84-lancast«r Farming, Saturday, December 16, 2000 On Being a Farm Wife (and other hazards) Joyce Bupp Your grandma or maybe great grandma probably wore one a lot. With it she gathered eggs, car ried a few potatoes or turnips, wiped a sticky face or a perspir ing forehead, dabbed up minor spills and kept her few everyday dresses clean for use several days in a row. But how many people don aprons today? I mean besides those nifty barbecue ones for the guys who like to do the outdoor grilling bit. How many of us who daily poke around the kitchen tie on one of those traditional cloth Experience Teaches City Slicker T SUSAN SULLIVAN Special To Lancaster Farming 1 have always envied farmers. Growing up in a very urban area, about 20 miles west of New York City; my view of farmers was limited to television commercials and one or so “country drives.” To me, a farmer was someone who drove a tractor; had trained cows that laid around in a field; had winters off; raised nonde script dogs that chased people and cars; and waved to everyone. So after a really “fun” divorce, very close neighbors telling me what to do, and my children be coming street smart; I decided to move to the country and become a farmer. I bought a small farm, complete with house, barn, pond, and fields. I was on my way to the laid back life of farming, so I thought. My experiences from that day on, have taught me, never to as sume how easy someone’s life ap pears. Now, my view of farmers Heavy Duty Headlocks Finished withTGIC Polyester Powder Coating... Superior to Epoxy! • Extra Heavy Construction • Yokes lock on individual catches • Yoke stabilizer on large sizes • Designed for easy entry & exit • Removable neck bar LAPP S B. ing coverings before we get started measuring and mixing? Not me. Not usually, anyway. Still, there I was, tying on an apron a few days ago over my jeans and turtleneck. Because I was baking a pie. And at least for me pie baking is messy; I end up dusted with flour from head to toe. Or did. Before I started taking the shortcut. having donned the apron, from habit, I poured my home made pumpkin pie filling into a frozen pie shell and popped it in the oven. And did it with the is that they aren’t laid back, they are exhausted. Their cows aren’t trained; they are just resting up for the next freedom run (through your body) to the neigh bor’s lawn and flower bed. Usually, the neighbor lives far away so that it takes all day to get the cows home. I know now that electric fences are designed to jump start your entire body, after you have succeeded in get ting the cows back. I’ve learned that two barn'cats can make 50; that roaming chickens never lay eggs, they just relieve themselves on the front porch. Hand-raised geese become dis turbed pit bulls in feathers. Pigs are not for riding nor for sled ding with (they hog the sled). Cute, little groundhogs are really nasty, destructive creatures with a thousand lives or a thousand relatives. And last but not least; I’ve learned that nondescript farm dogs are really socially mal adjusted, egomaniacs that think 5935 OLD PHILADELPHIA PIKE, GAP, PA 17527 PHONE: 717-442-8134 • FAX 717-442-3112 SALES & SERVICE Call or write for free catalog. 3 Sizes Available To Meet Your Cattle Handling Needs * CA Series: 7 locks per 10’ • HE Series: 6 locks per 10’ • CO Series: 4 or 5 locks \er 10 lUIPMENT same absolute lack of “guilt trip” I find in whipping up instant po tato flakes with milk and butter to hold gravy. Fact is, guys, as our lives get busier and busier, we’re all look ing for shortcuts to the tradition al things. And, in reality, it’s often more economical anymore to use prepared shortcuts, rather than starting from scratch, even before figuring in one’s time. And never do we need short cuts more than during this busy holiday season, when we try to cram in all the extra special things of the season. Thus, you’ll find more and more of us print ing out holiday list mailing labels on our computers, maybe even sending e-cards to our e-pals via e-mail. That’s after we’ve fin ished e-retailing with an e-Santa at an e-mall. It’s become a breeze to bag the roll-out, cut-out, decorated cook ies in favor of the slice-off kind with a seasonal motif pre-printed in the dough. Or dropping them via a bag mix to which we add milk and eggs. And, in a pinch, a gift doesn’t have to be wrapped, it can be tucked into those won derful decorative bags under a fluff of colorful tissue paper, and still look beautifully festive. they rule the world. But to be very honest, farming is not a way of life that you can give up or would want to after you have tasted it. Each day is a lesson, an adventure, and a memory. For me to reach my goal of being a farmer, 1 need to be first a vet, chemist, weather forecaster, mechanic, and an eco nomic wizard. I need to work long, long hours with very dan gerous equipment and uncooper ative co-workers (mainly cows). So, I am just very proud to live among farmers; to know some as friends; and to have worked for some. I believe that my children , and myself, have immensely ben efited from knowing and living among, some very amazing peo ple called farmers. Mahoning Outdoor Furnaces IRKS FOR c FURTHER THAN HERE! WOOD - COAL - WASTE O Mahoning Outdoor Furnaces 1 -800-692-5200 www mahoningouldoorfurnace com Dealerships Available in some areas A local supermarket flyer came just days ago featuring a full-color, four-page insert crammed with photos of lovely, luscious pre-prepared holiday food trays: veggie, meats, cheeses, meats and cheeses mixed, shrimp, assorted breads, cookies. Ail lovingly appointed with decorative touches and pitch-out containers. An hour or two after perusing that, I spotted containers of ready-to-stuff homemade stuf fing in a meat retailer’s deli-dis play. And then there are the pre stuffed birds, pre-cooked whole hams, even order out a whole holiday dinner. Which, if you have to prepare for several days, serve and then clean it all up for the better part of the holiday, that option looks more inviting all the time. Is my age showing here...or what? But of all the shortcuts we might concoct in reality or our dreams my hands-down favor ite this year is the instant, deco rative, holiday gingerbread house. So easy, a 5-year-old can do it. Really. I have seen and become a be liever. th Ab Tranquil moments on the farm are few for Susan Sulli van. 3 YEAR ALL MODEI STANDARD MOI WOOD -C MULTI-FUEL MOI SAFER! LESS CHANCE OF HOME FIRE, 'ROM Actually, the festive ginger bread house came as a kit, com plete with icing bag and appro priate candies to add all the colorful decorative touches. Our daughter found it at a mass mar keter and snatched it up for use as a family project for the kids. It’s sort of like those real houses that arrive in pieces on one big truck. Hammer together Part A to Part B, then attach to Part C. Only in the case of the ginger bread house kit, you glue or goo those parts together with in stant squeeze-and-stick frosting. Plunk it next to a cherry red poinsettia and viola! pic ture-pretty seasonal display. Having seen this, I’ve forgiven myself for never having done a gingerbread house from scratch for my kids. No one had devised instant ones in a kit two decades ago. With all the wonderful cook ing and entertaining shortcuts which keep rolling out of the food marketing business, we kitchen engineers may soon be able to relegate our aprons to the endangered-species list. Something tells me I should feel more guilty about that than I do. tF EFFICIENCY RATING 83% TO 85% WITH Oil OR GAS FIRED UNITS J*E*rrol/*6*£tWIOME
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