Montour American FRANK C. ANCILE, Proprietor. Llanville, Pa., Feb. 17, 1910. STANLEY AS A FIGHTER. His Revenge on the Africans For At tacking His Forces. In the following language Sir Henry M. Stanley describes an attack of na tives upon Ills party during one of his African expeditious: "The leviathan bears down on us with racing speed, Its consorts on either flank spurting the water into foam and shooting up Jets with their sharp prows. A thrill ing chant from 2,000 throats rises louder and louder on our hearing. Presently the poised spears are launched, and a second later tny rifles respond with a ripping, crackling ex plosion, and the dark bodies of the ca noes and paddlers rush past us. "For a short time the savages are paralyzed, but they soon recover. They find there is death in those flaming tubes in the hands of the strangers, and with possibly greater energy than they advanced they retreat, the pur sued becoming the pursuers in hot chase. My blocd is up. It is a mur derous world, and 1 have begun to hate the filthy, vulturous shoals who Inhabit it. "I pursue them upstream, up to their villages. 1 skirmish in their streets, drive them pellmell into the woods be yond and level their ivory temples. With frantic haste I fire their huts and end the scene by towing their ca noes into midstream and setting them adrift." RAVENOUS EATERS. Gluttony of Soiiman and the Appetite of Louis XIV. Touching the matter of eating, the stories told by the old chroniclers and historians of the abnormal appetites of certain Roman and oriental men of note fairly stagger belief. Gibbon tells of Soiiman, a caliph in the eighth century, who died of acute indigestion In his camp near Chalcis, in Syria, just as ho was about to lead an army of Arabs against Constantino ple. lie had emptied two baskets of eggs and figs, which ho swallowed alternately, and the repast was finish ed with marrow and sugar, in a pil grimage to Mecca the same caliph had eaten with impunity at a single meal seventy pomegranates, a kid, six fowls and a huge quantity of the grapes of Toy of. Such a statement would defy belief were not others of a similar character well avouched. Louis XIV. could hard ly boast of an appetite as ravenous as Soliman's, but he would eat at a sit ting four platefuls of different soups, a whole pheasant, a partridge, a plate ful of salad, mutton hashed with gar lic, two good sized slices of ham, a dish of pastry and finish this ample repast with fruit and sweetmeats.— London Saturday Review. Victorian Gods. If Thackeray, with a brain weighing llfty-eight and one-half ounces, had the biggest head among Victorian writ ers who had the best features? The Choice would seem to lie between Ten nyson and Henry Taylor. "That man must be a poet," remarked oue of his Cambridge contemporaries when ho flrst saw Tennyson come into the hall at Trinity, and another friend de scribes him in his undergraduate days as six feet high, broad chested, strong limbed, his face Shakespearean, with • deep eyelids; his forehead ample, crowned with dark wavy hair; his head finely poised, his hand the admi ration of sculptors. But time dealt none too gently with Tennyson, where as Henry Taylor, always a distin guished looking man. seems to have grown singularly majestic with years. Grant Duff, meeting him when lie was over eighty, notes that "Taylor looks more like Jupiter than ever," and con temporary memoirs are full of refer ences to his Jove-like appearance.— London Standard. No Chance In History. Mazzini said that he did not believe that chance existed in history. "A cause must necessarily underlie every event, although for the moment it may appear as the result of apparently ac cidental circumstances. An Alexander, a Caesar, a Napoleon, are not the re sults of accident, but the inevitable product of the time and nation from which they spring, it was not Caesar who destroyed the Roman republic. The republic was dead before Caesar came. Sulla, Marias, Catiline, preced ed and foreshadowed Caesar, but he, gifted with keener insight and greater genius, snatched the power from them and concentrated it In his owu hands. For there was no doubt that he was fitter to rule than all the others put together. At the same time, supposiug he had appeared 150 years earlier, he would not have succeeded in destroy ing the republic. When he came the life hod already gone out of It, and even Caesar's death could not restore that." i WWWWBHWMWWIIXI R-T-PA-N-S Tabule Doctors find A good prescription For Mankind. The 5-cent packet is euough for tisua ooeassions. The familyybottle (110 cents contains a supply {for a year. Alhdrng gists. I WINDSOR HOTEL) I W.T. IUUBAKER. Manager. M Midway between Hroatl St. Station JE and Reading Terminal on Filbert St H European, SI.OO per day and up I American, $2.50 per day and up I The only moderate priced hotel of I reputation and consequence in PHILADELPHIA RETURNS FROM COUNTRY DISTRICTS Continued from Ist Page. ASSESSOR. George W. Heimbaeh, R.... 17 Jacob M. Sliultz, D 84 AUDITC >R. Stewart Hartman, It 35 Edward Cashner, D 38 JUDGE OF ELECTION. James Pursel, It 34 Albert Blecher, D 30 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. Arthur Foust, R . . .19 Hurley Ootuer, D 33 Liberty Township. SUPERVISOR. Samuel Wagner, R 45 J. D. Cotner, D 43 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. George Springer, R 41 Henry Roat, R 30 William Startler, D 50 13. F. Messersmitli, D 5(5 OVERSEER OF THE^POOR. James Poresman, R 34 Joseph Hagenbuch, D 58 ASSESSOR. Charles E. Hover, It 44 William J. Leidy, D 43 AUDITOR. Robert Simington, It 3!) Thomas VanSant, D 44 JUDGE OF ELECTION. Arthur Clewell, It 33 John MeWilliams, D 51 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. Willard Pannebaker, It 34 Andrew Billmeyer, D 4!> Limestone Township. SUPERVISOR. J. C. Fouik, R 33 J. C. Foillk, D 34 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. William E. Bogart, R 37 Charles Leech, R 33 H. K. Wagner, D 34 S. F. Wellman, D 38 OVERSEER OF THE POOR. John Anderson, R 38 W. E. Geiger, D.,.. 40 ASSESSOR. John Ashenfelder, It 33 John Ashenfelder, D 34 AUDITOR. John Zaner, It 34 Elmer Fonlk, D 45 TAX RECEIVER. J. Miles Derr, It 4-1 C. D. Levan, D .... 3(5 JUSTICE OF THE PEACE. Daniel W. Rank, 1t.... 34 Daniel W. Rank, D 28 JUDGE OF ELECTION. Calvin W. Derr, It 31) John O. Lilly, D 33 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. George W. Kreiger, R 29 George Van Nostrand, D 40 Anthony Township. SUPER VISt >lt. Alfred Hitler, it <V3 George Dietrich, D 85 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. P. O. Dennin, It 4(1 Allan Watson, It 43 P. C. Dennin, i) 08 Allan Watson, D <l3 OVERSEER OF THE POOR. Samuel Snyder, 1t.... 34 Samuel Snyder, D 83 ASSESSOR. William If. Dihline, It 41 William 11. Dildine, D .. 74 ,T. A. Whipple, Ind 15 AUDITOR. George Bart low, D 106 JUSTICE OF THE PEACE. David Smith, R 4C> Samuel Dewalt, I> 7(5 TOWN CLERK. Sylvester Pursel, It .33 W. C. Houghton, D 75 JUDGE OF ELECTION. Miles Holdren, It 33 W. It. Adams, D 92 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. George Johnson, It . 48 John Yagel, I) DO Mahoning Township. SUPERVISOR. Alfred Diehl, It 53 James Morrison. D (57 SCHOOLJDIR ECTOR. Harry G. Miller, It 44 Lloyd Baylor, It (50 Charles Rudy, D (50 William Dyer, D.. (5(5 ASSESSOR. Fred W. Diehl, it 57 Alfred Mellin, D 59 AUDITOR. Samuel Krnm, D 88 TAX RECEIVER. E. 1,. White, It 3 Charles Uttermi ller 1) 72 A Reliable Remedy CATARRH J&ISh Ely's Cream Balm y tVER is quickly absorbed. Gives Rcliel at Once. It cleansi M heals ami protects the disonseif mem brane resulting from Catarrh and drives away aCold in tin-Head quickly. Restores the S< uses of Taste and Smell. Full size 50 ets. at Druggists or by mail. Liquid Cream Balm for use in atomizers 75 ets. Elv ltrntlinra M U'.mn Kl».l V..vi* JUDGE OF ELECTION. Michael P. Scott, R 58 Harry Balliot, D 69 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. William 15. Housor, R 30 Roy Gas Ds 84 Mayberry Township. SUPERVISOR. George W. Fox, R 13 Joseph W. Goarhart, 0 18 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. George W. Fox, R 18 Peter S. Cromley, R 18 Rufus E. Bird, D 11 J. M. Vought, D 13 OVERSEER OF THE POOR. J. W. Vastine, R 24 lasao Adams, D 7 AUDITOR. W. H. Fahriuger, R 15 Henry G. Boiiner, D 11l JUDGE OF ELECTION. Chris Vought, It 22 D. H. Vought, D 11 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. Claude Unger, R 13 Norman E. Brofee, D 19 VALLEY TOWNSHIP SUPERVISOR. W. K. Davis, R 11l E. D. Williams, D 33 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. Charles Lewis, R 75 Eilas Williams, R . 110 Joseph P. Snyder, D. 04 ,T. A. Conway, D 58 THE POOR. W. D. Wise, R (59 W. D. Wise, D (12 ASSESSOR. Adam Beyer, R 56 Adam Beyer, D OH AUDITOR. Frank Hendricks, li 45 John Crossley, D 97 JUDGE OFfELECTION. William Cope, It 14 B. C. Hendrickson, D 03 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. Joseph Chrum, R.... 73 Pierce Gearhart, D Oil West Hemlock Township. SUPERVISOR. Hiram C. Cromley, 11 ...20 W. B. Moore, D 35 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. Charles A. Arnwine, 1t....29 William T. Gething, R 34 Joseph 11. Wintersteen, D 32 William Snyder, D .. 20 ASSESSOR. C. C. Styer, It .. 13 C. J. Deightmiller, D 38 OVERSEER OK THE POOR. 11. C. Sandel, It ..... 18 N. O. Reichard, D 33 AUDITOR. Albert Hartmau, It 15 Chester T. Balliet, D ;10 JUSTICE OF THE PEACE. C. F. Styer, It 25 D. F. Crossley, D 35 JUDGE OF ELECTION. Matthew Maus, It 30 Charles C. Sterling, D .34 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. J. Biaino Hartman, It 30 John H. Tanner, 1) . . 3s Washingtonville. BURGESS. T. B. Yerg, 1t..10 T. B. Yerg, 1) 32 COU N OILMEN. Jesse Kelly, it. :i yrs 38 Elmer Cotner, it, 8 yis 34 Kent Butler, It, 3 yrs 35 C. Heckendorn, D, 3 yrs ~17 William V. Cooper, D, ;i yrs 33 Isaac Moser, D, 3 yrs 3(1 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. Burgess Heacock, It 38 George Holdren, It 35 ami si! A R.ellable TO SHOP for nil kind of Tin Roofing Spoutlne rtnd C«n«ral Jolt Work. Stoves, Heaters, Ranees, Furnaces. «to. PRICES THE LOWEST! QUJLITY TDE BEST) JOHN HlXSOrt MQ. 110 E. FBQNT IT, 60 YEARS' H V l JJ" L J m lßn kI ■ 1 DESIGNS COPYRIGHTS AC. Anyone sending n skotch and description may quickly ascertain our nt'inUm free whether au Invention Is probably patentable. Communlca tloniHtrlctly confidential. HANDBOOK on Patent* sont freo. oldest agency fur n«eurnitf patents. I'ntents taken through Munn & Co. receive tpecial noticf, without charge. In the Scientific American. A handsomely Illustrated weekly. T .unrest clr dilation of any scientific Journal. Terms. $3 a year : four months, fI. Sold by all newHdealcrs. MUNN &C 0 .36, 8'- New York Braucb Office. C 26 F 8t„ Washington. D. C. H. P. Cotner, D 13 Charles W. Heffiier, D 14 ASSESSOR. Ralph Seidel, R 29 George W. Miller, D 22 AUDITOR. F. B. Seidel, R ID William Seidel, D 28 TAX RECIVER. C. L. Cromis, R 19 Daniel Wagner, D 29 HIGH CONSTABLE. John R. Miller, R 17 John R. Miller, D 26 CONSTABLE. McClellau Dehl, D 38 JUDGE OF ELECTION. Frank Maitz, D 43 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. W. F. Zeliff, Ii 14 Henry Manser, D 15 Frank Seidel, Inil 21 SOUTH SIDE Tuesday's elections in South Dan ville and Riverside resulted in the polling of about a normal February vote. The results furnished several close finishes. In Riverside the vote between John Keim, Republican, and William Orr, Democrat, for school di rector is a tie. South Danville. SUEPItVISOR. J. H. Kaso, D 11 Dr. N. M. Smith, Ind 39 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. •Tames C. Carr, Ii ... 41 Elias Woodruff, R .. . 22 Wallace A. Hoover, D ... 53 M. L. Hummer, D 35 OVERSEER OF THE POOR. H. C. Kase, It 31 Peter J. Bcrger, D 44 ASSESSOR. Peter G. Baylor, R 40 A. J. Bird, D 39 AUDITOR. Arthur Campbell, D ~..(il JUDGE OF ELECTION. Walter G. Eekman, Ii 37 James Campbell, D 40 INSPECTOR. Elmer Mowrey, R .27 Grier L. Shu It z, D 49 Riverside. COUNCIL. Benjamin Fry, R 20 S. W. Morrall, R 22 Warren Cuthbert, D 34 C. A. Riff el D 32 SCHOOL DIRECTOR. John Keim, Ii 33 William Orr, 11 33 OVERSEER OF THE POOR. John Conway, R .12 H. F. Shultz, D 40 AUDITOR Ralph Shannon, R 29 Ivason Confer, D 24 JUDGE OF ELECTION. John M. Hinckley, R 2« Charles E. Mills," D 38 INSPECTOR OF ELECTION. Joseph Reed, li . . .... 31 Solon: on M. Yeager, D 33 She Was the Uhost. "A certain lady and her family," unvs sir Mountstuart Grant-Duff in "Diary." "hired a place in Scot land which was haunted by the ghost of a woman who was to be seen con stantly at night wandering through the rooms and passages. When the family arrived the lady was much struck with the place and said, '1 must have been here before, for I know this place so well, only there ought to be two rooms here, and there is only me.' "The agent replied that within n few weeks the owner had caused a parti tion to be taken down and made the two rooms into one. Still the lady was puzzled at her knowledge of the place till she remembered that it was a house she used t<> goto in her dreams. "Well, some time passed, aud the agent was up at the house again, when the lady complained that one part of the contract had not been fulfilled. They had hired a house and a ghost for the summer, and no ghost had she seen. The agent replied: 'Of course not. because you are the ghost. We recoguized you the moment we saw you.' " $3.50 Receipe Cures Weak Kidneyr, Free Reliever Urinary and Kidney Troubles, Backache, Straining, Swell ing, Etc. Stops Pain in the Bladder, Kid. neys and Back. Wouldn't it be nice witihn a week or so to begin to say good bye forever to the scalding, dribbling, straining, or too frequent passage of urine; the forehead and the back-of-the-head aches; the stitches aud pains in the back; the growing muscle weakness; spots before the eyes; yellow skin; sluggish bowels; swollen eyelids or ankles; leg cranps; unnatural short breath; slepelcssness and the ilespond enov? I have a recipe for these troubels that you can depend on, and if you want to make a quick recovery, you ought to write anil get a copy of it. Many a doctor would charge you $3.50 just for writing this prescription, but I have it and will be glad to send it to you entirely free. Just drop me a line like this: Dr. A. E. Robinson,k4sß Luck Building, Detroit, Mich., and I will send it by return mail in a plain envelope. As you will see when you get it.this recipe contains only pure, harmless remedies, but it has great healing and pain-conquering power. It will quickly show its power once you use it, so I think you had better see what it. is without delay. 1 will send you a copy free—you can use it and cure yourself at home. SHERIFFS SALE! OF VALUABLE REAL ESTATE ! By virtue of a certain writ of Le vari Facias, issued out of the Court of Common Pleas of Montour County, to me directed, will expose to Public Sale or Outcry, on Saturday, March sth, 1910, at. 10:00 o'clock in the forenoon at the Court House, the following described Real Estate: All that certain messuage and tract of land situate partly in the Town ships of Cooper, Mahoning, Valley and West Hemlock in the County of Montour anil State of Pennsylvania, less the tracts hereinafter described and sold therefrom, Beginning at a stone corner of land now or formerly of Jacob Rudy, thence by the said land now or formerly of the said Jac ob Rudy North eighty-five degrees East twenty-three and five-tenths perches to a stone, thence North sev enty-five degrees East ten and five tenths perches to a white oak grub, thence by land now or formerly of Henry Buss, North seven degrees West one hundred and twenty-two perches to a post, thence by lands now or for merly of Cornelius Still and Samuel R. Wood West two hundred and thir ty-nine perches to a post, thence by land now or formerly of Andrew Overpeck, South twenty-one degrees East one hundred and forty-nine per ches to a stone, thence by land now or formerly of John Cashner, South five degrees West twenty-eight perches to a post, thence by land now or former ly of Cornelius Still, South twentv-one degrees East fifty-eight and eight tenths perches to a post, thence In land now or formerly of Peter Baldy North seventy-five degrees East one hundred and thirty-nine anil four- | tenths perches to a" pole, thence by land now or formerly of Jacob Rudy North forty-six degrees East fitty three and five-tenths perches to the place of beginning. Containing Two Hundred and Sixteen Acres and One | hundred and Forty-Eight Perches and ' allowance, excepting and reserving the following described pieces and 1 parcels of land. No. 1. Beginning at a white oak ! corner of land of John Fern and Jere miah Donovan, thence North seven teen degrees West forty-three perches 1 to a stone in line of land of James V. Gillaspy, thence along line of lands j of said James V. Gillaspy South eighty-nine degrees East twenty-eight anil five-tenths perches to a stone in line of lands formerly of Grove Broth ers, thence along said last mentioned land South sixteen and one-half de grees East thirty-six and sixty-five one-hundredth* perches to a stone in line of land of .John F. Fern, thence along said last mentioned land South seventy-eight and one-fourth degrees West twenty-six and nine-tenths perch es to a white oak the place of begin ning. Containing Six Acres and One j Hundred and Nine Perches, more or less. No. 2. Beginning at a stone in the public road at corner of land of said | Catherine E. Fern anil Baldy and I Frick, thence North seventy-eight and one-half degrees East sixteen and one- ' tenth peiches to a stone in a public road corner of lauds of said Biddy and j Frick anil Grove Brothers, thence 1 North thirteen and one-half degrees East twenty-one perches to a post and ' stone in said public road corner of , lands of said Grove Brothers, thence j South seventy-eight degrees West | twenty-six and nine-tenths perches to lands of said Catherine E. Fern and J the said Grove Brothers, thence South | by the same seventeen and one-fourth degrees East eighteen and eight-tenths perches to the place of beginning. Containing Two Acres and Eighty l'our Perches strict measure. No. :S. Beginning at a stone in line of lands of James V. Gillaspy North I seventy-two and one-halt degrees Enst nine and one-tenth perches to a stone in liii" of lands of Grove Brothers, North twenty-two and three-fourths degrees West twenty-three and five oue-hundredths perches to a stone in line of lands of said (irove Brothers, North eighty-seven and three-fonrthal degrees West seven an 1 four-tenths: perches to a stone, thence South sev enteen and one fourth degrees East twenty-five and four-tenths perches to the place of beginning. Containing 1 Olie Acre and Thirty-four Perches. Upon which are erected a 2-STORY FRAME DWELLING HCUS? a two-story Frame Tenant House, a Bank Barn and other necessary out buildings Three springs of never failing water. Valuable Timber Land, j Seized, taken in execution and to be sold as the property of Jacob Dewald. Pennsylvania Paper Mills, terre tenant. WM. B. STARTZEL, Sheriff. W. V. Oglesby, Attorney. The Widow Was Comforted. "There Is no accounting for the con at ruction which some people will put 1 upon certain passages of Scripture," re- \ marked u clergyman. "I remember , the story of one clergyman who went to call on a woman whose husband j had recently died. He had expected, quite naturally, to find her heartbro- , ken with the burden of her sorrow ' and was greatly surprised when she j greeted him with a very happy smile and ushered lilui Into the parlor. " 'Well—er—sister,' be said at length, 'you have my warmest sympathy.' I " 'Thank you, doctor,' replied the widow casually. 'I did feel very bad, very bad indeed. But I came across a verse of Scripture which com- I I'orted me very much indeed.' " 'And what was the verse, sister?' inquired the clergyman. "'X don't remember just where to find it,' replied the widow, 'but It was made up of only four words—four helpful words—"Why need I care?"'" ' Features For a Sportsmen's Show. ; The management of the first Interna tional sportsmen's exhibition, which ] will take place at Vienna this year, i has secured a series of moving pictures j illustrating a huut meet at which the j Emperor Francis Joseph is the ccn- j tral figure. It is now endeavoring to secure as a companion piece films showing Colonel Roosevelt and hi 3 party hunting big game In Africa, and j a circular says that the pictures will i undoubtedly be procured "and will give visitors to the exhibition the first clear j Idea of hunting in the jungle." To Try Again For South Polo. Lieutenant Ernest 11. Shaekleton, j who has succeeded In getting nearer to the south pole than any other ex plorer, recently nnnouueed that he has I decided upon another antarctic expedi- j tlon. A PADEREWSKI STORY. The Great Musician's First Important Engagement In Paris. i'aderewskl's first really important engagement as a pianist was in Paris, lie was engaged to play in the draw ing room of a lady famous for her mu- 1 Blcales, and his fee, which seemed to him enormous, was S2O. He managed to persuade the humane agent to pay him iu advance, and when Paderew ski had redeemed his dress suit from pawn and paid for shoes, gloves, tie nud other essentials he had no money left for cab hire, so he was forced to ! walk to the scene of his engagement, j The music loving audience inspired i him. He played with feeling, passion and mastery of his instrument as nev- ! er before. Ills success was instant and unmistakable. The poor player had suddenly become the lion of the hour, his dream had become a reality, and fame and fortune were assured him. At last after disengaging himself from his admirers he turned to leave, when his hostess, remembering with regret the smallness of the fee for so marvelous a performance, offered him her carriage for his return home. But I'aderewski's pride came to the rescue. In his courteous yet reserved way he made a formal bow, and, saying, "No, thank you. madame: my own is wait ing," he stepped out for his long walk homeward.—Pearson's Weekly. SCARED THE OLD SAVAGE. Ruse That Saved Dr. Felkin From Kinp Mtesa of Uganda. When the well known African trav elor Dr. Robert Felkin was staying with the bloodthirsty King Mtesa of Uganda many years ago the king, out of gratitude for his visitor's medical treatment, wished to cut off his head. On Dr. Kelkin representing that the treatment was not finished and that if interrupted It would cause Mtesa's death the latter granted him a re prieve until he was quite recovered. Then, however, nothing availed, and the execution was determined upon. Emin Pasha, who was u friend of Dr. Felkin, had Instructed him most accurately about the state of affairs in Uganda and the court of King Mtesa and had revealed to him an important state secret—namely, where Mtesa's powder store was hidden. Dr. Felkin remembered this at the right moment and as a last resort threotoned that if Sltesa killed him he would bringdown a flash of lightning upon his powder store. Mtesa replied Incredulously, "Tell me where it is," whereupon Dr. Felkin whispered In Ills ear. "It Is concealed under your harem." Mtesa turned pale and allowed Fel kin and his companions to live. The "lightning maker's" authority increas ed when next day a flush of llghtnlug happened to strike near the harem. Fooled the Town. University students have long enjoy ed a reputation as practical Jokers, but there has been nothing quite so sue cessful as the famous sultan of Zan zibar hoax of some years ago at Cam bridge. One day the mayor of the town received the following wire from one Henry Lucas, Hotel Cecil, London: "The sultan of Zanzibar will arrive at Camhrldgo at 4:27 for a short visit. Could you arrange to show him build ings of Interest and send carriage?" The mayor rose to the occaslou, and Indue course four dark complexlone.l gentlemen with turbans and volutui nous trousers arrived at Cambridge The mayor and corporation entertain ed them light royally, but to thei chagrin they discovered a few hour later that the Interesting orientals were simply a quartet of undergrad uates who had played an Immense practical Joke upon the town.—London Spectator. The Seat of Punctuation. At the time Colonel Roosevelt was carrying on his simplified spelling movement 'u Washington there was a meeting of educators at Battle Creek. Mich., and they visited the great san itariums there. They were shown through, nnd particular stress was laid by the guide on the success that at tended operations there on enlarged and diseased colons. It being claimed that here was the seat of most dis ease. There was a banquet that night, and one of the visitors opened his speech like this: "Washington, as we all know, is the seat of spelling reform; but. I take it. Battle Creek is bound to be the scat of punctuation reform, for. as we were told today, yon come here with ii colon and you depart with a semicolon."— Saturday E v enlng Post. A Duke at Church. There was a certain old duke who used to sit up In the left hand gallery with his duchess, believing hluiself to be incog. Oue Sunday a too officious steward, ou seeing the old nobleman take a back seat, hurried up to him and said. "Will not your grace have a better seat?" "Come aloug, Maria!" said the old duke. "We're discovered!" And ho immediately walked out with the duch ess nud never showed his face inside the church again.—London Tatler. Gave It Back. Mrs. A. (maliciously)— You were such n charming debutaute, my dear, fif teen years ago. Mrs. B.—Was I? I only remember you made such a love ly chaperon for me when I came out. —Boston Transcript. He Wondered. Indignant Customer—l want to re turn this Jewel box. It's not ivory, tis represented. Doaler (musingly)— Now, I wonder if it can be possible that elephant had false teeth.—Cleve land Leader. Not Coughing Today ? Yet you may cough tomorrow! Better be prepared for it when it comes. Ask your doctor about keeping Ayer's Cherry Pectoral in the house. Then when the hard cold or cough first appears you have a doctor's medicine at hand. Your doctor's approval of its use will certainly set all doubt at rest. Do as he says. He knows. No alcohol in this COUgh medicine. J.C.AyerCo., Lowell, Mass. Robust health is a great safeguard against attacks of throat and l" n & troubles, but constipation will destroy the best of health. Ask your doctor about Ayer s Pills. The Cause of Many Sudden Deail'.g. There is a disease prevailing in this country most dangerous because so decep r~"~i R| | II tive. Many sudden SCaife (iVIEIr Ideaths 1 deaths are cuust il by it—heart <iis- ease, pneumonia, 1 HJ\ * heart failure or 112 apoplexy are often 'N\ \<j| tue result of kid 'A|&g~{rti| I 4 & ney disease. If U \ \\ < kidney trouble is U " allowed to advance * eotyjy tliekidney-poison- Xed blood will at tack the vital organs, causing catarrh ot the bladder, brick-dust or sediment in the urine, head ache, back ache, lame back, dizziness, sleeplessness, nervous ness, or the kidneys themselves break down and waste away cell by cell. Bladder troubles almost always result from a derangement of the kidneys and better health in that organ is obtained quickest by a proper treatment of the kid neys. Swamp-Root corrects inability to hold urine and scalding pain in passing it, and overcomes that unpleasant necessity ;of being compelled togo often through | the day, and to get up many times during j the night. The mild and immediate effect of Swamp-Root, the great kidney remedy is soon realized. It stands the highest be cause of its remarkable health restoring properties. A trial will convince anyone. I Swamp-Root is pleasant to take and is j sold by all druggists in fifty-cent and one-dollar size bottles. You may have a sample bottle and a book that tells all about it, both sent free by mail. Address, I)r. Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y. When writing mention reading this gen | erous offer in this paper. Don't make any mistake, but remember the name, | Swamp-Root, atnl don't let a dealer sell you something in place of Swamp-Root— tf you do you will be disappointed. eWMfc-MfrMVeoGNMiKiIMK-*'.' '■>«. i LUCKY IMITATION. Ari Experience With the Russian Au tocrat Marshal Gourko. Marshal Gourko, the famous Russian j general, was a terrible autocrat. On I one occasion au impersonator of cele j bra ted men was performing at a thea j ter in Odessa. One evening he recelv i ed a mysterious message, which read, | "Study General Gourko." Iu Russia i It is better not to inquire into matters that one does not understand, and so | the artist spent an hour in privately impersonating the autocratic Russian. Just as the evening performance was j about to commence an order of arrest signed by Gourko was presented to the i impersonator, and without explanation j ho was led through the streets to the | marshal's palace and into an apart ment where the terrible man was seat | ed. "They tell me that you Imper sonate celebrated men," he roared. "Impersonate me!" Giving a hasty look at Gourko, the performer turned to the mirror to | "make up." It was an anxious time, for if the marshal should take excep ! tlon to the representation he had un limited power to inflict punishment The impersonator dragged himself to gether and turned to the marshal a j copy of his own face and overbearing manner. Gourko burst luto a roar of laughter, and the dangerous moment was over. AN INSPIRING TRIBUTE. Touching Bcene That Occurred In the House of Representatives. From a volume by lion. A. E. Ste venson, "Something of Men I nave Known," Is taken this nccount of an incident which deserves a place in memory: A touching scene occurred In the house of representatives a number of years ago when an aged member from New Jersey arose and for the first time addressed the speaker. All eyes were turned in his direction as he stood calmly awaiting recognition. He was tall, spare and erect. Ills ven erable nppearance and kindly expres sion, coupled with most courteous manners, at once commanded atten tion. As in husky tones he again said "Mr. Speaker:" there came from the farthest end of the great hall in a whisper, but distinctly heard by nil, the words, "Sweet Alice, Ben Bolt." A moment later and from the floor and gallery many voices blended In the familiar refrain. "Don't you remem ber sweet Alice, Ben Bolt?" The ovation which immediately fol lowed was such as is rarely witnessed in the great hall. Business was sus pended for the moment and the hand of the new member warmly grasped by the chosen representatives of nil parties and sections. It was an in spiring tribute, one worthily bestowed. The member was Thomas Dunn Eug lish. author of the little poem, sung in palace and cottage, which has found Its way into all languages and touched all hearts. The Man Behind the Gun. The late Admiral Erben had the good fortune or the merit to originate a world circling phrase, "the man be hind the gun." lie used it in a speech on the factors of success in naval war fare to emphasize the necessity of 1 having efficiency, preparedness, run through the entire personnel. It was also a reminder that the enlisted men have a good deal more to do with bringing about victory than always appears in history or official reports. The expression was employed in sup plementing the views of Gaptalu Ma ban and attained circulation at once as epitomizing a whole library of in struct lon.-Boston Transcript. Of Vital Importance. Mrs. Benham—The doctor says that mother won't live until morning. Beu bam— Does he promise that or merely predict it?— New York Press. He Knew. Young Woman (adoringly)—lt must be awfully nice to be wise and know, oh, everything! Vale Seulor— It is.— [ Yale Courant.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers