ihc SDrth ilranch Hcmotval. HABVBT •lOKlißnvProprlet.r NEW SERIES, A weekly berhocratlc peper, devoted to Poll and Science* 4c. Pub- " Tern*—l copy 1 year, (in advance) *2.00 if •at paid within ix months, *2.50 will be charged Nt paper will be DISCONTINUED, until all ar rearages are paid; unless at the option of publisher. ADVERTISING . Hlh)ior VVV | V^' | j I j ass, make thru \ Jour tieo [three \ Lc j one sni tquare wctks ictcks mo'th mo' mo'th , year J 6euare~ Too ~L25 2.25; 2,87; 3,0 * 5,00 * do. 20U 2,50; 3,25! 3,50 i 4 5 j 6,00 1 do 300 * Column 400 4,50 6,50, 8,00; 10,00 15,00 1 Column. ,UU 650 1000 , 12 ',0 0 i 7,00 25 ,00 I do B'oo 7 -°° 14 00 18,00 25,00.35,00 1 do! io;ooil2,0° 17,00 22,00.28,00 40,00 IXBCUIOBS, ADMINISTBAi'URS and AUDI TOR'S NOTICES, of the usual length, $2,50 BftITUARIBS,- exceeding ten lines, each ; RELI OlOUSand LITERARY NOTICES, not of genera latere at, one half tne regular rates. Business Cards of one sqaare, with paper, $5. JOB WORK •fall kinds neatly executed, and at prices to suit he times. All TRANSIENT ADVERT I SEMENTS and JOB NVOKK must be paid for, when ordered. fmuess gatix*. Ha. COOPER, PHYSICIAN A SURGEON • Newton Centre. Luserne County R.R. * W E LITTLE, ATTORNEYS AT LAW Oficeon Tioga street, TunkhanneckPa. lira. M. PIATT, ATTORNEY AT LAW, 0 l\ lice in Stark's Brick Block Tioga St., Tunk hanaeck, Pa. £|je stoe|ler HflitSf, liARRISRUHGe PENNA. The undersigned having lately purchased the •• BUEHLER HOUSE " property, has already com menced uch alterations and improvements as will reader this old and popular House equal, if not supe rior to any Hotel in the City of Ilarnsburg. A*continuance of the public patronage is refpect- Pnlly solicited. qe() } BOLTON . WALL'S HOTEL, LATE AMERICAN HOUSE, TUNKHANNOCK, WYOMING CO., PA. THIS establishment has recently been refitted on fnreisfaed in the latest style Every attention •ill be given to the eomfort and convenience of ihote nftro&iic the HOU®€. T- B. WALL, Owmer and Proprietor*. Tnnkhaanock, September 11, 1861. NORTH BRANCH HOTEL, MESHOPPEN, WYOMING COUNTY, L'A Wu. H. CORTBIGHT, PropT HAVING resumed the proprietorship of the abov Hotel, the undersigned will spare no effort teder the house an agreeable place of sojourn - nil who may favor it with their custom W 7 ' Win. II CORTRIGIIT. lane, 3rd, 1963 gßatt* Ifltel, TOWANDA, T*A. D- B- BART LET, "RA!*A*n HOCSK., ELJIIKA, N. Y. PROPRIETOR. The MEANS HOTEL, u one of the LARGEST aid BEST ARRANGED Houses in the country-It is iited up in the most modern and improved style, mad *o pains are spared to make it a pleasant and tagrweahle stopping-place for all, r 3, ntl, ly. CLARKE, KEENEY, & f 0., UARCrACTCKKSS AKD WHOLVSALK DEAI.RRS 1! LADIES', MISSES' & GENTS' §, ilk auti tSassiram jj&ate AND JOBBERS IN HATS, CAPS, FURS, STRAW GOODS., PARASOLS AND UMBRELLAS. BUFFALO AND FANCY ROBES, ; COUER or LKOBABD STREET, saw w B *. CLARK, I A . % HURT, V . tlMllT. > N EW TAILORING SHOP The Subscriber having had a sixteen years prac experience in cutting and making clothing %ew offers his services in this line to the citisens o ffscueiao* snd vicinity. Thoee wishing to got Fits will And his shop the nee to get them. JeaL, R. EMIT* uKsM-Cmee MF LIMW A Family Sewing Ma chine. with all tkt new irupruTements, ia the beat, and cheapen and most beautiful Sewing Machine in tha world, No Mher Sewing Machine has ao much capacity for a great range of work, including the delieate and ingeatoa* processes of Hemming Braiding, Binding Eabroideribjt, Felling, Tucaing 0 -rding, Gathering, kt,, he, The Branch Offioee am well eapptiad with S : Twist. Thread, Neadlaa, Oil, Ac,, ef the ?• ry west Send for a Pamphlet. THISINGBR MANUFACTFRING COMPART. 458 Broadway, New York, Pnilttdelpiila Ofllee* §tortj. BEHIND THE SCENES. " Four o'clock and no Ellen yet? "\yhat can detain her so? Bhe is usuallv more punctual than the clock itself" It was scarcely a room in which Laura Avery was sitlii.g—rather a m ignificcnt bay window with draperies of embroidered lace. "Poor Ellen," she murmured, "how dif ferently our lots have been ordered in this world. Her parents dead —their wealth irretrievably lost, and she too proud to ac cept a cent that she has not laboriously earned. Oh dear!" and Laura sighed again, just as the cluck's liquid voice chim eu the half hour. "She doesn't come," soliloquized the puzzled little damsel. There's something the matter, Perhaps she is sick—oh, dear, she must be sick, Pll send James to in quire— no, I'll go myself" < B fore the words were out of her lips she was up in her own room adjusting a soft grey shawl over her black silk dress, and tying the string of a quiet little brown velvet bonnet, whose own crimson rose among its trimmings of enameled moss was not unlike the bloom of her own cheek. 44 I don't think it is-going to snow," she pondered, looking ont at the grey, threat ening sky, as she drew on her perfectly fit ting gloves. "At any rate, I shall walk very fast." As she came through the softly carpeted vestibule a seirant approached her. "A note, Miss Laura, it came five tuin utes ago." Ah ! The rose was several shades in the back ground now, as she broke the scented seal, and glanced over the delicate, cream colored sheet, with a bright suppressed smile dimpling the corners of her mouth. Yet the note was a verv simple one afler all: MY DKAR MISS AVERT:—May I prom ise myself the pleasure of accompanying tou to hear the new opera to-night? Un less I receive a message to forbid me, I will call for you at half past seven. Your moit devoted slave and subject. FLORIAN RICHLEY. Laura instinctively slipped the note into her bosom, as if fearful lest the very pic ture on the wall should catch a sight of the elegant chiography, and pursued her wav down the gloomy s'reet, with eyes thai saw the murky atmosphere through the ra-li ant glow of conlenr de rose. Meantime the gray light of October was fading away from the dreary room on one of those streets where decent respectability Strives hand to hand with the grim assailant, w;.nt. Singular out of keeping with the shabby i and poverty-stricken aspect of the apart ment, was a newly finished dress of lus trous purple silk, bright as the dyes of Tyre, that lay folded on the table beside the window in such a manner that you could see the costly trimming—a wide border of purple velvet, edged on either side with a fluting of white point lace. For poor El len Waynall was nothing more important than a hard-working and poorly paid dress maker. She lay on the little white bed in the cor ner, with her flushed face pressed close against the pillow, and her slender figure partially covered by a coarse plaided scar let shawl, while the involuntary contrac tion of her forehead bore witness to the pain she was meekly suffering. As one or two silent tears escaped from her closed eyelids, and crept softly down her cheek, a light step sounded on tin landing outside, and a knock came gently to the panels of the door. " Come in,'' said Ellen, hurriedly dash ing away the tears. "Laura is it possible that this is you, dear?" Yes, it is mysetf'and none other. Nell, I could not imagine why you did not coine and fit that dress as you appointed ; but 1 know the reason now. Nellv, you are sick. Why did you not send for me?" Ellen tried to stnile faintly. "I am not very sick, Laura ; at least, I have not suffered much pain until to night, and the doctor says that if I had only a lit tle wine—no Laura, do not draw your purse," she added, with a slight perceptible sparkle in her eyes and a proud quiver on her lips; "I aui not quite so low yet as '■> aeaept charity. Don't look so hurt and grieved, dearest You know bow sensitive 1 cannot help being on some points. It is only for a litlje while. When lam well enough to take.that dress home and receive the money for it, I then be enabled to purchase whatever I may require." Laura Avery knelt down at her friend's bedside with soft, pleading eyes. "Dear Ellen, yon will not refuse to ac cept a temporary loan from me ?" Ellen shook her head with a grive smile. "I can wait, Laura." Laura looked from the dress to Ellen f with a face painted with perplexity. Sud denly a bright inspiration seemed to strike her. 4< Let me take the dress home, Ellen ?" she asked. "The -wa'k will he just what I need, and I can stop at Dubour's on the way back and order the wine for you You will never be strong unless y<>u cos set yourself up a little. You will let mo, Nell ?" Ellen hesitated a moment. "But, Laura — "No but in the matter, if you please, Nell," laughed Laura, gleefully, beginning to fold the rich dress into a little basket that stood on the table beside it. | "Where is it to gd ?'' "TO SPEAK HIS THOUGHTS IS EVERY FREEMAN'S RIGHT. •* —Thai Jaff'eraan. TUNKHANNOCK, PA., WEDNESDAY, JAN. 16, 1867 * "To Mrs. Ricbley's in River street. — Why Laura, what is the matter?" "Nothing, only I am folding this dress wrong," returned Laura, in a low voice.— It was w. II that Ellen did not sec the scarlet blush that rose to her friends love ly cheek as she stood with her back to the bed, smoothing the luscious breadths of purple silk. Mrs. Ricbley's! Laura was utmost sorry that she had volunteered to go, but it was too late to retract her offer now. "What a selfish little creature I am," she mused. "Poor Neliy needs the mon ey so very much, and cannot go for it her self, and it isn't at all likely that I shall see Florian. I will go—there is au end of it." "Thank you, dear Laura, it is so kind of you," said Ellen fervently, as Miss Avery came to the bed-side with the bask< t on her arm, and black veil drawn closely over the brown velvet bonnet. "She owes me three dollars for this dress, and there are seven dollars on the old account that she has never paid ale." "Ten dollars! I'll collect it, never fear," said-Laura gaily, as she disappeared, while to pour Ellen it seemed as if the sunshine had all died out with the presence of her friend. It was near dusk when Miss Avery, summoning np all her resolution, ascended the brown stone ateps of the Ilichley man sion and rang the bell. "Is Mr. Richly at home?" "What's your businers with Mrs. Rich ley ?" asked the servant, suspiciously scru tinizing the basket that she carried. Lau ift bit her lips. This manner fiom ser vants was an entirely new experience to her, yi t how often must poor Ellen have endur< d it. "I have called to bring home a dress that was finished for her," she said, in a tqne of quiet dignify. "O—ah—yes; well, I s'pose you'd best walk in." The servant conducted her np stairs to a sort of sitting room or boudoir, where Mrs. Richley, a portly dame of about fifty, gorgeously dressed in a crimson silk, was sitting in ber easy chair in front of a glow ing coal fire. Laura was inwardly grate ful that tbe gas had not been lighted, par ticularly when she observed that Mr. Flo rian Richley was fonngingon a velvet "sofa in one of the window recesses. Mrs. Richly looked up as the seivant ushered in the new comer. "Well, young woman, what do you want!" L;ura's cheek tinged at, the tone of coarse inso'en* ein which she was ad dressed, hut she commanded herself to re ply meekly : "I have brought home your dress, Mrs. Richhv." "Where is Miss Wavnall?" "She is ill." "Very well; lay down the dress; it is all right."' But Laura stood her ground valiently. "Miss VV aynall would like the money to-night, mndame—seven dollars on the old account and three for this dress." "It is not eo- venient to-night." ■•Rut, Mrs. Richlev, Miss Waynall is ill and needs the money," persisted Laura. "There, FUrian," said Mrs. Richley, petulantly, addressing the young man in the Turkish dressing gown and elaborate ly arranged hair, "I told you just how it would be." 14 What the deuce is the matter now?'' snappishly asked Florian, for the first time condescending to evince any interest in what was going on. Why, these impertinent dress-making people are always clamoring for money, just when you have drained me of my last cent," "Let 'etn clamor, then, that's my advice," said Florian, without taking the trouble to move his head. "Just give me back that ten dollar bill, Florian," urged his mother. "You can't want it to night." "But I do want it, it happens," said Flo rian, coolly. "Yon are going to fritter it away in som<' of those gambling houses, to drink yourself stupid again," frette I Mrs. Riehley. It's too bad, getting my money away from me ju.-t|to indulge in those horrible habits.— VYhv don't you earn money for yourself?" "Easy, ma, east," said the dutiful son, lazily dragging hims< If to a sitting posture. 'Don't loose your temper, for it isn't worth while. dollar bill is going to help make my fortune. It shall take the lovely Laura to the opera to-night." "Nonsense this fine scheme will flash in P'e pan just like all the rest of your cas tles in the nir. She won't bave you. "Ob, yes she will, my incredulous mam ma, wait and see. I shall bring her to the point pretty soon. Then I'll pay you back the money with interest out of my lady's bag of shiners." "And will ycu leave off your gambling habits ? Oh, Florian, they will be the rum of you yet.". "Perhaps, perhaps not," returned the young man iosob ntly. "That will be very much as I please " Both the mother and her son had entire ly forgotten the presence of the young girl who was standing in the dusky shadows near the door, until this moment, when Mrs. Richly, turning sharply around, saw her. "What arc you waiting for," she asked irritably. "I have already told yon that it was not convenient to pay the money to night—why don't you go about your busi ' oess V I Jler cheeks were flushed even beneath their artificial bloom of rouge, and her chill grey eyes sparkled with rising anger, as Laura Avery composedly advanced forward She took one of tlie*w*x tapers from the china shell and lighted the gas with a steady flash of rich rings filled Mrs. Richley with astonishment. "I am sorry that you cannot pay your jnst debts, madam," said Laura, quietly looking the amaz.d mother and son in the face ; "but I am not sorry for any occur rence that has had the effect of opening my eves to the true character of Florian Richiey. I will take the ten dollars, sir, to mv sick friend, as you will find it entirely unnecessary to go to the expanse of taking Miss Lanm Av. ry to the opera to-night." Florian's handsome cheek had grown pale—his knees quivered beneath him as lie mechanically took the bill from bis pock et took and placed it in the hand of the im perative beauty, while Mrs. Richley sank back aghast into the cushioned arm chair Florian made one desperate effort to re trieve his lost fortune, even in the moment of sure defeat and discomfiture. "I am very sorrv —awkward mistake— hope you will afford me an explanation," he stammered. "I require no explanation, sir." was Lau ta's cold reply, as she withdrew from the apartment, haughtily and unapproachable as a statue of ice. She hurried homeward through the twi light streets, with a burning cheek and beating heart, and it was nearly dark when once more she entered Miss Waynall's room lighted only by the faint glow of a low fin-. "Back so soon, Laura ?" asked Ellen, somewhat surprised. . "Here is the money,Nelly,and the wine," she said, thankful that the dim light could not betray her tell-tale features, "And now vou must get well as fast as you can." "Oh, Laura, lam so much obliged to you," said Ellen, earnestly. Laura stooped to kiss her friend's pale cheek .inwardly reflecting how much slu- bad to thank fr Ellen's indisposition. But she never told E'len of the discovery she had unwillingly made, while fulfilling the gentle missio:. of friendship, and no one ever knew the precise manner in which the contemplated uiaich between Llorian liichley and Laura Avery was broken off. There are some things that bring their own ri ward in this world—and the one | act of kindness had saved Laura from un- i consciously taking the step that would have j precipitated her into a lifetime of misery, j ADVICE FOR THE YOUNG. Seldom have I seen any advice for the young t* at gave me so much satisfaction as the following. I cannot tell my young | readers who wrote it, but .s it is good, I'■ hope they will read it carefully and tryto remember all it says to them. There it. some tilings you must not <lo if you wish to be true scholars. You must not spend your leisure time in idle conduct. You must not waste the long ami fiuitful evening in noisy, vulgar plays in the streets, with the profane, the disso lute, the reckless, calling to stiangers, and annoying peaceful citizens. You must not be ashamed to be polite. A coarse, gross, rude address never ex presses a delicate, thoughtful, well regula ted mind. You must not be afraid to do right. Boys are often tempted to show I their courage ry ridiculing merit. They, sometimes think it in. an to be afraid of j offending their parents, or their teacher j or God himself. Re in em her that the true i spirit consists in following the dictates of i a noble nature ; and he is the r< al coward who can be shamed out of his principles. Never make light of a serious subject, nor trifle with the misfortunes of a feliow creature. Never take pleasure in inflict ing pain. You must not find your best pleasures away from your own homes. I am al ways afraid of a boy who begins to be un easy at home. When the presence of! your parents and sisters put a restraint upon you, and you feel shy of them, be sure that all i not right. An uncorruptcd ami unperverted child is no where so happy as at home. Never i suffer yourself to lose, never allow any body to your bosom the fond and kindly affections . that grow up and shed j their odors around the fatndy fireside. You must not imagine that you and ' your teacher hare different interests He labors for you, he lives for you. His in terest is for your welfare. His honor is in your progress his happiness is in your I highest good. If you could disturb his ! plans and hinder his success, you would triumph in your own defeat.. You must not tempt others to do wrong. I It is enough to lose advantage for one's self; to fail of the great ends of education. To be the occasion of misleading. and in juring another—to set about corrupting an innocent mind—to litre a guileless, con fiding child from the path of purity—to estrange an affectionate nature from the love of truth and the sacred endearments of home, is a deep, deep guilt, and ama ligtiant influence. To all of you let me say, be punctual. It a scholar is late the whole school is dis turbed; his own progress is interrupted; the oider of the day is interfered with ; and what is worst of all, a habit of punctu ality is not formed—a habit essential to the success and happiness ot life. "A little too la.-," is a motto to be in scribed upon the tomb>tone of half of the t nfortunate in the business of this world, and of more than half who fail of fiif hap- 1 piness of tbe future. Take pains to comply exactly with tjre regulations of the school. Confide in the teacher, respect the opinion he has delib erately formed ; suffer him to rule within the sphere of his duty. Be not in haste to advance. Cultivate carefully the ground you go over; be sure you obtain distinct, char ideas, and dwell upon a thing until yn master it. 1 hen, and not till thea, you may safely advartce. • Don't whisper. One thoughtless boy, one careless girl, by this one mischievous habit, disturbs the whole school. Learn to study without buzzing; think without mov ing the lips. It is easy after a little practice, Indeed, to be able to be still, is almost a virt tie, it is so necessary to order. Cer tainly it is one of the graces.— Forrester. Jefferson's Profession of Political Faith* Mr. Jefferson's political principles have ever been the standard of faith with the Democracy of the United Stales. No where are they more concisely embodied than in his letter of January 26th, 1799, to Elbridge Gerry. At a time whn lead ers propose to throw principle overboard for expediency, it is well to go hack to the instructions of our old chiefs. He writes : "I do, then, with sincere zeal, wish an inviolable preservation of our present Fed eral Constitution, according to tbe true sense in which it was adopted by the States, that, in which it was advocated by his friends, and not that which its enemies ap prehended, who therefore became its ene mies ; and I am opposed to the raonarch lzing its features by the forms of its admin istration, with a view to conciliate a first transition to a President and SeDate for life, and from that to a hereditary tenure of these offices, and thus to worm out the elec tive principle. lam for preserving to the Stiles the powers not yielded by them to the Union, and to the Legislature of the Union its Constitutional share in the di vision of power; and I am not for trans ferring all the powers of the States to the General Government, and making all those of that government frugal and simple, ap n lying all the possible savings of the pub lic revenue to the discharge of the Nation al debt; and not for a multiplication of offices and salaries merely to make parti sans, and for increasing by every device, the public debt, on the principle of its being a public blessing. lam for reiving, for internal defense, on our militia solely till actual invasion, and for such a naval force only as may protect our coasts and harbors from such depreda tions as uv have experienced ; and not for astandingarmy in time of peace which mav overawe the public-entiment; not for a na vy, which, by its own expenses, and the eternal wais in which it will implicate us, will grind us with public burthens, and sink ns under them, iam for a commerce with all nations, political connection with none; and little or no diplomatic establish ment. And lam not for linking ourselves by new treaties with the quarrels of Europe; enterir g that field of slaughter to preserve their balance, or joining in the confederacy of kings to war against the principles of lib erty. lam for freedom of religion, and against nil manmuvers to bring about a le gal ascendencv of one sect over another; for freedom of the press, and against all violations of the Constitution to silence by force and not by reason, the complaints or criticisms,just or unjust, of our citizens aginst the conduct of their agents. I am for encouraging the progress of science in all its branches; and not for raising a hue and cry against the sacred name of philoso ; phy, for awing the human mind bv stories of raw h.-ad and bloody bones, to distrust its own vision, and to repose implicitly on that of others— to go backwards instead of for wards to look for improvement." gg* Josh Billings replies to some parent "I can't tell you the best way to bring up a boy ; but if I had one that did'nt lie well enough to suit me, I think I would set him in a dry goods 3tore. Probably the best way to bring up a boy in the way be should go, is to travel that way ourselves, once in a while. Still there is much uncertainty. I have seen them brought up as careful as a tap dog, and then go to the devil as soon as they could strike back. And then, again, I have seen them taken out ot gutters, and they would wash up like diamonds. Rais ing boys is a good deal like raising colts,— If you don't get more than one out of ten that is a fast one, you are doing first rate. Irtisn WIT.—A gentleman of the bar in Ireland walking one day with a friend who was extremely precise in pronunciation,the latter hearing a person near bim say "cu rosty," exclaimed ; "How that fellow mur ders the English language !" "It isn't mur der ; it's maiming,"' said the other ; "be has only knocked an M ' out." # fyWhat are you setting that child on that quarto dictionary for ?" said Mrs. D. as her partner arranged his little boy at the breakfast table. "I am," replied he, "fixing the basis of a sound English education. "\es," said she, "but you are beginning at the wrong eud," jfcy The question why printers do not succeed as well as brewers, was thus an swerd: "Because printers work for tho head apd brewers for the stomach,and where twenty men have stomachs but one has brain#," It is a dreadful thing to be old and poor, and have no home ; but thcre'is a deeper depth of human calamity than thi*. It is to hare, in addition, an old age of wasting, wearing sickness; which is often superin duced by that constant depression of mind which attends the consciousness of being alone and friendless and in want. One of the very best means of avoiding an ols age of destitution and bodily suffering is to cultivate while young, all the benevolent and generous feelings of our nature, never by any possibility allowing any opportuni ty pass of befriending a fellow traveler as we are passing along life's journey, for sooner or later the reward will come—the reward of a happy heart and oftentimes a comfortable provision for declining vears. In 1812, a wounded soldier was lying helpless on the plains of G'balinette, a few miles below New Orleans. A youth pass ing that way knelt by his side, inquired as to his wants, conveyed him to a shelter, and remained with bim until be was able to leave for his home in the city. Nearly half a century later, the wounded soldier died but oldJudah Touro never forgot the youth who helped on the battle-field, and left bim $50,000 in money, besides some duties to perform which eventually yielded Mr. Shepherd SIOO,OOO more. While living in New Orleans, about the year 1850, a poor young doctor, with a large family and a small practice, often came into my office. He was always cour teoas, always kind, and always sad ; and who could be otherwise when anxiety for to-morrow's bread for wife and children is always pressing on the heart ? But there came a letter one day, with the English post mark, making inquiries for a certain young American d ictor, who had befriend ed an English gentleman during a long and dangerous attack of sickness in New Or leans a number of years before. This grateful gentleman had died and left our poor young doctor a e fate. Ten years ago and less, there lived in the city of New York a clergyman whose name and memory are sacred to thousands of graceful, loving revering hearts. He has not been dead long ; be will never die out of the holy affections of the people be fore whom he came in and went out so ma ny y eats. Among his people there was one man, and he was of largie wealth, who seemed to make it special business, as it was bis highest happiness, to see that his revered pastor wanted nothing. It did not spring up in May, and die long before De cember came, but through 4"eeks and months and long years it was always the same; incessant, perenial, gushing up al ways like a never failing sprir.g. The pas tor died : his loving watcher, bv no fault of his own, failed lor almost millions ; at-v recovery was absolutely hopeless. Tlfc grief that pressed him was the loss of abili ty to help the helpless. Men looked on and wondered, and began to question if Providence would let such a man come to want in his gray hairs. A men of very great wealth said; "He must not suffer who cared so well and so faithfully and long for mv minister. lie is just the man I want to attend to my estates, and shall have all he asks for as compensation for his j services." —-Hall's Journal of Health. VOL. 6 NO. 23, KINDNESS REWARDED. A goodmany years ago it was morel In the Legislature of a FFestem State to he stow the name of Cass on a new county A whi<;, meaning to be sarcastic, rose and moved as an amendment that the first let ter of the proposed name be struck ont! The laugh was or. his side hugelv, until a Democrat retorted that he might not have any objection, but that it was very un usual for a member to rise and propose that a countv in the State should be named after himself! And then the other side had the laugh. Coleridge was acknowledged to he a bad rider. One (lav, riding through tha street he was accosted by a would be wit; " I say. do you know what happened to Baalam ?" Came the answer quick and sharp: "'The same as did to me—an ass spoke to him!" 4> A ladv was walking in the streets of Par is, recently, when a girl of about thirteen affectionately embiaeed her, saving— "o, my dear aunt!" The lady told the girl she was mistaken, when the latter disappeared in confusion along with the lady's porte-monie, as she af terwards discovered. I think I hnve seen you before, sir;- are you not Owen Smith ?" "Oh, yes ; I'm owin' Smith, and owin' Jones, and owin'Brown, and owin' eveir body." A quack doctor advertises to this effect: "Consumptives, cough while you can, for after having taken one bottle of my tincture you can't." The crew of the whale ship Antelope brings home a gold watch and silver spoons belonging to Sir John Franklin, and word as to where the remains of the explorer are buried. "Thai's very singular, sir," said a young lady to a gentleman who had kissed ber. "Oh, well, my dear Miss, I will soon make it plural."
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers