Miy - W.. 381x,f=.,, VOLUME XX AN Ito Sr.UNNEgIBBIDSI GEORGE STOVER /LAS RETURNED FROM PIIILADEL- PHIA WITH A SUPPLY 01? DRY GOODS, NOTIONS, QUEENSIVRE GROCERIES, ger To which he invites the attention of pf his patrons and the public generally. March 30, 1866 AMERICAN LIFE INSURANCE AND TRUST CO., Corner Fourth and Walnut Streets, Philadelphia Incorporated • 1850. Charter Perpetual: Author ized Capital, $500,000. Paid Up Capital, $250,00t) Philadelphia, Feb. 4. 1864. • The Trustees have this day declared a Dividend f - d* FIFTY Pelt CENT, on all premiums received upon Altrruat s Ponicnes during the year ending De cember 31st, 186:1, and in force at that date; the a bove- amount in bp credited to said Policies, and have also ordered the Dividend of 1860 on Policies halted during that year to be paid, as the annual premiums on said Policies are received. . OFFICE 48. • • l'residpoi—Alexantior Whilldin. Secretary and Treasurer—John S., Wilson. hoary—John C. Sims. • BOARD OF TRUSTEES.—Alexandor Whill din, .1. Edgar Thomson, Guorgo Nugent, lion. Jas. Albert'C. Roberts'. P. 13. Mingle. Samuel Work, William J. Howard, Hon. Joseph Allison, Sunspot T. Bodine. John Aikman e Charles F. Haar, lilt, Isaac. Haileburst. Wll. G. Rim, Chaniberiburg Pa., is the general Agent of the American Life Insurance and 'cruet Company:fur Franklin Co. ._ . Jos. Llocutns, Agent for Waynesboro' and vicin- RE CERENCES.—Jonx MOWS and WILLIAIt 11. 111101711KATON: Ball and get a pamphlet. - ' JOS. DOUGLAS, Agent. Oet. 18, 1865, ly. EAGLE,PIOTEL. - 2 Central,. Square, .Hagerstown, Md • I r. 11 4 ., alcove 'well•krinwri,,, and es,tabliehint 'Hotel I has .imen re-oponed paid entirely innovated, by the uniter Signed, and now otrers to tho putilic'every codifort, arid attraction found in'_ Ifte",],best..Lhotels.— 'IILE'FABLE' is bountifully supplied With"fivary dclica"y Bid inarkit , E SALOON container. the etioicost.liquors..arutis i.onstainly and akillutly,attende4l. , 171-1-E 'STAIIfLE is thoroughly repaired, fatut ,carrful :1201cra' aimutyr4a4.lyl-ti)-,ao cutatuodato!custotwers„.,,, • • • „, 10H,4 EltiftEß, Piopnelfir. , . llagers, wn, lune 2 - ; ~, . • ' 51 ) 13111zer' th44e tattle'VkiWilet. r M. STONER having purchased.tot _111,. - M.ertzer,Ahe .recipo for t making —,tba - A iovo far-iame4 2 llnrse and tat t tlO,TaFfilar; fir kenns t ylva. , " nia st ainl lakes -,4l4ll;nrwthod of info piing the fanners, ilnivers,:illeC., that te hits oehintf and' intelols,kecying,.a.gootk supply always ori"Vantl:— Alnunfry morehontt and oaken keeping such 'articles, "for Sari., ..ivo4l4llo_ well to Supply. thetuialiel.W.ith a tolf Intl* on coMmission or fot clscop: 'tordnis hil4filoct - tinkly dt,tentled to •' .I:lnti4ry • • WAYNESBORO',_FRANKLIN COUNTY, pENNSVLYANIA, FRIDAIFMORNING, JUNE "29, !SR Mi-X-CIALL TOE UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY. Could we but know The land that ends our dark, uncertain 'travel, Where lie those happier hilts and 'meadows low, Ah, if beyond the spirit's inmost cavil • Aught of that country could we surely know, • Who would not go ? Might we but hear The hovering,angers high imagine 3 chorus, • Or catch, betimes, with wakeful eyes and. clan, One radient vista of the realm before u s With one rapt moment given tolime or hear, Oh, who would fear Were we quite sure To find the peerless friend who loft us lonely, • Or there, by some Celestial stream as pure, To gaze in eyes that here were•lovelit only— Their weary mortal cc il, were we quitegure, Who would endure? OLD ?WENDS. The old, old friends! Some changed; some buried; some gone out of sight; Some enemies, and in the world's swift flight No time to make amends. The old, old friends— Whine are they? Three are lying in one grave: And from the far off world the daily wave • No loving nessage sends. The old*, dear friends! Ono passes daily; and one wears a mask; Another, long estranged, — cares not - to - ask . Where causeless anger ends.- The dear, old friends, So many and so fond in days - of youth; Alas! that Faith can be divorced from truth, When lore in severance ends.] The old, old friends! . They hover round me still in evening shades; Surely they shall return when sunlight fades, And life on God depends. MI~tC~~LLA.NY. NASBY CONFIDERIT. X ,ROADS, -I ??iSh is, in the } Stait uv Kentucky, May 21, 1860, 7'o Res Exeelknell the Dispenser nu Post 004.6, ANDREW' JornsSos;Prestilent icy the Yo9nited In akordance with poor esteemed request, dated the 25th and received this morning, I to wunst preceeded to make doe inquiry ez to the workin uv the Freedmen's Burow and the coridishens uv the Afrikan citizens uv Atverikin decent in this vicinity. The fact that a Ablishnist still holds the Post Orfice at the Corners (wich place - by the way, I hey been solicited to accept,) interfered materol ly with the bizness I hod in hand. I to wunst tooted the horn, ez is the custom when we hey religus se/via, and called my congrega tion together. They cum rennin in from different groceries, and here another difficul ty ensood. The grocery-keepers wanted to know what we wuz goin to hey meetin on week drys ler ? They wuz willin, to shut up doorin ineetin time oo Sundays, ez they re spected the Church, and it give em time to sweep out the t'backer, et-settury, but they'd be d--d of they wuz agoin to hey the peo ple pulled away frum theiroouristment on week days. I succeeded in passifying em, and wont in to wunst examining the leadin citizens. Their testimony is asfollows : , CAPTAIN SKELPEIt wuz a nigger Owner afore the war, and &trio the lute fratrasidlc struggle . wuz a Captin in the Confederit servis. Wnz with Gineral Forest nt Fort paler. Hez hed much ex.pe ! rienoe with niggers. --.Bleeves em to be a- I dapted to the elituit uv Kentucky, and much morn able to stand the hot sun than. the whites %%Then they wuz slaves never knowd etu to refo c.z to work—know they alluz did work coz he alluz stood over em with a nig ger whip. Since they hey ben free he bcz notist a change; not much uv a change, ontil the Nigger Burow wuz, establisbt. Before that they'd take 810 wages ez yoo choose to give mo—since then the.d—d heathen will stand out bout .ez the white men do, and wont work at all opless you meet their views, ieh-ntatle-a-heap-of-trattble-acd—ruateria, retarded .the development Iry the country.— The Illifew corrupted - the female nig gers, ez they bed all been legally married by the ehaplains to the men they'd lived with, and wuz so sot onlivin' with em, that there's no use uv tryin to get a house wench onless stio "took her huSbitud also. His 'Wife" wuz now dein 41,, , rtidin.work .at home- for 'want uv help. "Strongly -arked"the abron.ashen uv the Burow and the retuotaf'nv theAbliihun ' - t - D.EAQQN- ' ~wuz eggsamiaed. ..IVu4 cooyiust his„cwo mind that the 4frikap wuz Out uv , . his nor .malotpept,..attclAilt the infernal ,Ltatow wuz ,The..aigger,. afore the •,I arow iottui arouuti, - wuz decile and , easily controlled. his boy Joe wuz 013 Ca ;nigger. ,„ 11,14,get:up.-eyers meruiti...ol4 a. , 111 001101 is in A 0.41104440 grid,NQr.k Cve!Y .tiAy 4ill.after dark, .. 'aqua, ez, wuz„e• Ataetpa,Et — ,t ,ey ea p. - 1 I.up i ov movie. , told getV.9oo inaraiag, and. lie tald aae:iptputloatly, Altat 94actlts.aeds t heveodeor, • 1 undertook,- to ,ottasttse; ,with a fuzee iteke r wbevegp.ep,',,he, sailed `riu and ,w,lialadrnie,:.aad, „the atom, tu, wicstu applied. ter, radcese laftja face, .- J.Le. Ipft ,04, 10, uuNc 4.lKaggip .eat airAerabletAistgace „ . .IPetatikk -14cievgirterkia.1:70 ; 1 4 a ±±LairVoazia.earkt-ixpars. "1.1-S4l3idects. etgerly .pittante u%* day, and my farm Ts mild]) to weede.- He eobelooded by giving it ea his solemn opin• ion that he' Deter coed be reeowiled to ' the . Government )30 long ez the Bak:lw wua tol matedl.and that Ablishnist held the Post Or fis at Outlet's". i3EN.Nat's considered the Burew a inkubus upon the Stait It interfered between master and Set ' vent. Coed git along better of the nigger wuz left to the natural laws wick regulates capital and labor. Tried' to keep his Dig gers, and did . keep 'em the 'past Summer till after the orop was in, and then tried to set tle with 'em for four dollars a month; with sick deductions fer food, siekness . and brakin tools, et-settery, ez wuz just. Bio't the nig gers all uv em in my debt, and generously proposed to let em work it out in chopping kord wood chlorin the Winter. Hauled me up afore the Burow ' and was forst to, pay em each $l5 per month. Consider the Burow ez all that stands in the way nv reconstrue shen, though the removal uv the ablishen Postmaiter at the Corners and the appoint ment uv a sound constitutional Dimekrat wood greatly assist in conciliating the Ken tucky mind. I tried to get some nigger testimony, but cool elicit nothing worth while. One gerlirho spent the heft uv 'his time at Corners wuz opposed to - the - Bare* becoz — it stopt rations on him, and Lucy, a octoroon, who formerly belonged to and still resides with Elder Gavitt (who iz now absent as a delegate to a Southern relig ious convention at Louisville .) testified thatthe Burn* "wuz no great shakes" becaz both ez the Elder' wuz a widower and the father 'us?, 'ail her childretzee_wearan,—she isk — t - T •Il )e agent to ma. e the er 'tarry , her, .00dn't - do it. But doh evidence is irrelevant and I didn't consider it worth while botherin yoor Beeelency with it, both, how- entoval-uv-thebik un Postmaster at the Corners. ASSLif3I PETTUS wuz convinst the Burow wuz agin the pros perity uv the Stait and wuz underminin the moral and physikle welfare uv the nigger.— . It made him. impudent. lied some uv em workin fer him, and notist at noons and nites he would find em with a spelling book and a reader. Didn't bleeve in readio. Coed ent read hisseif, but bed a cousin wunkt who learned, but es soon ez he cood.read he mov ed-off to Injeanny, and becum a loathsome Ablishoist. • neared he wuz killed in the 'war, and served him rite. Wanted to know wilt he wood do when the niggers coed all read. Spored we'd hey to lect em to offis,ez the people slims select Bich wlpn they cod find em. Didn't bleeve in nigger equality, and was in favor uv a immediate change in the post orfis at the Corners. Captin McSlather thought things hed cum to a sweet old pass when a man coodent lath er a nigger without bein hauteirup afore a Burow. • Kurnel Potter thou;glit ef yoor ecksolency cood witness the eorrupshen that egzisted in the )3urow good make short work uv it.— Why, he whipped a nigger hand more than he ought perhaps, and he died uv the inju ries; It wuz a aggravatin case. The nig ger wuz sassy, and it cost $316 to provide for his family. That infamous Hurow made me pay far their rations all Winter. Ile asked ef this wuz or wuz not a free kuntry into which Ma things wus permitted- And the Ablishin Postmaster at the Corners ap proved the tyranikle action. He demanded his removal. I coneeve it to be onnecessary to - submit further testimony on this subjeck, but in this vicinity there can't be no doubt that there can't be that love fer the Government without wich free instooshens won't flourish to any alarmin extent ontil this monster is squelched. The. testimony is unanimous, and them ez I hey egzamined are represen wive men. You may hey notist also the unanimity with which they all bore testimony•to the necessity uv a change in the Post 0, fis abthe Corners. I endorse all they say on this question, konsiderin that that change iz as necessary .in the grate work uv pacifyin and consiliatinr. ez is the removal uv the Burow. In case a change iz made, I wood say fer your guidance that 1 hey been warmly solidi. toil by my friends to accept the position, and to pacify cm, hey at last yielded a reluctent consent. The fact that I never served in the Confederit army may be an objection, but to offset that I voted ler Vallandygum twice. ..11f possible, send me a pardon at the same time you send me my commission ea Post niaster, for if the Postorfis don't pay, I want th.t docatneut wood be essential to my sue- COSS. With sentiments tit , the most profuund re speck, I am Trooly yours, • PETROLEUM V. NAM, . Late pastor its , the Church uv the Noo penbashun. •.. FLIGHT OT tiME.--Another week- On and the waters of the great River flow on ward ;to , the spa,,its Time does to - Eternity...— we ar e upon the tide which ebbs not, but conies tis‘stendily out into 'that pecan that rolls round 'all the World—the oceanlof death and - oblivion. We mean an oblivion so .far as the •eltanging scones of tank are concern ' 01. Toil and struggle on; ye millions! the 'thy or rest ciirdeth,'wheti the 'angel of trim- quility shall enfold you in his arms andim- 'riot u ion 'Par brow thokiss_ of peace,—' When tW'st lonsetieci, and: ,the golden bowl broken, then ,sshall.lbe.dnst 1 yet aril to earth as. it.waß," 0,41 the spirit un• to . Ood:*1)i) gave - it." 'Thus conics the gat:,z urday eve of life, to all and offer' it,%iielOpe,- the : quiet Sabbath: Morn, 'oire ictiore y' r ou'gri. is to gil . to "ruin MATRIMONY• - Under this caption the editor of the Terre llautelapiess gets off the. following :dis couraging article to young men ~who have a hankering after crinoline and calico: Matrimony is a good thing. Of .this, there is no doubt—not any. If proof is • needed look at the uneasiness of young ben and young women'tintil they- are doubled; and notice the short time generally allowed to e lapse between the decease of the lamented first and the espousal of the-beloved second. All of which goes to prove that the desire for matrimony is implanted in every human heart and that the Welded 'state is normal and the single state abnormal, in short, that, as we stated in the first line, it is a good thing: Matrimony being a good thing should be encouraged; not only because of the happi ness of the individual, but for the good of societyut large, The married man has giv en bonds to society. He is tamed. The un married man lacks steadiness, fixedness of purpose and stability. With no one to care for but himself, be becomes improvident.— With no crosses to bear he becomes proud. With no one to ring his faults in his ears he becomes vain. lit can pack his carpet seek at a moment's notice, and hence is unrelia ble. Having co solid home , comforts, he seeks excitement in public places and be comes dissipated. In short he is a kite with out a tail, which may ascend rapidly to a considerable height, but which wobbles down ward in a disgraceful and disg usting manner. Therefore matrimony is a goo thing. We write these lines sorrowfully. Matri mony is on the decline. We were forcibly struck with this fact in visiting the County Clerk's office to procure the list of marriage licences to insert in yesterday's paper, and finding that this legal document had • been issued during the whole of last week to but e solitary pair. There is evidently -not that marrying and giving in - Marriage there once was, Which we lament. Why is it? Time was then it was perfectly and entire ly-safe for a young, man to wed the object of his adoration, with a very small amount' of ready money.. 'The lady's parents furnishing the outfit, the step was not very hazardous. A salary of $4OO or $5OO would not only, -keep the young couple, but with economy something Might be 'saved for a rainy day, which sooner or later overtakes us all. At present writing it cannot be done.— The female-portion of huinanity have higher ideas'than $4OO per annum. The rent, of a house to live in must be $lOO more than that sum, and the furnituie, $4OO will hardy fur nish the least pretentious room therein:— Then comes the expense of servants, of cloth ing, rides, excursions, parties, everything, why the salaries on which, The generation just going out married and thrived, raising' large families; is nowhere: These are stubborn facts, as every young man knows. Hence they Cannot ' Marry un til they have accumulated enough of this world's wealth to support this style; and by 'the time they have accomplished , this, nine out of ten of them are not worth marrying, or have lived so long alone that they have degenerated into the belief that it is the best mode of living and don't want to marry. . There is but one way of remedying this oTowin ,, evil. Cut down , expetases.- Make . matrimony attainable by all. The young men are as much inclined as ever, but they are barred. Fashion has placed a wide gulf between thousands of them and Matrimony, which can only be bridged with greenbacks. On the-one side they. . stand looking across longittgly--on the other the - thousands of young ladies approaching the dreary confines of old maiden-hood' are standing despairing ly. Fill up this gulf with common sense— take off the tariff oa, matrimony, and restore to the, ministers the good old times of yore. Parents, Take Heed. There are few butter investments than that which places before one's family a stock of good books, either of a , miscellaneous • char acter or those referring to his own business. Five, ten, twenty-five or fifty dollars' worth of kooks put into a boy's hands, will fill his head with ideas,—set him to thinking, and do more towards his future:* success 'in life, than a thousand dollars laid up on interest for him. - The latter may give him. more Capital to start on, but with a'good stock of ideas and a developed mind, he 'will do far bettor in life with a much smaller money cap ital to begin with. "It is the mind that makes the man," and the store of thoughts, and the exercise of the thinking and reasoning pow ers, are • what make .the mind. , .W hat, for .instance, would be the effect upon• the great ?ming-and-garden-if i rvtnd--frult-graw-iiig-in terests of this country, to say nothing of- its effect in/A:her directions, if every cultivator had one acre less, and its. value laid out on ,a library of books about his business. Would it not frequently keep his boys out of bad company and tend '-to their refinement ? Would it' not digdify his calling in , the eyes of his family and of himself,Jurnish food for , thought while_coga'ged io his daily toil, and ' by the hinti and suggestions 'denied,. pro mote the profit of his labor ? 'The subject is worthy ofkireful eonsicieration.-7Ames i con Agriculturist. XPITA - Plll3, ; . , ' Here Hesti.e bodylifergeret Flinn: Who wao r so. VP"' pure. whfiht.. *, I . „She, clippot,l the shell bf , her earthly skin , hatched heisrelf a chanil ,•., , Lci) :,;, Sit 'John TroHopei, a stout:gentleman, t a'Otone church in•,:England, .and was.blFied Within it. His epitaph rinds thus: . Here Boa the body. otHir lohn Trciliotte r ' -- "AiVtiticatteed , tiese•tatorseaf 4, tap::1", And"-When Ithonstker.calletkhioleetillVP ' litalk body -jilted ,this,.lwle , t , -j Cowards only 'see atioStri. - ' A Prompt :We suppose t e pu)le are genera — TT: ware of the : doings of • the State .constiableit during the past few months. They are en deavoring to make a clean,sweep of , tho, li quor dealers; but in a recent prosecution one of the sanguine officials caught a 'ruder in the shape of,a witness. When the case wits brought up in court; tho following laughable, scene occurred: -"Have you purchased any intoxicating lir quor , of defendant?" inquired, the eonitable. "Not that I remember," replied the wit ness coolly. "Have you obtained any at his store?" . "Not that I remember. " . . "Will you try,to recollect? Bear is mind that you are Under oath.: "I-am trying." A pause. Well, witness, what do you say now?" con tinued the official, presently. "I haven't made any discoveries yet." "Have you not, within a week, told per sons that you bought liquor of defendant!" "Not that I remember." "Did you tell me, niffeday, that -you had bonght spirits of defendant?" "Yes, sir." "You did! Alia! Well, sir, when you told me that, did you lie or tell the truth?" "1 told the truth." - "Well, sir, then you 'have bought spirits of defendant?" "Yes, sir." "What did you mean by swearing you could not remember?" "I meant that I could not." "Your memory returned" amazingly quick. Did.you pay defendant for the spirits you bought of him?" . "Yos, sir." "How much?" "Twenty-five cents." "What kind of spirits did you buy!" "Spirits of camphor." "Ahem! we rest the ease here." "Not guilty," came from the jury -box, as the members tried to appear sedate and dig pitied, and with au effort restrained them selves from joining in the roar of laughter that went round the court room.—Anterican Union. . That Axe: The other day I was holding a man WI hand as firm in Miter appearance as leather, and his sunburnt face was as inflexible as parch ment;—he Was pouring fourth a tirade of contempt upon those who complain that they can find nothing to do,: its an ekeuse for be coming idle loafers. Said I: "Jeff, what do you 'Work at?— You look hearty, and happy—what are you • at'?" "Why," he said, ' 4 l bought me an axe three years ago that cost me two dollars; that waa all ' the money I had. I went to chop ping wood by the cord. t, have done no thing else, and haNe deiced more then WO, drank no grog, and paid ito doctor, and 'have 'ought me a little farm in the Hoosier State, and shall be married next week to a girl who has earned $2OO since she was eighteen.— My old axe I shall keep iq the drawer, and buy a new one to out my wood with." After I left him, I thought to myself, "That axe, and no grog !" They are two things to make a man in this world. How small a capital. That axe. How sure of success with the motto, "no grog!" and then a farm and a wife, the best of an.— Aineri ca a Farmer, PERSONS BORN AT TILE WRONG TIME Dow,.Jr. ) thus closes one of his patent ser- MOM : "My respected friends :—There are many among you who, to be eelf•satiefied, ought to have been born a hundred years since. They appear to• have been east upon the earth ~at the wrong period, and in a wrong•place, like a duck's egg dropped by the margin of .some muddy pool. They find• no food suited to their tastes upon the sumptuous tables spread before them. They had rather either go back and pick the bones of the past, or Wok their fingers in the unprepared dishes of the future, than portake of the rich bounty that the present provides. Such folks 'are born both before and' after their time, ant have oo'business here at this eruct period. Iiow• ever, the fault its not theirs; and it is not my province to . cast blame upon their parents.— We thoule all, my friends, 'bestow little thought upon what has been 'or what is to be, but make the best of what is; and joy, peace and content shall be ours in• the oud. So mote it be!' ' An orator, in appealing to :be "bone and sinew" said : "IVI friends, I ant proud to bee around. me to-nig tie ar•y yeomanry of the land fur I love the agricultural inter est* of the country; and well may I love them, fellow-eitizens,:for I was born a farm. er;',tha happiest days of my youth were spent in the peaceful avocations of a son of the soil:- •If uray be allowed to "uso, a figura tive expression, my friends, I may say 1 was raised between two lows of corn. "A ptiMPltin, by thunder !" exclaimed 'an ine briated chap just in front'ef the stage. .A ybung lady went.into .a stotoo buy' a piece tritisie • entitled, •W h eh' sleep I dream"Of 'thee," but by a. ludierouv mistake sh*astimishad the young man by/inquiring if belled the taxisie entitled 'When I dream l'ideeir with thee.' • "•,• •• 1. I#i'Y AND •Bara% why. o .otie bilot;a!day , less flan low PL haiiBl'ur.UP 7 ecitnnion'soastris ;wortli. q r learni C,. , :1; that will.ateal.'a 11:1 : 111A 1616 'no inerinp.thserleth ir . ) purge:: A than -without money is like a bow ktY out strings. - , 'fi .i . o.;ir7 •,,, *MOO 0 ,•• r, • O,LI 1. !".. I. ftjy . •1 , CanciNUE ;;1 luny,, yAIyXI 'Oo - unty, itentnelyvi, u ce—soi her and, and teecived some I tight. hundred,.: ote'thousand dollars' in eaTh. A bight or tike strtier"cahr. d tinc4l,; gelled,4 the' ' T ni c ght: 7. Af ter some 'hesitatio lt he was admitted . bnier'hi . t he-nigh frhermaa-eroused the: lady r •who. toldl him ,tf.at fogr men were, try.lpg' to brcak , into the , hones, he. offing - Cr ros', y seized hie Plift6l,' lead her la go stairs and get behind the door and open it when he.direeted . ,her. Placing himself ,in position; he gikilt the liord;' she opened the deof;atid ih rushed a man, Who had no tio'ob.' ee plac34l his deet.on the doorsill, ;than ho't fell dead by a bullet, from tho stranger's -pisl 2 tol. A second man net the same fate. A. third was wounded; and ran.awny.. The dead men were reeogoized as the lady'ti son•inlaw and a. near neighbor. The third 'Mae was het sow.' . .' '" -"----'= -limo► - TAKEN AUACK.-A handsome sleigh:came. dashing up to a swell-front mansion one day last winter in fine: style and . stopping, out sprang a princely. dressed little fellow, who might have seen, a-dozen summers, but who t one , had the air o who labors under the im presSion fliat his faiher is - considerably his Junior in years and experience Accosting, a passing boy, probably a year or so older than himself, he c.v.:l-aimed : hold my horse:' The-boy-stepped-up,—and, looking ut the : • ‘.Ciiit'ette bey hold hitu ?" • , . "Yes, certainly."' _ "Well, hold, him yourself, ther4, epptinued he, passing ac, leaving our hero quite tokee, ' aback. • The editor of the kokomo Herald lately published an artielo that brougla down upon -the vengeful ire of sonieenragedleinalo: lie apologises to her thusly : "But really we hope she *ill overlook this little miistake 'in is, and always in the 'fittit're have soffit - fellow feeling in her bosom." • „`Well, Jim, how did you make it down South?' . • et-rate; made plenty of money.' ' 'What did you da with it?' , • ' • id it out in houses and lots.' 'Where' 'Avery [dude .1 heye been where' there was any.' ' 'What kind of houses and lots?' `Coffee houses and tots. of whiskey!' 111121111 "Wife,,/ triust insist upon f)aripg •soused hog's feet for breakfast every inorniug.."- 7 , "%Veil, bUsband, you can easily have thew by so'usibg- your feet in water when you'det out-of beil. ' ~P , Time ia':said to be money:• Certainly, net a few use• it in paying tlieir debts. "Don't afire much' about the ugs," enixl Mr. Swink;. "but the truth ie,Tve nut got the.biootl,to spare,'.'. The tears we shed for those we love are the streams which water the garden of the heart, and without them it would be dry and barren., and the gentle flowers oPaffec tion would perish. • im:r= A. IVestern•editor,. describing, the effects of a squall upon a canalboat says;—"When the gale was the highest, the 'unfortunate craft keeled to• larboard,And the' captain and another , cask. of whiskey rolled overboard." "YOUNG A arEntcA."--Sollool Mann— (pointing to the first letter of the' alphabet) —"Come, now, - whet letter is. that.?? Young America—".l. shan't toll yon." . School Marm—"You won't I But you must. .. Come, now, what is it?" Young Americo—•'l shan't tell you t diduToome hero to teach you r but, for you to teiteh me t" IT1=1111:111::1 . THAT'S A Go.— r A West Virginia punster challenged a, sick Man's- vote at the recent election, on he ground that be waS , an 'ill .. le9al Voter: Probably that is the same person -who chal lenged a squint-eyed voter,,beeause. be .was not natured-eyes ed. The history of human , degradation in one chapter: 'rhe'principal fait, the water-fall; and the• brandy and whisky-fall. -• 0 ' • The ukasythe i is without an, idea l general ly hat; the greatest idea - of himself : JustlY true. Four) widor'rs;, only, aro drawing revoltr 7 tionary pensions: • • The. earth goes:more 'slowly than, it. did, and 'will tomato a stand still in the:trifle. , of sixteon , hundred millions - ,otyears :according toga Freneh) aitronomer.o •We sh all see.,,L.: • •f • . II •4. '• Ifirfa An impenitent sinner no more right t 3 thansit saint. .• v•r - r A 'nian miry, have. mue Ate. World and not 66' . niii611 - or • • :1. , ;!c, kbx The hea*al 4roltble4.mader,.which 'many. persons 'groan are horroared. " I WO 4* , TO•11,,OyKOTIl , ilf tr)p 1:91111 that .thoti..la4ds,tra m 'to td! re s gnlf of rt. k t. ' Reaith (Pr Araln air ~ crh,Gfjl)o 1418.h11c :I! L S6 49.1 5e .., 1 :9 4 jotirpt - ' . r ...., i „ ,—,-,---.• . . ' 'E fe'vllcririukes : 1 , 064' 7 ri4, vdl;':kt):- - -tiEtii:tay, and cheats his neigq:ionl.i.)A-114,11,1" - t:t...tit;:igiiila,g. on:, neverthelq,s: • - • -.. - 7 ••••-vk;' , ...c.., 41 ''• .•:•L- -.-Za , l - : - . 1 -:-:•-'• - , ...•-...,..4.i....E'irk -, . - .: - ... Not Iqv 11 3 ;iv b,kg §,o.i u plpiu r . l - !01i .. ; . • n1i - o,' • v., A 901, iF, t t,gl ; t ip i: , 4 ~.i: I T. •I,f .., ; -1 1, • • ':,, 1 ;•,. -; l l,' {r,` SIMBVR 2 ==l
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers