Freeland Tribune
Established 1888. •
PUBLISHED EVERY
MONDAY AND THURSDAY.
BY THE
TRIBUNE PRINTING COMPANY, Limited
Ofriv-E: MAIS Street Above Centre.
FREELAND, PA.
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The Ohio legislature has actually
passed a law to protect skuuks, as if
the little animals were powerless to
protect themselves.
The Victoria Cross, the possession
of which every British soldier covets,
is said to be the oulv reward of merit
which British law forbids the owuar
from pawning.
Evidently there is a mistake in the
popular civic soubriquet of Philadel
phia. The census just concluded
shows that out of 283,871 families
questioned ouly 1925 claimed to bo
Quakers.
The Samoaus are rapidly becomiug
up to date. A dispatch states that iu
a recent cricket match at Savaii the
competing teuins aud their respective
admirers took offence at a decision of
oue of the umpires and indulged in a
free for all light, which resulted iu
teu men being killed and the field
being covered with wounded. Just
how the umpire fared the dispatch
does uot state, but had the incident
occurred ou a ball field here his uaino
would undoubtedly heal the list of
casualties.
At an English police court recently
Captain Herve H. A. Errington Josse
of Normau Villa, Burgate, Grimsby,
was summoned by the iulaud revenue
for keeping a carriage without a li
cense. The question raised was whether
a vehicle consisting of a car attached
to a motor cycle was one carriage or
two. If it was considered as oue, the
maximum traveling speed allowed
would be twelve miles, a id if as two,
six miles per hour. The magistrate ,
decided that it was one vehicle, and im
posed a tine of oue guinea.
There are few bits of news more j
satisfactory than that t'.io island of |
Dry TortugH, with its mi j-ity foe- j
tress,has been trans e red to t'n • navy, I
and aud will heuce 'o. th serve as a!
fortiiied naval base aud coaling sta
tion, remarks the New York Tribune. !
It is the first such ta i>n ever pos- '
sessed by tlie United States, an lit is
just where such a one is m>s needed, j
It will be a veritable " ii > altar of the '
Gulf" for the protection of our south- !
ern coast, the guardianship of our I
Caribbean posse is'ous and sjntinel
ship over the c :nt-uu appro.icb.es to
the canal that is :< 10. We salute the
flag uj on Fort Jo Vcr-on ! I.on_, may
it wove I
The d alers iu automobiles *eo:n to
have overli oked a use'ul \ ohr iu no
advertising more copiously the :q ecial
adaptability of their ma bines for
Sunday use. The great objection of
the more scrupulous Sabbath-keepers
to permitting folks to take their car
riages out on Sunday has l ean that it
makes too much work for s rvants and
horses. This is a fairly sound objec
tion, for the desire to make Sunday;
a-i far as possible, a day of rest for all
bauds has a great deal to recommend
it. But an automobile, especially the
sort that the owner himself guides,
need make hardly any Sunday work
in the stable, states E. S. Martin, iu
Harper's Weekly. At a pinch it can
even stand unwashed until Monday
morning. Neither coachman nor
groom is needed to take it out, or even
wait at homo until it comes back. It
is the ideal Sunday vehicle, beating
even the bicycle, since its use is neither
so laborious as to impair due Sunday
rest nor incompatible with Sunday
clothes.
Lonß-IIrtlr(l ami Shcirl-llnlrod.
The following story is told by Dr.
Pentecost. The Incident is said to
have taken place in the Boston taber
nacle. An usher came in and said:
"There a man without who wishes to
see you." "Well," said Moody, "1
have no time to see him now." "But,"
replied the usher, "he says he must
see you on important business." "Whai
kind of a man Is he?" "Oh, he is a tall,
thin man, with long hair." "That set
tles It," said Moody; "I don't want to
see any long haired meu or short
haired women-'
William Green, ot Harrison county,
got two years in the penitentiary for
stoning a passenger trai".
A FOfcL THERE WAS*
BY A. J. WATER HO USB.
A Fool there was in the good old day,
The Fool of a King, and a merry wight.
He cracked his jokes in tlio rare old way,
The way that doth ever the world de
light;
He joked about the mother-in-law,
And the plumber man was his funny prey.
And the iceman jest brought a loud guffaw
From the other fools, as it doea to-day.
For the suns may rise and the suns may set
And the slow years still the centuries
span,
But there hasn't been noticed—that is, as
yet—
A change in the jokes of the fuuny man.
Now the Fool one day was exceedingly
quaint;
His old-maid joke was a rare success,
Aud his cap und bells and his touches of
paint
Were the soul of humor, as you might
guess.
And the courtiers roared when the good
King smiled,
They roared in laughter, as courtiers can,
Aud they almost died in a transport wild
When the monarch said, "What a funny
man!"
For the years may come and the years may
go.
But the world and Its people are ever the
same;
If a ruler sighs they are lost in woe;
If he smiles the echoes their mirth pro
claim.
But e'en while his humor bubbled and
flowed,
BY HENRY RIDEfIU.
SHARP evening
it was, tlie street
i. ft JWV l am l )S were strug-
UIIWW Rliug faintly
Wit tliroll ??k a haze of
yellow fog—the
dead ail au th us
blossoms rattled
-fH overlleacl as the
tree i ll front of
Mrs. Medlaw's
re d brick house
Dloasoruetl 1 nil
°* little rattle-
Aud Mrs. Mediaw had just sat dowu
to her evening refection of toast aud
tea, when Polly, the little maid who
always wore green checked gingham
aud carpet slippers, came shuffling iu.
"Please, ma'am there's two youug
ladies dowu iu the parlor as says
you're their aunt."
"Oh, bother!" said Mrs. Medlaw in
i sort of soliloquy. "It's Eda and
Ella! I knew that they'd come ou me
when the old mau died! As if I
hadn't auything else to do but to
support a swarm of lazy relations.
Why didn't you say I wasn't at home,
Polly?"
"I would, ma'am, if I'd supposed
they was any relation of your'n,
afore I'd let 'em in," said unconscious
Polly. ''But they was dressed so
nice and looked so clipper I thought,
of course, they was real ladies."
"Aud just as the tea was boiling,
too!" said Mrs. Medlaw. "Oh, dear
me, what a world this is!"
Eda and Ella Carr were sitting,
pale, black-robed, in the moldy
smelling little parlor, when their aunt
came in. They were pretty girls,
with delicate wax-white complexions,
hair so dark that it gave you the im
pression of being black, and great,
blue-gray eyes. They were so ex
actly alike that strangers could
scarcely tell them apart; in fact, as
Is often the case with twins, then-
Voices were pitched in the same key,
and you could scarcely decide at first
which was speaking.
"Well, girls," said Mrs. Medlaw,
father ungraciously, "so you've come
here?"
"We had nowhere else to go, aunt,"
said Eda, meekly.
"Humph!" greeted the old lady.
"Take off your things. I suppose
you calculate to stay all night?"
Ella and Eda looked forlornly at
each other. Was this the welcome
they had anticipated from their only
surviving relation?
Mrs. Medlaw lost no time after the
scanty meal in opening the subject of
ways and means."
j "Well," said Mrs. Medlaw, "and
what are you going to do now?"
"We don't know, aunt," said Ella,
1 trying hard not to cry.
I "We haven't quite made up our
minds, aunt," said Eda, helplessly,
j "Well, ain't it high time you had?"
said Mrs. Medlaw. "Folks can't live
lon air! And two great, grown-up girls
I like you ought to be doing something
| to earn their salt!"
| Ella winced, but her more courage
ous sister responded, promptly:
"That's just exactly what we want
i to do, Aunt Medlaw."
j "If we only knew want," said Ella.
| "There's always plenty of work for
willing hands," said Mrs. Medlaw.
1 "Perhaps you could suggest some
thing," said Ella timidly.
"Polly's goiug away and I want a
girl to do my housework at 88 a
month," said Mrs. Medlaw.
Ella hesitated, but Eda shook her
head.
"We are scarcely strong enough for
that, Aunt Medlaw," she said.
"Humph! I don't see as you look
any way delicate," said Mrs. Medlaw,
incredulously. "And Mrs. Hall, that
keeps the boarding house next door,
needs a waitress at 89 "
"Quite out of the question," said
resolute Ella.
"You're hard to please," sneered the
old lady. "P'rhaps you suppose I'm
going to pay you a salary for sitting
here and working worsteds."
Ella rose to her feet
Till it seemed that in life he couldn't be
grave.
The King caught a glimmer, and to him he
strode:
"A tear iu vour eye! What means It, you
knave?"
Oh, low sank the head of the Fool on his
breast.
"Your pardon, my master," 'was this that
he said,
"Mine eyes do but water the plant of my
jest-
In the cot over youder my babe Ueth
dead."
For the carpet of living we knit, wo knit;
Warp of losses and woof of gain;
And there's never a luugh that is born of
wit
But through It there soundeth the note
pulu.
A Fool there was, as I said before.
And fools there are to the present day;
Aud some of them wear their bells, "but
more
Dress as oven philosophers may.
But whether we pose as that or this
Is little of moment, is little for care,
For under the mask that we wear is this:
The ghost of the hope that Is dead out
there.
For we strut and stride till the curtain
falls,
And we laugh no less though the heart be
sore.
So we hide from others what haunts, ap
pals:
Tne ghost of the blessing that comes no
more.
—San Francisco Examiner.
"Aunt Medlaw," said she, "we came
here for aid aud advice—not to be in
sulted."
"Humph!" snarled the matron.
"What do you expect to do about it.
Sit dowu again, Ella Carr. "Don't
get mad for nothing. There's another
chance I got for you."
"What is that?"
"I've had to forclose a mortgage on
a little fancy store. I waut to put
some oue iu it to sell out the stock.
I'll give you a fair coinuiissiou ou
w.iafc you sell. Come, what do you
s. v to that?"
"I'm willing to try," said Ella.
"Heaven knows I am anxious enough
to earu my own living."
"And I, too," said Eda. "We
know nothing about such a busi
ness "
"But you can learu, I suppose,
said Auut Medlaw.
"But we can learu," said Eda,
hopefully.
And in less than a week the little
thread and needle store around the
corner, which had presented a grim
and shuttered front for some days,
was reopened, and two pretty girls,
dressed iu black, were posted behiud
the counter.
Mrs. Mopson seut her two little
boys to match a skeiu of green worsted,
and enquire for peppermint taffy first.
The widow Hope purchased a little
hosiery aud three cheap pocket hand
kerchiefs. A small girl caiue to ask
the time of day and au old mau
bought a pair of suspenders, all with
in an hour—aud Eda aud Ella began
to think they might, in time, de
velop into commercial characters of
note.
To be sure, business waxed rather
dull toward the end of the day, but
just at dusk a tall, nice-looking youug
mau came iu to buy a card of pearl
shirt buttons. Ella took dowu a box,
and they were quite a long time in
selectiug the prettiest pattern aud
most appropriate size.
"I forgot oue thing," said the
young man, after he had contracted
for an elghteen-cent investment. "I
must have them sewed ou. Could
you do it?"
"I'll try," said Ella, laughing, "if
you'll bring the shirts around."
So the young man brought his
shirts, and sat dowu to wait, while
Ella's needle flew deftly in aud out.
He was in a hurry, he told her—be
was foreman iu the printing office of
a great daily paper, aud worked at
nights, when the rest of the world
was asleep, like a bat or an owl.
In tho meantime Ella was tryiug to
suit au old lady in green spectacles,
who wauted some ribbon, whose color
she didn't exactly know, whose width
she wasn't certain about, and whose
quality she had not yet made up her
mind concerning. But Ella's patieuce,
tact and good temper were inexhaus
tible. At last the old lady was suited,
and went away rejoicing, leaning on
the arm of her nephew, who had
manifested extraordinary interest iu
the shade of the drab ribbon.
"That's a nice girl, Oswald," said
she. "Do you know, 1 almost think
she might suit me as a companion.
She seems so very good-humored! I
wonder if it would do to ask her if she
would like such a situation."
"I don't see why uot," said Oswald
Grey, thiukiug he had never seen
softer gray eyes or prettier hair.
"Shall we go back?"
"To morrow will bo time enough,"
said Mrs. Martiguy.
On the morrow she came back.
"Didn't the ribbon suit?" asked
Ella.
"Oh, yes," said Mrs. Martiguy;
"the ribbon was all right. But there's
something else I want."
"What is that?" asked Ella inno
cently.
"A compauion to read to me, take
care of my canaries and play drowsy
old tunes ou the piano when I feel
sleepy. I give five hundred a year,
Saturday afternoons and board! Will
yon come?"
Ela looked at her sister. Five hun
dred a year seemed a gieat sum for a
girl who uever yet had earned five foi
herself.
"Yes, go, Eda," said Ella. "I can
manage the store by myself easily
enough. Aud," in a whisper, "I've
taken a contract to make a half dozen
new shirts for Mr. Lessuer, we to find
material."
"Who is Mr. Lessner?"
"Oh, the printer. I can do it at
odd minutes, when there is no oue in
the store!"
At the end of the month Eda came
to report to her sister.
"Well, Eda, how do you like it?"
said Ella.
"Oh, so much! Mrs. Martiguy is
queer, but she is so kind. And—and
—Oswald Grey, her nephew, is very
polite."
"Is he?"
"Yes," said Eda, fingering at a box
of hooks aud eyes. "I like him ever
so much, aud he likes me. To tell
the truth, Ella "
"I see," said Ella, putting her arms
around her sister, "he wants you to
be his companion. For life, eh, Eda?"
"How do you kuow?" faltered
dimpled Eda.
"Oh, I'm not quite a fool," said
Ella. "But now I've go! something
to tell you. I finished Mr. Lessuer's
shirts, and they fitted him perfectly.
He says I'm the only woman he ever
knew who fitted him with shirts on
the first trial. He has saved up a lit
tle property and he wants to invest it
somewhere, and Aunt Medlaw wants
to sell out this store. So he's going
to buy it aud I'm going to koep it on
condition that I marry him."
"Oh, Ella!"
"Not such a very hard condition,
either," said Ella. "Because he's
very handsome, and very pleasaut,
aud I like him very much; iu fact, I
believe I'm iu love with him. There!
now it's all out. And Ido believe,
Eda, we're the two happiest girls iu
the world, and all through Auut Med
law's thread and needle store."
"Well, well," grumbled Mrs. Med
law, "so the girls have cone, and I'm
all by myself agaiu. It is rather lone
some. They were uice girls—but the
young men found it out as well as ire.
Young men always do find such things
out."
MOUNTAIN-GUN AMMUNITION.
New Shells For Use In the Guns Pur
chased For Philippine Service.
A new type of shell has recently been
designed for use in mountain-guns of
the United States of the variety lately
purchased abroad for service in the
Philippines. It greatly increases the
powers of the gun. The name applied
to it is "double common shell." It
has a weight of twenty pounds. The
staudard shell for the mountain-gun
has a weight of twelve and a half
pounds. The peculiarity of the new
shell is a chemical mixture carried in
the explosive chamber, which breaks
up, at the instant of the shell's burst
ing, iuto incendiary stars. These
stars will set ou fire anything in the
shape of woodwork, and they are
particularly effective in setting on
lire sheds aud outhouses. For night
service a shrapuel shell has beeu de
signed for the mouutaiu-guu which is
Hlled with illuminating stars. The
effect of a burst is to light up a very
large area of grouud with such an in
tense glare as to make it possible
readily to locute au enemy.
The mountaiu-guus seut out to the
Philippines were secured in England.
They are of a new variety, so new, in
fact, that the United States secured
several gnus ahead of the British
Government. Recently the British
authorities have been rushiug out to
South Africa, as fast as turned out,
gnus of the same variety. Gue of
these mountaiu-guns and its carriage
weigh collectively 873 pounds. Using
a twelve-aud-oue-half-pouud shell, the
muzzle velocity, under service coudi
tious, is 920 foot seconds. In very
rough country it is possible to trans
port gun aud carriage ou the backs of
four mules, aud for the purpose of
transportation iu such mauuer the
weights have beeu divided as follows;
Guu, 23G pounds; cradle, shafts,
crossbar, etc., 220 pounds; trail aud
elevating gear, 218 pounds; wheels
and axles, 1881 pounds. In the trans
portation of ammunition twelve rounds
iu four metallic boxes is allowed to
each mule, the ammuuitiou weighing
172 pounds, and the metallic boxes
thirty-uiue pounds, making2ll pounds
for the load.
The rauge of the mountaiu-guu is
4300 yards. Its length is a trifle over
thirty-eight iuches. In firing trials
with the guu a rate of rapidity of fif
teen shots per minute has beeu
recorded. It is noteworthy tbat the
mountaiu-guu is the ouly iield-gun
possessed by the United States at
present which may properly be classed
as a rapid-tire weapon. The mountain
piece is provided with a uou-recoil
carriage, something which the field
guns of the United States do uot pos
sess. As a comparisou, Frauoe,
which is reckoned to possess the best
field-guns to-day, has no less thau
2770 light artillery pieces of the rapid
fire type, and each guu capable of
firing, if necessary, between fifteen
aud twenty shots per minute.
Mnile MlMake In the Tree*.
Some time ago the city of Richmond,
Ind., had to pay S2OOO for destroying
a large shade tree. A dangerous tree
had been menacing the life aud limb
of pedestriaus ou a sidewalk and the
city council instructed the chief of
police to notify the owner of the tree
that it must be cut down "iustanter."
The sergeant of police served the no
tice on the wrong property owner,who
was induced, under protest, to cut
down two of the fiue3t shade trees in
j the city. This mistake has been dis
| covered and the owner wants sub
' stantial damages. If the city has to
! pay S4OOO for the two trees the bonds
j men of the police sergeant will be
; asked to contribute.—lndianapolis
| Press.
jJ .EVER MORMON ELDERS
THEIR SUCCESS IN MAKINC SERVANT
CIRL CONVERTS.
Evidence Tlmt Many Domestic* From
I'rotestnut Kurope Hare linruuie l'roi-
elytes—Scarcity of Servant* Attributed
to This Cause—Skill of the M iuntune*
~I ~Y OR the past three years the
!=/ large cities of the East have
I been the scene of the labor of
CT Mormon elders, who have
sought, converts to Mormoniam in
kitchens aud at basement entrances.
Great numbers of pamphlets have been
distributed by these elders among the
women who are included in the army
of domestic help. A careful investi
gation has been made among the
agencies, aud particularly among those
which act for women that come to this
country from Protestant Europe. The
result seems clearly to establish the
fact long known to many housekeep
ers, that many Swedish, Norwegian,
Danish, German and English women
have deserted housework and gone to
Utah. The exact number of pros
elytes canuot be given, of course, but
those who have been in a position to
study the matter, declare that a very
large proportion of the unmarried
Protestaut female domestic servants
have been converted to Mormouism
aud taken out West.
Recently such an exodus of this
kiud occurred in Chicago that the
newspapers of that city declared that
there was a fainiue of house servants
aud no relief could be obtained. Vari
ous reasons were assigned and some
of them were plausible enough, but
what is believed to be the real one
was not mentioned. The elders of
the Mormon Church might have ex
plained the matter, for scores of
young women went out to Utah from
Chicago at one time. The conversion
of these servants has gone on quietly
aud been managed with skill. In
fact, no generals of modern times
have carried on campaigns in the held
with greater ability, tact aud energy
than have these eiders who have gath
ered their recruits from the kitcheus
of the land, and left the country with
them secretly and silently.
Occasionally a mistress has come
upon a pamphlet relating to religious
matters, generally printed on poor
paper, in poorer type and rarely clean
or attractive, in make-up. The major
ity of these pamphlets have had such
titles as "A Friendly Discussion upon
Religious Subjects," the seeming
harmlessness of which has not tempt
ed investigation—sometimes tracts
eutitied "A Voice of Warning and In
struction to all People," has been
seen in the hands of servants, but be
yond an occasional discovery of this
kiud, people generally have been in
utter iguorauce of the work being
done in the cities among servant girls
by agents of the Mormon Church. One
observing womau v/ho successively
hired three Swedes, and received
from all the same explanation, that
they were about to be married, was
amazed to notice that the same man
proved to be the admirer of two of her
cooks. The fact dawned upon her
when he was seen in conversation
with the third servant. He passed an
a brother to the third, bnt succeeded
in inducing her to give up her place.
Unconscious, aud concerned ruore for
the comfort of her family thau the
welfare of the help she "engaged, she
did not investigate the reasons given
her for their leaving, nor did she seek
to dissuade a girl from marrying if
this reason was made the pretext for
departure.
One clever woman who happened to
bo in thq basement of her house alone
one afternoon answered a summons to
the street door and there saw a young
man whose appearance was that of a
countryman, aud whose mauner
showed a restraint born of inex
perience in his business. The wom
an's kitchen apron led him to con
clude that he was talking with the
cook, and he whisperiugly asked her
if she would read a little book he
would lend her, and let him come aud
talk with her about it sometime?
Thereupon he hauded to her a volume
of 200 pages, pocket size, aud bound
in vivid red cloth. It looked harmless
enough, as did the begrimed pamphlet
ho also gave her. The man eagerly
iuquired when he might call, and was
told to come back one week later. Ho
did so, aud was met before reaching
the basement bell by a member of the
household who warued him to leave
and return 110 more. Eveu after an
examination of the book, which proved
to be one ou the faith and doctriue of
the Church of the Latter Day Saiuts,
she did not realize that her caller was
a Mormon older, nor did she suspect
that oue of his deuomiuatiou might
have converted her last cook, who
was a young and strong woman, not
long from Sweden.
Another housekeeper discovered in
the mail box a circular advising the
reader to send to a certain address
for books, tracts and sermous, aud
asking the reader to get the book of
Mormou, which could be had for a
nominal sum, at au address giveu.
Haudiug the circular to her servant
see noticed that the latter recognized
the subject aud hastily put it not iuto
the fire but into the coal box. Sub
sequently this same woman found an
other printed document in her kitchen,
giving a glowiug description of the
Salt Lake Temple, aud of Salt Lake
City. A poor illustration of the temple
adorned the circular.
Countless complaints have been
made by housekeepers of the presence
iu their kitcheus of "followers," aud
endless have been the discussions as
how best to get rid of them without
losing their servants. Aud, wheu
notes have beeu compared by neigh
bors, it has beeu found that many
servants have left their places ou pre
texts that wero so trivial as to bear
the stamp of untruthfulness, aud that
offers of increased wages did uot avail
to keep them.
The problem of domestic help, cUf*
ficult enough in the past to all but the
very rich, has become doubly so since
this new factor has been introduced
into it. Agaiust the influence of the
preaching of the elders and their
bright pictures of au independent
home for their converts in the West,
where good, honest farmers are de
clared to be in waiting for wives to
come to them, nothing avails. The
newcomer among servants is, perhaps,
easiest won over to the Mormon faith,
but all grades have represf ives
among the converts. Aud, in justice
to the proselytizers, it may be said
that they try to convert old and young
alike, although they do not encourage
others than the young, aud to some
extent the middle aged, to go to the
West.
Those whoso attentions have been
called to the activity of the elders
among the servant girls and who have
investigated the matter And that while
their success is more marked among
servant girls thau any other class of
working women they do not confine
themselves to this one class. They
frequent the small stores where young
women are employed and seek to know
women who earn their own livings,
particularly the poorer paid wage
earners. Their quiet persistency, aud
unvaryingly patient attitude toward
women, are aids to their success, and
they proselytize continuously. Some
of the elders have had the courage to
baud their pamphlets to women in the
streets, carefully selecting the women
they accost.
The demuad for house servants is
universal, and all over the country
complaints are heard of the dearth
that exists. The Mormon elders have
worked so successfully that, it is as
serted, they are to be credited with
the changed conditions in domestic
service; and they have worked so
shrewdly that their proselytiziug was
not noticed until it had made great
headway.
From England come fewer domes
tics every seasou, and the work of the
Mormons in England is said to be the
cause. Many English converts to the
Mormon Church pass through New
York OQ their way to (Jtah, out it is
becoming more difficult every day to
hire English servants.—New York
Sun.
TITO Velvet Babies.
An almost forgotten book, save
among scholars, is "Lays of the Deer
Forest," by two brothers, Johu So
bieski aud Charles Edward Stuart. It
was written by men who lived all the
year round among the wild animals of
the Highlands, aud learned to love
them as only the familiar can. One
of the most beautiful descriptions of
these abundant nature-notes is that ol
a doe, which was seen for several
mornings, "restless and anxious, list
ening aud searchiugthe wind, trotting
up aud down, picking a leaf here and
a leaf there." After her short aud
unsettled meal, she would take a frisk
round, leap into the air, dart into her
secret bower, aud appear no more un
til the twilight.
One day I stole down the brae among
the birches. In the middle of the
thicket there was a group of young
trees growing out of a carpet of moss
which yielded like a down pillow.
The prints of the doe's slender, forked
feet were thickly traced about the hol
low, aud in the centre there was a vel
vety bed, which seemed a little higher
than the rest, but so natural that it
would not have been noticed by any
unaccustomed eye.
I carefully lifted the green cushion,
and under its veil, rolled close to
gether, the head of each resting on
the Hauk of the other, nestled two
beautiful little kids, their large velvet
ears laid smooth ou their dappled
necks, their spotted sides sleek and
shining as satin, aud their little deli
cate legs, as slender as hazel \vand.s,
shod with tiny shoes as smooth and us
black as ebony, while their large dark
eyes looked at me with a full, mild,
quiet gaze, which ha 1 not yet learned
to fear the hand of man
Still they had a uameless doubt
which followed every motiou of miue.
Their little limbs shrank from my
touch, and their velvet fur rose and
fell quickly; hut as I was about to re
place the moss, ouo turned its head,
lifted its sleek ears toward me, and
licked my hand as I laid their soft
niautle over them.
I often saw them afterward, when
they grew strong aud came abroad
upon the brne, and frequently I called
oft' old Dreaduaught when he crossed
their warm track.
Tolatol's Sense of Honor,
The family of Count Tolstoi has a
large circle of acquaintances, anil
hardly au evening passes but there are
guests. At one music party a lady's
singing displeased Couut Tolstoi's
boys aud they adjourned to auother
room aud made a uoise. Their father
lost patience aud went after them, aud
a characteristic admonition ensued:
"Are yon making a uoise on pur
pose?" lie asked.
After some hesitation came au an
swer in the affirmative: "Y-y-yea."
"Does not her singing please you?"
"Well, no. Why does she howl?"
declared one of the boys, with vexa
tion.
"So you wish to protest agaiust her
singing?" asked Tolstoi iu a serious
tone.
"Yes."
"Then go out and say so, or staud
in the middle of the room aud tell
every oue present. That would be
rude, but upright and honest. But
you have got together aud are squeal
ing like grasshoppers iu a corner. I
will not eudure such protests." New
castle (Eng.) Chronicle.
Treasure, of the I>eep.
It is computed that there is 84,000,-
000,000 worth of gold aud jewels at
the bottom of the sea on the route be
tween Eugland aud India.
| OUR BUDGET OF 11UH0R.
,
LAUCHTER-PRO VOICING STORIES FOR
LOVERS OF FUN.
A Sorry Joke Supwratltlon* Collide—
Fault on Both Side* Magic of a
Name—Still More BeiiiarkaUie— Wliea
Polite neat* Doean't l'ay, -Lie., Etc.
Tlie automobile tired out
And couldn't go at all,
So they got au equine, big and stout,
Its helpless hulk to haul.
The automobile hung Its head.
Its helpless plight to see.
And to Its shame-faced >-olf it said,
"This is u horse on me."
—Elliott's Maganiao.
Superstition* Collide.
"A horseshoe, you see, got wedged
in the switch."
"Did it derail your car?"
"Not much. My car was 13
| Indianapolis Journal.
FKUH on Both Side*.
She—"You don't kiss me like yoa
I did before we were married."
I He—"No? Aud before we were
I married you never tried to kiss uie
when you had a mouthful of pins."
I Magic of h Nit me.
"What's that ugly, yellowish-brown
I thing you have ou, Dorothy?"
"Ugly?" This is my new kuaki
I coat."
j "It is? Oh, how lovely!" Chicago
Record.
Still More Keniarkiibte.
i "He's au old fossil, that's what ho
is," remarked Miss Kittish, referring
I to Mr. Willoughby.
j "But would it not bo more worthy
: of remark if he were a youug fossil?"
asked Miss Frocks.—Judge.
When l'olltPllPM* Doesn't l' iy.
"Politeness costs nothing, my
friend," remarked the kiudly man to
i the man of business."
j "Think not?" replied the business
! man. "If I were to be polite to some
• people I kuow it would encourage
; them to strike me for a fiver."—PuiU
• delphia Press.
Thoughtful Child.
I'jfh 1p)
Kind Little Willie—"Poor grand
pa's always losing his slippers. I'll
juat fix them so's they'll always he
where he wants 'em!"— New York
Journal.
Irritating Iteration.
"It amuses me to hear Hopperdyko
say lie is a mau of few words."
"Well, he is, but ho eau talk you to
death with the few he does kuow."—
Chicago Tribuue.
Knew the Symptom*.
Mr. Beach—"Hero is a letter from
Charles."
Mrs. Beach—"Read it."
Mr. Beach (readiug) "My dearest,
durliugest mother "
"Great heavens! The youug scoun
drel needs more money."—Tit-Bits.
Gone For Good, l'erlinp*.
Mrs. Author —"I don't think
lhat last publisher to whom you seut
youi* story will return it, do you,
dear?"
"Mr. Author—"lt is doubtful, my
love; I didu't have money enough to
scud him tbe necessary stamps."—
Ohio State Journal.
A Cliine llfttemhlnnce.
"How much did you get to-day?"
said the manager.
"Something like ten dollars," re
plied the collector, handing over the
bill. Aud the former, wheu he no
ticed it was a counterfeit, admitted
that it was much like teu dollars. -
Jersey City Farmer.
Culinary Deceit*.
"Ho prides himself ou his cynical
incredulity," remarked Willie Wash
ington.
"Yes," exclaimed Miss Cayenne;
"but ho is so very incousisteut. Ho
doubts what he reads iu tho papers,
but I have seen him believe every
word he saw ou a high-priced menu
card."—Washingtou Star.
A Young Financier.
Little Willie—"Are you going to
marry my sister Mamie, Mr. De
Joues?"
Mr. Do Joues (Maude's steady)— t
"Why, Willie, that's a fuuuyquestiou
to ask me. What do you want to
kuow for?"
Little Willie—"'Cause I heard her
tell mamma she would give a dollar
to kuow, audi ueed the niouey; see?"
A Tribute.
"I want to stop iu frout of this win
dow," said Mr. Blykius,
"Why, it's full of millinery!" ex
claimed his wife. "I didu't kuow vou
admired such things."
"I uot only admire; I marvel. I
take off my hat to genius, aud the
people who cau get 820 apiece for a
lot of bunches of odds aud euds like
those are qualified to give lessou3 tor
Napoleou of fiuuuce."
A Sign or lll.trust.
Smirking up to his mother oue day,
Tommy said:
"Ma, haven't I been a good boy
since I began going to Suuday-school?"
"Yes, my lamb," answered the
mother, fondly.
"Aud you trust me uow, don't you,
ma?"
"Yes, darling."
"Then what makes you keep tha
mince pies locked up in the pantry
tho same as erer?"- Collier's Weekly.