Village record. (Waynesboro', Pa.) 1863-1871, January 17, 1862, Image 1

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By W. '
VOL. IV.
SELECT POE
MU lig HOLLY BOUM
Yo Who have "seaknad each other
Or injured friend or brother,
In the past faded year;
Ye who, by Word or deed,
Rave made a kind heart bleed,
Come gather litre.
Let sinned against, and sinning,
Fortret their strife's beginning,
And join in ,friendship now;
Be Pnks nolonger broken,
Be sweet forgiveness spoken,
Under the holly, bortgh.
Ye who have toyed each other,
Sister and friend d brother,
In the toast faded year,
Mother and sire and child,
Young man and maiden mild,
Come gather here;
And let your hearts grow fonder,
As memory shall ponder
Each past unbroken vow.
Old Icive and younger wooing
Are sweet Tat the renewing
Under the holly bough.
Ye who have nourished sadness.
Estranged from hope and gladness,
In this past faded year,
Ye, with o'burdened mind
.Made aliens from your kind,
Come gather here.
Let not t h e useless sorrow
Pursfie you night and morrow
e'er you hoped, hone now—
Take heart, uncloud%yonr faces.
And join :n our embraces
Under the holly bough.
GPM GENTLY TO Mr VII%
Speak gently, kindly, to thy wife,
She knows enough or sorrow;
0 seek not from each little ill
An angry word to borrow.
The early light of houeehold love
Has more than golden worth,
W Bich from her heart ono smile of thine
Can call is. beauty forth.
When thou art distent,stern and cold,
And through harsh words of thine,
Its sunny ray of gentleness
At home may never shine.
Upon the heart such cold words fall
And chill love's tenlier life;
Oh, ever, w; , en home :risk come,
EpeaE gently to thy wife.
Is lie who breasts the storm
With manly courage when abroad,
And loving words at home,
Than he, who, groveling all his days,
A traitor to his kind,
A petty tyrant proves at home
The meanness of his mind.
SELECT MISCELLANY.
SMALL SAVINGS.
A PRACTICAL STORY.
0 11 don't see how Holmes does it," said
John 'Stetson, with a very puzzled ex
pression.
"Does what?" asked his wife, looking
up from her sewing.
'Why, save so much money from his
salary.
"Then he does save, does he?"
"You know the half acre lot adjoining
his house."
bores."
••Well. he has bought it for a hundred
dollars, and what is more, paid for it with
money saved out of- his salary for this
year."
•How does his salary compare with
yours?"
••lle has only seven hundred dollars a
year, while I have eight• Then our fam
ilies are the same; each of as has two Mil
dren."
"Yet 1 am afraid, you don't save near
that amount."
"No, I guess cot. The fact is. if I find
myself square at the-end of the-year,lthittk
I am lucky."
•And yet. John." said his wife gravely,
"It seems-to me u though we Ought to by
up something."
"It is easy enough 10 say so, but the
question •is, how are we so do it? There's
Margaret's music lessons at tea dollars a
quarter. That's the only way I can think
of, arid I shouldn't like to have those stop.
{led."
' "No, of course not; but isn't there any
other way?"
"Not that I know of."
"Don't you think. John that the little
inoidental expenses cost you more than
you think fur."
.11,i.W hat?"
~- " Digarshice cream, oysters, the theatre.
Ike.' • •
• , John winced o little., . .
',They are tribes." - he said carelessly.
!il'll: few cents each.. Pooh! They would
make precious little difference 'tithe end of
the year." •
---erYouAtnow .:there- ,Is .an Add..proverb,
431emr.4, little make* a mickle.' " , ,
q....Pbeamf I hale piliverbs! ffecanie
~AOeth :Wings are, really .of no : account." ' ,
?t! w Many cigar! .ilo you smoke dai
:.... . .
.•!.ktui'llow . *telnide-oo pay
• - *hetet" . . , ... .
- .. - foor . manta." - - -., . '-., -
•••..and -that , uld.make .twelve cents*,
1 AVI"
13 1 1.- ~
i ito
..•hat' twelve cents?",." '..
- "Not much initselfubut multiplied by a
:brier
'' number - t amounts to-a considerable'
sum'. . ,
,4!-What ocelots trying to irriie at, my
deal , womanV
am going to' make i prOpalition to
von."
""I'm all attention."
" You say you don't mind a few cents a
day."
"Then 1 propose , that a small box - be.
obtained.with a slit in the lid. just like the
children's tin savings box. in short, oak ,
larger-and that for every cent you 'spend
for cigars. ice•creatn, theatres. or any such
luxury. yon deposit art equal amount in the
box.
John laughed.
44 dare say," .he remarked. 'it would
bring me out a perfect Cuesus at the end
of the . year."
4•Do you agree?" asked his wife, with
some appearance of anxiety.
"Yes. I have no great objections. if you
desire it, 001 , 0 I acknowledge it seems a
little foolish."
' ' , Never mind abouV k lira. j , I have your
promise, and we'll try the experiment one
year. If it doesn't amount to enough , to
make it an object, then it will be time \tiz
give it. tip."
“You must take all the trouble of it. I
can't engage to do, anything about it, ex
cept to furnish the money when called for
' , That is all I segoof yea: But I
shall expect you every fig an -
count of all you - have disposed of, in t tee
ways, and be prepared with an actual a
mount of change for deposit.”
"Very web. I'd try. '
This conversation took place a t the
breakfast table. Having drained his sec
ond cup of coffee, John Stetson put on his
overcoat and took his way to his place of
business. 1 may as well mention in this
connection that he was eash;er of a back.
and as his duties occupied him but a few
hours in the day, he was more likely front
the leisure enjoyed,- to indulge in useless
expenses.
‘.114y wile is an enthusiast," said he 'as
he was walking down. schoiiever,her bob
by wont cost much, so I might as well in
dulge her in it."
Meanwhile, Mrs. Stetson proceeded to
the shop of a cabinet maker.
“I • want you, she said, to make a ma
hogany box, twelve inches long. - the other
dimensions being four inches. In the cen
tre of the top is to be a Olt large enough
to admit the largest coin."
"A money boar*.
“Yes.".
"It will be pretty large for that purpose
won oti"
..Rather," said Mrs. S . etson, smiVng.
..but better too large than too small."
John Stetson fell in with a coMpanion
in the afternoon with whom he Intd.,4 so
cial chit. As they were walking leisurely
along they passed an oyster saloon.
Stetson was particularly fond of the bi
,valves, and he proposed that they should
go in and have some.
To this his friend did not demur, and
they accordingly entered. Two plates of
'oysters came to twenty five cent.. Besides
• -
tibia they took a glass of ale each, which
made twelve cents more. This bronght
the bill up to thirty seven cents. which
Stetson paid. Accordingly. adding to this
twelve cents fur cigars, he deposited forty
nine cents in his wife's hands that evening
might as well make it fifty," said he
smiling.
""No. not a cent over. I want the sav
ings to represent exactly what you spend
on these little luxuries. and not a cent
more."
The next evening he had nothing to de
posit, ascent the usual amount for cigars.
""It won't amount very fast at that rate,"
said he.
••Never mind," said his wife, ••I don't
Wald you to increase your expenditures on
my account. lem inclined to think they
will not often be as small as they are just
nOw."
She was right.
The next day. being Wednesday. John
Stetson brought home a couple of tickets
for the theatre. it was benefit night and he
was anxious that his wife should go to it.
""How much did you pay for the tick
ets?"
••Fifty cents a piece."
“That will make a dollar. Please band
me the amount for deposit. ..
• '•Was th e theatre included?" said
John.
•'Certainly. That was expressly men
tioned.
!•oh. well then. so be it. Hare is a sit.
ver &Miser
The do lar was at once dropped into the
box.
rhe next day, while passing a confec
tionary window. Stetson noticed some fine
oranges.
"Just what Mary and the ehilren will
hka," thought he. "I'll go in and inquire
the price."
They were four cents apiece. He bo't
halt a dozen at a cost of a quariike. which
with his cigar money, left him thirty-sev
en cents to deposit.
The 111 eeeding day be spent nothing
except foe cigars.
On Saturday he stepped into a °onke
-1 tionary establishment. with a friend, and
bad a lunch. This brought the day'i an.
count to forty cents. .
When his wife added up the daily sums
l iar the week, she found. to her surprise.
litien;that she had received from.ber bus
band' twexiallars and sixty-two rental: .
;would -have--been asumisked..te bear
it, but nlie.thirught it beat Ant to aily any-.
thing - abmit it. He would'have - alleged
that it was a special case. as they did not
go to the theatre every week. this was
riiiniltr Newspaper a Neutral in l'alitias and naliirlo
PTIVIBBORO-IgiSILIN COINTT,,ONT4. P 111144 1; On . li, 1862; ;-
. .
tide; tint th en' tioinething to
ion!e of equivalent'aOsti Ewell aO a ride, or
show,sir a coneeit.
. .
iTil*.es4ked.,.. lllllB 7.•
The 146(3694, according to the bittsini
of giving his Wife as much as he spent for
incidental ispenies, no doilbt contributed
to check him somewhat, sothat he did not
spend more than two-thirds as much in
this way as he did before the agreement
still he- kept'up the average of the first
week.
We will now suppoise the seat. too hare
glided by. , John Stetion came into his
comfortable sitting room with a pre-Occu-
sir.
...VW at are you .thifiking of, asked his
"About the half acre lot adjoining the
one Holmes bought."
-Do you wish to purchase id"
01 should like to, but of course can't,
not having the money."
"How much d••• they ask for it?"
""Holmes paid a hundred dollars for his.
This on some accounts is .preferable, and
they hold it at one hzindred and, twenty
five dollars."
►P•I, aim you could raise the money,"
said - is wife quietly.
:By borrowing; I don't want to do
at.'
••You remember our hind?"
••Pshaw! that may amount to thirty or
forty' dollars."
•"Suppose we count it, as the year is up
to•day.' -
G•Well."
The ooz was opened, and husband and
wife commenced counting . . They soon
reached and passed forty dollars."
..Bless my soul ! I had no idea there
was so much."
What was his astonishment when the
total a mount in the box proved to be one
hundred and twenty•nine dollars forty•eight
cents.
• ..Yoe see you Can buy the lot," saki kill
wife.
•But haven't you swelled the arnonnt
from your own allowance?"
'•••Not a cent; and don't you see, John,
That s if yov hall refrained from half the ex
.penses we spoke of, we might• have in the
neighborhood t w o hundred dollars,
now?"
John Stetson did see it, and ( 1: -.. e deter
mined that the lesson should be a eervicev
hie one.
The half-acre lot was bought, and now,
at the end of ii ve years, it• worth double
e pal• or it. 'iT as aso sin a•
side two hundred dollars during this pa
riot!, and all by meal savings.
•
An acute critic has said that any one
1 who caught the spirit of the Sermon on
the Mouip. could not fail to be a gentleman.
There isuch truth in the remark, for the
Christian spirit which enjoins a careful
consideration of the feelings of others
makes its possessor polite alyd courteous.
An exchange sets forth some of the advan
tages of politeness, which costs nothing:
One of the Nnglish infidels was so struck
with the politeness and good feeling man
ifested in St. Paul's writings, that he af
firmed if St. Paul had said that he himself
had eververforinetf a miracle, te would
believe it. as he deemed him too much of a
gentleman to tell an untruth. W hatever
we mer think of this remark, we cannot
but be struck with the. power which pia
fewness had over the infidel. And as this
infidel is not an exception, it may be well
to show some few of the advantages of be
ing polite.
1. We conform to the Scriptures. If
St. Paul taught politeness by his example.
so did'he in his writing. He tells us. ""In
honor we must prefer one another."... Here
is the great secret of politeness, viz: For
of self. In another he says,
courteous." in other words be polite.
2. We make Mends. Nothing so wins
upon strangers as true politeness. A little
attention'shown in a stage, or in the care,
or at a public table. costs us very
W hat an effect it has upon the persons to
whom the attention is shown ! The-pleas
ed look, the gratified smile, show us we
kayo gained a friend.
3. We increase our usefulripss. One
reason why ministers and good Christian
people have no more influence is o: ac
count of their sour faces and forbidding
countenances. They look - as if they said
keep away from me. But if 1103 allow the
vulgar to approach within reach of their
majestic presence. there is a pompous man
ner or way they have. which prevents the
beans of others going out to Om& and
thus influence over such people is lost.
4. It gives success. 'Let any man Who
has goods to sell. or office to retain, be
kind and polite—no sham, like pin on
by the politicians—and hia goods ar. sold
and his office reached 'ten times son
than the man who looks mad •and COW you
op as he eats off his calicoes and cloths.
James Lull. of Pittsfield. Maine. eame
to his death. ander the following singular
cirenutstanees:—After he had retired 'to
bed with his grandfather, he complained of
being unwell. and, alter being queitioned.
confessed that be swallowed tee. tunes.
ei eels' metal bullets. ee metant-b
l balltonz—
We grandfather informed 'the boy'i fath
er What had been done...who. being some.
thing of a doctor,-sole! lila sop, with 'l ean
in his eye.. that the best he could do was
so prepare his mind for deatl4, for . il fie bad
dune what he 'aide, nu earthly po!4r,,Could
save hirs...:,-The ressoa.:the gate for
swallowing the stones was,' bettanse
wanted to do what a humbug sstzuwman
pretended to do at a cattle (air.
Politeness.
inn oft ptu,L
Whsle is ;Phi Vara ietre,
Oirlife's - dark :61114 stream,
Which is so quickly gone that WO
ACeOllll4 it Mato dream.,
'Tiabut s idcgle earnad,throh,
Or times old uon iidari, • - '
Which *Clem is, and strong. Is when
'taut with life did start.
What is .a 7 eert 'TIs bat a turn
Of Times old brazen Wheel,
Or but a•pane open the bdok
Nlthieh i lleatb mils' 'shortly sell
'Tis bat * step upon the road
liVbich we main Waved o'er;
A few more Steps and we shall Walk
Life's weary rounds Wo more.
Itlesvert.—Were there a ecinntry on earth
uniting all that is beautiful In nature, all
that is great in virtue; genies road the lib
eral arts, and 'lumbering among is citi
zens the most illustrious patriots, poets,
philosophers, and philanthlopists of our
age, how eagerly Would we cross to visit
it! And he* immeasurably greater is the
attraction of [leaven! There live the el=
der brethren of creation, the songs:of the
morningovho sang for joy at the creation
of our race; there the great and goad of all
ages and .climes: the friends. benefactors,
deliverers, ornaments of their race; the
patriarch, prophet, epistle and martyr;
true heroes of public. and still more, of
privateVe; the mother, wile, child, rho
unrecorded by mans have walled before
(od in the beauty of love and self:sacri
ficing virtue. There are all who have
built up in our hearts the power of good
ness and truth, the writers from whose
countenances have shed light through our
dwellings, and peace and strength through
our hearts. There they are gathered to
gether. safe from every storm, and trim
pliant over all `evil, and they say to us,
-.Come and join us. in our everlasting
blessedness; come and 'ear part in our
songs of praise; share our adoration. friend
ship, progressllnd work of love."
Hope is a wonderful gift of God, and
one ul the most powerful principles in. the
human mind. It is the grand support of
all mankind in tribulation; it is the main
spring of action throughout the earth; no-
thing like hope inspires courage in difficul
ties and dangers; and what but hope can
wipe away tears, and cheer the sorrowful
,jearll Hope for ,better things in time to
come, is the support of all sufferers in the
'lds ale..
world; it is also the,the and vigor of all
adventurers. %V e,sball iind,:hiti principle
at work everywhere. It is inscribed on
the prison -door, on the merchant's vessel,
on .the warriors banner. on the pilgrims
staff, and on the pillow of the dying. It an
imates die lawyer at the bar. the preacher
in the pulpit, the parent at the head of his
family, and the starving poor, while pas
sing through the dreary winter. We
pOugh in hope, we sow in hope; we live
in hope, and we die •in hope: Fill the
earth with hope, and you fill it *Ph life
and light, with vigor and exertion. Ban
ish hope from the earth, you fill Win a ma
ment full of darkness and deeps W here
hope dies; exertion ends, and a an is Lou.
vied In gloom and despondency. While
hope lives, man looks forward, and strives
to rise to hap pineal and glory.
CALL THEII AY TIMM meter NAMEIPAI
rotemporary is very anxious to have eve
rything called by its proper and legitimate
name. In a man steals call him a thief: if
he commits perjury. let him be known as
a perjured man; , ii he commits murder, let
him be 'mown and treated as all persons
convicted of . such a heinous crime are
treated; if he be guilty of treason and per
jury, let him be known, at least as suet'.
Men whti are known to sympathize with
the traitors in arms against the federal gov
ernment, and still remain kn the loyal
Eltates i and who boldly exult over any tem
porary success of the rebels; who talk trea
son 'whenever they think they can do so
without danger of arrest, and who, when
ever arrested. do not hesitate to take the
oath of allegiance to the federal goattraMent
and then boldly say they do not regard it
because it was -"forced upon them," are
poor "peace men." 444-
Many of theme men and women who are
moat brilliant. fascinating 'and gentle in
society at large. reserve their demon—
their eve/ temper. for some unfortunate
home slave. on' whom they think they can
vent it safely. since the Wretch doer . not ,
complain. A bad, temper prefers one. vie
link out of a Wilily: on that one it vents
its spite. indtilging all the :others, that a
may base deieaders'with the world.
Among the pitfalls '.io o way
-The best of ustwalk b
So math be wary, wet and pray,
And judge your Cher
The happiest of pillows is not that
which ;love first expresses; 'it is that which
death has frowned on ind passed over .
Peek your ea,res•lit as *mall a epees as
you can e so that you tan carry them your.
Sell, aid not let them annoy others. • •
Wheneer &duty 'sail foctinve,
Whit "sober judgment view it,
And never idly watt it 4=4
Pesin ♦t oxen and no •
The t years of a eieions man atirevei
miserable.' 'An ill spent lite. like as M
ourn mine, rune dollen at the heel.
'titan with •it 'small, bawl leekl and • lame
se;l tineeiii. iris bare ter melody; while: he
with bre intellect and small self Mem.
is.fearful of ling-one.
f . "i, •
41, Rood Joke all Round.
.
- There Is ,a quaint humor attached to
somebody connected With the Rocheitit
Express that bteake out in apote.ochasion
ally in that sheet, its'aithess the following:
• , ,iig'euttethin. (whose name we sup-
Preettforeobsious reasons.) while return
ing hcime with the Family pnrchsees On
ISettirdaY eiening.`attipped iste 'en eiyiter
i saltitin on Main' street to refresh hitneell
with a stew. While thos.nnitaged. - a friend
; Who had followed him in; abstracted from
•
t i
his groceries a package containing a p a nd
of ground coffee, and begin, emptie it,
refilled the paper with saw dust, an re
storeitlto its original place: The is
take was not d;scovered until the following
morning, when the wife of the 'injured
man' prepared' his breakfast: taborpig
undet the misapprehension that the po
ser had swindled him, the husband return
ed the sawdust in the morning. ana ifidig
tinnily demanded, and finally received; its
equivalent in old Java. •l'ne unhappy
te r, who is notoriously subject to' iris
" 4, -ent Mindedness.' declared most sol
emnly that_ it was unintentional, and , that
really, it was little the worst mistake he
ever committed ! What renders the trans
action still more perplexing . ii, that "fns
the life of him he can't remember when lie
got. Me eatequat!"
. for. Using Tobacco.
r In one of our neighboring towns the lads
bl a school acquired the habit of emoting,.
and resorted to the meet ingenious meth
ods to conceal the rice from the master.—
In this they were successful until one eve=
ning, when the master eaught•thenj at it.
and stood before them•in awful dignity.
4 , 110 r now, r shouted the master to the
first lad, ..hoir dare lea be smoking tubae-*
cot" •
"Bir."-inild the boy, "I am anbket to
headaches, and a pipetakes ofe thfi pain•"
"And von! and you? aril ,ou?",inquited
the pedagogue, questioning every buy in
his turn.
One had a• "raging tooth;" another "co •
lic;" the third a "cough;" in short they
all had something.
"Now, sirrah,' bellowed the master to
th 7 last boy, "what disorder do you smoke
f' 1".
Alas! the excuses were exhanited; but
th . interogated urchin. putting down hie
pipe after a farewell whiff; and looking up
in, If m nt
m ler's lace, said in a whinning.
si
pocrit a\ tone : •
• -- lEiSiiiiit o e for corns !"
Anecdote Of 11w Lane.
Jim Lane told this etory in his recent
speech at Dorton: 'I have hall a mind to
relate an anecdote to show how the slave
holders cling to their property. i Voices
—Do it; Do it Well, I will. We were
marching to Springfield—l was in the rear
of the column—ashen I was informed by
one of my men that a woman in great die.
tress wanted to see me: I lohl him to
bring her to me, and he did. She- was a
big, brawny woman. hat, and over forty.
and was crying. I asked her what the
matter was. She said. 'My two soap have
joined the Confederate: arm; an now
your soldiers have taken my two niggers'
Said 1, 'My good woman, that is. not the
worsething that could happen to von. I
am on the track of your eons. and 1 shall
probably catch them in a day or two and
hang them. [Laughter.] She threw her
arms about my neck and said: 'Genera)
Lane, you may do what you want with my
sons, if you'll return the niggers.' [ great
Laughter.] 1 disengaged myself from her
embrace, but didet pro , . ise to return her
nigge:s.' •
,COTTON TWA (''as6nn
de,:nitand that Gen. Ban called the
attention of Government to e merits of
SMithern Illinois as a colt, n field. It ap
pears that the entire eon try south of the
Ohio and Mississippi' ' ailrosil. is Boomed
to the cultivation of the fibre; and that
formerly nearly the whole population - was
engaged in its produ. On. Old cotton gins
and presses still exist on the older plants-
Lions. The area thus available is said to
be about 8.000.000 of acres. Tile itotton
is represented to be similar in kind and
staple to that grown in Tennessee. T. •
subjeCt has'been taken •up with much ani
mation by Stc.Seward, and other members
of the Cabinet; and it is understood that
abundant supplies of Cotton seed will be
sent out to Illinois from the Patent Office,
in order to - enable thtifarmers to re-estib
Gish the cultivation. - M the present pribes
of raw material the experiment will be
highly profitable.
Scratch the green-rind 'Upon a, sapling.
or wantonly twist it in tee -moil. and the
scarred sad crooked oak will tell of thee
for centuries to come. • Bow forcibly does
this besutilul, , figUre teach the Jesson'ol
giving right instead of
_wrong , k,ndeneies to
the young stied.
To veranathet.fiClQ teach him to wet us
again—rinjuries.awaken revenge , and even
an ant eau ming. asd a ily trouble our pa.;
tience
Fun' is worth more then - physic. and
who ever invent. 4W-diseases, a new sup
ply, deserves the name of a public Wale
(actor. , ,
If amen who has got to the .top of • the
Ity'llineetPlw ashamed to two. 'boot
am:Vika at"the liitity road he traveled...Am,
deeeiwili'mhbe::tikeit by the seek tad earl.,
ed dhoti. esti*.'
To he frelproue is 'rot al wily 'to be'ireig4 .
,
i1it.507140 AnnithC; th Advance
11=f=2112
' ' Bio-4,9** tiii,
What ie the beet, line to lead. a' alaq,
With akaseerinci-line.
TO prevent .a kitchen door from creak
ing._get a servant girl whose beau comes
to the house to See her.
A beauty is apt to trod do salt With her
eves, cheeks, or lipachut she upbraids her
hair.
At a" marriage 'ln a country .town, -after
►he ceremony( the'bride buss' imp tears of
course. Whereupon the bridegroom a
Swot six, footer. following the example,
blubbered like a calf, and on being reason.
tamed with, roared out:—.6l.et me slowed --
I feel as bad about it as she does, in
course!''
A Pate tivr.--Tlie Smith Carolina files
tuat.ers talk about being coerced to itay in
the Union. The anxiety to be coerced is
of the sami,kind as the strict property of
he single beau. After sitting uji 'a 'Ong
time. at a. respectable distance, she sud
denly squeaked out:
r.Qiit squeezing me? "
The startled Kentuckian exclaimed :
of haire't touched you."
"Well," said she, sion'ie a going to,
ain'k you f"
CIFALIFiED iN o RESPECT FOR PRE,
dent...l-An one respect at leasi," said Dr.
Spooner - to a person evekUstiug ly speaking—
aboto who had for near Mks years
grow led bikom, tne wood overlooking his
oterits: "In one eesperi, at least. you are
quelifivd to be Presidenk of the United
skates and all will admit ibis."
-.lrnank you. doctor," responded the
bore, much molli.ied; aehn; what particular
(ratification may that be"'
•iWhy; you are old enough," said the
doctor turning on hie heel.
'Where did you get that turkey I" said
eolOnel Billy Wilson to one of his amis.
Ale_reeruits;-ti-h4 canie-into_eamp_theilther
day with a tine bird.
..Stole it," wits thelaeonie answer.
644h, 1 ! said the Colonel triumphantly to
a bystander. “you see my boys may steal
but they *on't "
%Tao nECAN THE Wart !--An enraged
parent had jerked his ` provoking son across
iiis kiiee, and was opersiting on the expo.
sed portion or the tiyfihin's person , with
great vehemence. when the vonog one dug
into the parental lege; with his venomous
teeth. il—li's blazes! what'es you bide
me tor?" excliiiiiied the parent. 4W611 1
Osii, who hegiunet: this ete aai?' was .the
ulthin's reply.
Ab AarONISHIP.D ACIENT.--he a polite
ornnitms agent rras,goilig through the la
dies' car, checking baggage. he asked a
very pretty young lady •it she bad any
baggage she wished to:be trken to th 6 ho.
tel.
'
Not sir," was her replv.
The agent then asked tier if she desired
a 'Wet
She instantly gave• him a very sweet
smile, and replied.
•sNo. sit. t am not in the bussing humor
this evening."
The agent dropped hie memorandum
book. hastilv retired to the bigaGe car.
and said he fett
“I'nther,” said a young hopeful the -
other &v,••itow many fowls are :here on
this sable 1" ' , .%Y hy."' said the oldgenile
man, ay he looked eumpineently upon the
table. atbere are two,". 'env° !" replied
the sonar;-boy; 4.there are-three, sir. and
I'll prove it." Three," replied the old
gentleman who wee a plain matter-ofjact
man; **l'd like to see you prove it."—
iEasily done. easily done. Is not that
,fie V' said the smart bey, laying his knife
on the first.l.•eand that two," pointing to
the second; ••and. do not one and two make,
three 7" ••Really." said the lather. turn.
ing to his wife. who was
.stupefied with'
the imioense tearning'of her 'son,.
this boy is a genius. and deserves to be ,
encouraged;" and then to show that there
is fun in old folk* as well as young_ones,
hewilded," ••Wife. do you take one fowl,
and I'll take the second, and John may .
have the third for bas learning. -
Bashfulness, says L l / 4 „ - Juhisson, is a - dusk
hat hides and muffles merit.
To bumble outseises is the : only.,way
.
o rise.
TheY that do nothirg. , are is tba• wady
way to do that which is worse •than sotto
ing. - ' ,
A moo may be poor to parse. jet pivot
la spirit.
o , •
There may be prildii in riiige; he s eelitafs•
look, and lowly carriage. • /
There is no day 'born beicoasi like "a
Woke of musks into the-world and'aiup
self all-thlturay, through. •
Clattanovin..i..That. is O notable saihsg.
of an old French ettiter...ooTracte the his.
Sbt dra'villiaies yenVosit fled
diat hi. infancy hat hose:isseessaiskto,_
NO. 41