Friday, October 17, 2008 Relationship dynamics By Alyssa Weinstein stuff writer abws()s3 (S' psu.edu My column this week is going to be a two-parter. I would first like to address the article written by the anonymous source (Oct. 3) who claims that girls go for bad guys and they blow off the good guys. First of all, girls don't always go for bad guys. However it is true that a lot of girls like to have a little bit of adventure in their lives, and as ignorant as it may sound, the truth of the matter is. you are more likely to go on a racy date with a “bad boy" than you are with a nice guy. That is what makes them nice, they like conversation and they like to listen to you rather than being spontaneous. Unfortunately, it doesn't just suck for the nice guys, it ends up hurling the girls too. The anonymous writer is cor rect in wondering why girls will take all kinds of abuse from guys just because they are adventurous and attractive. It is because for the most part girls aren't looking for a guy to listen to them, we have girl friends for that. We want to have fun with our boyfriends. Truthfully, it gets us in trouble. The majority of the guys 1 date are the typical “bad boy." Now is that smart? No, but I do it anyway. I go for the guys that have a motorcycle oi a pick-up truck and listen to punk rock music and do less than legal things- and it usually never works out. as predicted. Then 1 complain about how badly I have been hurt to all of my guy friends and they all give me the same answer, "stop dating Who Bv Rob Frank contributing writer rgfl 26(° gmail.com One of the biggest drivers in American culture is movies. On average. Americans spend millions of dollars per year either going to movie theatres, rent ing or buying movies, or watching the Oscars. Take Titanic for example. Since its release in 1997. it has grossed over $6OO million. As much as Americans love movies, they thirst for more. This desire usually drives two common responses front the movie industry, sequels and remakes. In this vein. 1 want to explore three movies that have had multiple characters playing the same role, either through a remake or a sequel, and I want to give my opinion of who played the characters the best. The first of the three is the longest movie series running. James Bond. Not only is James Bond the ultimate agent, but every man that leaves the theatre There have been movies where the main character is played by multiple actors. We need more fall. The leaves are changing colors, the football season is getting interesting, you need a light jacket but it’s not cold enough that you need your huge winter coat. I think we need less winter and more fall. Anyone disagree and think we need more snow? I didn’t think so. A note to all of the guys out there who think they are being pushed aside lor the bad guys, we can't always recognize that they are bad until it is too late. So thanks for your sympathy, we aren't just doing it to piss you off. We don't realize that you like us and deliberately screw you over for a guy who we already know is a bad idea- that is not how it works. Many girls do believe in fairy tales and true love. We date guvs who we think will fulfill that dream, some times they do and sometimes they don't, it has nothing to do with intentionally picking destructive men. We just date guys we arc attracted to. physically or emotionally. Let's talk about the "friend zone". While we arc on this topic (because it leads into part two of this weeks col umn). Guys don't purposefully get put into the friend zone despite popular belief. When we find guys that we trust, like being with, and guys wc can talk to. they become our friends. Why is that a bad thing? Why do guys always have to complain about that? Don't you want to be our friends? Or do you only talk to girls because you want to date us? I am really tired of my guy friends telling me that they hate being in the friend zone. Plus, if you watch the movie Just Friends, he not only gets himself out of the friend zone, he gets to be with the girl he loves. So guys, lets pick some thing new to dwell on shall wc? It she likes you enough to be with you it shouldn't matter if you arc friends with her or if you guys met a couple weeks did it best? after a Bond Hick wants to be him There have been many people that have played the character of James Bond, but 1 feel that Daniel Craig excels in the role. 1 know what you're thinking, “What about Scan Connery'.’''. Connery is a close second, however Craig is the full package. Not only is he smooth and sauve. as Pierce Brosnan was in the role, he has the badass quality that Connery had. I know that Craig has had only one movie under his belt, but the previews for Quantum of Solace show Craig per forming consistently with his acting in Casino Rovale. Next on our cinematic journey wc take a stop at Gotham City for the Batman series. The Batman series has spanned several main characters and a few differ ent directors as well. I'm going with Christian Bale as the ultimate Batman. I also feel that I'm going to have to defend my decision in this one. When I think of Batman I always think of a vigilante fighting for what he believes in. no mat Who did a role the best? James Bond: Daniel Craig Batman: Christian Bale Superman: Christopher Reeve Perspectives This brings me to my next topic, should two friends start a relationship despite the fact that they could ultimate ly end up losing each other as friends if things go south? Yes. I don't understand why everyone is so scared to take a chance. We are the generation of people who think they are invincible, or at least that's what I was told in driver's ed. Our generation dies in more car accidents because they don't wear seat belts, they speed, and they drive recklessly. We constantly partake in high risk behav ior. so why not a relationship? The worst that can happen is you break up. and if you arc worried about that you can become friends. I don't care what anyone says, relationships do not ruin the friendship; that would be people that do that. 1 am friends with every single one of my ex's. It's easy to be friends with someone as long as you want to. For example. I hooked up with a guy and wc still managed to stay friends and not allow it to become awk ward. You may have to work at keeping a friendship, but everyone has to do that. Relationships of any kind are hard, but if you are attracted to someone, their mind and body, forget about ruining your friendship with them. You can stay friends. Using your friendship as a rea son against exploring a relationship shows that you expect your relationship to fail. Anyhow, can you know some thing will fail unless you try it? Trust yourself. If two people are meant to be together it is going to happen whether you are friends or you happen to have a serendipitous meeting. ter the cost. I never really got that feel ing from Michael Keaton. Bale appears conflicted, confused and unsure of his path throughout both movies. He knows what he “needs" to do. but is constantly questioned by both himself ami those around him. I think this is exactly how Batman should be portrayed, which is why 1 choose Bale. Let's not forget that Bale is also cast as the new John Connor in one mv mv all lime favorite movie series Terminator My final movie series pick is from Superman. Although Brandon Routh played a good role in Superman Returns, by far Christopher Reev e played the best Superman. Not only did he look the part, he played it exactly as anyone would have envisioned Clark Kent. I'm proba bly partial to this choice because I grew up with Superman as my favorite hero, and w ith Christopher Reeve playing him. Not to mention the fact that Christopher Reeve was a hero both is real life and in the movies. In my opinion: Have an opinion? e-mail jdjso6l ©psu.edu The friend zone By Nathan Carter staff writer nrcs()69(s' psu.edu As a guy. I’d like to sit you all down for a chat and formally address the "friend zone” that girls so often throw us into. Is this good or had? Most guys think it’s the worst thing you can do to one of us, and I think that in most cases I would agree with that. However - and 1 can already hear the boos and heckles from the guys reading this - there are definitely girls in my life that I think being in that "friend zone” is on the borderline of best. Consequently this "borderline best” is equal to "border line worst". People who are fans of one night stands and hook-ups aren't going to understand any of this, but for the peo ple who try to find something more meaningful in everything they come across, this will make prefect sense to you. Listen, I love listening to people tell their stories or express their feel ings because in the majority of my years I haven't been able to truly put a grasp on my opinions. Now. that I’m in college I am more aware of the opin ions and styles that set me apart from others. In my high school - and proba bly most high schools across the coun try - there were four distinct groups: the preppy crowd, the rednecks, the gangster-wannabes, and then there was us. My group of friends and I loved the outside of the loop. I suppose it was some sort of subconscious need to laugh hysterically at what other people viewed as important. Even looking back on that now. I see that we were just another class in our selves. We weren't original or different or any other adjective we all try so hard to achieve. We were "the bridge": the bridge between all of those other groups, because we didn't maintain that polar extremity it took to be in those groups. We had it all. We had nothing more and nothing less than it all. and they were some of the best years of my life. The difference between us and them was that we didn't care about how we looked in the morning or what Eb Blues, on the rocks By Connor Sattely managing editor ciss()6o(s' psu.edu How can I explain to someone why I don't drink? I think the first word out of my mouth explains it all to me, and to those who share my passion: music. A few days ago, around midnight. I let all the prob lems that I'm going through stack up on me. I spiraled out of control and. luckily, was talking to a friend who kicked my ass back into the realm of sanity. But how's this for unpredictable: I left my computer, got in my car. and drove to campus and jammed, by myself in the empty Reed Union Building, for a full hour. I left feeling drunk, exhausted, elated, satisfied. Why am I okay with not having sex before marriage? Why am 1 okay with not drinking, or trying drugs, or smoking? Beeause to me. the best relief is musical. Pouring your soul on a three and a half minute recording of Jamey Ahersold playing Bb blues. Finding that note that you can lip up to and growl and hold it until you are about to cry beeause it portrays your feelings better than words ever could. When I'm improvising, the world fades away. Sometimes, 1 get caught up in the notes that I am playing, and might go through ten or twenty minutes of “practicing" until I find a couple new licks. Then, satisfied with my progress having been made, 1 let go. Entirely. I fall down into the bottomless void, eyes The Behrend Beacon I 5 music we had to listen to to be popular or any other form of high-school drama that you can think of. Relationships, appearance. "A" plusses. sports, etc. All that stuff just sort of came to us as we laughed and had a good time. We found out more about ourselves in one seemingly eventless weekend, than any of the “Kens" and "Barbies" knew about each other. That was a little off topic but neces sary in bringing me back to my original point. In college., those "classes" in high school merge together in a way and stereotypes turn to grey areas. Opening your ears to voices is the only true happiness that I can think of. Expressing an opinion and listening to an opinion, as well, is what makes my day great. Now. imagine if your opinion was returned and you found similarity in an opinion proposed to you. Isn't that the greatest feeling ever. 1 Meeting someone who feels the same about things that you do and completely understands you is unexplainable in words. Even further, imagine that that person is a girl - or a guy for all the girls reading this and every moment spent with them was awesome, even when one of you was mad or depressed. Then, watch that person in a relation ship with someone else. It's close to the worst feeling I can imagine. You imme diately know that this guy - or girl - doesn't know her - or him - like you do, and the gate opens and you're thrust skull first into the "friend zone". The gate locks behind you. and there's noth ing left to do but bang your head through the days. I know that a certain amount of confidence and a w ill to fight for her is supposed to be what I'm feel ing. but 1 think that that encompasses selfishness at its worst. After all this time, if she wanted it to move to a rela tionship it would've happened by now. and I'm not willing to intrude because it could ultimately turn our friendship to dust before my eyes. Someone once told me that things aren't complicated until people make them that way. Well, true love stands outside the box of that statement in its own sort of cosmithe friend /one shut, gasping for breath between thirty second long licks that are like ice water splashed on my face at 4 in the morning. The lights may all be on in the room, but to me, the darkness envelops me as the entire world becomes a nasty distraction to my inner bliss. Later, my eyes might be red or sore because I shut them so tightly, clinging like a child to his moth er to the peace 1 accomplish while I lose myself to the music. Looks are not important while this happens. I bend my knees any way I can: lean forward, then back: drop to the floor; rotate my saxophone while bend ing a note. I do whatever feels right, and only because it feels right. Did a janitor come in to see who was playing, or was the door just slightly more ajar due to the drafts inside the empty halls of the build ing? It doesn't matter. I could have been playing in Hein/ Hall and 1 wouldn't have known anyone was there. I would n't have known I was there. It sounds cliche, but the saxophone becomes a part of me, a second tongue that 1 use to speak a language which only those like me understand. My lungs are the first part of the saxophone, my throat the sec ond. then my lips and tongue lead into the mouthpiece, the third part, past the keys, the fourth, and out of the bell, the fifth. I am one moving, synchronized instrument of pain, pleasure, sacrifice, and glory for my own three minutes of darkness. That's my drink So. cheers.
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