left to right: L.ehman; Toni Kapsales, Meyers; Hoban; Lynn Jemo, Hazleton. Yvonne Katsock, Bishop Hoban; Coughlin; L PPR L, A *1.00 A GALLON ston. JoAnn Gonchar, Bishop Jane Potance, Bishop Hafey; Hazleton; Wyoming; ROUTE 315 WILKES-BARRE (ACROSS FROM TREADWAY INN) EXIT 47 W — OFF INTERSTATE 81 —— PHONE —— 822-1188 or 654-9707 OPEN DAILY 9 A.M. to 9 P.M. Noon +16 DON'T LET OUTRAGEGUS GASOLINE PRICES RUIN YOUR FAMILY'S BEAUTIFUL PRESTIGE POOL IN- STEAD OF YOUR CAR AND REALLY ENJOY LIFE. WHEN YOU PUT IT ON PAPER A EY [Ie POOL [Le I EF XH Lol H 4° A GALLON IN TODAY'S INFLATIONARY TIMES THAT'S A BARGAIN! FINAL Package Includes: ® MUSKIN POOL (Deluxe Frame) ® HEAVY DUTY WINTERIZED LINER © DELUXE SAFETY LADDER © TELESCOPIC VACUUM POLE ® DELUXE VACUUM HEAD e VACUUM HOSE e TEST KIT ® FILTER MEDIA eo BACKWASH HOSE eo OWNERS MANUAL '® CUSTOMER SAVINGS BOOKLET GUARANTEED IN- i GROUND POOL 3 DAYS (PACKAGE DEAL = $900 *589 (PACKAGE DEAL) = 5447 *650 (PACKAGE DEAL) [1 chuon] A GALLON = 5 5 4 16’ x 31’ INGROUND POOL 22° A GALLON COMPLETELY RY p-NEH 10) Judi Krause, Kyle Skrinak, Hazleton; Joyce Davis, It almost hurts to talk about it. Consider the story about the California field worker who got bit by a black widow spider while making a noon stopover ‘at a por- table toilet. What about the jailed drunk who tripped on his out a gold tooth on a toilet seat. Or the story about the sun worshipper who burned his chest on the hot. Exhaust system of a gar- run ‘over him at the oh And how can we forget about the ‘poorield seam- stress who felts ‘the presence’ of a ‘darning needle she sat on years earlier. ' Makes you want to rub the backside to make sure everything is okay. You can imagine what the claim representatives for Aetna Life & Casualty must have gone through when they reviewed these |cases. Aetna processes millions of claims an- |nually, and while many are ‘routine, some are just too precious to pass over. Here constables who thought they caught a band of thieves red-handed loading the contents of a home into a van. One of the thieves con- vinced the police officers he actually was the homeowner and was, unhappily, claiming what was his = after a bitter divorce. The embarrassed lawmen made their exit, but not before offering to assist the burglars. The ' reported missing. ~ Geta head start on aweekend 8 Wherever this week- ' end takes you, go there in an MGB. It puts the ¢ fun in your driving! MIDWAY MOTORS, INC. © 2010 Wyoming Ave. | Wyoming, Pa. 18644 287-3114 Then there was the lovesick: male pooch who smashed through the front door of a home which contained a female of the species. The two canines never rendezvoused. The homeowner stopped the excited intruder in front of the door to the garage, where the female was chained, before it was destroyed too. A New Jersey policyholder filed a claim affer an appropriately- named throw rug slipped out from underneath = a house guest. The claimant said the guest ‘‘spilled” blood all ‘over: her nice wallpaper. How's that for a in the early days of the automobile, it was always horse. Well, last year, a New York nag won the contest. A car traveling along a bridle path startled the horse and its rider.. The horse reared; its master tumbled onto the manure- rider started making ob- scene remarks, the horse reared again, leaving his calling card, in the form of hoofprints, on the side of the car. The “I thought It Was a Brilliant Idea’ award may get it FREE. who tried to defy winter by placing an electric blanket over his VW engine. On rising one morning, he found the car engulfed in flames, probably from ‘a short circuit. Consider, if you will, the man, who while on his constitutional, walked into a tree and filed for damages. He said dust and noise erupting from a minor demolition project down the block startled him and sent him into the collision course. Talking about startled people, you must feel some sympathy for the woman right in the front seat of her car. The feline made tracks on the woman’s neck after being rudely awakened from a sleep in the backseat. The sudden rush by the cat resulted in the driver being propelled forward. Some of her front dental work was rearranged after hitting the steering wheel. The inebriated fellow mentioned in the beginning was jailed for his own safekeeping, and his shoelaces were routinely removed. You see, the police didn’t want him to hurt himself. The gold tooth, by the way, was lost down the commode. Before the aforemen- tioned garbage truck’s exhaust system burned the chest of the beach goer, the poor guy was straddled by the large vehicle while he slept. Talk about rude awakenings. And for the sore seam- stress. She claimed that a doctor left part of a surgical needle in her rump, and filed a malpractice suit. Testimony revealed, however, she sat on ¢ needle years ago. s the dog who fiberglass bumpers. Ac- pooch took after the claimant’s customized van and after forcing it to stop, ripped apart the special flared bumper. A dog isn’t necessarily a van’s best friend. Adios until next year, Famous American author-playwright John O’Hara was born in 1905 in Pottsville, Schuylkill County. The O’Hara house on Manantongo Street has been placed on the National Register of Historic Places. (Next to Caddie LaBar’s) 675-4960 _ | hy
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers