" REG’LAR FELLERS
= ot ut 1
OWL LAFFS
A WISE OWL
A certain man not so far from
town was about to
father, The doctor came, went up-
stairs and soon asked for a small
screw driver, then a larger one,
then a small wrench, then the ice
tongs, each time making the trip
up and down stairs.
The father to be, getting very
impatient remarked: “What in
thunder are you doing with all
those tools? Tel] me, is it a boy or
become a
girl?”
The doctor replied: “How in
blazes do I know. Can't get my
d medicine case open.”
A fellow up at Florin told me
this one yesterday. One hot even-
ing last week his old maid neigh-
bor kneeled at the bed to say her |
and he heard her
¢
little prayer
wind up as follows:
send him back safe,
single.”
‘— and please
sound and
Since I'm on the subject I'll give
you this one poetically.
I stood at my window at midnight,
Staring thru the air.
When a comely maid,
Pulled down her shade
And left me standing there,
I saw an inscription on a tomb-
stone in the Mount Joy cemetery:
“Prepare for death
And Follow Me.”
Now tell me who on earth can
do that when you don’t know
which way he went!
Roy Sheetz tells this one about
his recent trip to the hospital.
The ward was full of ailing
The air was full of groaning
The doctor entered, full of fun
Good moaning, men, goed moaning,
men
In a recent divorce case at Lan-
caster a man said: “We
happy for a long time your Honor.
then — then a baby came.”
“Boy or girl,” said the Judge.
“Girl, a peach of a blonde, mov-
ed in next door to us.”
were
‘No daddy can be expected to
become elated over the facie that
baby is beginning to tal and
she insists on telling it to the
judge.
A local husband vows he'd pay
cash money to hear an argument
between his wife and one of those
tobacco auctioneers, He
can add my spouse to that, too.
—
I saw a car on Sunday with two
little signs set into the control
panel. On the left it said, Pilot,
and on the right Co-Pilot. On the
same car, on the left and right of
the rear bumper, was lettered:
“Passing Side” and “Suicide.” ——
—— Guess that motorist had
sompin! i FR
A lady on East Main Stg sab:
she finally broke her husband of
biting his nails, She hid
his teeth.
A few daffynitions from papers,
recently turned into our
teachers, included:
Pedestrian — A man whose wife
icck the car.
local
Blizzard — Part of what you
find in a fowl.
Minera] Wool — Shesrings
from a hydraulic ram.
Horse sense — Just stable
thinking.
No wonder the teachers insisted
on a pay raise.
Grandma Wize says the reason
the average girl would rather
have beauty than brains is be-
cause the average man can see
better than he can think!
Along with the story about ‘the
Scot who went outside of the
house on Christmas Eve, snd fired
a pistol, and went back in the
house, and told his children that
Santa Claus had just committed |
_ Suicide, belongs this one, about
A Ai a
SUPPOSE | WAS |
TO ASK YOu TO
LEND ME A DIME,
WHAT WOULD
High School Soccer | pi Ee
‘Team Wins Opener
Mount Joy High School opened
{ its soccer season with a decisive
| win over West Lampeter Tuesday,
{3 t00.
| Mt, Joy dented the goal
the
fee.
| first quarter and added two more
in
in both the third and fina] peftiods
to clinch the verdict. Rice, Linton,
| Max, Conner and Harple did the
Mt,
Sumpman
while
Miller
outstanding in their field play.
scoring,
John
Joy Lowell |
and were
Township
Manheim Boro dropped out
the league, leaving New Holland | S h | N 1
and Manor idle in the loop. C 00 Oo es
|
Mt. Joy Pos. W. Lampeter | (From page 1)
Stohler G Herr | Gettysburg College and formerly
Derr RF. Rhoads | ht in Claysburg. Pa
Metzler LF. Harnish | aude In Claysburg,
Sumpman R.H. Hess | Mr. John Evans is the new in-
Rice CH Werner | dustrial arts teacher who succeeds
| McGarvey LH. Lake | ppp. William Workman, who re-
{ Linton OR. Gochenauer | sition in. New
| Max LR. Scheaffer | signed to accept a position in New
Germer CF. Musser | Jersey. Mr. Evans is now a teacher
Shupp Y.-L. Neville | in Media, Pa.
by Feher | Miss Jean Sabo, girls physical
re erioas: |
Me Jovy 1 0 2 2—5 | education teacher, replaces Mrs.
W. Lampeter 0 0 0 0—9 | Elizabeth Shatz. She is a graduate
Cah 1 ~ >
_ Substitutes — Mt. Joy — Stary, | of Fast Stroudsburg Teachers Col-
Fitzkee, Martin, Miller, Brown, lose
Divet, Taylor, Harple, Cramer, B.| ‘¢5¢- ;
Bates, Brooks, Boyer and W. Bates. The school is entered in the
W. Lampeter Hackman, Hershey Lancaster County Soccer League.
and Duval.
Goals
Linton,
The team will be coached by Mr.
Robert Phillips of the faculty. The
schedule follows:
Mt. Joy — Rice, Max,
Conner and Harple,
East Hempfield Wins
Fast Hempfield exploded for all Sept. 30—At Mt. Joy.
five of its goals in the third quar- Oct. 7—New Holland, Home.
ter after East Donegal had taken Oct. 14—At Manheim.
a 1-0 lead in the second period. Oct. 21—W, Lampeter, Home,
Donegal got its final tally in the Oct. 28—At Manor.
third stanza, | The school is also entered in the
| Lancaster County Hockey League
and the team will be coached by
| Girls’ Hockey Miss Jean Sabo. The season opens
Sept. 23 when East Hempfield
Mount Joy high school girls’ visits East Donegal. The rest of
hockey team opened it’s second the schedule is:
year of organized play since 1941, Sept. 26—At Mt. Joy.
yith Miss Virginia Gorgodian as Oct. 3—Elizabethtown, Home,
coach. Oct. 3—At. Manheim,
The fellowing games are sched- Oct. 17—At East Hempfield.
uled for this season: At home — Oct, 22—Mt. Joy, Home.
Sept. 26, Fast Donegal; Oct. 8 East Oct. 24—At Elizabethtown,
Hempfield; Oct. 17, Elizabethtown: Nov. 5—Manheim, Home.
Oct. 24, Manheim, Away — Sept. The student council] was reor-
24 Elizabethtown; Oct. 3, Man- ganized by C. Arthur Hollinger,
heim; Oct. 22, Fast Donegal; Oct. | faculty sponsor, Lester Hawthorne
24, Fast Hempfield, is the new president. Raymond
All home games are played on Good was elected vice-president
the high school field at 4:00 pm. | and Patsy Waller, the new secre-
Included in the lineup are: tary-treasurer.
Captain, Phyllis Hoffman, center 0
forward; Joyce Ellis, left inner; FIELD HOCKEY NOTES
Marian Foerch, right inner;
Yvonne Schneider, right wing; Manor and Manin Township
Melissa Strickler, left ing Too registered victories in Section A,
Mumper, center halfback: Mary while Best Donegal ond Noun} Joy
Jane Krall, right halfback: bik the victors In fhe Section B
Dolores Miller, left * halfback; | > :
Dolores Wilson, right fullback; | Kosi Donegal banged pair (of
Joanne Kramer, left fullback: goals through in the first half to
{blank East Hempfield, 2-0.
: | Mc r used first h: ,
Substitutes Shirley Scho- | Mount Joy used first half goals by
field, Abedeen and Corrine Mark- | Joyce Ellis and Marian Foereh
ley, Peggy Zerphey, Bonnie Bigler, | to nose out Elizabethtown 2-1. Eliz-
abethtown got its goal in the second
Nancy Angstadt, goalie,
are:
and Jean Wagner,
: half a shot mai Jurko-
The manager is Maryanne Long; | ale on 2 shot by Romaine Yurk
assistant manager Nancy Brown.
Girls’ hockey is a fast, interest- | East Hempfield Pos. East Donegal
ing game, full of action as the , LW. Forman
1 : { Gingrich LI J. Waser
girls dribble, drive, scoop and Habecker CPF. Mattera
switch in their defensive and | Swarr RL G. Waser
offensive playing. | Zerphey RW. Fisher
Plan to attend these after school | Weaver : LH. Lindemuth
i > | Hauenstein R.H. S. Raber
games. They're open to the public. Forney LF T. Waller
The students and players invite | Edwards RF. Goss
and urge you to join the “rooters.” | Miller G. G. Raber
— ter | Score by Periods:
| Fas to ( ¢
Everybody reads newspapers buf | East Hempfield .......... 0 0-9
NOT everybody reads circular ad- | EAST DONEGAL ......... 2 0-2
Substitutes—E. Hempfield: Ben-
der. E. Donegal: Goss and Waller.
yoals—E. Donegal: Mattera and
S. Raber.
it RR ST
wvertising left on their door step.
the Scotchman who awoke in the
early morning hour and found his |
wife dead beside him in bed.
he and shouted Wis Second Annual
stairs to Bridget the cook: “Cook |
one egg this morning.”
rolled over,
Soap
only (From page 1)
: { ceed 12 inches,
With winter coming cn, just re-| Race will be run on the Market
is | Street hill.
member, boys, that a diplomat
a man who can make his wife be-| Cars are not to cost more than
lieve ‘she'd look fat in a fur coat. | £3.00 when built.
These are the major rules and
An attractive’ blonde, just a| are very simple to follow.
: SR nl - ¢
little fed up after six months of | The prizes will be: $1000 for
| ¢: om or
marriage complains that “A wedd- | first; $7.00 for second; $5.00 for
third and $3.00 for fourth.
So -come on boys and girls. Get
ing ring is like a tourniquet; it
stops your circulation.”
| started on those racers now. Last
a book des- |
prefab-
vear we had eight racers and this
vear we would like to have at least
bought
A fellow
cribingg the
inexpensive
ricated houses and became so fas-| twelve if possible, or even more.
inated with it that he finally or-| If you wish any further infor-
mail. Some | mation on the race or about the
dered a house by
weeks later he wrote
of protest to the manufacture.
cars, get in touch with Jos. Shaef-
W. Donegal Street, Mount
call 67W Mount Joy, Pa.
a bitter note |
His
a complete flop. An in-
fer, 327
Joy, or
house was
spector came to investigate and| Lets get started now.
: ; sea A
roared: “Why, you've put the |
whole thing upside down.” “Oh,|ON LEBANON VALLEY SQUAD
replied the man, “then that's why Marshall Gemberling, well
I keep falling off the porch.” known local athlete, is a member
of “The Flying Dutchmen,” :Leb- |
A number of Mt. Joy shoppers ancn Valley College's football
twenty-three
weighs
and is a Junior at College. |
Andy Kerr thinks Gember- |
good as he
“Marsh” is
years old, stands 6 ft. 4 in,
205
want to know — “With no ceiling | team
what does the cust hit when
he learns the new prices of meat,
butter, eggs, etc.?
Ibs.
nas
I guess that does it.
A WISE OWL) ket
A A Be ah oh
ast Donegal
ki
“VD SAY TH’
SAME THING
| SAID TO YAN
--
ABSOTIVELY
NOPE! NIX! NAH!
NOT A CHANST!
was THAT YOU
| ASKED YESTERDAY?
oP
BULLER’S BEAUTY SALON
MAIN STREET,
FLORIN, PA.
Specializing in
SCALP TREATMENTS CQLD WAVING
MACHINELESS PERMANENTS
MANICURING
SHAMPOO SETS
PHONE MOUNT JOY 153-J-5
Open Monday to Friday 9 a. m. to 8 p. m. Saturday 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.
FINGER WAVING
LOOK MODERN
Now In Mount Joy
Wertz Modern Dry Cleaning
35 WEST MARKET STREET
MARIETTA, PA.
Have done work in York and vicinity for past six years.
OUR OLD CUSTOMERS ARE PLEASED—LET US PLEASE YOU!
Ladies’ Dresses and Men's Suits
$1.
FOR PICK-UP AND DELIVERY
PHONE MARIETTA 3109
Clean all material you may have in your home
BE MODERN
00
CALL MODERN
| Have your saws filed by mnchine | gate, Tile
HUMMER
and Asbestos Roofing,
J. F.
Carpenters - Contractors
They cut cleaner, truer, better. Copper, Sheet Iron, Tin Spouting,
types, quicker service. Bring them Hot Air Heating, Ventilating,
to Suctign Fans, etc.
CHARLES ABEL oe
Milton Gfove, Pa. Office: 34 Detwiler Ave. Mt. Joy
Phone: Mt. Joy 129R12 7-31-f Phone 209-R
7-17-tf
Everybody In This Locality Reads The Bulletin
MARIETTA
uonsccus CARNIVAL
SATURDAY EVENING, SEPT. 27, 1947
MARIETTA WAR MEMORIAL PARK
6:45 P. M.
TRAINED DOG ACT BY PENNA. STATE POLICE
ELMER McLAIN AND MYRTLE
MARIETTA YOUTH BAND
REFRESIIMENTS
CHILDREN FREE
TEN PRIZES
FREE PARKING
GAMES RIDES
ADULTS DONATION 25¢
Open Meeting
To All Residents of
FLORIN & COMMUNITY
FLORIN HALL
MONDAY, SEPT. 29, 1947
7:20 P. My
692 2451
LEAGUE STANDING
Team WwW. LL
Corll ..............s 15-5
Good: ............... SR
Barnhart ........... 11:9
Tronic 11 9
Shonk ........00 10 10
Kreider .............. 9 11
Spangler ............. TB 3
Frey 4 16. .200
HS, Tronio, 247; H.S.T., Shonk,
965; H.T., Dougherty, 654; H.T.T.,
Shonk and Good, 2694.
eet Ce
The raising of pullets and bor
keys takes six months or more.
ee
and kale
good in a vegetable loaf.
ee es
EE THEATRE
NIGHTLY 7 & 9. EXCEPT SUN.
FRI-SAT. Sept.
Spinach are espically
26-27
Sep)
MON.-TUE. Sept. 29-30
Sharyn Moffett — Regis Toomey
“CHILD OF DIVORCE”
PLUS “Code of the West”
WED. ONLY Oct. 1
THE BUMSTEAD FAMILY
“BLONDIE’S BIG MOMENT"
Barnharts FG SG TG TI. |
Hershey ...... 144 160 166 470
Pennell ....... 194 167 139 500]
Brown ........ 169 147 152 468
Barnhart ...... 161 177 169 507
Dougherty 237 215 202 65%
Total ....... 905 866 828 2599
Kreiders FG SG TG TI.|
Kreider ....... 180 191 177 548
Hipple ......., 152 158 196 506]
J. Hostetter 183 204 176 563 |
Reinhold ....... 155 165 175 495;
Bennett ........ 172 179 174 525
Total ......., 842 897 898 2637
|
Coril’s FG SG TG TI
J. Mateer ...... 153 153 154 460
A. Gelimacher , 171 172 202 545]
O. Mateer ..... 180 143 154 477
C. Hendrix . 180 198 182 560]
B. Corll ...... 169 197 204 570
Total 853 863 896 2612
I'reys FG SG TG TL
Brey iio 200 176 162 538
Balmer ........ 142 168 176 486
Breneman ..... 167 136 160 463]
Funk ......... 181 181 198 560
Dog 153 143 154 450
Total 843 804 850 2497
Tronios FG SG TG TI.
Boozer .......: 154 138 129 421
Pieler: 168 160 181 509
Here .......... 159 160 193 512
Kulp icin 159 146 186 491]
vs 191 157 208 556
Total ........ 831 761 897 2489]
Shonks FG SG TG Ti,
Schaeider 162 152 171 485
Penmnel} ....... 184 151 162
Mateer ........ 118 172 183 473
Peirsol ........ 165 138 190 493
Shenk. ......., 202 172 188
Total ........ 831 785 894 2510
|
Goods FG SG TG TI.
F-Good ....... 138 171 113 502]
Hurst .......... 148 167 165 480
J. Germer . 213 200 152
E Brown ...... 139 203 205 547)
M. Good .....: 184 202 214 600
Total ........ 842 943 909 2694
Spanglers FG SG TG TI
Packer ........ 167 169 160 496
Nels ......... 224 183 142 549
Gerberich ..... 143 165 116 424
Hallgren ...... 157 154 152 483]
Spangler ...... 158 239 122
Total ........ 849 910
WEY MATTERS
"YOUR MONE)
'W
i =
tr
“EA
fea
fund
«f
bad
519, &&
0
to sensible money
iTS A GOOD TRICK ...
And You CAN Do lt
BYE neither
spendthrift is the best approach
good rule: Bank part of your earn
ings belore you start any spending.
a‘'miser nor a
management. A
SHILIYW AINOW UNOA
. » A
o The Union National Mount Joy Bank =
x MOUNT JOY, PENNA. =
O :
ry MATTERS
W
Member of Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation
[<
YOUR MONE
your ofr
needs major repair, or only
a minor adjustment, our
trained mechanics will do
the job with speed and skill.
They use proper equip-
ment and only factory en-
gineered and inspected
parts. Stop in soon and
enjoy trouble-free driving!
PROMPT
ECONOMICAL- DEPENDABLE /
Bring your car in today
for an expert check-up!
LUBRICATION
COOLING SYSTEM
BATTERY
BRAKES
SPARK PLUGS
GENERATOR
TIRES
STEERING
WHEEL ALIGNMENT
FUEL LINES
WIRING
HEADLIGHTS
AMENT’S
DELTA & HENRY STS, MOUNT JOY, PA.
A)
SERVICE
KOT)
THE SIGN OF
GARAGE
PHONE 21-W
BETTER SERVICE
JE |
|
|
TO :
Organize Fire Company
AND ELECT OFFICERS
9-18-2tp
re] ere
EVENINGS MATINEE
sHOwsS AND
7AND 9:00 P. M. SATURDAYS
| 1 HEATRE |
2:00
6-8-10 P.M. « WM,
Mount Joy, Pa. CRETE SAT.
FRIDAY — SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 26-27
GENE KELLY — MARIE MACDONALD
“Living In A Big Way”
-in-
MONDAY — TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 23-30
LUISE RAINER
“The Great Waltz”
. WEDNESDAY — THURSDAY, OCTOBER 1-2
ROY ROGERS
“Bells of San Angelo”
MILIZA KCRJUS -in-
DALE EVANS -in-
FRIDAY — SATURDAY, OCTOBER 3-4
BETTY HUTTON JOHN LUND
“Perils of Pauline”
-in-
RHEE
SAT. NITE, OCT. 4th
The Fire Co. Presents the years biggest show
and The Gang
Top Favorites with everybody, & Comedy io please you
THE HOLLIDAY DANCERS
This Dance Revue is poditively the best Dance Act ever to
appear at Rheems
MUNRO and ADAMS
This Act is well worth the admission price alone.
HUMOR JUGGLING COMEDY
JACK HOLST & MILADY
Absolutely the finest act of its kind on the stage today.
FRANK ARENA
THAT DYNAMIC MASTER OF CEREMONIES
A Whole Show Himself
ROY REBER'S ORCHESTRA
EATS AMUSEMENTS
ADMISSION 50c¢
GAMES
St
mot
pre:
fart
bric
for
wit]
give
ii
» am
en
49 N.