The Pen and Pencil. ‘Do yon ever print any art items in your paper? asked a rather seedy toaking wan, with long hair, a slouch hat and paint on his fingers, edging tuto the San Francisco Post's inner sanetun: the other day. ‘Because, continned the young man scowling critically at a cheap chromo on the wall, ‘because I thought if you cared to report the progress of real esthetic art culture on the coast, you might send your art critic around to my stu. dio and takes some notes.’ ‘Might, eh ?' said the editor, ‘Yes, sir. For instance, there's a mammoth winter-storm landscape I've just finished for Mr. Mudd the bonanza king, It's called ‘A Hail Storm in the Adirondack,” and a visitor who sat near it the other day caught a sore throat in less than fifteen minntes. The illusion is so perfect you under- stand. Why I had to put on the finish- ing touches with my ulster and arctic uvershoes on.) ‘Don’t say.’ ‘Fact, sir; and then there's a little auimal gem I did for Gov. Gerkin the other day—portrait of his Scotch ter- loaded, and he made up his mind to see, The shoemaker waxed his thread and remarked : “I doan’d like some poys to come in here und fool aroundt mit mine tools.” Five minutes more have slipped in’ to the back townships of the past. The first boy hag gained five fieet on it. The second boy has ceased to whis- tle and began to wink. The third boy is only a neck behind the first, “Pecause,” continued the shoemak- er, as he cut out the patch, “it vhas dangerous to fool mit tools dot you doan’d know aboudt.” The first boy has the revolver. The second boy will bet him a cent he dasn’t snap it. The third will raise the bet two to one, Bang! Zip! Bluff’! Bullet rakes along the wall and throws mortar all over the shoemaker. Three boys stand and hold their mouths open. “Vhel, I hopes you feel petter;” said the shoemaker as he finished spanking A Diplomatist. ‘The next time I catch you loafing uround this plantation, I'll shoot off the top of your infernal head!’ ex- claimed Col. Lawson, addressing a tall gentleman of ebon complexion: ‘Every time you come around here something is missing.’ The tall gentleman placed one foot on a stump, and bringing his elbow to rest on his knee, looked at the Colonel for a moment and replied : ‘Yer say dat ebery time I comes yeah suthen’s missen ?' ‘Yes, I do.) ‘Well, dat's a mighty good sign dat it, ef I did, it woulden’ be missen’ when I comes, but I doan take ‘case when I goes er way.’ “You know what I mean, you black scoundrel ! ‘I knows whut yer say. ‘Yes, and you'll fell what I say if you don’t keep away from here. What has become of the plow that was lean" ing up there in the corner of the fence ¥’ ‘Ain't de plow dar now, sah? ‘Don’t you see that it is gone? ‘How ken 1 it's "Clare se¢ a thing when gone? de the proprietor called out : Toronto's livery stables, signaled to the proprietor, and gallantly handed a | young lady out of the carriage. The | pair were about to walk away, when | ‘Ahem ! Ope moment young man, | please.’ ‘Well 7” said the young man, coming back reluctantly, Ove dollar and fifty cents if you | please.’ ‘Ah——yes. Look here a minute, Mr ’ They stepped into the stable tor | gether, ‘You saw that girl?” queried the | young man, nervously. ‘Yes. ‘We're engaged.’ ‘Indeed ! ‘Yes; got engaged while we were out riding.’ ‘Well, I don’t see how that relieves you from paying for my team,’ said | the liveryman, dubiously. ore. . : ut it sug i ‘Oh, no, no,~~it don’t. gests a way to my mind.’ ‘What's that 7 ‘Hold on a couple of weeks and I'll pay you in duplicate wedding pres. | A young man drove up to one of | SECHLER & CO., Grocers, Bush House Block, Bellefonte, Pa, "NEW GOODS SPRING an We have endeavored to get the very best of e ~FOR THE — d SUMMER TRADE! aS very thing in our line, and now have some really CHOICE GOODS, FINE CREAM CHEESE, SELECT OYSTERS, J Extra Large FRENCH PRUNES) ® SWEET POTATOES, LARGE RIPE CRANBERRIES, PRI 'NELLES, IMPERIAL FI G85, BRIGHT NEW LEMONS, FLORIDA ORANGES, Princess Paper-Shell Almonds, Evaporated DRIED PEACHEg A FULL LINE OF CHOICE CANNED FRUITS. PRESERVED PEARS, PEACHES, PLUMS and I 'RUNELLES. PLAIN CANDIES, FINE CONFECTIONERY, GOODIES of all S. 1 i 11] Sorts and Kinds sar We invite the people of Centre county to call and inspect our NICE EE ————————— GOODS, which cannot fail to please, 1-tf c C SECHLER & CO. the last boy and shot him through the | {0 goodness rier Snap. The morning it was done ents,’ ’ white gennermens is er gettin’ so door. “Dot vhas shust like a poy. If g ne F gettin r a cat got into the studio and the min- ute it saw the picture it went through the window like a ten-inch shell.) ‘Did, eh ? vall he can’t pe still undil he kills ‘Yes, and the oddest thing about it | ked at the der rent and go pack to Shermany.” | 1 100 I cznvas the dogs hair was standing up was that when next all along his back like a Now how do you account for that? porcupine. ‘Dunno.’ ‘It just beat me. When work the he insisted gov- ernor examined the on my painting on a post with the dog chained to it. Said he didn’t know what might happen.’ ‘Good scheme,’ growled the edit. or. “Wasn't it though? You know Mr. | George Bromley, and how abstracted he is sometimes. one morning and brought up before an 8x12 of the San Joaquin river with a boat in the foreground. I'm blessed if he didn’t absent-mindedly his coat and step clear through the canvas trying to jump into the boat, thought he'd go out rowing, you know.’ | ‘Have they carried out that j man with the small-pox ?' said the ed. itor, winking at the foreman, who had come in just then from the composing- room to swear for copy. urney- ‘Small-pox ? That reminds me of a | realistic subject I'm engaged on now, entitled “The Plague in Egypt.’ | had only completed four of the principal | . figures, when last Tuesday, the janitor who sleeps in the next room, was tak- en out to the hospital with the most pronounced case of leprosy you ever Well he dropped in | take off mit no life insurance to square oop nn—- A — | A Story With a Moral | Handsome Young Millionaire—‘S8o | you would like a position as compan ion to my sister ?’ Pretty ‘Yes, i t would do my very best to I give satis Girl please ; | faction,’ ‘Can you sing ¥' ‘No, I am sorry to say.’ | | | | “You play the piano, I suppose ?’ | *No, I never studied music.’ | Ah! Probably, crockery or | ‘It : 11 18 Deed) then, you paint to I have no accomplishments, | ‘Indeed ! Why | passed your time since you sir; how have school ¥ y he Iping moth | ‘Pardon me for interrupting have said enough, and ‘Oh, do not say I will not do necessary, I can pick up some accom- | plishments in reasonable t sure “You will not do as a hired « ion because you are entirel y aati wt 1 f 41 € Desi ion; but i you ’ : half my fortune and me with it consider my self the | the world.’ | . did. She saw, and this morning the boy who | mixed the paints began to scale off like a slate roof. I don't know whether to keep on with the | How does it strike work or not, you? : ‘It strikes me you had better slide,’ said the unesthetic moulder of public | opinion. ‘Don’t care sround ‘No, sir.’ ‘Wouldn't like to order to send a reporter a ‘Gutenberg Discovering the Printing Press,’ ¢h 7 ‘Nary order. ‘Don’t want s 7x9 group of the staff done in oil or crayon ?' “No,” said the editor as he again low- ! really life-size | Bits | A rising business—<:\king yeast. Who ever heard |iDg a tune ? {| A man is seldom wind by whistling for a breeze, The capacity of a base ball pitcher he $ does not depend upon t number of quarts he will hold. When the woman thioks this world revolves around her husband sl urally speaks of him as ‘hub by.’ ‘He loved not wisely, but too swell’ was the remark made by a young man | who had been jilted by an heiress, ‘Darling has your love grown cold ¥' asked the bride of her young husband. he sees some tools hanging mit de | “| up heah ter day spectan’ ter hab pe If] f a hat-band play- | able to raise the | she nat, | feuis I kaint unpnersan’ ‘em ha'f de { time,’ eo | ‘I'll make you understand me, the some poor man dot leaves bis family | : | first thing you know. What became lof the saddle that was hanging on the | bannister, ‘Saddle gone too, Colonel 7 “You know it is now, you infernal theif ! “Took heab, doan come crowdin’ me dat way, I tries Kin, an’ I doan like t | pertation dragged erroun’ o' a white ia t nicl GRL DIghH pizen man's sj } een | | 3 | i ‘OU ed. | “Move : around here any H¢ his | turned and wal ’ . "tendin’ n an ’ OUR then, throwing one he looked back at the | wid yer. De niggers down on de Young | planation sent me up heah t 3 z er 'vailable cannurdate fur de | ad Yer « | Legislatur’, sees dat yer dean » ‘Hold on a minute, I thought you je wuld take a joke. takin’ eberything the “Yer ‘cused me o sitting on the top il of have been around here | long enough to know me.’ [to yer. ‘Come on, old boy, and let vk us Joe this matter over in a sensible or amin | ‘Yas, putty well 'quainted, 'bleeged | ——t the doctor's advice: ! | ‘Doctor I want you to d {i | Following y something for me. My nerves are shattered com { pletely. Iam not able to eat any- thing and I sleep very little at night. What would you advise me to do? ‘What bas brought sbout this con- dition ¥’ ‘Drinkingtoo much I an ‘Well, I would ady up drinking. ‘H'm, that idea nes i¥ ace | co — i ussanfeather after she indeed 1 wasn't 1 Miss F had recovered from her faiating 5 i airal ' sad | nj lanted this Lt thinking about i, how then can the way. | | The colored people know they have no | better friend than I am.’ He got down and approached the : Colonel. They talked for some time {and the smooth flow of conciliatory { word: of the Colonel were occasionally | interrupted by the pleased haw haw of the colored gentleman. When every: thing had been satisfacorily arranged old Simon said : tf vestler rch pienie’ | and she fixed up a lunch basket for the it rained so the | Io koe) the | lunch from spoiling we had | | preacher's table, but picnic could not come off preach " it for dinner, and it was the best dinner I've had since married. There was no chicken, and jellies, and that | sort of alleviations. 1 feel like a new ! | end of ! Terrning a. To mavts fm watfel ag “0 party it 2 politics, nor any sect in religion gebe THE GREATEST 1 JOEL) LAR I WEEKLY RELIGIOUS AND BECULAR NEW YORK OBSERVER r B : Dy PEEIENCED AND A LIVE NEWSPAPER. rage t and truth; and a Bpcoran Sa 5% wie Orme & 32 Park Row, N. Y. and adil PAINTING an APER HA THE 1 ,T "i Ww ILLIAMS & BRO, WALL PAPER PAINTS, &C, 3t- bet Spring & Water, Bellefonte Fis That we have in shox f Wa York. vis ne, Piste k the | Pager outs i" Em bosse NY oo s, Blacks a Great Variety Fatir borders is That we fro k's New Book of Os § put ue ¢ " have il receive 2 Fred Be ng Designs § elaborate Ce SIGN WRITING PAPER NANGING wnlete § vy ntry = int ted WILLIAMS & BROTHER O MOTHERS. ight and broken of your est 1 ADVICE Ave vou disturbed by a wick obd ting teeth? Mas, Wism T at n suffering snd crying with pais If so, send at once and get & bottle u's Ix Evavr ron Onnoaes noalenlable, Tt will relieve Deper i upon it It cures dyn Tt vals the poor little mothers, there sulferer immediately mist ke about it sr | eatery and diarrhoea, reg dates the stomach and bow. els, curds wind colic, softens the gums, reduoos in fammation and gives tome and energy to the whole, eyvtem. Mas Wissiow's Boorse Steer ron Onin Rex Tewrsiws is pleasant to the taste and i» the pre scription of ot feat and best female physic cians and pares, United States, and ie for sale by all droggists ¢ the world, Price £3 cen a bottle WANTED «To solicit orders o the « . FORKS HOUSE Coburn, Centre Co., Pa," GOOD MEA LS, CLEAN BEDS. PRICES MODERATE. sa HOTEL WITHIN TWO MIN UTES’ WALK TO STATION. 0 { . ¢ ishing grounds P rop'r. Excellent Hunting and } KLECKNER STUDIO. 2nd floor Bush Arcade, JOS, 1 am now ready to do all kin of PAINTING, (‘A PER A if End iy PECTFUI C. P, £€ilder, Quick Railway Time, J 4 y 4 I Rocky Ww BY HOSMER 1 Having most th Rock ford Quick T: last three years, | 7 3) Aten PANY HULI AND, roughiy tested n Watches for Sec. the a the at i i olier them with the fuilest confidence as the best made and most reliabie Lime kes per for the m oney that can be obtained. u : BT The Rockford wateh i 1879, has performed better than any Watch | ever bad. Have carried it every day and at no ime has jt been irregular, or in the least unre ! cheerfully recommend the Rockford Watch, HORACE B, HORTON at Dighton Furnace Co. RE. yo | an. 27 mirchased Feb. N 1889 liable, . Tavwrox, Se ot, 18, 188 The Rockford Wateh Dna IL curately ; better than any watch | ever owned, and | have had one that cost (#150. Can recommond the Rockford Watch to everybody who wishes a fine | timekeeper, ered himself in the depths of a leader | iy ‘ 4 . ) | ‘Not as cold as the coffee is,’ was his on the Roumanian imbroglio; but if SALESME) \ for sur¥Fruit and Orasemen tal Stock. A spledid line of new Specialties. Good wages, and steady employment given to reliable energetic | men. Write for terme to KB, B. Reonanpsox & Oo. S. P. HUBBARD, M. D. — T's mightily in need o' little money man, just as if 1 was born again. Don't This is to certify that the sab. Dat udder cannurdate is fling. tell me that rin yesterday didn’t do the Rockford you care to touch up two window waTeeling Tespouse. frames, some desk legs and the fighting editor’s black eye for four bits aud a lot of comic exchanges you can sail . in. ‘It's & whack I" promptly ejaculated the disciple of esthetic culture, and, borrowing & cigarette from the dramat. ic eritic, on account, he drifted off after bis brushes, atc ———— An Old Revolver. A boy went into a Michigan avenue shoe shop, says the Detroit Free Pres, to have his boots patched. Two other boys saw him there and entered and sat down. Ou the shelf in the shop was an old revolver, The reader will imagine 5 minutes to have elapsed. The first boy looked at the old weapon and grew uneasy. The second boy wished he owned it and began to whistle. The third boy wondered if it was The editor of a scientific monthly asks fir correct drawings of a tornado at work. An experienced married man ought to accommodate him. ‘What will the future be? asks an excited exchange. It is pretty hard to tell this early, but the chances are that it will be about as bad as the pres. sont. A scientist tells us that a bee can sting only once iu two minutes. Those who have tried assu re us that itis quite often enough. The inventive genius of this coun. try is becoming exhausted in providing work and fortunes for medical man. The latest success is a one-wheeled velocipede. a ‘May I bave the pleasure of seeing. you home ¥ he bashfully maked. ‘Cer. tainly,” she graciously replied. “There is a high hill just in front of the house; or, if you prefer ii, you oan climb a big tree in the cow lot. Go anywhere in’ his silver "mong de niggars, an’ I wants a leetle to sorter offset him ‘Bout ten dollar’ll do. Thaukee, sab,’ as the Colonel gave him the money; ‘wish yer good day, Mr. Ripersenta- tive. Shortly aftert the dipomatist went away, the Colonel discovered that a fine set of buggy harness was missing and that a game rooster, for which he had paid quite a large sum, was also gone. A ———— lu —————— ‘Yes,' said mn ant ‘I prefer small ay rties rather than large ones. y allow a greater concentration of energy, which of itself is an important element of success.’ —— ‘Bpeak of absent-minded men,’ observed Augur, ‘my husband is the most absent-minded man I ever saw. He hasi't had any mind of his own since we wee ried.’ Boled again I excisizaed the man as he went fly i he Pk ek + propelled where you can get a good view.” for the th his charmer’s | country any good. It was the most re freshing shower we have had for years.” «Texas Siftings. membisel i isp——— “You are looking extremely happy this morning, Smith,” said Robinson ; “what is the cause of the joy ?" “My mother-in-law is coming to see me," gleefully replied Smith, “Your mother-in-law | Good gracious, is that cause of happiness?" “You bet it is, The times are hard and money tight, My mother-in-law is a great church member, My wife both. ers the life out of me for a new dress that | cannot afford. I send up and in. vite her mother to come and soe us, I meet ber at the depot, put on a long face, tell her what a frivolous world itis, and how extravagance in dress prevents many men from sending more money to 133 Saxpos Lake Nomsenins, Guseva, N.Y The Cheapest and Best. The cheapest is not always the best But the cheapest Ammomiated Bone Phosphate that gives the best result is ™aDE THE MARK, Twenty-five Dollar PHOSPHATE. A Cheap and Reliable Crop Produ- cer that has given excellent results for five years, The best practical results have been obtained by intelligent farm- ers who use this brand season after season in preference to any other, In the foreign missions, By the time she eaches my house I have her loaded, and the new dress is promptly sat down upon, It is a good scheme.” Nor a onse for oculiste—Tho teacher who has a pretty pupil in his mind's thia instance the cheapest is the bes. For circulars giviog anal d further information, lyeis an or address BAUGH & SONS, Sole . eye, 20 Bo. Del. Ave, Philadelphia, cc | Watch bought Feb, 22, 1879, has very well the past year, Having vet it only twice during that time, its only variation being three minutes, It has run very much better than I ever an. ticipated, It was pot adjusted and only va. RB P.BRYANT, E RBERT BUTTS PRACTICAL HARNESS MAKER, Hion Sr, ¥Exr poor 10 Brrzgn's Mear Marker, Is prepared to do all kinds of Fancy and Heavy Harness Making at Reasonable Prices ands . ———————— a ————"
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers