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VOLUME XXIII.
JUST THE THING
WHICH ALL MUST HAVE
0.--
'VOW is the time to econom!zo when money is
II scarce. You should .study your interest by
supplying your wants at the first class store of C.
N. BEAVER, North-east corner of the Diamond.
He does business on the only successful method,
viz: by buyinz his goods for cash. The old fogy
idea of buying goods at high prices and on long
credits is
EXPLODED.
Call and examine our fine stock and don't be
RUINED
by paying 20 per cent. too much for your goods else-
Wharo. We will chalenge the community to show
forth a more complete stock of •
- 11A - TFS; - iilFori
latest styerFWrrato sui - WI,
C. N. BEAVER'S.
BOOTS, all Ulnas and prices,
at C. N. BEAVER'S.
SHOES, of every description_for_Men's, Ladies',
Misses' and Children's wear,
at
C. N. BEAVER'S.
CLOCKS, every one warranted ano aold
by -C. N. BEAVER.
TRUNKS. of ell sirs, the very best manufacture,
---also--uuurmated-an4l-aol-1
by __ C. N. BAEVER.
VALISES, of every kind, also very cheap.
at C. N. BEAV SR'S:
HATS, for Ladies. Misses and Children, It.fresh
Papp'' , received every week and sold
by C. N, BEAVER.
NOTIONS, a full line as follows. sold
by C.N.BEAVER.
P APER COLLARS, for Men and Boys wear,
the most complete and finest assortment in town,
by C. N. BEAVER.
HOSIERY, of every kind, for sole,
Iy C. N. BEAVER.
GLOVES, for Men and Boys wear,
at U.N. BEAVER'S.
81./ sr pi DEIIB, for Men and Bove wear,
at C. N. BEA VER'S.
CANES AND-UMBRELL AS, a complete stock
C. N. BEAVER'S.
- BROOMS AND BRUSHES, of the vet.) , best
kind, at N: BA EVER'S.
TOBACCO, ta suit the taste of all,
at C. N. BEAVER'S.
CIGARS, which cannot be beet, for sale.
by p. N . BEA VER. •
SISUFF, which we thalinge apy one to excel in
quality, for sale
at
C. N, BEAVER'S.
INK and PAPER, of every description,
at C. N. BEAVER' , S.
CANDIES, always fresh too, for sale,
at e, N. BEAVER'S
SPICES, for gala
CRACKERS, of eyety kind,
at C. 11. BEAVER'S
INDIGO 111,t7E,
C. N. BEAVER'S,
CONCENTRATED LYE, for only,
at C. N. BEAVER'S.
KEROSENE, of the very lest,— Pitts. thl,
ut N. BEAVER'S.
LAMP CIIIMNIES also,
at C. X, BEAVER'S,
And many other articles not necessary to mention.
We now hope that you will give us a share of your
patronage. We are indeed, thankful to you tur past
patronage, and hope a cont;nuance of the same,
and amain yours truly,
CLARENCE N. BEAVER.
Waynesboro'; blue 2, 1810.
The World Renowned
MEDICINE
Drs. D. Pahrney & Son's
CELEBRATED
PREPARATION
CLEANSING TIIE BLOOD.
WILL CURE
ISCRnFULA, CUTANEOUS PISEASES, ERY
SIPELAS. BOILS, soup Ey - Es, SCALD
HE ID, PIMPLES, and BLOTCHES ON
THE FACE, TErFER AFFECTIONS,
01,1 find STUBBORN ULCERS, RHEU
MATIC AFFECTIONS, DYspEp-
SIA, COSTIVENESS,
SICK HEADACHE, SALT
•RIIEUM, JAUNDICE, GENERAL DE-
BILITY. CHILLS AND FEVER, FOCI,
STOMACH, TOGETHER with ALL OTH
ER DI EASES AM:4NC* FROM IMPURE
' BLOOD AND DIsORDERED
TRY ONE BOTTLE OR PAACKACE
And be convinced that this meditice is uo humbug
Sold by all Druggists.
QA,t'TION.
Drs. D. IPa hrney & Son's Preparstion for Cleans
ing the Blood is t;OUN TERF EITEL). The gen.
pine has the name D. PA HRNEY & SON' on
the front of the outside wrapper of each bottle, and
the name of lyre D. eahrney &, Son's Preparation
for Cleansing the Blood, Doonsliero, Md.. blown in
each bottle. All others are COUNTERFEIT. Rec
ollect that it is Dts. Fabrney & Son's Celebrated
Preparation for Cleansing the !Mood that is so uni;
venally used, and so highly recommended; aid
do
pot allow the Druggist to induce you to take any,
thing else that they may say is just the same or as
good, because they make a large piofit on it.
PREPARED BY.
• Drs. D. 11.4RRNE YID SON ,
BOONSI3OIIO, MD.,
And Dr. P. D. Fahrney, Kedysville, Md.
Be sure to get the genuine. None genuine =-
len signed FAHRNEY &
Sold by Dr. J. . Aunansoir, Waynesboro' Dr.
J. BORIEOLDER, E WsKuvt, Quincy ; FEEDS' ICE
• . • .
Sensor, Shady Gr re.
jaue ao- 6ruos) . •
'Don't cry, Nellie,' said a piping little voice.
'You know what mamma tell& us the night
she died. • 'God will provide, she said, I
ain't a bit hungry; indeed, indeed I ain't'
It was Saturday night—a wild, bitter win
ter night. The wind rattled at the loose ease
ment and roared down the fireless chimney.
The two orphans had eaten nothing all day,
and there was not a cent in - the houseFreTtai
earliest dawn, the eldest had been sewing at
a bit of piece-work for a clothing-store, in
hope to complete it before night; but now,
when dusk had come, and the task was still
unfinished her brave heart had given way,
and letting the waistcoat fall into her lap, she
had burst into despairing teals.
Nellie Thorndike and her little sift year.
old sister, Annie, were the children of a
clergyman, who had worn himself out in the
service of his Master, in an obscure country
district. His wife had soon followed him to
the grave, broken-hearted, leaving the or.
phan offspring alone and friendless, in the
great city to which she had come, in hopes
to earn a living by giving' lessons in music.
For awhile Nellie had fought bravely to keep
the wolf from the door. But as her needle
was her only resource, the battle bad gone
steadily against her, First, one comfort hail
to be given up, and then another; no fire had
been kept, though winter had come, very
often the sisters had gone superless to bed
To-day they had eaten nothing. The last
crust, the last penny were gone, No wonder
Nellie had broken down I Even at seven
teen, when bore is still high, there an be
such a thing as despair.
C. N. BEAT.E4'S
But she rallied at her little sister's words.
Hastily brushing the tears from her eyes, she
took the child in her arms, and kissed her
vehemently.
know ! I know 1' she said, have been
weak and wicked. Yes, darling God will
provide'
'And don't you remember,' said Annie,
nestling to her sister's heart, 'that verse in
the Bible, about never seeing the righteous
forsaken, or their seed begging bread ? Moth
er need to give it to me to learn by heart.'
She was interrupted by a. loud, imperative
knocking at the door.
iliark I . What was that ?' she cried, in a
frightened whisper.
Nellie started to her feet, but still held
the child. She was pale, and trembled, and
had a wild look, as of one hunted to' death.
'lt is the landlady,' she said. 'I promised
to pay the rent to-night; and I had forgot.
But I haven't a penny: What shall we do 7
She will tarn us out in the street.'
'Oh I not to night, not to-night r cried
Annie, convulsively Olutehing her sister.
'Just listen to the storm.'
The danger roused Nellie, as danger al•
ways rouses the brave. Her eyes kindled.
Her frail form seemed to grow taller.
'She won't dare to do it; She cannot be
so mid i ' she said. Yet she hardly believed
her own words. 'But I must go and open
the door.'
She put Annie down as she spoke, The
child, followed clinging to her skirts,
The knocking, by this time, had beoome
almost furious. Nellie , lichened the door,
and steed, there, with a faat•beating heart,
but outwardly calm. Brave, noble girl t
It was, as abe had expected, the landlady.
But, to het surprise. no angry countenance
met Nellie's gaze. The new comer was in a
flurry of apparently pleasurable excitement.
'Oh,, Miss l' she cried, raising her hands,
as if in admiration,
,'such a carriage as is at
the door—with a footman - as wall, Mies:—
She spoke in shorcgraaping sentences, evi•
dently .out of breath witti.her baste. •Tbey
arc asking for you, Miss Nellie Thorndike
IiTAYNESBORO, FRANKLIN . COUNTI, PENNSYLVANIA, THURSDAY MORNING, liiCEMBEItA,I6IO,
XpcmatirictlALL.
APIS& .
ter azoasx morn.
After the shower, the tranquil seen;
After the snow, thti emerald leaves;
Silver stars when the day is done;
After the harvest, golden sheaves.
After the cloud* the violet sky;
After the tempest, the lull of waves.;
Quiet woods when the winds go by;
After the battle, peaceful graves.
After the knell, the wedding bells;
After the bud, the radiant rose;
Joyful greetings_from_sad_farewells_;_
After weeping, sweet repose.
A fter the burden, the blissful meed ;
After the fight; the downy rest;
After the furrow, the waking seed
After the shadowy river—rest.
NIGHT.
'Tie nibbt on the mountain brow,
And night on the shadowy lea.
'Tia night in the starless
And dark is the tracklass sea.
And the golden moon shall break
-On hilltop, on landscape and main;
But the night in my weary said
Shall never be lilted agiin.
When this heart of mine was young,
• : s emutl_fair_and_gay,
Joy lent wings to the rosy hours.
And 0 ! it was always day;
But now, in my saddeled soul,
Bereft of its visions bright,
There reigns the darkness profound
Of everlasting night.
FrwrYr. - 7' - 70rN'"7 - 11
"GOD WILL PROVIDE,!!
BY KATHARINE STANLEY.
Ahxi Viamiay• ivevtraroa,z,e3r.
end her sister I There's such a grand old,la
dy in the carriage. With such beautiful
white hair. Such a dress 1' And her builds
went up again. 'They're coming tip stairs
themselves to see you, l've just run ahead--'
At this point, the landlady's exclamations
were out short by a tall footman, who natter•
emonionely pushed her aside, making way
for the most wonderful vision, in the shape
of an old lady, that Nellie bad never con
ceived of, maoh less beheld. So stately and
grand, and yet eo sweet•looking withal, and
dressed so magnificently 1 If she bad been
a fairy god mother she could net have over
powered poor Nellie more.
'lt is 1 It is ? eried this apparitiOn, as
soon as she saw Nellie. 'You have my dear
brother's eyes, and your mother's sweet
month. Oh, my darlings I. that you should
have_come_to War
As she spoke, she looked around the bare,
wintry room, and then clasping the orphans
in her arms, sobbed aloud.
am your aunt, my' dears,' she resumed,
chreotly. 'Your father's only sister. Have
you never beard him talk of sister Annie ?
One of you is named after me. It is you, is
it, you darling ?' and she kissed first Annie,
and then Nellie, bolding them, by turns, at
arm's length, and passionately regarding
them. 'A widow, a childless widow now, lir.
ing these many years away off in China, till
I lost my dear husband, when I came home
-to- find—all—traee—of—you-gone.--We, have
searched everywhere for you. But it was
not till to day that I came on your track.—
Thank God ! I have found you at last!--
You must come and live with me, to take the
place of those I have lost. The carriage is
at-the doer. What a happy, happy day--I'
That night, as Annie nestled to her.isis..
ter's — arms, after the orphans bad gone to bed,
-in-the-grand-mansion-to 7 ,which'' their aunt
carried them, she whispered, 'Wasn't I right,
Nellie, dear? Didn't . motber tell the truth?
Yee ! God will provide.'
And Nellie murmured, amid happy, thank.
fill tears, clasping Annie closer to her heart.
'Yes, darling, God will provide.'— Peterson's
Magazine.
Salt for the Throat.
In these dap; *heft diseases" of the throat
are so universally prevalent, and in so many
cases fatal, we feel it our duty to say a word
in behalf of a simple and what has been with
us a most effectual, if not a positive cure of
sore throat.
For may years past indeed we may say
duriog the whole of a life of more than forty
years, we have been ebb voted to sore throat,
and more particularly to a dry hacking cough
which is not only distressing to ourselves,
but to our friends and those with whom-are
are-bronght into business contact.
Last fall we were Waited to try what vir.
tun there was in woman salt. We coin-
mcnced by using it three times a day, morn-
ing, noon and night. We dissolved a largo
table-spoonful of pure table salt in about a
half small tumbler full of cold water. With
this we gargle the throat meat thoroughly
just before meal time The result has been
that during the entire winter we were not
only free from coughs and colds to which so
far as our memory extends, but the dry, hack
ing cough has entirely disappeared.
We attribute these satisfactory results sole
ly to the use of the salt gargle, and moat cor•
dially recommend a trial of it to these who
are subject to diseases of the throat.
Many persons who have never tried the
salt gargle, have the impression that it is un
pleasant. Such is not the case. On the con
trary, it is pleasant and after a few days' use,
no person who loves a aloe clean mouth and
a.Grst•rato sharpener of the appetite, will a
bandon it.— Religious herald.
A SLEEPLBBB SECRIETARY.—The follow.
ing is told of Sir Even blepean„ formerly
under Seeretary of State of Great Britain:
One summer night be was affected with
an unaccountable sleeplessness, end, being
quite weary of lying awake, he got up, dress.
ed, and went out at a o'oloak A, Itt, stroll
log aimlessly, more from delay habit than
any thing else, down to the home office.—
Entering his private room, his eye caught
the following entry in a momorandum•book.
'A reprieve to be sent to coinera ordered for
execution at York. Although he knew that
he had done his own'part of the business,
he was seised with a nervous uneasiness,
fauoyiug that perhrps the:other people had
not done theirs. The feeling was so strong
upon him that he called up the chief .clerk
in Dewing Street, who said that he had sent
it to the clerk of the erown,'whose business
it was to forward 'it to York. 'But have
you the receipt and certificate that it is
gone7"No."Then let us go at once to his
house in Chancery Lane.' They did so,
and found him in the act of stepping into
his gig for a holiday. Ile bad forgotten the
reprieve, and left it looked up in his desk.—
The fleetest express procurable was dispatch ,
ed, and reached York just as,the criminals
were mounting the Cart.
A SAD litorunn.—Wherever the PlMSi
ane have been around Metz, they have oar
ried off every thing that etas portable—oat
tle, horses; grain, fodder; even furniture,
bedding and linen. The department of the
Moselle is ruined for the uezt twenty years.
The Oneyards, for the most part, are demi rep
ed, and will not be productive again for five
or six years. All the wine that was stored
in the yillages bee bees consumed or taken
away. •In these villages in which the dread
ful conflicts of August and September oc
curred houses and 'gardens. are mere wrecks.
On the 8d -of November there remained
still inllvia twenty thousands wounded and
three thousand sick, lying in fiftystwo boa-
Ritals and ambulances.
A year of pleasure passes like a floating
breeze, a: moment of Wifo;tnne seems as an
n4°ot att. • • • •
Cause and Cure of Consumption.
BY DR. W. W• HAL.E..
Whatever renders the blood impure tends
to originate consumption. Whatever makes
the air impute makes the blood impure. It
is the air we breathe which purifies the blood.
And as, if the water we use to wash our
clothing is dirty, it is impossible to wash the
clothing clean, so if the air we breathe is im
pure, it is impossible for it to abstract the
impurities from the blood.
What then are some of the more protni.
neat things which render the air impure 7.--
It is the nature of still water to become im
pure. It is the nature of still air to become
impure. Running water purifies it elf. Ait
in motion, drafts of air, are self-pdrifiers
Thus it is that the air of a
it ii eke room be.
iiiiiiifn
iopure itievitabyfi: — T 3 that
clog room
bring consumption _ countless
thousands. Hence all rooms s ould be so
oonetruoted as to have a constant draft of air
passing through them. The neglect of it
murders myriads. A man of ordinary sire
renders a hogshead of eh urine for breathing,
consumes its blood-purifying quality, every
hour, so perfectly, that if a man could re
breatlie a full breath of his own the next in
stant after its expiration, without any inter
mixture with the outer air, he would he in '
gaudy suffocated. Hence sleeping in close
rooms, even though alone, or sitting for a
very short time in a crowded vehicle or a
=rtion-g-a-large-a se em bly - is - perfeetly - corrupt
ing to the blood. Close bed-rooms make the
graves of multitudes.
Among other causes of oonstimption are
insufficient food or clothing, sleeping in bait,-
mints, or Sitting . habitually in damp apart- 1
- meets: A dog will become consumptive in' a •
few weeks if confined in a damp cellar, 43e
pocially if it be a dark one.
Renee the room which we occupy for the
largest portion of each twenty-four hours
should be the lightest, dryost, moot airy and
cheerful in'the whole building.
As occasional causes of consumptive .dis.
tram, there may be mentioned all supprea•
alone, the sudden driving'in of all eruptions,
such as measles, tatter, and the like, the sod
den healing up of sores, which have been
running fora long time, without intelligent
medical advice, in carrying off the drains of
the system in another direction. Many lives
are thrown away by ignorant person/oi' rip
plieations to old sores ; they are elated in the
highest degree in haviogicared up' an ulcer,
which the 'regular doctors' had failed to do
after months of effort, but they tail to note
the after fact that within a very short time
the toured-up sore' has broken out again, or
felling on the lungs, has laid the victim in
the - grave.
Ala AND EXEROISEL—No remedy known
to men has such a powerful and permanent
influence is maintaining or regaining health
as the judicious employment of cheerful, ex
ertive exercise in the open air; and of prop
erly attended to in a timely manner, it will
cure a large majority of curable disease', and
will sometimes succeed when medicines have
lost their power.
If you have actual consumption, or are
merely threatened with it; or if, from some
of . your ; relatives having died with it, you
have unpleasant apprehensions of its lurking
in your own body; or whether from a die
eased liver or disordered stomach, or a dys
peptic condition of the system, the founda
tions of the dreadful disease ate being laid in
your own person; or whether by exposure,
by over bodily exertion or mental labor, or
wasting cares for the present, or anxieties for
the future, or by hugging sharp pointed mem
ories of the past, or by intemperate living,
in eating or drinking, or by unwise habits or
practices in life, you have originated in your
own person the ordinary precursors of eon
gumption, such as backing cough, pains in
the breast. .chilliness, wasting of flesh and
strength, shortness of breath on exercise—
under all these circumstances, a proper at
tention to - air and exercise are indispensable
aids—are among th e principal, essential
means of cure, and aro never to be d'.. :seed
with ; confinement to the rept • e , tempo
attire of a room, in any latitude, ii certain
death, if persevered in ; and if from any
cause this air and vstercise are not practice.
ble to you, except to a limited extent, it is
your misfortune ; you not being able to em
ploy them does sot make them the less sea
emery, and they have no substitutes.
I:C=Mil
A GOOD MORAL CHARAOKER —There is
nothing which adds so much to the beauty
and power of a man as a good moral charac
ter. It is his Weald), -his life. Such a char
ter is worth more, to be desired more than
anything else on earth. It makes a man free
and independent: No servile tool, no crouch
ing sycophant, nor treacherous honor-seeker,
over bore such a character. The pure joys.
of truth and tighteousness never spring in
snob a person. If young men but know how
truly it would dignify and exalt them, bow
glorious it would make their prospects, even
in thio life, never should we find them yield
ing to the groveling and baseborn purposes
of human nature which destroy body and
'man in Terre
Haute. tells a, story of a barber wbo was
shaving him sometime 811300. The barber
stopped a few moments and procured a box
upon •whiolt • be mounted to continue hie
work `What did you get that box for?'—
The bather replied : iTho snakes are all o•
ver the floor, sir, and I wanted to get out of
their way.' The customer insisted on fin•
Wig the job himself. .
•
The ear is queer. Sometimes it he re the
faintest murmurs of the zephyr; again it is.
oblivious to thunder like Dotes. A young
lady.hears an invitation to the opera even ii
given only in a. whisper, but don't hear the
loud call of
..her mother to to and sweep the
sitting room. •
The 'mind is the eteodard of the olio,.
Neariug this i) the Slwrit
When, alter the weary voyage that ~I tint
made aOlO.lll the peean,,siek and loathieme,
I arose one morning and went upon the deck,
holding on, oral - sling, I was but is • worm, I,
smelt in the air some . strpega smell, nod I
said to the captain, 'what is that oder?' It is
the land breeze from off Ireland.' , '
I smelt thwturf, I emelt the gram, I smolt
the leaies, andall my siekoese departed from
me; my eyei grew bright, my nausea was
gone. The thought of the nearnes s of the
kind came to me. :tad When afar cff,l saw
the thin line df land, jay came and gave me
health, and from that moment, I had neither
sickness nor trouble, I was coniing nearer to
the land.
Oh! is there not for you old men, and for
you wearied mothers, a laud breeze bloWing
off from heaven, wafting to you some of, its
sweetness? Behold, the garden of the Laid is
not far away. I know from the air. Behold
the joy of home. Do I not hear the &Indian
shout?, The air is full of musio to ouisilent
thought. •
Oh, hew full of muaio when our journey
is almost done, end we stand upon the hounds
and precinct of that blessed land! llold en.
to your faith. Believe more firmly. Away
with troubles and beatings. l3a happy;
you are saved.
In a few hours visions of GOd, and all the
realities of the eternal world shall be yours,
and—you-shall-be—saved—with—an—everfastin:
salvation. •
Romantic Marriage,
The Orleans Picayune of the inst.,
has the following : g.
A few days since a well dressed and hand
some youth, of some eighteen yeata of age,
appeared before - ohsof our city magistrates
and asked if for could engage his service to
perform a marital ceremony. The reply was
in the affirmative and the young tuau left,
bat shortly afterwards refined, accompanied
by a sombre looking female, middle, aged
and dressed in black.
'ls this lady your tuottier?' inquired the
magistrate.
'Oh; no, air, this is the lady' 1 desire to
marry,' replied the youth, as the lady drew
aside her veil disclosing a wrinkled counte
nance but on which for a moment gleamed a
sort of icy Smile.
'lndeed:
'Oh, yes, sir'
'Bat are you of age?'
'Not yet, but this lady is my • guardian.'
'And she gives her consent!'
'Yea, sir.
The magistrate was in aquandary. Ile •
didn't know exactly What to do. He hated
to sacrifice the youth and join the bright•
faced May to the gloomy, icy December.—
'lsn't this rather a strange union?' lie at
length asked.
'Not at all,' replied the expectant bride.
"I have a large amount of property which I
desire to leave this young man. As I have
relatives who might dispute the will were I
to give it to him as a legacy, I prefer to mar•
ry
'And you are content to marry this woman
for her money?' asked the justice.
'Well, I shouldn I marry her for anything
else!' replied the boy loom. 'She isn,t pret
ty'
And without mote ado the ceremony was
concluded,
Col. Susan 13. Aathoay bee been flak
ing a good deal lately, and has caughtwhat
is called a 4 ministees sore throat.' She bas
never been able, however, to catch the min
ister himself.
EATING Wiruour APPETITE:—It is wrong
to eat without appetite o it shows there is
no gastric juice in the atom eh, end that na
lure does not need food, an there not being
any fluid to receive and act pen it, it would
remain there only to putrei the very tbo't
of which should be sufficient to deter any
man from eating without ao appetite, for the
remainder of his life. If a 'tonic' is taken
to whet the appetite, it - is a mistaken course;
it its only result is to cause one to eat more,
who heady an amount has been eaten bo
yond w • t the goalie Noe supplied is able
to proper,
The °hie% to be obtained is a larger sup-
ply of gastrie, o a larger supply of food;
and whatever fails to accomplish that eased•
fiat object, fails to have an efficiency towards
the Cure of dyspeptic, disease; and as the
formation of the gastric juice is directly pro
portioned to the wear and waste of the sys
tem, which is to be the means of supplying,
and this wear and waste can only take place
as the result of "exorcise, the point is teacbed
again that the efficient remedy for dyspepsia
is work-..-Out door work*betetleial and sue
easeful in direct proportion as isragreeable,
ioterecing, end profitable 1
There flourishea in the village of Kent,
England, one of those good'natured old la•
dies who have a host of details, and who be•
lieve on all occasions on giving good effect
to their conversation. At one of the periodi•
cal tea parties to-which the village is subjeet,
she was entertaining the company with an
aecottot of a most astonishiog hog which her
father had fattened to the enormous weight
of six thousand pounds I Quite a murmur
of surprise went round the room, during
whieb bar-busband•seggested :
• 'O6, no, my &ail xi was • six hundred
pounds.'
'Why, Jeremiah,' said she, is diagset,lthe
skin w&gbed that:, -
Johns Hopkins is' the wealthiest 'Patti
memos. His eststes,, valued st $7,000,000,
be intends to place at the' disposal of. trot
tees to found the 'Johns - Hopkins University
of Baltimore! He 75 "ears old sad a
:baohalor, and' earnedill his tortutitr:
It is so billy in.. New Ilampsbits tbs . peo
ple look up the shiconsys tom uhea•the
COWS. 47.0034 bstos. . -
00000.,13041,* 1342 P
Billing's Advice to
De•awilneans, Joe, git married, Wyss bee
got , a :fair show. Don't stand shiveting.
the •bank; but pitch is and stick. yew head
wader and the shiver it • over. • There ain't
envy more trick in gitting married after pit
are teddy, Than there is in eating Woute.'
Many , a -man hen stood shivering on tba
•shore till the river awl rue oat. Doug ex
peot few marry au angel, the ange's her awl
bin picked up long ago.. ltemeniber, Joe,.
yu ain't a saint yureself. Iht not mom for
bitty exefoosively; buty is like ice, awful
slippery, and falls dreadful easy. Don't mar
ry for luv neither; luv is lik a ecnikiog stove,
good for nothing when the fuel give* out.—
But a mixture. Let the mixture be some
buth-becomingly dressed, with about 6225 ,
in her , pocket, a good speller, handy and
neat in the house, plenty ev good sense, a
tuff.eoustitowiliun and by-laws, small feet, a
light stepper; add tow this clean teeth an&
a warm heart; the whole tow to well shaken
before taken. This mixture will keep in ea
rly climate, and not evaporate. It the cork
happens two be left out for revs or three min
utes the etrength ain't awl gone Joe, for
heaven's sake! don't marry for pedigree; thar
ain't much in pedigree, unless it is backed
by bank stoke. A family with nothing but
pedigree generally lake sense; _ are_like a_kite
with too touch tail, if they would only take
opt' some ov the tail they mite possibly gic
up,-but-they are—always—too-illustlious—tew
tuk oph the tail.
All dere fellow, don't be an old batehelor ;
tones=, and selfish, creuliog out or
,yurel
bole in the morning, lik a shiny•backed hee•
Ile, and then backing into it -again every
night, suspicious and sieptieted
I'd az.soon be a stuffed rooster, set up is
a show window, or a tin weather-rooster oa
a ridge pole or a female seminary, sa a lone.'
sum batchelor, jeered at by the virginity ov
the land.
WITHOUT GaZENBACKS —The Overland
Monthly tells how the Mormana manage to
get along' without any greenbacks:
Hundreds of farmers, •living in reasonably '
comfortably circumstances, and having large
families to ciotbe and educate, will not see a
dollar in money for years. Such a farmer
wishes to purchase a pair of shoes for his
wife. • Ile comets the shoemaker, who a.
were his willingneet to furnish the shoes for
one • Lid of wood. lie has no wood but sells
a call for a quantity of, adobes the adobes
for au order on the tuerobaots, payable in
•goods, and the order for a load of wood, and
straightway the matron is shod. Seven
teitaelens purchase a ticket of admision to the
theatre ! He pays for the tuition of his Aft.
then se . venty.five cabbages per quarter.—
The &Ninnies reeieves for bar service four
squashes per day. He settles Tin ch_ureh
dues in sorghuin molasses. Two loads of
pumpkins pay his' anual subscription to the
newspaper. He baps a 'Treatise on Celes
tial Marriage' fora load of gravel, and a bot•
tle of Soothing syrup for the baby for a bushel
of string beans. In this primitive method,
until the advent of the railroad oice.tentbs
of the business of the territory was conduct.
ed, And even now; in the more remote*
settlements, a majority of all transactions are
of this character.
00IIRTiNG IN pausen.—A young gen.
tleman, happening to sit at °hutch in a pew
adjoining one In which sat a young lady for
whom he conceived a sudden and violent
paasson,vias desirous of entering into a court
ship on the spot; bat the place not suiting a
formal declaration, the exigency of the case
suggested the fallowing plan : He politely'
handed his fair neighbor a Bible open, with
a pin stuck in the following text-Second
Epistle of John, verse fifth : 'And now I
beseech thee, lady, not as though I wrote a
new commandment unto thee, but that which
we had from' the beginning, that we love
one another.' She returned it pointing to
the sioond obapter of Ruth, verse tenth—
''Then-she fell on her face,—and bowed her
sell to the ground, and said unto him, Why
hate I found grace in thine eyes, that thou
shouldst take knowledge of me, seeing that
lam a stranger?' He returned the book,
pointing to the thirteenth verse of the Third
Epistle of John—'Having many things to
write unto you, would not write with pa
per and ink, but I trust to come unto you,
and speak Lace to face, that our joy may he
full' /From the above interview . a marriage
took place the ensuing week.
Down on the Wabash the mosquitoes.
grow so large that they harness them up to
sulkies. On the lower Mississippi a man,
was chased by them until he wan forced to*
torn a largo iron sugar kettle over him for
protection. Thoy bored through the kettle
with their bills and he amused himself by
onm:thing ibe bills with an az he had in hie.
belt. After a while so many of them were
fast at they flew away with - the kettle.
It is by whit wo ourselves have done, an&
not by what others have done for us, that.
we shall be renumbered by, after ages.
It must be a thorough. fool who out leant
uotblog from his folly.:
When would Paris meet resemble a poet
Wben it wee being libelled. ,
The fellow who pureed . a wateh says he.
reified money with a lever.
Many persons are esteems/ inetels ba
cisme they are.not koown.
'resin , yon present s will hafq vs.
nit, qo alsolat
„
. ,_ . .. ~
bt'a
NtIIBMI 26