Answering The Call, j By Dorothy Glenn. 11l Copyrighted, 1907, by M. M. Cunningham. || Forej the scowled out Into the black night. The southbound express was already overdue. As soon as the long train of coaches had thundered past he could close up and go home. "Going home" meant a dash across the sodden field to where he had pitch ed bis tent for the summer. Jack Bai ley, ti.e regular operator at Haddon Junction, owned a tiny house, one of the four that constituted the settle ment about the place, but Howard Forsythe preferred the tent for the summer, a»d so the house was shut up. Hard work had kept Howard For sythe in bad health all winter, and tho physician had advised camping. He had pleaded the necessity for earning sufficient money to enable him to com plete his senior year at college, and so the doctor had suggested Haddon Junction. Bailey was to lie married and was going out west on his honey moon. lie expected to l>e gone all summer and was glad to have a man to take his place who would be willing to give It up in the fall. Matters were arranged between Bai ley and the train dispatcher, and ever since the college year hfid closed How ard Forsythe had reported the trains on the main line and the little twenty five mile spur that gave the Junction Its name. There were dreary times between, and Howard spent a part of his leisure in talking to Lottie Bayliss, the agent up in Green Hlver, tho first stop on the branch line. Lottie was a cousin of Mrs. Fyce, who lived at the Junc tion, and it was her custom to run down on her bicycle after her office was closed as soon as Jhe G:"7 -had gone up. She found the station more interest ing than her cousin, and before the middle of August she was wearing the ring that Howard had ordered from town. They were not to be married "1 DID NOT TKMECBAI'H Kolt Mil. I'OH -BYTHK." nntii Howard had graduated, but the thought was an incentive to the man, and the days sped all too rapidly un til the inevitable lovers' quarrel. That had occurred three days before and Lottie had not been down.to the junction since. It was for that reason rather than because of the belated train that Howard' scowled into the darkness as lie looked down the track. At last the headlight gleamed faint ly through the deluge, growing bright er, until with a roar the train swept past. Howard reported the train to the dispatcher's office and prepared to close the station. He was Just slip ping into his raincoat when the Instru ment, on the Hampton Hue began to click out his call, and without waiting lor a reply went on. "I am alone in the station and rob bers are trying to blow open the safe. I am tied to a chair and cannot es cape. Come to my assistance." Howard groaned. It was eight miles to Green River, and through the pelting ■torin lie could not make it In less than twenty minutes. Perhaps he would be too late. ne ran to the shed where the track bicycle was stored and ran It out upon the rails. There was no use to carry | the raincoat. He threw It in the shed. J together with his coat and vest, and, , making sure that his revolver was In j bis pocket, he stepped Into the seat. It whs iin trrsrta nil the wnv to Green Hlver. but the tracks were wet enough to hold the wheels, and How ard bent to his work. He had gained In health since he had come to the Junction, and no freshman working to make the eight had ever bent his back to his work as did Howard For sythe speeding to the rescue of the girl he loved. llu was drenched to tl- • Kkln, aud the driving rain nearly i Vnded him, but he flight his way between the teeth of the half gale that wns blow ing, and at last the lights of Green Hlver came Into sight and encouraged Mm to make a final spurt With a wsh he drew into the station and sprang from the bicycle. The station ■was dark and apparently deserted. As quietly as he could Howard crept about the platform, peering Into the windows. He could see qo sign of life, and at last he nought force the doors In the belief that the robbery must have been accomplished. He was utill working upon the lock when a heavy hand fell upon his shoulder. "Got ye!" was the triumphant excla mation. "Stole a track velocipede, did yer? Goln' to rob all the stations In the rain? Well, there's one constable . . kl« 4.*. »• "Are you tho constable?" demanded Howard. The other flashed his star with a gesture of pride, and Howard went on: •'I am the operator from the Junc tion. I had a message from Miss Bay- Uss. She telegraphed that she was In trouble, and 1 came to her assistance." •'I guess Ixjttle Bayliss don't have to call on the Junction for no help wiille I'm here," was the rejoinder. "Lottie never sent no message like that. That's too thin a story, young fellow." "But it is trre," Forsyte persisted. "Force the door, and you will find her tied to a chair. There have been rob bers hero already." The constable grinned. "You want to tell me that she's tied to a chair? I was over to Clem Bay llss' tonight. Jest came away from there. Lottie said good night to me. Come along now." "Are you going to take me to the Jail?" Forsythe demanded. "That's what I be," was the answer In uncompromising tones. "Will you stop at the Baylisses on the way there?" he bogged. "It will only take a moment, and Miss Bayliss will Identify me." The constable paused uncertainly, but at last he decided to grant the re quest and he led Howard up the trim walk through the Bayliss garden. "1 caught this young fellow trying to break Into the station, lie declared that Lottie telegraphed him to come up." he explained to his recent host. Lottie came Into the hall at that mo ment. "I did not telegraph for Mr. For sythe," she said coldly. "I have not been In the station all evening." "lint you did," persisted Howard. "You telegraphed me that you were bound to a chair In the station and that robbers were preparing to blow open the safe. I would know your Morse anywhere any time." To the surprise of all I.ottie began to laugh s<> that she sank down upon a chair. It was some minutes before she could explain. At last her mirth abated. "I am teaching my nephew, Ted,- telegraphy," she explained. "I bor rowed some wire from the construc tion department, and most of it Is strung on the railroad polos. I was practicing with him tonight, and I sent that absurd message for fun. The wire must have broken in the storm and crossed your wire, and that Is how yon happened to get It." "And it's a sell?" ho asked ruefully as he thought of the hard trip. "How did you come up?" she asked. "On the track bicycle," he explained. "Through all this storm?" 112 Howard nodded. "You poor boy," she said. "You must 1 have nearly killed yourself, rather will take you upstairs and give you ! some dry clothes. "It would be no use," lie reminded, j "I've got to get back again. The limit- I ed goes through at fl and must be re | ported." | "But you will take good care of your , self when you get back, won't you?" ! she pleaded. Howard noildod. She followed him i to the il^>r. "Howard," she called, as he was turning away. lie came back up the steps. "I'm going down to see Cousin Jane tomorrow afternoon," she said softly. "I'll tell you then how sorry I am th;kt I was cross and hateful tho other nlglit." There was a soft sound of meeting lips, and then Howard went down the walk. The rain still poured in sheets, but he did not notice it In answering the call he had found not danger, but happiness, at the other end of the wire. TOLD HIS WIFE ABOUT IT. And Then Accused Her of Having No Sense of Humor. Englishmen are often accused of be ing unable to grasp the point of the American pun, and sometimes they may think they see the point of a joke when perhaps they do not. An Eng lishman named Morley was walking along the sidewalk one day with an American friend when the latter inad vertently slipped and fell down. "Ah, my deah boy, I hope you are not hurt! How did it happen?" To which the friend replied: "It happened notwithstanding." They both lung ted over the pun, and Morley said it -vas so good he was going to telf his wife about it At dinner that evening he remarked that he had such a good joke on his friend Brown, and by way of preliminary, leading up to the point of his story, he proceeded to tell all about who Brown was, his associations and busi ness connections, how he came to get acquainted with him, commercial re lations he had had with him, etc., until he forgot about the story, but was re minded of it by the wife, who said im patiently : "But what about the story?" "Oh, yes!" laughing Immoderately as the recollection of it struck him. "Why, you see. Brown and I were walking down the street together, and he slipped on a banana peeling and fell down, and when I asked him how it happened he said, 'Nevertheless.' " And he was sore at her all evening and declared she had no sense of hu mor because she said she didn't see anything funny to that—Judge's Li brary. V The Black Cap Judge. Judge Hawkins, an English judge of the last century, who was a horsy man, was reminded even on the race course of his reputation as a hanging judge. His friend, Lord Falmouth, was running two horses in the same race under magpie colors, and to dis tinguish the second he ordered Archer, the Jockey, to wear a black cap. But a black cap was nowhere to be found at the moment when the race was due. At this moment Judge Hawkins emerg ed from the "bird cage" and was rec ognized by Archer, who shouted out to Fordham: "We are all right now Here comes narry Hawkins, and he Is sure to have a black cap in hia pocket!" Reversed the Process. "Yes, sir, the major went in swim- j mln", an' I'm blest ef a feller didn't come along an' steal all his clothes!" I "An" what did he do then?" "Broke the record by goln' home in a barrel. Instead o' the barrel goln' home ; in him."—Atlanta Constitution. * Jim's * Honeumoon. By CARTER HAVEN. Copyrighted, lflOT, by Homer Spraguo. 13 O "I never saw a circus," pouted Pit cilia. "It ain't done ye no harm so fur as I c'n see," commented her father criti cally. 'T guess you're likely to get your full growth without seein' one." "I've got the egg money," putin Mrs. Chesney. "I can let her have some of that, SI." "I'm goln' t' need that for the mort gage," he explained. Mrs. Chesney sighed. Some of tb» women she knew really kept the egg money. There was a fiction to the effect that she did also, but Silas usually found somu excuse for I<>r rowlng the mnnc^yfbefore the sum grew large, and Martha Chesney meek ly submitted to Ills demands. She did want Drucie to see a circus, though. Half a dollar would not be much. "I'll take her." Silas wheeled angrily to confront the last speaker. It was all very well that Jim Peters, his hired man, should worship Drucilla. Silas paid Jim $4 a montli less than the prevailing wage on that very account. To pay her open court was another and very dif ferent matter. Silas had decided that Drucie was to marry Hank Testis. Hank was a little old (about sixty), but he had a tine farm adjoining the Chesney place, and the match was an ideal one from the father's point of vie\j. "You won't take her nor yourself," he snarled. "I told you I had a job for you. You get every Sunday, don't you? And I give you the Fourth o' July without dockin' ye!" "I'm goiug to the circus," said Jim coldly. "If Drucie wants to come she can come with me. I'll be glad to have her." "You ain't neither of ye goin'," said Silas as he stumped out of the kitch en. That settled it so far as he was concerned, lie did not even trouble to stay home on circus day to see that his commands were carried out. lie was accustomed to being obeyed. That there could be defiance of his wishes was a thing not to be dreamed of. He had business at Center Mills, and ho drove off early In the morning with a final negative to the tearful Drucilla's appeals. Jim watched him drive off, and when at last the gray team disap peared over the hill he came toward the house. Martha Chesney was bus "OFT OtJTKIi HKBE," HE CBIEU. "I DON'T WANT NONE u' VJi ABOUT ME." tliug about the kitchen while Drucilla sat on the back porch paring the pota toes. "Going to tho circus':" Jim asked cheerfully. "It's about time we got ready." "1 can't." Drucilla's face turned grave at the suggestion of disobedience to the paternal command. "Look here," said Jim, calmly drop ping down upon the lowest step, "li s about time that something was done to show your pa that you've got some rights. 1 bet old man Festis won't lake you to the circus when you marry him." t "Who said she was goiu' to marry i llatrk Festis?" demanded Mrs. Ches ney, coming to the door. "Everybody—and Mr. Chesney." was the scornful answer. "She's not going to marry a man old enough to be her grandfather even if j he's got a farm as big as this whole county," declared Martha. "Just what I say," declared Jiui amiably. "We could goto the circus as a sort of honeymoon." Drucie clasped her hands. Long ago she had confessed her love for Jim even while she told him that tier fa ther would never give hi•• jSent. This suggestion of elop ~-nt fairly took her breath away. A circus her first circus and a marriage on the same day! It seemed too wonderful to be true, yet Jim was talking about it as calmly as though l>eing married were an everyday affair. "Why not?" he demanded. "It'll take an hour to drive to town. We can see the street parade, go get married aud see the afternoon show. Old Martha will come over from the poor fu-m to look after the house." In the eud it was even as he had planned. Silas Chesney came home to = And the house deserted save for old Martha sitting on the porch. She was very deaf, and only by dint of much j shouting did lie learn that his folks had gone off with Peters to the circus. ; He made a solitary meal and then i went out on the front stoop to await the return of the runaways. Jim had insisted upon a supper at a restaurant After the show as a windup to the | celebration, and It was late when they ! drove into the yard. For several hours Silas had been letting his wrath gather strength, and he came storming across the grass as they drove down the side path. "Get outer hew." he cried "I Am'i WUIK none o : ye aoouc me, ye aecetrfm critters. I told ye not togo to the circus. Get outer here." Jim obediently turned the team and headed for the gate-. Silas came run ning after them. "What be ye doin'?" he demanded. "You're runnln' away with my team." "We'll get out and walk then," said Jim promptly, jumping to the ground. "Come, Oracle." The girl sprang down aud he caught her in his arms, implanting a sounding kiss upon her lips before he released her. Then he helped Mrs. Chesney out and the trio started for the gate. "What are you doin* now?" howleaC Silas. Jim turned with well affected surprise. "You turned us out and cast us off." he said. "We're going. Tim Newbury offered me his north farm on half shares. I'm going to take his offer. My wife and her mother are going with me." "Your what?" Silas could scarcely believe his ears. "My wife." explained Jim politely. "You'll have to hire a man at full price and hire a girl too. Mrs. Ches ncy wants to come with me. I'll give her the egg money for kc^'s." Silas' jaw dropped. Jim had picked out the most potent argument and with It he had won. Silas moved to ward the house. "You folks will catch your death of colds If you don't come iuside." he growled. "Come along, Marthy." Drucie followed Jim out to the stable to hold the lantern while he un harnessed the horses. "When did Mr. Newbury make you that offer?" she demanded curiously. "Last year," explained Jim. "I guess your pa ain't the only one that can bluff around here—not when I've got you to bluff for." THE AEROPLANE. Keeping It Properly Balanced Is a Dif ficult Art. An aeroplane may be defined as a surface propelled horizontally In such a manner that the resulting pressure of air from beneath prevents its fall ing. A balloon can remain stationary over a given spot iu a calm, but an aeroplane must be kept in motion if It Is to remain gi the air. Such a plane literally runs ou the air like a skater gliding over thin ice. The most fa miliar example of an aeroplane Is the kite of our boyhood days. We all re member how we kept it aloft even in a light breeze by running with it against the wind. Substitute the pull of a propeller for the .ord and the aeropla'.e flying machine Is created. If this were all, the problem of arti ficial flight would have been solved long ngo. There remains the supremely difficult art of balancing the plane so that It vViil skate ou an even keel. Even birds find It hard to maintain this stability. In the constant effort to steady himself a hawk sways from side to side as be soars. Hko an acro bat ou a tight rope. Occasionally a I*-,1 will catch the wind on the top of his wing, with (he result that he will capsize and fall some distance be fore he can recover himself. If the living aeroplanes of nature find the feat of balancing so difficult. Is it auy wonder that men have been killed in endeavoring to discover their secret? If you have ever#sailed a canoe you will readily understand what tills task of balancing an aeroplane really means. As the pressure of the wind on your sail heels your canoe over you must climb out on the outrigger far enough for your weight to counterbalance the wind pressure, so that you will not be upset. The physicist sclent ilk-ally ex plains your achievement by staling that you have succeeded in keeping the center of air pressure and the center of gravity on the same straight line. In a canoe the feat is comparatively easy; in an aeroplane it demands con stant and linshlike shifting of the body, because the sudden slight varia tions of the wind must be Immediately opposed. V aldemar Kaempffest in Cosmopolitan. MAGIC OF THE BASS. Memories of the Battle That Linger With the Angler. "The Indians call It "Me-da Mon-nuh she-can.' which translated means mag ic bass. He is said to be much like other black bass in appearance. Rut his peculiar attributes are these: "lie must be caught by casting, with a surface halt, so that you can see him rise to It. He may be taken In running water where the clear current foams over mossy bowlders and through gur gling, sunlit shallow? or In the silent pools where the forest hangs darkly over the stream. He may be taken at some still lake' 4 grassy marge, where the water lilies build him a green and white and golden canopy, or In the open places when the west wind's magic turns the glassy surface Into silver. "But wherever you find him you will see that nature rules supreme. And whether in brawling stream or quiet pool. In some peaceful lilied bay or just | beneath the rippled broad expanse, ; where the wild beauty of the spot i makes your heart beat faster, here i may you find the magic bass. "And this is his magic: That when ! you have fought him inch by inch and have looked upon him as he lay ex hausted in your landing net you are his forever. For wherever you go and whatever you do there will come to you ever and often a dream of his first leap into the air, of the tugging line and of his body at your feet, and indis tinct behind It nil lie the sparkling wa ter and the forest and the blue sky. "In the dead of winter you will of a sudden hear the soft splash of the bass rising to your fly, you will fee! the sud den tautness of the line, and the snow outside your window will melt Into a summer landscape. When you are busiest there will come to you the song of the reel and the smell of pine and flr and balsam. That Is the magic of the Me-da Mon-nub-she-gan."—Out? Jng Magazine. Continuous Cooking. "New York Is a place of continuous cooking," said the woman from the west. "Walk along any street at any time and you will get a whiff of coffee and broiling meat There doesn't seem to be any set time for meals. Judging by the sm«ll, breakfast Is a movable feast that takes place any time between 0 o'clock and noon."— New York Post. Trescott's Graduation. By JAMES CHAMBERS. Copyrighted, ISKJ7. t»y C. H. SutnlJTe. 0 ' in Trescott clipped the advertisement from the paper uiul tucked It tnto his pocketbook. He had about made up his mind togo to one of the fashion able resorts for his month's vacation, but this appealing advertisement de cided hiin. It was Just a few lines of small type, but every sentence painted alluringly the delights of a summer on a farm and announced that Elm farm was to be rented for the mouth of August at an extremely reasonable rate, j Trescott wrote to "E. Marsden, ' agent," and the answer decided him. j lie could have a far better time than ; would be his If cooped up in some j stuffy room at an expensive hotel, and I the thought of a whole house to him self for an entire month was attrac ; tlve after having occupied the tiny bedroom and parlor of a bachelor apartment for eleven months. So Marsden engaged to have the farm house put ill proper order by the first Saturday In August. It was with pleasurable anticipation thatTrescottclimbcHl Into the buekboard | that met him ut the station. The farm was a comfortable looking place, some fifteen acres in extent, and bordering a small lake. The house, a two story frame, was painted, and beds of flow ers made the front yard gorgeous. Inside it was the pink of cleanliness, but the place struck a chill to his xouJL The arrangement of tlie furniture re minded him of the cheap boarding house iu which ho bad si>ent his first : years 1 a the city, and try as he would he could not alter the gaunt arrange ment of the place. He had sent some money to the agent with the request that some simple groceries be put In, and he had no trouble In getting his supper, but the moment the meal was "YOt* CAN HKLp!" SHI'. CONCEDED, WITH A SMILE. over and the dishes washed he went ! out of doors to smoke his pipe. He did not enter the place again until It was time to seek the chill bedroom. It was raining the next morning, and he spent a most miserable day roaming about the dreary rooms and wishing for the Sunday papers. He had a couple of books in his satchel, but be could not make himself com fortable enough to read, and.after vainly seeking to change the furniture about into some semblance of com fort, he gave it up aud dragged an old rocker out to the barn Here, ut least, he felt less oppressed by the dreariness of it all. He spent a fairly comfortable after noon and was just about to rouse him self togo in and prepare supper when the sound of wheels caught his ear. followed in .t moment by the jaugle of the doorbell. He raced across the yard and through the house to present himself at the door. A young girl stood ~ the porch, while an elderly woman sat In the covered buggy. "Good afternoon," was her brisk greeting. "Is Mrs. Trescott at home?" There isn't any Mrs. Trescott," be said, with a laugh, "unless you mean my mother She Is In England Just now." "I am Miss Marsden," she explained. "I drove out to get acquainted and see bow you liked the place. 1 tup posed. of course, that there was a fam ily." , "There Isn't anv famJlv." he said "and l don't like the place. Of all the dismal places 1 was ever In this is the worst. I was going ir to tell your brother so in the morning. 'Comfort able aud homelike.' " he quoted from the advertisement. "And he promised to liave it all fixed up." "There wis a woman here all day Friday," the girl said. "Didn't she clean up properly?" "She cleaned up," he conceded, "but I can't make the place look homelike. I shiver every time I look at it. I'm going to change the name and call it Lemon farm Instead." "I guess It's not as bad as that," she said, with a rippling laugh. "I thought there would be a woman In the family to make things look 'homey.' so I did aot come myself. May we come in?" He stood aside in silent Invitation. He followed them into the bouse, and bis admiration for the personality of the brisk young woman increased as she rapidly moved from room to room, Jiving the touch here and there that was needed to transform the apart ments. "You're a magician," he declared as, with a final pat to the sofa pillows, •he transformed the parlor and moved Into the dining room. "Now it looks like a place to be lived In." "It's the purely feminine touch that with a little laugh 'lf I hart' Known that you were alone, I should have been out yesterday morning before you arrived." "I'm glad you waited," he »aid sim ply. "Won't you and your mother stay to supperV I can cook if I <m;i't keep house. I will put the horse up and you can telephone your brother." "I am 'E. Marsdfto,' " she explained. "I have no brother. When father died I decided to keep up the busi aess. Eva Marsden did not look very well, and, besides, people do not like to do busi ! uess witli a woman. So, between the simple initial and a typewriter, I man age to get along." i "You should come to tmvn," he ad vised, "and call yourself a 'home maker.' It ought to be worth a lot of ! money." "That might be profitable In winter," 1 she agreed. "Perhaps I will try it." I "But In the meantime, supper," he insisted. "I'll look after the horse. There are a couple of magazines you might cure to look at while I am gone. I shall no.: be long." i He dashed out to get the horse nnder cover. He returned the back way and surprised the girl bustling about the kitchen. "You can help," she conceded, with a smile, "but I just know that you can't make biscuit." "But I can," he insisted. "I'll show you some-day. Meantime I'll make the ' coffee and put the things oa the table." "Tile table is all set," she cried. "You must think mo a very slow house keeper." "It takes me longer than that," he admitted, "though I suppose that prac tice makes perfect, and before long I shall be aHe to do as well as you." "I'll con to tea on your last night here and let you give a graduation ex hibition," she promised, with a laugh, j "Meantime you might get some fresh water." Trescott was sorry to see them drive off, but the girl left behind the fra grant memory of her presence, and the place seemed homelike at last Trescott saw much of the Marsflens in t'"> days that followed, and long before the end of his month he had come to love the light hearted girl who. had faced the world so bravely when necessity demanded. The vacation drew to a close all too soon, and Trescott insisted upon hold ing Eva to her promise to attend his graduation exhibition. Afterward they sat out under tlie trees while Mrs. Marsden drowsed contentedly upon the porch. "llave you been thinking over that honiemaking proposition?" he asked. Eva looked up, with a smile. 1 "I think 1 lack the courage to make a try," she confessed. "It has been very easy here. It is best to leave well enough alone." "Do you think you would care to take on a single contract?" he suggest ed. "You have spoiled me for a bach elor ap»rtment." "I might help you get started in a flat," she agreed. "I usually tako a i vacation after the summer season is over. I could help you buy your things and settle thein." "But I should want you to stay and help use them," be explained—"to be a perpetual homemaker to one lone bachelor. What do you say, dear?" "1' think." she whispered, "that I should like that plan better than the first." "Then seal the contract with a kiss," pleaded Trescott RAISED HIS WAGES. The Way an Employer Got Square With a Faithless Assistant. A story is told in Milwaukee cou eerniug an elderly German who con ducted a good sized manufacturing plant on the south side. He bad an engineer at his factory who had been with him for fifteen years and the old gentleman had implicit confidence in lilm. It was with a profound shock that he discovered finally that the trusted engiueeit was "grafting" most shamefully. The proprietor thought it all over a long while and then sent for the en gineer. When that functionary arriv ed the following dialogue took place: "Ah, John! Good morning. John. How long haf you been vorking by this place?" 9 "Fifteen years." "Aeh, so. And vot are your wages?" "Twenty-live - dollars a week." ' "M-m-m. Veil, after today It viil be $5 a veek more." The engineer thanked his employer profusely and withdrew. A week later '.he old gentleman sent for him again, and the same conversation ensued, ending with another $5 a week raise. 1 The third Saturday he sent for the engineer again, and after the same questions and answers he raised his salary another $5 a week. On the fourth Saturday the engineer was again summoned before the boss. "How long have you been vorking here, John?" asked the proprietor. "Fifteen years," replied the engineer, who by this time had grown to expect the weekly question and salary raise as a regular thing. "And how much vages are you get ting?" "Forty dollars a week." " Veh, so? Yell, you are fired." ' Fired!" exclaimed the engineer, al most fainting. "Why, you have been raising my salary ?."> at a clip for the last three weeks." "Sure I have," roared the Teutonic boss, all his indignation flaring out at once. "Ami, the reason that 1 did it vas that it shall make it harder for you for vhen I tire you, you loafer!"— Milwaukee Wisconsin. The Savage and the Bird Cage. A gentleman who went out with Stanley to Africa took with him a numlier of bird ca:;es iu which he hop ed to bring back some specimens of the rarer birds of the interior. Owing to the death of his carriers he was obliged to throw away the bird cages, with a numlier of other articles These were seized by the natives In great glee, though they did not know what to do with them, but they eventually decided that the small circular cages were a kind of headgear, and, knock- [ Ing off the bottom, the chiefs strutted ! about in them with evident pride. One chief, thinking himself more wise than the other?; and having seen the white men eat at table out of dishes, thought they were receptacles for food and took his meals from one, ceremoniooa ly opening and shutting the door be tween each mouthful. BUYIIBG A SAW. Find Out the Kind You Want Before You Goto Purchase. When fie man in the golf cap start ed downstairs his wife Ban lo the door and called lilm back. "Ilarry," she-said, "1 want you to go into a hardware store today and get a saw. Don't forget it. please. We need one badly." Being an accommodating person, the inan in the cap said he would not forget It. He chose the luncheon hour as the most opportune time for making his simple purchase-. He was in a good humor, and he smiled blandly when he went bustling into the store and said: "I want a s«w, please." "What kind ot a saw?" asked the clerk. "Why," said the prospective pur chaser, "1 don't know; just a saw. Any kind will Jo. I presume." The clerk sighed. "If you only knew what you want to use it for, I could advise- you," he suggested. "What I want to use it for?" echoed the mpj in the golf cap. "Why, I want to saw, of course—that Is, my _ folks do." "Saw what?" asked the clerk. "I don't know." attained the non plused shopper. The clerk led the way to the rear of the store. "I w'll show you a few of the different varieties of saws we have on hand." he snid. "Observation and explanation of their uses and priefs,,' may assist you In making a decision. Here Is a metal saw. It is made of highly tempered steel and will saw Iron, copper, lead and all manner of metals. Is that the kind you want?" The man in the golf cap was sorely perplexed. "Xo," he said. "I don't think so. We have no metals at our house to work on that I know of." "Perhaps you would like a meat saw?" suggested the clerk. "But you are not a butcher." "Heaven be praised, no!" said the man who wanted a saw. "Here is a regular kitchen saw for general utility purposes. It will cost you only 50 cents. How does that strike you? Xo? Then here Is thq cabinetmaker's saw. Then I have here the plumbers' saws, the fine deli cate saws used by all manner of artifi cers and the ordinary wood saws, which will cost you anywhere from 50 cents to $4. In that back room we have still other varieties of saws—the two man ten foot saws, bun/ saws and circular saws. If you want to pay a big price you had better take one <>.' the circular saws. I'll give you a good one for SSOO. Would you like to see them?" The man in the golf cap looked about him wouderingly. "Xo, thank you," he said. "1 guess I won't take any till I find out just what kind I want." "I regret: being unable to make a sale," said the clerk affably, "but I really think that the best plan."—Cin cinnati Enquirer. Richter's Conducting. Countless are the stories told of the genially of l>r. Ilaus Hichter. Once while rehearsing a Mozart symphony in which the first violins had a nunlher of delicate trills and turns to perform these were played too heavily for Itieh ter, who said: "Please, gentlemen, pianissimo! Queeti Mab. not suffra gettes." Again when on one occasion Hichter was not thoroughly satisfied with the orchestral rendering of a scene from "Tristan und Isolde" he stopped lie rehearsal and asked for more diguity in the playing, adding that Isolde was the daughter of a king, not of a cook. On another occasion while rehearsing Tschaikowsky's "Ro meo and Juliet" music the violoncellos have a very passionate melody to play. Hichter was by no means satisfied that then« .'dful warmth of expression had been obtained. "Gentlemen. gen tlcmen." said lie. "y u all play like married men. not like lovers "—London Tit-Bits. I Girjs' Names. In the eighteenth century ;K s were christened Sophia and < a .iirtv a the early nineteenth Emma and .lane, a little Hater Laura and Clara. Then came n crop of Dorothys and Marjo-. ries, who are now all calling their own babies tin a reaction against the "quaint") Elizabeth. The names of men suffer no such tmphatie fashions, and yet it is a flleasure to note that" there arc certainly no more young men called Alf and Gns. as were the young men who walked with the crin oline In the days of l,eeeh. Good is thev sound of John through all changes.— London Chronicle. First Public Street Cleaner. The Dutch housewives of old Xew York, ever noted for their housekeep ing qualities, created the agitation which resulted In the appointment of the first public street cleaner in Xew York in 1602. He was Laurens Van der Speigle. a baker. His daughter married Rip Van Dam. who afterward became governor of Xew York, an il lustration of the democracy of that day. UETJI IV! A Reliable TIN SHOP Tor all kind of Tin Roofing, Spoutlne and General •Job Work. Stoyea, Heaters. Ran«es, Furnaces. »to. PRICES THE LOWEST! QUALITY TUB BEST! JOHN HIXSOJV NO. IU S. FEONT ST.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers