PAGE SIX
THE CITIZEN, FRIDAY, MAY 9, 1913.
Tips on the Tariff .Makers
CHAIRMAN OSCAR W. UNDERWOOD of the ways and means commit
tee, aside from being an authority on tariff schedules, Is notable for the
quality nnd character of his patience. Those long associated with him
declare that this Is so monumental that the late Job's, by comparison
to It, would look llko a molehill alongside the Washington monument
H t
Representative James It. Mann of Illinois, leader of the Republican minor
ity In congress and the principal opponent In the houso of the tariff measure,
was onco known as the "great objector." Arriving late at tho house ono day,
lie was hailed by another congressman.
"Don't stop me, for I'm late now!" ho gasped breathlessly.
"I know you are," replied the other, "or othcrwlso you'd have been in time
to object to the chaplain's prayer."
5 t f.
Senator P. M. Simmons, chairman of the senate finance committee, gained
distinction in his native state of North Carolina long before he wore the toga
as an organizer of peerless ability and endless activity. When he was not
organizing the Democratic state compaign ho turned his hand at getting up
Sunday school picnics nnd patriotic parades with equal success.
V. Vt l
Senator William Hughes of New Jersey, ono of tho leading members of the
senato finance committee, who, coming from the president's own state, has had
an Important voice in all tariff matters, had his first job as a reel boy in ono of
tho Paterson (N. J.) silk, mills.
iSt
Senator John Sharp Williams of Mississippi, former leader of the houso
Democrats when his party was greatly in the minority and now a member of
tho senato finance committee, is the son of a Confederate officer who was killed
at tho battlo of Shiloh. He created something of a sensation a few years ago
by indulging in n fiery speech in the houso defending the memories of tho
Union generals Sheridan and Sherman against tho animadversions of a repre
sentative from Pennsylvania.
, t .
When Senator Hoke Smith first attained national prominence in politics he
had much fun poked at his name. But after awhile the Jokesters discovered
that his first name originally was Mike, and then they quit.
Beforo Cordell Hull, tho young congressman from Tennessee who framed
tho Income tax bill, was elected to the houso ho was twico a member of the
istato legislature and a judge of tho Fifth circuit court district of Tennessee.
He is also a veteran, having commanded a company of infantry from his state
during tho Spanish war.
Today's Short Story I
Mistaken Identity
inpiIEY say, Charlie, that tho lovo
J between twins is something far
beyond ordinary fraternal affec
tionthat a man will suffer any
amount for his twin. You have a twin
brother, so you ought to know if this
Is true. How is it?"
"You mean suffer things willingly?"
"Of course. Why do you ask that?"
"Well, sometimes a fellow will suffer
for another when ho doesn't want to."
"I don't understand you."
"It's this way: I'm fond of Dan just
as you say twins arc, but I want you
to understand one thing tho next time
Dan gets sick and has to go to a hos
pital I propose to let tho doctors and
tho nurses tako care of him."
"Something unpleasant must have
happened while Don was in tho hos
pital last summer."
"Well, I should smile."
"Smile, then, and tell the story."
"Well, not long after tho surgeons
had been carving Dan I went to seo
him. Tho door of tho hospital being
open, I walked in, expecting to seo a
Janitor or somebody connected with
the institution who'd show me to Dan's
room. Nobody being around just then,
I walked to tho rear of tho building,
looking for an attendant
"Suddenly I heard a woman's voice:
'"Heavens! There's my patient
walking about delirious!' There was a
smash of crockery, and, turning, I saw
a nurse looking at me with horror, n
heap of broken dishes at her feet
which sho had just dropped from .a
tray. Another nurse camo out of a
door, nnd tho two made a dlvo for mo.
"I'm a pcaceablo fellow and can bo
led llko n Iamb, especially by a wom
an or even two women if they aro
pretty, nnd both of these were, but
I'll bo JInged If I could stand having
each ono of them seize mo by a wrist
and attempt to forco mo up a stair
way, I resisted. Ono of them stepped
to an electric button and pressed it
It must havo sounded a general alarm,
for a man attendant came from ono
direction and another from another,
and tho nurso who'd, dropped the
dishes said:
"Tako him up to No. 34. When I
camo down to get his dinner ho got
up, dressed and camo downstairs. I'll
get discharged for this. Heavens!
There comes the house surgeon! Put
him in here.'
"Do you kUow, those two duffers
Just picked me up and hustled mo into
a room close by, while I kicked and
struck out like a maniac. They put
me on a bed, and one of them held me
down by main forco while tho other
rushed out for something. The nurse
my nurse, you know poured some
funny tasting stuff down my throat.
"Just at that moment something pop
ped into my head. I wondered why I
hndn't thought of it before. They had
mistaken mo for Dan. 1
'"See here, you people, you're bark
ing up tho wrong tree, aren't you? Do
you think I'm Dan Malone?'
" 'Funny,' remarked ono of tho men,
'how people who aro off their heads
always think they're some ono else.'
"'You blankety blank fools! You
go to Dan's room nnd see if you don't
find him there. I'm his twin brother.
I camo to see him.'
"Tho two nurses began to look at
each other, tho two men pricked up
their ears, nnd then my nurse said to
tho other ono:
'' 'Run up and see.'
"So sho did nnd In a minute camo
back Into tho room with a grin on her
face that looked like tho cat that ato
the canary.
' 'He's safe in bed,' sho giggled.
When tho hair splits clip or slngo tho
ends.
For Ink stains on tho fingers try lem
on and salt
H H
Corns can bo removed by daily rub
bing with toilet pumice.
? K
Apples form a good laxative when
eaten on an empty stomach.
To whiten finger nails nnd lmprovo
tho bands cut a fresh lemon In two
and rub In well nt night Wash off in
warm water the next morning. This
same treatment is excellent for stain?
on tho hands.
Letters of Introduction.
If you introduce a friend to a friend
it Is better to write a little letter In
advanco explaining tho coming visit.
This insures a cordial reception nnd ar
ranges for a meeting and for n prep
aration that relieves a strain.
A letter of Introduction should bo a
few sentences written on your own
note paper and inclosed in nn nddress
cd envelope which Is not sealed. Do
not make any reference to tho unhap
py circumstances of the bearer nnd
keep your own personal experiences
out of the note.
Tho letter should introduce the bear
er to the receiver and ask In polite
terms that nny little courtesy that can
be extended to the stranger be exer
cised. The recipient should be thank
ed for any help given.
The Summer Guest.
Don't make the mistake of usurping
family privileges if you are n guest.
For instance, don't give orders to the
servants in the houso and refrain from
doing anything that will disrupt tho
scheme of tho homo in which you are
visiting.
It is the duty of n visitor to be
ready for everything. If breakfast is
served at S and it Is your place to
find out the time for meals you should
not bo late. Nothing is more provok
ing to a hostess than to wait for a de
linquent guest and to sit down before
a cold meal. "Punctuality is tho po
liteness of kings" and tho hallmnrk of
a lady and gentleman. Don't fall in
punctuality just because you cannot
trace your family tree to William tho
Conqueror.
H 5
No Children In Black,
Young children should never be put
In black. It is entirely uncalled for,
conspicuous and cruel to tho childish
natures of the wearers.
FASHION TALKS
i-..i k r..
, ... , , , , ... , Tho width at tho low-
7032. Blouso with long shoulders, 34 to 40 bust er e(J lg two ynr(jg
7727, Three piece draped skirt 22 to 32 waist Tno Mny Manton' pat.
tern of the blouse, 7532, is cut in sizes from 34 to 40 inches, bust measure; of the
skirt, 7727, from 22 to 32 inches, waist measure. They will bo mailed to any ad
dress by the fashion department of this paper on' receipt of 10 cents each.
1 AT A GLANCE.
John B. Flower, a young Brooklyn
electrical engineer, is working on a sys
tem by which he hopes to bo ablo to
produce a typewriter operated by the
human voice.
t
Tho desert area of tho earth is said
to bo 4,180,000 square miles In extent
. .
The new banknotes which tho Unit
ed States treasury will issue some time
this- year are only about two-thirds
the size of tho money now in circula
tion. t
Marriage licenses are required in all
states and territories of tho Union ex
cept in Alaska, New Mexico nnd South
Cnrollna.
.
The first public school in New York
city was the Free School society,
founded in 1805.
. t
A tax on bachelor maids as well as
bachelors of ?5 per annum is being
considered by -Qie Massachusetts com
mittee on taxation.
SAYINGS OF SAGES.
Dean Swift is credited with
"Bread is the staff of life."
It was Keats who said, "A
thing of beauty is a Joy forever."
"Man proposes, but God dis
poses," remarked Thomas a
Kempis.
Franklin is authority for "God
helps those who help them
selves." It was an observation of Thom
as Southern that "Pity's akin to
love."
Edward Coke, the English Ju
rist was of tho opinion that "a
man's house is his castle."
"When Greek joins Greek, then
is the tug of war" was written
by Nathaniel Lee in 1C02.
SILK WITH TRIA1MINQ
OF BROCADE
13 nro wearing a
great deal of silk
this summer,
and it is certainly a
pleasure. This gown
shows striped silk with
sleeves of brocade, and
It Is worn with n dainty
embroidered collar nnd
frill. Both In materials
and treatment tho de
sign is a good one, for it
shows many now fea
tures. Tho draperj' at
tho left side of tho skirt,
the sleeves of contrast
ing materials and tho
muslin collar and cuffs
are all important Tho
same genernl effect
could bo obtained by
using cpouge, plain and
brocaded, or e p o n g 0
with plain material fig
ured, or white with col
ored, or, If liked, the
sleeves can be made to
match tho blouse instead
of being in contrast.
Figured foulard
throughout, with draped
girdle of tho plain,
would make a pretty ef
fect, or n very smart
gown could bo made of
crepo do chlno or char
mouso satin, with the
belt of tho now silk in
stained glass effect If
tho muslin collar Is not
liked It enn bo mado of
the trimming material,
with tho frill or jabot
only of tho muslin or
plain batiste. Tho skirt
is mado in three pieces,
and tho back is fitted
with littlo tucks at tho
waist lino. Tho blouso
shows tho drooping
shoulder lino that makes
such an important fea
ture. For tho medium size
the blouso will require
3V yards of material 27,
" yards SO or 1 yards
44 Inches wide, with
one-half yard 30 for tho
collar, cuffs and Jabot
and three-quarters yard
27 for tho sleeves. Tho
skirt will require 4
yards 27 or 30 or 3 yards
44 inches wide.
MASTER'S SALE
of
Vnlunblo ncnvlly Timbered
REAIj ESTATE
In Partition.
The undersigned, a Master ap
pointed by tho Court of Common
Pleas of Susquehanna county to
make sale of tho real estate in par
tition proceedings between William
Main et al. plaintiffs, and Robert H.
Roso ot al., defendants, will expose
to public sale and vendue at the
Court House in Montroso, Fa., on
Thursday, tho 15th dny of May, 1013
at two o'clock p. m., tno following
described real estate:
FIRST PIECE: Comprising 284
1-4 acres, more or less.
This piece is covered with heavy
timber chiefly hemlock, original
growth and also a portion of the wa
ters and ground thereunder of "Sil
ver Lake," ono of tho most beautiful
fresh water lakes in northeastern
Pennsylvania, and shore lino thereof
about three-quarters of a mile, mak
ing a very attractive spot for cot
tagers, fishing and boating; in tho
center of the hill country of Penn
sylvania about 1800 feet above sea
level.
SECOND PIECE Comprising
805 3-4 acres more or less.
This piece consists almost entirely
of very heavy virgin hemlock inter
spersed with some pine and hard
wood; ono of tho most valuable tim
ber tracts of Its size in the state of
Pennsylvania. Within easy reach of
railroad and shipping facilities, being
within ten miles of D., L. & W. R. R.
and L. V. R. R.
Any further information desired
concerning either tract will bo fur
nished by the Master, together with
map of tho tract.
JOHN S. COTJRTRIGIIT, Master.
Montrose, Susq'a Co., Pa.
A. B. SMITH, Attorney.
Montrose, Pa.
AUDITOR'S NOTICE. Estate of
Maria A. Hulftern,
Late of Preston, deceased.
Tho undersigned an auditor ap
pointed to report distribution of said
estate, will attend to the duties of
his appointment, on
Tuesday, May 20, 1013, 2 P. M.,
at his office in tho borough of
Honesdale, at which time and place
all claims against said estate must
be presented, or recourse to the fund
for distribution will be lost.
F. P. KIMBLE, Auditor.
Honesdale, April 12, 1913.
31w3.
tira.n and Cotton Hajkets?
.future -prises of Grain anl 1 CoMon-arsBO1
talng approximately" estlaatediCn tna baste of,
future cropweather coniltlons. This is m
Irocmi for aitlsatln? future, values. - Torlsf.
foroatlon regarding tbla service adlreti
TOSIZH'i UM8SI BVKAU, Tasnlnetcn.S.e;
ttnnarj.n:;Knnt:jmaJtttKuuKta
s
MAR1IJN LAUrltLl) I
Designer and IVIan
kfacturer of
ARTISTIC
MEMORIALS
Office and Works
1036 MAIN ST.
i HONESDALE, PA.
T,he Citizen wants a good, live
ly correspondent in every village In
Wayne county. Will you be one?
Write this office for particulars.
M&-ttsmf5) ID
rot New Yotk
rtiser tame
nurara
PROFESSIONAL CARDS.
Attornevs-ot-Liw.
ME, SIMONS, ,
. ATTORNEY 4 COUN8ELOK-AT-LAW
Office in the Court Houbo, Honesdale
Pa.
SEARLE & SALMON,
ATTORNEYS & COUNSELORS-AT-LATfl.
Offices lately occupied by Judge Searle
CHESTER A. GARRATT,
J ATTUUHKY S COUNSELOR-AT-LAW I
Offlce-Dlmmlck Building, Ilonesdale, Pa.
w
Al. H. LEE,
ATTORNEY A COUNBELOR-AT-LAW.
Office. Foster nulldlncr. All lppal hnnlnuR
promptly attended to. Honesdiile, Pa.
MUA1FORD & MUMFORD,
ATTORNEYS & COUNSELORS-AT-LAW
Office Liberty Hall buildlns. Honesdale
HOMER GREENE.
ATTORNEY A COUNSELOR-AT-LAW.
Offlco: Relf Building, Honesdale.
CHARLES A. AIcOARTY,
ATTORNEY A COUNSELOR- IT-LAW.
Special and prompt attention eiven to the
collection ot claims.
Office: Relf Building, Honesdale.
Physicians.
PB. PETERSON, M. D.
. 1126MAIN STREET, HONESDALE, PA.
Kye and Ear a specialty. The flttlne ot class
es clven careful attention.
U VERY
F. G. RICKARD Prop
WRST-CLASS WAGONS,
RELIABLE HORSES.
Especial Attention Given to
Transit Business.
HHHBa STONE BARN CHURCH STREET,
W. C. SPRY
HKACHLAKE.
AUCTIONEER
HOLDS SALES ANYWHERE
rx STATE.
OVER 65 YEARS'
EXPERIENCE
Trade Marks
Designs
CopmiGHTs &c.
Anyone sending n skcl rh nnd description may
nntrklr nftrartnlii nnr nitinton free whether an
Invontlon 18 probably pntentnblo. Comraunlca
lions strictly eoMldentfal. HANDBOOK on Patents
sent free. Oldest njrency for flocunnorpatentB.
Patents taken throuKU Jlunn & Co. receive
tptcuu notice, without cbargo, in tno
ciemific Ji ntertcatn
A tmndiomelr Ulnttrntod weeklr. Tjarireit cir
culation of any sclentliJo journal. Terms, 13 a
rear ; lour raoiuns, 91 ouiu uj oil newuaeaierB.
MUNN&Co.3G,B'ad"a'- New York
lirancb. Offlcn. C25 P 8U Washington, D. C.
J. E. HALEY
AUCTIONEER
Have mo and snvo money. Wl
attend sides anywhere in State.
Address, WAYMART, PA.(R. D. 3)
JOSEPH N. WELCH
Fire
The OLDEST Fire Insurance!
Agency in Wayne County.
Office: Second floor Masonic Build
ing, over C. C. Jadwln's drug store, j
Honesdale.
rtbutpyouf Eoouets, tiros.
L
iuh uiormiuon loom your nty, tttrfctiont, etc, to tut
.thousand ot Inoulrtrt from unW tho S.000.000 resident
City. .Tal service Is FflEB to til resort 4-
Brooayn Eigle the grestcst resort-tdver-
me united 5tte. SejjJisOBttt
welj(liwinon local pap" -
THElByMOISbBUREAtr
DAILY EAC