. , • _ • - I', .... . . - _ r . . • J..... r , .. . . . 4 ,; .o.' \ ': ' ' • ‘ . - .r _ . .. ~ .., , - -. • --.- .... •-• : - -.4 •'•• - • - -'.: -', - • ' •••• . ---.• • - 7 .' - ' : :..- ---, -- 1. j • etiP, ;•,, 4 . ). ....i '' N.4 j'' - 7. • , , ~ k•• , / ' . ' % 1 • ~ . ~. • 1 ;' 1 . .' . : . l ' . i ll ..; . . .. ; ' (. '. .4 . I. ' :. ;. " . ' 1 ..; ' 1 i v i v.i ••(„. ' - t`• - 1 , .j :. ~ - - ~ _ , , • • • 7 . 4. 1 .7.:-1 i .:.•• . . ./ .;' t ....' , - , -' '''' i • , 4,.. , . t .• .. - ' Ci l'' • : '' •,'"i , - , , -- i •.,--.- Iri , -- ': -• : 3 --• ' ..1 -- : - . - 1... • . , II ~ • 1 . 7. ; - ILI .., : 1.,..'-: ' 7" . -'''' l ' WAYNESBORO.' ',, ~ ~ -- , , ,-- •- • v,f , , • ,:; . 1t . .. ' •: 1 , . ~ ' i -%1 , •.- ti '' - - ', ' . ''''''''' '' ' '•' ' . '' ' ',. .„. . .i.); 1:1t t,, ~.., , ~ __, ~ f il 7 . • 7 ': ,n, . , - 4 . :::: ;, : 4#4 ‘ . :,... • _ . L. , . - '-''' ''' ' • 4 '4 ,,. '' N ' ' , ' '.: l '. , ' kL, - •'_, ,i r t.t. •• ' : ...1:-E ' .1 • ' . ' n'• ' "L ■):1...t. .. / ' ! •' 4 3 ~' '' ' i ". :'' cL. : ..'" '; L L. LI: j, '' ' : f7 ` l)r . • i' •i-L'' .. . ,rE ,E • ,' " . ~.. . ~, ,. .p E, -. . r,. ) ..L: : ,: ; . • '.4- .O.L, ,-0-./. ' ,! i ,:, . Ligr7i . : • . ..1 '.' I1,i• ; ' '..!S I , ' :7. ".,t : 7:7; ~,, i-,. . ... • • . ~, ". " : , . 1 1 .• .'1"."1. •', 'I - . . . , ~ .„, By W. ' VOL. IV. SELECT POE MU lig HOLLY BOUM Yo Who have "seaknad each other Or injured friend or brother, In the past faded year; Ye who, by Word or deed, Rave made a kind heart bleed, Come gather litre. Let sinned against, and sinning, Fortret their strife's beginning, And join in ,friendship now; Be Pnks nolonger broken, Be sweet forgiveness spoken, Under the holly, bortgh. Ye who have toyed each other, Sister and friend d brother, In the toast faded year, Mother and sire and child, Young man and maiden mild, Come gather here; And let your hearts grow fonder, As memory shall ponder Each past unbroken vow. Old Icive and younger wooing Are sweet Tat the renewing Under the holly bough. Ye who have nourished sadness. Estranged from hope and gladness, In this past faded year, Ye, with o'burdened mind .Made aliens from your kind, Come gather here. Let not t h e useless sorrow Pursfie you night and morrow e'er you hoped, hone now— Take heart, uncloud%yonr faces. And join :n our embraces Under the holly bough. GPM GENTLY TO Mr VII% Speak gently, kindly, to thy wife, She knows enough or sorrow; 0 seek not from each little ill An angry word to borrow. The early light of houeehold love Has more than golden worth, W Bich from her heart ono smile of thine Can call is. beauty forth. When thou art distent,stern and cold, And through harsh words of thine, Its sunny ray of gentleness At home may never shine. Upon the heart such cold words fall And chill love's tenlier life; Oh, ever, w; , en home :risk come, EpeaE gently to thy wife. Is lie who breasts the storm With manly courage when abroad, And loving words at home, Than he, who, groveling all his days, A traitor to his kind, A petty tyrant proves at home The meanness of his mind. SELECT MISCELLANY. SMALL SAVINGS. A PRACTICAL STORY. 0 11 don't see how Holmes does it," said John 'Stetson, with a very puzzled ex pression. "Does what?" asked his wife, looking up from her sewing. 'Why, save so much money from his salary. "Then he does save, does he?" "You know the half acre lot adjoining his house." bores." ••Well. he has bought it for a hundred dollars, and what is more, paid for it with money saved out of- his salary for this year." •How does his salary compare with yours?" ••lle has only seven hundred dollars a year, while I have eight• Then our fam ilies are the same; each of as has two Mil dren." "Yet 1 am afraid, you don't save near that amount." "No, I guess cot. The fact is. if I find myself square at the-end of the-year,lthittk I am lucky." •And yet. John." said his wife gravely, "It seems-to me u though we Ought to by up something." "It is easy enough 10 say so, but the question •is, how are we so do it? There's Margaret's music lessons at tea dollars a quarter. That's the only way I can think of, arid I shouldn't like to have those stop. {led." ' "No, of course not; but isn't there any other way?" "Not that I know of." "Don't you think. John that the little inoidental expenses cost you more than you think fur." .11,i.W hat?" ~- " Digarshice cream, oysters, the theatre. Ike.' • • • , John winced o little., . . ',They are tribes." - he said carelessly. !il'll: few cents each.. Pooh! They would make precious little difference 'tithe end of the year." • ---erYouAtnow .:there- ,Is .an Add..proverb, 431emr.4, little make* a mickle.' " , , q....Pbeamf I hale piliverbs! ffecanie ~AOeth :Wings are, really .of no : account." ' , ?t! w Many cigar! .ilo you smoke dai :.... . . .•!.ktui'llow . *telnide-oo pay • - *hetet" . . , ... . - .. - foor . manta." - - -., . '-., - •••..and -that , uld.make .twelve cents*, 1 AVI" 13 1 1.- ~ i ito ..•hat' twelve cents?",." '.. - "Not much initselfubut multiplied by a :brier '' number - t amounts to-a considerable' sum'. . , ,4!-What ocelots trying to irriie at, my deal , womanV am going to' make i prOpalition to von." ""I'm all attention." " You say you don't mind a few cents a day." "Then 1 propose , that a small box - be. obtained.with a slit in the lid. just like the children's tin savings box. in short, oak , larger-and that for every cent you 'spend for cigars. ice•creatn, theatres. or any such luxury. yon deposit art equal amount in the box. John laughed. 44 dare say," .he remarked. 'it would bring me out a perfect Cuesus at the end of the . year." 4•Do you agree?" asked his wife, with some appearance of anxiety. "Yes. I have no great objections. if you desire it, 001 , 0 I acknowledge it seems a little foolish." ' ' , Never mind abouV k lira. j , I have your promise, and we'll try the experiment one year. If it doesn't amount to enough , to make it an object, then it will be time \tiz give it. tip." “You must take all the trouble of it. I can't engage to do, anything about it, ex cept to furnish the money when called for ' , That is all I segoof yea: But I shall expect you every fig an - count of all you - have disposed of, in t tee ways, and be prepared with an actual a mount of change for deposit.” "Very web. I'd try. ' This conversation took place a t the breakfast table. Having drained his sec ond cup of coffee, John Stetson put on his overcoat and took his way to his place of business. 1 may as well mention in this connection that he was eash;er of a back. and as his duties occupied him but a few hours in the day, he was more likely front the leisure enjoyed,- to indulge in useless expenses. ‘.114y wile is an enthusiast," said he 'as he was walking down. schoiiever,her bob by wont cost much, so I might as well in dulge her in it." Meanwhile, Mrs. Stetson proceeded to the shop of a cabinet maker. “I • want you, she said, to make a ma hogany box, twelve inches long. - the other dimensions being four inches. In the cen tre of the top is to be a Olt large enough to admit the largest coin." "A money boar*. “Yes.". "It will be pretty large for that purpose won oti" ..Rather," said Mrs. S . etson, smiVng. ..but better too large than too small." John Stetson fell in with a coMpanion in the afternoon with whom he Intd.,4 so cial chit. As they were walking leisurely along they passed an oyster saloon. Stetson was particularly fond of the bi ,valves, and he proposed that they should go in and have some. To this his friend did not demur, and they accordingly entered. Two plates of 'oysters came to twenty five cent.. Besides • - tibia they took a glass of ale each, which made twelve cents more. This bronght the bill up to thirty seven cents. which Stetson paid. Accordingly. adding to this twelve cents fur cigars, he deposited forty nine cents in his wife's hands that evening might as well make it fifty," said he smiling. ""No. not a cent over. I want the sav ings to represent exactly what you spend on these little luxuries. and not a cent more." The next evening he had nothing to de posit, ascent the usual amount for cigars. ""It won't amount very fast at that rate," said he. ••Never mind," said his wife, ••I don't Wald you to increase your expenditures on my account. lem inclined to think they will not often be as small as they are just nOw." She was right. The next day. being Wednesday. John Stetson brought home a couple of tickets for the theatre. it was benefit night and he was anxious that his wife should go to it. ""How much did you pay for the tick ets?" ••Fifty cents a piece." “That will make a dollar. Please band me the amount for deposit. .. • '•Was th e theatre included?" said John. •'Certainly. That was expressly men tioned. !•oh. well then. so be it. Hare is a sit. ver &Miser The do lar was at once dropped into the box. rhe next day, while passing a confec tionary window. Stetson noticed some fine oranges. "Just what Mary and the ehilren will hka," thought he. "I'll go in and inquire the price." They were four cents apiece. He bo't halt a dozen at a cost of a quariike. which with his cigar money, left him thirty-sev en cents to deposit. The 111 eeeding day be spent nothing except foe cigars. On Saturday he stepped into a °onke -1 tionary establishment. with a friend, and bad a lunch. This brought the day'i an. count to forty cents. . When his wife added up the daily sums l iar the week, she found. to her surprise. litien;that she had received from.ber bus band' twexiallars and sixty-two rental: . ;would -have--been asumisked..te bear it, but nlie.thirught it beat Ant to aily any-. thing - abmit it. He would'have - alleged that it was a special case. as they did not go to the theatre every week. this was riiiniltr Newspaper a Neutral in l'alitias and naliirlo PTIVIBBORO-IgiSILIN COINTT,,ONT4. P 111144 1; On . li, 1862; ;- . . tide; tint th en' tioinething to ion!e of equivalent'aOsti Ewell aO a ride, or show,sir a coneeit. . . iTil*.es4ked.,.. lllllB 7.• The 146(3694, according to the bittsini of giving his Wife as much as he spent for incidental ispenies, no doilbt contributed to check him somewhat, sothat he did not spend more than two-thirds as much in this way as he did before the agreement still he- kept'up the average of the first week. We will now suppoise the seat. too hare glided by. , John Stetion came into his comfortable sitting room with a pre-Occu- sir. ...VW at are you .thifiking of, asked his "About the half acre lot adjoining the one Holmes bought." -Do you wish to purchase id" 01 should like to, but of course can't, not having the money." "How much d••• they ask for it?" ""Holmes paid a hundred dollars for his. This on some accounts is .preferable, and they hold it at one hzindred and, twenty five dollars." ►P•I, aim you could raise the money," said - is wife quietly. :By borrowing; I don't want to do at.' ••You remember our hind?" ••Pshaw! that may amount to thirty or forty' dollars." •"Suppose we count it, as the year is up to•day.' - G•Well." The ooz was opened, and husband and wife commenced counting . . They soon reached and passed forty dollars." ..Bless my soul ! I had no idea there was so much." What was his astonishment when the total a mount in the box proved to be one hundred and twenty•nine dollars forty•eight cents. • ..Yoe see you Can buy the lot," saki kill wife. •But haven't you swelled the arnonnt from your own allowance?" '•••Not a cent; and don't you see, John, That s if yov hall refrained from half the ex .penses we spoke of, we might• have in the neighborhood t w o hundred dollars, now?" John Stetson did see it, and ( 1: -.. e deter mined that the lesson should be a eervicev hie one. The half-acre lot was bought, and now, at the end of ii ve years, it• worth double e pal• or it. 'iT as aso sin a• side two hundred dollars during this pa riot!, and all by meal savings. • An acute critic has said that any one 1 who caught the spirit of the Sermon on the Mouip. could not fail to be a gentleman. There isuch truth in the remark, for the Christian spirit which enjoins a careful consideration of the feelings of others makes its possessor polite alyd courteous. An exchange sets forth some of the advan tages of politeness, which costs nothing: One of the Nnglish infidels was so struck with the politeness and good feeling man ifested in St. Paul's writings, that he af firmed if St. Paul had said that he himself had eververforinetf a miracle, te would believe it. as he deemed him too much of a gentleman to tell an untruth. W hatever we mer think of this remark, we cannot but be struck with the. power which pia fewness had over the infidel. And as this infidel is not an exception, it may be well to show some few of the advantages of be ing polite. 1. We conform to the Scriptures. If St. Paul taught politeness by his example. so did'he in his writing. He tells us. ""In honor we must prefer one another."... Here is the great secret of politeness, viz: For of self. In another he says, courteous." in other words be polite. 2. We make Mends. Nothing so wins upon strangers as true politeness. A little attention'shown in a stage, or in the care, or at a public table. costs us very W hat an effect it has upon the persons to whom the attention is shown ! The-pleas ed look, the gratified smile, show us we kayo gained a friend. 3. We increase our usefulripss. One reason why ministers and good Christian people have no more influence is o: ac count of their sour faces and forbidding countenances. They look - as if they said keep away from me. But if 1103 allow the vulgar to approach within reach of their majestic presence. there is a pompous man ner or way they have. which prevents the beans of others going out to Om& and thus influence over such people is lost. 4. It gives success. 'Let any man Who has goods to sell. or office to retain, be kind and polite—no sham, like pin on by the politicians—and hia goods ar. sold and his office reached 'ten times son than the man who looks mad •and COW you op as he eats off his calicoes and cloths. James Lull. of Pittsfield. Maine. eame to his death. ander the following singular cirenutstanees:—After he had retired 'to bed with his grandfather, he complained of being unwell. and, alter being queitioned. confessed that be swallowed tee. tunes. ei eels' metal bullets. ee metant-b l balltonz— We grandfather informed 'the boy'i fath er What had been done...who. being some. thing of a doctor,-sole! lila sop, with 'l ean in his eye.. that the best he could do was so prepare his mind for deatl4, for . il fie bad dune what he 'aide, nu earthly po!4r,,Could save hirs...:,-The ressoa.:the gate for swallowing the stones was,' bettanse wanted to do what a humbug sstzuwman pretended to do at a cattle (air. Politeness. inn oft ptu,L Whsle is ;Phi Vara ietre, Oirlife's - dark :61114 stream, Which is so quickly gone that WO ACeOllll4 it Mato dream., 'Tiabut s idcgle earnad,throh, Or times old uon iidari, • - ' Which *Clem is, and strong. Is when 'taut with life did start. What is .a 7 eert 'TIs bat a turn Of Times old brazen Wheel, Or but a•pane open the bdok Nlthieh i lleatb mils' 'shortly sell 'Tis bat * step upon the road liVbich we main Waved o'er; A few more Steps and we shall Walk Life's weary rounds Wo more. Itlesvert.—Were there a ecinntry on earth uniting all that is beautiful In nature, all that is great in virtue; genies road the lib eral arts, and 'lumbering among is citi zens the most illustrious patriots, poets, philosophers, and philanthlopists of our age, how eagerly Would we cross to visit it! And he* immeasurably greater is the attraction of [leaven! There live the el= der brethren of creation, the songs:of the morningovho sang for joy at the creation of our race; there the great and goad of all ages and .climes: the friends. benefactors, deliverers, ornaments of their race; the patriarch, prophet, epistle and martyr; true heroes of public. and still more, of privateVe; the mother, wile, child, rho unrecorded by mans have walled before (od in the beauty of love and self:sacri ficing virtue. There are all who have built up in our hearts the power of good ness and truth, the writers from whose countenances have shed light through our dwellings, and peace and strength through our hearts. There they are gathered to gether. safe from every storm, and trim pliant over all `evil, and they say to us, -.Come and join us. in our everlasting blessedness; come and 'ear part in our songs of praise; share our adoration. friend ship, progressllnd work of love." Hope is a wonderful gift of God, and one ul the most powerful principles in. the human mind. It is the grand support of all mankind in tribulation; it is the main spring of action throughout the earth; no- thing like hope inspires courage in difficul ties and dangers; and what but hope can wipe away tears, and cheer the sorrowful ,jearll Hope for ,better things in time to come, is the support of all sufferers in the 'lds ale.. world; it is also the,the and vigor of all adventurers. %V e,sball iind,:hiti principle at work everywhere. It is inscribed on the prison -door, on the merchant's vessel, on .the warriors banner. on the pilgrims staff, and on the pillow of the dying. It an imates die lawyer at the bar. the preacher in the pulpit, the parent at the head of his family, and the starving poor, while pas sing through the dreary winter. We pOugh in hope, we sow in hope; we live in hope, and we die •in hope: Fill the earth with hope, and you fill it *Ph life and light, with vigor and exertion. Ban ish hope from the earth, you fill Win a ma ment full of darkness and deeps W here hope dies; exertion ends, and a an is Lou. vied In gloom and despondency. While hope lives, man looks forward, and strives to rise to hap pineal and glory. CALL THEII AY TIMM meter NAMEIPAI rotemporary is very anxious to have eve rything called by its proper and legitimate name. In a man steals call him a thief: if he commits perjury. let him be known as a perjured man; , ii he commits murder, let him be 'mown and treated as all persons convicted of . such a heinous crime are treated; if he be guilty of treason and per jury, let him be known, at least as suet'. Men whti are known to sympathize with the traitors in arms against the federal gov ernment, and still remain kn the loyal Eltates i and who boldly exult over any tem porary success of the rebels; who talk trea son 'whenever they think they can do so without danger of arrest, and who, when ever arrested. do not hesitate to take the oath of allegiance to the federal goattraMent and then boldly say they do not regard it because it was -"forced upon them," are poor "peace men." 444- Many of theme men and women who are moat brilliant. fascinating 'and gentle in society at large. reserve their demon— their eve/ temper. for some unfortunate home slave. on' whom they think they can vent it safely. since the Wretch doer . not , complain. A bad, temper prefers one. vie link out of a Wilily: on that one it vents its spite. indtilging all the :others, that a may base deieaders'with the world. Among the pitfalls '.io o way -The best of ustwalk b So math be wary, wet and pray, And judge your Cher The happiest of pillows is not that which ;love first expresses; 'it is that which death has frowned on ind passed over . Peek your ea,res•lit as *mall a epees as you can e so that you tan carry them your. Sell, aid not let them annoy others. • • Wheneer &duty 'sail foctinve, Whit "sober judgment view it, And never idly watt it 4=4 Pesin ♦t oxen and no • The t years of a eieions man atirevei miserable.' 'An ill spent lite. like as M ourn mine, rune dollen at the heel. 'titan with •it 'small, bawl leekl and • lame se;l tineeiii. iris bare ter melody; while: he with bre intellect and small self Mem. is.fearful of ling-one. f . "i, • 41, Rood Joke all Round. . - There Is ,a quaint humor attached to somebody connected With the Rocheitit Express that bteake out in apote.ochasion ally in that sheet, its'aithess the following: • , ,iig'euttethin. (whose name we sup- Preettforeobsious reasons.) while return ing hcime with the Family pnrchsees On ISettirdaY eiening.`attipped iste 'en eiyiter i saltitin on Main' street to refresh hitneell with a stew. While thos.nnitaged. - a friend ; Who had followed him in; abstracted from • t i his groceries a package containing a p a nd of ground coffee, and begin, emptie it, refilled the paper with saw dust, an re storeitlto its original place: The is take was not d;scovered until the following morning, when the wife of the 'injured man' prepared' his breakfast: taborpig undet the misapprehension that the po ser had swindled him, the husband return ed the sawdust in the morning. ana ifidig tinnily demanded, and finally received; its equivalent in old Java. •l'ne unhappy te r, who is notoriously subject to' iris " 4, -ent Mindedness.' declared most sol emnly that_ it was unintentional, and , that really, it was little the worst mistake he ever committed ! What renders the trans action still more perplexing . ii, that "fns the life of him he can't remember when lie got. Me eatequat!" . for. Using Tobacco. r In one of our neighboring towns the lads bl a school acquired the habit of emoting,. and resorted to the meet ingenious meth ods to conceal the rice from the master.— In this they were successful until one eve= ning, when the master eaught•thenj at it. and stood before them•in awful dignity. 4 , 110 r now, r shouted the master to the first lad, ..hoir dare lea be smoking tubae-* cot" • "Bir."-inild the boy, "I am anbket to headaches, and a pipetakes ofe thfi pain•" "And von! and you? aril ,ou?",inquited the pedagogue, questioning every buy in his turn. One had a• "raging tooth;" another "co • lic;" the third a "cough;" in short they all had something. "Now, sirrah,' bellowed the master to th 7 last boy, "what disorder do you smoke f' 1". Alas! the excuses were exhanited; but th . interogated urchin. putting down hie pipe after a farewell whiff; and looking up in, If m nt m ler's lace, said in a whinning. si pocrit a\ tone : • • -- lEiSiiiiit o e for corns !" Anecdote Of 11w Lane. Jim Lane told this etory in his recent speech at Dorton: 'I have hall a mind to relate an anecdote to show how the slave holders cling to their property. i Voices —Do it; Do it Well, I will. We were marching to Springfield—l was in the rear of the column—ashen I was informed by one of my men that a woman in great die. tress wanted to see me: I lohl him to bring her to me, and he did. She- was a big, brawny woman. hat, and over forty. and was crying. I asked her what the matter was. She said. 'My two soap have joined the Confederate: arm; an now your soldiers have taken my two niggers' Said 1, 'My good woman, that is. not the worsething that could happen to von. I am on the track of your eons. and 1 shall probably catch them in a day or two and hang them. [Laughter.] She threw her arms about my neck and said: 'Genera) Lane, you may do what you want with my sons, if you'll return the niggers.' [ great Laughter.] 1 disengaged myself from her embrace, but didet pro , . ise to return her nigge:s.' • ,COTTON TWA (''as6nn de,:nitand that Gen. Ban called the attention of Government to e merits of SMithern Illinois as a colt, n field. It ap pears that the entire eon try south of the Ohio and Mississippi' ' ailrosil. is Boomed to the cultivation of the fibre; and that formerly nearly the whole population - was engaged in its produ. On. Old cotton gins and presses still exist on the older plants- Lions. The area thus available is said to be about 8.000.000 of acres. Tile itotton is represented to be similar in kind and staple to that grown in Tennessee. T. • subjeCt has'been taken •up with much ani mation by Stc.Seward, and other members of the Cabinet; and it is understood that abundant supplies of Cotton seed will be sent out to Illinois from the Patent Office, in order to - enable thtifarmers to re-estib Gish the cultivation. - M the present pribes of raw material the experiment will be highly profitable. Scratch the green-rind 'Upon a, sapling. or wantonly twist it in tee -moil. and the scarred sad crooked oak will tell of thee for centuries to come. • Bow forcibly does this besutilul, , figUre teach the Jesson'ol giving right instead of _wrong , k,ndeneies to the young stied. To veranathet.fiClQ teach him to wet us again—rinjuries.awaken revenge , and even an ant eau ming. asd a ily trouble our pa.; tience Fun' is worth more then - physic. and who ever invent. 4W-diseases, a new sup ply, deserves the name of a public Wale (actor. , , If amen who has got to the .top of • the Ity'llineetPlw ashamed to two. 'boot am:Vika at"the liitity road he traveled...Am, deeeiwili'mhbe::tikeit by the seek tad earl., ed dhoti. esti*.' To he frelproue is 'rot al wily 'to be'ireig4 . , i1it.507140 AnnithC; th Advance 11=f=2112 ' ' Bio-4,9** tiii, What ie the beet, line to lead. a' alaq, With akaseerinci-line. TO prevent .a kitchen door from creak ing._get a servant girl whose beau comes to the house to See her. A beauty is apt to trod do salt With her eves, cheeks, or lipachut she upbraids her hair. At a" marriage 'ln a country .town, -after ►he ceremony( the'bride buss' imp tears of course. Whereupon the bridegroom a Swot six, footer. following the example, blubbered like a calf, and on being reason. tamed with, roared out:—.6l.et me slowed -- I feel as bad about it as she does, in course!'' A Pate tivr.--Tlie Smith Carolina files tuat.ers talk about being coerced to itay in the Union. The anxiety to be coerced is of the sami,kind as the strict property of he single beau. After sitting uji 'a 'Ong time. at a. respectable distance, she sud denly squeaked out: r.Qiit squeezing me? " The startled Kentuckian exclaimed : of haire't touched you." "Well," said she, sion'ie a going to, ain'k you f" CIFALIFiED iN o RESPECT FOR PRE, dent...l-An one respect at leasi," said Dr. Spooner - to a person evekUstiug ly speaking— aboto who had for near Mks years grow led bikom, tne wood overlooking his oterits: "In one eesperi, at least. you are quelifivd to be Presidenk of the United skates and all will admit ibis." -.lrnank you. doctor," responded the bore, much molli.ied; aehn; what particular (ratification may that be"' •iWhy; you are old enough," said the doctor turning on hie heel. 'Where did you get that turkey I" said eolOnel Billy Wilson to one of his amis. Ale_reeruits;-ti-h4 canie-into_eamp_theilther day with a tine bird. ..Stole it," wits thelaeonie answer. 644h, 1 ! said the Colonel triumphantly to a bystander. “you see my boys may steal but they *on't " %Tao nECAN THE Wart !--An enraged parent had jerked his ` provoking son across iiis kiiee, and was opersiting on the expo. sed portion or the tiyfihin's person , with great vehemence. when the vonog one dug into the parental lege; with his venomous teeth. il—li's blazes! what'es you bide me tor?" excliiiiiied the parent. 4W611 1 Osii, who hegiunet: this ete aai?' was .the ulthin's reply. Ab AarONISHIP.D ACIENT.--he a polite ornnitms agent rras,goilig through the la dies' car, checking baggage. he asked a very pretty young lady •it she bad any baggage she wished to:be trken to th 6 ho. tel. ' Not sir," was her replv. The agent then asked tier if she desired a 'Wet She instantly gave• him a very sweet smile, and replied. •sNo. sit. t am not in the bussing humor this evening." The agent dropped hie memorandum book. hastilv retired to the bigaGe car. and said he fett “I'nther,” said a young hopeful the - other &v,••itow many fowls are :here on this sable 1" ' , .%Y hy."' said the oldgenile man, ay he looked eumpineently upon the table. atbere are two,". 'env° !" replied the sonar;-boy; 4.there are-three, sir. and I'll prove it." Three," replied the old gentleman who wee a plain matter-ofjact man; **l'd like to see you prove it."— iEasily done. easily done. Is not that ,fie V' said the smart bey, laying his knife on the first.l.•eand that two," pointing to the second; ••and. do not one and two make, three 7" ••Really." said the lather. turn. ing to his wife. who was .stupefied with' the imioense tearning'of her 'son,. this boy is a genius. and deserves to be , encouraged;" and then to show that there is fun in old folk* as well as young_ones, hewilded," ••Wife. do you take one fowl, and I'll take the second, and John may . have the third for bas learning. - Bashfulness, says L l / 4 „ - Juhisson, is a - dusk hat hides and muffles merit. To bumble outseises is the : only.,way . o rise. TheY that do nothirg. , are is tba• wady way to do that which is worse •than sotto ing. - ' , A moo may be poor to parse. jet pivot la spirit. o , • There may be prildii in riiige; he s eelitafs• look, and lowly carriage. • / There is no day 'born beicoasi like "a Woke of musks into the-world and'aiup self all-thlturay, through. • Clattanovin..i..That. is O notable saihsg. of an old French ettiter...ooTracte the his. Sbt dra'villiaies yenVosit fled diat hi. infancy hat hose:isseessaiskto,_ NO. 41