SUCH IS LIFE—Just So! THE PATTON COURIER By Charles Sughroe waif © Western Newspaper Union SINGULAR IS ONE= PLURAL \ (THEN IS "TROUSERS" SINGULAR. OR. PLURALS Has New Theory of Longevity Paris.—Search has been renewed for a Russian couple suited to the strange experiment by which an el- derly American philosopher hopes to prove that man's natural position, like that of the four-footed beasts, is re- ¢clining. Park Hammer of St. Louls, sixty- seven-year-old retired paint manufae- turer and experimental philosopher, was revealed as the author of a series of unusual advertisements appearing in the newspaper La Renaissance. When Hammer's latest advertisement appeared he disclosed that he had not found a couple suitable for the test, although there were many who were willing to try it. Hammer said he wanted a couple who would go to the United States When a man's wife is away from home he feels free to act as he did when a bachelor, but he seldom does so, you'll notice. for one year to live in bathing suits, eat vegetables and fruit and obey his instructions concerning sleeping. The couple would be required to sleep in short periods stretched out on a log and to spend their waking hours swimming. In explaining his belief that his pro- pesed experiments would aid in re- gaining the horizontal position he thinks natural to man, Hammer said that death is unnatural and that longevity is possible if a perfect bal- ance of the body's action and inac- tion, recomposition and decomposition is attained. He said that such a balance could be attained through a raw herbal diet, fresh air and sleeping on a log. “I believe sleep is unnecessary if the body functions properly and fre quent rest intervals follow mental or body exercises,” Hammer said. “I am going through with this experiment myself when I find a suitable Russian couple. “So far I have examined 100 candi- dates but have not found exactly what I desired.” The St. Louisan said he hoped the new advertisement in the newspaper would be successful and that he would Ambassador and Historic Engine Ambassaavr Dawes is here seen at the throttle of the historie locomotive “Northumbrian” which was one of the interesting exhibits at the railway centenary exposition in Liverpool, England. This engine originally drew the state coach of the duke of Wellington, who defeated Napoleon at Waterloo. be able to sail for the United States in the fall to start his experiments near St. Louis. Later, he said he planned to remove to a beach either in California or In Florida. OK XN PENCE { CONQUERING ¢ YOURSELF : By THOMAS ARKLE CLARK Dean of Men, University of Illinois. Carter was telling a group of young people something of the story of his life. He was what the world would call a very suc- cessful man. He was prominent as a banker; he was at the head of many organiza- tions and boards of influence; and in spite of the fact that he was looked upon as a political power, his integrity and his character had never peen questioned. I had singled him out when he came into the room, for he was a person of distinguished appearance—tall, straight, square- shouldered, and perfectly poised. “My father taught me many les- sons,” he said, when he began talking, “and one of these which left a lasting impression on me was a sentence which he wrote in my copy book and which I was to produce in an effort equal my father’s careful penmanship. ‘Whip George Carter, it said. I am not sure that I fully understood its meaning at the time, but I understand better now. It is the problem of self- control. If one is, to get anywhere in the world he must subdue himself— his body, his mind, his emotions.” I had watched a baseball game that afternoon. There was a long drive by the batter out to right field beyond the regch of the outfielder, it seemed at fist, but he started for it. “He won't get it,” we all said in chorus, but we were mistaken. He had the trained eye, and the swift feet, and just as we thought that he had no chance, he reached out with one hand and snatched the ball from the air. He had learned perfect con- trol of his body. It was only a little later that the umpire made a decision which the on- lookers questioned. The official had called the runner out, when it seemed quite evident that he was safe. The coach, a husky middle-aged man, jumped to his feet, excited, abusive, shouting words which may not be printed. But the umpire was prob- ably right, for he was in a better po- sition to see than were the rest of us, and besides it was his business to make the decision. The coach was a man who had not learned to whip George Carter—his emotions were still unsubdued. Griswold is young and talented, but the habit of drink has got possession of him. He does not always drink to excess, but every so often he comes home drunk. He knows it is a bad habit, and in his saner moments he knows that for him some day it will spell ruin. “It is too much for me,” he admits, “I can't manage myself. I suppose I shall always drink.” Wilson can't get down to work. He has a good mind, but it is stubborn, lazy, given over to moods, and he has never got it under control. He strug- gles with it at times, but it has never really been whipped. It is a great fight, this, which we have daily with our minds, our bodies and our passionate emotions. Few of us have ourselves properly whipped. (©, 1930, Western Newspaper Union.) “l Take Care of My Baby” hp LIGHTS OF NEW YORK By WALTER TRUMBULL We had the jig-saw puzzle, mah-jongg, the cross-word craze, which swept the country like a tidal wave; but it is doubtful whether any of them ever exerted as much effect on the country at large as this midget golf game has done. It has swept the hills like a winter wind and the plains like a Exiled Mexican Leader Still Hopes Tucson, Ariz.—There resides in this border town a rancher who has a good idea of how Napoleon felt when he was banished to St, Helena to pon- der the vicissitudes of war. He Is the former General Fran- cisco Robles Manzo, 260-pound ex-un- dersecretary of war of Mexico, com- mander of Sonora and the conqueror of the Yaquis. Today he is a political refugee from his native country. In the 1929 Escobar rebellion Gen- eral+Manzo served as a commander of all rebel forces in northwestern Mex- fco. With the defeat of his army by the federals he was driven across the international boundary, leaving be- YALE ASPIRANT Sandy Wiener, former tennis protege of Big Bill Tilden, devotes his talents to the gridiron and endeavors to win a place on the Yale 1930 football team hind him a fortune accumulated after years of labor in his home at Ortiz, Sonora, Mexico. Despite his comparatively low estate here, the once noted military leader may look across the boundary of his mother country to a number of eco- nomic achievements which still stand as monuments in Ortiz to his enter- prise. In making his escape he left be- hind 5,660 head of cattle, a $25,000 light and power system; a modern water works which he founded, ex- tensive ranching intewests, some 200 miles of improved highways in and adjacent to Ortiz, and modern bar- racks housing some 2,000 soldiers whom he commanded. “Whatever glory that was once mine was wiped out in a moment,” he said, smiling sadly. “But I still have my wife and four children and I am a good rancher—so perhaps 1 should not be despondent. There still may be brighter days ahead.” And the once highly honored fed- eral officer, clad now in dungarees, goes about his work as any other Mex- ican laborer. And occasionally from 0-0-0-00000000000U00000000000 POTPOURRI C-0-0-000000000000000000000 The Copper Capital Butte, Mont.,, is the copper dred and fifty mines operate in Q “ capital of the world. Some hun- the vicinity of that city and at Washoe, twenty-six miles away, is located the world’s greatest reduction works. Approximate- ly one-fourth of the American production and one-seventh of the world’s production comes from this vicinity. ©. 1930, Western Newspaper Union.) 0-0-0-000000000000000000000 his lips sound Mexican national an- thems he loves so well, Incidentally, one of General Manzo's favorite historic characters is Na- poleon. SPECIAL FOR FALL Raf ARSE Here's a chic costume for fall wear. A frock of bright blue covert cloth is trimmed with rickrack in white pique. An agnes tam of blue is bound with a band and bow of white grosgrain ribbon. prairie fire. One of its peculiar as- pects is that, unlike most crazes, which spread from the big cities to the country, this game started in the small towns and extended to the big ones. . * w Midget golf goes under many names. In some parts of the country it is called Putt-putt; in others Pee-wee; in still others Tom Thumb. There is a course just outside New York which bears the name of the Demi. Tasse Country club. But the game Is the same at all of them. I am told that there is a man who holds a pat- ent on some essential part of the out- fit and that he is collecting plenty in royalties. Whether this is so, T do not know. - . * The value of the game Is, of course, the turnover. By that I mean that the players pass around in an endless chain, and when they get to the end, either have to get out or buy another ticket, as they might on a scenic rail way. Moreover, the player behind alwuys is trying to hurry the player ahead, so there Is little delay. Tt is a game that a man can step right in off the sidewalk and play, without changing any of his clothes or mak- ing any special preparation. It also Is a game that a boy can play with his girl, and at which she has an equal chance, * . * Horace M. Albright, director of national parks, believes that sooner or later landing fields will have to be provided for those who visit the parks by plane. Thousands of visitors now use the automobile, but it will only he a few years before families will put the tent in the airplane and start on a vacation, . . - This didn't happen in any village. but in the main post office of a large eastern city of the United States. A man took to the stamp window a pack- age he wished to mail to a town in New Mexico. “Yowll have to take this to another window.” said the clerk. *“We don't figure’ foreign postage here.” * * * It was one of those pathetic cases. Life never had given her a break, She never had anything; but she found something down in Wall Street, He was a chap with a big heart, who had sold short and put it away in bonds. So pretty soon the girl had the closet filled with fur coats and a store. “Use it.” this. simple 2-carat ring on every finger. The ones on the thumbs and the ear- rings were larger, and, if she had been a centipede she still would have had two slippers for every foot. The man was forced by circumstances to go to a fashionable resort. Soon he tele- graphed the girl to join him at an- other hotel. She failed to arrive, so he wrote asking for an explanation. She replied that she was eager to be with him, but that she had no suit- able clothes for such a place. “Get all the clothes you need. Have opened account in your name,” he wired, naming a smart Fifth avenue The girl followed instructions. She | selected and charged a trousseau and eloped with another man. “Absence makes the heart grow fonder—for somebody else.” LI . There is a tall, straight, old man who usually is to be found walking on Eighth avenue. In one hand he carries a cane which he frequently flourishes as if it were a sword. Over the other arm invariably is draped a carefully folded United States flag. I don't know who he is or why he does (©. 1930, Bell Syndicate.) HELD PERFECT INDIAN Yellow Head of the Glacier national park reservation, who has been se- | lected by artists as one of the perfect physical types of the American Indian, H eadaches come at the most inconvenient times, but there’s one thing that will always save the day. If you have some Bayer Aspirin you can soon be on your way. The sooner you take it the less time you'll lose —the less you'll suffer. Shopping frequently brings on a headache. Over-exertion of any kind. Eye-strain. Or just “nerves.” Often it's the time of month. Regardless of the cause, you want relief. And you get relief when you take Bayer Aspirin. Take promptly! It will relieve the pain at any stage, but why wait until you are miserable? Bayer Aspirin BAYER can’t harm you, because there is nothing harmful in it. Remember this, when you're tempted to try some product that costs a few cents less! ASPIRIN “Human Gorilla” Found Comrade in Adversity A customers’ man temporarily out of a job ran into a friend who owned a circus and asked him for some- thing to do. “Well, the gorilla recently died,” said the friend, “and if you want to get his skin, swing on the trapeze, growl a bit and amuse the children, you can have the job.” The customers’ man filled the bill well until one day the rope on which he was swinging snapped and he was catapulted into the lion's cage. The lion, seeing him, let out a lusty roar to which he offered a timid yelp. The lion roared more menacingly. The pseudo-gorilla lost his nerve and became entirely human, backed into a corner yelling “help, help.” The lion thereupon came closer and said in a hoarse whisper, “Shut up, you d—d fool, you are not the only customers’ man out of a job.”— Wall Street Journal. Bee Expert to the Rescue Ernest Melrose, bee expert, stepped off a bus in Oxford street, London, and saw traffic paralyzed by thousands of bees swarming on a street light. He received hun- dreds of cheers and only one sting after he borrowed a ladder from the electric light company, a cardboard box lined with glycerine from a drug store, a mosquito net from a drap- er's, a pair of gloves from a de- partment store, and got most of the bees in the box and several hun- dred of them inside his coat, shirt and trousers. Resign yourself to the certainty that the world is not going to be perfected in your day. Thousands of people were never intended to be linked in matrimony; but they have to find out. Youth Selected Stone According to Custom Will H. Hays, the mogul of the movies, said at a dinner in Los An- geles: “A young society woman has just divorced her sixth husband and mar- ried her seventh. That's very mod- ern. It reminds me of a story. “ ‘Bully for you! a society woman said to her intended, a society man, as she gazed at the superb ring he had just slipped on her finger. ‘You've struck my favorite stone. That’s more than any of the others ever did. “The young man nodded in a com- placent way. “ ‘It’s the stone I always use, he said.” WOMEN SHOULD LEARN USES OF MAGNESIA To women who suffer from nausea, or so-called “morning sickness,” this is a blessing. Most nurses know it. It is advised by leading specialists: Over a small quantity of finely cracked ice pour a teaspoonful of Phillips’ Milk of Magnesia. Sip slow- ly until you are relieved. It ends sick stomach or inclination to vomit. Its anti-acid properties make Phil- lips’ Milk of Magnesia quick relief in heartburn, sour stomach, gas. Its mild laxative action assures regular bowel movement. Used as a mouthe wash it helps prevent tooth decay during expectancy. Safety First Teacher—What ig mostly raised in damp climates? Pupil—Umbrellas.—Stray Stories. Can't PLAY Can’t R E S T —child needs Castoria When a child is fretful and irritable, seems distressed and un- comfortable, can’t play, can't sleep, it is a pretty sure sign that some- thing is wrong. Right here is where Castoria fits into a child's scheme— the very purpose for which it was formulated years ago! A few drops and the condition which caused the trouble is righted; comfort quickly brings restful sleep. Nothing can take the place of Castoria for children; it's perfectly harmless, yet always effective. For the protection of your wee one— for your own peace of mind—keep this old reliable preparation always on hand. But don’t keep it just for emergencies; let it be an every-day aid. Its gentle action will ease and soothe the infant who cannot sleep. In more liberal doses it will F Creation of the . Box 1000,Sta Common Steck of Going Company at $5 ys 10% dividends. Write for 0CCl1O, 211 AMABELL:- ST, , PENNSYLVANIA. SEND FOR LITERATURE Showing beautiful designs in oil painted n cushion tops. Transpacific Sales Western Ave., Seattle, Wash LADIES To sell rain and sport coats, Latest style. Liberal commission. Write IDEAL MFG, CO. GALION, OHI10. ie oN © a TT Lp haats BS Lacnad 40¢=> Ts ; effectively help to regulate sluggish bowels in an older child. All druggists have Castoria; it's genuine if you see Chas. H. Fletcher's signature and this name-plate: soning En FOR SAMPLE of new best s buys. Money back immediate West Swa Agents Wanted. Men, Ladies, Canvassers and church worl Clean and pr able work 100% profit.Full details free.S anager, Box 9022, (Bloomfield) Pit I Pa. New Zealand White Rabbits for meat and fur. High class breeding stock for sale $2.60 to $7.50, Let us know your wants, I'rego’s Rabbitry, Littleton, Colo. ancred 300 Egg Blood White Leghorns, Laying pullets, yearling hens, 16 weeks pullets, cockerels half price. October book- ing. R. E. Sandy, Stuart Draft, Va. These “kr man classes ¢ Eye Use of Gog to Worl tria New York.—. and at least $ in two recent y employing a tot according to th titled “Eyes Sa published by th the Prevention National Safety The two org discover the t cases of workn serious injury ¢ use of goggles « The survey kept by the co and 1927, discl to the financial and women wel injury or total | during the tw 4,664 recorded | being saved fre one eye, making saved from des Jury. First Stu “In this study ever made,” exj ris, managing di Society for the ness, “it was as which hit a go force as to pier would most cert: the eye, if the worn, as to cau complete loss o sumed, further, a goggle lens b metal or by cc injurious chemi eye saved. “The eye haz come to be one causes of blindn is, in fact, cons the belief that sons are permar sight by occup: by any other n ness. Huge Fi “This is due lg innumerable per employees alike, do not believe f prevent accident: particular occup are engaged. It failure on the | employees and co appreciate the loss resulting fi men and women “Despite the ments of many iI prevention of acc specffically in th SEVEN | Mexican Indians, Pay Little H Gove Mexico City.— Cora Indians in see no reason w away which has for them, such as ment of Mexico, ¢ what to do, afte in May to count t It seems that takers discovere( whom the circum more than one wi looking this, the ported it and nov Coras are in wate! hot. Though among Indians ever fount the western hemis and their kin tribe
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers