FPEELfIIS TPEBUNE. ESTABLISHED 1888. PUBLISHED EVERY MONDAY, WEDNESDAY AND FRIDAY, BY TUB TRIBUNE PRINTING COMPANY, Limited OFFICE; MAIN STREET ADOVB CENTRE. LONG DISTANCE TELEPHONE. SUBSCRIPTION' RATES FREED AND.— The T RIUUNE is delivered bj carriers to subscribers in FrfcoHnd at tho rats of 121$ cent- per month, payable every fcwx months, or Si 50 s year, payable in advance. The TIUBUNE may he ordered direct form ths carriers or from tbo office. Complaints of Irregular or tardy delivery service will re. oeive prompt attcntiou. BY MAIL —The TuincNE is sent to out-of town subscribers for 81.6 1 ) a year, pnyablo in advance; pro rata terms for shortor periods. The dnto when the subscription expires is on the address label of each paper. Prompt re* nowals must bo madu at the expiration, other wise the subscription will be discontinued. Entered at the Postofflce at Freeland. as Second-Class Mutter, . Make all money orders, checks. eto.,payablt i lo the LYibune J'nnting Company, Limited. Even philanthropy becomes an ev eryday occuiTcnce. Andrew Carnegie', recent $2,000,000 gift required hut sir lines of newspaper space. It is the man who is not philanthropic thai excites wonder these days. The new Prince of Wales will prob ably not uudertako to eclipse the tradi tions of his title with reference to sport and bonhomie. In his case the parental influence can be exorcised with that intelligence which comes of experience. Millionaires who have exhausted all the ordinary forms of pleasure have adopted others that are new and open to doubt. For example, a copper king has ridden a distance of eighty-one and a half miles in three hours and twenty minutes in an automobile over an ordinary country road, "merely for pleasure." At that rate of speed the most common Irregularities in the road cause the "auto" to sway like a catboat In a choppy sea. There is constant excitement in the fear of running down somebody, and occasionally ah appalling doubt as to whether the dog which has just been howled over and killed was not in fact a child—a ques tion about Which a man in dusty gog gles and going at express speed can not he positive. Then there is the reasonable expectation that the man himself will lie tljjccj byfore the fud of his pleasure ti-qJ. A "conviction has teen had in Minne apolis under the new law making the failure to provide necessities for a wife a felony. The first victim went to the workhouse for ninety day 3, although ho might have been sentenced to hard labor at the penitentiary for three years. This experiment in sociology will be watched with interest. While it is difficult to reform men by law, possibly the fear of punishment as common criminal will deter shiftless men in Minnesota from neglecting or deserting their wives. It is not ex pected that punishments under the law will bo many. That would defeat, to a large oxtcut, the purposes of the law, for a man In the workhouse or the penitentiary Is freed for the time be ing from responsibility for his family, unless his enforced earnings should be converted to their use. Possibly the existence of the law will be enough of a deterrent Faster Than liver Site AVns. There are a number of regular vis itors at the Brooklyn Navy Yard who give a great deal of unsolicited advice to officials there ns to how to run their end of the Navy Department. The pet subject for criticism with these self-coustltutod advisers, Is the use of the cruiser Columbia as a re ceiving ship in place of the old frigate .Vermont "It's a sliarao to use one of the fast est boats in tho navy for such - pur pose," they declare. When this criticism is voiced to Rear- Admiral Barker, the Commandant of the yard, he says quietly and a trifle wearily: "Oh, don't let that worry you; the Columbia is now raster than ever she was." The critic takes a look at tho stout hawsers holding the ship in her berth and slinks away toward the yard gate.—New York Times. Slower Torpedo Boats liefllrcil. Foreign naval powers seem to be demanding much lower speeds from torpedo boats than were specified a few years ago. Numbers, of these lit tle vessels have been built recently which are required to run at only twenty-five and twenty-six knots. l(i I So Thin "l think that's an excellent idea." remarked tho new boarder, as he fin ished h:3 soup. "Ah," said Mrs. Slarv em, "not used to beginning your din ner with soup, eh?" "Soup" ! thought It wis hot avatar to pr.vent dyap psia." —Philadelphia Pres3. Care drives to prayer und prayei jrives away care. THE OLD FERRY. Where the yelUow rapids ran Then in nvonday heat and glare Through the brake of reed and thorn, Came the miller to his meal, Fished tne ancient ferryman Bringing with him all the air In the iiush of early morn. Of the cool old water wheel. And he watched his blue cork quiver And he smoked and talked with Jerry, Till across the misty river As he lay back in the ferry, Came the mellow ferry horn. Tossing at some surface eel. Ran the sturdy farmer boys, And at sunset came a stream Wrestling on the mossy banks. From the meadows and the shore— Skipping stones and making noise, Milkmaids with their pails of cream, Splashing up the footway planks, Bumpkins weary armed and sore, Swapping jests and laughing merry, And they wove green hearts of grasses, While the bent and battered Jerry Pressed them on the blushing lasses, Frowned in dudgeon on their jjranks. As old Jerry bent his oar. —Victor A. Hermann, in the New York Herald. y T err IIEN the first organization \ A J of counties was attempted Y \ in the Northwest a great deal of trouble was pre cipitated between rival laud companies as to the location of the county seats. Each company desired a county seat on its .particular tract of land, but as there were not counties enough to go around this was impossible. Fights and feuds followed and the liveliest promoters of these wore the pioneer editors. In one of the counties that may appropriately bo called C.nyuse the final location of the county seat was on Sand Creek, In the east end of the county, and well removed from two other promising settlements In the county known as Plainville and North Star. The county seat was called Saudhcrg, with that rare love for ugly titles manifest In the Amer ican mind when naming a town, river or mountain peak. In each settlement there was an editor—Boker at Plain ville, Harrison at North Star and Smith at Saudhcrg. The latter, as soon as his community had captured the coun ty seat, manifested his joy by a series of lurid editorials crowing over his rivals and denouncing their opposition to\ Sand berg as villainous. ** The fight, on paper, was a glorious one. It grew so warm that no man - v i 4 (ft 'if/ f£k -JsjjMWW ■'. 'BOKER WAS OUT WITII HIS GUN. from Plainville or North Star dared to visit Saudhcrg. and when the one school teacher of tho latter town chanced to enter Plainville he was immediately seized by the infuriated inhabitants, deprived of his horse und clothes, and compelled to walk forty miles of rich prairie laud, naked, in order to reach homo. Sandlierg swore deep vengeance, hut was content for a long time to confine Its actions to j threats, which the people of the other j towns laughed at. Interested observers of the fight, al- j though, woman-like, regarding it as most foolish, were two young women —one the schoolmistress of Plainville, I and one the schoolmistress of North j Star. Miss Wilson of the former town I was a cousin of Editor Boker, and j Miss Rogers of North Star a cousin of ' Editor Harrison. Miss Wilson regarded j the muss as particularly unfortunate, because shortly after her arrival on j tho frontier, and before the county seat fight, she had met Editor Smith | and conceived a more than passing re gard for him. Smith himself had been much taken with her beauty and intel ligence, and hut for his loyalty to his community would never have gone Into a light which separated him from the woman he loved, but had not told so". Miss Rogers was not as young as Miss Wilson nor so attractive. In fact, she had passed thirty, was sour of temper, ami much disliked by her pu pils. most of whom dreaded her shnrp tougue as much as tuey did the whip site used ou every provocation. Miss Rogers disliked Editor Smith, envied Miss Wilson, hated the frontier and longed for a man with matrimonial inclinations. Editor Boker of Plainville thou.,'it it his duty in the county seat fight to editorially castigate Editor Smith of Sandberg with every issue. He did not suspect his cousin's affection for his enemy, and if he had he would have, at that time, sent her out of the country. On her part, she did not dare to plead with him to forgive and for get. Smith had not yet spoken to her, and while she felt that ho would, if given opportunity, she realized that a prolongation of the war meant a further separation of them and perhaps a permanent end of the sentiments that once had flourished so well. So matters stood until one spring day. In a particularly violent tit of temper. Miss Rogers whipped one of her hoy pupils until the lad foil faint ing at her feet. The news spread but slowly because Editor Harrison did not notice it in his own paper; Editor Boker thought it was none of his trouble, and the public in general heard of it only long after its occur rence. But when Editor Smith learned of it he penned these scorching lines in his editorial columns: "We have no cousin and we cannot fight a woman, but If we had a cross eyed female cousin and she did all that we heard of somebody else's cousin doing—that somebody else being a measly, piratical editor of this county— we would either move her "to a Hotten- tot settlement or send her back East. A word to tho wise is sufficient." The Saudherg paper duly reached riaiuville, and Editor Boker casually glanced over it until he came to the' quoted paragraph. Whatever made him think it referred to his own cousin no one knows to this day. But when lie had read the paragraph in question he quietly thrust the paper into nil inner pocket and then solemnly marched about the town until he had collected the twelve other copies that he know came to Plalnville. Then he returned to his office and sent for his most iutimate l'riend—the cashier of the one private bank. To him he said: "Smith lias gone his full length. He has grossly Insulted my cousin In his paper. He is so hard up ho must attack a woman. She hasn't seen the paper and shall never see it if I can help it, but I'm going to Sandberg in the morning and either Smith or I will be dead by night If I fall, old man, I make any explanation, but spare the girl, and give her all 1 leave." | The cashier's only comment was: j "You ean't do anything else, and as i to-morrow's a dull day I'll just close' i the bank and ride over with you." Then the hands of the two friends met, nnd their eyes said that Smith i must die. The next morning came ; fast enough, and at 0 o'clock Boker, heavily armed as men were in those days and localities, and nctrlde of his favorite yellow horse, rode away from his ofllce with the cashier. They said to the curious that they wore going I out to look over some land. 1 They took the trail which would lead them by the little red schoulhouse whore Miss Wilson I'ad already gath ered her lluck and commenced the daily lessons. Their horses swung off with easy lope, but came to a dead halt when on the trail toward them rode Smith, the man they wanted. lie was astride a hay mare, foam and dust covered, and he raised a hand in friend ly salute, although his gesture was otherwise taken by the two men in front of him. Iloker was out wITi his gun and a tremendous oath and had opened Are in a hurry. The cashier swung to one side and clear of range. Smith shouted at Boker, but getting only a shot in reply whipped out his own gun and replied. .The shots came fast and furious, the two horsemen dashed into each other, Boker went down and Smith too, and they clenched on the prairie sod and beat each other in the effort to kill. After a time there was silence and ! the cashier rode up to find Boker un- I conscious, Smith on top of him and i bleeding badly. From tho sclioolhouse , there came running the teacher, and she fell upon both men and sobbed and moanod and made the cashier think she had gone mad. First she would kiss Smith and then she would kiss Boker, and then sob as If her heart would break. The cashier began to think that something had gone wrong, for sure. At her bidding he rode Into town for help, and after awhile Boker and Smith were In bed and their wounds dressed. Smith was shot through tlie hip and left arm and heat about the head; Boker was wounded three times, had I his I front teeth knocked out aud his left leg broken. Both men were placed in tlie same room in separate beds, but tliey could see each other, even though forbidden to talk. Tho local doctor said they would certainly re cover. Miss Wilson hovered over each, not deigning to notice the wild glare lu her cousin's eyes, nor the deep bewilderment In Spilth's. She knew somebody had blundered, but felt she could afford to wait. As for Plninville, it only regretted at that moment tbat Boker had not killed Smith. It was true to Its editorial hero. Late that night Miss Wilson, sitting with the Injured men, heard Editor Boker hoarsely say to Editor Smith; ".What did you attack my cousin for?" "I didn't." "You did, you lying—" It took all the girl's strength to force Boker down into his bed. Then Intel ligence came to Editor Smith, ne grinned, hurt as- ho was. 'T gave Harrison's cousin a cut," he said, "for beating that child, but not your cousin. I rode all last nlgbt to get here this "morning to ajsk your cousin to- be my wife. She'd accepted me about five minutes beforo I met you. When you saw mo I was coming Into town to make peace with you on the county seat fight I had to shoot you to get a chance to explain. Shake?" "Oh," said Boker, and ills bandaged hand "crossed to Smith's and Miss Wil son laid her own on top of both.— H. I. Cleveland, in the Chicago Bee ord-llerald. Peppery Joko of OJU Indian. Bishop Whipple was especially fond nf telling stories which Illustrated tho calmness and self-control that his In dian friends made it a point of honor to exhibit on all occasions. Some In dian chiefs wero dining, at a Washing ton hotel, and one of tho number, see ing a white man using cayenne pep per, took the bottle and sbbok it gen erously over his plate. After the next mouthful, though ho kept a composed countenance, the flery pepper caused tears to flow down his chocks. His neighbor, noticing this, said; "Why do you weep?" The answer was, "I was thinking of my dead grandmother." The next moment tho second Indian took the pepper-castor and used it, with a like lachrymose result. The first man looked keenly at him and said, "What nro you weeping for?" "I am weeping," was tho answer, "be cause you didn't die when your grand mother did."—Mainly About People. Tho I'rcy of tho Fog Fiend. Tlie Fog Fiend has come to Loudon unusurtily early this year, says the Westminster Gazette, and has been busy painting tho town, not red, hut drab. He cares neither for curses nor anti-smoke committees, and bo plays quaint aud bewildering tricks in the streets. Last night, for Instance, after sickening and half suffocating his vic tims during the day, deepening Ills tones to black as evening came on, he suddenly wiped off the paint in one part of Louden and allowed people to see nnd breathe clearly for an hour, hut only to deepen their disappoint ment with another denso gloom. The effect of tills trick was very singular; the fog suddenly rolled up like a cur tain, and for a short time, so a credi table correspondent tells us, stars were actually visible. There are no words equal to the present, occasion, so we must perforce bo patient A Teat ITor Idiocy, All men ore insane, hut some have the cleverness to conceal It Of late many of our well-known citizens have ' bean lu public or private asylums. Oc casionally ouo is released cured, but there Is the deepest, siiouinlst mys tery about It all. ItecentlV a visitor In 1 an Idiot asylum not faJ from New York asked au attendant low tho tuan -1 agement knew when an! Inmate was i sutlicieiuly restored to sanity to he dls ! charged. "That Is easy enough," was - the reply. "Wo take thfem all Into a . yard where there are several troughs, turn on the taps and giVe them buck ets to bail oat the water and empty ! ' the troughs. Many of 'i-m keeps ball • lug away while the taps keeps run ■ ' lilng, but them us isn't Idiots, stops the ■ j taps. '—New York I'ress. ~ : AFFAIRS ART IN THE HOUSE. Hints l*"or Beauty-Loving tVouien Who Are Thrifty. Make your home express yourself. Because your neighbors have lace cur tains at every window, cellar included, do not follow suit. Tender (leaf) green half curtains of silk are far more dis tinctive, as well as artistic, for some windows. Only foolish women discard a fine piece of furniture because its style is not of the newest. Walnut, so long relegated to the least-used portions of the house, is to bo more fashionable than ever before. * * The most gorgeous sideiroards (and chairs) can be made of shabby oak ones if well shaped and massive, by applying one coat of dull black stain. No rubbing down Is needed over var nish, us well as not the stain acts beautifully, and the result is "Flemish ouk"—a perfect imitation, indeed. Stained floors grow upon one. Even conservative housekeepers are begin ning to grant the beauty of smooth, glossy floors aud rugs, and the labor Is not one-half as great as some sup pose, not one whit harder Hum sweep ing carpets. To sell a massive parlor suite be cause Its covering and springs were done for Is to show great lack of thrift. Take the advice of one who knows, tnd have your old suite done up in I rich green corduroy—not any fringe about it, but finished in box pleating of the goods nailed in place by brass nails after tlie French style. Cheap parlor suites are both snares and de lusions. —Philadelphia Boeord. How to Fill Pillows With Feathers. Every woman who lias ever tried to fill new ticking eases with leathers knows the full difficulty of the task set the princess in the fairy tale, wiio was ordered to put one bagful of feathers into another without letting n siugle one escape. They fly hither and yon, stick to clothing and carpets, and almcst drive the neat housewife to despair. But housekeepers in tiie good old days had away of dealing with them which Is well worth passing on to their children's children. The new ticking cases were sewed firmly all around, except for a space of ten Inches at the middle of one of the narrow ends. The case from which the feathers were to ho removed was thou ripped open for the same distance in tiie middle of onj of the -kort ends, and tiie sides of the sift thus formed were stitched to tho sides of the opening In the new case. This of courso united tho two cases closely, leaving an open ing between, through which the feath ers enu easily ho pushed by ueftiy "kneading" the outside of the case containing thorn. When tlm latter is empty rip the cases apart, collect the few that may still ho clinging to tho sides or in the corners of the old one, put them into the new pillow, sew up the ten-inch silt, and the troublesome task will have beeu accomplished with very little labor.—Tho Ladles' World. RougltFinlsited Wall*. The desire for special soi't tints, that can so much easier be obtained in I:ul somino, has led to quite a fad for very rough finished plaster walls, kalso mined in preference to paper or fabric coverings. Green Pepper Omelet—Wash, remove seeds from two green peppers, cut lu thlu slices, and cook tender in a table spoonful of butter. Make a plain om elet; when ready to serve, place tlie peppers ou it, fold over, and dish on a hot platter. Apple Charlotte—Wash, pare and quarter eight medium-sized tart ap ples then stew slowly In a thiu syrup until tender, but not mashed. Season with nutmeg. Line tho bottom aud sides •of a buttered rumequln witl stale sponge cake, fill the apples, cover with thin slices of the cake, sprinkle freely with hits of butter, and bake. Serve cold with whipped cream. Parsnip Fritters—Wash aud scrape them and cut In slices, cover them with boiling water, cook until tender, mash them through a colander, re turn them to the fire, add to two large parsnips a tablespoonful of butter, salt aud pepper to taste, aud one egg beaten well. Mix thoroughly, remove from the fire, aud when cool make Into small flat cakes and fry in a little batter. Serve hot. Pumpkin Preserves—Pare aud cut up one large yellow pumpkin; weigh the pumpkin cubes and to each pound add one pound of sugar; squeeze the juiee of one dozen lemons Into a bowl nud add one gill of it to each pound of pumpkin. Mix the sugar and pump kin, pour over the lemon Juice and let it stand twelve hours; then put it iuto the preserving kettle and boil gently until the pumpkin becomes clear and crisp. When It Is tender, take out the pumpkin, place In jars, strain the sirup and pour it over the preserves, ileal. Serve cold with tlie cottage cheese and a little cream. These preserves are nice with hot bread of any kind and with birJrwheat griddle cakes. ANOTHER ABDUCTION. Help! Help! A prisoner am I! My fate to marry, or to die! My captor is a znigli'ty maid, Adept in crafty ambuscade. Flic holds me girt with cunr.injr wiles— With glances, blushes, pouts and snn.es. Whene'er I strive escape, alacli! My circling footsteps bring me back. Alas! No ransom can be sent— The wealth of all the Orient Could purchase not, I know, for me A single hour of liberty. A million steeds, a million men. Can take me not from her again. For, aye ,she has me prisoner— I die unless I marry her! —Edwin L. Sabin, in I'uck. f L/* — : "Has a swell trade, ch?" "Swell? Say, he's just now collecting for goods he sold three years ago!' I —Detroit Free Press. Binks—"l hear that Mr. Grentman will never run for another office." Jinks—"Goodness me! When did he die?"— New York Weekly. He—"They say Colonel Dover is quite a soldier. In how many engagements did he take part?" She—"Six before his wife got him."—Princeton Tiger. Although in an unselfish tone Men preach the golden rule anew, Each always tries to keep his own And get the other fellow's, too. —Wa :hington Star. "Chappie is making money at last." "In what way? I didn't know he could do anything." "He can't, hut he has rented the back of his collar out for a signboard."—Chicago Post. The Pretty Girl—"Miss Antique was named after her uncle George, wasn't she?" The Spiteful Girl—"l don't know; she looks as if she had been named before him."—Tit-Bits. "Poll! My papa wears evenin* clothes every time he goes to parties." "That ain't anythin'. Our minister wears his night clothes every time he preaches."—Cleveland Plain Dealer. Pie climbed the pinnacle of lame. The height of uis career; And sadly then did he exclaim: "It's niightly lonely here!" —Philadelphia ileeord. Miss De Puyster—"Do you really think It is possible for us to love our enemies?" The Bishop—"Well, I think we could love some people more as enemies than we could as friends." —Puck. Speaking of artists, it takes a rich man to draw a cheek, a pretty girl to draw attention, a horse to draw a cart, a porous plaster to draw the skiu, nud n free lunch to draw a crowd.— Harlem Life. The breakfast didn't suit him. "What a pity It is," he said, "that love's young dream never can live to grow up." "Why can't it?" she asked. "It's killed off by acute dyspepsia," he answered.—Chicago Post. lie—"l must confess to a grent deal of egotism.' She—"lndeed?" He— "Yes; I think about myself a great deal too much." She—"Uh, that isn't egotism! That's merely the human tendency to worry over trifles."—Glas gow Times. "Death, you know," explained the doctor consolingly, "is like a thirty day note. When It fails due why that's the end of it." "But, doctor, protested the business man faintly, "I am paying you to get me an extension of time, and I expect you to do it."- Chieago Post. Little Joanneatte's mother found her one day with her face covered with jam from ear to ear. "Oh, Jeanuette," said her mother, "what would ycu think if you caught mo looking like that some day?" "I should think you'd had a awful good time, mamma," said Jeanuette, her face brightening.—Tit- Bits. Hortense—"Tom Alley says he loves me better than auybody else in the world, and he says beside that he never loved anybody else in all his life." Flora—"And Charley Bliss tells me he has been hi love with hun dreds of girls, but he loves me better than he ever did any of them."—Bos ton Transcript. Electioneering by i'lionogrtiph. A candidate tor municipal honors in Sheffield has lately been putting bis views before the electors by m ans of a phonograph, and it is possible that the plan may soon be extensively adopted. At a recent parliamentary election In Victoria one ol' the candi dates shirked the task of personally airing his views by sending a phono graph around the various townships in charge ol' a man on horseback. The electors, however, resented the appli cation of this time-saving method, and left the owner of the machine at the bottom of the poll. The main differ ence seems to lie iu the fact that, while the phonograph will render a speech plainly enough, it cannot be heckled or got to reply to questions.—London Chronicle. Tho AbKUHaiii'g Day. Almost everywhere within the range of Christendom Friday is a day of pro verbial ill-luck. The following list of assassinations tends to confirm this superstition: William of Orange, July 10, 1554- a Friday; Henry HI. of France, Au gust 1. 1588—a Friday; Henry IV. of France, May 14, 1010—a Friday; Gus tavus 111. of Sweden, March 10, 1798 -a Friday; Lincoln of United Stntes, tpril 14, 1805—a Friday; MeKinley of luited States, September tt. 1001—a Friday.—Llpptueott'a Magazine,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers