' 4> '1950 ° ow To Park Your Car At The Top Of The Hill And Get Away With It I would like to point out that this article was written after extensive re search, including personal interviews and close observation of the tech niques involved. Everyone is familiar, by now, with ~parking rules and regulations which govern the resting place of auto mobiles within the territorial con fines.' of Highacres. It is common ;knowledge, too, that any student who, with careless abandon and reckless defiance, would venture to park his car somewhere in the high altitudes, has little chance of escaping a yellow tag which invites him to contribute two bucks to the "we'll-build-a-bus stop-shelter with- this-money-or-you don't-take-your-finals" fund. From the careful study which I mentioned earlier, five distinct meth ods have been discovered: A. THE CAMOFLAGUE METHOD Veteran students should be good at this sort of thing, and non-veterans can catch on easily. The car is brought to the to of (hill near one of the school buildings; various (boards and trailing vines are strategically arranged to resemble an addition to the Botany Building. A variation .of this idea—cut a crescent shaped( slot in the r car door and it will pass for one of those, familiar rustic edifices. B: THE OLD TICKET GAG If the car owner has already been tagged once his future js assured, he needs — nretely to ceep-" the original GERMAN CLUB Der Schnitzelbankverein, Highacres' busy German Club, has been pushing its Overseas Relief Drive_tor clothing, games, books and school supplies for the past few days. The entire student body had been requested to help the club in the collection of the articles to make the drive a success. The collected articles will be distributed through a relief organization to chil dren and students in Europe. This project has been conducted in connection with their G. Y. A. (Ger man Youth Activities) Project of the United States Army, of wich Der Schnitzelbankverein has-been •a mem ber for the past 16 months. The club keepis correspondence with an indivi dual club, DER JUNGE KREIS, in ,Schwabmunchen, Bavaria, a German student group similiar in age and interests to •bhose here at Highacres. Der Schnitzelbankverein has also had a successful bowling party at Patty's alleys in Hazleton on Wed nesday, March 29, and is planning a swimming party for late in April with the Pottsville Center German Club as its guest. At the business meeting •on April 19, the club mem bers will be honored by the presence of Mr. John Lorah of Hazleton. Mr. Lorah who is a well-known 'chess ex pert will help the - club in getting a Chess club started. At this meeting plans for a Bpring picnic will also be made. yellow tag and place it prominently 'under the windshield wiper. This will keep away new invitations to con tribute to the Safety Committee. Fund. C. LICENSE PLATE JUGGLING If you have a relative in North Dakota or Pakistan, or can get same "foreign" license plates, a few nuts and bolts will solve the parking prob lem. Merely attach_ these strange plates and pretend you are a visiting politician—you will then receive "po litical Immunity." D. MECHANICAL DIFFICULTY.. . This, one is not guaranteed, but a bit of acting ability can put it over very nicely. If you happen to be tagged, as you surely will, you can explain with a long face and worried look that your starter is out of, com mission or your battery worn down. and you must have that long run down Ole hill in order to get it started. E. LEGAL MEANS There are legal permits issued for parking on the upper strata, and these can be obtained for bona-fide reasons. For example, if one were to cut off his left leg it woul be assured that you would receive a permit and never have to worry •about conniving or scheming for this privilege. Of course, the Safety Committee will read this article and thus render all of this painfully collected,. advice useless, but whynot try - itAyway— What's the matter—you chicken? A 'Sin Of Omission It has been brought to our atten tion that a grievous error was made in the list of honor students published in the previous issue of the Collegian. Mr. Sheldon Vilensky promptly informed us that , his name had been omitted. A check up of the offi cial honors list showed this to be true. John Hall also lost in the shuf fle. Fo'give us, fo'give us! LOOSE SCANDAL Jim Prete is getting a box of Par odiesin his Easter Basket. * * * ,If Cleo Taylor fails Commerce 40, it won't be Mr. Longs's fauls, he even loaned her his hook. * * * Poor George Woods must be in a terrible physical shape. He's always in the dispensary. * * * The shipment of red leather couches for the Psych 21 class is due this week. Deep Conversation Passing thru the halls one day, I overheard a student inviting his companion to cut his afternoon clas ses so they could attend a movie. His reply was: "No, thanks anyway, but I need the sleep." H , A.z , LF,V.-,o ,N__:::c'o.,-,L.L..--.E;--Q1...,.A.N. The First Aid instruction program, a part of Phys Ed 4, is another addi tion to this year's program. The young men swated in- bandages in one of the photos am practicing the fine, art of treating injuries in this "until the doctor comes" curriculum. Students who pass this course, also, will get a certificate in this from the Red Cross. The main offshoot of this depart ment is the basketball team. The coach is, naturally enough, Syd. Now ABOUT SYD. He was born in Philadelphia . . . in the twentieth century. Mr. Rudman's successive alma maters included: West Phila. High School, W. Chester State Teachers' College (one year), Penn State Colege; B.S. in '42, M. Ed. in '47; finally, he is a recent summer candidate for Doctor of Education Degree at Penn State. Syd was a U. S. Army Athletic Officer for rthite and one-half years; this •is his fourth year in his present position at HUC. Our coach is not married—and does he make out! His other accomplishmensts: His teams have been runner-up in the State Junior College tourney twice and have hit the jackpot once. His summers are ideal vacations with pay —as athletic director at summer re sorts in New York state. This summer Sfyd will be at the Ambassadors Hotel in Fallsburg, N. Y., with the Bradley University team as assistants. First Aid Clast Syd Rudman Page Thre that the season of ac e competition is over, Mr. Rudman is peering into the future with the hope of a more successful season next year. Walt Stanek, Zack Taylor, Jimmy Mulli gan, Leon Lefkowitz, Bob Green, Jack Krause, Reese Davis, and Emil Hutyan are all first year students and may see better times in the second. This year's cage campaign, however, saw some very hard-fought, tense games against top-notch opponents. FUTURE PROJECTS: Top priority for the next few weeks is the formation of an intra-mural softball league. The term "intra-mu- Ami ral" is slightly misleading, for 41011111110. league is open to all teams composed of Penn •State Center students in Haz leton. This is really good news, for there are few chances far any one with •the least athletic inclinations to practice same. Syd has stated that the origin of the league is of his in stigation, but if it is to be successful, these students must be the driving force. Any group of sudents can or ganize a team and be recognized merely by submitting the roster of under 15 names—at least nine names, of course. The designated team man ager must submit this list before April 14th The games are scheduled to be played on our unnamed, littered ath letic field; they all start after 2:30 in the afternoon. A meeting of all managers of teams is slated for April 17 in Syd's Ath letic office. From then on, meetings will be weekly get-tagethers; their purpose will be to iron' out disputes and schedule difficulties which will cer tainly arise. Here's a juicy bit of detail—the umpires for these games will the drafted from the Phys Ed majors. At a recent meeting of the P.J.C. A. A. arrangements for a golf and tennis tournament at the campus the first or second week in May were made. 'Anyone interested in trying out for, and eventually representing HUC should see Mr. Rudman imme diately. There is no apparent means of practice for these people, but ma chinery is in motion for the acquisi tion of the golf and tennis facilities of the Country,Club.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers