~g ~Z7i7":~?3~t~i~i.~: VOLUME XIX POETX A.L. TAXINCr. BACHELORS. Tax them,, tax them:tax them all, With an income great or small— Tax 'there mortgages and rente r , On each dollar sixty cents; That's the toll they ought to ay, For wearing out the "Bach/ , f/Y; 1 So they'll,ery instead of lan e ,h, • Mourning for the ' , hotter -half." Tax them far the vows they've made, Tax them for their vows unpaid— For the drafts they're drawing still On their conscience and their will; Tax them for the debts they owe To young Cupid and his bow, For the ose of silver darts - And the lean of "treacherous arts." Tax them for the precious time t?lpent in willing silly rhyme, "To the fair, deluded girls; - Lost in blushes and in curls -L: Tax them for dishonor paid To the sunlight and the shade— Swearing they were truer far Than a sunbeam or a star. TeX them for their Wasted years, . Tax them for the bitter tears Drawn from eyes that once were bright With a soft, confi littg light— For the cheeks they've made s'o pale— Per the deep, paiketic wail, lireathedfrom hearts that must endure What ho surgeon's art can cure. Tax them for the hopes they've crossed, Tax them for the dollars lost, 13 _ Meant to keep the spirits calm;' When the lady fondly thought, • The "confessiOn" would be brought, -A nil - haiiil7 --- ----Virmil - dlielit - oiTtlits louse and land. Tax them for the weoil and cod Used to warm their daffy gout; Tax them for the cakes anti pies Made to charm the lover's eyes . • And for coal oil tax them well, Oh, tho gallons t who can tell 7 • That have burned, mid burned in vain, I'D secure a failileas swain! Tax them for the countless threats, • Matti by mothers to their "pets," 'When the months would pass away, Anti the lover' name no tlay ;" Tux them for the "awful smart," That was felt about the heart, When the last frail beau - had gone# And the lady weeps alone, Yes, I'd tax them one and all, With an income great or small— Tax their mortgages and rents, On each dollar sixty cents; Till their truent steps should stray, Calmly in the "married way"— Then I would enjoy a laugh With the "Bachelor's better half " K f: i+. A ROMANCE OF THE WAR [Correspondence el' the Chiengo 'Republican ] JACKSONVILLE, ILL., October 24, 1865. The facts which morose the following, bit of romance in real life have recently come to ray knowledge, and I have permission to publish them with the understanding that DO names are given. A well-to-dofarmer of this County had a daughter Who, besides beiag personally at tractive, was well educated and possessed more than the usual amount of, good sense. As a consequence she' had many suitors.— All but two of these sho treated with no fa vor; but between these two it was impossible for her to choose. She liked them both, but which she loved she could not tell made for three years' troops in 1861, these two men, together with the your* lady's -brother, enlisted in the same company.— This event disclosed to her her own heart; she =awed the man she loved, and on the morning he left for the field they were mar ried. Her husband was the possessor of no little property, and before he left lie made a will in her favor. While in the field a strong friendship bound these three men together, the rejected lover cherishing no ill feeling towards the husband of his love, or her broth er. At the battle of Stone River. on the 2d of January, 1863, the company they were in was in the fiercest of the strife. When that terrible ?conflict was over, the husband was found with his head blown off, and was only recognized by a letter found in his pocket from his wife. The brother was missing, and 4.he ;disappointed suitor was wounded so severely 'that his , life was despair ed of. - Sirirrilib was,liew maid end widow mourned with an almost breaking heart for her husband and . brother. The wounded Man recovered, but was unfit for further 'Bey vie° was discharged and came home. His uffection'4ai-still true and firm, and the fact of his association with the lover and lost gave ' him a strong hold upon the sympathies nod, regard of her wt.o had received the love of his ]ile: - As Month after Month passed away, the Wounds of her bleeding'.heart were partially I healed, and afloat she consented to'beeome the wife of him she had once refused for It !tiler. She told -him, however, that she When the first call wag WAYNESBORO', FRANKLIN COUNTY, PENNSYLVANIA, PRIDAY MOIINiNG; NOVEMBER 17; 1865- could never love him as should lave her husband, as her heart wail:mita In,,the 'grave of her first and only love. It was , the day before, the wedding and thetwo were tel. gether arranging their plans for the future, uddenl • her father entered,, and handed her a latistigt -- 'Reaxl:-that,--quiek_an_d tell me what it , means.' The . letter bore, the brew Yorro_postmark.,:and was directed in her husband's hand. She did not faint; but pale as death, she. tore off the envelope and,read: Toitni January 1865. 'My DEAR wirn ( :-=-1 am at 16t, exchanged. Am very feeble. As soon Dng. can bear the jouincy L shall be home,' The scene that follonn bed. The may ointed may betis cannot be descri• of the twice dimity ned, but he aeted:as a , and sincerely congratulated her on the safety of hal. husband. ' In a few weeks the husband, eame;.andthen the tnys. tery was explained On the morning of the battle he had given a letter from his wife to her brother to read. They soon became-sep arated. It was the brother that had been killed. lie, himself had been severely wound ed and taken prisoner. lie had written of ten, but the letters bad failed to reach their destination. After live years of suffering Worse than death he had been exchanged, and now was at home. Sorrow for the loss of the martyr ed brother alone marred 'the happiness of the reunited couple. T'hei'r noble and ddtoted friend remained to see the one he loved hap py with her hwband; and then left home to be a wanderer in the world, lie is now in the far West, and there ho seeks to forget the past in the excitement of frontier life.— Surely truth is, stranger than fiction. • John Adam's Courtship. John Adarns sought the hand-of-the dawn ter of Rev. Mr. Smith, of Weymouth, and Miss Abigail was pleased to accept the pro posal of Mr. Adams, much to the chagrin of the parson. the objection being that Adams was a man of humble origin and, moderate ability, and could never aspire to anything more . than the position of an humble village lawyer. His visits to her home were fre quent and prolonged, but no hospitalities were tendered by the Rev. Smith, either_to. Mains or his nag; for while A-blgail only. nut wale u care over him, his "bay" pass ed the weary hours of night in feeding on the hitebing post. Now, Abigail had a sister whose name was Mary, who was betrothed to a wealthier, and it was believed, more promising young man, whose presence was welcomed most cor dially by the reverend's family. - The good parson had promised each of' his daughters that on the occasion of their mar riage he would preach a sermon from a teat of .the bridesown selection. Mary first mar ried, and "beautifully appropriate' did the father think the text—';and Mary bath eho. sen that good parir In due time Abigail marries, and chooses for her text, "For; John ear n° neither eating nor drinking, and they say; he bath a devil." Tradition does not tell us as we remember, how the text.pleased the father, but-the sermon was preached Mary, indeed, chose a good- parti her life was a happy' one, and her husband was a man of means and respectability. .Abigail was a woman of strong affections, a practical wife, and possessed of great nobility of char acter, while the names of her husband and son will live as long as the love of liberty in spires the soul of man. Imaginary lllg In conformation of the oft-repeated fact, that a man frequently suffers as much from imaginary evils as real ones, we extract the following paragraph from a country paper:— A New England farmer started one very cold day in winter, wilh his sled and oxen into the forest, a halt' mile from home, for the purpose of chopping a load of wood. Hay ing felled a tree he drove the team along side and commenced chopping it up By an un lucky hit he brought the whole welch! of the axe across his to , A, with a side-long stroke- The immense gash so ,alarmed him as to nearly deprive him of all strength. lie felt the warm blood filling his shoe. With great difficulty he succeeded in rolling him self' on to the sled, and started the oxen for home. As soon as he reached the' door, lie called eagerly fur help. Ilia terrified wife and daughter, with much effort, lifted him into. the house, as he was wholly unable to help himself, saying his toot was nearly.sev ered from his leg. He was laid carefully on the. bed, groaning all the while very bitterly. His wife - hastily prepared dressings, and re moved the shoe and sock, expecting to see a desperate wound, when lo I. the skin was not even broken. Before going out in the morn ing,he wrapped hie feet in red flanticl, to,pro teat them from the cold; the gash laid this open to hie view, and.lie thought it flesh and blood. His reason not correcting the mis= take, all the pain and hiss of power which attends a real wound followed. I'D 'PATEL . = CARRY Fr.—Going from mar• ket one day, we observed a very small bpy, who gave no,special indication, by areas, or face; of other than ordinary training in life, 'tarrying a hablEct that was so heavy as near. ly to bear him, down beneath it. We ob. served, "My bey, you bare a heavy load." "Yes," raid he, "but I'd -rather carry, it than that my mother should". The remark was one ota.natare we . love to hear; but we do na know that we should have thought e nough of it to have chronicled it s had we not seen across the street a highly accomplished young lady, playing the piano while her moth'. er•was washing the windows. Why: is afield of grass like a person, older than yourself?- 13ecanse it is.past!iire-age. —NV,Ity is a photograph album the drainery on a bar counter? Because it is often' a receptacle for empty mugs, A. 'ZlE:miry , 14erottesItsiAlp6r I 1 4 4 1 0-t.tt*sisti - iii.l:Politicos rtd. "Eteligiacia. ingratitude to Paienta Thereis a proverb that , -"a-:-Lather can more,essily maintain six •children; ,:than six children one. father.".,Lather relates _this' story: There was once a father ivhn gave up everything to children"-'—his 'bduse, 's—fiettle his good's=-and expected for this the children wolitdr - suppett-Aim;—buta: iteE he had beetrfor some time with the son ,the -later grew tired, of hike, and said to `him, "Father, I haire'ind - a son'born -to* 'me this night, and there where your arm-chair Stands the cradle must come; will you not, perhaps, go tb my brother, wile has a large room?"-- After .he -had been some time with this, see and son, he also grew tired of bun, ,And said, "Father, you,like a warm room, sad that hurts my heed. Won't you go to nis , brother, the baker?". The father went, and after he, had been some time with the third son he also found him troublesome, and said to him, "Father, the people run in and out here all day as if it were a pigeon house, and you -cannot .have your noonday sleep; would you not ire better off at my pis= ter Kate's near the town wall?" The 'old man remarked tb himself, "Yes, I will do so; I will go and try it with my daughter:" She grew weary of him, and she was always so fearful when her father' went to church . or:anywhere else, and was obliged to de scend the steep stairs; and at her Elizabeth's there were no stairs to descend, as she lives on the ground floor. For the sake of iieiee the old man. assented and went-to the- other daughter; but after some time she too became tired of him, and told him, by a third per son, that her house near the, water.-was too damp for a man who . sullerered. .with the gout, and her sister, the grave-digger,s Wife, at John'e, had much' drier 'lodgings. The old man himself thought the was right, and went to his youngest daughter - Helen; but after he had-been three clays with her, her little son said to hie grandfather, "Mother said yesterday to cousin,Elizabethlhat there was no better chamber for you than sake one as father Dig's." These words broke the old Man's heart, so that he, slink back in his chair and died. Wanted—an Honest Industrious Boy. - *We - lately saw an advertisement headed as .. otaveys sive moral lesson. "An honest industrious boy" is always wanted. hie will be sought for, his services Will be on demand;'he will be respeete& and loved; Ile is spoken of in terms of high coin. mendation; ho will always have a -bottle ; he will grow up to be a man of known worth and established character. fle will be *anted. The merchant will want him for a satean►an or a'clerk, the mas ter mechanic will want him . for an appren tice or a journeyman) those with a job to let will want him for a contractor) clients ,will want him for a lawyer, patients will want him for a doctor; parents for a teacher of their children; and the people for an offi cer. He will be wanted. TOWEISMCD will want him for a citizen; acquaintances, as a neigh bor;, neighbors as a friend; families as a viai- Lai; the world as an acquaintance, nay, girls will want him for a bean, and finally for a husband, As honest,lndustrious boy 1 Just think of it, boys, will you answer this description? Can you apply for this situation ? Are you sure that you will be wanted ? You may be smart and active, but that does not fill • the requisition—are you honest ? You may be capable—Are :you industrious? You tray be well dressed and create a favorable impres sion at first sight—are you both honest and industrious ? You may apply for a "good situation"—are you sure that your friends, teachers, acquaintances can recommend you for these qualities 1 Oh, bow would you feel your character pot being thus established, un heating the words "I can't:employ your Nothing else will make up for the lack of these qualities. No,readiness or aptness for business will do it. -You must be honest and industrious—must wok and labor; then -will your calling. and trust be made sure. Who are your Companions It is said to be a property of the tree-frog that it acquires the color of whatever it ad heres to for a short time. Thus,when found on growing corn, it is eonunonly of• a dark green. It found on the white oak, it as sumes a color peculitir to that tree. Just so with men. Tell whom you choose and pro. fer as companions, and we certainly can tell you who you are like. Do you love the so ciety:of the vulgar? Thcu you are already debased in your sentiments. Do you seek to be with the profaner In your beart . you are like them. Are jesters and buffoons choice friends? lie who loves to laugh at folly is himself a fook Do you love and seek the society of the wise and good? Had you rath er take the lowest seat among those than the highest among others? Then you have al ready learned to "be - good. You may not haVe made Very .. nauch progress, but even a good beginning is not to be despised. Hold on your way and seek to be the companion of those that fear God. So yeti shall be wise for yourself, and wise:for eternity: LOVE OF Lirc.- 7 -With the exception-of-s -lew reprobates and freethinkers, ever-body ' wishes to go to Heaven: but the - most enthu- 1 siastie of us all; if he bad the choice, woald consent to go there as late as possible This perverse 'disposition to extend life he. yond t h at period in which the faculties he- gin to decay, like that of children, who hay ing eaten the apple, apply themselves vor aciously to devour the paring, is anything but tational; yet .so it is, we cl ing .with closes earnestness to thirriekety tenement ; es its dilapidation increases; and we are- never so anxious for a renewal of the lease as at the very moment when the edifice is cruet ling about our-ears. Patrick Henry, born 17:111; died 1799 oy an inipres T ifery • • . 'MEMORY AND HOPE. Oft at the hour when evening throws, be geth'ring shatFe o'er hill and daile, , 'Whilelaif the ieene • Alia - tam in sunlight -iiiiiki itiui The-tlienght of all lhat'liaa ' - And'harfed - and reared•cor Jags Icing way • • . (Rernembdnc(v.OFJPPiriatin;} , • .eome mingling with, the,close at day. , Mit, soft 'o'er esehleviviilg scene . The chast!ning hues .Of Memory. epteafl; And smiling„ j ettett dark. thought,,between Hope softens every tear we shed,.. ,, p, thus, when Death's long night entries on And he Afark shadell round ' • Mil parting beams frthra -Memdryi,s eun - 13loiid softly in Out evening shy! • - The Working Man He is the.noblcst man of, whom our free country eauboast; whether . at the workshop or ai the pro*, ,you Will find him the same tioblehearted, free - aea independent And if there' is a man in society upon whom we look with esteem and admiration, it is the independent sober working man., We care not whether he be a farmer, mechabie or common labdrer-L-Wlietha his toils are' 'en dnied 'in the WOrkshopithe field 5.0 the coal mine—whether his home is in,the backwoods or the neat cottage—our ,, adnairation, is the same. What a happy pietaz . he presents - ; What a raitird for his !abet:74olo, by his own unaided exertions-,•establishes for himself. a respectable Toshio's , in soelatp who, com.. mencing iu. poverty, by . his shill and, assidui ty, surmounts every obstacle; every .preju dice, and finally sueeeeds in forming. a char acter-whose value is enhanced by those who come after'grit. Such - -a min we price' as the noblest work of which nature is capable —the highest production, she can, boast.— iind let it be home it: Mind by the young working manjust entering'upon the stage - of life—let it ever lie at the fotindation and be the moving spring of nil his efforts—that for this situation he must strain every nerve to attain. It can be attained - by all. Untiring industry and virtuouS ambition never fail to find their-reward—they never - yet were ex- • 4• • : 1-rieati—aeterivill--be --- witi ebty acid justice find a house in the human breast. Otir Country. :Every citizen North and South, East and West, may take pride in saying •'this is my couutrj;" and give thanks for it to_ the „Mi ter of the Universe. Love of country is one of the primary - divinely cirdained •sentiments springing up in every generous bosom like the love of kindness, the love of friends, the love of God. It is not necessary that we should he able to' demonstrate •it the best country in the world=—that its features should he more grand, its mountains higher, its lakes larger, its rivers longer, its mines rich er, its fields more productive, its govern ment better, its people more free, and its properties in every nay excelling the best of other lands, for us to love it. We might love it better and more loftily if it were more excellent; but we should love it, and be thankful to God for it whether, compared with others, it were excellent or net.-- Charles Lamb says: "It matters not to tell me how many mothers in the world there are better than mine t She is my mother; that suffices ter me." So our country, is our mother. We are made of her dust by Gud, who is our Father. We are but unnatural children when she is not dear to us, And yet so far Is physical properties , are concerned, our country does excel She has the freshness and vigor of young life com pared with the worn out countries of the East.. They have had there morning and their noon of glory and are now in their de cay. I=l Otnt, Mmernts.—On a sandy plain, in the midst of n pine forest bounded by a• murky swamp, there is a pit filled with dead men's bones, unnumbered, uncounted, unnoticed, unrecorded, unnoted, without sculpture or the sacred rights of burial. By thousands, not dead by the bullet, uor stricken by dis ease from the hand ofOod—starved to death with the cruel torture of hunger, amid such plenty that an army of six myriads with its, cattle and horses, could subsist on the sur plus provision of the country in a rapid march past Andersonville—or murdered with frost under the shadow of the ht pines, which sang sad requiem to their—memories, as the winter . winds moaned through the branches, - whose very sighing called up in frenzy the happy homes nod warm hearts of the North •to, the wandering minds of the dying martyrs.— Gen. Butler. The beauty of a religious life is one of its greatest recommendations. What does it profess? Peace to all mankind. It teach e3 us those arts which will contribute to our present comfort as well as our future happi ness. Its greatest ornament is charity; it inculcates nothing but love and sympathy of affection; it breathes nothing but-the purest spirit of delight; in short, it is a system per- Wetly . calculated to benefit the heart, im prove the Mind, and enlighten the under standing: Every young marl is eagerly asking the best way of getting ou in life. The Bible gives a very short answer to the question:— .-Walk in the way of good men, and keep the paths of the righteous." A. great Many books of advice and - direction 'have been writ. ten, but here is the gist of it all: "Walk in the way of good men, and keep the paths of t lie:righteous." Why is the assessor'of taxes tho best lean in the world? Because he never uutlerates Anybody. Thomas Jefferson, born 1743; died 1820, L== Cake for tbe' 7yes.• ' Avoid • triading,bY oaiidle or it:rib - 44i ar tilloial light. Reeding by twilight ought neverld•be 411§0 In safe r,ule is—never read after sundown, or before:snarls°. . n'o'tDo , yorirself relti4 a 'moment in a roolininc? pobitiew . Whethei lA. bed iiri a • The preetify of/ - Tfilting, : on,. : ati a=back; or in any vehicle in motion by wheels, ikal most pordiciaits. - . • • „Reading_ on steam; or ,sail-vesse ls ; it . Of be., largely inifOged be`AUSS the , 'Slightest motion df the ' page or 'Your alteri the fecal point, and , requires a paiti-ful,, straining effort to readjust it .•• ~ • Never attenapt. to look at-,- the -sun while shining, unless through a colored glass some kind; even a very bright Mood shOtild lid felig-le gazed at. • The glare of, the sun.oa Water in Very in jurious to. the sight. • , , A sudden .change .botween,, , ,bright light and 'dark /leash. hi aratia;is 'verY , Iniootting at minute Objeetii, •rtiiibVe the eyes 'fiequentlythl turniag :tilde-:to seine thing in the distance. Let the light, whether . natUral 'or.artifteial fall on the page.frein behintka little to otie side. If the eyes are mattediogether arteceleep ing, :fft most. instaptaheons ands.ngteeabte solvebtitt ttatare'AS ?the , appliCatiba: of the oaliva with•the fmgeitt3fore openjtig the. eye. Never pick it off • With . the , fifignr :nail, but wash it off with the ball of the fingers., ,in quite warm soft water. • • • Never bathe or ripen this eyes in - cold wa ter. Itis always safest, best, and -mat a greeable„ to use, warm water.for ,that pur pose over seventy degrees; - -=:./lates Joyrnai of Bedlilt. , Bairlintoteh-Doublii Oharitoter.>: During the life of the rtotorionS pickpock. et, Barrington, an alarm was reiskkl, in ,the box-lobby of Covent Garden Theatre, that he was in the hou - Se. The news e'pri3ad floin box to box. One gentleman had lost his snuff-box, another his watch, one lady her puree, another—her-smelling.bottle; in fact, ev_e_ti_bady_ had_lost,—or—said---they—lra something. Behind Mrs. J. sat a gentleman in- black, who with much politeness commu nicated to her this dreadful intelligence. 'The villain!' said she snatching a splen did pair of IYrillialat earrings. out of her ears, and putting them carefully into her pocket book—'he shan't have my earrings, I prom ise.' Where the play was over, Mrs. J. adjourn ed to a rout, and upon entering the drawing room flew up ... to her dear friend, and told her what au escape she had had of that 'hor rid villain Barrington,' felicitating herself that she had not loot her drops, and as she could now with perfect safety hang out her gems, she thrust her hand into her pocket, but changed color and started. 'Be bas them!' said she, in agony. 'lmpossible,' said her sympathetic friend. Alasl it was too true; and upon diligent inquiry, it appeared that the very gentle man in black who had so politely cautioned Mrs. J, against Barrington, was Barrington himself, who, as soon as the laly had depos ited her brilliants in her pocket, had skill• fully-extracted them. Why Don't You Learn a Trade ? This question was propounded in our hear ing a few days since, to a young man who had been for several months unsuccessfully seeking employment as a clerk or salesman in one of our leading hauses. Complaining of his ill-luck, one of his friends who knew be had mechanical talent, bu t 'doubt ed whether he could make himself useful Dither as a clerk or salesman, put the in terrogatory to him which we have • placed as the caption of this article. The reply was that a trade was not so respectable as a mere cantile occupation. Under this delusive i dea, our stores arc crowded with young men who have no capacity for business, and who, because of the fancied respectability of do: ing nothing, waste away their minority upon their salaries which cannot possibly liquidate their expenditures. Late, too•late in life, they discover their error, and before they reach the ago•of thir ty, many of them look with envy upon the thrifty mechanics; wham in the days of their boyhood they were accustomed to deride.— The false view of respectability which pre vail soi distant fashionable society of the pre sent day, have ruined thousands of young men, and will ruin thousands more. TUE CnOLERA —Dr. Jordan, editor of the Indianapolis Gazette, who is represen ted to have been one of the most successful physicians in Cincinnati, in 1849, in the treatment of cholera, speaks as follows, in his journal, in reference to this terrible plague: In all probability it (the cholera) will be here next year, and it way be early in the spring or summer. We have had some ex perience in the treatment of this dreadful disease, in,1849, in Cincinnati, as some of our readers will prebably recollect, and we found one article of'very great importancii—that of prick/y ash berries. 4 il'e therefore, adiise druggists everywhere to secure as many- of these berries as they can, or et !east's reason able quantity. This can, be done by letting: the country people know about it, anti- they will gather them. Should• the cholera come, we shall certainly want some of these ber ries.' As to the manner of using them, it will be time enough to speak of that boreal= ter. A flowers never put- on thoir best clothes fox Sundays, but vrear their spotless raiment and exhale their odor every day; so lot your life, free from-stain, ever give forth the fra grance of goodness. Benjamin 'Franklin, born 170 G; died 1790 ''!Fear ' - 'NPI4IBER 22 M!RMI! Hero..., a Via relatOd, of Leid "Nelson, ' walking one morning he met a little girl cry- 2- . dog bitterly, itna.dpilli'asking her 'what was riattiti ibis replied that shelled 'ibtoken ittith'whA she ed 'been settt -- ' - : rok - wheii 'she - kofifitia Seeing ihirt - he ilynqiithized , kittliWlTillb held 'up theftsg;• - mentarind-ar-tleasly4a,id,'"-PAtibM , „m, can Meta. 1 - catrapt - Itlo . that, ,, giyoyou isiipciiee to lA's? "' OnqoolOng . in aurae, he four pk be had n,o7ilftkqe ' said, . "1 - eorifini glve i . h'rip'n'n*i**, biit if ..yoti will be here at Witt 'alai to ttrort'Msi,'l will meet - She' went . horrid conifoited, 'll'o told liar - mother the story with such zon#dence, that she was_ ex= wised frein. Cohditien :that the getiNiiiati'kei3l his word. __Rehire 'the time' rebeived a letter asking him to go to a distant place to meet it person' Whourliiiteatly desii4d to see L.—, lie hesitated, and thought that 'each a trifle " Cs' giiing a little girl a siipcitibc bu€lit riot to 4cep him away but thito he had given his 'Word acid the little. girl had iintilieitly relied upon it: No, he would not disappoint her, do he tial (low:Parki ivrota . to his 'friend that "ow log to a previous engagement," he should be unable to see hit i tit that . titna.'l &itch' an incident adds lustre to'tga wide of" vim iif ~Eirgluaii'a molt" tie , ' - '1)&0A.. "MIIMA er. fainily in la:Grosse, , Fittconsin, have • been missing,stove wood., for several weeks On the rettirit of one the incinbei's'of allitvfnighf wined, the ewe, was siated vind.Suoday„oig,ht a very pretty stick o'f Nei was' lift' With dibere'on the Wood tite.fatlek., Were two (maces of' pow der for.safe keeping. Aloilday the stick was iher&Z-Vegiday theitick was ihgre, and the laugh was getting on the man .that fixed.it. Wednesday morning the,stick was- gone.— Wednesday forootiOn an explosion was heard in a 'hous:o near by,-.aad a kiteken window- was spared no panes. ,On ping to the spot a sight might have been — seen. - The stove . d-a--pieree-e ortferen ce, A kettle of pork and eabbags shot up through the roof like an arrow. A dish of, apples stewing on thoatoie gave the ceiling the appearance of California. A. eat "sleeping under the stove went through the broken window as though after the devil or a doctor. The atlas not been lreard from since, but, a smell of burnt cathair pervades that house very thorough ly. A flat iron Was hoisted into pan of dough..=---a chair lost three legs, the wood box looks sick, while' the root , of the house looks like a busted apple dumpling. The occupant of the ruins says: "Such tunder never comes pefote or he puys.a lightnin rod, fry-tutu." Giatittaria,—Let every young man avoid all sorts of gambling as he would poison.— A poor man b 1 boy should not allow himself to toss up for a haif-penny, for this is often the beginning of a habit of gambling, and this ruinous crime creep , s•on by slow degrees. Whilst a man is minding" his work ho is play-• fog the game,lie.is sure to win. A gambler never makes any good use of his money e• von if ho should win. He Oily gambles the more ; and lie is often reduced to beggary and despair. This often tempted to corn taiterirnes for whioh his life is forfeited tb his country, or perhaps he puts an end to his miserable existence. If a gambler ;locos he injures himself, if he wins he injures a companion or friend. And could any hon est man enjoy money gained in such a way ? TUNIT AND AccotßlTAuttatv.—Tatrick, the widow Maloney toils me that you have stolen one of her finest pigs, is that so?' 'Yea, yer honor.' 'What have you - done with it ?' 'Killed (red ate it yer honor!' 'O, Patrick when you are brought face to face with the, widow and the pig on the judg ment day, what account. will you be able to to give of yourself when the widow accus es you of the theft?' '.Did you say the-pi; would be there, your riveroncer 'To be sure I did.' ''Well thin, yer riverenoe, say, Mrs. Maloney, there's yor pig.' A cat caught a sparrow and was abOut to devour it, but the . sparrow said: "No gentle man eats till he washes his face?' The eat, struck at this remark, het the sparrow down, and began to wash his face with his paw, but the sparrow flew away. , This vexed puss extremely, and 'he said : "As long. as I live ii will eat first and wash my face afterwards," which all cats do even to this day. " Sam Slick tells us that If ho were asked what death be prefelred,.as being moat in dependent, be, would answer, freezing; `he'would then ao a with a stiff 'up per lip." ('minister who had received a number of calla inid'could not hiirdli decide which wan best, askeekthe-advice of his faithful Arri. cawseryant; who replied,' J.-Massa. go Where ,e ups; dabble.' I=l . . • :All ‘men:lnek , to happineB9 in the future, To every eye, heaven and earth seem to em braet, hi the distoee. • . Jost llliinga ear, "When once axed. if I believed , in. the final lialratio of w e n, y et i . yea, but let tile . pick the men." A-receipt for inatantanqously *moving auperfinous hair- 7 -lindertake to k4a a spun ky wowed a4;iinat her will. A darkey's instructions for putting on a coat were: 'Fuse do.tigfat min, tied de left, and deo gib one general eonwelfthun.' Why is n rau.ionl inmtrinnout like ihe ok. en sea? Bceauseit's &ten sound-ed.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers