- Page8b @Who pays for the wed- ding? What are the duties of the Best Man? What should I wear to be correctly attired? Those are but a few of the questions which may puzzle prospective bride- grooms. Most of the answers to those questions have pat answers, many of them having been handed down from antiquity, oth- ers being relatively modern in conception. The American Formal- wear Association, being expert on the rules and moreés of weddings and their attendant rules and obligations, has compiled a list of the most often asked questions by grooms and the AFA has supplied the answers that currently apply to them. Some who can afford it go to wedding counselors to find out what to wear, what to do and how to do it. The following will answer most, i if not all, of the ques-- >» tions that the average groom may pose: Q.: Who or what decides if the wedding is to be for- mal, semiformal or infor- mal? A.: Those decisions are usually up to the bride, and are often determined by the choice of gown that she wears and the site of the ceremony. If she wears a long gown with a train, the ceremony is definitely formal. If the bride elects to wear only a veil with her gown, the cer- emony can be considered to be semi-formal. Q.: If the wedding is for- mal, what do I wear? A.: In the daytime, a cut- away coat and striped trou- sers. However, in some contemporary weddings the groom will wear a white tailcoat, but traditionalists hold out for the gray cuta- way. For a contemporary evening formal ceremony, the groom may wear a black or white full dress (tailcoat), while the tradi- tionalist will wear the clas- sic white tie and tails. Q.: If the wedding is semi-formal, what do I wear? A.: For a traditional day- time wedding, a gray strol- ler with striped trousers. For a contemporary day- time wedding, a tuxedo of your choice or an updated stroller. For a traditional evening ceremony, a black tuxedo or a white dinner jacket. For a contemporary even- ing wedding, a tuxedo of your choice. Q.: What do my ushers or groomsmen wear? A.: In a traditional cere- mony, the same as the groom, with the exception of the boutonierre which in the groom's case should be a sprig of lily-of-the-valley from the bride’s bouquet. In a contemporary wed- ding, the groomsmen may dress ‘‘a step down’’ from the groom. I.e., if the groom wears a tailcoat, the groomsmen may wear a short coat. Q.: What do the fathers of the bride and groom wear? A.: The same rules apply to the fathers as to the ush- ers and the groomsmen. Q.: Do I give a present to the bride? A.: As a rule, the gift of the wedding ring is consid- ered to be sufficient. How- ever, there is no rule against offering her a further token of your devo- tion. Q-: Do I owe a gift to any of the wedding members? A.: Yes. Some small gift should be made to your ushers or groomsmen. Dress studs, cuff links, pocket jewelry or the like is appropriate. Those gifts serve as mementos of the occasion. Q.: Who decides on the type, place and length of & the honeymoon? A.: Those decisions should be made by agree- ment between the bride and groom. Its type is usually determined by financial capabilities and the avail- able time for the trip. Q.: Who provides the bride’s bouquet? A.: The groom buys his bride’s bouquet and also the usher’s boutonierres. Q.: Who pays for the honeymoon? A.: The groom! Q.: Who gives the hono- rarium to the officiating reverend or judge? A.: The groom. Q.: Who pays for the rental of the formalwear? A.: The groom and the members of the wedding each pay for their own. : Who pays for the we Sng ? A.: The bride’s family. Q.: What are the duties of the Best Man? A.: The Best Man attends the groom prior to ceremony, hands him the ring to place on the bride’s finger during the ceremony, and offers the first toast to the bride and groom at the reception. He also reads, to all assembled, any and all con- gratulatory messages sent to the bride and groom at the reception. Q.: If I am a member of the military, is it correct for me to be married in uni- form? A.: Inthe U.S., one usu- ally only wears a uniform if on active service. In that case itis correct to wear full dress (if you have it) or, at least, your Class A's. If your attendants are also in the service they should be similarly attired and officers may wear swords or sabers. Except for regulars, uniforms are best avoided in peacetime. 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