"1 THE FOREST REPUBLICAN Ii pobliilwd every WdUj, by J. 2. WENK. Om3 In Smonrbongh & Co.'m Building KUt STREET, TIONE8TA, Pa, Term, . . . tl.so per Year. No onbKrlptlnna received for a shorter period thn tun c mouth. r OorrmpoiKlenre tallclterl from all parte f the montry. No notice will be taken of aaonrmoin rxwuujualcationa. RATES OF ADVERTISING. One Bqnare, one Ineh, one Insertion t 1 00 One Bqnare, one ln(h, ene month S AO dne Square, one lnrh, tlireo months, OS One Square, one Inch, one year , ja M Two ."qtmrro, one ycir II SO (Junrler Column, one year. . (0 00 Half Column, one year .a.......... M SO Ono Column, one year 10 K I.rgat advertisements ten conn er line .each In icrtlon. Marriage snd death notices cutis. All bills for yearly adverUometa eMpcted qnar. tirly. Temporary adrerliaemeata must be ta in advance. Job work each od dellverr. (0 VOL. XVIII. NO. 7. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, JUNE 3. 1885. $1,50 PER ANNUM. (1. il t S "VANITY OF VANITIES," "Vanity of Vanities;" tho world is full of iln, The pot of evil boiling all the time; Tl big man and tlie litUo man In breathless haste to win Hisengle or liia dollar or Ills dime; And yet though o'er thli desert waste the winds of evil lilow, Xlmne'B many a cheerful glimmer shining out above the anow. A thousand traps and pitfalls He about us every day, Temptations and iloluslnns by the score; The nabob In his solOsbneaa rolls by us on th8 way, The poor man often bangs bis cottage door; Ai yet thoro's compensation. Every clumsy mortal whines, Who grasps a hornot by its sting or hedgehog by iu spines. Amid the selfish thousands there are hundreds true and kind, With many noble features that redeem; The roughest ore has value If It be bnt well refined, And men are mostly better than they seem; If looking out for brambles you are sure to Una their darts; rVrhaps you'll be as lucky If you closely look for hearts. For aftor all is uttered, we but find that which wo sack, The searcher after weaknesses will find; CiLUk'i),aiid you'll wonder at the kind words mortals spent, Tfo beauties have a message for the blind ; The world is but a mirror, and within our neighbor's face We see our soul rcfloctcd In its ugliness or grace "Vanity of Vanities,1 the world is full of ain. But also full of sunshine and of flowers; The man who works for happiness its smilo will surely win, The man who seeks shall find his sunny hours; Bo thrust the little barriers of its selfishness aside, And find tLe hidden blessings lying under all V ,- its pride; The lud -is .always somewhere, and the good old worldwide. . Kdgar Jnes, in the Current, OLIVE'S ADVENTURE. "But I don't bcliovo any ono would take the trouble- to molest us!" said Mr. log, moss-f ringed and odorous of the scented dead leaves, among whic it had lain all tbo autumn time, upon the. blazing fire. " In the first place, we've pot nothing to steal and in the second place, if we were all murdered, I can't see any particular good it would do any body. So I calculate we may sleep quietly in our beds." "Yes but, father," said Mrs. Jayncs ford, with an anxious look (she was a modern Martha, cumbered with many cares, this angular, hard-working, yel-low-fuced farmer's wife) ; ' I really think you ought to get an extra bolt on the back door, and I novcr did think a hook and staple was a safo thing for the little hall door. If there is a gang of burg lars and murderers going through the country " And Olive Morrison, the little lame school-mistress, who happened that week to be " boarding " at Farmer Jaynes ford's, moved her scat instinctively closer into the angle of the chimney corner, and lifted a pair of large, gray, startled eyes toward the good-humored face of her host. "Fiddlesticks 1" ejaculated Mr. Jaynes ford, "I keep a loaded rifle and old Towscr has a throat like a trumpet, and I guess if they come here they'll clear out again pretty quick. Anyway I'm not afcared of em." "There is such a thing as foolhardi ness, Jothnm!" said his wife, sentcn liously, as the stirred the batter for the morning's gnddlo-cakes in a squat stono jar with high-shouldered handles on cither sido. Olive Morison went to lier room that night, in fear and trembling, after hav ing set up by the family lire as long ns she could possibly find any excuso for so sitting up and lingering. She was a soft-eyed, rosy-complexioned littlo thing, with a tender, tuneful voice a girl who would have been very beauti ful, were it not for tho paralysis of one limb, which made it necessary for her to walk with a crutch, and somewhat dwarfed her natural height. Every body liked Olive. The parsimonious opened their hands to her simple needs the churlish grew almost courteous the hard hearted in stinctively softened, and those who be lieved in the hopeless depravity of hu man nature, made au exception in favor of Olive Morison. Even tho riotous, rebellious young horde of tho district school were inoro malleable, by far. under her gentle rule than they had been under-that of the male teacher, who had just resigned his position in de spair. As she stood before the glass unbraid iug the brown, shin ng Mrands of her long and luxuriant hair, Mrs. Jaynesford looked into the room. "It's a sharp, frosty night.Miss Olive," sho said; "hadn't you belter have an extry comfortable on your bed?" "I don't think J need it, -Mrs. Jaynes ford," said the girl. 'lint do do you really think there is auy danger uf our being robbed and murdered V" "I only know what I've heard, there belli' a gang o' lawless fellers in the country,".Mrn. Jayne-ifoni added, with a sort of gloomy satisfaction iu tho pros ect. "Aiid I don't know why they fchouldn't come here us well asanv place; tain't likely they know we hain't no silver, and Jotham keeps all his money in the county bank. Towser's all very well, but I've heard o' better dogs than he is, bein' settled by a dose of poison, nd I'd like to know what good Joth nm's loaded rillc's goin' to do us, artcr he's had his throat cut from car to car in his sleep!" J'Oh, Mrs. Jaynesford 1" shuddered Olivo, the brush falling from her nervous fingers I "I can't stny alone to-night will you send Bessie in to sleep wilh me? " But in spite of little Bessie Jayncs ford'g peaceful breathing at her side. Olivo could not go to sleep until mid night, and when at last a few snatches of capricious slumber visited her eyelids, it was embittered by frightful dreams of black crape-mnsked burglars standing at her bedside, nnd pistols presented close to her eyebrows. "Pshaw!" said Olivo to herself next morning, as sho viewed her pale face and swollen eyes. "Ism a goose and I'll boone no longer. What could any ono gain by hurting apoor lame girl like me." 1 don't believe there are any burglars around and if there should bo, I don't believe they will como to Farmer Jaynes ford's." But the walk was long and lonely, and when Olive reached the fallen tree, just beyond the rocky spring, where the school children always stopped to drink, she sat down on the trunk of a fallen tree, to rest a littlo, ere pursuing tho re mainder of her weary way. As bIio did so, tho sound of human voices reached her car the grulT, low voices of two men talking by tho spring beyond. Olive's heart stood still, ns sho suspended her breath, in order to listen! Who could they be? What were they doing there at that hour? Should sho scream and fly, or should she trust to her dark dress and tho obscurity of tho twilight to screen her from dis covery? Sho chose tho latter alternative, and shrank further into tho deep shadow of the witherod beech copse. "A brown house," said one man, " with a big chimbley in the middle and a new stun wall round it I tell ycr you can't miss it." A now chill of terror crept through Olive's veins as she recognized the de scription of tho Jnynesfords' farmhouse. "And how the plague are wo to get iu without rousin' the house?" retorted tho second man, rather harsher and more grating than the first. "He told me. Thar ain't no fastonin but a hasp on tho shed door it's easy lifted with a bit of crooked wire. We can slip in when they'ro asleep, an' whew, the thing's done in a minute!" "I don't believe in no such way of goin' to work as that," growled the sec oud man. "What would you do? Go round to the front door nnd rouse 'cm all up! Pshaw, Jim, you're a deal too soft hearted, aud that's what I've always said !" "I don't like the job, anyhow," sul lenly retorted tho other man. "it's soon over," was tho indifferent reply, "and whero's the odds? Ain't it all tho same a hundred years from now? Pooh, Jim, I didn't 'spose you was such a soft-stomached Miss Nancv of a fel ler!" "I ain't no wuss than anybody else!" growled Jim, "but I'm human, and I've a little gal of my own to home, no big ger than Javnesford's littlo Bessie, and" The Jaynesfords heard her tale with breathless horror and dismay. "I knowed it!" cried Mrs. Jaynesford, with prophetic unction. "I "told you how it would be all along, Jotham, but ye wouldn't listen to mel I'm a woman, and women ain't worth pay in' no 'ten tionto!" "But I don't see what it is they're arter!" honest Jotham cried, scratching the bristly black curls of his round pate. "Anyhow, I'll stnd over for Deacon Donley's two sons and Joseph Pncker, and we'll give them a good old-fashioned welcome, let thorn come how and when thev may. You say there are only two of 'em, Miss Olive;" "I only heard two of them talking," said Olive, "but thero may have been a dozen for what I know." "I guess we can manage 'cm," said hopeful Jotham, taking down tho gun from its two hooks over the stono chim ney piece and beginning leisurely to in spect it. "Forewarned is forearmed, they say, and I've al'ays found thero was a good deal o solid truth in them old proverbs my gran'ther used to quote 1" Evidently there was no sleep for tho Jaynesford family that night. All hands silently made their arrangements for a vigil. "We must kindle up the fire and put out the lights, as usual, at 0 o'clock," said Jothnm. "Father," pleaded littlo Bessie, "can I bring my two pet lambs in out of the shed?" "Nonsense, child, nonsense," said Jo tham. But ho did not further object, and Bessie mado a bed for the two pets in the shaving basket iu the coi ner of tho roomy old kitchen, greatly to their mu tual content. Airs. Jaynesford sat knitting gloomily; if she had been told that the world was to come to au end wilhln the next twenty-four hours, sho would still have taken up her knitting and Olive and Be-sie nestled close to her side, while Jotham paced thoughtfully up and down hc lloor, waiting for tho arrival of tho aux iliaries tor whom he hud already dis patched a messenger. The clock hud just struck 8. when u brisk knock cniuu to the door every one started as if the simple sound had . been a trumpet of doom. "Don't open the door, Jothum!" gasped Mrs. Jaynesford. but Jotham jjrew back the bolt nevertheless. "It's some neighbor," said he. "Wy, Jim Ellison and Jake Bleeker! I'm right down glad to see ye! Besie. run right down-stairs, an' draw a pitcher of cider, and bring up some o' mother's fresh doughnuts 1" As tho visitor returned their host's cordial greeting, Olive uttered a loud cry: "Tho men tho men I heard talking by the spring!" sho gasped feebly. "Oh, .Mr. Jaynesford, turn them from your door they are robbers and murderers!" "Eh!" cried Jotham. "Jim and Jake robbers and murderers! I guess not, Miss Olive." "Let them answer for thcmsolves." cried Olive, hysterically. "What bloody deed is it from which one of them re coiled, but which the other said would 'soon bo over?' What was tho plot to gain secret admittance through tho shed door? What " The taller and stouter of tho two strangers shook with peal after peal of noiseless laughter. "I'll tell ye what 'twas, miss, before tho littlo gal comes back," ho said, in the gruff, husky voice that had so terri fied Olive Morison by tho twilight spring. "I said then 'twns an ugly job, and won't say no less now. Jaynesford, he sold me them lambs o' his little gals. I drive a meat cart, miss and he told mo to come on the sly and get 'cm away, for she was dretful fond ov 'em. So when we come to-night, and found they wasn't in tho outshed, says I to Jake Bleeker, says I: "We've jes' got to go nn' ask up nn' down for 'cm; sol knocked, an' here we bo." "Is that all?" sighed Olive, with a faco of inexpressible relief. "Oh, I have been terrified." And she broke into hysteric laughter, whilo Mrs. Jaynesford sat by, half disap pointed that thero had been no mortal peril after all. So faded away the only appearance of danger that molested tho quiet Western vale, and that was tho last the Jaynes ford family ever heard of robbers, bur glars, and murderers. But Mrs. Jaynesford had bought a big box-lock, and allixed it to the shed door, and takes great delight in ceremo niously locking it every night of her life. "You can't bo too careful!" says Mrs. Jaynesford. Custer's Confederate Friend. The Seventh cavalry were sent to guard the engineers of the Northern Pa cific whilo they surveyed the route to the Y'eliowstone. This party of citizens joined the command a few days out from Forth Bice. General Custer wrote me that he was lying on the buffalo robe in his tent, resting after tho march, when he heard a voice outside asking the sen tinel "which was General Custer's tent." Tho general called out: "Halloo, old fellow ! I haven't heard that voice in thirteen years, but I know it. Come in and welcome!" General Kosser walked in, nnd such a reunion as we ha5 1 These two had been classmates and warm friends at West Point, and parted with sorrow when General Bosscr went into the Southern army. Afterward they had fought each other in the Sher.nndoah valley time and timo again. Both of them lay on the robe for hours talking over the campaign in Virginia. In the varying fortunes of war sometimes ono had got possession of tho wagon train belonging to tho other. I knew of several occasions when they had captured each other's headquarters wngon, with their private luggage. If one drove the other back in retreat, be fore he went into camp he wrote a note addressing tho other as '.'Dear friend," aud saying, "You may have made mo take a few steps this way to-day, but I'll bo even with you to-morrow. Pleaso accept my good wishes and this littlo gift." These notes and presents wero left nt the house of some Southern woman as they retreated out of tho village. Once General Custer took all of his fiiend's luggage and found in it a new uniform coat of Confederate gray. Ho wrote a humorous letter that night thank ing General Rosser for setting him up in so many now things, but audaciously asking him if he "would direct his tailor to make the coat tails of his ucxt uniform a littlo shorter," as there was a difference in tho height of the two men. General Custer captured his herd of cattle at one timo, but he was so hotly pursued by General Rosser that he had dismounted, cut a whip, nnd drovo them himself until the" were secured. Boots and Hud dles, by ElUaMh II. Custer. A Butter Test. "By that means I convince my cus tomers that I don't sell oleomargarine," said a while-aproned buttcrman, point ing to two china sauce-boats that stood in a conspicuous place on his counter in the Farmers' market. In each sauce-boat lay a little coil of common lampwick, one end of which hung out of the nose of the vessel. " Now," said the dealer, pointing to two firkins, "one of those contains oleomurgaiino made in Connecticut and tho other holds salt packed butter from Ohio. See if you can detect the genuine from the imita tion." Tho reporter tried and failed. In flavor, smell and appearance they were identical. The butterman continued: "That oleo margarine will deceive nine buyers out of ten, but I will expose it for you." lie dropped a lump of tho oleomargarine us large as un egg into a tin cup, and iu an other cup he placed a similar-sized piece of the salt-packed. The cups were held over a blazing little charcoal furnace un til their contents were melted. Then the oleomargarine was poured in ono sauce boat and the butter into the other. The wicks were lighted. Both burned readi ly, and the miming butter Kent up a faint and pleasant smoke. From the oleomargarine, however, came the nasty aud unmistakable stench of bunrng rancid grease. "Since I begun showing he difference between butter nnd oleo liiurgariue,"eaiil the dealer, as ho suutled out tho wicks, "my business Lai doubled. "PkUadt,lphit Tim . MAPLE SUGAR MAKERS. THE STJGAK CAMP TEARS AGO AUD AT PRESENT. Old Anil v Prorer noerrlbrd IlfifkttroniM fun In nrmer Time Curion Thins; Abont Nap. A New York commission merchant said to a Times reporter: "Tho art of making maplo sugar has greatly im proved everywhere within tho past few years. In the early days tapping a maple tree was simply tho cutting in it with an axe, a foot and a half above the ground, aslopingnotch three inchesdecp at tho bottom, which was scooped out into a miniature trough. As the notch filled with sap it was ladled out. By this means of procuring tho sap much of it was wasted, and then the augur hole and the hollow piece of elder camo into use. It is not many years ago since any one walking through a sugar bush in tho Rap-running season could see the sap dripping through these cider tubes into rude troughs mado by hollowing out with an axe a piece of log split in half, and holding three or four gallons. In the sap dead flies, bees, leaves, and twigs were always to be seen floating, and in the removal of these more or less sap was wasted. In the dayg of the elder and the wooden trough, the sap was carried to the old timo boiling kettles, which were usually the ones used in the periodical soap-makings. These were hung over fires built on tho ground and thus the sap while boiling was ex posed again to all kinds of foreign sub stances. Tho manner of hanging these kettles was peculiar, and I know of many old farmers who make sugar simply for their own household use who stick to the old crane and kettle still. In hanging a kettle a tall, slim tree would be selected and cut four or five live feet from the ground. It was then trimmed of its branches and a hole bored through its butt end large enough to admit a strong wooden pin. This pin was then driven into tho top of the stump, and the trunk of the tree could be swung around at will. The kettle was hung on this crane over the fire, and, when it was necessary, was swung aside to make it convenient for further operations. Tho sap was carried in from tho trees in pails, borne by yokes across the shoulders not only of rustic swain9 but maiden9 as well, for sugar making in the old days was a gala time and always looked forward to with joy by young and old, although it meant weeks of tho hardest drudgery. "The sugar camp was tho place for love making and all kinds of backwoods fun. Then, more than under the present system, it was frequently necessary, when the sap was running free, to boil all night. The grove, lighted up by many fires and peopled with many flitting forms of merry girls and lusty farm lads, pre sented a picturesque scene. On such occasion the country fiddler added the charm of his presence, and every moment that could be snatched from attention to tree and kettle was spent in hilarious devotion to dances whose graceful figures have long since been forgotten. It was very important to keep a close watch on tho boiling kettles, for tho sap was liable to boil over. Sometimes, even by tho most violent and persistent stirring of the seething sweetness, the watcher was not able to stay this inclination, and in such cmerirenciosapieceof fat pork was always kept handy to throw into the ris ing sap. This would instantly nllay the trouble in tho kettle bv break i nf the rapidly forming bubbles by some action which 1 never quite understood. "It would not do to leave the san long without stirring, for there was danger of scorching nnd certainty of its getting too thick. The work of stirring a lureu kettle could only be done by a strong person, and he required frequent lelicf. There was always some ono of long ex perience in sugar making, generally a woman, who was the tester of a camp. Sho went from kettle to kettle, carrying a gourd dipper half full of Ban or water. Dipping a spoonful of the boiling syrup! from a kettle she threw it in the gourd and judged by its action whether it had reached the graining stage, or that ap- proacn to it wnen tno tires should bo lowered, if not extinquished. When all was ready tho syrup was turned off and the sugar run into well-gi eased pans, cups, bowls aud dishes of all shapes and sizes. "Hut a sugar camp nowadays, while il is a cheerful and hospitable place to visit, is vastly different from what it was in our grandfathers' days. There is no more boxing of trees, the elder 6tick has disappeared, and the wooden trough is never found in a well-regulated sugar bush. A small metal spile driven into a small auger hole now conducts tho sap into tightly covered tin buckets. There are no insects or dirt to bo taken from j the sap when it is carried to tho cvap- i orating pans, und none is wasted. The evaporating pan. which has taken tho place of the old kettle, is a broad, shal low pun. ,i)uui in an arciieu lurnace, ami j sheltered by a close building. The sap ; uu ui mu un uuu .ui- lows devious furrows or passages in tho bottom of the pnn. liy the time it roaches the end of these tho sugar has been de posited und the sap flows out at the lower end of the pun us maple syrup. When this cools it is placed in the pan again, after struining, unci beaten eggs and milk added to it. The heat is gradually increased, and tho egr9 and milk thicken and collect tho impurities, und ull rise to the 6urfaco, when they aro readily re moved in a body. When this syrup runs off the process of 'sugaring off' is com pleted, and the pugar is simply pluced in molds and is icady for market. "There are many curious things about sap. It will not run lreely unless there are mingled conditions of heat, cold and light. Sap runs best with u still, dry, dense atmosphere, and when there is a north or west wiud. A frozen soil. thawing through the day and hardening nain at night, nnd plenty of snow in tho woods makes tho best weather for sap. The more oxygen there is in the air the better sap will run. If there comes a heavy snowstorm during sap weather, with a freeze following it, and then a thaw, tho sugarinakcr may expect the best possible run of sap. Trees do not want to be close together to secure a good flow, and hence the anomaly in sugar making that a few trees may be more productive than a good many. Sap that runs at night will make more sugar than the same quantity running by day and also when it is caught near a snowstorm or a freeze. It is hold by many sugar makers that sap is better when trees grow in dry soil, are tapped on the south side, and when the tap is mado high. Difference in quality of sugar, therefore, is duo in a great measure to soil and lo cation of trees, and to climatic and meteorological conditions. Care and cleanliness in manufacture may make up, however, for deficiencies in other requi sites. Herat. The city is situated at four miles' dis tance from hills on the north, and twelve miles from those which run south of it. The space between the hills is one beautiful extent of little fortified villages, gardens, vineyards and corn-fields, and this rich scene is brightened by many small streams of shining water, which cut the plain in all directions. A dam is thrown across the Heri Rud, and its waters, being turned into many canals, and are so conducted over the vale of Herat that every part of it is watered. Varieties of the most delicious fruits are grown in the valley, and they are sold cheaper than at Mashad. The necessaries of life are plentiful and cheap, and the bread anb. water ef Herat are a proverb for their excel lence. Of the inhabitants of tho place Vambrery gives the following descrip tion: "The eye is bewildered by the diversity of races Afghans, Indians, Tartars, Turcomans, Persians and Jews. Tho Afghan parades about either in his national costume, consisting of a long shirt, drawers and dirty linen clothes, or in in his military undress; and here his favorite garment is the red English coat, from which even in his sleep he will not part. , He throws it on over his shirt while he sets on his head the pic turesque Indo-Afghan turban. Others again and these are the beau monde aro wont to assume a half-Persian cos tume. Weapons are borne by all. Rarely does any one, whether civil or military, enter tho bazar without his sword and shield. To be quite a la mode one must tfarry about quite an ar senal, consisting of two pistols, a sword, pointed handyar, gun and shield. With the wild, martial-looking Afghan, we can only compare the Turcoman-like Jamshidi. The wretchedly-dressed He rati, the Ilazara, the Timuri of the vicin ity are overlooked whe.i tho Afghan is present. Ho encounters around him nothing but abject humility, but never was a ruler or conqueror so detested as is the Afghan by the Hcratis." London Timet. Lower California Tidbits. In a letter from Mulcge, Lower Cali fornia, to the New York Hun, Fannio B. Ward says: Tho other day Betsy and I were entertained at an exceedingly swell banquet at the house of a wealthy pearl merchant. Among tbo numerous courses of the dinner wnrn Knmn pnnrmnna nnnila i which had been fattened for Lenten food, as is the custom also in somo parts ; of southern Europe. Tho snails are j kept in largo reservoirs, the floors of I which are strewn with herbs aud llow- ers. uououess me iasniou was uorroweu from tho luxurious Romans, who, if we may believo Varro, fed them on bran uud wine till sometimes a single shell would contain ten quarts I But that course remained untasted, despito our utmost efforts to do as the Romans do. At a later stago of tho banquet two ser vants appeared 8ta"sroriu:r under the I weight of a huge mangrove branch, laden with iwrasiiic ovsters. This was placed in the center of the festive board. Each little bivalve, moored by threads of its own spinning, clung so tenaciously that a hammer was needed to displace it. This circumstance aroused our interest in the oyster family, and determined us to cultivate their acquaintance. Tho parasitical or tree oyster is as common here us in tho Indian sens, and looks so exactly like a dried leaf us to deceive even the fisher birds that seek it. It is found attached to tho roots aud branches of tho mangrove tree, which grows in sheltered bays at tho edge of tho sea. These odorous groves look like marine forests, their lofty branches dipping tho waves during high tido. A Japanese Postman. As in America, so in Japan, tho post ! man wears his uniform. It consists of a suit of blue cloih, a wide butter-bowl hut und straw bhoes. The mail bag swings under his arm, oris pushed alonir .n a utile two-wheeled curt. Ho is al ways running or trotting ulong. You know that in Japan men do nearly all the work that we make horses do here, j so you see the Japanese postman carry, i hasten along from station to station, j traveling on a quick run mile after mile, up-hill, dow n dale, never stopping until I he reaches the pluce where another post i man is wuitiug to receive the mail uud lun on with t iu his turn. So the mail curried in tho greater part of the Jupau- e-e Empire. To a f nlaces reached by '. steamers it trav; in the United States. e . In a small ITT .O f Grass Valley.saya a ban iTaiianJ " cr, tho leaves and l.'ru.i j bark of thuiST tf - tree are success fully used Su ? .0 leather. The tannery is expenr'J'r on native barks aud trees. W JLOVE EONO OF THE TOM-TIT. The most successful, and certainly the prettiest, song in the new comic opera, "The Mikado," is tlie love song of the tom-tit. It has already bocome popular, and Its refrain has become a catch phrase. Tho song runs: On a tree by a river a little tom-tit Rang "Willow, titwillow, titwillowl" And I said to him, "Dicky bird, why do you sit (Singing 'Willow, titwillow, titwillowr ts it weakness of intelloct, birdyj" I cried, "Or a rather tough worm in your little in sider' With a shake of his poor little head, he re plied: "Oh willow, titwillow, titwUlowJ'' He slapped at his chest, a? he sat on that bough, Singing "Willow, titwillow, titwillow!" And a cold perspiration bespangled bis brow, Oh willow, titwillow, titwillowl Me sobbed and be sighed, aud a gurgle her gave, rhon he threw himself into the billowy wave, And an echo arose from the suicide's grave "Oh willow, titwillow, titwillowl" Now I feci as sure as I'm sure that my name Isn't Willow, titwillow, titwillow, That 'twas blighted affection that nuula him exclaim "Oil willow, titwillow, titwillowl" And if you remain callous and obdurate, I Shall perish as he did, and you will know why, Though I probably shall not exclaim as I die, "Oh willow, titwillow, tit willow l" IIUM0U OF THE DAT. Bad habits Worn-out garments. ' A railroad strike A collision. Ex. ' A roller-skater is known by his bumps. Sallie Ratus is the girl that takes the biscuit. l'he Hatchet. The wife's pathway in life is generally a buy way. Boston Post. When a stovepipe is out at the elbow the soot begins to play out. In Denmark "the rooms in the hotel are all bald-headed that kis, they have no locks. Sifting t. Would it be just to say that all physi cians partially get .their living by pill age? The Judge. According to the doctrine of the sur vival of the fittest, the last man will un doubtedly be a tailor. Life. Often a cold shoulder pleases the recip ient, especially if it happens te bo a cold shoulder of lamb. Waterloo Observer. The empress of Austria has a private circus. Many American ladies have them to on lodge nights. Courier-Journal. A poetess sings, " I Have Found What Silence Is." Her friends, it is understood, are not so fortunate. Boston Transcript. "More light" is tho watchword of progress, but more of tho opposite quality in a load of coal is what the people are beginning to demand. Chi cago Ledntr. "What is the 'dollar of our daddies'!" asked a college paper. It is what the average undergraduato pays his wagors and anti-temperance subscriptions with. Burlington Free Press. " What One Girl Did " i3 tho title of a new story. She doubtless did the same as all other girls do jump up on a table and frightened a poor littlo mouse to death. JS'ew York Journal. A philosopher writes, "Mun is the merriest species of the creation." Did the philosopher ever see a man when it was first broken to him that ho was the father of twins? We trow not. New York Graphic. "How Love is Made in Persia," is the title of n recent nrticle. It is probably made there of the same compound parts as hero, that is, millionaire's daughter ono part, Impecunious nobleman one part, desire for title forty-nine parts, de sire for wealth forty-nine parts. Mix. Boston Pott. "Sis says she can't como down to night: she has a severe headache. That's what sho says; but Cholly don't give It away, she's lyin' like a houso afire. She hurt her bunion so tryin' to wear num ber two shoes on a number four foot, that sho can't walk," was the way a Fourth street eight-year-old excused his sister when hor beau called. Brooklyn Times. A sporting paper contayis an article entitled "How to prevent nccidents in the gamo of baseball." This ditliculty may bo overcome by the substitution of garden digging for baseball. A young man who is digging garden never gets injured by running the bases or by the bat flying out of unother player's hand; though when he gets through with the gumo ho may be iiiducod to think he has exchanged backs with a man ono hun dred aud uinety-scveu years old. Nor ristown Herald. "The spring has sprung again, sir, Ami I liuva brung sir," Said he, "soiiie litilu verselets that the whole world would like to read. I know you'd prize thorn, You'd better rovisa them In an idlu hour I dashed them oft at almost lightning speed." A jourualmtie Encounter listie Then ensued, ami, crash! the rxxt whirled dow nstairs and through tlie door. The bright vv""K writor Was not a ft.;liter, Hut he'd oftou tlu-tiid oif poets at almost lightning 8(eed btilore. SumerviHt Journal. There are 13ti,0()(i II hermeti iu France, and about four lishuniieu out of every 1,000 are drowned every year. Over 3,000 children recently died ia th Fiji Islands of w hooping cough. The uiulady has be some epidemic.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers