I The Behrend Beacon How to speak Pittsburghese The language department at Penn State Behiend olleis courses in the Spanish, German, and French. The one language that it lack'* is the most spoken one on campus. If you are a Behrend student, odds are you came liom. live vv nh. 01 are friends with someone from the great city ot Pittsburgh. The Steel City has many distinct features, such as sandwiches topped with coleslaw and French fries, or the meeting of three rivers around the city. Now, being from Pittsburgh could mean that >ou actually live at least an hour and half away in any direction. The one thing that real ly sets the city apart from anywhere else is its own dialect. Since our language department does not oiler any onuses on the subject, this is, in no particular' order, an introduction to know mg and understanding Pittsburghese. The word “worsh” comes to mind. While at first it may sound like a type of soup from the old country, it is actually the Pitisbuigh wool for “wash.” Before you eat you must worsh your hands hehue going out, or even worsh a load of laundry. Uffctff Of yoove er/ee. owes fiiJG you TPt Most? ' AuSo Picfcie Puss, TU)nd*te Toe?, Arop GCAvy goy. Also 816 HotJtee., £urreQ.&ALi. > Top five of the week... With Halloween weekend just days away, it is time to make a final decision on a cos- foe \ I tume. This is why I have come up with 5. That ghost costume that you’ve been wearing since the sixth grade. It was scary then, but miy comes down to your thigh. . A Wino. We know that you have a binge irinking problem already; you don’t need to roll around in the trash from Dobbins as well. mjr \[ 3. A giant microwavable burrito. It's scary, but not in the same way that you should be ig for. 1. The Grim Steeper. A man in a black cloak making tea —.won’t send chills down anyone’s spine. 1. Female Costumes that are “Naughty”. I enjoy seeing these as much as the next guy, but there really needs to be a limit. I mean, do we really need to see someone dressed as a“Sexy Lunch Lady?” By Ben Raymond humor editor /iV, (-'(Vai.Lgt UAr'tfi.v'CVs'v I N- ' C C f ) V - Cfcul-ifJA. J j, v -x- ( \ f c-toofus, ) iCj Xg.,t\ / 6>UT THt OJW NWV.f- X / -tviat has HtR Ato uv) ) ( &CTVt€R€t> MG '.S j \oumPtcoc*c Soir. / 11 J v y\ *U? ri v By Brad Kovalcik stall writer The Top 5 Worst Costume Ideas Ne\i up is the woid "saminich." This is easily the food known as i sandwich Apparently the thought of having stmd in ones food was mappealmg. So the N and I) were replaced by two M’s. Who would- n't v. mi in eat something that has "minin'' in it? See also “sammige.’ I he phrase redd up" is a fun one to impress people with. It means t > ei .-an o; straighten things up. How it became "redd up," the world ua\ nc\ cr know (lie ol the most common is the question, “djeatyet?” One word. Inn a lull question. Il someone slings this at you. they just want to I now if mi have eaten yet. It also implies that they would like you to come eat with them. .Acceptable responses to this are, “nodju” - no. did you. or even "nadjyel." - not yet. If you do accept an invita tion io eat vou could even suggest going "dantan" or downtown. Bemrmlvt to pronounce these words exactly the way they look. The iesN D's v oii use and the mote you mix words together, the easier it w ill he to communicate. II s■ Hi are in a hurry you could use words such as “comere" (not Spanish:, "gahed" or "gedhat." One v oid that is not regionally specific to Pittsburgh, but is widely used iiieie is "crick." Translated, it means creek. It is a small body of runimu' water. It is a crucial part to many ecosystems. “Crick” is not 01006 ( I'VE St: 6M OU.cC' A Pi<in ea:x,. J \ c\w Pi;d '.• i- w o'O ',-rt. J A- \ \ / \ f Amp A / C.ACc.fc SToPPC-3, J v A *X> Schnjc'2.2C>LA. } IP 7 '' r-"'--' uck BviT ; / r *1 lot so much now that it k JwllWn - - 'A /. » ‘ - i * all pictures by Ben Kaymom Top of the muffin to you By Emily Zimmerman contributing writer '['here is a raging epidemic on the campus at Penn State Behrend. Muffins are appearing everywhere, and I am not talking about the delightful morning treat. No, I am talking about the unattractive bulge around the waist, caused by obsessively tight pants, But that is not the only fashion mistake many students are making. There are many others which will be addressed here, Men and women are finding themselves vic tims of this un-tasteful way of dressing; however, women are the most common offenders. The the ories I have developed include: - the freshmen 15 (or 50) was too much to han dle for the small budget of the college student - complete ignorance of the entire situation - the lack of a mirror - fear of a larger size -the girls simply find ALL curves attractive No matter which theory fits the individual offenders, the problem is there are perfectly attractive females flaunting what they should hide beneath clothing. The muffin offenders, for example, are wearing not only obsessively tight pants; they often wear shirts that are too small as well. This provides a view of both the muffin and stretch marks. I am only asking why these girls subject themselves, for any reason at all, to accentuating the least attractive part of their body. Another muffin mistake made by many fash ion- pushing-muffin-bearers is the belt over the shirt. This look is fashionable and cute for those who have the ability to dress the part. However, for those who are muffining, and then putting a belt on over the shirt, it looks like a flood gate >. **«*_ “V* The world around you By Ben Raymond humor editor Yoko Ono has filed a lawsuit over the royalty dues from her late husband John Lennon’s music. Even years after his death, she’s still doing her best to annoy everyone. Apparently Madonna and husband Guy Richie have been taking adoption advice from Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Brangelina’s next couple to give advice t 0... the Osbournes. Greek Week was this week on campus. Who knew? Wednesday night, a new episode of South Park aired. The story was about a teacher having physical relations with her student. Niiice! The United States population reached 300,000,000. And the lines at Disney World got longer. Everyone’s favorite celebri-tramp Paris Hilton is said to have tried to remove herself from the most recent National Lampoon movie, citing that she was embarrassed of it. This just in, Hilton may actually have morals. In a press conference, boxer Mike Tyson announced that he would like to fight women in the future. Finally, spousal abuse will have it’s a real word. It has been used to describe sore necks. ( i.e. I have a crick in my neck.) Rubber bands are known as “gum bands." If it were made of gum then it would be for chewing. It’s made of rubber and it is a band. There's no need to reinvent the wheel on this one. The food, “dippy eggs" may came up. Just leave this one alone. With all of the rainy weather lately you may hear people saying that it is “slippy" outside. You may want to try saying slippery. The col lege to the south of us is not called Slippy Rock. Don’t forget to drink your “melk." You know the stuff that comes out of cows’ udders and what cheese is made of. There are countless other words that the fine people of Pittsburgh have come up with to describe everyday objects and activities. Not everyone from the area uses the language, but a good portion have a few of the words tucked away in their vocabulary. To have new words like that widely accepted is a great achievement, unlike the residents of Philadelphia, who often refer to their city as “fluffy” and when asked about prices respond with phrases like “fie dolla.” So to all "yinz" who may have been “ignernt” “befur,” “gah aht” into the world and spread the word about "Pixburg.” Oh yea, Go Stillers! holding back tl pouring fat. One the most distui ing fashion mi takes that can made, in n opinion, is ta, ing a perfect good fashion at putting it on ti wrong body. It like a girl wi hips wearing skinny jeans, or one with large breasts wearing an obscenely low dropping top. It just should not be done. The next mistake made by many is wearing ultra low rise pants causing the "coin-slot effect.” Pants need to cover your booty crack. There are many other different rises to fit your body type. Nobody, and I mean nobody, wants to see a lit tle crack above the jean line every time you sit down in Bruno’s - it just is not appetizing. A lit tle hint for you: longer shirts are in style at the moment, invest in a couple, layer them, and cover the crack, please. The last issue I am going to attempt to address is by quoting my dear friend Nicole Rafle, "Spandex is a privilege, not a right.” Simply meaning not everyone is desirable in spandex. One way to judge this is, if you see your cellulite dimples, take a moment and allow yourself to accept that spandex is just not right for you. Muffins belong in the bakery, coin-slots at the casinos, and mirrors are needed back in the bed rooms of the Behrend College students. Country singer Sara Evans dropped out of the reality television show, Dancing with the Stars due to marital problems. On the plus side, she now has material for her next three albums. During the Miami football game this past weekend, a fight erupted among the players, in which 13 players were suspended. Miami ana lyst Lamar Thomas was fired for making inap propriate comments while the scuffle was hap pening. Thomas is using the Mel Gibson defense and claims that it was not his fault due to alco holism. Katie Holmes... just as crazy as Tom With the first snowfall of the year last week end, area businesses have already started prepar ing for winter. Juliette’s announced they’ve added heated poles. And finally, rapper Jay-Z is featured in new television advertisements for Budweiser. When asked about the situation, Jay responded by say ing that he’s got 99 bottles, but Cristal ain’t one "Think you've got o better punchlir Wont to fix a previous piece or o V*r*m? Then emofl m* at Friday, October 20, 2006 Hmily Zimmerman/ THE BEHRENI) BEACON /11 0 ,N ie r 017 t AP,e Mike Sharke'
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers