THE TIMES, NEW ULOOMFIELD, PA., MAlt 7, 1878. 'S RAILROADS. PHILADELPHIA AND READING R. R ARRANGEMENT OF r ASBENGKlt TRAINS. November fitli, 1877. TRAINS LEAVE H AKK1KBURG A8 FOLLOWS For New York, at 6.2(1, 8.10 a. m. 2.(X)p. m., and 7.tf p. in. Fnr Philadelphia, at 8.20, P. 10, 9.45 a.m. ami 3.S7 p. in. Knr Heading, at 6.2(1, 8.10, 9.45 a. m. and 2.00 3.57 and 7.f.5. . For Potlsvllle at 5.20. 8.10 a. m.. and 8.57 p. in., and via Schuylkill and Susquehanna Branch al 2.40 p. in. For Auburn via H. & 8. Br. at 5.10 a. in. For Allentown, at5.2U, 8.1ua. m., and at 2.00, 3.57 and 7.55 p.m. x , The 5.20, 8.10 a. m., 3.57 and 7.6o p. in., trains have through cars for New Vork. The 5.20, 8.10 a. m.. and 2.00 p.m., trains have through cars tor Philadelphia. SUNDAYS i For New York, at 6.2" a. in. For Allentown and Way Stations at 5.20 a.m. For Reading, Philadelphia and Way Statlonsat 1.45 p. in, TRAINS FOR II AHKT9BUUG, LEAVE AS FOL LOWS : Leave Now York, at 9.45 a. in., 1.00, 5.30nnd 7.45 p.m. . , Leave Philadelphia, at 9.15 a. m. 8.40, and ''?'eaVi RendlnR. at 1 1.40, 7.40, 11.20 a. in. 1.80, 0.15 and If. H'" p. in. , . . Leave Pottsvllle, at 6.10, 9.15 a.m. and 4 3o Au'd via Schuylkill and Susquehanna Hi audi at 8.15 a.m. Leave Auburn viaS. 8. Br. at 12 noon. Leave Allentown, al K30 5,50, .05a. in.. 12.15 4.30 and 9.0) p. in. SUNDAYS: Leave New York, at 5.30 p. in. Leave Philadelphia, at 7.S1U p. m. i Leave Heading, at 4.40, 7.40, a. in. aud 10.35 '''Leave Allentown, nt2 30 a. in., and 9.05 p. m. J. K. WOOTKN, Hen. Manager. O. O. Hancock, Ueueral Ticket Agent. tOoes not run on Mondays. Via Morris and Essex It. It. Pennsylvania K. It. Time Table. NEWPORT STATION. On and after Monday, June 25th, 1877, Pas teuger traloswlll run as follows: EAST. MIIIHntown Acc. 7.32 a. m., dally except Sunday. Johnstown Ex. 12.22 P. M., dally " Sunday Mall 6.54 p. h., dally exceptSuuday Atlantlo Express, 9.51p.m., Bag, dally. WEST. WayPass. 9.08 A. m., dally, Mall .2.43 p. m. dally exceptSunday. Miltlintown Acc. 6.55 P. M . dailyexcept Sunday. Pittsburgh Express, 11.571'. M., (Flag) daily, ex cept Sunday, racillo Express, 5.17 a. in., dally (nag) Trains are now run by Philadelphia time, which Is 13 minutes faster than Altooua time, aud 4 min utes slower than New York time. J.J. BAKOLAY, Agent. DUNCANNON 8TATION. On and after Monday, June 2ith, 1877, t rains wlllleave Duncannon, as follows : EASTWARD. Mlflllntown Acc. dally except Sundayat 8.12a. m. Johnstown Ex. 12.53P. M., dally except. Sunday. MailT.SO P. M ..." , " Atlantic Express 10.20 p. m., dally (flag) WESTWARD. Way Passenger, 8.38 A. M., dally Mall, 2.09 p. m dallyexceptSunday. Mlllllntown Acc. dally except Sunday at 6.10p.m. Pittsburg Ex. dally except Sunday (flag) 11.33P. M. WM. O. KING Agent. AND- FREE HOMES. The Kansas Pacific Homestead Is published by the Land Department of the Kan sas Pacitlo Railway Company, to supply the large and Increasing demand for Information respect ing KANSAS, and especially the magullicent body of lands granted by Congress in aid of the construction of Its road. This grant comprises OVER 5,000,000 Acres OF LAND, consisting of every odd section In each township, for a distance of twenty miles on both sides ot the road, or one-half of toe land In a belt of forty miles w ide, extending to Denver City, Colorado, thus forming a continuation of the belt of country which, lrom the Atlantic coast westward, Is found to be. in a climate, soil, aud every production of nature, the most favored. THE KANSAS PACIFIC IS 114 Miles the Shortcut Road from Kansas City to Denver. The favorite route of the tourist and the best line to the SAN JUAN COUNTRY. A copv of the' IIomeMend will be mailed free to any address, by applying to S. ,1. (ilLMOKE, V. K. CORN ELL, Land Commissioner. Gen'l Passenger Ag't. Baliua, Kans. Kansas City, Mo. March 5, Omo GOLD! 3 Great Chance to make money, ii you can i gei mom you can get Greenbacks. ., We need a person in EVERY TOWN to take subscriptions for the largest, cneapest and oesi illustrated family publication In the World. Any one ean become a successful agent. The most elegant works of art given free to subscrllMrs. The price is so low that almost everybody subscribes. One Airent reoortsmak ne over 8150 in a week. A lady agent reports taking over 400 subscribers In ten dvs. All who encnire make nionev fast. You can devote all your time to the business, or only your spare time. You need not beaway from home over night. Y'ou can do It as well others. Full particulars, directions and terms free. Ele gant and expensive Outllt free. If you want ? rentable work send us your address at once. t costs nothing to try the business. No cue who nganes fails to make great pay. Address "The People's Journal," Portland, Maine. Slwly "" A ril IjTVyHPG obtained for mediant X . Y. JL -Hi 1M X O cal devices, medical or other compounds, ormental designs, trad a marks, and labels. Caveats. Asslgnineu is, Int lferences, Milts lor infringements, and all cases arising un der the PATENT LAWS, promptly attended to. ivi:itiiovstiiat iiavkiii:i: REJECTED flee may stlli. In most cases, be patented by us. Being opposite the Patent Olliee. we can make closer searches, and ttecure Patents more promptly, and with broader claims, man muse who are remote irom wasu Ington. TXTTTlXTrp'Yn ri send us a mod II V Jll X UliO el or sketch of ' your device; we make examinations free of charge, ana aavise as i patentainill y. All cor resnondonce strictly contidential. Prices low, ana ru inAutia uisi.e,oo x-a.iji.jm 'l: KKIk. We refer to officials In the Patent Office, to our clients In every Slate of ilie t'uiou, and to your Senator and Representative In Congress. Special references gtveu wnuu aesirea. . Address: . C. A. SNOW it CO.. Opposite Patent Olll 'e, Washington LANNELB A splendid assortment of Flan uels,JU8t opened by x. muh imui T"RINTING of every description neatly ex X ecated at the Bloomfteld Time Office at reasonable rates. WHY HELEN FAINTED. MI88 HELEN. LOIUMEH dropped her liandkerchlef ; lttchard Warner picked up the dainty lace trifle and gave It back Into the little pink-gloved hand from which It bud slipped. In return for the service he received a Btnlle, a bow and a musical " Thank you." 1 A very flne-looklng fellow that young Warner don't you think so, Mr. Ktlckney 1"' she asked, arching her pret ty brows In a very patronizing manner, as her father's clerk passed. 'Passable," replied the young man addressed, lifting, with exquisite tact and grace, and cye-glaBS to the weakest of lila weak eyes, and scrutlzlng War- ner through It with one of those long Btares peculiar to some people. " But who Is ho?" Now Mr. Btiekney didn't ask the question for information. He knew, as well as he knew that the habit of wear ing No. 4 (ladles' size) gaiters was giving him Bonie most excruciating corns, that the gentleman about whom they were conversing was only a salaried clerk in the employ of his pretty companion's wealthy father. ' " Oh, he's nobody, to be sure! Hut father has some very eccentric notions, and insists upon our asking him to all our parties, as much ns though he were young lord." Mr. Warner bad made the circuit of the room again during this conversation and wns approaching the place where they stood this time with Miss Adelaide Lorimer on his arm. There couldn't have been a greater contrast had some little roseate morning cloud taken itlnto Its head to run away with Its grand father, the midnight, that there was be tween the above-named couple War ner, with his tail, proud figure, in the suit of well-worn, but glossy, black broadcloth ; his dark, handsome, man ly face and magnificent black eyes and Adelaide Blight, sylph-like; sunshine in her robes of some white gossamer fab ric, in her violet eyes, rose tinted cheeks and soft curls floating to her waist like a golden mist. They looked well together, neverthe less, and Miss Helen angrily bit a line of milky little teeth into the rose of her under lip on peeing them in each other's company, rsne hau been tulnking for the past few minutes what a nice person Mr. Warner would be to flirt with. She was tired of the yellow mustache, weak eyes and insipid gallantries of her de voted Augustus, and though Bbe intend ed in the course of time to become Mrs. Btiekney, unless some suitor with an ex tra thousand happened along, she could not see why for that reason she might not entertuin herself by breaking the' heart of her father's handsome clerk in the meantime. What right had Miss Adelaide to step In thus unceremoniously between her and her intended victim 1 It was down right mean, and she wouldn't submit to it. Somehow, by some careless motion of the lady's wrist, her jeweled fan was jostled from its place, and, sliding down her long Bkirt of rose-colored satin, fell directly at Mr. Warner's feet, as thut gentleman was passing. Of course - he could do no less than disengage his arm from his companion's and restore the misplaced article (Mr. Btiekney had turned his head for fear of an introduc tion), and of course he saw no attempt at fascination in the beaming glance with which MIbs Helen's superb eyes acknowledged the politeness. Of course, too, ho failed to be aware of any art In the way that charming young lady man aged to engage in a sentimental conver sation, or any coquettish manoeuvre in the skillful manner in which it came about that almost before he knew it, Miss Adelaide was promenading the room with Mr. Btiekney, and her haughty sis ter was clinging, a bewildering and af fable substitute, to the sleeve of bis plebeian coat. ' Perhaps, however, lie noticed the lit tle shadow of disappointment which flitted over Adelaide's pretty face, as the evening drew : to a close, and he found no chance to speak with her again. How could she know that it was not his Inclination, but Miss Helen, that held him captive! At any rate he muttered to himself In the solitude of his chamber that night. "How provoking it was ! Helen's face may have the more artistic beauty, but Adelaide's Is sweet as art angel's. I wonder when Lorimer Intends to raise my salary !" ' " " " ' ' At the same moment Miss Helen, languidly disrobing herself,!was remark ing, with a Wearisome yawn which stretched her little rose of a mouth to a width that m!ght: have surprised her delicate and fastidious 'Augustus, that " that Warner was a presuming fellow, and came near making love to her. Bbe would take him down a little, if she died for it. She did wish Btiekney would dye his mustache ;" 'while'' Adelaide, listen ing with burning cheeks, snuggled her golden head down deeper into' the great downy pillows, and let the embroidered s'keve of her night robe lall across her face In such a way as to conceal the sus picious glitter of something very like to tears on her silken lashes, and which made her blue eyes look like May violets after a dash of summer rain hag sprin kled the meadows, Mr. Itlchard Warner went tb the post office one morning and got a letter. A Very important looking document It was thick, awkward and with a foreign post-mark. He had only two corres pondents in the world hie mother and his cousin Lizzie. And he turned the strange epistle over two or three times In his hand before opening it, know ing that it pame from neither of them, and wondering where and who it could be from. He broke the seal In the street' ; read a few lines and turned white; a few more and turned red ; a few more and started on a dead run down the street, making be-crinollned ladles stare and bundle laden errand boys dodge ' one side; knocking the breath out of two or three corpulent gentlemen's bodies, and glv lug a broad leap over the back of an old apple-woman who Vas stooping by her fruit-stand td pick Up a Stray bit of change, atid who looked up just In sea son to sec the gentleman's undignified coat-tails fly like a pair of black wings around the corner. The next thing known of him he was standing in the counting-room of his employer, Mr. John Lorimer, panting, flushed, trembling trying to stammer out something, between laughter and tears, about giving tip his situation $100,000 old aunt East Indies dead left him heir, etc., etc. The amount of it was the poor clerk had suddenly become a rich man. But when he repeated his intentions of giv ing up his clerkship and entering into business for himself Mr. Lorimer de murred hesitated a moment slapped him on the shoulder called him a cap ital fellow (a facetious allusion to his un expected acquisition of capital probably) and offered him a partnership in the Arm of Lorimer & Co. Mr. Warner looked out of the window and whistled ; looked up at the celling and sighed ; down to the carpet and smiled; into Mr. Loinimer's face and blushed. " On one condition he would accede to Mr. Lorimer's proposal." " What was it 'r"' " That he should allow him to enter into two partnerships at the same time one mercantile, the other matrimonial one with himself, i. e., Mr. Lorimer, the other with Mr. L.'s daughter." " 'Twas agreed if the duughter had no objections. He meant Miss Helen, of course r1" "No, Adelaide." But he couldn't spare Adelaide. Sho was nothing but a child. Helen was just the right age to marry, and besides besides beside Mr. Lorimer stammeted there. He didn't like to say that Helen was twenty-four years old going on twenty -live and that he was anxious to get her married off. No, indeed ; that wouldn't do. He scratched his head and looked puzzled for a moment. His face bright ened all at once. He believed Adelaide was engaged to a young lawyer couldn't say certain. Mr. Warner needn't look so crestfallen. Helen wasn't engaged. Was certainly the handsomer of the two. Would make the best wife, he thought. Mr. Warner didn't think so, but was too polite to contradict. Hinted that Helen would not marry him. " Yes, she would." - " No, she wouldn't." " Try her and see." .. Mr. Warner did notiike to knew he should fall. A bright idea struck him all at once. " Might he have Adelaide if Helen wtfuld not marry him V "Yes." " And Mr. Lorimer wouldn't say any thing to Helen about his sudden in heritance t" . "No no." , . " He might go right up to the house and ask her, then 1"' "Hadn't ho better wait until after dinner?" Mr. L. thought so. " No he must go then. He shouldn't take any comfort until his mind was settled." "Well, run along then." Aud he did run along. And Mr. Lorimer, looking after him, rubbed his chin with the back of his hand In a dis concerted kind of a1 way, and muttered to himself : ' li What a deuce of a hurry the boy is in. The jade will refuse him as sure as the world and I shouldn't wonder if the both of them did. If he only hadn't made me promise not to say anything about his good fortune!" He Btood with a little vexed shadow on his face for a moment. Then another bright idea was born into his brain. 1 "But I didn't promise not to write anything about it,.lid.I! Ha, ha! John Lorimer, you're an old one. You'll fix it yet.-' " Heweuttohig desk and dashed off 'a few lines on paper, called his errand boy and put It In his hands. Miss Helen Lorimer's hour of triumph had arrived. Mr. Warner bad come to the house and asked for a private Inter view with her. Of course she knew what he had to say. She wouldn't be afraid to wager anything, from her new gold bracelets to her camel's-hair shawl (cost $'00) that he had come to ofTer himself. '" Wouldn't she wither him with her disdain the presuming beggar ? A servant came to the door and hand ed her a note, just as she was getting ready to descend to the 'parlor. Bbe glanced at It and threw it on the toilet table. "Father's handwriting. Shall have time enough to read It by and by ; but this fun is ton good to be delayed." Bbe swept down the stairs and Into the richly furnished drawing-room like a Princess. It was just as she expected. Mr. IUelmrd Warner made her a plump of fer his heart, hand and fortune, couch ing his proposal in words rather too cold to give her much of a triumph, and dwelling at much length on his pov erty. Hichard fidgeted uneasily in his chair during the moment of silence which fol lowed his offer. Poor fellow ! He began to be afraid she would accept him in spite of everything. But the lady's first words set him at rest on that score. "Bir, is it possible that you have mis understood my condescension in this way V You are very presumptious! My father shall hear of this, and I fear you will lose your situation. Bhall I call a servant to show you the door, or can you find it alone V" " Don't trouble yourself, Miss Lori mer. I beg leave to Inform you that it was your father's wishes and not my own that brought me here," replied Warner, with a smile so strange and Belf-possessed as to bewilder his compan ion. " Any information which you can give him will therefore be unnecessary, If I had not been sure what your answer would have been to my offer, I should never have made it, as nothing could be further from my real desire than to call you my wife. If you please, I will speak with Miss Adelaide a moment." With a blazing face, the baffled co quette left her unscathed victim and ran up to her room to drown in ft fpoA of angry tears the shame,mortification and wonder which her interview with War ner had occassioned. An hour luter, Adelaide, stealing In, blushing and happy, to tell of her be trothal to Richard Warner (for she, like the dear, true-hearted little girl she was, had accepted him in spite of his sup- posed poverty), found her just tearing open her father's note, and going up be- side her, leaning over her shoulder and the two sisters read together: Hklkx If Warner offers himself, ac cent him. He's just come into posses- sion of a splendid fortune. I've no time to explain. I shall take him in partner ship next week. Be sure and accept mm. ' lis me uesi matcn in lown. J. LOHI.MElt." P. S.-Old Stlckney has failed. Helen fuinted. How Lawyers Swear Off. t T SWOItE off once let me see yes X it was twenty-six years ago last first day of January, Church Blackburn and I swore off." Judge Cady pushed aside his judicial ermine, and, leaning his arm upon the desk, the tears welled up from his soul into his eyes as he pondered upon those happy days. "You see," pursued the Judge, forcing back the lump in his throat, "you see Church Blackburn and I were great friends. He had a, law office adjoining mine, and we were together a great deal Well, Church used to drink considerable and I used to take an occasional drop myself; so says I to him one 1st of Jan uary: "Church, says I, "lets swear off!" "Agreed!" says he,'" I've got sick of wearing this red nose of mine around town ; so let's quit this miserable drink lng and lead the virtuous lives of total- abstinence men." " Well, we swore off, and agreed that whichever one of us first broke the pledge should buy the other a suit of clothes. . " For six months I kept the pledge like a Spartan hero I never quailed be fore the blandishments of the white robed bartender, and Blackburn seemed to be doing well, too. We were together just as much as ever and I never caught him taking a dilnk in all that six months' time. Twice a day we used to go down to the Planters' House saloon and get a couple of big lemonades to cool our parched throats, and buow the lioys how true to our resolutions we were. , " Now, all this time Blackburn's nose was Just as red as ever, and I couldn't understand why this change of life shouldn't give it more of a tone of re pose. ' ' ' ' , ' " Well, one hot July afternoon we dropped In at the Planters' and ordered our big lemonades as usual. The bar tender fixed them up as usual ; but when I tasted of mine, I eplt it out quick-like and a shudder ran all over my body. " Look here," says I to the barkeeper, "you've put gin In this lemonade!" " Well, you never saw a man as seared as that iiartenuer was. lie looked at me and then at Blackburn, And then leaned up against the bar, pale fis a ghost and speechless ns a mummy. Blackburn turned red and white, and all sorts of colors at once. He tried to stammer out something, but failed igno- mlnlouely. "What does this mean V" I asked. " I gave you the wrong tumbler," faintly moaned the semi-comatose bar keeper. ' ' "Then Blackburn came out like a man, made a clean breast of it, and I could not help laughing when I heard how outrageously I had been duped. Why, for five long months, twice a day Black burn had been drinking gin and lem onade to my lemonade. He had made an arrangement with the barkeeper, and had guggled away, time and again, until at last, by some awkwardness, the bar keeper had given me Blackburn's gin Instead of my lemonade." Well, you got the suit of clothes V" Yes ; and Blackburn paid for them like a man. Humph I Ten o'clock! Call the court to order, Mr. Marshall." Our Guide's Story. HEltE is a snake story equal to the venerable one of the little girl and viper that ate their bread and milk together. " You think a snake has no mind of his own ?" said our guide who delight ed in a joke through the Blue Illdge lost summer. "You're mistaken. A black snake now keeps upa lot of think ing, and likes his joke. He's a con strictor, you know, and he knows as well as you do he can't hurt a flea by striking. "When the Yankee army was quar tered along hyar, before the s'render, that was quarter-master a New York fellow who was powerful afraid ol snakes. Comin' down yon hill with him one day, we passed a black racer full six feet long, taking his ease under a lg. " The nature of that snake Is to run If you look at him ; but he watched the Yank, and he meant to have his bit of fun out of him. He gave the fellow chase sir. He did I Seldom heard of such a thing afore 1 Down the mount ing went the quarter-master, yelling like mad, and after him went the snake his head straight up, lookln' frightful enough. When he gained on the man, he sprang on him, strikin', him on the neck precisely as if he had fangs. Play in' rattlesnake, yer see. Four times he did it, hitting the fat fellow sharp in the neck, and then the Yankee fell flat. , " I'm a dead man !" says he. " If you'll believe me, that black crit ter went off slow and cool, and wagged his tail as he went. He was secesh, yer see, and he'e had his joke." How a Horse Kept Warm. One morning Inst March,a well-known physician in Meriden, Conn., drove up to a house on Crown Street, let his horse standing in front of the door, and went in to visit a patient. The horse was one of those that could be trusted to stand without tying; but the weather being cold, he soon began to feel chilly. He stamped and pawed the ground, he moved this way and that, hoping every moment that his master would be ready to drive on. At last, feeling that he could not wait any longer without exercise, the horse started off at a brisk pace, toward Olive Street, When he had gone several rods, he turned the buggy round as neatly as though guided by a skilful driver, and trotted back to the standing-place. Here he stopped, and waited again full five minutes.. Then he trotted on sev eral rods towards Main Street, turned round as skilful as before, and in spite of a boy who tried to stop him, (fancy ing that he was a runaway), pranced back to his old station in front of the house, and waited " patiently for his master. When the doctor came out, there was the horse standing at the hitching-post, as demurely as though he had never thought of leaving it. This is a true story. A Sure Test. An agricultural paper gives several di rections " How to tell a good egg." They are not altogether satisfactory, however. The quickest and surest way to tell a good egg is to place it in one hand and smash it with the other. If an odor arises that leads you to believe that a bone boiling establishment and Liinburger cheese, factory have tele scoped, the egg is not good, and you want to throw it away and wash your hands. The method never falls.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers