Freeiand Tribune Established I3SB. PUBLISHED EVKIIY MONDAY AND THURSDAY, BV THB nun MMM COMPANY, MM j Oiyicc: MAIN STREET ABOVE CENTRE. FIIEELAND, PA. SUBStItU'TION KATES: One Year $>1.50 Six Mouths 75 Four .Months . .50 i Two Mouths .23 ( The date which the subscription is paid to is on the address label of each paper, the 1 ohauge of which to a subsequent date be :omes a receipt for remittance. Keep the i figures in advance of the present date, lto port promptly to this ofllcu whenever paper ~e not received. Arrearages must bo paid when subscription is discontinued. Make all m n >j orders, checks, elc,,payabL to (he Tribum Printing Gi nipany, Limited. Chicago is to send hor hotel waiters to afternoon schools. Tho Central Presbyterian church of New York City has inaugurated spe- ' cial early services for Sufidays for the i beueiit of servants. It is a good idea j which ether churches should imitate. ! Venice can never have a trolley car, ! but she is about to take up a substi- j tute through the abandonment of the: picturesque gondolas which have ' come down from the times of the Doges j and the adoption of electric launches, j Mr. Ball, the amat mr English golf j champion, has 1 ecu ordered to South j Africa. This is a move in tbe right I direction. A regiment armed with golf ba :s stuffed with the weird clubs j proper to the game would strike ter- ; i or where a gutling would fail to make , an impression. A Hungar'a-i philologist, Dr. Anton j Vehcs, thinks he has discovered the original language of man. He has j found th it the great groups of lan- j guages, ludo-Gerinanic, Semitic Ham- ; 'tic, and Altaic, are all based on be tween 200 aud 800 aucient Chinese roots, some of which have disap peared from the Chinese language and are now only found iu Japanese. In the London hospital for con- i sumption the basis of treatment is rest in the open air, graduated oxer- ' cise, and good feeding. No window ! in the open-air wards is ever closed, ! and during the cold weather the con- | sumptive patients are kept warm j with extra clothing and artificial heat. 1 It is encouraging to note that practi- ! callv all the early cases and 70 per j cent; of all cases improve considerably under the open-air system. There exists at presentin Germany, ; distributed in 60) places, 861 schools j and institutes wherein manual training j is carried on in 1514 workshops. Oi I this number, 83G schools and insti tutes conduct the training on a peda gogical basis. Prussia has 570 maim- j al training schools, spread over 435 , places and distributed among 506 i workshops. Industrial centres take the lead as follows: Prussia, Upuer ! Bilosi i, the Rhenish Province and the Kingdom of Saxuny. Someone has said that when a man becomes a criminal, the earth seems 1 to be made of glass, or similar to a plain on which snow has just fallen, aud which reveals every footprint oi j the fugitive seeking to escape. The contemplation of these similes must be a fearful thing to the wrongdoer, ( and it cannot be denied that the al ] most certainty of detection and retrv butiou is a strong preventive of crime. ; The universal fallacy thai a man can j tiee from crime and escape its con sequences is being rapi Uy dissipated, j The great re- ort for defaulting bank cashiers and other dime novel heroes used to be Canada, and when once :i ! man had crossed, the frontier he wan -supposed to le sale. But very little time elapsed before the i nited St ite-r arranged ail extradition treaty with our northern neighbor, and the same agreement has been entered into by nearly all of the civilized countries ol the world. A maTi must bo indeed j shrewd and resourceful these days t<;' escape the long arm of the law. Mod j ei n methods of pursuit aud detection \ have materially improved ami it real ly seems, in one sense, that the world urmvintr smaller. Illt-w l'|i u mountain wien Dynamite. i lie blowing up of a mountain by dynamite was witnessed by sevr?ral hundred guests of the Pike's Peak Powder company. A dam was con structed across Beaver creek, near Cameron, Col., and a novel plan of re ducing Vesuvius Butte to building stone was hit upon. A tunnel, ICO feet long was run into the bluff and 30,00 D pounds of dynamite were planted at the terminus. The shock of the ex plosion shook the hills of the great gold camp. It was a noel sight. Hie Intransigeant states that 211 French army officers are lighting in the Boer army or are on the way to the Transvaal. WHEN CLO'JDS HANG LOW. IVlion clouils hang deep, Dense, tlilck and fog-like o'er the sua, tYe do not weop, But say that when the day is done. The clouds will vanish and the sad earth borrow Prosli splendor from the sunshine of to morrow. When clouds hang deep, Dense,thick nudfog-liko o'or thy soul, Tlioii shalt not weep. But say that soon the sullen clou Is will roll, Forth and away, and thy sa.l heart Its sor row Forget in the bright sunshine of to-mor row. —Bismarck Tribune, Q3303003303303D0003G0030C0 1 POLLY'S HIBHWAYIA.N! 6 o 033033309300333033000000G0 ' 111 DERRINGER was I L* the first object to Ml: I catcll m y eye when J V B'' jKftj * glanced casually i | i' ft i ll l o the pawn* IB ur-® i broker's window.' i |1 Tbe little, old-fush- Ijl | ft i 111 ioned pistol lay on U \m\V a Be l llftVo black <| i||,v velvet between half In v */' ft ozen watches II Jt ami n tray of for **** feited rings. Its handle, delicately inlaid with silver, its stubby barrel, exquisitely en graved, and the absurdly low price marked on the ticket beside it com bined to make the pistol a temptation beyond my resistance. I stepped within and made it mine, thinking, as I put down my money, of it hanging by a blue ribbon beneath the scimitar picked up by Polly heaven knows whore and how, that made warlike | one corner of hor room. When I gavo Polly the derringer she was delighted. When I spoke of the blue ribbon sho sniffed. "Well, hardly. I shall carry it," she said. "That is, on dark nights when I go out alone." "But it won't shoot," I objected. "The nipple's broken." "It will scare, and that's just as ' good. I shall carry it." Aud carry it she did, Again and again. Once when I laughed at hor she shrugged her shoulders indiffer ently and returned: "You can laugh now, but just wait. | Something will happen some tin: . I and I'll be glad I had it." j Polly slipped the derringer into pocket of her long coat, took up her purse aud the letters she intended mailing, and marched down into the darkness of the street. She had not gone over half a block toward the drug store, whither she was bound tor stamps, when a dark figure emerged from an alley she was passiug aud fell iu directly behind her. Polly quickened her pace, and her right hand slipped down into the pocket of her coat and found comfort in grasping the pistol's butt. The man slouched up behind her. "Please, lady, could you help a fellow out a bit?" he asked grufliy. Polly shrank from him iu alarm. "I haven't anything," she said, hur riedly, aud started to move rapidly away. He sprang about in front of her. "Give mo your pocketbook," ho de manded, making an attempt to snatch it. But Polly was on her guard, and thrust the hand that held the purse behind her back. Ho seized her by the left shoulder aud attempted to put a baud over her mouth. She Blippod out the derringer and thrust it directly iuto his face. "Take off your hands or I'll shoot," Bhe ordered. The man hesitated, then stepped back. Polly covered him with the pistol. "I just think I'll keop you here and call for a policeman. Don't you try to ruu. If you do I'll shoot." The liiau stood silent and unmov ing. Polly looked him over indignantly. "Now, areu't you ashamed of your self, you great big man, to try to hold up a woman?" sho demanded. "You wanted money, of course, why didn't you take it from a man, then—some one of your own size?" Polly could see that one foot was scraping uneasily on tho sidewalk aud that he was looking down. "I had to have money," he said, doggedly. "I couldn't take it from a man—l ain't strong enough." "Oh, come, now. You look big aud strong." "Yes, but when n man don't cat—" Polly saw his shoulders go up. "You're hungry?" There was a sudden note of concern in her voice. "I ain't carin' about myself," he I said, indifferently. Then he added, ' pulling his hut down over his eyes:! "It's the kids and—and—hor." | "Oh, there's a wife and children," said Polly, softly, and tlio derringer went down, until it was poiutiug at 1 the man's knees. "Why don't you work?" "Why don't I work? I've tried to get work." He spoke bitterly. "I've I been tryiu' for weeks. I tried all to ! day. I couldn't go borne without ' money aud see thorn, so I Ho spread wide his arms. "Oh, I don't give a rap." He caught himself up sharply, then laughed recklessly, i "It's all up. Shoot or turn me over to a copper." Polly gazed at his vague form for a full minute. Then the deri'inger fell to her side, and she spoke decidedly. | "Come down here to the corner ; where there's a street lamp. I want |to see your face. Oh, you've got to come, you know," she added, seeing | that he hesitated. He moved forward,aud side by side they walked to where a gas lamp was | making a feeble effort to overcome the i darkness. 'Then Polly saw a long face i that had been untouched by razor for a week, a haggard face with sunken I eyes and cheeks and a chin that had begun to droop. It was the face of a broken and starved man, and the look of recklessness upon it became it illy. The coat was buttoned and a pin held the collar closely about the ucck. "You say there is a wife aud chil dren?" Polly asked, slowly. He nodded. "But, see here," he . demanded, roughly, "what are you ; askin' me these questions for? It ain't none of your business." "Ob, yes, but it is," Polly returned, j confidently. "You see, I want to ; know. You said they hadn't anything —they were hungry?" Again the head nodded. "And she's sick," he added, briefly. "You were trying to steal for them?" "I couldn't let 'em starve," he re- . turned, apologetically, yet defiantly. . "Ol course not. You did just right. ; The man that'll steal for his wife aud , babies, if they're hungry, is enough ■ better than tho man that won't." She 1 nodded her head at him approvingly, j Ho stared at her in wonderment, ; and his loosoly-hung under jaw dropped down. "You thiuk GO— really?" he asked slowly. "Why, of course." "And—aud if you had a wife and some kids you'd steal for 'em?" He ! was much in earnest. "If I had a wife and some kids I'd steal for them," Polly returned, j promptly. "That is, if they were hungry. Of course I would." The man scraped one foot upon the pavement uervously. "Thel* you think I ain't so bad?" "Bad?" Polly spoke enthusiastic- ; ally. "Why, you're good! You're tine.'" He stared at her with the look of one who cannot understand. "Well, ! you're a queer 'un," ho said. But Polly did uot even hear his woi'Js. "Do you know, I think I owe you something," she declared. "I ouelit to have had something for von to take, and I ought to have lot you taken it. I didn't have anything and i you didn't get anything, so I'm in your debt. Now, you come aud walk up the street with me to the place where I live. I want to pay up." The mau's face showed even greater wonderment than before. "You mean you want to—give mo something?" Polly shrugged her shoulders. "II you want to put it that way. I'd rather call it paying a debt. It's something"—her voice agaiu grow soft aud she stepped up and laid her hand ou his arm—"it's something I owe the wife and tho kids." "After—after I tried to hold you up?" The man turned his head away. "Oh, I've forgotten that, I wish you had, aud had got something. Now, come on." The man aid not move. Polly tugged at his sleeve, still he did not move. Then she held the derringer up in front of his face. "Come," said she, lightly. "See, I can make you." Ho looked down into the smiling face, his own face—Polly saw tears on it—caught a bit of the smile he saw there, and without a word he walked away with her. When they reached the house iu which sho lived, Polly hurried within after ordering him to wait a minute. At its end she was back beside him. i 'Here, this is yours," she said, hold ing a bill out to him. He made no effort to take it, and Polly could sco that his hands were twisting about each other. "How much?" he asked finally. "Oh, uot milcli—only $5. "Five dollars! No—llo—l can't take it—l can't!" lie cried, brokenly, j Polly took one of the twisting hands aud thrust the money into it. "But you must—it's for the wife an* tho kids," she whispered. "Yes, yes, for them," he said, ea gerly, and his baud closed about the bill. There was a long silence. The man was breathing heavily and Polly was beginning to feel as though sho j wanted to cry. Sho was the first to speak, and for tho first time that night she was timid. "If you don't mind," she said,wist fully, "I think I'd rather like to shake hands with you." The man seized the hand Polly held out to him. "Good night," she whispered. "I—l"—he started, but something caught in his throat aud his voice broke. Polly felt the lingers about her hand twitch nervously. He tried to speak again, and again liis voice broke. Suddenly lie dropped lier hand, turned about and, head down, hurried away into the darkness. Extent or lnaclcmailliijc In Peru. Blackmailing in Peru has in many directions been reduced to a regular practice, and is, unfortunately, too often successful in attaining its end. Tho judicial officials get salaries so low that the temptation to accept bribes is invariably before them—a temptation which they are said by com mon report to be unable to resist in the great majority of cases. Crime is not so prevalent in Peru as might rea sonably be expected iu view of tile low state of civilization of the greater part of the inhabitants. 111 1808 tho number of prisoners undergoing sen tence for serious offences was 1406, of r. whom 404 were condemned for homicide, 50 for attempted homicide, 340 for robbery, 226 for assault, and the remainder for various crimes* Tho total number of police employed to maintain order in 1808 was 714, and of mounted geudnrmerie 514. This total of 1228 officers and men ic a very scanty number when the great extension of territory is considered, and yet the force is suf ficient if the duties were efficiently aud intelligently performed. S>SX£. T'<V'-£ ® iXSXft 8 I 1 TALES OF FLOCK : : AND ADVENTURE. I Gallantry in llie Philippines. IN October Major Howard, of the United States forces now in the Philippines, took the Oceania r 9 down to Arayat, in Luzon, and from there started to slowly struggle no stream against the swift curient, with two great cascos of supplies. It should bo remembered that this boat was unarmored. She had one Nordeu feldt tivc-barrel rapid-fire gun on her, which constantly jammed, and which the insurgeuts had learned was in effective when they had fired upou her several times in the lower courses of the river. There were two as in trepid white men in chargo of her as ever fired a gun—Sergeant Harris in ; command and Engineer O'Neii, who had been one of Young's scouts. The rest of the crew, five iu number, were Filipinos. With Major Howard was his civilian clerk, Chamberlain, ! and two civilian blacksmiths, who were going up to report to the cavalry regimeut. The cascos were furnished with a guard of twenty armed soldiers, but, unfortunately enough, they were all beneath the heavy bowed mats which cover this class of boat—invisible, and useless iu the eveut of au attack. The boat whistled as she rounded tho great bend at tho mouth ol the Bio Chico, which stretches offtoward Tailac, as a warning to the Oeste, less than a quarter of a mile above. Major Howard sat in a chair at tho bow of the boat; Chamberlain sat near him, but toward the right, and slightly screened by the awning from the high river bank on the left, only seventy-five yards away, and was talking to one of the blacksmiths. There was a blinding volley from the uoddiug grass ou shore. Four meu iu tho boat fell—Major Howard, shot through the great artery near the heart; Chamberlain, through the shoulder and arm; the blacksmith, through the back and abdomen, and the pilot, in the forearm. Every man in sight at the time had been bit. Major Howard staggered to his feet, ghostly white aud gasping. He moved toward Chamberlain, who lay paralyzed by shock on the deck, but who screamed in excitement, "Ob, Major, you are shot?" The Major's only answer, as he fell to lie silent forever, was "For God's sake, keep lier going, whatever you do!" Tho Filipino pilot dived into the hold. Sergeant Harris rushed for the quick-firing gun, grabbing another Filipino on the way aud placing him at the wheel. He fired one volley from the gun; then it jammed. He took off the feed cases, pulled the empty cartridges with a hand-ejector, reloaded it by hand and fired two vol leys through the cauvas awning above him, as that was the only way he could elevate sufficiently to reach tho am bushed enemy. The second steers man was shot through the back, and a third one was forced to the wheel by the sergeant; then the wheel itself was shattered by a bullet; but still the launch forged ahead, and tho brave sergeant fired two parting volleys at three hundred yards. O'Neil, as soon as ho got his fright ened Filipino firemen and assistants iu the engine room straightened out, bolted ou deck, grabbed a rifle, and standing exposed 011 the stern of the boat, fired shot after shot where the grass was lit up with tho flashes Jof gu us. The gallantry of these two men was of such a remarkable nature as to place them well within the category oi heroes. As they rounded the bend of the river, aud came in sight of tho Oeste, the latter opened up with her revolv ing cannon in the general direction of tho firing. Lieutenant Simmons had been afraid to fire earlier for fear lie might strike the Oceania. Tho guard on the cascos clambered out, 0110 by one, through a hole, like rats in a trap, before tho firing entirely ceased, and auswered the lire from tho bank. The enemy had ma do a clever move, strictly within the limits of civilized warfare; they had attempted to cap ture an armed launch and their antag onists' subsistence supplies, which they would have poled up tho "dio Chico to a point near Torino. They failed, but they killed one of the best quartermasters iu the army. Knightly l>;etl of a Hoy Hero. As knightly a deed as minstrels have Bling was that of Willie Coch rane, four years old, who gave his life a few days ago to savo his baby sister. His doughty deed of chivalry was douo iu a crowded Brooklyn street, and tho hospital aud police reports tell the tale. Willie went to market witli his mother, Mrs. Alfred Cochrane, as evening was falling. Ilis little sister Cora, two years old, had clamored to "go, too," and Willie held her hand as they crossed Myrtle avouue from | their house, at No. -CD. ; While Mrs. Cochrane went iuto a store the children stood on the side walk. "Look! There's auntie!" crowed the baby sister, ami trotted across the street to meet Mrs. Cochrane's sister, who was approaching the house. Willie glanced up the street ancl stood for a heart-beat's time in horror. A trolley car, rushing down tho steep grade, was almost upon little Cora Ho darted like a football player to his sister, who was already on the track. He pushed her aside with all his childish strength. She was safe, but that moment tho fender, with a terrified liiotorman struggling behind \t, had struck him. Willie's body was burled high in the air and fell at one side of the track. The car rushed ahead for a block before the brakes could work. Mrs. Cochrane, running wild-eyed from the store, saw her eldest baby bleeding in the street. One of liis legs was terribly crushed and liis face was bleeding, disfigured by muuy cuts. The mother—she is only twen ty-one years old—fainted at the sight. Willie was in the Brooklyn Hospital when she recovered. Then they told her she was wanted at the hospital. The boy's leg must be taken off, tbey told her, and her presence wan necessary. Nerving her self for a new ordeal she hastened to tho place, A nurse met her at the door. "Your brave little darling will suf fer 110 more," she told the stricken mother. "Ho is dead." The shock was too much, aud Mrs. Cochrane was carried uncouscious to another bed in the ward where her son lay. "You will be proud, for all your sorrow, to be the mother of that boy," said the house surgeon, to rouse her. But this was her hour of lamentation, when heroic thoughts do not comfort, l.aced Two Miles to Save a Woman. George Double, trackman on the Hudson lliver Bail road, whose home is iu Fonghkeepsie, saved a woman's life recently in a heroic manner. He was at work on the tracks at Low Point when 110 saw a neatly dressed middle-aged wcuiuri start to cross tho river on the ice. The steamer Trem per JJliad Jjust passed south, plowing 1 through the chopped ice in tho chan- I nel. The woman walked directly to ward the channel, as if she meant to try and cross it on the cakes of ice. Deuble watched her until ho saw her walk into the channel and sink, clinging to the ice Hoes. He ran down the track to where a train stood on the old Troy switch. He uncoupled the! engine and started down the track to where 110 could get a row boat. This ho got about a mile south of where he saw the woman struggling in the ice choked channel. Ho induced a man who was walking tho track to accompany him out to the channel. Together they shoved tho boat over the ice until the channel was reached. Looking up the river, they saw the woman apparently cling iug to the ice and being swept along with the current. The men hastened to her assistance and managed to lift her into the boat, in which they soon brought her to safe ice. The woman was nearly over come with cold and fright. Her bauds were cut and bleeding from contact with the ice. - Deuble and his com panion, whose name he did not learn, took the wonan to Low Point, where she was put to bed in a hotel aud cared for. She said her name was Anna Bedford, and that her home was iu Ulster County. Averted a Kufllr War. At this moment, saj's tho London j Chronicle, tho following anecdote of the famous Sir Harry Smith, after' whose wife the town of Ladysmith is ! named, may not be without interest. | The Kaffirs had shown a tendency to ! rebel, and Sir Harry summoned the ! chiefs to a conference, and arrauged a speech about the greatness of Eug- j laud. At a proper-place he was to I touch the spring of a galvanic battery j carefully connected with some kegs of gunpowder piaced under a wagon ! which was to bo blown to'pieces. Sir | Harry commenced bis speech. Tho ! crisis arrived. Tho connection was made; but, unfortunately, the wagon was only tilted ou end. Notwith- j standing tho failure of the carefully rehearsed drama, the interview did not come to ail end without a real theatrical performance. One of the chiefs ventured to express a doubt of the iuteutions of the British. This was too much for Sir Harry. Carried away by a fit of rage, he drew his sword, aud, presenting it at tho naked breast of the savage, he swore he would run him through if he did not there aud then take an oath of obedi ence to tho Government. The as sembled chiefs were cowed l>y the un wonted outbreak. Quo after another they subscribed the required submis sion, and Sir Harry's wrath—Mr. Nixon, tho traveler, who tells the story, says—averted a Kaffir war. I'olil by 1111 lSnglneer. "To run over a man—perhaps that's tho only thing of all that shakes me," •aid an engineer. "To see him on the track within ten or twenty feet of you; to know that you can't stop to save him; to feel the wheels of tho en gine go over his body, crunching out his life—a man doesu't want to ex perience that more than once iu a lifetime. "It's worse with a child. There was an old mate of mine in the West, when f was riding in tho Union Pacific— never mind his namo, he's dead now. AH good au engineer as ever stood in a box, cool an the devil, nerve like steel, liad been through three wrecks, a hold-up and a lire. Well, one day Jim was a little bohincl his schedule, and made like anything for tho next stop. There was a crossing right in front of him. He saw that everything was clear, as he thought, and went right ahead, when all at once, out of a clump of trees, there ran a little golden-haired fairy right in front of tho engine. It was all over in one in stant, aud when the train stopped Jim dropped like a log. It was two mouths before ho crept back again to work. But ho could never come to that cross ing but he saw the little girl with her hair fluttering in the wind, running out from the trees. Aud one day ho just got off his engine,* turned it over to the second man and walked away, never to be seen again, until his body was found in tho river." Russian soldiers are supplied with handkerchiefs at tho expense of the Government. ®H°us e j| o ld V/ !NCREASINC_VOCUE OF LAMPS. A Few Helpful SuKKCgtlons For lle Liusj llousewire. The manufacture of lamps has in creased to a wonderful degree The great bugbears about lamps are the chimneys and wicks; ou these and on tho keroseue odor depend the ob jections. All of these may be readily overcome. A perfect chimney for any lamp should bo as large in diameter as the brackets of the burner will per mit; it should be as high as conveni ent, and not too narrow toward the top. The cost of maintaining a lamp in daily use is not more than one eighth that cf any other illuminant. It is also the only true artificial light for the eyesight. Soft and untiring, steady and mellow, it is most grateful to the eyes. ' As to the best colors in globes, yel low or white gives the best Jesuits. Green is not so desirable, and al though much affected by students and others who burn the midnight oil, it is easy to be seen that the area of il lumination is contracted, while in the daytime 110 lamp can show to advan tage when hooded in tho dark shroud of the green glass. There are about eighty-live styles of burners on the market, and the great trouble is with the wicks. This is a crucical test of patience to the housewife or the maid who has the care of the lamps. lie wickiug, which is necessary so often; the care of the wicks, rubbing the wick each morning; the charred por tion, which insists in falling on the burner with the intelligence of orig inal sin; the gummy substance which forms on tho tubing around the wick —all these are exasperating trials. All these may easily be overcome by a few simple rules, so that almost any lamp will give satisfaction. First, be careful to see that"the wick space, or tube, is perfectly straight and even, so that the wick will not bind anywhere. Next see that the draught support is perfect and ade quate to support a large flame. Also, do not neglect to have the reservoir at least two-thirds full of oil. Lamps are many times blamed for giving a poor light when tho whole fault lies with the maid who did not feed the lamp enough food to support its life. Last and well nigh most important of all, see that you have the proper wick. It should not fit the space too tight ly, should not bo woven too com pactly, and should be made of a ma terial as nearly non-combustible as ij practical. Lastly, the housewife who really understands the care of her lamps will give the reservoir a thorough cleaning once a month, and if tho wick has becomo clogged with the waste matter it has drawn up, she will replace it with a now one. Properly handled, nothing will give so much real pleasure aud such a sense of liar mouy as the lump, while, for decora tive purposes, notbiug can compare with it. A Deitsert (jiiicldy Prepared. When it is required to prepare des sert oil a busy day, apples stuffed with almonds are simple and satisfactory. Pare and core them, fill with chopped abaouds, and sprinkle with brown su-iar. Bake until tender, dippiugtho jutfbe over them frequently to form u glaze, and when perfectly cold serve iu whipped cream. Ilintft For tlie Housewife. The colder eggs are the quicker thoy will froth. Dried orange peel, allowed to smoul der, will kill a bad odor. Flowerpot stains may be removed froui window-sills with line wood ashes. Jars kept for the use of creams should be thoroughly cleaned when emptied. Good m acaroui has a yellowish hue, does not break while cooking, and swells to twieo its bulk. To keep the 1$ itehen pipes free from grease, mineral oil should frequently be poured down the sink. Mustard water is useful for clcans iug the liauds after touching onions or any other malodorous substance. All cake tins should be lined with evenly buttered paper before baking. All good cakes should have a sheet of paper placed on the top. If a wooden pail begins to leak, fill it with water and theu stand it in a tub of Avater. This will swell tLe wood and it will leak no more. A gargle of salt and water strength ens the throat and, used hot, will cure a sore throat. As a tooth-powder salt will keep tho teeth white and the gums hard and rosy. An English expedient for saving the corners of tablecloths and slieeis xrom being torn on the clothesline consists in reiuforciug them with tape. Tho tape is laid ou fiat aud hemmed down for two or three inches each side of tho corner. Fruit jars can be quickly and easily sealed or opened by a new mnchiue, which has two independent levers, provided with adjustable collars, to engage the cover and jar respectively, a pnii on tho levers tightening the collars aud turning the cover. There are many small houses iu Holland, and to economize space many of the tables are made to close or to turn up ngainst the side of the Avail. The right side or top of the table is turned to the wall and tho under side, being out, is inlaid and ornamented as well as the other. THE TABLES TURNED. (A Twentieth Century Drama.) The woman she sat in her dusty den, Her papers all scattered about, Whileshe toilsomely sought, with pipe and pen, To straighten her business out, When a sudden cry Of agony From her husband smote her ear:— "Help! Hell)! Be quickl Oh, it makes me sick! I shall die if you don't come here!" The woman she strode across the floor, Au anxious frown oil iter brow. And she tenderly said, as she opened the door, "What troubles m/ Poppet now?" For percbod on a chair High up in air That frantic man sue found, And he gave a shriek At every squeak Of tho mouse that pluyed around. "Just look!" he sobbed, with his coat held high, As he poised 011 tho tip of his toe; "What a savage jerk of his tail! Oh, ray! It will run up my clothes, I kuow! llow its eyeballs glare! And Its mouth —see, there! Oh, it's going to jump! lie quick!" Thus tho mau wailed ou Till the mouse v/as gone, Scared off by the womuu's stick. The woman she smiled at Ills pretty fear 3 In a fond, superior way, While he strove to check the bursting tears, As he breathlessly watched the fray. Then the "man to the floor She liblped once more, And lovingly kissed and caressed. Her strong arm she wound His frail form around, And he wept out hts fright 011 her breast. —Harloui Life. HUMOR OF THE DAY. She—"l can sympathize Avith yon. I was married once myself." He— "But you Averen't married to a worn au."—Cincinnati Enquirer. Casey—"See here! that dollar yo lent me yisterday AVUZ a counterfeit." Cassidy—"Well, Casey, didn't ye say ye wanted it bad?"— Judge. Now tho plumber rules the roost, The Icoinau's reign is o'er; But it's fun to seo the plumber at Tho haughty iceman's door. —Chicago News. Knicker—"Wonder why Cholly's :o popular Avith the girls? He can't even express himself." Bocker—"No; but his father can pay the freight!"— Puck. "She pays her butler S3OOO a year." "Yes; thero are so few butlers who are roally competent and yet look less important than her husband."—De troit Journal. "I'd lay my life down for you," pro tested tho poetical lover. "Yes," argued the practical maiden, "but would you lay down the carpets?"— Philadelphia Record. "Gentlemen of the jury," said an eloquent Q. C., "remember that my client is hard of hearing, aud lhut t therefore, the voice of conscience ap peals to him in vain!"—Tid-Bits. Harry—"l've got an awful big ap pettite, grandmamma; can't you lend mo your spoctacles?" Grandmamma —"What for?" Harry—"To make this piece of pie bigger."—Judge. Teacher—"Yes, Johnnie, Ave get milk from an animal called the cow." Johnnie (a pupil from the country)— "But, teacher, if you dou'tknow how to milk you get kicks."—Harlem Life. Bacon—"Borne people carry a joke too far." Egbert—"Yes. Penman carried one to fourteen different news paper offices, I understand, and didn't sell it even theu."—Ybukors Statesmun. Au astonishing incident occurred during a recent lire in a piauo ware room. A fireman who had no previous knowledge of music picked up the hose and played on a piau.o.—Phila delphia Record. Customer (in a rage)—" When I buttoned your coat for the first time it split down tho back!" Clothing Dealer—"lndeed? It must be, then, that tho buttons were sewed ou too strongly."—Filegenne Blaetter. "Now, William, isn't this coffee as good as that your mother used to make?" "It is better than that she raado at home, Elleu—much better. But it isn't as good as that she used to make for church socials." —ludiuu- apolis Journal. Professor—"There's 0110 more ques tion—andthelast!" Student (greatly pleased)—" Yes, sir!" Professor—"lb is this. How could you have the as sumption, with your ignorance of tho subject, to attempt to pass this ex amination?" —Der Floh. "Freddie," said his mother, se verely, "didn't I tell you that you shouldn't ride your bicycle to-day, be cause you Avero naughty?" "This isn't my bicycle," said Freddie; "it's Tommy Jones's. We've exchanged just for to-day."—Harper's Bazar. Her Nice, Gentle Way. Slio was a pretty girl, pretty enough to attract the attention of two young men who were walking up Wgst End avenue. And she was expostulating Avith a small fox-terrier Avhich Avas tug ging at his strap. "It's nice to see a girl talking in that confidential Avay to u pet, don't you think?" said one of tho young men. "Decidedly, I do," v/as tho rejoin der. By this time the pretty girl was al most abreast of the two aud her aweefc and earnest tones were distinctly audible. "Now, Teddy," she was saying, "if you don't behave, I'll break your head for you." The young men passed on in si lence.—New York Mail and Express. Lunatic l'ostofllee*. In the lunatic asylums of Belgium thero are securely locked boxes iu which every, inmate may deposit let* ters of complaint. Three timos a week these letters are collected by outside officials, who investigate every case, and if a person asserts that he is not iusano a prompt ex amination ensues by medical experts,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers