Deora Yad Belletonte, Pa., January 8, 1915. THE FLOOR WALKER. (Copyright.) It was the crowded-bar hour of five In the afternoon in the Old King Cole fluid-refection room of the Hotel Astor- Knicker. At the far end of the onyx bar a young man with irresolute eyes and the chin of a non-combatant began to weep silently but copiously into his highball. The bareheaded attache of the re- fectory, who touched the weeper upon the shoulder within less than ten sec- onds after the beginning of the lach- rymose manifestation, looked as good as one of those House of Splooken- heimer clothing ads. He was tall, rangy and square-jawed. $i He was the floor walker of the refec- tory; an evolutionized bouncer. It took him less than two minutes to con- dole with the despairing one and to guide him gently to the exit. The weeper was not bounced; he was con- veyed to the outer air by a diplomatist, °° person who shaves engaged in and went away with his misery as- suaged. “Good eye,” I observed to the calm- eyed floor walker when he returned. “How did you spot that one so promptly?” “By keeping track of his in-dredges,” said the floor walker. “I happened to remember that one. He's a three-shot Terry. That is to say, when he seeps three moisties into his bilge the over- flow always begins to trickle from his wicks. Three for him, and the Joys do a bunny-trot away from him and the Glooms start in to turkey-mazurk all over him. “Then the saline solution begins to dribble from his orbs, which, of course, Is his getaway signal; for it wouldn’t do to have a sad sog scattering salt spray over the place when the bar is cluttered up with merry-merries, who hate grief and who are trying the best they can to forget even their own woes, without reaching out for the sobsky- music of zigs who insist upon diluting their booze with their tears.” arithmetical end of it,” I said to the floor walker. “How can you keep track of the number of liquid inserts that each of them, buying rapidly, per- mits to percolate through his frame?” “Practice, bo—practice, continued with that Argus stuff,” replied the cafe floor walker. “After I get through with this job I'll be able to do a vaude- ville turn as a lightning calculator. How many fervent Ferdies are there lined up there at the onyx now, would you calculate? A hundred, say you? Wrong again. There are a hundred and fourteen. Included in the bunch are 19 whom I've got classified on wmemory’s yellow pages, Myrtle, as dangerous. “Unsafe, that is to say, in different ways. Some of them are liable, if they go too far with the gimme-an- other request, to prong out the think that they're white hopes and stretch out their tentacles in search of mussi- ness. Others of the 19, if they stretch that please-refill-the-flagon thing too far, are likely to raise their pipes in unseemly protest on the subjects of re- ligion, baseball and politics, thus throwing in a flat wheel, so to speak, on the cathedral calm that should pre- vail in a fluid philansterie of this pat. tern. ‘Two of them, if they overstep their gurgle limit, will fall to atomizing their weeps until the plant will feel like it’s being sprayed by a Scotch mist. ’'N so on, ’'n so on, as Mr. Belasco says, nerv- ously, when he does not wish to have you read the remainder of your play to him on the street. “Well, I'm the Tabulating Tommy with those 19 unsafe boys. I know just how far down the damp road each of them can go without getting his standing lights blurred, and I'm there with the mentally registered statistics as to just how many intakes each of them has up to this moment eased into his facial orifice. Something at the top of my dome does an inaudible click each time any one of them creaks his elbow in the act of sifting a perfectly new and untried ball into his motor. “Thus, as each one of them treks along to the end of his little path, all I've got to do is the substraction stuff, waft the wigwag to the barkeep, and the one who has played his string as far as I know, from experience, it ought to be played, gets the sad and sweet shake of the barkeep’s bean the next time he calls for one more, and that is all there is to it. If the one upon whom the box is turned resents the shut-down he is passed along to me, and I dish up to him whichever article of bunkological balm he seems most in need of. “lI am not saying, get me, that any one of the 19 dangerous ones is liable to try to leap the barricade or scale the citadel today. They may go days and days before they vat up to the point where they will feel impelled to pull their rummiferous specialty. But I am peg-posted here for the purpose of watching that none of the breezy ones departs from the normal, and, if so, to chaperon them, without any sug- gestion of the crude or coarse work, into the open—" “But hold!” I interrupted. “How can you tell how many they’ve had be- fore they swing in here?” “That,” replied the floor walker of the high-grade fire-water foundry, “is where the Argus section of my sketch comes in. I can tell that by peeking them over when they zephyr in. I take an unobtrusive bat Hawkshawish slant at each and every patient as he nudgas through the door, for the pur pose of making a guess as to how many imbibings he has bestowed upon his concealed mechanism before get- ting this far up the line. “If their maps don’t reveal the story, then their chirps will. When, for in- stance, I accidentally overhear a just- arrived smudge telling the buddy with aim that none of the folks at home, in- tluding his spouse, understagd him, iog-gone the luck anyhow, then, even If I never have binocularized him be- fore, I know that he has been hurling wetties into his diaphragm not alone, yea, at one, but at several other points turther down the line, and I get the mental chalk on him and attend to it that he doesn’t reach the glug-glug stage of it through any fault of mine or the house. The sog who unlimbers It to his trudge-mate, at an early stage of the proceedings in a damp drum, that the wife of his bosom cannot and does not and will not understand him —that sog, if the act is permitted to proceed undisturbed, will fall to la- menting lachrymosely all over the up- per and lower bar rails just as sure as aigs ain't eggs. As you yourself have | lust seen, there is nothing sadder or more dispiriting to be observed in a groggery-de-luxe than the spectacle of listilling his own tears into perfectly good booze, guaranteed under the Pure Food and Booze act of 1906. “And when the weeper is doing it because, as he says in a tone loud enough for other persons to hear, he Is deeply and darkly and sadly misun- derstood at home, the said weeper frames into such an enticing figure to be booted all over the works and then out into the open, and the shoe-leather of so many men so twitches to do that same to him that it is highly desirable to get him out of the place just as soon as possible, if not by the conolog- ical method, then by the ‘raus-mit-em’ route. “It is the business of the floor walk- er in a Valenciennes-lace maison de redeye of this character to analyze the chatter of each of the patients who looks unsafe, all the time pretending, of course, that he couldn't hear a pres- ldent’s salute from a battleship if he was shining bright-work on the main | deck, and to see to it that the chirper ios i endency come “But you are not giving me the who manifests a tendency to be boisterous along the line of his par- ticular specialty shall not reach the point where he imagines that he is in the spotlight down-stage, with all of | the rest of the purchasers merely standing around acting the parts of the sunernumeraries. “You would be surprised to know how many zigs there are, who outside of that are all right, that fall to imag- ining, after they've tossed just one or two over their average number of hooters past their tonsils, that they are alone in a pleasant and animated little circle of one or two hundred fel- low rums, many of whom entertain the same quaint idea. “Since the merely taciturn or morose persons who do not care to shout about themselves while they are fun- neling stimulants into their frames, object to being reminded in a place like this of a cage filled with white- crested parakeets just arrived from Paraguay, it keeps me busy shaming the spotlighters into submission or pic- turing to them the hygienic advantages of a trapes on the flag-stones that run past the door. “There are so many sulky, self-con- tained, mean-spirited men coming into a flagon factory of this sort who don’t care to hear that Ty Cobb has it ninety ways on Alexander the Great, or that the wife of the Chinful Charlie next to him hasn’t the same old affection for him like what she used to have, no matter what he does for her and coughs up all his dough and gives her the life of a queen with nothing ever to do until tomorrow or even then— “There are, I say, so many surly visitors at a nose-paint pension of this sort who desire to throw off dull care and at the same time be quiet about it, that the floor walker has to be consid- erably jerry of his job in order to qui- escently quell and exigently extin- guish the gooks who, after they've trod over their Plimsoll capacity, develop the insectivorous idea that they are all alone in the madding crowd and that, therefore, they €an and must go as far or farther than they like with personally conducted tete-a-tete mem- bers bearing on and appertaining to little matters concerning themselves that nobody else could get interested in except on the paymen: of a large salary with house rent, forage and medical attendance free.” Newsies Are High Gamblers. Patrolman Hook was walking along Broadway between Fifth and Sixth streets the other day when he heard the shrill cry: “Give two, I got high game.” “Gimme low.” “Gimme Jack.” “Aw, how much you got for game?” And then came a great dispute over 22 and 24 and other totals. The patrolman looked all around, for those are the disputes of card- players. He could see no oné. The wrangle continued. It seemed to be coming from above. He investigated, and on the roof of the building at 529 Broadway he found a game in full progress, newsboys con- testing every point that might be de- bated. The boys were arrested and several decks of cards confiscated.—Los An- geles Times. Serves ’Em Right. “Critics have become exceedingly unpopular,” said the manager. “Yes,” replied the bill poster, “I understand they won't even let the niilitary critics get anywhere near the theater of war.” RETAINED FAITH IN GHOZTS Esglishman of High Position One of the Few Who Believed in Such Visitations. Robert H. Benson, whose death is re: corded, was one of the few remaining men of high intelligence and education who believed in the old-fashioned ghost. It may have been Lis opposi- tion to modernism, leading him to re- nounce the faith of his father, the arch- bishop of Canterbury, in favor of Catholicism, that impelled his prefer: ence for haunted houses of the old style, with malignant apparitions tramping on the stairs and clanking chains in the deep watches of the night, and dissipating themselves in revelries that include groans, moans and the passing of cold fingers across the throats of uneasy sleepers. The “manifestations” of Professor Hyslop and his mediums were not at all Mgr. Benson's ghosts. And he had noth- ing in common with Sir Oliver Lodge's hope of establishing intercourse with disembodied spirits across the ether, or with Henri Bergson’s elabcrate te- lepathic arguments. But he was willing to consider theo- ries of ghostly visitations that would not impair the old-fashioned concep- tion. A ghost might, for example, be the effect of some violent emotion which, like an aroma, still lingers around the scene of its original genera- tion and penetrates the consciousness of visitors. Or it might be the “astral body” believed in by the theosophists. Scientific help was not needed to ac count for ghosts in these ways, and psychologists were dispensed with, ex- cepting when they yielded to Hamlet's or Macbeth’s conceptions. Those con- ceptions are, in fact, more comfortable and satisfying than the scientific spec- ulations of the modern “highbrows.”— New York Times. WERE MEN, AND GENTLEMEN Cowpunchers of the Old West Have Been Rightly Depicted in the Pages of Romance. “The old West,” says Edgar Beecher Bronson, author of “The Vanguard,” “was just as romantic in real life as It appears in fiction. Possibly it is the only case of romance standing the test of one’s being actually on the spot. And the cowpunchers were gallant as courtiers. “There is a story of the Cheyenne coach when a man, a gentleman he called himself, from a big Eastern city, got exceedingly drunk and started to annoy a girl school-teacher who was going out to the school. “A cowpuncher who was the only other passenger on the coach, prompt- ly shoved a gun in his face and made him behave himself. Living out there in the open, the only good women they could remember were their mothers and sisters, and that’s what good wom- en represented to them always. So some of the Western fiction isn’t too romantic, after all.” Mr. Bronson may be regarded as an authority on the matter, for he was a working ranchman for 14 years. Before the Days of Steam. Ninety-six "years ago the people of Pittsburgh and Birmingham were re- joicing over the completion of prepara- tions for the opening of a bridge across the Monongahela at Smithfield street by the election of a gatekeeper and fix- ing of a rate of tolls. Foot passengers were to pay two cents, vehicles with four wheels and six horses 62% cents, two-horse vehicles, 25 cents, one-horse vehicles, 20 cents, horse and rider six cents, horse alone six cents, cattle three cents, and sheep two cents. A bill had been enacted by the legisla- ture in 1810 for the erection of bridges across the Monongahela and the Alleg- heny. The war of 1812 intervened and it was not until 1816 that the bill was re-enacted and the governor author- ized to hold 1,600 shares of stock in each bridge for the state. Work on the construction was begun in June, 1818. The cost of the bridge was $110,000. Frozen Food for Nerves. Whereas once upon a time “ices” (although not ice) were considered un- suitable for invalids, some doctors have now decided that they supply a needed stimulant in cases of nerv- ous breakdown and have tonic virtues of their own in certain fever cases. But the frozen dainties should be carefully prepared and contain only the finest ingredients, and it should be impressed on the invalid that he or she should eat of the ice creams, ste, only very siowly, in smal sips from the end of a teaspoon, and, 1 eed- less to say, with the express permis- sion of the physician. The most wholesome of drinks is : grapefruit juice squeezed into aer- ated water and iced. Frozen eggnog and frozen custards have their vir! tues, but are not so palatable as cream |! | ices, which likewise afford a good deal | of nourishment. Historic Fainting Spell. i Prince Oscar, the kaiser’s fifth son, | ; who has just returned to duty with the | , German army, left the fighting line | ‘after an engacement in which he saw ‘ the officers about him slaughtered by | Turcos and himself collapsed from | what has been pronounced a severe at- tack of heart trouble. In the Mexican | war Brig. Gen. Franklin Pierce of New | Hampshire fainted while in action from the pain of an injury sustained | when his horse fell on him. This in- i ecident—this unmanly fainting at a time when other people were getting killed—was used unmercifully to make Pierce a target for ridicule in later years when he ran for the presidency. —Hartford Times. ee Altogether Too Many Americans Are Open to Criticism in This Respect. | Save the First Molar. There are many medical men who do not recognize the importance of the frst permanent molar. Further than “I eat in a variety of places,” said a that, I believe many dentists are so broker who sometimes puts his feet | unmindful of the importance of that under the mahogany and again rests them on the footrail of a lunch coun- ter, “and 1 want to know why some veople who eat among civilized beings don’t learn better table manners. “This evening IT had dinner at a res- taurant where one may eat his fill for 50 cents up, according to the market, and at a table near me sat three men and three women. Very respectable ‘ooking people they were, too, and they vere paying considerably more than 50 cents per person for their repast. Their general manners were all right and it wouldn’t be fair to say they weren't ladies and gentlemen as that term is promiscuously applied. But you should see how two of the men and one of the women held their forks. “There is only one way to hold a fork properly and the person of good breeding always holds it that way. I won’t tell you how that is, because it would be a reflection upon your breed- ing. But one of those men took a strangle hold on his fork as though he wanted to wrestle his food with it, the other grabbed it as he might grab a shovel handle, and the woman had her fingers twisted around hers until you didn’t know just exactly what she would do with it. “Really, don’t you know, under some eireumstances bad manners are worse than bad morals, for the bad morals can be concealed from public view.” Medical. Doubt Cannot Exist INVESTIGATION WILL ONLY STRENGTHEN THE PROOF WE GIVE IN BELLEFONTE. How can doubt exist in the face of such evidence? Read here the en- dorsement of a representative citi- zen of Bellefonte. Mrs. John Mignot, E. High St., Bellefonte, says: “I suffered from a dull ache across the small of my back for several weeks. At times when I bent over or lifted, a sharp pain shot through my back. I had heard of Doan’s Kidney Pills and I knew that they were good, so I be- gan taking them, procuring my sup- ply at Parrish’s drug store. They cured me.” Price 50c, at all dealers. Don’t simply ask for a kidney remedy—get Doan’s Kidney Pills—the same that Mrs. Mignot had. Foster-Milburn Co., Props., Buffalo, N. Y. 60-2.-1t Books & Magazines. 2) RT © “Here is the Answers'in = WEBSTERS NEW INTERNATIONAL THE MERRIAM WEBSTER Every day in your talk and reading, at home, on the street car, in the office, shop and school you likely question the mean ing of some new word. friend asks “What makes mortar harden?” You seek the location of Loch Katrineor the pronun: ciation of jujutsu. What is white coal? This New Creation answers all kinds of questions in Language, History, Biography. Fiction, Foreign Words, Trades, Arts and Sciences, with final authority. ges 400,000 Words. 6000 iliustrations, Cost $400,000. 2700 Pages. The only dictionarywith & the new divided page,—char- acterized as "A Stroke of Genius.” India Paper Editions On thin, opaque, strong, India paper. What a satis- faction Lo own the Merriam \// Webster in a form so light NY and so convenient to usel One half the thickness and § weight of Regular Edition. Regular Editions On strong book paper. Wt. 1434 1bs. Size 1298x9¥ x Sinches. ‘Write for specimen {linstratiors, etc. TTR LARA 4d EET TTT VAM RAREST CORR AR Mention this publication and receive FREE a set of pocket maps. AEN R MECHANICS MAGAZINE For Father and Son AND ALL THE FAMILY Two and a half million readers find it of absorbing interest. Everything in it is Written So You Can Understand It | We sell 400,000 premiums $1.50 A YEAR 15¢c A COPY Popular Mechanics Magazine * 6 No. Michigan Ave., CHICAGO ¢ 59-48-4t tooth as to advise extraction. We need to educate not only parents but members of the profession that it is as important to preserve these teeth as it is to have a clean mouth.—Dr. W. A. Home of Rochester before the Dental Society of the State of New York That Scares Em. Tourist—You have an unusually large acreage of corn under cultiva- tion. Don’t the crows annoy you a great deal? : Farmer—Oh, not to any extent. Tourist—That’s peculiar, consider- ing you have neo scarecrows. Farmer—Oh, well, you see, I'm out here a good part of the time myself. A Rare Case. “Gadson is the most inefficient man I know.” “You are rather hard on Gadson.” “But it's the truth. He can’t even operate .the family phonograph.” enna Shoes. Hats and Caps. Costly New York Habit. The costliest of New York habits is that of keeping a supply of subway or L tickets in your pocket. If you have no ticket you have an even chance of | not being stuck for the fare; if you | have tickets, you say, as the other man makes for the window: “Come on. I've got tickets.” It’s a bum game; you simply can’t win.—New York Tribune. 3 She Knew Her Rignts. “Yes, grandma,” murmured the lit- tle gir! drowsily, “I'll be a goed girl and let you rock me to sleep. but you got to wake me up when mamma comes home so she can rock me to sleep regular.” Little Hotel Wilmot. | The Little Hotel Wilmot | IN PENN SQUARE One minute from the Penna Ry. Station PHILADELPHIA | We have quite a few customers from Belle-’ | fonte, We can take care of some more. i They'll likeus. A good room. for $l. If you | bring your wife, $2. Hot and cold running, water in every room The Ryerson W. Jennings Co. | 59-46 : ; Clot hing. if you BELLEFONTE, You CanSave $5.00 to $10.00 FAUBLE’ On Your Suit or Overcoat buy it at Fauble’s. Mid-Winter REDUCTION Sale now on. PENNA. 58-4 Automobiles. ..NEW FEATURES IN... STUDEBAKER CARS Three-Passenger Roadster and Five-Passenger “Six” Added to Line. Prices are Lowered. Tmkin earings, GN Floating = er Separate Unit Starting an 2R Pie. Hot Jacketed Carburetor, The equipment on all models includes the tem Gasoline gauge, dimming attachment 3-PASSENGER ROADSTER § 98 5-PASSENGR “SIX” TOURING 1385 GEORGE A. BEEZER, Propr. Improved Design and Manufacturing Method Add to Values. ear Axle, Crowned Fenders, Non-skid Tires on Rear, Lighting, Dimming Head Lights, Switch Locking De- rumble gasoline tank in dash, crowned fenders, Shibler carburetors and non-skid tires on rear wheels, . THE NEW PRICES. 2 BEEZER’S GARAGE. ~ RES e-Man Type Top, Oversize tires. agner separate-unit starting and lighting sys- for head lights, switch locking device, anti- 5-PASSENGER “FOUR” TOURING § 985 7-PASSENGER “SIX” TOURING 1450 59-3-tf Bellefonte, Pa,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers