THE TIMES, NEW BLOOM FIELD, PA., MAItCH 25, 1879. Brother Diamond's Persecutions. IY NAME'S de Rev. James Dla. mnud, from do Bouth, thank you, eah I" Bald a man coneplcuous for bis black face and gloves and his white neckcloth, as lie put down his hat and cane and seated himself for a long call. The merchant who was writing at his desk was well known and highly hon ored In both business and religious cir cles. He looked up from a letter he was writing, bowed civilly, and asked : What can I do for you V" ' Well, sah, I's heerd dat you's one o' dem faithful servants, data alius watuhln' for work, and saying, Speak, Lord, for dy servant heareth.' " " Well, I'm waiting to 'her' now," said said the gentleman, with a smile and a glance that read the applicant's very heart. " Well, sah, I'se de pasture of a large and flourishing church away down Bouth. We's bulldln' an edifice dat'll be a honor to de 'nomination. We's got de whole frame up, but dere Isn't no ruff nor t-ldin' to keep out de storms ; so we can't worship none, 'less our bredren helps to finish it up." " Let tne see your credentials," said the benevolent man. The reverend gentleman handed out two greasy letters, badly written, hor ribly spelt, and dated eighteen months back. " Where is your church ?" asked the .merchant. "All long de banks o' de great Tedee I mean the Tomblghee River ; 'scuse me, sah," was the reply. " What's the name of the place ?" "Isn't no place In pertlculer, sah: it's all bush, and de people rush from far and near to hear me day all says I preaches powerful." - "Glvenie the name of the nearest ministers to you, who know you." " Oh, sah,'tain't no use you writln' to dem. Dey's Presbyterians and Tlsco lalers, and hasn't no interest in my views I My bredren dat kn ows me, root and branch, and dat 'ceives de money I c'lect, Is de best ones; and here's dere testimony." "Who knows you at the North V" " Rev. Mr. K., and other clargy who lielp me raise de money I got in I'hel delphy." " I will write to Mr. K.,and if he says jrou are all right, we will give you a lift here." " Better not do dat, brudder, he's got sorter prejudiced agin me, kase on ac count of what my enemies down home lias writ him. You know, sah, dat de righteous will have persecutions in dis world, I's got 'em, sure," ejaculated the sable brother, adding : " When I was a field hand I had a disease what dey calls 'chrony lethergy,' and 'peared like I couldn't work, no how. But de oversee was bound that I should work, wheder or no. " So he put on de lash powerful. I noticed dat he never troubled Sim, who was one o' de deacons ; and I think if I's made a deacon he wouldn't have de face to lick me. You know, sah, he dat de sires a good work ; so I put to, power ful, in de meetin's, so I 'sprised every body dat know me. Dey said I could be heard shout In' a whoje mile off. ft I hadn't more'n been made a deacon when de parsecutors come 'long ; and dey say : " Heie, you's a fine deacon, a stealln' o' turkeys and bins !' "Now, sah, some o' dese feathered radlvldooals had walked some way into my coop, dat I'd hid up outo'dey're sight under a heap of brush ; and I con fess it did look rayther 'spicious for a deacon ; so, not wantin' to hurt de cause, I jus' tuk 'em, head and heels,and push 'em into ole Tobey's coop every body knowed he was a bin-thief, and catchln' a dozen more thar wouldn't make him so 1" " Well, soon arter dat I had a call to de ministry. Fust it come in a dream a voice saying: "'Go preach, go preach I' Den I hear it in de wind and in the pine boughs; nex,' when I lay 'wake medl Utiu' in my cabin, I hears all de bull frogs in de swamp hollerin' : " 4 Go preach I go preach I go preach I go preach I"' . . To add force to the subject, the rev erend gentleman rose, leaned forward, puffed out his cheeks and chest, and im tated the attitude as well as the deep guttural notes of the bullfrogs who were sent with his call to the holy office. " I kep' telllu' my bredren, but dey wouldn't believe me till a ole sister o' great 'ligion had a special vision, and see me rldin' seven war bosses to once, wid banners o' victory fiyln' over me, den dey give me a chance to try de log meetln'-'us in de swamp. "Well, I come down on deir sins powerful, till dey shuck in deir shoes, and sconscience tuk hold on some on 'era wid slch a grib dat dey went offinto awooneses. "But dere was-one powerful bright inulattoo fellow dar, who never see no visions, nor dreamed no dreams, nor see no lights. 'Peared like de devil got Into him dat night to upset the work. He step forward, and says he to me : " 'Better look to your own sins, and ax Is a man wid two wives lit to preach de gospel V' " Dat ar killed the spirit V de meet In'! All of a sudden my sconscience wasrowged up; and quick's I'd an nounced de benediction, I rush to de cabin where my fust wife live de old one, de mother o' my chll'ii. She was Blttln' dar wid her boys like she was In innocent of all sin ; she wrs was a poor, miserable, wrinkled old creeter, any way I " I kotch her by de hayr and pitched her heels over head out of doors, and yell arter her : " ' What sort of a woman is you,llvin' wid another woman's husban, and hurt ing of de cause you p'oll'esses to love 1' " Den de boys go out and pick her up and fotch her in ; and den dey takes up de parsecutlon agin me. Dey give me a awful licking ; and de mnssa he was on'ligious, of course told me nex' day, dat If dey hadn't done It good he'd a' made de oversee' do it 1 And so right long de devil has kept up persecutions to make me quit preaching. But here I be!" "How long have you been collecting for your church '("' asked the astonished gentleman. " Eighteen months, sah. I's had a long, weary tramp on't; but then we mus' b'ar do cross, if we would w'ar de decrown." " How much have you collected ?" asked the gentleman. " Nine hundred dollars, Bah ?" " How much of It have you sent homey" "Every blessed cent, sah, 'cept just' ba'rly enough to feed and clothe and travel me ; and yet de ongrateful cre turesin de church keeps seudln' gru ni hil n letters,and 'peacliin' my honor,and parsecutin' of me in glneral." " How much money have you actual ly sent homey" " Every cent 'cept what I told you, sah." "How much Istlnity Now answer me, truly," said the gentleman, reso lutely. "Well, sah," replied Brother Dia mond the holy rapture suddenly . for saking him, and his upturned eyes full ing meekly down "I's sent back in clear money 'sides lots o' promises seventeen dollars and fifty ents and dat'le buy a heep o' lumber, you know, sah!" " Yes ; I thought you were the fellow I heard of in Philadelphia Bwindling churches. Now leave this office, take off that cravat and those gloves, and go to some honest work to earn your bread. If I ever hear of your trying to collect another dollar this way, I'll hand you over to the police," said the indignant merchant. Before this speech was ended, the Rev. Mr. Diamond, minus glove and cane, was performing a plantation quick step down the street ; his 'nomination was never appealed to aid the church in that uncertain locality, " 'long de Great Pedee or Tomhlgbee, or thar- abouts." The moral is, that it is just as Import ant for Christians to give wisely, as to give generously. Otherwise they may encourage both Idleness and im pudence in an unworthy applicant. Congregationalist . Gets Some Trouble. " T AD man he svlndle me, Shudge 1 J B'help me, Moses I He svindle me!" said the excited descendant of Isaao to Judge Morgan, yesterday morning. "How did he do that, Mr. Wolfin skiy" asked the Court. "I vill tell all about de plzness, Shudge. You see dot feller, Mans- mttiin, of Tenth avenue, came de audra day to mein shtore in Chatham street, und he say to me, "Yacob, fix me dot suit of close for ochtsene tollare,' und, such Ich, 'Mansmann, dot is verth more as ochtsene tollares but du beist mein freeund, so take it along niit you.' Veil, Shudge, dot feller he try on dem close und dey vas a leetlcr too loose in de pants dack und goat sleeves ; so sacht Ich, "Mansmann, I fix dem for you und I bring dem bei your house on 10th avenue.' Veil, I do dis und I go bel Mansmann's seln house gestern abend mid dot suit of close, und he try dem on und dey lit shust like a glove. I tell you he wos glead. I bet you. Und sacht er bel mlr, 'Yacob, you're a pully poy, I bet you! Take eln glass beir'i" Den I say, 'Plzluess first und beir after.' Den he pay for dot suit o'close. Den we trink dree, four, coople glass o'beir, yaw! yaw ! Und Mansmann sacht, 'You got blenty dime Yacob. Let us play pinagle.' Veil, ve do dis. De limit vas eln tollar a game. lean play pinagle pooty veil, I bet you ! Never have I see off mein life enny man he beat me a square game. So I vas not 'frald for Mansmann. But, Bhudge, he don't blay a square game. He beat me more as ochtsene dimes, und vln back all dot money vat heglf me for dot suit of close. Vat shall I do now y He got dot money for It too. Oohl Dersvindler !" hissed the irate Hebrew to the Innocent look ing Mansmann, who stood at the bar In the guise of a prisoner. . "Well, Mr. Wolflnskl, didn't Mr. Mansmann pay you $18 for the clothes before you began to play V" said tlie Judge. . "Yaw! Dotlshso! But he vln It all back und I got noting; no does; no money!" "Didn't you play to keep what you won y" said the Court. "Dot's so! But T don't vln some dings!" "That's it. You lost. Now I think you had better go home or you '11 loose your Thanksgiving goose. Next case. Yacob stood like one In a dream for a minute. But when he realized that Mansmann was actually leaving the Jefferson Market Court a free man pos sessed of a suit of clothes which had cost him nothing, heexcluimed bitterly : " Veil, s'help me gracious, I don't can tlnk I was avake. Him got mein goods ! Dot's so! Und him got mein guelt! Dot's so ! Yacob, dot's besser you go ing home und ask your vlfe if you vas a yackass mil long ears !" A Young Man's Mistake. A YOUNG man from one of the back towns came In to buy a present for his girl one day lust week. His wonder, ing gaze being transfixed by the gro tesque display in one of the dry goods windows, he entered the store and bash fully Btepped up to the pretty young lady behind the counter: " How much are those y" he Inquired, pointing at a pair of niekle-plated gar ters in the window. " Seventy-five cents," the lady re plied, sweetly, handing out the article in question, and blushing slightly. " I think they are kinder pretty ,don't you y" Inquired the young man,anxious for somebody else's opinion. " Very," replied the young miss ; " they are the latest style." Everybody wears them, don't they V continued the young man. "Almost everybody," replied the young ludy, affecting an unconcerned air. " I was going to git them for a girl that I know," said the young man, somewhat nervously. "Do you think she would like them V " I should think she might I don't know," returned the young lady, blush ing again. 1 " Well, I don't hardly know myself," said the young man, taking up one of the dainty artloles and examining it closely. "You don't suppose, they are too large, now, do you 'i"' " Why, I I" stammered the young lady, the blush growing deeper. " They seem sorter big like," contin ued the young man, not observing her confusion; " but, of course, I wouldn't be certain. She's middlln' size, but not very fat, and mebbe these would be a lit tle too loose. I Bhould think she was just about your bigness, and of course if these would fit you they'd fit her. Now just suppose you try them on, and If" "Sir!" exclaimed the young lady be hind the counter, in an awful voice, that lifted the young man's hat on the end -of his hair, "you are insulting!" and she swept away to the end of the store, leav ing the bewildered young man standing in dumb amazement, holding in his hands what he thought wag a beautiful pair of bracelets. And when one of the men clerks came and explained his mistake, the young man from the back town struck a bee line for his team, and In a very brief space of time was tearing toward home at a rate that threatened to Irretrievably ruin the lamily horse. He won't buy any more braclets until he is mar ried. WhaMsTrfdlum? TUB question is plain, though it Is novel. Iridium is metal which, in combination with platinum, is said to have enabled Mr. Edison to overcome most if not all the difficulties which pre sented themselves in the way of elec tric lighting. Iridium is one of the eleven noble metuls the others being mercury, silver, gold, platinum, palla dium, ruthenium, rhodium, osmium and indium the characteristics of the no ble metals being that their oxides are re duced by heat. Iridium forms three oxides, which pans readily into one another, and thus occasion the various tints which the solution of its salts as sume. From these tints the name of Iridium, derived from Iris, the rainbow, was given to this metal, which is very little known to the non-scientific. It is very hard, brittle and. white metal, only occasionally found in a pure form in the Urallau ores of plantium, , in this country and in the mountain ous range which separates European from Asiatic Russia, and is usually com bined with osmium as an alloy in flat scales, and was disco vered in 1803 by Smlthson Tenuant, who, at the same time, first revealed osmium. It may be melted by the oxyhydrogen blow pipe, or by the heat of a voltaic current, and Its Isolated form Is unacted upon by any acid not even by Aqua Regta, though as an alloy It dissolves In Aqualtegla, to which it derives Us literal name, " Royal Water," because It dissolves gold (which the alchemists and old chemists called " theklngof the metals"), and Is usually a mixture of one part of nltrlo ncld to two parts hydrochloric acid. Inasmuch as Iridium Is declared to be Indispensable to Mr. Edison's success, it Is of Interest, not to say of Import ance, to know what manner of metal this is. One thing appears certain. That the difficulty of obtaining an abundant Bupply of iridium, for eleotrlo light or any other scientific purpose, may be formidable. A Touohlng Little Story. A story conies from St.Petersburg which is pretty enough to bear repeating. Not long since a Government functionary died in utter destitution, leaving with out friends or "relatives two small children. One of them was a boy seven years old. Alone, moneyless, foodless, with his little sister crying for bread, he wrote on a piece of paper as a last resort the petition : "Please. God, send me three copecks to buy my little sister aroll." This he carried to the nearest church to drop it Into an alms box and start it on its way to heaven. A passing priest seeing him trying to put the pa per in the box took it and read it, where upon he carried the children to his house, fed them and clothed them. The next Sunday he preached a sermon on charity in which he alluded to the inci dent. The collection that followed amounted to nearly $1,000. Account of an Interview Between Madam De Stael and Bonaparte. She began by pouring forth the most emphatic compliments, to which he replied coldly, but politely. Without heeding the reserve Madam De Stael persevered, General, Bald she "which is the woman yon could love most?" "My wife, madam," was his reply, "of course," she answered ; "but which could you esteem the mosty" "She who best attends to her domestlo duties," answered Napoleon. I can understand that persevered the lady, "but which woman would be the best thought of by you." "She who produces most chil dren," replied Napoleon and bowing left the circle. She turned to M. Arnault and said; "Your , great man, is a very strange man." What Is an Editor? Josh Billings says : " An editor is a male whose business it is to navigate a nuzepaper. He writes out editorials, grinds out poetry, inserts deaths and wedins, sorts out manuscrips, keeps a waste basket, blows up the prlnter,steals matter, fitea uther people's battles, sells his paper for a dollar and fifty cents a year, takes white beans, poor wood, (100 feet to the cord) for pay when he can, raizes a large family, works 19 hours out of twenty-four, knows no Sunday' gits abused bl everybody and once In a while wipt bi somebody, lives poor, dies middle-aged, and often broken-hearted, leves no money, and Is rewarded for a life of toil with a free obituary notice In the nuzepapers." Curious Comments by a Judge. Justice Maude once addressed a phe nomenon of innocence in a smock-frock in the following words: "Prisoner at the bar, your counsel thinks you innocent; the counsel for the prosecution thinks you innocent; I think you innocent. But a jury, men of your own country men, in the exercise of such common sense as they possess, which does not seem to be much, have found you 'guil ty;' and it remains that I should pass upon you the sentence of law. That sentence is that you be kept in im prisonment for one day; and, as that day was yesterday, you may now go about your business." The unfortunate rus tic, rather scared, went about his busi ness, but thought that law was an un commonly puzzling thing. A Poor Bargain. An intemperate ne'er-do-well was per Buaded by a sharp man of business to turn some property he held over to him, in consideration of receiving two suits of clothes every year, and an allowance of twelve shillings a week so long as he lived, his speculative benefactor calcu lating the dissipated rascal would soon drink himself to death. He was doom ed to be grievously disappointed. As soon as the agreement was signed, seal and delivered, the wily fellow forswore intoxicants, and lived respectably to a ripe old age, leaving the bargain-monger, and his trustees after him, with a bal ance, so fur as that speculation went, very much on the wrong side of the ledger. DR. WIIITTIER, No. 003 Penn Street, Pittsburgh, Pa., Continues to alt'.rd reliable special treatment of I-rlvalH and Urinary Diseases, f'erfeci cure guaranteed, flpermalorrhoea or Seminal Weak iiessresultinRfr"in self-abuse or s. xual ejeets. producing nervous debility. mKi,t eml8ilons.de. spondeney, dl-r.liiess, dlinuess ol niufit. pimples of the face, weakness ol mind and body, and finally Impotoncy, losso! sexual power, sterility, etc., iinllltiiig the victim for marriage ,,r bos ness and lenderUm life miserable, are permanently f.,!rfl Jl . "'"test possible time Uoiiorrheas. Gleet, RtrlotHres.al Urinary dleaes and Hyphl lis. (all form, eonsls Ing of Mkin Eruptions. Ul cers In the mouth, throat, or on other partsof the body, are perfectly cured, and the brood polsoa thoroughly eradicated from the ayilnm; - IK. Will ITIKR Is regular graduate of medicine, as his diploma at olllce snows; Ms life Ion- siwclal experience In all private diseases, with pureft in diclne prepared byhlmseir, enable him to curedltlloiilt cases arter others' fall it Is sell-evident that a physician treating thousands oi case, ever year acquire great skill. The establish ment Is central and retired, aud so arranged that patients see the doctor only. Consultation and correspondence private aud free, f'amphleisseut Sealed for stump. Medicines sent every here. Hours 9 A. M to 4 1. M., and 1 P. M.. fo 8 P M. Hundavs from 10 A. M., to 1 P. M. Everybody ahould read the MARRIAUE AND HEALTH GUIDE, 144 pages, line Illustrations price an cents. A uook forprlvtta.caref.il radlng by both sexes, married or single, explaining wonders and mys teries of sexual system! reproduction, marriage Impediments, etc.. caues. consequence and cure. Hold at onice or by mall, sent securely sealed, on receipt oi price In money or postage stamps. Ad dress iDlf WillTTIKK, No.4l2 1'enu St.. Pitts burgh, Pa. - W 46 ly J. M. Gibvin. J. II. Gmvi.i. J. M. GIRVIN & SON., FLOUR, GRAIN, SEED k PRODUCE Commission Merchants, No. 64 Sonlh .'ay, St., BALTIMORE, MD. We will pay strict attention to the sale of all kinds of Country Produce aud remit the amounts promptly. 4s ivr. J. M. GIRVIN & SON. EWATlKINO'g (1878 Uniform Copyrighted 1877) The Latest and Best. A Great Improvement a want supplied. We furnish low and whatever you need. Law aud Ctmmoreial Supplies or all Kinds. fiend for samples and price lists of what you want. WCatalgues of Blanks furnished at THIS OFFICE, or direct from the publisher. E. WAKING, Tyrone, Pa. jsjpw wagon snor7 THE undersigned having opened a WHEELWRIGHT SHOP, IN NEW BLOOMFIELD, are now prepared to do any kind of work In their line In any style, at prices which cannot lail to give satisfaction. Carriages of all styles built and all work will be warranted. . . 8TOCFFER & CRIST. New Bloomtleld, April 23, 187 USSER & ALLEN CENTRAL STORE NEWPORT, PENN'A. Now offer the public A RARE AND ELEGANT ASSORTMENT OF DRESS GOODS Consisting sf all shades suitable fortne season. BLACK ALPACCAS AND Mourning Goods A SPECIALITY. BLEACHED AND UNBLEACHED MUSLINS, AT VARIOUS PRICES. AN ENDLESS SELECTION OF PRINTS! We sell and do keep a good quality of SUGARS, COFFEES & SYRUPS, And everything under the head of GROCERIES ! Machine Needles and oil for all makes o Machines. To be convinced that our goods are CHEAP AS THE CHEAPEST, IS TO CALL AND EXAMINE STOCK. - 49 No trouble to show goods. Don't forget the CENTRAL STORE, Newport, Perry County, Pa; WHEN FEVER AND AGUE, MALARIA, AND ALL FKVEK30AN BE Cl'UKD ITOIt fJO CENTS, It Is criminal to suffer. An absolute means of cure la found lu INFALLIABLE AGUE PILLS. THIS sped tic cures not only Chills and Fe vers, but every form ol Malarial taiut front Aching bones to the Khakes There Is no mistake about It. If you get the l ixht artiole. Kemember the name KHOLL'S AGUE FILLS. Rember the price FIFTY CENTS. It your druxKitt has none. I will send them by mall on receipt o! & cents, or I will send a box free to any person not able to pav tor them. Address JOSEl'H bHOLL, Burlington, New Jersey. Q
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