Answering
The Call, j
By Dorothy Glenn.
11l Copyrighted, 1907, by M. M. Cunningham. ||
Forej the scowled out Into the black
night. The southbound express was
already overdue. As soon as the long
train of coaches had thundered past
he could close up and go home.
"Going home" meant a dash across
the sodden field to where he had pitch
ed bis tent for the summer. Jack Bai
ley, ti.e regular operator at Haddon
Junction, owned a tiny house, one of
the four that constituted the settle
ment about the place, but Howard
Forsythe preferred the tent for the
summer, a»d so the house was shut up.
Hard work had kept Howard For
sythe in bad health all winter, and tho
physician had advised camping. He
had pleaded the necessity for earning
sufficient money to enable him to com
plete his senior year at college, and so
the doctor had suggested Haddon
Junction. Bailey was to lie married
and was going out west on his honey
moon. lie expected to l>e gone all
summer and was glad to have a man
to take his place who would be willing
to give It up in the fall.
Matters were arranged between Bai
ley and the train dispatcher, and ever
since the college year hfid closed How
ard Forsythe had reported the trains
on the main line and the little twenty
five mile spur that gave the Junction
Its name.
There were dreary times between,
and Howard spent a part of his leisure
in talking to Lottie Bayliss, the agent
up in Green Hlver, tho first stop on
the branch line. Lottie was a cousin
of Mrs. Fyce, who lived at the Junc
tion, and it was her custom to run
down on her bicycle after her office
was closed as soon as Jhe G:"7 -had
gone up.
She found the station more interest
ing than her cousin, and before the
middle of August she was wearing the
ring that Howard had ordered from
town. They were not to be married
"1 DID NOT TKMECBAI'H Kolt Mil. I'OH
-BYTHK."
nntii Howard had graduated, but the
thought was an incentive to the man,
and the days sped all too rapidly un
til the inevitable lovers' quarrel.
That had occurred three days before
and Lottie had not been down.to the
junction since. It was for that reason
rather than because of the belated
train that Howard' scowled into the
darkness as lie looked down the track.
At last the headlight gleamed faint
ly through the deluge, growing bright
er, until with a roar the train swept
past. Howard reported the train to
the dispatcher's office and prepared to
close the station. He was Just slip
ping into his raincoat when the Instru
ment, on the Hampton Hue began to
click out his call, and without waiting
lor a reply went on.
"I am alone in the station and rob
bers are trying to blow open the safe.
I am tied to a chair and cannot es
cape. Come to my assistance."
Howard groaned. It was eight miles
to Green River, and through the pelting
■torin lie could not make it In less than
twenty minutes. Perhaps he would
be too late.
ne ran to the shed where the track
bicycle was stored and ran It out upon
the rails. There was no use to carry |
the raincoat. He threw It in the shed. J
together with his coat and vest, and, ,
making sure that his revolver was In j
bis pocket, he stepped Into the seat.
It whs iin trrsrta nil the wnv to Green
Hlver. but the tracks were wet
enough to hold the wheels, and How
ard bent to his work. He had gained
In health since he had come to the
Junction, and no freshman working
to make the eight had ever bent his
back to his work as did Howard For
sythe speeding to the rescue of the
girl he loved.
llu was drenched to tl- • Kkln, aud
the driving rain nearly i Vnded him,
but he flight his way between the
teeth of the half gale that wns blow
ing, and at last the lights of Green
Hlver came Into sight and encouraged
Mm to make a final spurt With a
wsh he drew into the station and
sprang from the bicycle. The station
■was dark and apparently deserted.
As quietly as he could Howard crept
about the platform, peering Into the
windows. He could see qo sign of life,
and at last he nought force the
doors In the belief that the robbery
must have been accomplished. He was
utill working upon the lock when a
heavy hand fell upon his shoulder.
"Got ye!" was the triumphant excla
mation. "Stole a track velocipede, did
yer? Goln' to rob all the stations In
the rain? Well, there's one constable
. . kl« 4.*. »•
"Are you tho constable?" demanded
Howard. The other flashed his star
with a gesture of pride, and Howard
went on:
•'I am the operator from the Junc
tion. I had a message from Miss Bay-
Uss. She telegraphed that she was In
trouble, and 1 came to her assistance."
