3 E Poetical Tar Makes a Trip Into the Interior and Corroborates Talc of Jonah PROCURES SOME INSIDE FACTS Pink Pajamas Bearing the Letter "J" Prove the Scriptural Character was Previous a Tenant Evicted Eventu ally and Picked Up by His Mates. Savannah, (Ja. If higher critics must expose the myths In Holy Writ they'd belter make nuothcr guess be fore they think they're It. For yes terday, when Jonas Home, of the barkentlne nolle White, had hoard a parson say the tale of .lonah wasn't right he left his new without a word and went away from there. He said lie couldn't stand to hear a He right after prayer. "It's 'downright sacrilege," he said, "the way those parsons talk. The truth, my boy, should aye prevail It's a winner In a walk. It happens 1 was swallowed once by the very self-name- whale that swallowed Jonah. (Have a drink?) This ain't no phoney tale. And being swallowed thus I found good evidence Inside, that the Jonah story was O. K. and that the parson lied. "I was just n youngster at the time, a greenhorn on a whaler, but thought I knew most everything, Just like your brand new sailor. Our ship, the Mol ly Brown, one day was bein' put about to start for home when up aloft the lookout gave a shout: '"A whale as big as Noah's ark! Great fish hooks, pipe the spout!' "We dropped the boats and started out to get him mighty quick. We pulled to windward, sneaking down upon him nice and slick. Old Jerry threw the harpoon in and then we pulled away. And was there some thin' doin'? Well, maybe. Somethin' gay! "I was standin' at the tiller, think In' I was mighty big, when Mr. Whale shoots up beneath and gives our boat a dig. I landed head down in the drink, and, feelin, quite romantic, I tried to yell goodby; instead, I swallowed some Atlantic. I feels a sort of suc tion then, and gee, it turned me cold I knew that I was on my way Into that critter's hold. "Then came a bump, and then ker chunk! But nothin' couldn't stop us. I knew us I went by that bump it was his epiglottis. At last I hove to In a place that was as dark as night. I sat awhile to catch my wind and get my bearing right. A funny roar was in my ears, like tons of rushln' water; which meant, thought I, we're travel in' much faster than we'd oughter. 1 tried to get upon my feet, but every time I rose that durned fish turned a corner quick and tosod me on my nose. Then when I tried to fool that whale by risn' slow and soft, I'd no more got me half way up when the bloomin' monster coughed. "It throw me, cussln', on my face, and then I feels within my lingers' grasp a bottle that I knew must carry gin! I pulled a match and tallow dip from out my starboard boot, and. lightin' up, sot out to make a search for further loot. And when I takes a careful squint at whore I found the flask, I spies a pair of sandal shoes. Now, sonny, let mo ask: What was them sandals doin' there, in the in wards of that whale? And how about that pint of gin? It plainly showed the tale of Jonah's bein' swallowed by a whale was surely true, and that the whale that swallowed him had taken me in too. "I'm from Missouri when I hear theology expounded, but as for them there Bible tales, I guess that they're well founded. For facts Is facts, and when I'd made another find that day of a pair of pink pajamas labelled with the letter 'J' I knew that Jonah was no fake, but truthful to the core, and that I stood where he had stood ten thousand years before. "I was sittin' feelin' peevish, like a martyr in a pit, when somethin" hap pened sudden and the critter threw a fit. My light went out, and holy smoke! the very next I knew I was shooting through his thorax at a rate I call skldoo. I must have dis agreed with htm the way he chucked me out. I came a-bobbin' through the waves and took a look about. I was tickled when I noticed that my mates was close at hand. They picked mo up and every man just cheered to beat the band. "Now, any one who don't beliove the Jonah story's true can come to me. (Well. I don't mind. I'll have another too)." VOICE AT OWN FUNERAL. Clergyman Makes Phonograph Rec ords for Use at His Grave. Fairfield, 111. The Rev. Daniel Bas Bett Leach, an aged clergyman of Bono Gap, near here, was told that he was going to die. Ho asked that his graphones be brought to his bedside. Into the machine the venerable pas tor talked. Besides an address he epoke some prayers and a benediction. When Mr. Leach had finished he had the records repeated. Then he asked that they be used at his funeral. His relatives assented, and this his relatives, songregatlon nnd friends heard his own voice as they stood bo aldo his grave. .Mr. I m ' v . horn In Chenango County. .V . . TRUTHFUL JON X OR WHALES ALL HIS CHICKS -GET Farmer Discovers Barnyard Speak easy After Roosters Hiccough and Will Give the Gold Cure. Livingston, N. J. Jacob Foos, a farmer of this place, is seeking a gold euro for his chickens. Thirty Ply mouth Hocks in his barnyard have be come Inebriates. A week ago Foos placed an old whis ky barrel, with an end knocked out, In an open space near the henhouse as a shelter for a hen with a brood of little chicks that had been hatched out early. When the sun became hot the hen retired to the barrel with her brood. After a few days Foos ob served that every chicken in his barn yard seemed to bo in a half stupor oven the young chicks. The roosters wont about the yard crowing In a hie coughly way, and the hens clucked in hoarse, guttural tones. Foos was puzzled and ho called In W. F. Merrill, a veterinarian, who In spected the coops and found nothing wrong. Then he examined the bar rel. One snllT at the air of the inter ior enlightened him. "The chickens are drunk," Merrill said. Then ho explained to Foos that the whiskey barrel, which had been In a damp cellar all winter, had been affected by the sun, which brought the alcohol out of the wood. The hen that picked nt the wood first must have communicated the secret to the other fowl, and all became visitors to the barnyard "speak-easy." Foos thought an easy solution of the difficulty would be to burn tho whiskey barrel. This ho did, but the craving for drink had become too strong in the chickens. An old roost er, with the Instinct of a confirmed toper, found his way to an Improvised silo where Foos kept a supply of malt which he buys from a brewery to feed his cattle. This proved a substitute for the whisky barrel, and soon all the chickens were clustered about the silo, devouring the malt. Foos has shut the chickens off from their new form of dissipation, but fears that un less he breaks them of the habit they will wander off the farm In quest of strong drink. LEADER OF THE HOUSE INSURGENTS 1 VICTOR MURDOCK, OF KANSAS. Representative Victor Murdock, of Kansas, who led the onslaught of the Republicans In Congress against the Iron rule of Speaker Joe Cannon, has arrived at fame and is now in great demand throughout the country as a speaker and lecturer. HAMMER SAVES A MAN'S EYE. Doctor Uses Its Magnetic Property to Draw Out a Steel Splinter. St Louis, Mo. Armed only with a 10-cent tack hammer, Dr. G. C. Eggers of Clayton performed an extremely delicate surgical operation that saved for George Schmieder the sight of one of his eyes. A steel splinter an eighth of an Inch long was removed from tho affected optic. Dr. Eggers skimmed over the surface of the eyeball with the blunt end of the hammer. This skimming operation was continued without cessation for nearly half an hour. Suddenly the sufferer felt twings of pain. "You've got It, doctor," he exclaim ed Joyfully. On the hammer's end clung the steel splinter, drawn from the tissue o( the eye by the magnetized head of the hammer. FAMOUS TREE IS HURT. Michael Angelo's Cypress, 350 Years Old, Injured by Storm. Rome, Italy. A terrific storm broke over Rome, doing considerable dam age to property and causing the death of one person. The roof of tho railroad station was partially destroyed. A portion of the roof, In falling, tore off the top of thf Michael Angelo cypress In the cour of the Church of Santa Maria Angel I. ThU tree Is supposed to have beo plantod three hundred and fifty yon. ago by tho famous sculptor and or whoso name It bears. if I ) PLANNING TO MEET ATTACK England Seriously Discusses the Need of Surface Defenses in Modern Warfare MAKES CALL ON THE WRIGHTS Negotiations Opened with American Inventors for an Aerial Fleet Col. Stone Outlines Battles of Future Air Strategists to Attack by Night. London. That Great Britain Is al ready disturbed over the condition of Its surface defenses and is awakening to tho possibility of attack by airships is demonstrated by the wide publicity i and very serious attention being given i the discussion of aerial warfare which i took place a few days ago at the Royal United Service Institution. The occasion was a lecture by Col. F. G. Stone, followed by comment by a number of the most eminent military and naval authorities. Col. Stone's lecture was severely scientific, but In e'"ect was Immensely impressive. He spoke of raids by aerial squadrons of dirigible balloons, reconnoitring the coasts by day and by night, dropping destruction in the shape of bombs upon ships, harbors, ports, and cities, and he drew nn extraordinary picture of a battlefield in the next great war a battlefield In the air, Illuminated, not by searchlights here and there, but all ablaze with every species of illumination. He pointed out that no existing batteries could hope to reach airships on the move only when they hovered over the object of their at tack would they offer a target for high-angle batteries. He conceived that airships would attack by night, and that the defense would try to blind the navigators with the glare of Innumerable lights. The ships would manoeuvre in the semi darkness on the edge of the shining battlefield; then dash into the illumi nation, drop their death, and endeav or to escape. It would be found that surface artillery would be well-nigh impotent. If a balloon were hit it was hardly to be expected that the shell would burst, and the envelope would stand much laceration without collapsing. The only defense would be by lleets of smart, nimble aero planes capable of soaring to battle on even terms in tho sky area. This a few years ago could have been only a chapter out of an H. G. Wolls romance. The fact that It was discussed by cool, unimaginative, scientific officials and military ollicers as a matter of course has created a profound impression throughout Eng land. Mr. Huldnne, tho War Minister, lins stated in Parliament that the War Oillce was opening negotiations with private inventors for the ne qi.isition of military aeroplanes. His reference was to the Messrs. Wright, arrangements being made for Orvillo to come to England. WILD CAT'S HARD FIGHT. Does not Walt, but Charges, Bringing on a General Engagement. Chippewa Falls, Wis. Learning what an unusually large wild cat had boon seen in Rusk County, Otto and Walter Schroebor, of Ladysmith, with throe hounds, set out to make a cap ture. Otto, Willi the hounds, was trailing the cat, when Walter, stationed on a log, saw the animal coming right at him. He had a double-barrelled shot gun loaded with buckshot, and in ills excitement he discharged both of the barrels at once. Tho recoil knocked him off tho log, and he landed on his back. Before he could get to his foot the cat was upon him and a desperate light ensued. In clubbing at the eat with his gun the stock and barrel parted. He next bo labored the cat with the barrel until the dogs came up and then the cat turned its attention to the canines. Cat and dogs rolled and tumbled, spit ting, growling and yelping. The men watched their opportunity and witn a few woll-dlrected blows despatched the cat. The dogs were badly injured as the result of the fight. The men escaped with only torn clothes. The cat weighed fifty six pounds, and was one of the largest ever killed in this section. GENERAL BOOTH IS EIGHTY GEN. BOOTH. Drawn from His Latest Photograph. General William Booth, founder, head and commander of the Salvation Army, was eighty years old on April 10. The celebration of his Birthday was observed In fifty-four countries and colonies and In twenty-eight I. in guages. There were ceremonies t mark that day In Lapland, A!.v. New Zealand, New South Wales, .1 . and under the Equator. 1 THE HIGHER LIFE H SJitKd Gom cJ Thxitht (rem Pra od Pnfed 3 cl AD Stc. Trustful Proml'St's. They that wait upon Jehovah shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall walk and not faint Rev-. F. Willis, Reformed. Promises of Faith. Faith! Openness to God. Friend ship with Christ. The presence of the host and highest In this world nnd In the world to come. Oh, go out renewed In faith and be over cotficrs through tho power of the grace of God. Rov. D. W. Hillis, Methodist. Present Life Is but n moment. "Paul'sground of rejoicing was the Inward man. Day by day he was being renewed. And why should ho not make this the ground of his re joicing? Wo confess that tho pre sent life is but for the moment; that the tabernacle which we now Inhabit is passing away and that we must shortly loavo all earthly possessions. Regulating Our Live. Everything In our lifo from the pontiles In our purse to tho friend ships of our heart, may hn eoiivivt"d Into a psalniof praise. Indeed, it la doubtful if we are properly thanl- fill If our possessions nnd our ncttoti.i do not. exemplify the grateful words which our lips utter. Rev. D W. Anderson, Baptist. Overcoming Evil. Ood is a God of love, full of 'lov ing kindness and tender mercy, and his compassions fail not, but aro new every morning.' He is 'long-suffering, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.' 'Turn, ye, turn, ye, from your evil ways, for why will you die, O house of Israel?' Rev. Wallace Smith, Episcopal. Blaming Ourselves. We all have a tendency to desire that we may see the result of our lives, and have the satisfaction that we have not lived In vain. But, more and more as we see the un speakable depth and breadth of the world's sin, and the little that is done to stem the torrent of Iniquity, the more we aro dissatisfied with ourselves, and Inclined to think that we have lived In vain. Rev. M. Strykor. Methodist. Cause of our Sorrow. "Man, an alien from his loving father-God, has wrongly and unjust ly accused God of sending all the sorrow of the world. Goldsmith was wrong 'In all my griefs, and God has given my share'; Tennyson was wrong 'My God has bowed mo down to what I am.' God Is not re sponsible for all that happens. God Is not the author or sender of sorrow and suffering. God does not inllict punishment for sin here. All tho punishment for sin v. as that ondured on the cross by the Saviour, who suffered that we might not suffer. God does not stand with sword in hand to cut and slash with torch to burn. Rov. E. M. Luke, Unitarian. Laws of God. God's laws aro natural state ments, of the orderly conditions of things In nature and spiritual; necessary and inexorable, otherwise Hie would be intolerable tho world frightful chaos making impossible any plan, any material, intellectual or hpiritual progress, leaving anar chy tho only alternative. God Is the same 'yesterday, to-day and forever.' his laws unchanging and unchangeable. In his plan tharo was no place for catastrophe no cause for suffering no Intension of death; but broken himself against his (ory law. Those laws cannot bt changed but man must change his relation to them. Rov. Wallace Smith. iK-erios a Xon-K-Hcliin-c God. The prophet Habakkuk, pro nounced woes on those who wore covetous, and dishonest, and proud, and bloodthirsty, and drunken and Idolatrous. In the eyes cf the .-.oule monotheism of tho Hebrow prophets Idolatory ww a sin to bo ranked and ..used with other sins. 'Shall It teach? this 'wood' or 'dumb stone'? Though It be 'laid with gold and sil ver,' shall it awako? Shall It arise? bhall it teach? This was the pr phet s challenge and test. A God that is worth anything should teach. If he cannot teach he 1? worthless. This was the Hebrow Idea, and such It is a noble scorn that Habakkuk hurls at the non-teaching gods. Rev H. Tupper, Baptist. ' Apple on the Berry Bush. To those particularly Interested in the growing of apple an experiment made at Delta, Idaho, will be of value. In the Spring of last year Thomas and Francis Hauch, two miners, who keep a garden and grow strawberries and vegetables, experimented In grafting a scion of a four-year-old-apple tree in to a service berry tree body, and to their delight the limb not only grew but blossomed this year and two well developed yellow apples ripened. The tree from which the scion was cut has never bloomed, yet the scion when grafted into a berry bush blossomed and bore fruit the next year. La Grande Obserrer. To Protect Ilard Wood Floors. To protect hardwood floors from scratches, fit corrugated rubber to bottom ol tables and chairs, fasten with strong glue. These lips are in visible. ,, , . INTERNATIONAL NEWSPAPER BIBLE STUDY CLUB. Answer One Written Question Each Week For ' Fifty-Two Weeks and Win a Prize. THE PRIZES. First 8erles A gold msdal to each of the first five contestants. Second Series A silver medal to each of the next five contestants. Third Series A Teachtr's Bible, price $5.50, to each of the next five contestants. Fourth Series The book "The Heart of Christianity," price $1.50, to each of the next "thirty-five contestants. Fifth Series A developed mind, an expanded Imagination, a richer exper ience and a more profound knowledge of the Bible and of life, to all who take this course whether winning any other prize or not. Each medal will be suitably engrav ed, giving the name of the winner, and for what It Is awarded, and In like manner each Bible and book will be inscribed. All who can write, and have ideas, are urged to take up these studies re gardless of the degree of their educa tion, as the papers are not valued from an educational or literary standpoint, but from the point of view of the cog incy of their reasoned ideas. June 6th, isua. (Copyrlplil. 1pni, l,v Hcv. T. S. T.lni-ott D D The Power of tho Tongue. .Tames 111:112. Golden Text Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles. Prov. 21:23. This chapter continues the thought of last week's lesson, based on the previous chapter. Verse 1 What class of persons are most likely to want to rule, or be "masters," .ose engaged in good works or those who neglect them? Will one who Is In rapt love with his fellows want to rule them, or will he Judge them harshly? Unfaithful Christians always put up a high standard for others; what ef fect will that have upon the standard with which God will measure them? (See Matt. 7:1-5.) Verse 2 How much of our trouble and how much of the trouble we make for others Is caused by our tongues? If a man does not do any harm by his words. Is he very apt to do any otherwise? If a man says hard and unkind things about his neighbors, and in tentionally wounds the feelings of others by his words, Is he necessarily a bad man? Is the control of the tongue the key to tho control of the entire man? Verse " It takes an Iron bit to con trol a horse, what Is the "bit" which will effectually control the tongue? In what respect is an ungoverned tonc;ue like a runaway horse with a broken bit, and what are generally the results in each case? (This question must be answered In writing by mem bers of the club.) Verses -1-5 Is It actually so, that the tongue is to tho man what the nulder is to the ship, that Is, does the tongue govern the Influence of tho man? Is it nocepsary at all times to watch our tongues, compelling them to re frain from wrong words, and to use right words; just as the man at the wheel of a ship controls tho rudder with vigilant watchfulness? Is tho tongue capable of setting a church or a neighborhood all ablaze with scandal, just as a match may set fire to a city? Vorse 0 What are some of the many "iniquities" which the tongue can cause? Can you recall and mention some of the moral poison emitted by an evil tongue? Do persons with an evil tongue al ways dray their Inspiration from "hell?" Verses 7-8 Man can do very won derful things, In training animals and controlling the forces of nature, but cannot "taine" the human tongue, nor destroy Us poison; to whom may we apply to have this effectually done? Verses 9-12 If a man uses his tongue both for bad and for good, for "blessing and cursing," does this not stamp him as a rank hypocrite? Is It possible for a person with an evil tongue, to be at tho same timo well pleasing ts God? Lesson for ?5nday, Juno 13th, 1909. Heroes of Faith. Heb. 11:1-40. BIBLE HOUSE MISDRAWN. Excavations in Galilee Show Rooms Unlike Artists' Ideas. Berlin. German archaeologists ex cavating In Galilee came upon a hill or large 'mound under which they found the fairly well preserved walls of a house dating from the time of Christ which belonged to the dwelling of a well-to-do man. A large outhouse also unearthed contained jars which evidently had contained wine and olive oil. The foundations of the house are so well preserved that there will be no difficulty in making the exact plan of the rooms, which aro similar In character and design to those in which the famous supper of Cana In Galilee took place. These rooms are wholly unlike the conception of Leonardo da Vinci and other painters, who have treated this subject. The room in which the wa ter was turned into wine probably was not more than twenty feet long by ten wide and had a low roof. There were stone benches around the walls and a recess In the wall facing the east, in which perhaps the giver of the feast sat. REPORT OF THE CONDITION OF The Farmers' and Mechanics' Bank OF llONESDAI.E, WAYNE COUNTY. PA at the close of business, April a. loot). HKSOUIiCES. Reserve fund Cash, specie nnd notes, $8,42a tfj Due from approved re serve agents $15,801 87 f peeks and other cash Items...... U77 ! H s discounted, not due 55 519 m Mils discounted, tlmu loans with r collateral 21 000 no Loans 011 call with collateral sW 00 Loans upon call upon one or mure . names in 1111 no Loans secured by bonds and mo'rt- ' gages 13 sod 00 Investment securities owned eic'lii- ' slveof reserve bonds, viz.... Stocks, bonds, etc tinam Yl .Mortgages und Jndg- ,..,, n'i;!!ir. 01 rw,ml L'5 m-:a.rM : ileal estate iHKwinA Furniture and fixtures . . . Tsui 41 Overdrafts 3 go $ L'lLMO 41 I.I.UIII.ITIICS. Capital Stock paid In mcM 00 Surplus Fund Si ho I iidlvldcd Profits, less expenses , and taxes paid . ). it. epos ts. subject to clieek. M Deposits, special lL'u.m.' 3.H(,(i56 K7 c. .... . nn:m 41 state of Pennsylvania, County of Wayne, rs : I. C. A. Emery. Cashier of the above named company, do solemnly swear tl a lie I ve and heffef. '" tl,U '"-'St f k'" C. A. EMERY. Cashier. a:f "or!:'1!:1 swo,n 10 -'" ti.i iM Correct attest: ItKXA S. Upturn", N, 1'. M. E. Simons. ) .1ohnK. Kba.ntz. Directors. . W l. 8km. I We have no Insurance against panics, BUT We want to sell Every business man in Wayne county a good sized life or en dowment policy that he may use as collateral security for borrowed money-tldeyouover tight places when sales are poor and collections slow-possibly head off Insolvency. We want to sell Every farmer a policy that will absolutely protect his family and home. We want to sell Every laborer and mechanic a savins: policy that will he m pqssiblo tor him to lapse or lose. If not L,!fe Insurance I.et us write someof yourFIRE INSURANCE-. Standard, re liable companies only. IT IS BETTER TO DO IT NOW, THAN TO WAIT AND SAY " F" HiTTINGER & HAM, General Agents. WHITE MILLS, PA. "VrOTICE IS HEREBY (HVEN that the 1 undersigned, a registered student at aw in the (illli e or Henry Wilson. Ksii.. of the Wayne ; county bar. and a student in rk Inson Law j-chool, will make applir ' ion to the state Board of Law Examiners, to e examined on the tltlt ami 7th days of July, l!Hl!i. lor admission to the bar of the Supreme .,,ur " cmisylvania.aml to the bar of the ( on it of Common Pleas of Wayne coiintv ,, . . CMESTEIt A. (iAIMtATT. Iloiiesdale. Pa. .May 2 WOK. jowl Court of Co mo P V 'W- " J I , ' 11 111 I 'I'llllVV ! tl I fill,) 41... I 41. ,, , , CIIAKI.ES p. SUAKllK. lioiiesdale. Pa.. Mav 17 VML 40t4 VTOTIOE OF ADMINISTRATION, 1' K STATE OK IIAIIVEY X. FARLEY, late of Buckingham .,, township. All persons indebted to said estate are not! lied to make Immediate payment to the un dersigned : and tho.su havim; claims against the said estate are notilled to present them duly attested, for settlement. ,. , , .JOSEPH W. FAIU.EY.Adm. Kiiulnunk. Pa., April, im. :J3wli rTICE OF ADMINISTRATION, ESTATE OK , .SARAH A. (iUOMMC'Il. late of the township of Lake, Pa. A ll persons Indebted to said estate are notl lied to make immediate payment to tho un dersigned : and those bavins claims against the said estate are untitled to present them duly attested for settlement. . , , J.lI.'ltO.MLK'H. Administrator, Ariel, Pa., April 12, lUOil. 30 If you don't insure with us, we both lose. General Insurance White Mills Pa. For New Late Novelties -IN YfOTU'E IS HEREBY HI VEX that the mmuiMgiieu, a registered student at law In the ollieeot A. T. Searle, Esq., of the ii,;!Jst1.l,'i1i.',r!!'1,t'1lurr, wl" ,m!lk,,1 "PPlieation to ,Ktl11' l!(';ln 'r l-aw Examiners, to be ex amined on the f.tli and 7th days of July, 1!W!) 'Tor!' !r"iY,l,m 'V I,,,r, "f tll(! K"lrenm JEWELRY SILVERWARE WATCHES Try SPENCER, TheiJeweler "Ouarnnteed articles only sold "
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers