84-Lanca«ter Farming, Saturday, April 5, 1997 Family Living Focus by Adams Co. Extension Agent Nina Redding Crossed Wires At our house, Russell says that when he does the supper dishes in the evening he’s sending me a message. The problem, I told him, is that I don’t really know exactly what message he is sending unless he verbally tells me! Sure I can guess, but what if my assumption is wrong? The marriage relationship is all about communications and under standing each other’s communication. Hoe’s a great article I read recently from the British Colum bia Concerning Couples newslet ter. Have you ever had a conversa tion like this with your mate? Wife: “You never tell me you love me anymore!” Husband: “I do so. All the time.” W: “Yeah, Become Certified Babysitter COLLEGEVILLE (Montgomery Co.) Young people ages 11-14 are invited to a program that will help prepare them to become a better babysitter. The 4-H Babysitting Course will be offered at the Montgomery County 4-H Center this spring. The Center is located on Route 113, near Skippack, just one mile south of Route 73. The course meets for six sessions, Tuesdays and Thurs days, beginning May 13 and ending May 29. from 6:30-8:00 p.m. All course mater ials will be provided by the 4-H program and participants will become 4-H members as a result of taking the course. The course will also include the American Heart Asso ciation “Choke is No Joke” program, which provides instruction on the Heimlich man uever and how to pre vent choking. Certifi cates of Achievement are awarded to those who successfully complete this impor tant part of the 4-H Babysitting Course. Class size is limited to 20 and you must be at least 11 years old before the course begins to participate. The cost of the course is $5. Scholarships are available. Please register by calling the library at (21S) 379-2077. ner, I reached out and took your hand. Then later, I smiled at you when you came back, into the room from the kitchen.” W: ‘That's not telling me you love me! I want to hear it I want to see it written on a card...” H: ‘‘But I tell you I love you all the time by the things that I do.” Does this conversation, or one like it sound familiar to you? Cou- ples miscommunicate all the time, ' because they-simply don’t pick on what they are trying to tell each other. Sometimes it seems like you’re listening to different radio stations at the same time and not even close to being on the same wavelength. In verbal communication, inter pretation is difficult enough. NEW JOHN DEERE 466 AND 566 ROUND BALERS Perfect bale after perfect bale... acre after acre Among the seven new John Deere round balers are two especially suited to large-acreage hay fields... the new 466 and 566 Round Balers. Perfect bales - every time - start with the exclusive new BaleTrak* Plus monitor. It’s the most advanced monitor-controller available - and it’s a standard feature. Virtually every function is controlled on-the-go from the cab - from setting bale diameter to adjusting the twine spacing and number of wraps. New pickups pack more hay into the bale. The patented, new Mega Tooth pickup features stronger teeth and three times the pickup power. It’s ideal for tough or wet crops. The wide-pickup option is perfect for gathering scattered windrows. Or, choose the standard pickup with increased strength over previous models. Both balers feature John Deere’s field-proven variable-belt forming chamber with exclusive staggered, diamond-tread belts. These reduce both ADAMSTOWN EQUIPMENT, INC. Adamstown, M 717*494*4911 BADTnrtM CLUGSTON AG bucipi n BARTRON BTiißßiur ENFIELD SUPPLY, INC. ctIS,PA EQU £ M i N .V NC ' Ttinkhmnoek, PA 717-2(14103 omoHi 71743(4011 PMKIBI CARLYLE A MARTIN, INC. Htgtretown, MO 301-733-1(71 CARROLL’S EQUIPMENT RoulilM Oanwon, MO X1472-(Ml CLUGSTON FARM ELDER SALES A A.B.C. GROFF, INC. LANDIS BROS. EQUIPMENT SERVICE INC. NwHoUand. PA INC. Nwdmora, PA Btomboro,PA 717-33441(1 Übtnon, PA 717473-2211 412-37(33(0 717-22(-2((0 DEERFIELD AG A TURF CENTER, ENFIELD EQUIPMENT, INC. WhlMord, MO 1014(242(2 INC. WatMfltawn, PA 7174K-MS7 DUNKLEA QRIEB INC. C«ntnHall, PA (143(4-1421 FINCH SERVICES HANOVER INC. Hmwtr.PA 717-432-2344 DUNKLEA QRIEB INC. QHEENLtJE SUPPLY, MM Had, PA 717-72(3111 “What did you mean when you said...?” But when it comes to the nuances of an intimate relation ship over time how do you communicate messages between the two of you in ways that are understood? We all have different ways that we like to be told we are loved, cared for, respected, needed, appreciated, etc. Some people like to hear the actual words. Others like it to be written down, yet others know by what another does for them. A common problem is that we often let our partner know how we feel in ways that make sense for us. Unfortunately, this may not be the most accurate means of communicating with our spouse. A first tip is to watch the ways your spouse says “I love you.” They are giving some very broad hints about how they like to be told. The second, is to have a con versation about it How do I like to be told? How do you? The following questions can be used to guide your conversation. If you tend towards introversion, you will find this exercise more helpful if you take some time to think about your responses before you schedule a date to talk about it together. , 1. What is '(are) my personal preferred way(s) of knowing that QUTSHALL'S INC. RD 1280X74-A LoytvllM. PA GUTSHALL'S INC. CarlM*, PA 71734(2313 K A W EQUIPMENT INC. MlClMwntttt. HoordMal, WV 2MM LOST CREEK SO4 ** MOM IMPLEMENT Oddnd Wto, M 717*4iM191 LANDIS BROS. INC m. m a lit 772 MILLER-LAKE INC. 8710 ML Joy M. MImIIIo. M Manhofm, M 17MI mZU 7174004340 MX UidooMMl, PA 41241(1234 you care for, love, respect need and appreciate me? Specific ways that you could communicate this to me are: 2. What do I notice about how you communicate this to me? What hints do I think you are giv ing me about how you like to be communictaed with? (Check them out! Arc you accurate in your guesses?) 3. How do I typically let you know that I care for, respect love, appreciate you? Am I using the most effective means? 4. Something that you do or say, which I am not sure about the meaning of is... 5. When I do or say , I don’t get the response I am expecting. By this, I mean to com- Bone Up On Calcium LANCASTER (Lancaster Co.) Learn how to encourage good bone development in adults and child ren. This workshop held at the Lancaster Farm and Home Center will teach how to boost calcium content in casseroles, soups, and salads, and how to get enough cal cium fin* those who don’t like dairy products. Recipes and food sam pling will be offered. The free leaf loss and bale chafing. You’ll build tight, dense bales that stand firm and tall when others slouch and sag. Choose the baler that best fits your operation. The 466 Baler makes 4-foot wide, 6-foot-tall, 1,650-pound bales; the 566 Baler makes 5-foot-wide, 6Toot tall, 2,200-pound bales. Visit your John Deere dealer to see hovy these new balers combine field-tested productivity with new time-saving baling controls. PIKEVILLE EQUIPMENT INC. Otoy, M 010-007-0277 LEHIGH AG EQUIPMENT Altontmm, PA (104N-2M3 LONE MAPLE SALES A SERVICE NmAlmndrii, M 4124 M-7172 POLE TAVERN EQ. SALES CORP. from.« Brmr.NJ HMHM O.C. RICE, INC. 104 North thin 0t ■HiorvWo. Minor 717-077-0131 The exclusive new BaleTrak Pius monitor lets you control' baling without leaving the tractor seat. Chpose the bole site, then opt far twine spacing orsuiface-wrap (or switch Bom oae-fd'lhe other). Kotr can even select the number of twine end-wraps or surface-wraps, and set the distance of twine Bom the bale ends. SCHEFFEL WALTEMYER'S EQUIPMENT CO. SALES A SERVICE 720 Rod Qoooo NO. 10130 WMtrUown Road lomonol,M RodUon,M 111 111 WOO 717-344-0100 MILLER’S EQUIPMENT NDfIRtOO Ftirmount City, M SMITH'S IMPLEMENT, INC. Mmmburg, M 717-32HM4 WINELAND EQUIPMENT, INC. IlHtlMbUlt, M 914*7134109 S.P.E., INC. M.B. YEARSLEY Rd. I.loxlf? A SONS To ** na ’ M WMCtwdMr, M 7174994440 910 0001000 TOBIAS EQUIPMENT CO., inc. JEWMSsSmM H99RB.M A through to you? How could I send you this message more accurately? After you have this conversa tion (not always the easiest one to have, and undoubtedly more diffi. cult the longer the time you have been crossing wavelengths), sit down and come up with a list of seven ways you can accurately communicate care, respect, love, etc. to your spouse. Try one a day, all week. At the end of the week, take the pulse of your relationship. Have things changed? Check in with your spouse. Are you communicating more accurately? How could you fine tune this even more? Seems like a lot of work? Well, healthy relationships do take work, but the, rewards are worth it! workshop taught by Nancy Wiker, family living agent, will be offered twice on April 18, from 10-11:30 a.m., and from 7-8:30 p.m. Register by sending your name, and address to Extension Training Center, Farm and Home Center, 1 1383 Arcadia Rd., Lancaster, PA 17601-3184 or call (717) 394-6851.
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