•'I guess Ixjttle Bayliss don't have to
call on the Junction for no help wiille
I'm here," was the rejoinder. "Lottie
never sent no message like that. That's
too thin a story, young fellow."
"But it is trre," Forsyte persisted.
"Force the door, and you will find her
tied to a chair. There have been rob
bers hero already."
The constable grinned.
"You want to tell me that she's tied
to a chair? I was over to Clem Bay
llss' tonight. Jest came away from
there. Lottie said good night to me.
Come along now."
"Are you going to take me to the
Jail?" Forsythe demanded.
"That's what I be," was the answer
In uncompromising tones.
"Will you stop at the Baylisses on the
way there?" he bogged. "It will only
take a moment, and Miss Bayliss will
Identify me."
The constable paused uncertainly,
but at last he decided to grant the re
quest and he led Howard up the trim
walk through the Bayliss garden.
"1 caught this young fellow trying to
break Into the station, lie declared
that Lottie telegraphed him to come
up." he explained to his recent host.
Lottie came Into the hall at that mo
ment.
"I did not telegraph for Mr. For
sythe," she said coldly. "I have not
been In the station all evening."
"lint you did," persisted Howard.
"You telegraphed me that you were
bound to a chair In the station and
that robbers were preparing to blow
open the safe. I would know your
Morse anywhere any time."
To the surprise of all I.ottie began
to laugh s<> that she sank down upon
a chair. It was some minutes before
she could explain. At last her mirth
abated.
"I am teaching my nephew, Ted,-
telegraphy," she explained. "I bor
rowed some wire from the construc
tion department, and most of it Is
strung on the railroad polos. I was
practicing with him tonight, and I sent
that absurd message for fun. The
wire must have broken in the storm
and crossed your wire, and that Is
how yon happened to get It."
"And it's a sell?" ho asked ruefully
as he thought of the hard trip.
"How did you come up?" she asked.
"On the track bicycle," he explained.
"Through all this storm?" 112
Howard nodded.
"You poor boy," she said. "You must
1 have nearly killed yourself, rather
will take you upstairs and give you
! some dry clothes.
"It would be no use," lie reminded,
j "I've got to get back again. The limit-
I ed goes through at fl and must be re
| ported."
| "But you will take good care of your
, self when you get back, won't you?"
! she pleaded.
Howard noildod. She followed him
i to the il^>r.
"Howard," she called, as he was
turning away. lie came back up the
steps.
"I'm going down to see Cousin Jane
tomorrow afternoon," she said softly.
"I'll tell you then how sorry I am th;kt
I was cross and hateful tho other
nlglit."
There was a soft sound of meeting
lips, and then Howard went down the
walk. The rain still poured in sheets,
but he did not notice it In answering
the call he had found not danger, but
happiness, at the other end of the wire.
TOLD HIS WIFE ABOUT IT.
And Then Accused Her of Having No
Sense of Humor.
Englishmen are often accused of be
ing unable to grasp the point of the
American pun, and sometimes they
may think they see the point of a joke
when perhaps they do not. An Eng
lishman named Morley was walking
along the sidewalk one day with an
American friend when the latter inad
vertently slipped and fell down.
"Ah, my deah boy, I hope you are
not hurt! How did it happen?"
To which the friend replied:
"It happened notwithstanding."
They both lung ted over the pun, and
Morley said it -vas so good he was
going to telf his wife about it At
dinner that evening he remarked that
he had such a good joke on his friend
Brown, and by way of preliminary,
leading up to the point of his story,
he proceeded to tell all about who
Brown was, his associations and busi
ness connections, how he came to get
acquainted with him, commercial re
lations he had had with him, etc., until
he forgot about the story, but was re
minded of it by the wife, who said im
patiently :
"But what about the story?"
"Oh, yes!" laughing Immoderately as
the recollection of it struck him.
"Why, you see. Brown and I were
walking down the street together, and
he slipped on a banana peeling and
fell down, and when I asked him how
it happened he said, 'Nevertheless.' "
And he was sore at her all evening
and declared she had no sense of hu
mor because she said she didn't see
anything funny to that—Judge's Li
brary. V
The Black Cap Judge.
Judge Hawkins, an English judge of
the last century, who was a horsy
man, was reminded even on the race
course of his reputation as a hanging
judge. His friend, Lord Falmouth,
was running two horses in the same
race under magpie colors, and to dis
tinguish the second he ordered Archer,
the Jockey, to wear a black cap. But
a black cap was nowhere to be found
at the moment when the race was due.
At this moment Judge Hawkins emerg
ed from the "bird cage" and was rec
ognized by Archer, who shouted out to
Fordham: "We are all right now
Here comes narry Hawkins, and he
Is sure to have a black cap in hia
pocket!"
Reversed the Process.
"Yes, sir, the major went in swim- j
mln", an' I'm blest ef a feller didn't
come along an' steal all his clothes!" I
"An" what did he do then?"
"Broke the record by goln' home in a
barrel. Instead o' the barrel goln' home ;
in him."—Atlanta Constitution.
* Jim's *
Honeumoon.
By CARTER HAVEN.
Copyrighted, lflOT, by Homer Spraguo.
13 O
"I never saw a circus," pouted Pit
cilia.
"It ain't done ye no harm so fur as I
c'n see," commented her father criti
cally. 'T guess you're likely to get
your full growth without seein' one."
"I've got the egg money," putin
Mrs. Chesney. "I can let her have
some of that, SI."
"I'm goln' t' need that for the mort
gage," he explained.
Mrs. Chesney sighed. Some of tb»
women she knew really kept the egg
money. There was a fiction to the
effect that she did also, but Silas
usually found somu excuse for I<>r
rowlng the mnnc^yfbefore the sum
grew large, and Martha Chesney meek
ly submitted to Ills demands. She did
want Drucie to see a circus, though.
Half a dollar would not be much.
"I'll take her."
Silas wheeled angrily to confront the
last speaker. It was all very well that
Jim Peters, his hired man, should
worship Drucilla. Silas paid Jim $4 a
montli less than the prevailing wage
on that very account. To pay her
open court was another and very dif
ferent matter. Silas had decided that
Drucie was to marry Hank Testis.
Hank was a little old (about sixty),
but he had a tine farm adjoining the
Chesney place, and the match was an
ideal one from the father's point of
vie\j.
"You won't take her nor yourself,"
he snarled. "I told you I had a job
for you. You get every Sunday, don't
you? And I give you the Fourth o'
July without dockin' ye!"
"I'm goiug to the circus," said Jim
coldly. "If Drucie wants to come she
can come with me. I'll be glad to
have her."
"You ain't neither of ye goin'," said
Silas as he stumped out of the kitch
en. That settled it so far as he was
concerned, lie did not even trouble to
stay home on circus day to see that
his commands were carried out. lie
was accustomed to being obeyed. That
there could be defiance of his wishes
was a thing not to be dreamed of. He
had business at Center Mills, and ho
drove off early In the morning with a
final negative to the tearful Drucilla's
appeals.
Jim watched him drive off, and
when at last the gray team disap
peared over the hill he came toward
the house. Martha Chesney was bus
"OFT OtJTKIi HKBE," HE CBIEU. "I DON'T
WANT NONE u' VJi ABOUT ME."
tliug about the kitchen while Drucilla
sat on the back porch paring the pota
toes.
"Going to tho circus':" Jim asked
cheerfully. "It's about time we got
ready."
"1 can't." Drucilla's face turned
grave at the suggestion of disobedience
to the paternal command.
"Look here," said Jim, calmly drop
ping down upon the lowest step, "li s
about time that something was done
to show your pa that you've got some
rights. 1 bet old man Festis won't
lake you to the circus when you marry
him." t
"Who said she was goiu' to marry i
llatrk Festis?" demanded Mrs. Ches
ney, coming to the door.
"Everybody—and Mr. Chesney." was
the scornful answer.
"She's not going to marry a man old
enough to be her grandfather even if j
he's got a farm as big as this whole
county," declared Martha.
"Just what I say," declared Jiui
amiably. "We could goto the circus
as a sort of honeymoon."
Drucie clasped her hands. Long ago
she had confessed her love for Jim
even while she told him that tier fa
ther would never give hi•• jSent.
This suggestion of elop ~-nt fairly
took her breath away. A circus her
first circus and a marriage on the
same day! It seemed too wonderful to
be true, yet Jim was talking about it
as calmly as though l>eing married
were an everyday affair.
"Why not?" he demanded. "It'll take
an hour to drive to town. We can see
the street parade, go get married aud
see the afternoon show. Old Martha
will come over from the poor fu-m to
look after the house."
In the eud it was even as he had
planned. Silas Chesney came home to =
And the house deserted save for old
Martha sitting on the porch. She was
very deaf, and only by dint of much j
shouting did lie learn that his folks
had gone off with Peters to the circus. ;
He made a solitary meal and then i
went out on the front stoop to await
the return of the runaways. Jim had
insisted upon a supper at a restaurant
After the show as a windup to the |
celebration, and It was late when they !
drove into the yard. For several hours
Silas had been letting his wrath gather
strength, and he came storming across
the grass as they drove down the side
path.
"Get outer hew." he cried "I Am'i
WUIK none o : ye aoouc me, ye aecetrfm
critters. I told ye not togo to the
circus. Get outer here."
Jim obediently turned the team and
headed for the gate-. Silas came run
ning after them.
"What be ye doin'?" he demanded.
"You're runnln' away with my team."
"We'll get out and walk then," said
Jim promptly, jumping to the ground.
"Come, Oracle."
The girl sprang down aud he caught
her in his arms, implanting a sounding
kiss upon her lips before he released
her. Then he helped Mrs. Chesney out
and the trio started for the gate.
"What are you doin* now?" howleaC
Silas. Jim turned with well affected
surprise.
"You turned us out and cast us off."
he said. "We're going. Tim Newbury
offered me his north farm on half
shares. I'm going to take his offer.
My wife and her mother are going
with me."
"Your what?" Silas could scarcely
believe his ears.
"My wife." explained Jim politely.
"You'll have to hire a man at full
price and hire a girl too. Mrs. Ches
ncy wants to come with me. I'll give
her the egg money for kc^'s."
Silas' jaw dropped. Jim had picked
out the most potent argument and
with It he had won. Silas moved to
ward the house.
"You folks will catch your death of
colds If you don't come iuside." he
growled. "Come along, Marthy."
Drucie followed Jim out to the
stable to hold the lantern while he un
harnessed the horses.
"When did Mr. Newbury make you
that offer?" she demanded curiously.
"Last year," explained Jim. "I guess
your pa ain't the only one that can
bluff around here—not when I've got
you to bluff for."
THE AEROPLANE.
Keeping It Properly Balanced Is a Dif
ficult Art.
An aeroplane may be defined as a
surface propelled horizontally In such
a manner that the resulting pressure
of air from beneath prevents its fall
ing. A balloon can remain stationary
over a given spot iu a calm, but an
aeroplane must be kept in motion if
It Is to remain gi the air. Such a plane
literally runs ou the air like a skater
gliding over thin ice. The most fa
miliar example of an aeroplane Is the
kite of our boyhood days. We all re
member how we kept it aloft even in
a light breeze by running with it
against the wind. Substitute the pull
of a propeller for the .ord and the
aeropla'.e flying machine Is created.
If this were all, the problem of arti
ficial flight would have been solved long
ngo. There remains the supremely
difficult art of balancing the plane so
that It vViil skate ou an even keel.
Even birds find It hard to maintain
this stability. In the constant effort
to steady himself a hawk sways from
side to side as be soars. Hko an acro
bat ou a tight rope. Occasionally a
I*-,1 will catch the wind on the top
of his wing, with (he result that he
will capsize and fall some distance be
fore he can recover himself. If the
living aeroplanes of nature find the
feat of balancing so difficult. Is it auy
wonder that men have been killed in
endeavoring to discover their secret?
If you have ever#sailed a canoe you
will readily understand what tills task
of balancing an aeroplane really means.
As the pressure of the wind on your
sail heels your canoe over you must
climb out on the outrigger far enough
for your weight to counterbalance the
wind pressure, so that you will not be
upset. The physicist sclent ilk-ally ex
plains your achievement by staling
that you have succeeded in keeping the
center of air pressure and the center
of gravity on the same straight line.
In a canoe the feat is comparatively
easy; in an aeroplane it demands con
stant and linshlike shifting of the
body, because the sudden slight varia
tions of the wind must be Immediately
opposed. V aldemar Kaempffest in
Cosmopolitan.
MAGIC OF THE BASS.
Memories of the Battle That Linger
With the Angler.
"The Indians call It "Me-da Mon-nuh
she-can.' which translated means mag
ic bass. He is said to be much like
other black bass in appearance. Rut
his peculiar attributes are these:
"lie must be caught by casting, with
a surface halt, so that you can see him
rise to It. He may be taken In running
water where the clear current foams
over mossy bowlders and through gur
gling, sunlit shallow? or In the silent
pools where the forest hangs darkly
over the stream. He may be taken at
some still lake' 4 grassy marge, where
the water lilies build him a green and
white and golden canopy, or In the
open places when the west wind's
magic turns the glassy surface Into
silver.
"But wherever you find him you will
see that nature rules supreme. And
whether in brawling stream or quiet
pool. In some peaceful lilied bay or just |
beneath the rippled broad expanse, ;
where the wild beauty of the spot i
makes your heart beat faster, here i
may you find the magic bass.
"And this is his magic: That when !
you have fought him inch by inch and
have looked upon him as he lay ex
hausted in your landing net you are
his forever. For wherever you go and
whatever you do there will come to
you ever and often a dream of his first
leap into the air, of the tugging line
and of his body at your feet, and indis
tinct behind It nil lie the sparkling wa
ter and the forest and the blue sky.
"In the dead of winter you will of a
sudden hear the soft splash of the bass
rising to your fly, you will fee! the sud
den tautness of the line, and the snow
outside your window will melt Into a
summer landscape. When you are
busiest there will come to you the song
of the reel and the smell of pine and
flr and balsam. That Is the magic
of the Me-da Mon-nub-she-gan."—Out?
Jng Magazine.
Continuous Cooking.
"New York Is a place of continuous
cooking," said the woman from the
west. "Walk along any street at any
time and you will get a whiff of coffee
and broiling meat There doesn't
seem to be any set time for meals.
Judging by the sm«ll, breakfast Is a
movable feast that takes place any
time between 0 o'clock and noon."—
New York Post.
Trescott's
Graduation.
By JAMES CHAMBERS.
Copyrighted, ISKJ7. t»y C. H. SutnlJTe.
0 ' in
Trescott clipped the advertisement
from the paper uiul tucked It tnto his
pocketbook. He had about made up
his mind togo to one of the fashion
able resorts for his month's vacation,
but this appealing advertisement de
cided hiin.
It was Just a few lines of small type,
but every sentence painted alluringly
the delights of a summer on a farm
and announced that Elm farm was to
be rented for the mouth of August at
an extremely reasonable rate,
j Trescott wrote to "E. Marsden,
' agent," and the answer decided him.
j lie could have a far better time than
; would be his If cooped up in some
j stuffy room at an expensive hotel, and
I the thought of a whole house to him
self for an entire month was attrac
; tlve after having occupied the tiny
bedroom and parlor of a bachelor
apartment for eleven months. So
Marsden engaged to have the farm
house put ill proper order by the first
Saturday In August.
It was with pleasurable anticipation
thatTrescottclimbcHl Into the buekboard
| that met him ut the station. The farm
was a comfortable looking place, some
fifteen acres in extent, and bordering a
small lake. The house, a two story
frame, was painted, and beds of flow
ers made the front yard gorgeous.
Inside it was the pink of cleanliness,
but the place struck a chill to his xouJL
The arrangement of tlie furniture re
minded him of the cheap boarding
house iu which ho bad si>ent his first
: years 1 a the city, and try as he would
he could not alter the gaunt arrange
ment of the place. He had sent some
money to the agent with the request
that some simple groceries be put In,
and he had no trouble In getting his
supper, but the moment the meal was
"YOt* CAN HKLp!" SHI'. CONCEDED, WITH
A SMILE.
over and the dishes washed he went
! out of doors to smoke his pipe. He
did not enter the place again until
It was time to seek the chill bedroom.
It was raining the next morning,
and he spent a most miserable day
roaming about the dreary rooms and
wishing for the Sunday papers. He
had a couple of books in his satchel,
but be could not make himself com
fortable enough to read, and.after
vainly seeking to change the furniture
about into some semblance of com
fort, he gave it up aud dragged an
old rocker out to the barn Here, ut
least, he felt less oppressed by the
dreariness of it all.
He spent a fairly comfortable after
noon and was just about to rouse him
self togo in and prepare supper when
the sound of wheels caught his ear.
followed in .t moment by the jaugle
of the doorbell.
He raced across the yard and
through the house to present himself
at the door. A young girl stood ~
the porch, while an elderly woman sat
In the covered buggy.
"Good afternoon," was her brisk
greeting. "Is Mrs. Trescott at home?"
There isn't any Mrs. Trescott," be
said, with a laugh, "unless you mean
my mother She Is In England Just
now."
"I am Miss Marsden," she explained.
"I drove out to get acquainted and
see bow you liked the place. 1 tup
posed. of course, that there was a fam
ily." ,
"There Isn't anv famJlv." he said
"and l don't like the place. Of all
the dismal places 1 was ever In this is
the worst. I was going ir to tell your
brother so in the morning. 'Comfort
able aud homelike.' " he quoted from
the advertisement. "And he promised
to liave it all fixed up."
"There wis a woman here all day
Friday," the girl said. "Didn't she
clean up properly?"
"She cleaned up," he conceded, "but
I can't make the place look homelike.
I shiver every time I look at it. I'm
going to change the name and call
it Lemon farm Instead."
"I guess It's not as bad as that," she
said, with a rippling laugh. "I thought
there would be a woman In the family
to make things look 'homey.' so I did
aot come myself. May we come in?"
He stood aside in silent Invitation.
He followed them into the bouse, and
bis admiration for the personality of
the brisk young woman increased as
she rapidly moved from room to room,
Jiving the touch here and there that
was needed to transform the apart
ments.
"You're a magician," he declared as,
with a final pat to the sofa pillows,
•he transformed the parlor and moved
Into the dining room. "Now it looks
like a place to be lived In."
"It's the purely feminine touch that
with a little laugh 'lf I hart' Known
that you were alone, I should have
been out yesterday morning before you
arrived."
"I'm glad you waited," he »aid sim
ply. "Won't you and your mother stay
to supperV I can cook if I <m;i't keep
house. I will put the horse up and
you can telephone your brother."
"I am 'E. Marsdfto,' " she explained.
"I have no brother. When father died
I decided to keep up the busi aess. Eva
Marsden did not look very well, and,
besides, people do not like to do busi
! uess witli a woman. So, between the
simple initial and a typewriter, I man
age to get along."
i "You should come to tmvn," he ad
vised, "and call yourself a 'home
maker.' It ought to be worth a lot of
! money."
"That might be profitable In winter,"
1 she agreed. "Perhaps I will try it."
I "But In the meantime, supper," he
insisted. "I'll look after the horse.
There are a couple of magazines you
might cure to look at while I am gone.
I shall no.: be long."
i He dashed out to get the horse nnder
cover. He returned the back way and
surprised the girl bustling about the
kitchen.
"You can help," she conceded, with a
smile, "but I just know that you can't
make biscuit."
"But I can," he insisted. "I'll show
you some-day. Meantime I'll make the
' coffee and put the things oa the table."
"Tile table is all set," she cried.
"You must think mo a very slow house
keeper."
"It takes me longer than that," he
admitted, "though I suppose that prac
tice makes perfect, and before long I
shall be aHe to do as well as you."
"I'll con to tea on your last night
here and let you give a graduation ex
hibition," she promised, with a laugh,
j "Meantime you might get some fresh
water."
Trescott was sorry to see them drive
off, but the girl left behind the fra
grant memory of her presence, and the
place seemed homelike at last
Trescott saw much of the Marsflens
in t'"> days that followed, and long
before the end of his month he had
come to love the light hearted girl
who. had faced the world so bravely
when necessity demanded.
The vacation drew to a close all too
soon, and Trescott insisted upon hold
ing Eva to her promise to attend his
graduation exhibition. Afterward they
sat out under tlie trees while Mrs.
Marsden drowsed contentedly upon
the porch.
"llave you been thinking over that
honiemaking proposition?" he asked.
Eva looked up, with a smile. 1
"I think 1 lack the courage to make
a try," she confessed. "It has been
very easy here. It is best to leave
well enough alone."
"Do you think you would care to
take on a single contract?" he suggest
ed. "You have spoiled me for a bach
elor ap»rtment."
"I might help you get started in a
flat," she agreed. "I usually tako a
i vacation after the summer season is
over. I could help you buy your
things and settle thein."
"But I should want you to stay and
help use them," be explained—"to be
a perpetual homemaker to one lone
bachelor. What do you say, dear?"
"1' think." she whispered, "that I
should like that plan better than the
first."
"Then seal the contract with a kiss,"
pleaded Trescott
RAISED HIS WAGES.
The Way an Employer Got Square
With a Faithless Assistant.
A story is told in Milwaukee cou
eerniug an elderly German who con
ducted a good sized manufacturing
plant on the south side. He bad an
engineer at his factory who had been
with him for fifteen years and the old
gentleman had implicit confidence in
lilm. It was with a profound shock
that he discovered finally that the
trusted engiueeit was "grafting" most
shamefully.
The proprietor thought it all over
a long while and then sent for the en
gineer. When that functionary arriv
ed the following dialogue took place:
"Ah, John! Good morning. John. How
long haf you been vorking by this
place?" 9
"Fifteen years."
"Aeh, so. And vot are your wages?"
"Twenty-live - dollars a week." '
"M-m-m. Veil, after today It viil be
$5 a veek more."
The engineer thanked his employer
profusely and withdrew. A week later
'.he old gentleman sent for him again,
and the same conversation ensued,
ending with another $5 a week raise. 1
The third Saturday he sent for the
engineer again, and after the same
questions and answers he raised his
salary another $5 a week.
On the fourth Saturday the engineer
was again summoned before the boss.
"How long have you been vorking
here, John?" asked the proprietor.
"Fifteen years," replied the engineer,
who by this time had grown to expect
the weekly question and salary raise
as a regular thing.
"And how much vages are you get
ting?"
"Forty dollars a week."
" Veh, so? Yell, you are fired."
' Fired!" exclaimed the engineer, al
most fainting. "Why, you have been
raising my salary ?."> at a clip for the
last three weeks."
"Sure I have," roared the Teutonic
boss, all his indignation flaring out at
once. "Ami, the reason that 1 did it
vas that it shall make it harder for
you for vhen I tire you, you loafer!"—
Milwaukee Wisconsin.
The Savage and the Bird Cage.
A gentleman who went out with
Stanley to Africa took with him a
numlier of bird ca:;es iu which he hop
ed to bring back some specimens of
the rarer birds of the interior. Owing
to the death of his carriers he was
obliged to throw away the bird cages,
with a numlier of other articles These
were seized by the natives In great
glee, though they did not know what
to do with them, but they eventually
decided that the small circular cages
were a kind of headgear, and, knock- [
Ing off the bottom, the chiefs strutted !
about in them with evident pride. One
chief, thinking himself more wise than
the other?; and having seen the white
men eat at table out of dishes, thought
they were receptacles for food and
took his meals from one, ceremoniooa
ly opening and shutting the door be
tween each mouthful.
BUYIIBG A SAW.
Find Out the Kind You Want Before
You Goto Purchase.
When fie man in the golf cap start
ed downstairs his wife Ban lo the door
and called lilm back.
"Ilarry," she-said, "1 want you to go
into a hardware store today and get a
saw. Don't forget it. please. We need
one badly."
Being an accommodating person, the
inan in the cap said he would not
forget It. He chose the luncheon hour
as the most opportune time for making
his simple purchase-. He was in a good
humor, and he smiled blandly when he
went bustling into the store and said:
"I want a s«w, please."
"What kind ot a saw?" asked the
clerk.
"Why," said the prospective pur
chaser, "1 don't know; just a saw.
Any kind will Jo. I presume."
The clerk sighed. "If you only knew
what you want to use it for,
I could advise- you," he suggested.
"What I want to use it for?" echoed
the mpj in the golf cap. "Why, I
want to saw, of course—that Is, my _
folks do."
"Saw what?" asked the clerk.
"I don't know." attained the non
plused shopper.
The clerk led the way to the rear of
the store. "I w'll show you a few of
the different varieties of saws we have
on hand." he snid. "Observation and
explanation of their uses and priefs,,'
may assist you In making a decision.
Here Is a metal saw. It is made of
highly tempered steel and will saw
Iron, copper, lead and all manner of
metals. Is that the kind you want?"
The man in the golf cap was sorely
perplexed. "Xo," he said. "I don't
think so. We have no metals at our
house to work on that I know of."
"Perhaps you would like a meat
saw?" suggested the clerk. "But you
are not a butcher."
"Heaven be praised, no!" said the
man who wanted a saw.
"Here is a regular kitchen saw for
general utility purposes. It will cost
you only 50 cents. How does that
strike you? Xo? Then here Is thq
cabinetmaker's saw. Then I have
here the plumbers' saws, the fine deli
cate saws used by all manner of artifi
cers and the ordinary wood saws,
which will cost you anywhere from 50
cents to $4. In that back room we
have still other varieties of saws—the
two man ten foot saws, bun/ saws and
circular saws. If you want to pay a
big price you had better take one <>.'
the circular saws. I'll give you a good
one for SSOO. Would you like to see
them?"
The man in the golf cap looked about
him wouderingly.
"Xo, thank you," he said. "1 guess
I won't take any till I find out just
what kind I want."
"I regret: being unable to make a
sale," said the clerk affably, "but I
really think that the best plan."—Cin
cinnati Enquirer.
Richter's Conducting.
Countless are the stories told of the
genially of l>r. Ilaus Hichter. Once
while rehearsing a Mozart symphony
in which the first violins had a nunlher
of delicate trills and turns to perform
these were played too heavily for Itieh
ter, who said: "Please, gentlemen,
pianissimo! Queeti Mab. not suffra
gettes." Again when on one occasion
Hichter was not thoroughly satisfied
with the orchestral rendering of a
scene from "Tristan und Isolde" he
stopped lie rehearsal and asked for
more diguity in the playing, adding
that Isolde was the daughter of a king,
not of a cook. On another occasion
while rehearsing Tschaikowsky's "Ro
meo and Juliet" music the violoncellos
have a very passionate melody to play.
Hichter was by no means satisfied
that then« .'dful warmth of expression
had been obtained. "Gentlemen. gen
tlcmen." said lie. "y u all play like
married men. not like lovers "—London
Tit-Bits.
I
Girjs' Names.
In the eighteenth century ;K s were
christened Sophia and < a .iirtv a the
early nineteenth Emma and .lane, a
little Hater Laura and Clara. Then
came n crop of Dorothys and Marjo-.
ries, who are now all calling their own
babies tin a reaction against the
"quaint") Elizabeth. The names of
men suffer no such tmphatie fashions,
and yet it is a flleasure to note that"
there arc certainly no more young
men called Alf and Gns. as were the
young men who walked with the crin
oline In the days of l,eeeh. Good is thev
sound of John through all changes.—
London Chronicle.
First Public Street Cleaner.
The Dutch housewives of old Xew
York, ever noted for their housekeep
ing qualities, created the agitation
which resulted In the appointment of
the first public street cleaner in Xew
York in 1602. He was Laurens Van
der Speigle. a baker. His daughter
married Rip Van Dam. who afterward
became governor of Xew York, an il
lustration of the democracy of that
day.
UETJI IV!
A Reliable
TIN SHOP
Tor all kind of Tin Roofing,
Spoutlne and General
•Job Work.
Stoyea, Heaters. Ran«es,
Furnaces. »to.
PRICES THE LOWEST!
QUALITY TUB BEST!
JOHN HIXSOJV
NO. IU S. FEONT ST.