES AGAIN.
The gentlemen of fashionable proclivities
who have tried with small success to bring
knee breeches into use as evening dress,
must regard with envious eyes the Emperor
of Germany who, by twenty words from his
pen, has changed the court dress back to
the fashions of 1700. If there were more
suffering angels in swallow-tails in this
country it can hardly be doubted that the
republic would be in considerable danger.
They would conspire to put one of their
number upon the throne, that a despotic
disposition of the nation's wearing apparel
might be made. Happily the men whose
hearts are kept by their tailors are in the
The editor of the 2Tew York Herald has
shown a lively interest lately in the move
ment of favoring a revival of knee breeches.
He thinks that editorial as well as other
lees 'would look sweeter in the abbreviated
garments than they do now in wide
trousers. There is no reason why he should
not enjoy his heart's desire. He is fond of
Europe. "Why should he not move to Ger
many, where the Emperor has bidden bis
courtiers, and hence all society of the male
persuasion,to don the knee breeches? Such a
change might be of benefit to the readers of
the Herald, if the paper followed its editor.
The editorials, if printed in German, might
be much more highly appreciated by
English readers than they are now.
HTT.T. AND BALLOT EEFOEM.
Governor Hill's veto of the Saxton ballot
reform bill, which has just produced a long
message to the Legislature, receives the se
Tere criticisms of the Independent and Re
publican press in 2few York. Probably
the attacks on the Governor are well
fonnded to the extent that any measure
which tends to decrease the ability of ring
Bters to control the votes would be contrary
to the political interests of David Bennett
Hill. Bnt it is necessary to say that the
reasons whicti be gives in his message for
the veto of that measure have a good deal of
In addition to the practical impossibility
of the ordinary Toter selecting from a list of
fifty to one hundred and fifty names the
candidates for whom he wishes to vote, as
was pointed out in The Dispatch a few
days ago, the Governor shows particulars in
which the proposed measure would actually
restrict the liberty of the voter. For in
stance, the provision that the candi
dates must be reported to the pub
lic officials in order to have the
lists printed at the public expense, would
actually prevent the voter who wishes to
vote for some person not on the list of offi
cially announced candidates, from doing so.
The freedom of independent parties to bring
out new candidates at any time they choose
before election, is also very much hampered
bysuch a provision. GovernorHill approves
.. s.fi j-r "Ja i . - i. . ..
privacy of the voter in preparing his ballot,
each as the provision of private compart
ments where he is to do so without inter
ference from anyone. Bat he points ont
very forcibly that this can be secured
without loading; it down with the other
hampering restrictions of the Saxton Bill.
This may be a case of the political father
of lies, stealing the arguments of truth for
his own benefit; bat, nevertheless, there is
a great deal of troth in it. The privacy and
parity of the ballot can be secured in a good
many ways without importing an exotio
system designed for altogether different
elections than those which most be held in
NOT THE AMERICAN POLICY.
The report that the scheme proposed by
Mr. "William .Walter Phelps," of governing
Apia by a municipal council of which half
the membership shall be furnished by one
representative eaoh from Germany, England
and the United States, may be flattering to
the national pride, but it is not in accord
ance with the national policy. It violates
all our principles of non-intervention and
freedom from entangling alliances, by pro
posing to establish a protectorate over
Samoa and to enter into an alliance with
England and Germany for that purpose.
"What business have the United States,
England and Germany to set up a govern
ment for Samoa ? For them to do it united
ly is as wanton a violation of the rights of
a weak nation as it would be for Germany
to do it singly. If the purpose of the con
ference were to provide the Samoans
with a government, its utter disregard
of justice would appear from the
fact that the Samoans, the real
owners of the island, and the persons
most interested, are not represented or even
consulted. That is not consistent for a
nation which began its existence on the
principle of self-government and represen
tation. In dealing with a slightly civilized peo
ple, it is, of course, legitimate and praise
worthy for civilized powers to use their in
fluence and advice so as to secure stable and
enlightened government, Por the three
powers to confer so that their advice and
influence will not conflict is also legitimate;
but the American representatives, of all
others, should see to it that the confeience
stops there. "When it undertakes the "work
of setting up formsHif Government it leaves
the field of legitimate international work
and enters the province of usurpation.
If, as reported, Mr. Phelps has proposed
this plan, it will probably appear in time
that he has been deluded by Bismarck into
fathering the proposition that exaotly falls
in with the German schemes.
THE FOUR HUNDRED'S VOCATION.
Some of the notorious Four Hundred in
Kew York City seem to have shown consid
erable business talent in condncting the
Centennial festival. That is they have
made money out of the celebration for them
selves. The Entertainment Committee has
declined to make pnblic the accounts of the
ball and banquet, bnt it is known ' that the
committee's profit will certainly reach
$10,000 and may amount to $20,000. Their
claim for keeping the accounts secret is that
the guarantee fund for the banquet and ball
was not provided from the public Centen
nial subscriptions. But this has not been
at all clearly established.
It was the ball that made the profit for
Stuyve. Fish and his enterprising adjutors;
the ball which resulted in such disreputable
orgies. The banquet di? not pay. This
would seem to show that there is a line of
business for which the curled, darlings of
the Four Hundred are peculiarly fitted.
The Centennial ball has shown them where
they can make money. No donbt dis
reputable balls under aristocratic manage
ment will occur frequently next season in
New York. From high-kicking and champagne-swilling
to other and even, more
odorous pursuits the transition for these
bine bloods will be easy. The aristocrats
have generally been the most generous
patrons of vice in the large cities; now there
seems to be a fair chance of their becoming
the caterers to their vicious wants likewise.
The entire field of impropriety and dis
order will take on new charms under the
elegant management of those members of
the Four Hundred who do not go into the
The idea of Mr. "W. A. Royall, of Vir
ginia, that the Southern question is to be
settled by disfranchising the negro, indi
cates an ignorance of the fact that progress
never goes backward. The little matter of
amending the Constitution of the United
States does not frighten him; but he might
pause before the question of public faith in
volved in the oft-repeated assertions that the
South accepts the reconstruction amend
ments in good faith, and wishes sectional
issues laid aside.
To move on behalf of the South for a res
toration of disfranchisement on lines of
color would be giving the lie to the profes
sions of the South and reviving all the old
quarrels. Mr. Koyall wishes the South to
falsify its own professions and restore the
party issues of 1869. It fs safe to say
that the man who proposes that
course is incapable of appreciating
the fact that political issues move as much
as science and industry. There Is much
more promise of intelligence and progress
for the South in the assertion of the Peters
burg Index-Appeal, which says that "the
worst enemies of the Sooth are those restless
and misguided people who, in the face of
reason and experience, persist in agitating
a negro problem."
The proposition is all the more stupid be
cause the object at which it professes to aim
can be reached without the slightest con
flict either with the'U. S. Constitution or
public opinion. The object of increasing
the intelligence of the electorate is within
the grasp of every State. It can prescribe
such intellectual or educational qualifica
tions as it sees fit, so long as it applies
them to both races equally. A Southern
State which enacts that neither white nor
black shall vote who is unable to read will
not come into conflict with the United States
Constitution or aronse public feeling in
On the contrary, the Southern State that
makes the application impartial by permit
ting colored as well as white people who
pass the educational qualification to vote
freely, will not only eliminate the color line
from politics, but will set an example to its
if orthern neighbors.
Mr. Grant Allen, in a recent magazine
article, indulges in a large amount of
learned nonsense intended to prove that males
constitute therace, and that females are
only a part of the race, told off for pro
ductive necessities. The logic by which
this evidently preconceived conclusion is
reached is of the following remarkable sort,
Suppose a female child to be born of a
white father sad black mother. Sheinter
marries with another while and'the'result
Is a quadroon female. ogiprrng'.JtEepaat.the,
operation once more and we have an oc
toroon who can hardly be distinguished
from the white race. One more generation
with a white father and octoroon mother
and the ofispring is white. Here, Mr. Grant
Allen triumphaatly claims is a proof that
the qualities oi the father predominate.
The argument is amusing as an example
of the curiosities of logic. The predominance
of the qualities of four fathers of one race
against a single mother of the other, three
being the different grades of mixture, is
conclusive to the writer because his theory
is made up. Otherwise he might be able
to see that if it is true that "the male is the
race," 'the ofispring in the first case should
have been white, It does not occur to him
to imagine the case somewhat differently.
Suppose that the ofispring of the first cross
has been a male mulatto; that he marries a
negro woman, and that his male offspring
marries another negro woman, and so on.
"Will Mr. Grant Allen hold that the super
ior predominance of the males, will make
the sixteenth of white blood, triumph over
fifteen-sixteenths of negro -blood that
comes wholly from the female side?
This is what is called scientific deduc
tion. Its principal value is in demonstra
ting what nonsense can be perpetrated in
its name. Mr. Grant Allen's theory might
be accepted by the women with the remark
that it affords a satisfactory explanation of
the superabundance of fools.
The fact that only two noble lords; were
caught by the police in the raid on a London
gambling den, the other day, indicates an
abnormal condition of circumstances in the
London gambling dens. "We should judge
that the police did not hit the place where
the aristocracy most do congregate.
The report that the disease of the grape
vines in the French vineyards has been
cured by the importation of cuttings from
American vineyards states an interesting
international fact; bnt the French wine
crops are under greater obligation to Amer
ican vineyards that that. If fall credit
were given, it would probably be found that
the greatest half of the supply of French
wines comes "from American vineyards in
the first instance. Bat the American vine
yards that sell their wines that way are too
modest and retiring to make that claim
Calvin S. Bbice is now conceded to be
the favorite for the Democratie Chairman
ship. This simply holds good with the
statement of The Dispatch that the Dem
ocratic Chairman, like the Republican, will
be some fellow who can bring in the contri
butions of the millionaires.
As The Dispatch referred editorially
the other day to the story that the firm of
Harper & Brothers had kept a poem of
James "Whitcomb Riley's in its drawers for
eight years, it is only fair to say that the
report is denied by Harper & Brothers. The
Chicago JVetcj, which first gave publication
to the report, upon investigation finds it to
be unsupported by evidence. So far as
Harper & Brothers are concerned, their
reputation for fair dealing with writers re
The compromise verdict again puts on
the man who is acquitted, the costs for try
ing him on the charge of which he is de
clared not guilty. In this case the in
congruity is not lessened by the fact that
the man seems rather glad to pay the costs.
Fob the people who claim that going back
to the punishments of a past century and
using the whipping post will check crime,
the fact that one county in the little State
of Delaware, with a population half that of
Allegheny City, has to whip and pillory its
offenders in blocks of dozens, does not seem
to be very satisfactory. The reports of Del
aware's whippings only prove that Dela
ware is a century or two behind the age.
Feom the fine speeches that were made
by Consul General New and Consul General
"Waller at London, it appears that both the
incoming and the retiring officials are com
bined to bull the taffy market.
Goveenob TATton, of Tennessee, an
nounces that at the conclusion of his pres
ent term he' will retire from politics.
"Whether Governor Taylor's conscience
troubles him from the infliction of a large
amount of fiddling upon the voters, or
whether he intends to give bis exclusive at
tention in the future to torturing the cat
gut, requires further explanation.
The lordly ice man should ponder the
significance of the recent cold snap and re
flect upon the assertion that the meek most
generally inherit, or otherwise get hold
of, the whole earth.
The Chicago Socialists are discounting
alt the old jokes at their expehso by rising
in wrath at the order of a street car com
pany requiring its employes to wear clean
linen hereafter. The Socialists are boiling
over with wrath at the idea of forcing the
worKiaguiau iu wear any sucn oauge OI
servitude ss clean collars and cuffs.
THEDuquesne strike appears to be reach
ing an end that will make the strikers re
flect seriously on the old proverb of the
superiority of half a loaf to no bread.
The discovery that the representatives of
the American aristocracy made a profit of
ten or twenty thousand dollars out of the
disorderly Centennial ball, which was guar
anteed by a publie fund, is perhaps the best
refutation of Bishop Potter's claim that the
present generation is inferior in enterprise
and energy to its ancestors.
If a moderate proportion say about one
quarter of the rumors about local politics
are true, everybody has got his knife into
the back of everyone else.
The statement is now-going the rounds
that the American sugar beet is 33 per
cent richer in sugar than any foreign produc
tion. For this or some other reason the
Sugar Trust makes the American public
pay about twice 33J per cent more for its
sugar than the foreigners have to. This is
is the richest sugar beat.
DEATHS OP A DAT.
Wllllnm W. Hardlnr.
Philadelphia, May is. WiUlam W. Harding,
for many years the proprietor and publisher of
tbe Philadelphia Inquirer, died at his residence
this morning. Mr. Harding had suffered for the
past two years irom a complication of diseases,
and was seldom seen at hU office during that
period. He retired from active business life three
Mr. Harry Falrman, a son or Captain Charles M.
Falrman, of Mlncrsvillc, died yesterday at tbe
home of his parents from inflammation of the
bowels. Deceased was only 21 years of age, and a
young man of great promise,
Christopher btrahley, one of the best known
business men In the, .East XniL died i at his home
on Penn avenue yesterday. He was forthc last
ten years treasurer of J. B. Nicholson libdgeNo.k
,AJ13t A. V. Kf. ., fAUU1UiiUIMIltfVriVttttW.fi JVTWT
THE TOPICAL TALKER,
Mr. Goircn'sAb, Indeed The Slum of Warm
Political Wcntber Personalities and tbe
Lay of a Brass Band.
A LADY ot this city tells me a little story
which Illustrates pleasantly Mr, Frahklin B.
Gowen's courtesy, if it does nothing else.
Said my informant: "When I 'was a child I
was invited to Mr. Gowen's house to meet a lit
tle schoolmate from Netf York who had re
turned to visit her former home. In the coarse
of conversation the question was asked, what
relation was Mrs. Heilner to Mrs. VoorheesT
Mr. Gowen said: 'I understand that Mrs. Heil
ner Is Mrs. Voorhees' aunt'
"I replied earnestly: 'Oh, no, sir, they are sis
ters.' "He smiled sweetly and said: 'Ah, IndeedP
"Mr. Gowen had only lived in the place &
few years, so that I was not surprised at what I
supposed was his mistake. Tlje next day I said
mentally: 'I know that I am correct, but still I
will inquire as to the relationship.' 1 was told
that they were aunt and niece. To say that I
was crestfallen is to pot it quite mildly; and I
made up my mind there and then, first, to cor
rect my mistake the next time I saw Mr. Gow
en, and in the tutors not to be what a writer
says of Macaulay, so 'cock sure of everything.'
Mrs. Heilner and Mrs, Voorhees were both tall,
slender brunettes, nearly of an age, a great
deal together, and both their names had been
Slivers before they were married. I knew that
they were closely related, and took it for grant
ed they wore sisters. This lesson 1 have never
forgotten, and it has saved me chagrin and af
forded me amusement sometimes to see my op
ponents walk the plank."
When the sun was hottest yesterday, Colo
nel Tom Bayne stood in the doorway of the
Penny Frets office, and held an informal recep
tion there for nearly an hoar. The Colonel
looked well enoagh and seemed rather to enjoy
chatting wi ththefriendspoliti fcal andotherwise
who crowded about him. Politics, -with the
weather, seems to be getting warm in Alle
gheny county. Congressman Bayne has a beau
tiful house in "Washington, and a very quaint
and cozy summer residence in tb6 borough of
Bellevue. He has a charming wife and plenty
of money; but in all probability Colonel Bayne
will not enjoy these goodly possessions much
until next fall's election is over.
A MtNtJTE after leaving Colonel Bayne I met
another gentleman who is also somewhat Inter
ested in Allegheny politics for the time being,
to wit, Christopher Magee. In a sober suit of
black; Stalklnc along with his eyes looking into
the future, he didn't seem to .gee anyone, al
though I noticed several men bowed to him.
Mr. Magee's plans were, I believe, until
recently, shaped so as to allow him and a party
of select friends to visit the Paris Exposition
this summer. The Paris Exposition is Spoken
of as one of the most wonderful sights that the
world has ever seen. There were never steam
ships crossing the Atlantic faster or better
equipped than those which are now offering
accommodations at tbe lowest possible rates.
Mr. Magee may stick to his plans and go to
Paris; but it looks a little as if he would rather
stay here and count tbe tickets.
A hecipb ron long lite.
Oh! yon who are fit, and yoa who are forty,
So matter what happens, don't ran for the
lf Jesters remark yon are lazy or haughty,
Kepiyi "l believe in avoiding a strain."
Then Death will not hasten yonr going to fix
You'll catch the last ferryboat ever the Styx!
.Young Mr. Sbiras, the author of tbe White
impeachment motion, has excited a good deal
more attention since be returned from
Harnsbnrg than he ever did before in his life.
It is fair to say that his appearance is some
what of a disappointment to most people. He
does not look like a friend of the liquor men, a
dynamltard or an incendiary person; but is a
quiet, gentlemanly, somewhat clerical-looking
individual, who talks very modestly and does
not appear at all downcast on anjTaccount.
The idea that George Bhiras HI. was kilted a
few days asp is erroneous. He is alive and
well, and his memory is good.
THE LAT Or A BRASS BAXD.
The sentinels who silent stood
And caught tbe evening air.
And any other thing ther could.
That chanced to wander there,
Ashout heard in the neighborhood
That raised their level hair!
Before the shout had died away.
The soldiers heard again
A band of brazen music play
A martial march amain:
And then a fearful shout of "Quay
O'er Pittsburg comes to reign!"
The sentinels together clung.
So did their shaken knees;
And some away their muskets flung,
And hid among the trees. '
While one said he was very young
"1 pity the Magees!"
The warlike Andrews held the van;
He talked in cheertnl vein
About such things as chairmen can.
Ne'er to be heard again.
Then came a quiet gentleman,
They call him Colonel Ilayne.
But. oh! the flags and banners line,
The torches and bassoons;
Some fifty fifcrs In a line.
And drummers In platoons.
May fourteen, eighteen eighty-nine
Will lire for many moons!
The chronicler has yet to tell
How fared the brazen bind
In its attempt to sound the knell
Throughout the blooming land
JJtC. L. M-and here 'tis well
To let the legend stand.
Bnt thoueh with drums and horrid din
You may scare little boys:
To eonqnemen, pray don't begin
The fight, M. Q., with noise.
PEOPLE OP PfiOMINEME.
Robert C. Wiktheop has just entered
upon the 81st year of his age.
T. Maxzia Hebmanu. of Oregon, has been.
appointed chief of division in the Pension
Fletcher Johnston, of Kentucky, chief
of the division of accounts In the general land
office, has resigned.
A Missouiu man recently gained an audience
with Secretary Tracy by sending in a card in
scribed: "J. M. Thompson, of Missouri, who
does not want an office."
AMONG tbe President's callers yesterday
were Senators Harris, Washburn and Hawley;
Representatives Niedringhaus, Cbeadle. Pnsey
and Ewart and ex-Representative Thomas
Secretaries Blaine and Tracy, with a
number of officers of the State Department,
left Washington yesterday morning for Gen
eral Agnus' country home, Nacirema, near
Chief Justicb Fvtlleb, of the United
Btates Supreme Court, left Washington yester
day afternoon forNorfolk, Va., and from there
will go to South Carolina on his district tour.
The Associate Justlces'liave not yet announced
when they intend starting on their summer dis
trict tours, but will probably do so soon.
Hon. Samuel J. Randall, who has been
confined to his house in Wasnington for sev
eral weeks, is convalescingxapldly.and expects
to be out shortly. His appetite is good, and a
gentlemen who saw .him yesterday says be
looks as well as at any time during the last
session of Congress. Mr. Randall nill proba
bly spend tbe summer at tbe seashore.
Secbktaby Pboctob has returned to Wash
ington from his Western trip looking refreshed
and in good health. He is satisfled with tbe
results of his observations, although from the
hasty manner in which the trip was made the
examinations were necessarily cursory. One
post and sometimes two were visited each day,
and the trip extended as far West as Denver.
In a few days Secretary Proctor will visit West
Point, N. Y. He says that tbe subject of issu
ing a proclamation of amnesty to deserters has
not been discussed or eonsiderod bythePres-l
Ida and httnaall
How Russell Is Kept Busy.
from the Chicago Times.:
First it was the red ants and now it is rats
that are overrunning tbe White House. Half
a day in tho week is now set aside for a grand
rat-killing match on the east side of tbe White
House. The silence about the movements of
Russ Harrison Is explained: He is the rat
killer of the mansion.
. Kover. Never, No More. i"
irom the Philadelphia Press.! " "- .
M7H gajU.Uneywgrista.wtth the UmSm,
t . -. , . . . -ri -. w- nr itfi J . .u.
THXTRSDAT, MAY 16,
ATIUCKI MAID'S SAD PATE,
A Spanish Amazon With a Romantic His
tory DylngvAtnona; Strangers.
Kansas Cray, May 15,-Taere lies in the
Oklahoma Wild West camp at the Exposition
a very sick woman, who has a strange history.
She is a handsome and daring little Spanish
woman, lithe of lorm, regular of feature, with
flashing, jet black eyes, dark hair and bright,
plump cheeks. She has the charm of youth,
being only J3 years old, and is a dashing rider,
a skillful wielder of the lasso Lndadead sure
shot with pistol or gun. Yesterday afternoon
this little woman, whose real name is Socle Es
pinosta, but who is dawn on the programme as
Miss Malo, rode a backing pony in the pro
cession and the performance at the park. At
the close of her act she complained that she
had been hurt internally by the slanging of
her horse and took to her bed. She was soon
In such agony that Dr. Ford was sent for. He
prescnoea meaicine to ease her of her pain.
When the effect of the drug bid worn off she
commenced crying and moaning attain from
pain. To-day she is much worsi), and the camp
is in gloom, for they fear that she is dying.
Miss Eplnosta is of pure Spanish blood and
an aristocrat in the WildTWest camp, feeling
herself far above the ordinary Mexican women
of the troupe. Four years ago her lover was
killed while engaged in smuggling horses at
Laredo, and she was herself shot through the
shoulder in a melee which resulted. Two years
later, at a Ban Antonio dance house,, her
brother was killed. She was told of it, and
rushing into the midst of the crowd she shot
three men who had been concerned in the kill
ing. She received at that time a second bad
wound. Dr. Ford is of the opinion that tbe
effect of tbe change of climate and tbe bard
work of outdoor show life on these old wounds
have more to do with her severe illness than
any injuries she received from tho bucking of
her pony yesterday.
A HAYSEED MADE HAPPY.
Sir. Squash, of New Jersey, Has a Talk With
From the Philadelphia North American. 1
Mr. Hayseed Squash, of Sqcashville, N. J.,
was coming down Market street yesterday
afternoon, when he mot one of the men who
run John Wanamakers wagons. Mr. Squash
looked at tbe man from head to toe, and finally
his eye rested for a while on the cap the man
wore, on which was inscribed "John Wana
maker." "Be you tbe Postmaster General?" inquired
The driver took in the situation at a glance
and he answered gravely.
"Ye sir. What can I do for youf"
"I don't want nothln' for myself. But my
brother Jim wonld like to get a place at Wash
ington. I think he might get a job as Senator
or Congressman, or some slcb business. He
ain't proud. He'll take anything. Mebbe you
could get him some place. He's a mighty
powerful speaker and he might help yoa some-
The driver responded earnestly.
"Your brother shall have Matt Quay's snap.
Send him to me." '
"And Mr. Hayseed Squash, of Squashvllle,
N. J., went away entirely satisfied with his in
terview with the Postmaster General.
A CHICAGO BELLE'S SCHEME.
She Will Help tbe PoorbylntroduclngThem
Into Swell Society.
Chicago, May 15. Miss Jaae Adams, a
wealthy young lady, has her own ideas of
philanthropy, and is of the opinion that the
true way to be philanthropic is to assist in rais
ing the social status of the poorer classes. In
order to carry out her Idea she has rented the
handsome residence of the lat millionaire,
J. O. Hull, at the corner ot Polk and Halsted
streets, and proposes to entertain largely. She
will not only Invite her swell friends of Chi.
cago's good BQCiety.but ahe will have the Poles,
Bohemians, Germans and othbr nationalities
who reside in the neighborhood. The district
is not exactly a "tough" one, bnt is peopled by
the lower classes of foreigners, with whom
cleanliness is not a virtue.
Miss Adams doesn't propose to play the part
of the Lady Bountiful, but means to do what
she can toward the elevation socially of the
people among whom she is shortly to take up
her residence. Her friends are awaiting the
outcome of her experiment with interest, but
confidently predict She- will weary of her new
friends. Miss Adams has but recently re
turned from a three years' sojourn In Europe.
A EEMARKABM CEOISEE,
England Falls to 8ecure a,Wonderinl War
ship Built forltnly.
WASrrrNOTOK, May 15. With some interest,
naval architects in Washington are waiting
further particulars of the performance of a
remarkable cruiser built in England by the
Armstrongs. She is named the Plemonte, and
said to have made 19 knots under natural
draft, and aver 21 knots with! dreed draft. Tbe
vessel measures 2,500 tons and carries engines
of 11,500 horse power nearly treble the propor
tionate horse power of the new gunboat York
town. From the information received at the Navy
Department it appears that tne nun 01 the
Bible construction, verging closely on weakness,
is indicated. Elements of safety and con
venience, such as complete double bottoms and
handy coal bunkers, have been sacrificed for
the sake of lightness in tbe new vessel, which
accounts in a large measure for the wonderful
speed said to be attained. Nevertheless, al
though the ship was built for the Italian Gov
ernment, the British naval authorities made
strenuous but unsuccessful efforts to purchase
her from the builders.
MUST BE DONE ECONOMICALLY.
Establishing a Refuge Station In Bearing;
Strnit on Little Money.
Washiuotoh, May 15. Secretary Windom
has directed Captain Healy, commanding tbe
revenue steamer Bear, at San Francisco, to
purchase the necessary lumber, provisions and
fuel for the construction and fitting ont of a
refuge station at Point Barrow, in Bearing
Straits, He has also appointed Captain Gil
bert H. Borden, of New Bedford, superintend
ent of the station, and authorized him to em
ploy two assistants. Tbe men, material and
supplies will be transported to Point Barrow by
tbe steamer Bear, which will probably sail
from San Francisco on that mission about the
first of June. She will proceed first to Ouna
laska, where she will be joined by tbe United
States steamship Thetis, The commanding
officers of the two vessels will then consult as
to their subsequent movements.
The money available for the establishment ot
the refuge station, 515,000, Is regarded at the
Treasury Department as sufficient only for the
erection of a small houce. with supplies for one
j ear's maintenance ot 100 men.
NOT MAKING 80 MUCH MONET.
The Baltimore nnd Ofilo's Receipts Falling
Off the Present Year.
Baltimobe, May 15. The monthly meeting
of tbe directors of the Baltimore and Ohio
Railroad Company was held here to-day. J.
T. O'Dell was appointed general manager of
the entire system, and W. W. Peabody was ap
pointed general superintendent of the lines
West of the Ohio river, with the same duties
and powers as he has heretofore exercised as
general manager. He was also appointed gen
eral agent of the Baltimore and Ohio at Chl-
T he statement of the earnings and expenses
for last month show a falling off in the earnings
of 934, tS9 on the lines east of the Obio river, an
increase of $9 372 bn those west thereof, and a
net decrease in tho earnings on the entire sys
tem for this month nf $25,117. For the seven
months of tbe present fiscal yeir, there Is aj
falling on in mo net earnings on mo enure sys
tem ot giiAt,03.). xue report oi me committee
-which has been investigating tfie affairs of the
report of tbe committee J
road lor nearly a year past was aaopieu.
No Necessity for Worry.
From the New York Herald.l
While we are well informed of the ultimate
fate of a city built on a rock, like New York,
and one built on tbe sand, like Chicago, we are
unhappily left in tho dark concerning one
founded on gas, like Pittsburg.
A Monument for General Lognn.
SFBINOV1ELD, III., May 15. The House to
day passed the bill appropriating $30,000 for a
monument to tbe late General John A. Logan.
THE PITTSBURG STAGE.
LeAvttt'b Lily City Company at Harry
Williams' next week.
The next attraction at Harris' will be Gray
and Stephens in a repertoire opening withTho
Old Oaken Bucket."
Docstadters1 minstrels, one of the most
noted troupes of tho kind, wilt be at the Opera
House next week. There axo many old favor
itesin the company. '
Rice's melodloug-aadbcantltul burlesque,
"Evangeline." wHl 'be -presented 'at the'Grand
Opera House to-nlghtandfor thebalancejbf
hU waAlLThUnrnrliu-tlaa will 2tui oIvais wlM
ithU. wsekAThisproaactJon vm,tw i(tm with?
.::. 3 i-.. -- . ,. -- .-r Mmm
- The Necessity far a Park.
'To the Editor of The Dispatch!
Let all petty grievances' he pat aside as to
who thought first of such a thing as a park for
Pittsburg, We can bat coincide with them all
and say we must hare a park. The trouble
heretofore with Pittsburg baa been its conserv
atism, ruinous in many instances to her inter
ests; yet at the same time beneficial. We mast
all take into consideration that this popular de
mand for a park arises principally from two
causes. First, the overcrowding of oar pres
ent city; and secondly, from the different peo
ple who have come among us. The new ele
ment in oar business has driven out tho old
pensioners on onr generous citizens and placed
wide awake young men in their stead, who are
alert to their own and the city's interest, and
with them comes a desire to breathe a little of
uoa's iresn air at least once a week.
These same strangers are making our build
ings six. and eight stories in height, tearing
down old eyesores and introducing metropoli
tan ideas and order. Population Is growing,
faster than building accommodations, and,
as a result, Cheap structures are
erected, where men can sleep at
night and then hurry thence to their work.
Yes, work six days and worry on the seventh,
for there is no place to go. Fifth avenue,
Smithfleld ana Wood streets can't hold every
body, and everybody cannot sit down. "Oh,
yes,'' lots ot the people will say; "why, we have
always managed to get along." Yes, dear
friends, but then you had only five persons to a
square yard on Fifth avenue. Now we have S3
The people are moving, and some good leaven
has been interspersedin the mass, but what we
want is concertea action on tne pan 01 tne
citizens. Let as have a commission appointed
to find out what the parks will cost, and then
let a proposition be submitted to the people
direct, and wo venture to say that it will be
voted a success, direct tax or not. Secondary
to all this Is the feeling Of pride when strangers
refer to our city as a workshOD, overdriven
and without a park. It will be worth more to
the interests of Pittsburg than simply as a
sanitary measure. It is a good ad. All that
is wanted now is action. PHI Kaf.
PrrrsBBBO, May 15.
U. S. If nvy Yards.
To tbe Editor of The Dispatch)
How many navy yards are there in the United
States, and where are they? A. A.
Bbasdock, May 15.
There are seven of them. They are located
as follows: Brooklyn N. Y,; Charlestown
Navy Yard, Boston, Mass.; Gosport Navy
Yard, near Norfolk. Va.;Klttery Navy Yard,
opposite Portsmouth, N. H,; League Island
Navy Yard, seven miles below Philadelphia!
Mare Island Navy Yard, near San Francisco:
New London naval station. New London,
Conn,; Pensacola, Fla.; Washington, D, 0.1
Great Ocean Steamers.
To tbe Editor ofThe Dispatch:
Please give tbe dimensions and tonnage of
the largest steamships that ply between New
York and Liverpool. Also tbe tonnage of the
celebrated Great Eastern. Bjcadeb.
Butlee, May 15,
(1) City of New York, 10,500 tons, 580 feet
long; Etruria and TJmbria, each 7,718 tons and
601 feet long. (2) The Great Eastern could
carry 5.0OT tons of merchandise and 15,000 tons
of coal. She was almost 700 feet long.
They Did-What of Itt
To the Editor or The DIspatcni
Will yoa please answer the following ques
tion: Did the "Bostonlans" Opera Company
play In Pittsburg during the season of 1SS3-S9?
McEjsesfobt, May lo. Cubley.
A CLERGYMAN DEINES BEES
And is Suspended From His Pastorate by a
PEMBDf A, N. DAE., May 15. Rev. Charles
McLean, of this place, who has been suspended
from his pastorate by the Presbytery at Grand
Torks, has had his trouble brought on him by
taking a glass of beer in a saloon. Mr. Mc
Lean's defense was that he had taken the beer
on the advice of his physician, and he thought
that it was better to take It openly than to
sneak home with it. pull down the curtains and
drink It In the dark. The reverend gentleman
has always been strongly la favor of high
license as against local option ana promoiuon,
and he had quite a controversy last fall,
through the local newspapers, with several
other ministers on this question.
Pastor McLean stands about 6 feet i inches
in height, weighs about 200 pounds, and has a
pair of hands and arms that a champion athlete
might be prond of. He is well liked by the
majority of his congregation, who support him
In his present trial. It is only the hot prohibi
tion element that is against him.
SOME INTERESTING FIGURES,
Showing Uncle Sam's Probablo Expenses
nnd Receipts for the Year.
Washington, May 15, Statements showing
the results of the aots of the second session of
tbe Fiftieth Congress upon the finances of the
Government have been prepared by Thomas
P. Cleaves and James C. Courts, clerks, re
spectively, of the Senate and House Commit
tees on Appropriations. They show that the
total amount appropriated by Congress was
$286,018,460, while the permament specific and
indefinite appropriations were estimated by
the Secretary of the Treasury at 8108,631,05(1,
making the total estimated expenditures of
the Government for 1839-90, $395,837,616. The
estimated revenues for the same time are f439,
609,658, The acts provide for 350 new offices, the
salaries of which aggregate 3,800, while the
increase of salaries ot old offices amounts to
S1,025,S80. Sixty-nine offices are abolished, the
salaries of which are $127,972, and salaries of
other offices are reduced 57,200.
A SUCCESSFUL MATRIMONIAL UNION.
A Society of Young Ladles Who Vowed
They Would All Get Married.
New Haven, May 15. The elopement of
two young people ot the western part ot the
city brings to light the existence of a queer or
ganlzatlon. Miss Lizile Fletcher, tbe daughter
of a prominent purveyor, on Fast Day eloped
with Carl Treitlein, an intelligent and good
looking German, and journeyed to Port Ches
ter, N.Y., where they were married. Miss
Fletcher is the member of a society called the
i When organized It consisted of 12 young
ladles. Six ot the 12 are now married, and four
of tbe six eloped. The girls are very close
mouthed, but their companions say that when
the "Secret Onion" was formed each girl made
a vow to get married within a year.
ONE CHINAMAN MAI EETUEN.
Secretary Ticlienor Grants a Favor to a
LadVs Celestial Papll.
Washington, May 15. Application was re
cently made to the Secretary of State for au
thority for the return to the United States of a
Chinaman named Darton Bong, now in Hong
Hong, who was formerly a pupil of Mrs. Mary
A. St.ott, in a mission school In Baltimore.
The matter w as referred to the Treasury De
partment, and Assistant becretary Ticbenor has
informed the applicant that tbe Chinaman in
question will be allowed to return to tbis coun
try, provided be is not a laborer wltbln the
meaning of the Chinese exclusion ace, and pro
vided also that he can satisfy tbe customs offi
cers at the port of arrival of his social position.
The Governor Signs a BUI.
Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
Harrisburq, May 15. Governor Beaver
signed but one bill to-day, that of Rcpresenta-
tive McDonald, of Lackawanna county, to ena
ble boroughs to adont anu construct sewage
syitems and to assess and collect tbe cost
Will They Trnst fo Board?
From tho Boston Globe.''
The hotel men are holding tftalr annual con
vention in Chicago. A hotel trcVt is not among
tbe Improbabilities of the futur
Blossom, little stats, and fill
The eardens of the skv:
Drops of wine that you distil
Upon (he grasses lie.
Every thirsty blado holds up
A blessing to tbe blue,
Every green spear fills its cup
With heaven's cooling dew.
Blossotn. little stars of love,
In my beloved's heart:
Blossom Wee the stars above,
And study well that chart.
For beneath you there Is one
Who dares a cup to raise;
He has thirsted in the sou
These many dreary days.
,jmosoi, ui0mi sugo, "4 U..MO -
, 'V3:Lov's glasses and the wine" 5
I heart a(mi
M ETEOPOLITAK MELAKGB.
Harried Nine Months and Want to Die.
!NXW YOBS BUBXAU STXCIALs,
NEW Yobk, May 15. Mrs, Kate Leeb, a
young married woman who lives near the Long
Island Railway, in Brooklyn, ran away from
her breakfast table this morning, jumped over
tbe back yard fence, and threw herself across
the railway track before an approaching train.
Her husband, who had followed her, dragged
her from the rails after a sharp tussle, which
almost resulted in the death of both. Mm.
Leeh has been married nine months. She
quarreled with her husband and then wanted
Lots of Bis Ones Sailing Away.
The outgoing trans-Atlantic steamships car
ried away many famous persons to-day, Robert
T. Lincoln, United States Minister to England,
Mrs. Lincoln, Miss Jessie Lincoln and Master
Abraham Lincoln occupied two stats rooms on
the City of Pans. Among their 500 fellow pas
sengers were Mrs, Frank Leslie, General Lloyd
Bryce, Captain B. L. Zalimki, inventor of the
dynamite gun; Anson Phelps Stokes, Hon. G.
M. Pullman, Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Carnegie,
and Miss Sallle Hargons, the belief of the last
New York season. On the steamship Western-
land, for Antwerp, were Belva Lockwoodand
the Rev. Anardo Deyo, of Oxford, who will at
tend the Universal Peace Convention In Parts,
and the Hon. Julius Goldsehmidt, United
States Consul General to Austria, Allen
Thorndike Rice, Minister to Russia, who was
to havo sailed for his post of duty to-day, was
taken HI at the last moment and had to delay
Sned by a Priest for Slander.
Father Francis Dent, once a most prominent
member of the Franciscan Order of Roman"
Catholic Priests, has again stirred up Roman
Catholics in the region by suing Vicar General
Keegan and Bishop Ryan, of BufWo, for
slander. In each snlt he asks the Supreme
Court to give him $25,000 damages. Father
Dent says that the Vicar General has spoken of
him repeatedly as a libertine and as an untried
criminal who ought to be behind the bars.
Bishop Ryan Is charged with accusing Father
Dent of impropor intimacy with Maira T.
Henchey. Hannah Beck and Nora Mabon. For
a number of years Father Dent was a professor
of theology in the College of tbe Franciscan
Fathers, at Allegany, Cattaraugus county, N.
Y. He was noted tor his eloquence, and as
an instructor and orator was considered first
among the Franciscan monks. He figured in a
libel suit some time ago against Charles T.
Persons, publisher ot a paper in Cattaraugus
county, which charged Father Dent with the
abduction of a 14-year-old girl named Rose Aun
iaiianan. Father Dent Is his own attorney in
the slander suits which he has just brought.
Gladstone Thinks He's Growing Old,
A New York newspaper syndicate recently
offered William E. Gladstone $25,000 for 25 let
ters on current topics. Mr. Gladstone, ia bis
refusal, says: "At my age the stock of brala
power does not wax, but wales, and the publlo
calls upon my time leave me only a fluctuating
residue to dispose or. All Idea of a Series of
efforts Is, therefore, I have finally decided,
wholly beyond my power to embrace."
Doesn't Look Exactly Like Suicide.
The body of Louis E. Robellaz, 22 years old.
rose to the surface of the Harlem river near
High Bridge this morning. The right hand of
the dead man still clutched an umbrella. A
piece of iron weighing about 25 pounds was
strapped to the left leg. Robellaz was a pros
perous salesman. 'He was last seen alive three
weeks ago, by his fiancee. The police are In
vestigating. Wonld LIko to Have a Settlement.
The United States Circuit Court to-day
granted an order for an accounting of profits
derived by John R. Anderson, publisher, and
Horatio Alger, author, from the sale of the
book "From Canal Boy to President." Laura
E. Gilmore claims that Mr. Alger got all the
materials for his biography ot Garfield from
'Edmund Klrke'sUfe of James A. Garfield."
As the assignee of the copyright of Edmund
Eirke, whose real name was James R. Gilmore.
Miss Gilmore wishes to collect damages for in
fringement from Mr. Alger and his publisher.
L0T3 OP MONEY IN SNAKES.
Coinectlont Partners Getting Uleh by Kill,
lag Battlers for Their Skins.
New Haven, May 15. Del Reeves, a Bristol
farmer, has killed eight large rattlesnakes this
month with his shotgun. Near bis house are
several dens in the rocks, where the reptiles
resort in winter and sport themselves In the
sun in the summer. The hunter has to shoot
quiokly to get them before tbe rattlers get into
the rocks. The oil of the rattlesnake is good
for external use, and is saved unless the reptile
has bitten itself while in pain, in which case It
is not taken. The oil brings 25 cents per ounce,
and a fat snake will sometimes yield more than
Since the bounty on rattlesnakes' rattles was
declared off, it is said, these dangerons reptiles
are increasing in tho backwoods ledges. Reeves
has been shooting them for years. The sides
of his barn are frequently adorned with snake
Skins and rattles. Good rattler skins sell for $2
apiece in New York, where they are made into
pocketbooks, ladies' belts and slippers, while
the rattles will bring SI
a string. They are
mounted in jewelry.
A COMPETITION NOT DESIBBD.
Mayor Filler's Insurance Bill Fought by tho
Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
Habbisbubo, May 15. A large delegation
of representatives of fire insurance companies
from Philadelphia and Pittsburg were given a
hearing before the Governor on the bill amend
ing the act ot 167S relative to Insurance com
panies, authorizing Insurance companies, or as
sociations commonly known as factory mutual
insurance companies conducted on the mutual
plan, to transact business In this State.
The insurance men asked the Governor to
witbnold bis signature from the bill, as its ap
proval would result in treat lniustice to the
companies they represented, from the fact that
they were obliged to pay a tax, while the fac
measure is known as Mayor Filler's bill.
Governor took no action on the act.
tory companies wouia escape taxation.
Made Speechless by Fright.
Philadelphia, May 16. The power of
speeoh has but just returned to Mrs. C. H.
Nier, of No. 1303 Passayunk avenue, after she
had lost the use ot her voice for several days.
Mrs. Nier was so frightened at the great wind
storm which swept over the city on Friday
last that she was struck dumb. She possessed
all her other faculties, but the vocal cords were
paralyzed, and not nntil Monday evening could
she make an articulate sound, and then only in
Feel Dizzy, Governor?
From tne Jfew Tork World.!
Governor Hill seems to be walking around in
a small circle. The natural tendency of this
sort of locomotion is to make the circle smaller
As Erie girl named Bear has married a man
named Bacon. '
Miss Julia Hill, ot Franklin, discovered a
minnow two inches long in a plate of restau
rant Ice cream.
A max named Heffner, who died recently at
Allentown. was the father of 41 children, 2S of
whom survive. He was married three times.
A Fbankion county man backed up against
a circular-saw. Tbe seat of his new $7 pants was
removed in a jiffy, bnt the man escaped with
out a scratch.
J. Shan Marqerum, of Washington, has a
road cart which was once owned by Ephriam
Blaine, the father of James G. Blaine. It is
still in good condition.
A Bradford man found a nest and five
young mice in his last season's straw hat when
he removed it from the closet on a recent warm
day. Ho concluded to get a new hat.
Mns. Jacob Ruch, of Newton, went into her
kitchen one evening without a light. While she
was about to take something from the table a
rat bit her hand and nearly scared her into fits.
There Is a net coon In a Washington. (Pa.)
hotel which exhibits a strange fondness for
cats. Every time he gets hold of one he
squeezes it until it howls, aud seems to enjoy
the sport greatly. He was never known to
Ex-District Attorney Harkt S. Mub
fitt, of Doylestown, lives In a house is Upper
MakeSeJd township, Backs county, la which
Hoar a vWaahtssrSea easda fah .hsadaaaHnw
iwfcfle the naMat arssr.w ereeetaCLtMlBeia-
, - j- i - . .
A company of Chinamen styled tha
Imperial Cnlnese Dramatic Company of Ban
Francisco Is playing At a Chicago theater.- Tha
play produced Is said to be 3,000 years old.
-H. T. Hnfiv.whlle ontting downabe
tree ou his farm, five miles from Atlanta, dis
covered m the hollow trunk elsht army mus
kets and two bayonets. Soldiers stored them
there 25 years ago.
In trying to eat"ten pounds of roast beef
on a wager the other day, George Lane, a rest
dent of Rutland, overestimated bis capacity
and fell over In a fit and died. Ho thought ha
was a hog, but he wasn't.
A Lapeer (Mich.) man froze one of his
hands one day recently while the thermometer
stood at 95 Irr tbe shade. He was running an
ice cream freezer, and his hand was so badly
frosted that he had to wear it in a bandage for
Ben Davis, of ElkPupIds, Michayi
Mike Gay buried some maple sjrup.lathe
spring of '79, and has just due It up to find it as
fresh and sweet as ever. Ben didn't know
where the stuff was burled, which isonerea.
son it kept so well.
A couple who had been divorced 40
years before In California, met on a railroad
train out in Arkansas the other day. They
ieuuKuueueacnomer, ana. alter a short talk,
concluded to remarry, and the ceremony was
performed on their reaching Eureka Springs.
Arlt, that evening. .
Hugh .Foster, an intelligent Michigan
Scotchman, who lives on Sugar Island in tha
St, Mary's river, has never seen a locomotive,
and has so little curiosity on the subject that
he has never taken the trouble to walk a mila
to see one, although be is frequently at the
Soo, where the mile's walk would bring him.
An estate ol 876,000,000 has reverted to
tbe Holland crown because of a missinir. heir.
The "rightful heirs are said to be two little girls
in Toccoa, Gawho are related on their father's
side to ex-Governor Fenton. of New York-, e-r.
4'resldent Grover Cleveland. Governor HilL
Mr. Fargo, of Wells. Fargo & Co., Chicago,
ana on their mother's side to Jeff Davis.
Tha 12-year-old son of Thomas With
row, of Allegan, Mich., is a fisherman of the
fl rst water. Last week ho captured a 90-pound
sturgeon with a 25-cent frog spear. The fish
pulled the doughty fisherman Into the water
and took turns In baing-Ou top, but the boy
proved the better man of tne two and finally
reached shore with his prize, which he took
borne In a wheelbarrow.
Dakota people are a queer lot, A mem-
uer oi tne legislature in tnat Territory was
told by a number ot hfspolltical opponents that
he was crazy, and be concluded that maybe he
had better look the matter up. He wanted to
be reasonable about It ana find ont authorita
tively, so be went downtn New York and sub
mitted his case to an expert. The doctor put
him through his mental paces, talked with him
a lon time, and studied him. Then he gave
tbe Dakota man a certificate of sanity.
A few days ago a youth entered the
store of F. P. Kelly, Ruffsdale, Pa to attend
to some business. He bad with him a turkey,
tied by the legs. Pending his business trans,
actions, the youth deposited the fowl on the
floor. Shortly afterward a dog rushed into tbe
store. Tbis frightened the turkey. Immedi
ately tha bird was all commotion. It fluttered
among the queensware until It had broken $3
worth, and then smashed a plate glass window.
The store keeper wants damages, but he hastn't
decided whether he ought to sue the boy, the
turkey or the dog.
Assemblyman MoAdam, of Oneida
county, received a monkey at the Capitol at
Albany by express one night recently. The
monkey was pat in the lobby outside the As
sembly chamber, but it squeaked so that It
could oe heard inside. Mr.Mase went out and
kicked the box, which made the monkey howl
more. A committee ot the Assemblymen took
charge of it and escorted it into the library,
where it was fed on crackers. The Assembly
men tried to catch it and Tint it hack In its hn-r
but it climbed around over the bookcases, and
It was so much more Interesting than tbe pro
ceedings of the Assembly that fora while there
were naraiy enougn men in tne Mouse to pa
bills. Mr. McAdim finally nut It l.rt In I
box after another Assemblyman bad knocke
is on me Dooxcase witn a broom.
Gathering fruit can scarcely be ca'
trapping, and yet there is a stratag
iriDutea to tnat "walking bunch of too'
called the hedgehog which may pro
a place In that category. Is seems th f
frequently found in the hedgehog's T
apartment, and its presence there Is e. -a
in this remarkable way: It is known that hedge- "
hogs often climb walls and run off upon low A
bongos, and, instead of scrambling down In tbe
same manner, they boldly make the leap from
the top to the ground, sometimes 10 or 13 feet.
They coll into a ball in the air, strike upon
their armor of spines, and bound away un
harmed. In taking this jump they have been
seen to strike upon fallen fruit, which, thus
impaled npon their spines, was carried away
by tbem, and tnls has given rise to the opinion
that in some such way they may have stored
their winter homes.
About four miles south of Interlachen,
Putnam county, Fla., some of the citizens were
startled by a frightful noise, like the rushing
of a mighty cannon ball through the air. On
looking up they discovered something that
looked like a solid column of fire passing with -tremendous
velocity through the air, with a
whirring; hissing sound, something like that of
a shell, but many times louder. It appeared to
be from 8 to 10 feet in length and from 4 to S
feet in diameter, but it was passing with such
swiftness that It may have been many times
larger than it appeared. When first discovered
It seemed to be several hundred feet above the
earth, and was inclining in its course toward
the ground, profusely emitting great sparks of
fire. About a minute or two after It passed
out of sight an awful explosion was heard that
shook -the earth for miles around, and was
neara ior a distance ax 10 miles.
Logwood, tbe sap or juice of which i
extracted Very largely for purposes of dyeing
in different colors, grows in swampy places on
low lands in the West Indies. The trees are
somewhat shaped like elm trees, with large
branches, bat these are more tortuous and
kinky, much more clumsy-looking. In fact. The
leaves of the foliage do not grow with any
luxuriance, but are dwarfed and grow close to
the limb- they are slimmer and longer. The
natives. In securing tbe wood, cot down the
trees with huge, heavy-headed axes, Ilka
beetles, and cut off the bark and sap wood with
theso and with machetes, long Scimetax or cut-lass-like
knives. The heavy heads of the axes
assist them In breaking off the limbs when
nearlv severed, and they proceed tocntthese
Into convenient lengths. The heart 'wood,
which is red (the sap wood Is yellow). Is used
for dyeing, and is filled up and carted down to
tbe shore or quay, where It Is piled up by the
natives for shipment.
FOLLY AS IT FLIES.
"lis sweet to court, but oh! how sad
To strike a snag In the shape of dad.
Jfornln g Journal,
Teacher (to pupil) Johnnie, what li i
Johnnie A demagogue is a vessel that holds
wlnoj gin, whisky or any other liquor. Xkrro
tree Prett. '
Best Time to See Him. Guide (to Amer i
lean tourist, in Venice Yoa will want to see the
Hon of St, Mark, of course, sir
Tourist ies, I s'pos so. About what time do
they feed bim?-ffe.
TRLTIHISG THE LAW2T.
One of the worst of nuisances ia
The chap who's up at early dawn
Vaklng the lawn-mower zlzlzlzlz,
Basplng tne whiskers oil the lawn!
Delicate Satire. Husband I shan't be
home to dinner to-day: you need not wait for me.
I'm going shooting at Snake Hill.
WUe-Bnakellin? I think you are Just aboat
marksman enough to bit something of that size I
A Blush Absorber. Housewife Your 4
impudence amazes me. 1 lnftr, by your nose,
Tnmth-ih. Tnidun. von do me agreatwrong.
I do not drlsk. My nose 1b simply blush ab-.
sorter. ottnK rrtt nor.
"Rather Amhiffnons. Harrv Had a great
m. i.t rM.ht nMTnf.nl Took a iuI out to ride
with the new mare, you know, and my arms are
lame to-day from trying to hold her In! 4
wm-Theglrlr ,, - .
Harry No; tbe mare, Jioitan Herald. ' ,
Not a Mao of His Word. "W-w-will
yoa b-b-be m-mlne, Miss Laur? C-can't yo
trustmeth-througbl-Ufe, my angel?" asked tha
stuttering young man. -S
.iam afraid not, Mr. Jenkyns,'Vreplied the .
object or his devotion. "1 am a little, afraldjtou
trust you. You bavs broken your word aihair
daen times In the last two minutes." Terrs
MauttSxprut. . -4e-
Phyllis, love may be foyoH,
Bnt it Is not for me:
For fortune comes between ustwoVt
, Ana says it muscnoi oc.
Another fellow's fortune, I
kBtlUIon. as I know:
lYew ask me how I Utaad Itojtty
i" I ssIsCTS