10 The Dallas Post Ba a, Dallas, PA Wednesday, October 4, 1995 LX > Fall Bridal Showcase a" TTS CCL Rh ™ - a By Priscilla Lister Copley News Service © You want your wedding to be as perfect as possible, but your par- _ents are divorced, haven't spoken ‘to each other in years, have both ‘remarried and you don’t know how ‘to handle this sticky situation. Or your groom's parents have “much more money than your own, ‘yet tradition dictates that the ‘bride’s parents pay for the wed- ding. Do you have a choice? “.Or you're thinking of faxing “form letters to ease the burden of ‘all those thank-you notes. It's the “latest technology, but is it proper “protocol? Letitia Baldrige, author of the ‘newspaper column on etiquette, "“RSVP,” syndicated by Copley “News Service, whose latest book is “Letitia Baldrige’s New Complete ‘Guide to Executive Manners ‘(Rawson & Associates), is the first “to acknowledge that times have changed since she first started ob- “serving behavior 25 years ago. “Life adapts, etiquette and man- ‘ners adapt to the realities of life,” she says. “Rather than trying to stop or fight it, we have to adjust to itr But in adjusting to changing ‘times, etiquette still has its place, “especially at weddings. And Bald- ‘rige has some valuable advice for those seeking that memorable oc- "casion where sticky situations are “handled appropriately. “It all boils down to one thing: “Everyone should subjugate his or "her hurt feelings, desires for re- "venge or criticisms for the good “and happiness of the bride and ~groom,” Baldrige says. “It’s a time for burying family feuds.” * If both the bride’s parents are divorced, for example, “invite . them both. | ' Natural parents are natural par- ‘ents in spite of what happens to . their marriage. Invite both of them . and their present spouses no mat- fl | ter how much you might loathe those present spouses,” says Bald- nge. «She advises that the nicest way "to handle divorced parents and * their new spouses at the wedding «itself is to seat the natural parents ~ .in the front row of the church with . the new spouses sitting behind. * “A lot of people can’t do that, ~ however, in which case it’s all right “for the father of the bride to sit "with his new spouse in the second “row. But you cannot have the new - wife of the father of the bride sit- ting in the first row with the moth- “er of the bride; the new spouse has “to sit in the row behind.” =~" RAR SS We set the standard : for Bridal and After Five Jewelry J ; & More carries the largest variety of styles and colors and has the best selection for your entire wedding party Featuring the exclusive line of qd GIAVAN ~ Swavorski Crystal « Mother of Pearl Silver & Gold * Clip & Pierced | Traditional & Contemporary | See our large collection of affordably priced Bridal Accessories 311 Market St, Koral's Complex Kingston, PA 18704 Ask for JoAnn (717) 288-7088 ‘Make your wedding extra special with 15% OFF any purchase over $50. 00 PUP SS Cl NL SA a = = 4 Lede Sees e st. Delicious; isitely: Ask for George ; LL. + Call 823-3400 ‘EB OPEN » TUES.-SUNDAY 5:00 AM. TO 9:00 P.M. 290 S. River St., Plains BY THE CROSSVALLEY BRIDGE Or what about the situation where the groom has children by a former marriage and you both want them to be there. “The bride-to-be should write a letter to the ex-wife and say she knows it’s not a time of great joy for her, ‘But I love your children, I will be good to them, I promise, all my life, and it will mean a lot to me to have them come to our wed- ding. I hope you will be kind enough to let them come.’ Very few ex-wives can resist a letter like that,” says Baldrige. In those receiving lines at the reception, natural parents of both the bride and groom should stand in them, with stepfathers and step- mothers roaming around being helpful. “If the wedding reception is held in the home of the father of the bride and his new wife, she may stand in the receiving line as the first person because it’s her home, and she’s welcoming guests there,” . adds Baldrige. The worst behavior she’s ever seen, she said, “was the stepmother of the bride, the new wife of the father of the bride, openly pro- claiming loudly after too many drinks that her husband and she had paid for the whole wedding reception and why wasn’t she giv- en more prominence on the invita- tion and by standing in the receiv- ing line?” But Baldrige prefers to focus on the positive side. “I've seen people misbehaving, but I've also seen people act with" brilliance and kindness — even dead-set enemies smiling through it for the bride and groom. Boy, is that a joy to see.” As for those issues of money, “Work out every cent long before plans are made,” Baldrige advises. “Draw up a budget. If the groom’s family has lots of money but the bride’s family doesn’t, outline the options. Point out that you can have a tiny wedding that the bride’s parents can pay for, or a great big wedding that will make the groom’s parents look really good in their community. Sit down and talk dollars and sense, and let them pay for it if it matters.” The tradition of the bride and groom dancing the first dance at the reception still has its place, Baldrige says, “although that’s not followed much anymore; usually everyone starts dancing right away. But the whole tradition of the bride and groom having the first dance, followed by the father of the bride cutting in on them as the groom takes his mother on the floor, is a whole tradition of par- ents exchanging and it’s still very nice.” And if the couple has been living together for several years before their wedding, which is more and more common, guests don’t have to throw rice and petals at them when they leave the reception these days. “But it’s nice to see them off and wish them luck and happiness,” she adds. “Those who write about man- ners change, too. But we have to keep priorities in mind. There's nothing more important than thank-you notes,” she says. The hurt feelings are real of peo- ple who spent money and time on a big wedding present who never get a note for it. Expert tips on new wedding etiquette “Or if they get a form letter, which some young people are do- ing today, in which their name is written in and the note doesn’t even mention the present, is worse than not thanking at all in my book,” she says. 915 Exeter Ave. Exeter, PA Area's Best Selection of Bridals, Maids, Headpieces, Tuxedos and Area's Lowest Proms at Prices de Announce the happy news with fashionable Birchcraft Wedding Invitations. Choose from our large selection of beautiful styles. Dale's Office Supply 631 Memorial Highway Dallas, PA 18612 675-4620 % & at U.S. TUXED Genettr’s Pictorial Wedding Stories. Skilled Professional Photographers pm —— 32 Ee SO ST OP eT i if Photographs - * e All Kodak products * Printed in our lab with : 3; the latest in computerized: processing equipment Albums rad * Library or perma bound ~ .¢ ~ * Only the finest PATA A nota a CC SC CD a Pott PHOTOGRAPHY ~~} Serving Wyoming Valley For Overy 40 years ~~ = 138 S. Pennsylvania Ave. * Son 824-0906 Steven's run Town & Country Cleaners. :: Country Club Shopping Ctr. * 675-0468 "| A beautiful MEMOry is worth saving Preserve the wedding day loveliness of your bridal gown for the next generation with our exclusive bridal gown / cleaning and preservation service. ::} After gentle cleaning, your gown :°/ EAR SE TE Re a - = X = “fy- ER hat cab Ti fu ge gh gh sk ch SS dolachacdh st lS Se Si 4 Fos Wg + AAV ers cn ad 808 AE Steven's TaN Town & Country Cleaners Check Out Our New Store Hours Mon. - Fri. 7AM. - 7 P.M. ¢ Sat. 8 AM. - 6 PM. The Professional Edge, The Personal Touch &hgd A member of the International Fabricare Institute, iF the association of professional drycleaners and launderers. J EE A RR EE ESE I RE a al nl gh a aad SP AA pe 5 \S ( PS 4 se a ATATER .- Flowers have been our business for more than 70 years. Let us help you reflect the beauty of the most important day of your life. Experience, Quality & Service Hill the Florist 3 North Pioneer Avenue, Shavertown 696-1178 A Perfect Wedding It takes careful planning to make your wedding : | perfect. We can help with our large selection of, |} | wedding invitations, announcements, napkings Ego and a complete line of accessories to fit any | wedding theme and every pricerange. |} | FoF SE Sh El Sus GE SE SE Sh Se He CEETT IS TTT \ i PUSS SI SE WE SE a a All our prices are discounted |} Stop in today | RECISION [ITHO-GRAPHICS || 24 Lake Street, Dallas \ | oe Today thru Friday 9:00 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. © I | or call for an appointment ! 675-2324 _ WEDDING FANTASY SPECIAL || : Yu Receive an additional $5.00 Off ~ SR your order of $25.00 Eo | or more with this ad. Offer expires 12/31/95 ; [} hs ——
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers