There is n new industry in the Wosfc t robbers knocking men's teeth out to secure ibe gold fillings. Au illustration, of tho ferment that is' goiug on iu B.issia is found in the number of new religious sects con stantly arising. An addition of 811,000,000 a year will be made to the Prussian Govern ment expenses by the proposed in crease of the salaries aud pensions of officials, teachers and tbeir families. "Coal lauds, iion lands, copper lands, in fact, under the present sys tem of taxation, every district in which wild lands have a great natural value, practically escape taxation/' as serts the American Agriculturist. Experiment stations of tho United States are institutions that have as sumed large proportions. There are fifty-four of them,all but two of which are mainly supported by the Hatch fund of $15,000 per year from the Federal treasury to each State. Tho total payments from that source list year for i x/orunent stations was $720,000, and the New England Home stead thinks it will surprise most peo ple to know that the various States contributed aid to the stations to the amount of $208,000, while individuals and communities gave over SSOOO, and fees for fertilizer analyses and other work amounted to $52,000. Farm products were sold to the value of $70,000. His Majesty the King of Siara, who will return to his country byway of the United States alter a visit to Eu rope this summer, is expected to reach New York in the early part of ►Sep tember, and will remain in America about a month. The Bangkok news papers say this about the trip : "The European tour is expected to occupy about eight months, and, according to present arrangements, his Majesty's suit will consist of T. 11. 11. Princes Sommot, Mabit, aud Sanphasat, Phva Hrisdi, Nai llajauat, Mom Anuyat, and two royal pages. During the voyage to Europe H. R. H. Prince Sanphasat will act as aide-de-camp to his Majesty, but on arrival those duties will bo un dertaken by H. R. H. Prince Chirax. H. R. H. Prince Swasti Sobhon will also meet the King in Europe." On his visit here the King will visit Wash ington, Chicago, St. Louis, Denver, Salt Lake City and San Francisco. He will take passage at San Francisco on one of the Occidental and Oriental line steamships to Yokohama, where the royal yacht will meet him and convey him back to Bangkok. Harper's Weekly says: A symptom of the modern tendency in rnral life to approach urban compactness, which tho trolley car has been one of the potent influences to help along, has taken on recently a new form in the attempt made to revise the old-time district school. In most conutry towns of New England, and in the Middle and Western States, the sys tem dividing a township into from live to twenty school districts still prevails. A generation ago no one could have conceived of the practica bility of any change in this plan. From the very beginning ot our na tion's history it has been the district school that has furnished the loftiest and most inspiring theme for the ora tor and the poet. Tn Whittier's poem of "The Little Red School House" all of us who have grown up from coun try bred childhood find our earliest and most tender memories refreshed. It certainly was a boon in its day; but it would seem there are reasons now for replacing it by a better species* In some of the Western Reserve Ohio towns schools of this sort have already been abolished, and in their stead may bo found in a central part of tho township a large two-storied structure, usually made of brick. The school having this liberal space can, from its systematized and various grades, make education more complete and carry it further than the best district school has ever been able to do. To this central point all the school chil dren are brought in stages furnished for free transportation by the town. The vehicles hold about twenty-five pupils, are comfortably fitted up, and are arranged so as to be either open or covered. The routes, which aro made to pass every house, are open to competitive bidders. The drivers of the stages go in the morning to tho extremest limits of tho township, and blow a horn when within car-shot of a house to notify the children who aro to take passage. When tho school hours aro over, the stage reappears, and the scholars are taken home. Tho system has been going about two years, but it is said to work perfectly. It needs no argument to show that this massing of scattered forces brings many advantages. | HE WORRIED ABOUT IT. | When the weather was murkv, he gazed at j I the sky And lie worried about it; lie watched the gray cloudlets go scurrying by, And ho worried about it; I "I'll hot it will rain," lie would sny to a friend. All manner of dire disaster portend; His life was one fret from beginning to end, For he worried about it. : He lia l a few troubles, a* human kind will. Ami he worried about it, The good he belittled aud magnified ill, Aud ho worried about it; Ilis health was nigh perfect, but then, if you please, He fancied he hnd mostly every disease, And martinled his ailments iu columns of threes, And he worried about it. No doubt when be entered the world long He worried about it: As a matter of fact, when he married, you know, lie worrie 1 about it. And when ho departs from this scons of de spair. And mounts on li .-bt win is thro' ethereal When ushered right up to a heavenly chair, He'll worry about it. —St. Paul Dispatch. THE LOST*ISLAND. J)®< A K h-nl callej at K \A# Mauritius ou our way from Liver (SJ i pool to Bombay vA/Fk VVxN> tUe sUip Fare- WM 1 well, aud were five Cffi t ,T V \;X days out from the Üb\V\ island when the ad eft ii i Vtv \ venture occurred A>i\ b .Y which we lost fejj'3 \ jVj the captain aud v laid tho fouuda- W tion for this story. It was three o'clock in the afternoon of a bright day, and the ship was not making above four knots au hour. What sea there was on would not have bothered a quarter boat, aud the ship lifted to a wave only at long intervals. The second mate and I were superintending some work forward, while the captain was alone on the quarter deck. All of a sudden, aud without tho slightest warning, tho sea began to boil and : heave under and around us iu the most violent manner, aud lor five minutes every man had to hold on for his life. In her pitching the craft shipped three or four green seas, which cleared the decks cf everything movable, but wo were congratulating ourselves that all had escaped when the captain was found to be missing. The man at the wheel had had a nar row escape from being swept over board, aud for two or three minutes had lost sight of Captain Graham. The last sea we shipped had no doubt carried him away, aud by tho time we had come to this conclusion it was too late to make any move. Tho sea had been disturbed by an earthquake. Just whore we were when the agitation begun the chart showed tho depth to lie a lull mile. Three months later, when soundings were taken by a French vessel, it was found that a mountain, two miles in circum ference at the base, had been heaved up until its crest was only forty feet below the surface. The set of wind aud wave before and after tho agita tion was to tho westward, aud teD minutes after tho ship had come back to a level keel tho wind changed to tho east and blew half a gale for the next seven hours. As a matter of record, tho ship pursued her voyage and mado tho port of Bombay without further adventure, and tho remainder of tho story relates to tho captain. He was swept overboard by the last wave, just as we concluded, and pres ently found himself far to leeward among a lot of spars aud casks which tho samo wave had taken from the main deck. While the man seized a spar and passed a lashing around his body, ho had no hope of rescue. Almost before he realized his posi tion the ship was a mile away, aud he felt sure that no boat would be low ered to make a search for him. The spar to which ho was lashed drifted away to the west and evening came on. Between five o'clock and sunset four ships passed the drifting man, but all too Jar away to see or hoar, and when night came down ho felt that there was no longer the slightest chance Jor him. He drifted to tho westward, as I have told you, but how far has never boon known. Night passed and another day came, and toward the close ot that day Cap tain Graham lost consciousness. He may have drifted u day after that— perhaps two days. When he came to his senses again he was lying on a sandy beach, with his feet in the water. He bad been cast ashore on an island. It was surelv an island to the north and west of Madagascar, but for reasons which will bo explained later on it eaunot be more definitely located. For an hour after opening his eyes the man could not uulash him self from the spar. When ho had finally accomplished that object he had to crawl on hands and knees to reach the shade of the bushes. It was high noon and the weather hot, and the Captain was so exhausted that if he had not found fresh water aud wild fruit at hand ho must have perished. Ho ate and drank his fill ami then slept, and the sun was just rising next morning when ho awoke. Tho island, when the castaway came to survey it, was about two miles and a half loug by one milo in breadth, and ts average height abovo tho sea was not over fifteen feet. It was of volcanic origin and was entirely cov ered with verdure, and there were six or seven different sorts of wild fruits. Along tho beach were oysters and shellfish in abundance, and the Cup- : tain soon assured himself that starva tion would not be one of the perils ot his situation. What struck him curi ously was the entire absence of life on the island. There was neither animal nor bird, reptile nor insect. There should have been a dozen varieties of birds and an abundance of insect life on so fair a spot with its tropical cli mate, but it was simply tenantless. And yet there was life there, and where the castaway least expected. |He had been on the island a week or so, and had twice walked clear around it, when one day as he was gathering fruit iu au open spot he was suddenly and fiercely attacked by a naked man. The surprise was great, and the Cap tain had not yet recovered his strength, but, shaking the man oil', ho seized Jn club and laid about him so vigorously that his assailant ran away. It was a white mau, and from the marks on his hands ho must have been a sailor. How long he had lived there and how he reached the island in the I first place are maters for conjecture, but the fact of his being nude went to show that he hud been there long I enough to wear out his clothes. In breaking away from the Captain he ran for the beach. The latter followed at his heels, shouting for him to stop, but the unknown ran to the water, plunged iu, and swmn straight out to sea, looking back now and then and seeming to be in a terrible fright. He held to his course until he could no longer be seen, and there wasiio doubt he went to his death, as he did not re turn. In a dense thicket the Captain found a rude shelter which the man had used, aud among the dried grass forming his bed were a few fragments of cloth, which had once been a pea jacket. There was also a sailor's pipe and an empty tobacco box. Living there alono for years and years, with neither the note of a bird nor the chirp of a cricket to cheer him, the man had lost his mind, and, looking upon Cap tain Graham as an intruder, had meant to take his life. When the castaway had been a month ou the island without sighting a sail, ho made up his mind that the fate of the poor fellow who had dashed into the sea would some day be his. Only the surf beating on the shore aud tho wind sighing through tho trees broke the maddening silence brooding over the island, and tho man shouted with delight when a gale swept out of the west and blew down scores of trees about him. Ho felt that he would soon lose his mind unless he made a great effort to divert it from tho gloomy situation, ami he began a closer survey of the island. The centre of it was considerably higher than elsewhere, and exactly in the middle was a single tree, surrounded by a thicket which ho had never yet penetrated. In carrying out his ex plorations ho entered this copse, find ing a hard beaten path, evidently made by a crazy man. Piled up at the roots of the tree tho Captain found a great stoak of small, iron-bound boxes, and it needed but one glance to satisfy him that they were treasure boxes. There was tho cavity where they had once been buried, and the boxes were weather beaten us if long oxposed. Two or three large shells lay about, which had doubtloss been used to dig out tho dirt, and one of the boxes had been opened. The Captain shouldered this box and carried it down to the spot he called "home," and there inspected its contents. In contained about SGOOO in gold coin of all nations, but prin cipally English, and not a coin among them was of recent date. In fact, there wore some which no longer cir culated in England or India. Erom the material and construction the Captain judged that the boxes had been made by a ship's carpenter. In the pile at the i .ot of the tree were lifteen other boxes of the same size. One was broken open, and its contents found to be the same as the first, and the amount very nearly the same. There was a total, as the Captain figured, of §IOO,OOO more or less. This was based on the supposition that all the boxes contained gold, but as he looked into only two he could not be sure of the contents of the others. How came the treasure there? Cap tain Grnharn believed it tobe apiratu's cache, and that the gold had been there long years before he was thrown on the beach. Pernaps the mad sailor had been one of the pirate crew. It was certain that ho had unearthed the treasure at any rate, and it was hardly probable that je stumbled upon it by accident. Well, there was a big fortune there, and it belonged to the finder, but it might have been so much sand for all the good it could do him. Hays and weeks and months passed away, and one day the castaway counted the pob bles he had laid in rows along the beach to mark the time, and found that he had been eleven months on the island. On that day thore came a furi ous gale from the east, with a very high tide, and from some wreck at sea the waves brought in a vast quantity of Btuff. There was nothing to cat or to wear among tho wreckago, but there were planks and spars and a carpenter's tool chest, and as soon as the storm had abated the castaway went to work to build him a raft. He hud determined to leave tho island at any hazard, and after four or five days' work he had his raft completed. It was a rudo but stout affair. Wild fruits were taken for provisions, and fresh water was taken in a wine keg which had come ashore with the wreckage. From one of tho boxes the Captain took SSUO in gold pieces, and one morning when tho wind was from tho west ho launched his raft and drifted off before it. By his reckon ing, which is probably correct, it was seven days before he was picked up by tho John J. Speed, an American mer chant vessel, homeward bound. Tho raft had rnado good weather of it, drifting most of the time to the east, and the captain judged her total ! drift to have been one hundred miles. | His loss had been alluded to in the j newspapers and talked of among sailors, and he ws given a hearty j welcome aboard the American. He | related his adventures in full, except as to the treasure, and in duo time was landed at Capo Town. He had ligured out the latitude and longitude of his island to his own satisfaction, but the chart on board the Speed failed to show any such island. Cap tain Graham at once set about finding a ship to bring the treasure off. A brig was fiually chartered, but after a cruise of mouths she failed to find the island. Where Graham said the island ought to be lead lound bottom at forty feet, and in the immediate neighbor hood a mass of trees and bushes was found floating about. But for certain things the whole story would have been put down to sheer imagination. It was a fact beyond dispute that Captain Graham was swept overboard. He was picked up off a raft eleven months later. Where had he lived in the interval if not on an island? There was the raft to prove his Rtorv, and how about the gold pieces? Some of them were so old as to have an additional value as souvenirs, and scores of people at the Cape handled them. Where did ho get the money if not from ouo of the treasure boxes on the island? In the space of two years he made three different voyages in search of his island, and when the story leaked out three or four other expeditions were fitted out. but in all the sailing to and fro no human eye could find the looked for spot. It had been raised from tho sea by a volcanic distur bance. Had a second disturbance caused tho sea to swallow it up? There are many reasons to believe that this was the fate which overtook it. About ten years after the cap tain's last voyage a volcanic island, which was simply a barren rock about a mile in circumference, was pushed above water about where his island was supposed to be, and it is there to day with a fringe of trees all around its outer edge, it ha 3 been searched ! inch by inch for treasure, but not a a single gold piece has yielded up. Flowers Delivered by Wire. If you wish to send a box of Ameri can beauties to some person in San Francisco to-night you can buy thorn in Chicago and have them delivered fresh and fragrant within half an hour. If your fair one resides in New Orleans, Boston or Philadelphia, or auy other large American city, you can do the same thing in the same way. It can be done even in the Eu ropean capitals. Florists of the United States are in a pool for the rapid delivery of blos soms. The pay for the service is ef fected by a system of trade balances through a sort of cloaring house. You go to a florist in Chicago and tell him you waut to send two dozen American beauties to so and so in San Francisco. He makes out a bill, plus the cost of a telegram, takos the money, and the flowers are in the hands of the reci pient almost as quickly as if delivery were made in Chicago. The telegraphic delivery of flowers is called into play frequently. If a friend is to bo married and some one who hoped to attend the ceremony caunot do so for any reason, it is a pleasure to know that a vase of roses takes the place of the absent one. If he likes, his card may bo attached to the white ribbon that binds the long stems loosely together. Wlicu death comes suddenly a tri bute may be placed upon tbo casket of the departed almost us if laid thero by the loving hands of the sender. In Piccadilly and Regent street, London, thero are two French florists who carry on a sort of International floral clearing house. There is no agency or member in Chicago. But from New York one can order flowers sent to friends in Loudon, Brighton, Paris, Berlin, Nice, Home, Madrid, Alexandria, Constantinople, Vienna and St. Petersburg.—Chicago Tribune. Third Set of Upper Teetli. Mrs. J. J. Lower, an aged lady, re siding at Orrville, Wayne County, Ohio, is experiencing a singular freak of nature in the way of cutting her third set of upper teeth, she having lost her original second sot ten years ago, after a severe attack of sickness. Early last tall she suffered greatly from weakness of her eyesfght and an inflamed condition of her eyes. Sinco then she also suffered from much swelling and pain of the gums. Tuo result is a largo-sized eye tooth, which is almost full grown, while other teeth are rapidly pushiug their way through the gums. Br. Eugene D. Yager, who extracted and made Mrs. Lower's arti ficial teeth, pronounces the case al most unknown in the history of den tistry.—Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Tree Clock. Professor Roberts, of Cornell, has growing around his house what he calls a "tree clock." Trees are planted in such positions that one of them will shade a portion of the house at everv hour of sunlight. For example, ex* plains Rural New Yorker, at 9 o'elqck in the morning the "9 o'clock tree" shades a part of the piazza, while, as the sunlight changes, the •'lO o'clock tree" shades another part, and so on through the day. On a hot summer day this "tree clock" insures a suc cession of shady places around tU/ house. The Banana King's Biff. John G. Garibaldi, of Chicago, known throughout the Northwest as the "Banana King" is to build a home in Chicago for aged and indigent Italians. The Italian colony in Chi cago numbers 30,000 and they have never had such an institution. Mr. Garibaldi came to the Western metrop olis from Italy in 18G3, a penniless boy, and by his industry and business : sagacity he has become a millionaire. SHARKS Bid AS WHALES, MARINE MONSTERS THAT INHABIT THE INDIAN OCEAN. Some are Seventy Feet lons—So Powerful They Easily Drag Boats Beneath the Water's Surface. SOME years ago, said an ex-Con sul to one of the Indian ocean ports to a reporter of the Philadelphia gTimes, I spent nearly a year on tho Island of Mauri tius, making a study of the natural products of the country for a commer cial firm in London, and, incidentally, of the animals for a society of which I was a member. Among other things I investigated was the fishing, and I soon learned that there was an extraordinary swordfish, known as tho eailfisb, on the coast, which wus sup posed to be very dangerous, and when attacked often turned on the boat and destroyed it. As one of the risks of the country I looked into it und found that there were at least two or three accidents yearly in which no one returned to to tell the story. But I soon made up my mind thnt tho swordfish had nothing to do with it, a fact which I proved in a singular and unexpected way. I hired a boat, or a pirogue, one day, with half a dozen men, to go on n hunt for a sailfisli. I discarded their crude methods and took a regu lar harpoon, with a good stout rope for towing and a keg to throw over, after the fashion of the New England fishermen. Once in the oiling, beyond tho reef that was a garden in its beauty of coral growth, ono of the men pointod away on tho horizon, where he said he saw a saillish. The boat was turned in the direction indicated and soon I observed what appeared to be a beautiful sail. The nearer wo ap proached the more charming it became in its coloring; rich yellows, greens and purples combined to make it a magnificent picture, and I could think only of a mimic and diminutive galley of (fleojiatra, where all the sails were rich in coloring. The fin was so tall and largo that from a little distance it seemed ex actly like the small sail of a vessel, and quivered and scintillated as the fish moved aloDg. The fish paid little or 110 attention to the boat, so that it was an easy matter to run alongside. A few minutes later we had the har poon in it, and it was towing the buoy away over the water, exactly as does the American swordfish. It was ulti mately captured in the same man ner. I then set the sail and we went four or five miles out to sea to a oertain reef to try the fishing. While there the men suddenly became very much excited at the sight of the fin of a large fish coming neur the boat. Some of them wanted ine to strike it, others were vociferous in thoir demand that wo should pull for tho shore, but in my sublime confidence, the rosult of perfect ignorance, I ordered tho anchor iiulled up and we rowed to ward the fish. It pormitted us to tun alongside, as a whale would, and when almost over it the harpoon was thrown. I have had a somewhat extended ex perience with large fishes and have even been behind a seventy-foot whale, but the result of this strike surprised me. Immediately an enor mous tail and body rose into the air, by a miracle missing the boat, the tail coming down with such force that had it struck tho light craft it would have broken it into splinters. The same moment the animal sounded with such impetuosity that the bow of the boat was jerked under water, aud when tholrope broke, as it fortunately did, wo floated half lull of water, which was with difficulty bailed out. One old uativo in the crew said that we had had a fortunate escape, as had the line held we should have been hauled beneath the surface as it fouled. Such a result was very appar ent, and I saw at once tho cause of the mysterious losses. This fish was ho powerful tbnt with comparative ease it could drag a large boat beneath the surface iu case the lines fouled nud were strong enough. Several of the natives told me of inci dents illustrating the remarkable power of the fish, aud some of them had been in boats or canoes that had been jerked beneath the surface and had made their escape by tho breaking of the rope. The fish was undoubtedly the larg est shark in the world, a spotted mar bled monster that weighed almost as much as a large whale and attained a length of seventy or moro feet. It was a singular creature, with mouth not placed beneath the head, as iu the man-eater, and with enormous gill openings. Its teeth were stnall and it had a series of whalebone-like fingers in them, calling to mind the bono shark of American waters. This shark, rhinodon typicus, as it is called by science, is weil known at the Seychelles Islands, whore the pi rogues of the natives are often de stroyed by it. It is often mistaken for a whale and hayiooned, when its light ning-like rushes either carry.the boats beneath the surface or destroy them. Very few specimens of this fish have been examined by white men. There is one specimen in the Colombo Mus eum which is twonty-three feot in length, and which was taken in a net by some Cingalese. Dr. Wright, of the Dublin Univer sity, observed one of these sharks that was fifty feet in length, and had the assurance of competent witnesses that they had been taken seventy or eighty leot in length. One hundred years ago there wore giant sharks near Cape Cod, whore a monster almost as large as the rhinodon was followed with such persistency that the rest almost entirely disappeared, only one now and then being taken. The largest on record was about seventy feet in length, and was taken by fche schooner Virgin. When hauled alongside it was seen to be longer than the schooner, that was of sixty-eight tons burden. The Virgin harpooned another, which was apparently still larger. Such a shark is more active than a whale, and could easily carry a largo boat under water, and to these lisbos may be laid many of the mys terious casualties of the deep sea. WISE WORDS. Great people always have small enemies. To be a lion for a day, would spoil a sheep forever. Habits are the ruts worn in a road habitually traveled. Tho hardest problems to solve are the providences of God. Tho secret of a secret is to know I how und when to tell it. j Grief is an outcast, and no man grasps his hand cordially. Every man is our neighbor, who I needs our compassion and help. The knack of easy travel is in know ing how to keep ready all the time. The man who wears a face like a I coffin, should not complain if he finds no welcome. Tho giar.ts who frighten us most, often turn out to be common-sized men 011 stilts. The man who gets up in this world by putting another man down, loses more than he gains. Teach a boy no higher morality than that honesty is good policy, and he will only be honest when it is policy. The man who falls 011 a banana skin once will have sympathy, but he will only make fun for tho boys the next time ho lauds on his back. There is nobody wo like better than the man who is willing to speak his opinions, except the man who is will ing to keep them to himself. It is doubtful if even angels ever weep any over tho mau who never finds out where the mud is, until he gct9 into it up to his neck.—Ram's Horn. Music iu the Bible. Dr. Cyrus Adler, of the Smithsonian Institution, lectured iu Philadelphia at the Miekve Israel Synagogue, under the auspices of the Miekve Israel Con gregation, on "The Musical Instru ments of the Bible and Their Modern Representatives." The lecture was illustrated with a number of stereop ticon pictures of ancient musical in struments ns shown in statues and oas relief and their prototypes of the present day. The different musical instruments of the Bible were de scribed iu detail by Dr. Adler, under the followiug three classes: Instru ments of percussion, wind instruments and string instruments. The only musical instrument used among the ancient Israelites of which we huve'a contemporary representation is the long trumpet preserved in the arch of Titus in Rome. This resembles the modern "nTeer" of the Moors. The only instrument used in ancient times which is still in use is the "shofor," or ram's horn, blown in the synagogues on the Hebrew New Year Day and the Day of Atonement. Other ancient instruments which have their repre sentations in modern forms are the tabret and or band drum, cymbals, tho flute or pipe, the double ilute, the bagpipe, the harp, tho psaltry or dul cimer. Various instruments not cer tainly identified, mentioned in tho Bible, are evidently instruments in tended to accompany particular Psalms, and these are named accord* ing to tho instruments which wero used in tho accompaniment to their rhythmic rendering. Steel MuhU'ls. The introduction of steel mantels is being largely tavored by Eastern build ers in the construction of dwellings. In these, all the surface below the slab is composed of twenty-gauge wrought steel, pressed into the desired shape or stylo by heavy machinery, the out side surface being enameled to imi tate any kind of wood or marble, the nature of this enameling being such that the material will withstand all changesof temperatnre without injury. Of the advantages pertaining to such mantels, in addition to their economy, prominence is given to that of dimin ished weight, us compared with the slate or marble mantel, which they take the place of, one of the latter weighing, say, some 401) pounds, while one of steel weighs only 100, this also including seventy pounds for the slate slab which is supplied with the metal mantel-pieces. Such mantels hold their shape if the house settles, as there are uo joints to part; they are fireproof, and act as a radiator of the heat instead of absorbing it. What Scurry Is. Though scurvy is popularly sup posed to appear only during long sea voyages it has been known in besieged cities, camps, prisons and even among a destitute rural population. Dr. Joseph Jones, who was a surgeon in the Confederate army, estimated that nine tenths of the great mortality in the prison at Andersonville, Ga., dur ing the Civil War was due directly or indirectly to scurvy. Many causes, such as depressing mental emotion, fatigue, exposure to cold and wet, neglect of ventilation and cleanliness, and insufficient food, undoubtedly con tribute to the production of scurvy. Its essential cause, however, is a defi ciency of some important constituent of food. Always Huugry. The greatest living authority on In dian statistics calculates that from 30,000,000 to 40,000,000 people soarcely ever lose the sensation ot hunger—in fact, do not know the feel ing of a full stomach except in the mango season. THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE, STORIES THAT ARE TOLD BY THE FUNNY MEN OP THE PRESS. A Toast—Assurance—ln a Harbor Shop—An Olienslve Request—A Woman's Reason, Etc. Illustrious Greece! Hero's health to you. Who (lares tho Turk to brave, While (-renter Powers to keep the peace Would leave poor Crete a slave. Let lose the dogs of war, and when The battle's din shall cease, Here's hoping Europe's map will show A larger spot of Greece. —Charles S. Carter. A WOMAN'S REASON. "Why does Mrs. Van Meter hate Mrs. MoMnsters so cordially?" "Somebody told her they looked enough alike to be sisters. "—Chicago Journal. AN OFFENSIVE REQUEST. "What was the nature of the trouble you had with your last nurse girl?" "Sue didn't like it because I asked her to stay at home with the chil dren."—Judge. IN A BARBER SHOP. Barber (putting on finishing touches) —"VVhat'll you have on your head?" Customer—"A littlo more hair, please."—Judge. ASSURANCE. He—"Will you come to my wed ding?" She—"Whom are you going to marry ?" He—"You."—Tit-Bits. CYNICAL. The Happy Man—"l tell yon, old fellow, a man doesn't know what real happiness is until he's married." Cynical Friend—"Then he finds that it consists in being single. Brooklyn Life. A CHRONIC WEAKNESS. Mr. Backpedal (tenderly, to Miss Breaker, as they wheel down the Boulevard)—" Are you tired, Miss Breaker?" Miss Breaker—"No; but my wheel is."—Judge. CONFESSION. Mrs. Talkerly—"So you are going to marry Colouel Laudly, my dear. And C hear you love the ground he walks on?" Miss Sharpleigh—"Yes; it belongs to him."—Tit-Bits. HOW HE FOUND OUT. Convivial—"Doctor, mv wife suf fers greatly from insomnia." Physician "lnsomnia? How do you know?" Con Vivial—"Why, every time I some homo at two or three o'clock in the morning I always find her wide iwake !"—Puck. SAVING TROUBLE. "I guess I'll propose to Henrietta," said the young man, thoughtfully. "I had supposed you admired Ma tilda most." "Oh, I do admire her ever so much. But I've got some poetry addressed to 'Marietta'—a young woman who mar ried last montl, and I'm afraid it would be a good deal of work to go through it and make it rhyme with Matilda."—Washington Star. MATRIMONIAL PROGNOSTICATIONS. "So you wish to leave to get mar ried, Mary ? I hope you have given the matter a serious consideration?" "Oh, I have, sir," was the reply. "I've beon to two fortune-tellerß und a clairvoyant, nnd looked in a sign book, and dreamed on a look of his hair, and been to one of those astero logers, nnd to a meejum, und they all toll me to go ahead, sir. I ain't one to marry reckless like, sir."—House hold Words. FEMININE FINANCE. Mrs. Blookley—"John, do you know that Koyal Worcester vaso I bought yesterday for twenty dollars? Well, they reduced them to ten dollars this morning." Mr. Blockley—"Then yon are ten dollars out by not waiting until this morning." Mrs. Blockley—"No; only five. I went down to-day and bought another one for ten, making two of them averaging fifteen dollars each." — Puck. HE KNEW THE KEV. A young mau leaned up against the counter of u branch telegraphic office where two pretty young ladies are em ployed as telegraphers. Ho had been chatting with them for about an boar, but had forgotten to say that at one period of his life he himself had been an operator. During a lull iu the couversatiou one of the young ladies "onened" her key and said to the other; "What do you think of his nibs at the counter?" "Dcn't think much of him," was the reply. "Why?" "Oh, he makes me tired—he talks like a parrot." "He mokes me tired, too—wish he would sneak." The young man broke in at this juncture and said : "Ladies, I thank you for the compliments you have be stowed upon me, and as you are tired of my company, I'll sneak." The numerous colors of the rain bow would not be sufficient to describe the changes that took place in the young ladies' fnoes. Thero is a moral attached to this tale and young ladies in branch offices and elsewhere would do well to take heed."
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers