9 k= Lo (3) ® The Dallas Post Dallas, PA Wednesday, April 10, 1996 5 Jack Hilsher In keeping with my desire to raise the culturallevel of this page (and, that of my readers) again some light verse: Men seldom malke passes, At girls who wear glasses. If you thought, “Dorothy Parker” you'd have been right. Those rather famous lines, penned some 80years ago by Mrs. Parker, may never die, unless contacts take over completely, which I am assured is not very likely. Another: A single flow’r he sent me, since we met. All tenderly his messenger he chose; Deep-hearted, pure, scented dew still wet - One perfect rose. I'kkow the language of the Jlow- eret; “My fragile leaves, heart enclose.” with "it said, “his LIBRARY NEWS By NANCY KOZEMCHAK The ‘Guess the number of pen- nies in the jar contest’ at the Back Mountain Memorial Library came to an end on March 31. The total amount of pennies in the jar was 2,036; which surprised many of us. There were more than 150 entries in the contest. The first place winner was Yvonne Marshall who guessed 2,045; just nine pen- nies more than the total. We gave prizes towinners. Sara Swepston, Grace Ciak and Matthew Ford all guessed 2,001; Maria Stevens, Sherry Riley, Melissa Novitski, Jackie Lowe and Chrissy Carboni all guessed 2,000; and John Pa- thos guessed 2,100. This jar filled with pennies was donated to the Send The Post to a friend It makes a great gift Call 675-5211 for details r- = SENENE - 14% JEWELRY ,¢* For Mother's Day, Prom, Le Weddings 675-3105 Rt. 415 Memorial Hwy, || €4 11 Bridal [rinkets I ; Dallas, PA 18612 L. Dallas;PAt8S12 | Banners-Magnetics-Neon Vehicle-RV-Big Rig-Boat Wooden-Plastic-Metal Labels-Engraving-MORE Complete SIGN Service Order by FAX: 675-0574 FREE Delivery!! OPEN SAT. 8 AM-Noon Combine your auto and homeowners insurance policies into ONE Comprehensive Coverage Competitive Rates CNA's Universal Security Policy (0721/8 Slocum Insurance Agency, Inc. 575 Memorial Hwy. Dallas, PA 18612 675-1167 Parker was one perfect rose Love long has taken his amulet One perfect rose. Why is it no one ever sent me yet One perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it’s always just my luck to get One perfect rose. Alexander Wolcott wrote: “I think it not unlikely that the best of Mrs. Parker's work will be conned a hundred years from now. If so, I can forsee the plight of some undergraduate in those days being maddened by an assign- ment to write a thesis on what manner of woman the dead and gone Dorothy Parker really was. Was she a real woman at all? He will naturally want to know. And even if summoned from out tombs, we will not be sure how we should answer that question.” As for me, I wouldn't even try. (Dorothy herself simply said, “I'm just alittle Jewish girl trying to be cute.”) Let it be enough to say she was one of a group of writers who helped editor Harold Ross found the great New Yorker (at least it was great then). She wrote short stories, reviewed plays and pro- duced light, satirical verse. And of course, those cutting remarks... Like: A woman said, “I can't come to your party, I can't bear fools,” so Mrs. Parker replies, “That's strange, your mother could.” And: Clare Booth Luce drew Dorothy's hatred of pretense. When told that Mrs. Luce was always kind to her inferiors, Mrs. Parker asked, “Where does she find them.” And once they arrived at a nightclub door at the same time, Mrs. Luce bravely saying, “Age before beauty.” Mrs. Parker swept by saying, “And pearls be- fore swine.” And: “You can lead a horticul- ture butyou can’t make her think." I've read Erma Bombeck, who is very funny but she is a colum- nist, and the others who try to be funny and aren't, and I've yet to find Mrs. Parker's equal. She did not have avery good life, ending at 74 a bitter and alcoholic recluse with several suicide attempts be- hind her. You could see them coming. One poem, “Resume” was pro- phetic:” Razors pain you Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren’t lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful You might as well live. We're glad you did, Dorothy Parker. Marshall guesses correct number of pennies in jar library by a patron, for which we are very grateful. The jar has been cleaned out and ready to be used again. The month of March was the ‘Pennies for Periodicals’ campaign for our green jar donations. The total received for that project was $36.30. The green jar project is an on-going container which ac- cepts bills and coins for special library projects, a ‘Friends of the Library’ membership campaign. New large print books at the library: “Morality Play’ by Barry Unsworth is the story of a young priest Nicholas Barber, fearing the bishop's wrath for breaking his vows of chastity, he takes up with a group of traveling players in plague ridden 14th century En- gland. “This Same River Twice” by Alice Walker is a book composed of selected entries from the author's journals, letters and essays. It chronicles her transition from re- cluse to public figure following her success. “Legacies” by Janet Dailey is a novel of history and emotion and also a glorious love story of a man and a woman divided by indi- vidual loyalties struggling to find one another again in a time of turmoil and upheaval. “Home Fires” by Luanne Rice is a powerful and moving novel; with a sharp eye for details of daily life, the eccentricities of ordinary people and the major dramas that both divide families and bind them together. “Hunter's Moon” by Karen Robards is about a spirited young woman with a painful past and a lonely but determined FBI agent, that ignites this riveting new novel of romantic suspense, including bloodshed and terror. Use the coupon on page 2 to subscribe FiNO's PHARMACY at the light in Dallas IS NOW ACCEPTING The Geisinger Prescription Program - Plus - Health America * US Healthcare Blue Cross Prescription Program 1st Priority Blue Cross and Blue Cross HMO Aetna ...and most other prescription programs 675-1141 Lad les Wardrobe Sale 30-40% Off Suggested Retail arge Selection of pring Fashions 4 ROUTE 6, DICKSON CITY JUST 1/4 MILE ABOVE THE VIEWMONT MALL! SUBURBAN CASUALS 501 S. STATE ST., CLARKS SUMMIT EXIT 58 OFF I-81, 1 MILE NORTH OPEN 9-6 DAILY, OPEN 9-9 DAILY, 11-5 SUNDAY 9-8 THURSDAY, 11-5 SUNDAY John W. Johnson While much of what we do and say suggests otherwise, the real- ity is that perfection is an illusion. Still, the quest for perfection continues. Perhaps, and because it is at the root of our societal values, the most sought after per- fection is our pursuit of educa- tional excellence...a laudable goal, if the illusion is understood for what it is, and the ‘best we can be’ is an acceptable substitute. However, even that laudable goal falls short of even an illusion of perfection when looking at our public education system. Indeed, we continue perpetuation of the illusion that quality (as opposed to quantity) can be achieved through public education. This contradiction begins with the perfecton declared in this nation’s Declaration of Independence...that all are cre- ated equal. All are not created equal. And itis charitable to even suggest that all are even remotely equal. All humans are born with different strengths and weak- nesses. That's empirically self- evident. But in pursuit of the notion that public education is among the principal sources of strength in a republican democ- racy, we nevertheless perpetuate the illusion of perfection; we have institutionalized the idea of per- fection to the point where, among other things, young people com- Public education can avoid: institutionalized mediocrity mit suicide over bad grades. Afurther misadventure into the quest for perfection is that—and instead oflearning these issues at home—public schools now try to deal with issues affecting personal behavior and/or social interac- tion, i.e., the teaching of ethics. As such, I'm reminded of the writer John Steinbeck who said in Cannery Row: “The things we admire most in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understand- ing and feeling are the concomi- tants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharp- ness, greed, aquisitiveness, mean- ness, egotism and selfinterest are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first, they love the produce of the second.” We teach word and deed that striving for success is worthy, and then denigrate the very qualities which, within our system, achieve success. As such, afraud is being committed upon the intelligence of the entire nation as we mouth rhetoric about quests for perfec- tion/excellence, and turn a blind eye and deaf ear to the mediocrity our educational system is actu- ally producing. This happens because parents don’t want to be told their chil- dren are not doing well; parents want to hear exactly the opposite, because parents have bought into this cockeyed notion of perfec- tion. The fraud is most apparent to those who must try and teach beginning college students; stu- dents who are woefully unpre- pared to do college level work be- cause those students were cush- ioned from reality in primary edu- cation by something called “grade inflation”, areducing of standards to the point where a former D is now a B. Looking at the numbers Heo this clear; high school students nationally score a B average, and yetonly five percent of high school students can do college level math, and only 40 percent have college level verbal and cognitive skills. Somebody is lying to somebody here. And it's clearly the nation's educators and parents in a mu- tual self congratulation society, while the rest of the world not only is maintaining higher primary education standards, but also doesn’t don the robes of an ill- conceived idea about perfection in developing and maintaining those standards. Given our inequality as hu- mans, public education, by defi- nition, and in order to in fact be public, must tailor its product to the least common denominator. Still, the rhetoric for perfection continues while the reality of me- diocrity grows. And while there is something to be said for public education being a strength in our republican democracy, it must also be said that without high standards expected by parents and executed by educators, there is no choice but to see the educa- tional emporer for what he is. Naked. Naked, while the minds of our children are freezing to death in the intellectual hand-me-downs of institionalized mediocrity. THANKS Thanks for egg hunt support, and a vow to do better Editor: The Back Mountain Business Association would like to thank all those who volunteered to help out with the Easter Egg Hunt on Saturday, April 6th. A special thank you to Penn State, Lehman for use of their grounds and area Back Mountain businesses that donated prizes. We would also like to extend our appreciation to all the par- ents and children who showed up to participate in the egg hunt, our first ever. We were gratified and overwhelmed by the level of inter- est the event created. We also, however, share the disappoint- ment of some knowing that even one child might not have enjoyed the event as much as we had hoped. As aresult, of the turnout THE LATE ™ GREAT RATE. One day only: Friday April 12. One branch only: 124 Memorial Highway, Dallas. We're staying open til midnight to offer you this terrific rate on a 12-month regular CD or IRA CD. Stop by to open yours or call 717-675-0213. we are quite aware of the tremen- dous interest that such events can create within the community. And we are committed to ensur- ing that the second annual Easter Egg Hunt in 1997 is a “smashing success”. Thank you again for your interest and support. Mary Ellen Giannuzzi Chairperson BMBPA Egg Hunt Committee C 20° ® 12-MONTH CD Special April 12 Hours: 8 AM-12 MIDNIGHT Commonwealth Bank: Minimum deposit $2,000.00. 5.20% Annual Percentage Yield only available on 4/12/96. Limited time offer. Not valid with any other offer. Early withdrawal penalty may be imposed. a division of * @ Meridian” Member FDIC
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