THE PATTON COURIER FINNEY OF THE FORCE IF WE CANT = MARRY SNOOP OUT AV THE NAYBORHUD “SURE, WE MUST FOIND SOME THER WAY AV CLEARIN UP THE STATIC ~~ By F. O. Alexander Newepapor Unteny AR SURE, MRS. SNOOP- O! HAVE A GREAT JOR IN MOIND FER eZ! -WiTH A VOICE LOIKE “YOouRS, YE2 / CUD GIT THE JOB AISV. OH» AND IS IT A POSITION IN A MUSIC COLLEGE < ar °o ft ‘ / " | ELL IT IS |g E “% Oo HAD / We iT ANT! 1 | SING -SING /7’ drt iN MoiND./ SHE COULDN’T MISS IT “My wife,” said Brown, “has a ter- rible memory, She simply forgets everything.” “Well,” remarked Jones, “mine used to be that way, but I found a way to cure her.” “How was that?” “If there is something I am anxious wr this enlightened age baby something she s perfectly harmless, » few drops of plain Sr , THE By Charles Sughroe © Western Newspaper Union MICKIE ey for her to know and remember I write it on 1 card and put the ecard in my trousers pocket.” BUT UNCLE JOHN NEVER ADVERTISES = 1] 0) \GHY SHOULD HE NEED HELP? WHITHER WHENCE CAPABLE AND UP-TO-DATE 74 WN SUCH A HURRY =2= ht a baby’s stomach \ ny little ill. Fretful- ‘ 00; it seems no time EoD . VYOU'RE CARRYING : is serene. , BY OUR LIL TOO MUCH SPEED=) 1.” THATS Just uty of Castoria; its MICKIE . J WE DOES seems just what is Soy WHY all that castor oil " MOTYO FOR _ \'M. GONNA NEED HELP DOWN “TO UNCLE JOHNS “To WORK IN HIS STORE 1, without shock te THE hout the evil taste. @ leing purely vegeta- rive it as often as colic; constipation ; iA to aid sound, nat- ning: it is genuine ria that physicians er preparations may ym all doubtful drugs, his writer's is going esides, the book on of babies that comes Jastoria is worth its n Cry for “Is the gardener’s daughter capable and up-to-date?” “I'll say she is—hoes her own row and knows how to handle a rake.” Paging Inventors I wish that I could find the man Who would invent and sell An onion with an onion taste But not an onion smell. %. (THE EARLY IE pone Lat HUNTER GETS i A No Interest in Life Sly J pl ZZ Husband (anxiously) — My wife digestion pstipation sonstipaticn bowel regular rlain’s Tal No, | THINK [0 (IKE TO BE AN ENGINEER DUCKS seems not to have the slightest inter- est in life, Doctor — What makes you think that? Husband—Well, I've tried her with golf, billiards, football and racing and it’s just like talking to a stome.—Men- treal Star. Pneumatic Trouble st results 4? hsi “My back feels terrible—rheuma- c pocket Sel 2 i For free Treaftt 20 lain Med. J 5 Molnes, 1aNG ERS ERLAINS IS Siayisii d Wire Cuts ANFORD’S of Myrrh ed to refund your money for the tle if not suited. y! Kitty! e is thirty-five years Did you make it your- d fault when there i# alts. THE BLUE RIBBON WINNER (Copyright, W. N. uJ.) pyTig tism, I think.” “Didn’t T hear you say you'd pumped up four tires?” “Yes, why?’ “Then it’s pneumatism you've got, not rheumatism.”—Boston Transcript, Costly Diplomacy She—Darling, which of these new dresses do you like? He—Why, ther're both very pretty, dear. She—Oh, you're so generous! Now I won't need to send either of them back.—Pathfinder, Slipped His Mind Office Boy—Lady to see you, sir. Absent-minded Empleyer—Tell her I'm engaged. Office Boy—That's just what she’s come about, sir. She says you were to have married her this morning. — ———— — -— - — THE FEATHERHEADS A HARD GUY There Must Be dney Function. are the blood filters. ion becomes sluggish yughly cleanse the blood astes. Such impurities red and achy with often he, drowsy headaches A common warning of ey action is scanty ot 18. imulant diuretic, aid the liminative work. 50,000 blicly recommended r neighbor! \ I X ‘ NO NO H W Ton Ths WE HEY WATCH THE BALL= : FEATHERUEAD oH WELL - FEARuenDy ) A i L ? CADDY f.. 50 AMEAD If ? rvs ® Th Te X To al 4 Tp 2 peLetep / 5 PAN ganar WHY DONT You WHY DONT WHY DONT YA She—You're no longer friendly wiih Mr, Stone, then? He—No, he’s a hard guy. An Empty Dream “Tell me not in mournful numbers Life is but an empty dream.” When the catfish bite like thunder As I fish the sparkling stream. Worth Any Amount Specialist—I assure you, madame, my course will make an entirely dit- ferent woman out of you. Client’s Husband—That settles ft. R R Tak , Margaret—never mi N'S PILLS Lookt Lie Yoke Q YA LooKwiEs Look pene, A Te ae jing fie Cc ) 2 HE [URETIC 7% KIDNEYS YOURE GON You RE GOIN J frre Co. Mig ChemBuffalo,NY. KOENIGS | VINE | LS yusness: & | lessness. | AT, YOUR DRUG STORE. or free Booklet ; MEDICINE CO. if LS ST..CHICAGO, ILL. sR Then Timmie Passed It On By PERCY L. CROSBY JLoprright, by tbe McClurg Newspaper Synd.cate Insulted “This fluid,” urged the girl at the glove counter, “is fine for cleaning kids.” “I wash my baby,” responded the woman customer, with some hauteur. Too Silent Buyer of Second-hand Automobile— Didn't you tell how silent the motor was in the car I bought from you?" Dealer—Yes, isn’t it? “It certainly is—it's been silent for two weeks now.” Made Her Shuffle Andrews—Jones can't help cheating | at cards, can he? Blake—No. Even when he plays ¢ solitaire he has to have his wife shufle the cards,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers