QJJEEN NATALIE'S NECK. IU llvanty aid Symmetry Is the Talk of +,*, All Europe. The most beautiful queen of Europe is Natalie of Servia, and her greatest hen uUfJa her neck. The world has just been let into the secret of the method which has largely enabled her to de velop this charming feature. The queen takes frequent and regular exercise with a heavy pitcher on her head. The result of this is to straight en and strengthen the neck and to give It the form which the highest standard of female beauty requires. Not only does the exercise add to present beauty, but it arrests the ravages which time makes more quickly in the female neck than in any other place. Natalie is a woman whose caireer has perhaps been more exciting and pic turesque than that of any living oc cupant of a European throne. Her beauty is of on order that is in keeping with the vigor of her character. Neither amiability nor feminine gentle ness enters into the latter to a notice sble degree. Natalie is now living in the dignity proper to the rank of a queen-dowager, while her husband has a pension, but is not allow ed to enter his own country. He spends his money as soon as he gets it. in drink and riotous living. The rest, of the quarter he Jives by begging, bor rowing. sponging and playing card*. The queen, on the other hand, engages in the much more laudable and wliolo aonie employment of preserving her neck and shoulders. If you could obtain admission to the grounds of tlhe queen's residence near Belgrade, at about eight o'clock in the morning, you would see her majeslv taking a brisk walk, with her pitcher on her shapely head. She is accompanied by a dame d'honueur, who is not herself an expert in the art of pitcher carrying. Queen Natalie has very abundant black hair and a rich coloring. She is a very finely developed woman. Her fig ure is very strong and erect nbd her car riage is perfect, for her favorite exer cise tends to develop the latter quality tis well as to beautify the neck and shoul ders. These are adorable and beyond nil criticism. She bikes care to dref-s in away to show these to the best ad vantage. From chin to bust Queen Natalie's flesh has the firmness of marble; al though, unlike tihat substance, it is full NATALIE AS A WATER CARRIER, of life and blood. Her head is plnoed or her shoulders after the manner of Venus of Miio. There are no protrud ing bones, no wrinkles, no hollows, but. neither is there any superfluous fat ness. The whole is a beautiful poem of form. The exercise to which Natalie owes so much of her charm is one which lias been practiced by women of the poorer classes in many countries, fron\ the earliest ages. Rachel, it may be re membered. met Jacob when she was going to the well with her pitcher. The women of oriental countries, of Greece nnd of Italy huve ulways been accus tomed to carry pitchers nnd other bur dens on their heads. They have little idea of beautifying themselves when they do this, but, nevertheless, they are doing so. The American woman who worries Hbout the. shape of her neck probably never thinks that its defects are due to lack of proper exercise tending to espe cially strengthen this part. She may be able, suggests the New York Jour nal, to profit by the example of the queen of Servia. New Conceit In L'mbrellnii, Jewels in umbrella handles is a new conceit. It is considered extremely up to-date to have precious stones set into your parasol stick or umbrella handle, nnd to cause them to be arranged in all kinds of beautiful designs. When a lady is tired of a ring, all she has to do Is to go to ber jeweler and commission to transfer the stones to t)ie um brella handle. To Msk. I-.c. Yellow. To give cheap white laoe the yellow ish tinge beloved of artists, strep it for t few minutes in weak tea. PLANTS AND FLOWERS. A Plea for the Hollyhock and Other Old- Fashioned Bloseome. There arc fu&hions in flowers as well as elsewhere, and though one muy de spise the mere taking up of certain flowers, because it is "the thing," there is still some satisfaction in finding one's old-time favorites, neglected in these later days, being brought to the front and given the appreciation that they houestly deserve, because what starts in a whim of fashion may end in the genuine love for the old-fasldoued blossoms, und tlieir continued cultiva tion long after "tJbe fashion" lias be stowed its attention upon some other fad. Some of the old-time favorite flowers have come back to popularity, I hope to stay. Among them all tlherc are none capable of giving more real satisfaction than the single hollyhock that used to grow against the garden wall or fence by the eide of grandmoth er's house. The seedsmen have had a era/.e for making single flow ers double, nnd for me, at least, they have very nearly ruined some of the old-time beautiful blossoms. They have doubled the beautiful blossom* of the single hollyhock and made a peony of it, much to my distress. This is a kind of im provement that, hasn't at all improved, nnd it is time to call a halt to this tam pering with our single flowers. Many single blossoms are much more attract ive than they could |K>s*>ihly be doubled, nnd it is a crime against flower lovers to deprive us of the single blooms. Give us the old-time favorites and give them to us unchanged.from tlieir cld-time form and color. Particular ly is this to be insisted on in the case of the old-time single hollyhock, for it* beauty was of a sort to make its dis appearance little short of a calamity. —Orange Judd Farmer. REMOVING STAINS. Several Prescriptions Which Are Certain ly Worth Trying. Varnish or paint stains should first be covered with butter or sweet oil, and thee rubbed with turpentine. If it is an old stuui, the turpentine muy be re placed by chloroform, which must, ol course, be used with great precaution. Fruit stains will generally yield if you rub according to the grain of the mate rial, with a little salt and water. Sher ry will take out. claret stains, If they are rubbed gently. Blood stains should be soaked with petroleum, and then washed in \frarm water. It is said that no stain will resist the following recipe: Put into a large bottle two quarts of clean spring water, add a piece of white amber the size of n walnut, a piece of potash as big as a hazel nut, and two lemons cut into slices. Let it Btand 24 hour*, then strain and keep it in well corked bottles. Damp the stain with t his preparation and rub the place with fresh water directly afterward. Finally, try this prescription for tak ing stains out of silk or cloth: Pound some French chalk until very fine, and mix it with warm water to the thickness of mustard. Put it on the spots, rub it lightly with your finger, or the paJm of your hand, thin put a sheet of blot ting paper or brown paper over the -ipotsand press-firmly with a warm iron. —N, V. Journal. (.'rent) and Stationery. The taste for ores in is increasing, and not content with blazoning it on one's it is now the mode to have if exquisitely hand-painted on parchment, framed and hung in ii conspicuous place iu hall or library. For mourning sta tionery. dead white linen with n narrow black border is the correct style. The very wide black larder, wldcli w as sup posed to gauge the depth of the writ er's grief, is quite outof date. For sec ond mourning, pure white paper, with a \ery narrow border of pale gray or vio let, is sometimes used, with monogram or address (lie in color to match. Dainties for Feathered Pet*. Canary birds enjoy a change of food occasionally as well as persons do. Hani boiled egg chopped fine, mixed with cracker crumbs and a speck of cayenne pepper, is very good to feed to these pets once in awhile, givingthem a small amount at one time. They will reward with their Bweeteat songs. For Ink-Stained Finger*. When puinfCe stone and lemon are un available wet the ends of sulphur matches and rub ink-stained finger* well with them. The spots will soon ! disappear. ..... LITERARY FOLK. W. H. Mallock, the writer, is to e<l it a new London weekly, to be modeled •fteT the Spectator and to be sold one half cheeper. Ruskin's favorite recreation i cheat) and he devotee his evening* to it. Chess Is also a favorite game with George Meredith. A statue of Sainte-Beuve is to be erected in Paris. The project was started by physicians. It is not gen erally known tihat before he became a critic Sainte-Beuve was a student of medicine. A volume of travels recording the Impressions of the czar while travel ing through Egypt and India, but writ ten by his private secretary, has been published in London. Hundreds of il lustrations are scattered through the volume. Mauriee Maeterlinck, tiie Belgian poet and dramatist, lives in the quiet old town of Ghent and enjoys wheel ing over the smooth, flat roads. He is a barrister by profession, but does not practice, saying he cannot manage the affairs of other people when he Amis it so impossible to mnnage his own. It ia to Mrs. Thomas Hardy that the world owes her husband's novels. It was she who induced him to give tip architecture for writing. She copied out his first novel herself and sent, it to the publishers and she makes it a point to keep posted on the literature of the day, so as to aid her busy husband. Bjornstjerne BjorusdQ is about to leave Norway aivJ take up his per manent residence in Germany. He states that the continued attacks upon him at home are the reason for this change and he says he will find a more congenial field in Germany, where he will find fewer opportunities to tnke port in politics. He is now at Copen hagen, but will make Italy hi* winter headquarters. ITEMS OF INTEREST. A cigar store in New Orleans, owned by a colored man, does a big trade in the Bale of feet belonging to "graveyard rabbits." Mohave county, A. T., is infested with millions of army worms. The Wal la pal Indians make soup of them, and find them very fattening. A fortune of $2,000,000 has just dropped to Richard Pilkey, a young man of 26, who for some years had been employed as a luborer on the Erie canal. The Mosque of St. Sophia, at Con stantinople, was built over a thousand years ago, and the mortar used was per fumed with musk. The musky odor is still perceptible. It is asserted by Lyell, the geologist, that at a period comparatively recent nil that portion of the United States south of the Black hills w as under from 600 to 900 feet of water. In the British museum there is a queer and ancient love letter, engraved on a brick. It is a proposal for the hand of an Egyptian princess, and is about 3,500 years old. A funny election bet wsb settled by a gentleman in Philadelphia, in view of n large number of amused spectators. With a crowbar he pushed a peanut four times around the city hall. Love entered the hearts of a couple of inmates of the poorhousc In Delaware county, Ind., and they eloped. The groom ia a cripple, aged 00, and the bride is an apoplectic woman of 27. A wild boar roasted whole was the chief dish at a state dinner recently given by the prince of Montenegro. It was brought in smoking hot. Inside the boar was a turkey and inside the turkey was a snipe which had been shot by the host. CHIT-CHAT OF FASHION. If the sumuier hat is to be retrimmcd for another season altogether the best plan to pursue before putting it away is to remove all the trimming from it. The glovea that enjoy the highest favor luave only one button apiccc in these days, and even this makes them almost too long for tlhe alcoves that must fall to the knuckles. Diamonds should be worn by the bril liant woman, but the quiet one should choose pearls. The beauty of a bru nette is enhanced by ruble* and topazes, and of a fair-skinned woman by em eralds. Evening gowns with square-cut necks are inuoh worn this season. The square neck is more becoming to sloping shoul ders than the round neck, and lace and chiffon ruffles can be used to give the edges a soft und daiivty finish. A pretty evening waist of chiffon in ]K>le blue, rose, lemon, cream, lilac or Nile green has the neck cut square und edged with fur. It seems on in congruous combination the dainty, tnistiike material trimmed with win ter's richest fur—but the effect is very }charming. Cbinqhilla, sable, ermine and seal are the best furs for trimming chiffon, being the softest and richest looking. * THE BEGINNING OF NATIONS. The Sardinians are descended from the Phoenicians, Greeks, Carthaginians, Romans, Vandals, Saracens, Genoese, I'isans, Arganese and Spaniards, who, at one time or another, inimbi ted the island. The unspeakable Turk is descended from a race of thieves and murderers, who first appeared in history in the tenth century. They came from the steppes of Central Asia and were of Tartar origin. The Spaniards were originally called llLspanlons. There is a tradition among the Spaniards that they are the descendants of Tubal, fifth son of Jnphet. The Romans conquered the country In 206 B. C. The inhabitants of Portugal are de scendants of the Alains and the Visi goths who settled In that country in the fourth century. The name Portuguese is derived from the original appellation ojt Opofto. . BE YOUR OWN DOCTOR. tasllj Applied Remedies for a Number ef Minor Ailment*. Don't send for a doctor whenever you leel badly or your heart isn't right or fou have a cold. There are many sim ple and direct remedies which you can I aste in your hat and apply on occasion, dive Nature a chance and help her all lou can. Thus, for instance, both Bneezingand ;oughing can be arrested by pressing Irmly on the upper lip or in front of the ear. Boxing the ears of a person suffer ng from hay fever is said to be a sov 'reign remedy for that inconvenient i 'aludy. That severe attacks of rheu ixatism are greatly relieved by bee r tings has been noted, and in Malta and in Russia, where bees abound, they are In such repute as a cure that resort lo this primitive kind of inoculation las been a common practice for genera dons, with most satisfactory results. Excessive palpitation of the heart can alwaj's be arrested by bending double, aead downward, and hands hanging. If breathing is temporarily suspended while in this position, the effect is all the more rapid. Hiccough can aimost always be stopped by this simple ac tion, which is more readily available than the often recommended fright or sudden start which on© cannot easily get up for one's self on the spur of the moment. The distressing cramping of the fin gers from constant use of a pen, which may in time develop into writers' .'ramp, can always be prevented by en larging the holder either by wrapping string around i$ or by running the Handle of the pen through a bit of rub ber tubing. The innumerable hosts of new and infallible cures for colds would easily fill a good-sized volume, and still they come. One quite too simple way of nip ping A cold in the bud i 6 to sit down in front of a good fire and warm your buck thoroughly, for th© back is the place where cold is usually caught, be ing careful, of course, not to go at once Into a cold room. A French physician goes to extremes by applying a piece of ioe at tJie spine. Indeed, nowadays the curative value of cold is being high ly spoken of, and the inflammatory sore throat, which used to be treated by poultices and warmth, is now said to be easily and quickly cured by suclcing ice and keeping the patient in n low tem perature. Ice at the neck is also a powerful curative for asthma. In fact, It is even predicted thwt-the dry, cold, clear air of the arctic, keen and free from germs, will, before long, be rec ommended for ailments springing from weak chests.—N. Y. Journal. EMBROIDERY NOVELTY. J*wel Work, Which Is Roth Effective and Simple, the Latest Pad. Th© last new thing in embroidery is known ns jewel work from the fact that it Is supposed to represent jewels scattered here and there. While un doubtedly considerable imagination must be called iuto play before ame thyst*, rubies, turquoise* and the like can be discovered in the rounds ami ovals called by their names, it is effec tive, and it is novel. Just at the present moment garnets are in highest favor. The design given is a simple one. All JEWELED DOILY, its color is confined to the gems, which are indicated by ovals and circles. The moAil from which the drawing was made is designed Xpr use with dainty blue and whit© china, and nile tur quoises are used, but it might easily be varied to suit any scheme of color. The bdge is buttonholed with whit© floss. All the design is worked with white ex cepting only the turquoises, which are t uffed and worked in French over and over stitch with blue floss as near to the color of the real jewel its possi ble. Th© effect is delightful, and the dolly hurnioni/.es to perfection with the dinner service for which it was made. The use of a single Jewel, such as the turquoise, lias the advantage of simplicity, and work so done requires leas knbwledge of harmony than does a combination. Two or more gems can b© used, however, to give a rich and elegant result. Often the design proper is executed in color, but white us a foundation is safest and ©an be trusted to set forth the jewels at their best. An ambitious piece of work shows the topaz and amethyst combined and is really very effective. The colors l>e !ng brilliant and decided it can only be used with judgment, but as a resting place for a cut glass bowl of maidenhair ferns it is decorative in the extreme.— Chicago Chronicle. A Bridesmaid In Ureen. A bridemaid's dress seen recently was of pale-green silk made with full skirt, relieved only by a twist of mous seline de soie around the foot Th© waist w as n round one of the green ailk, entirely veiled with green mousselin© de soie. This gave a very 'fairylike look to the dreas. A long silken sash of green was wound around the waist and tied at the side with small loops and long ends. The throat, which was cut square, was finished with n twist of the same ailk. The sleeve puffs were of green silk and were quite full. They were put on to look like small balloons or the mythical wings of a goddess. The floating ends of the sash, the sleeve puffk and the lightness of the inous seliue de soie gave this dress a partic ularly niry appearance. SHORT MISCELLANY. Tho cultivation of sugar beets has proved BO profitable this year on Grand Island, Neb., that farmers hove sold their crops for sums double the value of the land on which they were grown. It is said by philologists that there nro 13 original languages, the Greek, Latin, German, Slavonic, Welsh, JJis cayan, Irish, Albanian, Tartarian, Illy rian, Jazygian, Chaucin and Finnic. The eyesight of a San Francisco cat became defective, and the owner, Miss Thompson, induced an oculist of that city to make a pair of spectacles for the animal. Now the cat can see as well as ever with their aid. The problem of cheap living has been solved by Jtev. Mile* Grant, of Boston. His daily diet is graham bread, milk, cheese and vegetables, and he contin ues to maintain good health at a coet of 87 cents a week. Stout canes in large numbers have for some time been conveyed across the Prussian border into Russia. The czar's officials at last examined the canes, and found t/hem stuffed with nihilistic lit erature, printed on tissue pa per. Columbia college is to have a gym nasium which will cost $500,000. There will be a running track one-ninth of a mile in circumference and 112 feet wide. The main room will measure 33 feci high, 100 feet wide and IGO feet in length. An uncommon accident befell the lit tle daughter of Washington McKinny, of Sparta, O. She was coming from school, holding a pencil in her hand, when she stumbled and fell. Tine pencil penetrated her chest, touched the heart and caused death. While crossing a field in York, Pa., where there were several large iron pipes, John Berkery was pursued by a vicious bull. To escape the animal, lie crawled into on© of the pipes, and lay tliere until the bull tired himself test ing his horns against the stout iron. Throughout the entire world there are about 20,000,000 square miles of un explored territory. In Africa there are C,500,000 square miles; Arctic regions, 3,600,000; Antarctic regions, 5,300,000; America, 2,000,000; Australia, 2,000,000; Asia, 200,000, and various islands, 900,- 000. FOREIGN GOSSIP. Prino© Louis Lucien Bonaparte's great philological library has been sold to a London bookseller, as tjhc efforts tx> raise money enough to buy it for the Guildhall library were unsuccess fuL Helslngfors university in Sweden ha.* this year 2,101 students, of whom 261 are women; 79 of these are under tin; mathematical, 117 under the philosoph ical and 57 under the medical faculties. Fraaiclsque Sorcey, the Paris dramat ic oritic, has won his suit against Le Petit Journal for summarily dismiss ing him, obtaining SBO danniges. The dismissal was due tothis using very col loquial language in explaining the meaning of "Kip-Kif bourrioot," which has lately sprung up in Paris. Schoeutag, the heud of the claque ai the Vienna opera houHC, where Hans Kicliter is conductor, recently profited by a benefit performance on the occa sion of his completing 25 years of serv ice. He is the inventor of the bravo a catena, a chain of bravo* starting in one corner and taken up in different parts of the house. A heat lien burying ground, with giant skeletons, was recently dug up at Mitteradorf, in the Austrian Sulzkam- ; mergut. Many of the bodies were six I foot seven inches tall; they were all j buried with the feet to the east, each inclosed in a circle of stones, with a stone under the head. Large earrings and finger rings were found on thorn, and one skeleton held a knife itn its hand. No signs of Christian burin' were discovered. FOREIGN PICKINGS. Copenhugeu is to have an elevated railnxid running along the shore from the city to the woods atCharlottenlund. The motive power will !>e electricity or compressed air. At Dolhain, on the Belgian frontier toward Germany, the whole population went to the railroad station recently to hoot the oouut of Flanders, with his | son, Prince Albert, and his son-in-law, the duke of Vendome, because the j count had employed Germans on hit es- | tate near by. Sweden will send un expedition to lvonig Karl's Land, eustof Spitsbergen, next summer, which will also explore the other islands and the undiscovered region between Spitsbergen and Franz Josef Land. Last year's rush to Spitz bergen shows that the difficulties of such an expedition ure little more than i those of a summer cruise. An extraordinary story of the cred ulity of Russian peasants comes from Slavyansk, in southern Russia, where a woman whose little ten-year-old girl had sore eyes consulted with a witoli doctor and w as told to apply gunpowder to the child's eyes and touch it off with a match. She obeyed, blinding the child and Injuring herself. •• MEN OF LETTERS. Some one asked Max Nordeau to de flue the difference between genius and insanity. "Well," said the author of "Degeneration," "the lunatic is, at least, sure of his board and clothes." One hundred and fifty copies of the new Thistle edition of J. M. Bar lie's works were printed on Japan paper, find every copy had been subscribed for before a single volume was ready for de livery. Paul Bourget has been in Ireland, in the neighborhood of the Lake of Kil lnrney, nearly all the past summer, malt ing notes for a short novel or novelette which he is now writing, the scene of which is laid in the distrct mentioned. The story will tell of a French family which, having to lice from France for .political reasons, settled in that ro mantic spot. PARQUETRY FLOORS. rij AM MOM Effectend Dnmbie Than Carpets or Hugs. When the mistress of the household s likewise the maid, she will find her abors greatly lessened when the lioors are left bare or else covered with plain .natting, for both can be dusted daily ♦vith a cloth-covered broom, whereas carpets require a weekly sweeping at •east, and that must be a thorough one. Even a pine floor can be made to look fairly well by stopping up the cracks, rrevices and knotholes with putty and training and varnishing it. Hard wood PARQUETRY FLOOR AND BORDER ING. Iloors will look exceedingly well if they receive a thorough polishing from a cabinet-maker twice a year and the rest of the time are wiped with a soft cloth. The most beautiful of all floors is the •wood mosaic. This, as its name im plies, consists of a number of small pieces of wood stood on end. Tlie.v are joined by a strip of lead which holds each block in place. Sometimes the wood is all of one kind, but set with the grain running different ways. Other designs consist of two or more con trasting woods, laid so as to form pat terns of the most elaborate description. SOME FANCY BORDERS. The flooring is more effective than any carpet or rug and can be readily kept in a high state ol' polish. Parquetry is of two kinds, solid and veneered. The former is made of sep arate pieces of thick wood joined by tongue and groove, the latter of thin strips or blocks of wood glued on a paneled backing of hard wood. From this it will be seen that all fancy wood floorsneeda foundation floor of cheaper wood, and that this necessarily makes their use slightly expensive, although in the long run they more than repay one for the original expense. To be gin with, they are handsome enough to require little if any covering in the way of rugs, then the two floorings deaden sound to a great degree, and, lastly, they are so exquisitely clean and artis tic in appearance that one. cannot help but be converted to their use. A complete flooring is illustrated, us are some borders. It consists of o combination of oak and muhognny, with a border of oak, mahogany unfl maple. The border is an intricate and effective Grecian pattern, in which the different woods are used to shade with the delicacy of a puinting. This floor ing can be luid to fit. any room. Par quetry should never be. cleaned with warm water, for it will cause the pieces of wood to warp and separate and will also affect the polish.—Chicago Chron icle. CHILDREN AND FLOWERS. Why the Keeping of m Small Garden Is a Preelone Bit of Training. It is a sad reflection to me to see how many children there are who have nc real love of flowers. They may be at tracted by pretty and fragrant blos soms, all children are that, but aa for cultivating and giving the tender care that plant* require, and thus learning some of the sweetest lessons in life, they know nothing, and all about them are acres of untitled 6oil. The keeping of a bit of garden, if only a few feet of eartlv, nay, if only a few pots in n sunny window, is a valuable bit of training, and cannot fail to inspire n love of the beautiful that will have an important influence on the charac ter throughout life. It should be remembered that exam ple is the first element to be considered in educating the childish mind. Do not try and force a child lo keep a bit of garden, but keep one yourself. Sow seeds and plant slips, and spend spare moments caring for them, and water night and morning, and always have your child with you; be talkative and wax enthusiastic, never mind whether you are understood or not, it will not be long before the child will imitate you, and wont a garden of its own, and hm this is brought about, you may rest assured you have sown a seed in the childish heart that will grow to a bloocoming of great beauty. N. Y. Weekly. Flowers in I'anch llowls. Handsome punch bowls arc being utilised for flowers to ornament the cen ter of large circular dinner tables. Frames are mode of a network of silver wire, fitting over the top of the bowl and holding the flowers in place. A single wire is fastened to the opposite sides to form a handle. Broad ribbon of the color of the flowers is put under the bowl and brought up so as to cover ♦ lie wlr4 handles, and is finished at the top with a large bow. GRAVEL CURED Says John J. Neill, 3560 Turner Street, PHILADELPHIA, PENN'A. A healthier, heartier, happier man than John J. Neill, of 3500 Furner street, Philadelphia, could not be found in a day's search. The fact that he is still | alive is a constant wonder to his friends. In the fall of 188'J lie began to suffer Indescribable miseries from stone in the bladder. Consulting an eminent physi cian in Philadelphia, he was told that a surgical operation was necessary. So much did he dread the result, for if un successful it meant death, that he put off the evil day as long as possible. While in this frame of mind, he heard of DR. DAVID KENNEDY'S FAVORITE REMEDY Although disheartened, on July 1, 1803, he bought a bottle of it, and with in a month had experienced boneficial re sults, and before he had finished the third bottle, the gravel was completely dissolved and his sufferings at an end. Mr. Neill feels that he owes a lasting debt of gratitude to I)r. Kennedy's Favorite Remedy and for disorders of bladder and urinary organs, says "it will effect a cure if one be possible." Favorite Remedy is prescribed with unfailing success for rheumatism, dys pep- ia and nerve troubles in which it has cured many that were considered beyond the aid of medicine. All druggists, 81. A Warning. "William, dear," exciai/med a Wash ington woman, whose husband is prone to oversleep himself; "it's time to get up." Thta only response was a yawn. "William, dear; you'll have to get up, if you doai't want to be late in getting down town." "Yea." She left hi in a little while, and com ing back, found that he had relapsed into slumber again. Shaking him, she said: "William!" "Whait ia it?" "If you don't ge<t up this minuto. fou'll be so rushed getting away that you won't have time to find fault with the breakfast."—Washington Star. , A Reflection on Her Age. , "That prim Miss Passay is mad enough to bite me." "What's the matter?" i "Why, she has juat joined the new society that believes that human im pressions are mainly derived through the aonse of smell." "Well?" "Well, I suggested that she was a. scentenarian."—Cleveland Plain Dealer, A Pertinent Query. Deacon Johnson—Do yo' fink yo' kood support mali daughter ef yo' married her? Jim Jackson—Sutitingly. Deacon Johnson—Hab yo' ebber seen her eat? Jim Jackson—Suttingly. Deacon Johnson—Hub yo* ebber seen her eat when nobody was watchin' her? N. Y. Tribune. A Fortune In It. Her face Is not her fortune. Though fair Indeed to see; Hather the fortune of her Complexion's patentee. —Town Topics. THE BIUHWAT3IAN OF 1897. Footpad (armed with X ray lantern) -—Besides your watch you have $213.17. Out with it, or I'll shoot.—Fliegendc Blaetter. The Social Season* Balls and routs— How we miss 'em! Thin dress suits- Rheumatism. —Cleveland Plain Dealer. Wise in His Day. Pat—For th' love of Ilivln, Moike, ph.wait afcr ye boriu' a hole in ycr boat fer? m Mike—Regobl There's one hole in it now t.hot lets th' wather in, an' Oi'xn gain' to put another wan in t' let it out I —Tit-Bits. His Ignorance Accounted For. "I can't understand \vhy Squallop wears that ugly beard on his chin." "Have you ever seen Squallop's chin?" "No." "Well, that'B why you can't under stand."—Chicago Tribune. After a Day's Notice. "Waiter, you remember the order f gave you yesterday ?" "Yes, sir; will you have the same fco-l day?" "Yes, Jt ought to be ready by thls ! time."—N. Y. World. No Cause for Alarm. Mrs. Sniffles—Henry, I think I hee* mice gnawing at the dining-room door. Sniffles—Don't be alarmed, dear; it's only the cook writing a letter to he* lover.—N. Y. Truth. Understood Him Thoroughly* i lie —I love you. Slio—And all along I have thought that my uncle's leaving me his money was a secret—Town Topics. Children Cry for Pitcher's Castoria. Read - the - Tribune.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers