South \in*rtoa has the greatest un- ' broken extent of level surface of any . country in the world. There are 40,000 blind persons in France, nearly half of them from what is now known to bo preventible. Great indignation is expressed in Paris bccauso for two years mining problems that cannot bo solved have been set for the examination of the Eculo Folytechnique through tho blundering of the examiners. A writer in the St. James Gazette attributes the "anxious look and un wholesomo pallor," the nervous ex haustion and headache, often observed among bicyclists, to tho incessant, though unconscious, strain upon tho brain and nervous system due to tho constant effort necessary to maintain equilibrium. Americans who go to Italy to bo educated in music have a great advan tage—if they master the Italian lan guage ami study its melodies. Other wise they have none, maintains tho New York World. The whole secret of tho musical nature of the Italian people lies in tho musical nature of tho Italian language. No one can speak it habitually without becoming unconsciously educated in ihe laws of melody which underlie all music, The Beyrouth, Germany,newspapers record n now sample of meanness. An inhabitant of that city wph afflicted with cataract ill both eyes. He con tracted with a skilled physician to have two operations performed—one on each eye—for $250. Tho first operation proved very successful, but when the doctor offered to operate also on the other eye tii : patient refused, declaring that he could sec as much no ho wanted to see with tlie one eye, an I tendered half of tho amouut stipulated—i. e., $125. The physician, however, saysih.it lie fixed tho price as low as he did in considera tion of the quantity of payment to be received, not in consideration of the quantity of work to be done, and tho unique dispute is now before tho courts awaiting a Solomonic settle ment. Judge Milicn of the law division of tho Post-office Department lias ren dered a decision concerning tho de livery of mail matter bv jail officials to convicts; and the same ruling will apply to inmates of charitable insti tutions. Ho holds that "statu and county institution for the confine ment and punishment of parties con victed of crimes have the right to pre scribe rules and regulations as to communications from outside parties to convicts. While they have no right without the consent of tho convicts, to open the letters addressed to thorn yet they have tlie power to rufuso to deliver or permit to be delivered to tbo convicts any letters addressed to them, unless they will consent that the letters be opened ia the j rosenco of some officer. Where mail is ad dressed to a convict, it is prop r to deliver the same to the officer in charge of tho prison, AYhilo this would not authorizo the olli • r to open such letters, he would have the power, if tho state and county laws or regulations of tho prison so author ized, to refuse to deliver such letters to the convict during liis imprison, incut unless lie consents that limy be opened in the presence of tho olli" r." General John Gibbon has written an article on "Cm West Point Be Made More Useful?" which commands more than usual attention among of ficers of the Army, lie cii -s that in some respects the Military Academy remains the same as it was iifrv wars ago; that, although thj coarse of studies lias undergone radical change, tho number of professors and instruct ors increased, the scientific apparatus improved, and tho number of cadets increased with tho growth of tho country, vet the qualification required by law, with some few additions, re main about tho same. General Gib bons makes special objection to tii ; rule that a candidate of a certain age and height should weigh at least a certain number of pounds. lie main tains that this objection may bo over come in n few mouths with good ra tions and exercise, but that if adhered to strictly a Grant, a Sheridan, even a Napoleon would bo fihut out. Tie also says that there is a hurtful pre judice against the Military Academy among tho people at large, because of its supposed aristocratic character. He maintains that tho academy can bo made more useful by extending its education in such away as to leaven the military clement in the country; aud that, in c.iso of war, tho force would be in a bettor state of prepara tion to take tho field than they have ever been before. SAM JONES AT HOME. WAS ONCE A LAWYER BUT BE CAME A DRUNKARD, He Afterward Developed Into a Suc cessful Evangelist— Is n Lover of Anittiuls and Helper for the Poor- Gifts as Liberal as Speech, Lives in Cartcrsville, Ga. *" One of the most noted evangelists of the country is Rev. Sam 1\ Jones, I whose home Is at Cartcrsville, Ga. I Here, when tired out with his public labors, lie joins his family to rceuper j ate. He goes about Cartcrsville in the slouch hat and plain traveling suit worn on the road, and usually carries a cigar or meerschaum pipe between his lips. He is a great smoker and uses half a dozen cigars every day, besides occasional pulls at the meer schaum. His nervous energy and rest less spirit allow him no idleness, and when there is nothing else to do lie walks vigorously up and down the ve randa or about the yard. His reading is eonlined mainly to the newspapers, ilk $ v REV. SAM P. JONES. and lie is a close student of current events all over the world. lie does not pretend to have a library, and if he did, it is doubtful whether he would ever enter it. Books are too long and tedious for him. • ; He lias made some good Investments and looks well after his property, lie owns two excellent farms, a grist mill, : and some valuable real estate in Car tcrsville. lie has for several years been a director in one of the Cartcrs ville banks, in which lie is a stock holder. The amount of Mr. Jones' charities is enormous, lie gives away every year vastly more than is spent on his family. In addition to his public ehari- ! ties, such as gifts to churches, schools, j and other institutions, requests come to him daily for help from individuals in every section of the United States. Kvery mail brings letters asking for money or help in obtaining positions, or donations for various societies. When it is known that Mr. Jones is at home, his yard is invaded by people seeking help. Poor people walk from distant places in the country to ask for a loan of money or help in obtain ing work. Old negro "uncles" ask for "a few bushels o' co'n to make a crap on." or want indorsements to enable tliem to buy a mule, and numerous black "mammies" vociferously petition "Marae Sam" to give them a cow that tliey may keep "all des heah little black pickaninnies frum a starvin' to (let'." To all these applications Air. Jones gives careful consideration, and no deserving individual is ever sent away empty-handed. He seems to learn by intuition who are the really 1 deserving, and often his gifts are placed where no request has been made The people of Cartcrsville love to t.'ll of how Sam Jones goes down and buys dray loads of provisions and , sends ihem to old and helpless people, j who are usually left to guess the iden- \ tity of their benefactor. It is in works of this kind lhat the evangelist liuds a deeper satisfaction than in his most successful efforts in the pulpit and on tiie platform. A Lawyer and Drunkard, Porter Jones was born in Chambers County, Ala., in 1817. While still a child his father removed to Car tcrsville after the death of his wife, and Carlersville has since been the home of the Jones family. During the war, when Sherman's forces began to pour into North Georgia, young Jones made his way to Henry county. Ky. While there he met Miss Laura AloEl wain, who, in 18(H), became his wife, Tones being then a practicing lawyer in t 'ai tersville. Unfortunately, during his boyhood he had acquired a taste for strong drink, which grew upon Idm until lie was forced to abandon tho law after less than a year's practice, and 'or three years he led the most wretched existence, lie was driven to want and engaged in various kinds of common labor to obtain a living. He plowed, drove a dray and worked in the Iron i dues near Carlersville. This was the in t gloomy period of his life. He had a family coming on to educate and care f"r. and to tlu-so were added the anxie ties caused by ruined health and an empty purse. At this time his father, i whom lie had always been devoted, died, and his death in August, 1872, marks tho turning point in his son's life. His conversion was as complete as it was sudden, and since then he has ad hered to the cause of religion. His first sermon was preached at Felton's chap el. a few miles from Cartcrsville, during the absence? of the regular preacher and was a success. The ore hauling was abandoned and Mr. Jones at once de voted himself to the work of 1 lie gospel. He preached at the country churches and was soon admitted to the confer ence. Ho was assigned to a rural cir cuit in Polk County, but he went, to work with a will and soon liis churches were all prosperous. From this he? went to other obscure circuits and the follow ing ten years were devoted to the rout ine work of the rural Methodist, circuit rider, and it was not until the great revival at Memphis In 1883 that the public hail even as much as heard the name of Sam Jones. Ho lias ipiite an Interesting family of two sous and four daughters, of whom the two eldest daughters are married. UNIQUE TRIP ON STILTS. Two Youns Men to Go Around ttic World in that Manner. Some of these days somebody will probably try to walk on Ills head around the world in an effort to eclipse pre vious attempts of "globe trotters." 11l these days of steam circumnavigating the globe is a thing of everyday occur* TIIEOPIIILB C I*XV. rt'iu'i'. Tho recent feat of the two liion who walked from Buenos Ay its to < Mi! oago has inspired two young men of Chicago with a desire to eclipse that undertaking. They propose to walk around the world on stilts. For sev eral weeks past one of them lias been conspicuous on State street, as lie 1 JP --• RORERT 11. THOMPSON. strode along on stilts, dressed as "Un cle Sum." His right name is Robert it. Thompson, and ho comes from New York State. His companion's name is Theophile Cuny. The young men ex pect to complete their tour and return to Chicago in about three years. Tho New Navy of tho United States. Rattle ships. lowa, 11,000 tons; Mas sachusetts, 10,200 tons; Oregon, 10,200 tons; Indiana, 10,200 tons. Armored battle ship. Texas, 0,300 tons. Armored cruisers. Brooklyn, 0,100 tons; New York, 8,150 tons; Maine, 0,048 toils. Const defense monitors. Puritan, 0.000 tons; Monterey. 4,138 tons; Mian tonoinoh. 3,000 tons; Terror, 3.000 lons. Protected cruisers. Columbia, 7,350 tons; Minneapolis, 7,350 tons; OJymphi, 5,500 tons; Baltimore, 4,000 tons; Charleston, 4,0-10 tons; Cincinnati, 3,153 Ions; Raleigh, 3,183 tons. Partially protected cruisers. Chica go, 4,5(M) tons; Philadelphia, 4,324 tons; Newark. 4.083 tons; San Francisco, 4.U53 tons; Atlanta, 3,150 tons; Boston, 3,180 tons; Detroit, 2,000 tons; Mont gomery, 2,000 tons; Marblehead, 2,000 tons. Gunboats. Yorktown, 1,700 tons; Con cord, 1,700 tons; Bennington. 1,700 tons; Castine, 1.050 tons; Machias, 3,0,30 tons; Petrel, SOo tons. Dynamite cruiser. Vesuvius, 030 tons. Torpedo boats. Alarm. 800 tons; JOrics son, 120 tons; Cnshing, 110 tons; Stilet to, 15 tons. llarbor defense ram. Knlnhdin, 2,183 lons. Practice cruiser for naval cadets. Ban croft, 838 tons. Dispatch boat. Dolphin, 1,485 tons. Colonel Joseph Mulhatton stems to lie spending his vacation in New York. The Chicago Tribune tho other day con tained one of the colonel's gems which deserves to be embalmed In journal istic history. His "special dispatch" gives an account of the wonderful work done by a pet lion which recently ( hew ed up a burglar, and concludes by say ing that the "noble beast" saved the life of an old egg peddler who had been at tacked by a savage mastiff. Here is the picture: "Suddenly the sympathy of the gallant lion was aroused. It had seen the one-side ; battle. It sprang over the gate and made a hold attack on tho mastiff until tho dog ran down the street yelping with pain. The small boys cl tin bed up trees and crept into drain pipes in their terror. When the dog was gone the lion stood up on its hind legs, lashed its tail, and roared with elation. The old egg man held out his hand and the wild beast licked it. It turned out that the peddler once gave the lion an egg, and the creature out of gratitude saved his life to day. The old man said he v.as sure if the lion had not Interfered lie would have been a dead peddler." This c?itainl.V is lyin' extr :ordinary. HER HOME IS RUINED. PATHETIC CONDITION OF FLEM ING SARVER'S WIDOW. She Tells the Story of Her Quiet Life in Her Huttthle Home—She find Her Hiiahand, She Says, Lived There Two Years and Loved the Place, Houiclcrs and Hopeless, The little home of Fleming Sarvcr and wife, who were poisoned July 0 by their foster-daughter, Dollio, is located in the southeast corner of Jackson County, Intl., some twelve miles from the town of Seymour. Ir is a small, weather stained cabin, set away back in tho holds, among tho rose bushes and scrub by fruit trees, half a mile from the main traveled road, and flanked on two sides by heavy timber. To reach the place after leaving tho highway it is necessary to drive first through a woods pasture, then a wheat field. Once there the visitor always found a hearty wel come. They were simple, plain, hard-work ing country folks, well liked by their neighbors, says tho Chicago Tribune, but only moderately prosperous. Three days after her husband had been bur i !, ! mwrn 1 1 ! 1/ RuMi' 1 I ijj: it | V 1 ' 'ftl :< ' if. I ];,'/, 1 1 J M ; j t! _ • J\ j . ,J'. > - 31RS. FLEMING SALVER. led Mrs. Sarvcr. rather a largo, swarthy woman, looked out over the Holds and with tears in her eyes said sin* sup posed somebody else would take the place and come there to live. It had been theirs only two years, still in that short time they had become greatly at tached to it. But as she was born and raised in the immediate vicinity Mrs. Sarver declared there was no far away place to which she had any desire of going. One child was born to them. It died in infancy. They felt lonely, so when John Belknap started out to linda homo for his orphan girl Mr. and Mrs. Sar vcr at once offered to take her. She had been christened Yola Belknap. "Because of her size," said Mrs. Sar vcr, "we always called her Dollio. Jhe was about 5 years old when we got her, and she lived with lis nearly eight years." At school Dollie got acquainted with Josie and Dottle Derringer, girls ol nearly her age and size, daughters ol poor parents with a large family. They were coinpcjhvl to live away frotu home is domestics, working for their board and clothes. They three became chums, and in time got to speculating upon D6l lie's prospects of one day owning tho Sarver farm. In fact, ir was the talk among them that Mr. Sarver bad said to her if she would be a good girl ami work for them, when he and Mrs. Sar ver came to die she should have all their property. So, according to the story told by Dol lie, Josie Derringer conceived the idea that it would be a good thing for her to make sure of the inheritance by do ing something that would hasten the old people into having a will drawn up. "What if they should die suddenly," she argued, "and without leaving a will, you have never been adopted and would be left without anything'/" Then the scheme, says Dollie, of put ting poison in their coffee was hit upon and she declared repeatedly that Josie ' THE SARVER HOMESTEAD, urged her to do it a long time before she Anally consented. When Mrs. Sarver expressed a lack of ability to under stand how Dollie could be so wicked as to enter into such a sinful plot and ven ture upon such a bold undertaking she cried like a child. "She has always been obedient and was good to us. She is a pretty girl and we thought everything of her," she said. Among the inducements held out to Dollio by Josie Derringer, so she relates, was marriage with young Bobbins, a new house by the road side, and a bug gy to ride around in. Sue could then get nway from the old cabin and live stylishly. Sally—-An' after we arc married, will you keep on lovin' me? Hubc — I'll love you till—till tho cows come home, ns the feller says. Sally—-'Y-a-n-s, an' then go down to the grocery an' let me do all the milkin'. Bellefleld I understand that Mrs. Spitlins claims to be a self-made wom an. Bloomfleld—lt isn't quite true. My 1 wife has seen her add the finishing touch-put on her complexion. " FERTILIZER FOR FEAR ORCHARDS. Aii experienced ponr grower recom mends the use of 400 pounds of muri ate of potasli with 800 pounds of ground bone per acre each year. One half of this mixture ho applies to the orchard in the autumn and the other half in the spring, when plowing. The necessary nitrogen is supplied by sowing crimson clover with the fertil izer—New York World. TAGGING TIIE SHEET. Tagging the sheep is a necessary thing to bo done if the shepherd would avoid the injurious lJy. The heat, as well as the effect of the green soft feeding when sheep are on pasture, loosen the droppings and this soilsthe wool. The ever watchful fly lays its eggs on the filthy woo!, an 1 before anything is known the elicep are fly blown , alter which a few days is time enough to cover the whole hindquar ters with the maggots. It is a very difficult thing then to save the sheep. It is worth while to save the tags and after a few days' soaking in water to have tlieni washed and taken care of. —Farm, Field and Fireside. BEAN AS A FERTILIZER. Thirty odd years ago the late Solon Robinson, after making some experi ments with wheat bran and corn meal as fertilizers on his lawn, declared they were fully as cheap for this pur pose as uny of the commercial fertil izers then on the market. Several ex perimenta have been made with hrau and what are called "middlings" as fertilizers for grass, and with good results. All planters at the South knew what a chaugo lias been wrought within the last two or threo decades in the use of cotton seed, and cotton seed meal and waste from the oil mills for enriching the soil for all kinds of crops. At a recent meeting of mill owners at Louisville this subject of using wheat hrau as a fertilizer was Hgaiu brought to the fore uud highly oudorsed by those who have tested it practically. If chemical analysis is worth anything as a test of tiio fer tilizing value of wheat bran, then at the price at which it has been selling for tho last year or two it is worth more than its cost ns a manure. Most farmers, however, will prefer to feed it to their nniinals and then save tho manure, but it cannot be maintained that anything is added to the value of tho bran as a fertilizer by this process. —New York Sun. TREATMENT OF AN ORCHARD. Tho trcatnicut of an orchard is a subject of importance and should he well studied. If the laud is so wet that it needs draiuage. it is not lit for use on this account. The land must then be drained, or tho Irecs will uot thrive.. Tho roots will run into tho | drains and choke them, making double j mischief, for the land will soon be as wet as beforo and the labor and money ! will be lost. Clay laud is not tho best j for an orchard; a lightish, gravelly] land is better, and still liioio so if it i is limestone. It would bo better to set tho orchard far from the house in lighter laud than iu clay because of its nearness. If the hind ie clay, but not wet, it may bo improved by sub soiling it; that is, by plowing 111 the furrow of a common plow and im mediately after it with a bar plow that is, one with a long bar like a coulter that will break the subsoil and loosen it. This might bo done in a strip botweeu the rows of trees and about six feet wide, but near the trees the land should bo plowed no deeper than a few inches, lest the small roots bo broken and the trees checked in growth. It is a good thing for an orchard to be sown with clover and pastured by swino or snoop.— American Farmer. IIARDY WINTER OATS. Winter oats are one of tho best pay ing crops that can bo grown, writes a Delaware' farmer. Wherever intro duced they are superseding spring oats entirely. Oats are essentially cool weather crop, uud failures either partial or totnl with spring oats, on account of tho hot, dry weather of Juno and July, are so common that many farmers nro entirely discouraged from growing them. This trouble is entirely obviated by substituting win ter oats. They are sown at tho snmo time as winter wneat, and ripen with wheat tho following season, so that the harvesting and threshing may all bo done at the same time. The variety we grow iu Delaware is perfectly hardy—as much so as Fultz wheat and withstands tho severest weather , perfectly. On good Roil a yield of j lifty to eighty bushels is common. They grow a strong, stiff straw, which stands up well. They are a very heavy oat, a measured bushel weighing from thirty-eight to forty-five pounds. I have known crops of these onts this season that gave an average of eighty bushels per acre on twenty to thirty aero field*. One and a half bushels per acre are enough to sow. Winter oats nro nlso a good crop to seed clover with. Tho same fertilization and tillage that will produce a good wheat crop will give a big crop of win ter oats.—American Agriculturist, STRAW AS FEED. The value ot straw for feeding pur poses depends almost entirely on the method of harvesting. The riper tho grain is allowed to become, the drier nEtl less nutritious is the straw. It is well known that rye-grass hay out be fore the seed is ripe is much more val uable and fetches a higher price than it does if the seed is allowed to ripeu beforo cutting. So it is with every other species of that kind of food. Hay and straw are practically the same crop, though cut at different stages of growth, which is n fact too frequently overlooked. When feeding largely on such suc culent food as roots or grains, straw should be given at least twice a day, as it is found that without straw or lmy cattle do not thrive so well. Tho different sorts of straw have, as re gards their nutritive value, been placoel in the following order : 1, pea straw; 12, oat-straw; 3, beau-straw, with tho pods; 4, barley-straw; 5, what straw; C, bean-straw, without the pods. Tea-straw, if properly har vested in a dry season, is a most valu able food, and should never be used as litter. If, however, it has been much rained upon, and, is consequent ly dirty and more or less mouldy, it will sour stock. For sheep it is most excellent. Horses, too, are very fond of, nud thrive well upon it. Of the white straws, oat straw is undoubtedly tho most valuablo for feeding, hut its value depends much upon tho time of cutting. Oats should be cut when tolerably green, and al though part of the grain may bo lost in this way, it is gained in another, and the straw is in a condition most valuable for stock feeding. Beau straw, woll harvested, is a very hearty and nutritious food for cart horses and cattle during the w iutor, and hero again the value of tho straw is depend ent on the timo of cutting, says a writer in Farm and Home. If cut while yet green and before the leaves have fallen off, we liavo a fodder of great value; but if allowed to stand until quite ripe tho leavos fall off, and the straw, besides containing less nu triment, becomes So hard and woody that it is necessary to chaff and stoam it before stock can make any use of it. Barley straw, especially when mixed with a good proportion of clover, is of great importance in the economy of the farm. Barley straw grown in the South is considered better than that grown in the North, it being difficult in tho latter portion of tho country to snve it in tolerable order, especial ly with clover. Wheat straw, cut into chaff, is much used for horses and cat tle. Iu consuming straw, the iuforior sorts should be tirst made use of, and afterwards thoso of a better kind, and when feeding stock on large quanti ties of this coarse aud dry articlo, al ways allowing plenty of succulent food or have an abundant supply of water at hand.—New York World. r.LKM AND GARDEN NOTES. Don't forget to give the horse some salt. A little grease will sometimes save a lot of horse. Now is tho season to reap tho To ward of your labor. After bringing tho horse in brush off his feet aud legs. Don't keep nuy auimal on tho farm that does not pay a profit. Endeavor to have the home sur roundings pleasing to tho eye. Every farmer should keep a set o! books the same as any other business man. If the stable is kept sweet aud clean it will largely reduce tho number of flics. Market all quarrelsome roosters, over-fat hens aud non-laying pullets liofore cold weather. When the orchard begius boaring if should receive an annual dressing ol phosphoric acid aud potash. A little nitrate of soda sprinkled in tho rows aud hills of the lima beans will hasten the growth of the vines. Fowls which feather and mature early are usually good producers ol eggs, good sitters aud good mothers. There will havo to bo considerable "head-work" used during harvesting in order to make everything dovetail. Bo sure to feed green corn to tho cows. In no other way cau it boused to pay so well. .Sweet corn is prefer able uutil cold weather, thou field corn is better. Some people seem to forget that tho amount of profit on a pound of butter often depends as much on re ducing tho cost of production as in obtaining an enhanced price. Tho dairyman's responsibility for the caro of his cows is not all gone when ho is able to turn thorn out to grass in tho early summer. The moro he feels his responsibility in this di rection, aud acts upon it, the moro valuable will his dairy becomo to him. Compared with well-rotted barn manure, there are 48.00 pounds of phosphoric aoid in hen manure to six in barn-yard manure; and sixty-seven pounds of nitrogen to eleven iu barn yard manure. The analysis is based on a ton each of hen aud barn-yard manures. A duckling at a week old should weigh four ouuees; two weoks, nine ounces; three weeks, one pound; four weeks, ouo pound and nine ounces; five weeks, two pounds and two ounces; six weeks, two pouuds nnd eleven ounces; seven weeks, three pounds nnd five ounces; eight weeks, four pounds; nine weeks, four pounds and eight ounces. THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE. STORIES THAT ARE TOLD BY THE FUNNY MEN OF THE PRE3S. A Fisherman's Itoir aiiec—Retrospec tion—True Afloat and Ashore—An Honest Man, Ktc., Ktc. He walked the stream tlio lifelong lny. With rod and reel and fly, Am! then went home and reveled in One long, luxuriant lie. —Philadelphia Record A SLOWLY ACQUIRED ART. Horn— "Can't you ride a wbeel yet? Why, Mr. Bilverspoou has beeu teach ing you for three weeks!"' Cora—"l kuow it. But lie hasn't proposed yet." FRANKLY HOSTILE. Mrs. Dotell—"What is your policy with rofercuco to old bachelors?" Mrs. l'enormoro (mother of a largo family of marriageable daughters) - - "Extermination!"— Puck. ON TIIE PIAZZA. "How long has Miss Short been ft summer girl?" "Well, I'vo been coming here ten years—ob, hero she is—why, Miss Shoit, howyouug and pretty you look this morning?"— Boston Gazette. CIRCUITOUS. "Why did sho marry Fiddle back?" "Because sho was in love with an other man, and tho man was in lovo with another girl, and the girl was iu love with Fiddlobaek. it was the only way she could get even with other girl you see I"—Life. RETROSPECTION. Nuwed—"According to you, I never told you a single truth before wowcro married." Mrs. Nuwed—"Oh, George, you weren't quite as bad as all that. Don's you remember you always used to say you were unworthy of me?" —Life. THOSE FOOLISH QUESTIONS. Stififkins (a neighbor)—" Hello 1 Jones, what you doin'? Laying down a carpet?" Jones (who has just whacked his thumb) -"No! you blasted idiot—tho carpet was here when wo moved iu. I am just putting the tloor under P." Truth. TRUE AFLOAT AND ASHORE. "Why," asked the now boarder, "why do you say that there is a re semblanco between riding a bicycio and sailing a boat?" "Because," said tho Cheerful Idiot, "because you lose the wind when you get on the wrong tack."—lndianapolis Journal. A LOT OF TROUBL? Lottie —"lt's a very inconvenient oustom to wear the eugagouieut ring on the third linger of tho loft hand." Kiltie—"Why? What difference doos it make?" Lottie "Because it's so hard to learn to use your left instead of your right hand." SHE MEANT NOTHTXO. "Do you know," iie was saying, "that I never can keop my head under water when I go swimming. I've tried and tried." "Perhaps you don't try long enough," she said iu an absent-minded way, and he is still wondering what she meant.—Detroit Free Press, A PROPHET. "This is a hot summer,"' said Jig gles, as he and Mr. Wilton sat on the piazza.' "Yes," said Wiltou, with a nod at Mrs. Wilton mounting her bicycle out 011 tho driveway—"yes; but if Mrs. Wilton doesn't take care, I think wo shall have an early fall."—Harper's Bazar. AN HONEST MAN. The Blind Man (in louo voice) - "Hi, there! you varmint! v liet that 'ere cali'a liver alone. I'm poor, but I'm liouest, an' I wouldn't let even a dog of mine steal." Sy in pathetic Old Lady (overhearing) "Hero is a quarter, poor man ! I always like to reward honesty and truthfulness."—Puck. TOLD T3E TRUTH. Boarder (from tho .pity) —"You wrote mo you wore never bothered by mosquitos; and they have nearly stung me to death before I've been here livo minutes." Farmer—"J didn't say anything 'bout 'em botherin' you, did I? I paid they never bothered mo, and they don't; I'm use' to 'em."—Puck. OREE?I ENOUSY. "Country raised?" asked the moro I cultivated raspberries, with a super cilious sneer. The watermelon flared up at tho in tended insult. "I'm not so green as I look," it re torted hotly. But the doctor who came in at night and felt of tho boy's pulse said ho wasn't so sure about that.— Bouklaud Tribune. TOOK CnANCES AND LOST. "If you're the man that answers tho questions," said tho lanky personage iu tho faded brown suit who had climbed four flights of stairs iu search of information, "I wish you would tell me who it was that shrieked when Kosciusko fell?" "Freedom," replied the answer j-to questions editor, glancing up at him and resuming his work. "Then I've lost a good hat," re joined tho Jauky caller, sighing -heavily and turning to go. "J though; it was Marco Bozzaris."— Chicago Tribune.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers