TBE FULTON COUNTY NEWS, McCONNELLSBURG, PA. j-he best show It the unconscious, jihlbitlon given by crowd or people, TENDER SENSITIVE SKINS Quickly Soothed by Cutlcura. Noltv ing Better. Trial Free. Especially when preceded by a hot h-ih with Cutlcura Roan Miiv (nvtlnr thfnim thao fra vt-nnt tut i o r . . v HBinui ouM i jffamy emollients may do for the 1. 1 aioln halt nn4 j j.. a llllli DV.a'K auu IiailUU HUU UO 11 i t-i.. (rAHtiH.iu . .. flUicRi. rucviivcijf una economically, Alan tor the toilet hath anH nun Sample each free by mall with Book. Address postcard, Cutlcura, Dopt. XY. Oil A . . BOIiuu. duiu eerywnere. AQy, Speaking of grlt-f, the cold-fried rgg undoubtedly la the saddest thing. Imoortnnt to Mothers Eiamine carefully every bottle of CA9T0RIA, a safe and lure remedy lot Infants and children, and see that It glrnature of &x&fflj&U Id Use Tor Over 30 Years. Children Crj for Fletcher's Cautoria A barber's Idea of an unenterprising citizen Is one who shaves himself. One Way to Lengthen Life tut Id Ufa, when the organs beg-In to weaken, th bard-worklng kidneys oftea lire out first. Kalllng eyesight, stiff, achy joints, rneumatlo pains, lams back aud distressing urlnatlun are often due only to rak kidneys. Prevention Is the beat cure and Ht mkl'lle ag-eany sign of kidney weak tms should have prompt atleniloo. Dnan's KhlDrr Pills have made life more Comfort ible for thousands of old folk. Jt la the teat rocouimeuded ipecial kidney remedy. A Pennsylvania Case ftT Tift Robert O. Miller. 31i Ferry St., Dan ville, j'u., says: "The pa'na In my back were terrible tnd at times I could hardly move. There was a lament- and noronesa across my loins and sometimes the k I d ney sccretlcni w r retarded, thf-n again their pti8naon were too frequent. The least rold innde my con dition worn. Vothlna helped me until I used Donn'a Kldnc-y Pills and they rid me of all the ailments." Cat Doan'e at Aa Store, BOe a Box DOAN'S WJ? fOSTER-MTLBURJ, CO, BUFFALO. ft Y. Constipation Vanishes Forever Prompt Relief Permanent Cure CARTER'S LITTLE LIVER PILLS never fail Purely vegeta m act surely CARTER'S! Kenny on :ne liver. Ston after ITTLE IVER t-nner dis PILLS. hes-cure digestion. improve the complexion, brighten the eyes, SMALL PILL, SMALL DOSE, SMALL PRICE. Genuine must bear Signature pJtairrnUliUfl Glenn's Sulphur Soap No other toilet soap li as effi cient in clearing the com plexion of blemishes. The sulphur Purifies (All DroiilHi.)! Contains 80 Pure Sulphur. INVl Hilr I Whtttr Dye, Start sr love, 6S, r-LADIES!! USE GILBERTS JEWEL TALCUM POWDER !' Tbe Talcum of Quality, for reducd j t"ple; Perfume rich, lasting, and el- iinw; rowder ol velvety oneness, la Clau Jare-1 Sc. ana 1 5c Bold oy all dealers L GILBERT BROS, A CO. BALTIMORE, MD. nnmmtinauuaiiuuiwiwuwwuiumiuvwtiiMMn $3 Pair of aiAMS Free '0 int.nj . I- . , n - . j """ "ur una quicKty, wo ouer to 'Lady in Ec, Town a pair of beau "I Ecru Marquisette Window Curtaina, "olutelv fr.. ln-. I (..II ?"B''y, to THE HACER COMPANY, I this out -it mav not annrar auain. feaV KILLER Ksf tSS X Ilea. hel, elesaD, or tuamenlsai, ootiTtiint. ohetap. Lasts all aaason. Mdo( nitUk,), oantipillorUp n will sot toll or Ifllari stnytblBg QaantntMil ttrMttva, All daalora orlMnt QMI-M.IH O. Kali At... Breoklra, . f pAReltRS HAIR BALSAM A tallvl arTratloa of mrli Ui toarsullrauaudruO. Far Raul-Aria sTaL aiitJ & Bm utr to Grav or FositMl Hair, 4Wo. sand i w at Dmifyista. AT IM I I Four Universal Characteristics Br REV. B. B. SUTO-IFF E Amui SvperiaUadrat ct Mta, Moody BibU 2 laMilula of Chkuo TF.XT For we must needs die, and are oa water split on the around, which cannot be gathered up again; neither doth Ood respect any person: yet doth ha de vise menns, that his hnnlnhed be not ex pelled from him.-II Sunt. 14:14. This Is part of a woman's plea to King David to have Absalom reHtored after he had been driv en out for his crime against his brother. It Bpeaks of four universal characteristics found In every sinner. I. A universal end "we must needs die." From the day of birth to old age each step of the way la a step toward the grave. "It Is ap pointed unto man once to die" has been true of the whole human family, Various firhemeg and vari ous ways have been tried to dlttprove this but the grave continues to receive Its due. However strong and however great, one universal end awaits us for "we must needs Ulo." 2. A universal condition "we are as tbe water spilt on the ground which cannot be gathered up." We were Innocent when wo were born, but alas, how quickly the Innocence was destroyed. We' were helpless to re tain It. A few days in the forgotten time of our early childhood and then It was aB water spilled out. Tho fresh Innocence of the morning quickly died away and we became In deed what we are In nature, tinners. We could not avoid the spilling out as water and we were helpless to gather it up again. Once lost It was lost for good and try as we might to for get and try as we might to turn over the new leaf and begin again, each at tempt just tended to show us the helplessness of all effort. All have become guilty, and all are helpless to get rid of that guilt We are as water spilt which cannot be gathered up again. 3, A universal standing "neither doth . God respect any person, God Judges all alike In respect of sin. One may be great In this world and another may be unheard of, but before God they stand on the same platform as sinners. One might be learned and another ignorant but It Is In respect to sin that they come before the Lord. One may be a good man and tell the Lord about his fast ing and his praying without any rec ognition of his sinfulness, and he has less favor with God than the poor publican who merely standB and pleads for mercy. They are both sin ners there, for there Is no respect of persons with him. This would make tbe case of sinners to bo hopeless were It not for the fact that that which is Impossible to man Is possi ble to God. 4. A universal opportunity "He doth devise means that his banished be not expelled '.rom him." When man sinned and automatically put himself away from God, the God he had sinned against Immediately set about devising means to have man brought back to him. "God commend ed his love towards us In that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us." It was God who began tho work of redemption, not man. The first movement was from God's side. He It was who provided the precious blood of the Lamb of God, the only means for putting away sin. for without the shedding of blood there Is no remission," as the Bible declares from cover to cover. Not only must the sin bo put away, but the sinner must be cleansed, and here again, wa remember the word that "the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." The Justice and the holiness of God are upheld and vin dicated by the blood and a way made open for the sinner, the banished one, to be brought back to God. The blood meets every objection of the law and every objection of the devil and ad mits the one who was banished back to the Father's house. The Lord him self does this that "His banished may be with him." "Go so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever belleveth on him might not perish but have everlasting life.' The redeemed sinner can now sing of him who ' loved and gavo hlm- Belf for me." God has done all he can to have the banished one back with Mm and all that remains Is for man to accept his terms and come to him without fear. The work Is all finished and finished in such a way that God can be Just and yet the Justifler of him that be lieves In Jesus. And Christ says: "Him that cometh unto me I will In no wise cast out." Trust in God, All virtue consists In having a will ing heart. God will lead you as If by the hand, If only you do not doubt, and are filled with love for him rather than fear for yourself. Fenelon. The Soul on Top. Someone has said that education Is learning to live with the Boul on top. Measured by this standard, per haps there are Cewer educated people in the world than we are accustomed to think. Men who live with the soul on top are few. Most of us are satis- fled to live with our own desires up permost, and are never better pleased han when our own comforts have been gratified. It Is a great lesBon to learn in life to put the soul on top and to give the spiritual In our lives the place of pre-eminence and power. Exchange. MOTIONAL SUWSOIOOi Lesson (ny )'. O. Sl-.LLKlta. Artlnir lllreclnr o Htinilay School Courea, The Moody tflble jiiBiuute ui iiiicaijo.) LESSON FOR AUGUST 1 QUEEN OF 8HEBA VISIT8 SOLO MON. UC880N TEXT-I Kings 10:1-10, U. aof.DKN TICXT-Wlsdom Is better than rubles. J'rov. 8:11. The visit of this wealthy queen from the region of southern Arabia has always appealed to the imagina tions of men. Solomon's kingdom was at the apex of Its glory. There were no wars, Israel's borders were extended and the temple and those other wonderful buildings had all been completed. The chief value of this lesson is not in Solomon's wisdom nor In what this queen saw and heard, but rather It Is In what has, is being, and will be done by Christ, of whom Solomon Is a type and who seized upon all of this glory to teach us a great lesson (see Matt. 6:28-34). Caesar's famous phrase, slightly altered. Is In this connection quite applicable "I came, I saw, I (was) conquered." I. "Hard Questions," vv. 1-3. Solo mon is here a great type of Christ: (a) His greatness could not be hid (Mark 7:24). Solomon's fame filled the known world (I Kings, 4:34). The fume of Solomon's wisdom, philosophy, proverbs, poems and knowledge of God (v. 1) drew to his court this queen, and we must recall that it was proba bly a 1,500-mile toilsome camel-back Journey for her to come to his court. (b) She brought a "very great store (v. 10) of gifts, which, according to oriental custom, she presented to Sol onion. Our best -gift to our King Is ourselves (2 Cor. 8:6). (c) She came to learn of "the name of the Lord who had done so much for Solomon and his people; to learn wisdom for the guidance of herself and her peo ple. We come to a King who pos sesses all wisdom (Matt. 12.42). Solo mon had a wonderful missionary op portunity. God Is today sending heart hungry people to this land from the most remote parts of the earth. Are we using our privilege to point them to the true God and to Jesus, his son? This queen did not believe what she had heard (v. 7) and resolved to find out for herself. In this she Is a rebuke to those more favorably situated who though constantly beholding the work of God In human hearts and lives, still say, "I do not believe." The queen of Sheba will rl.e up In Judgment against nil who refuse to "conio and see" (John 1:39, 45-11: Matt. 12:42). (d) This visit is a prophecy of that duy when the kings of Sheba and Bfoa win come wun tneir gifts for the greater son of David (Psalm 72:10, 15; Isa. 60:6-9). The wisdom which our king bestows Is eternal life, "to know him" (Prov. 2:2-6; John 17:3) (e) Our king Is ready to answer "hard questions" provided they are honest and sincere (John 4:29; 7:17). Ho courts Investigation. In exchange for her gifts the queen carried away much treasure (v. 13; Isa. 55:1; Luke 4:18), In like manner her servants were prof ited. Even so men today are profited in basket and store by their associa tions with those who pay court to our lord and king. She also "communed with Solomon "all that was in her heart." Such communion with Christ our king is the privilege of every seek Ing. trustful heart. II. "Had Seen All," vv. 4-7. When she had listened' to Solomon's wisdom and heard the answers to her ques tions, tho solutions to her problems, and had witnessed the wonders of his temple, court and ministers, "there was no more spirit (breath) In her." (Cf. Josh. 6:1.) And similar experi ence came to those three who went to the Mount of Transfiguration with Je sus. Solomon's wisdom Is fulfilled In Christ (Col. 2:3). "The house that he built" Is a type of that temple he is building of living stones (I Peter 2:4, 5; Matt. 16:18). "The meat of his table" is excelled by the food on our king's table, the word of life (Jer. 15:16; Ps. 119:103), his own body (John 6:55). Our king, too, hns his servants (Kph. 2:6; Rev. 3:21). Their "appeal" is not to be compared with the "robe of his righteousness" and our "standing" (2 Cor. 5:21) is more exalted than that of any at Solomon's, or other earthly courts. We are not servants but "friends," yet we are "his ministers" (Rev. 5:10; I Pet. 2:9). Various translations suggest (v. 6), "and his burnt offering which he of fered In the house of the lord." We have one whose offering of himself was far more comprehensive (Heb. 9:11-14; 10:10-14). The queen was compelled to admit that the evidence of her eyes of the glories were even more incredible than the fame which had reached her far off court for said she, "the half has not been told me." All who really come to know Christ make these words their testimony. It was a true report and Bhe nobly ac knowledges the same without envy. Such testimony Is pleasing to our king. III. Praises, vv. 819, 13. (1) By testimony, vv. 8, 9. "Happy are thy men" who listen to such wisdom, who dwell In the midst of Buch achieve ments. One of tho greatest Joys Is to converse with the wise and the good. Our happiness Is in our prlvU lege of standing before Christ and to hear his wisdom (Luke 10:39-42; Prof. 13:20; 3:13, 14); no servant Is de barred (John 12:26). The queen glori fied the source of Solomon's glory, which was all the gift of Jehovah's grace (see 2 Sam. 12:24. 25 R. V. marg., Matt. 3:17; Isa. 42:1). She did not see the oppression of the people, the temptation to luxury and the de cline lu religious life which so soor led to decay after Solomon's death. When our king shall reign he will "d Judgment and Justice." Jehovah stll loves his Israel and will one day make the returning Christ their king (Rom. 11:26). (2) By gifts (vv. 10, 13). (Conducted by the National Woman' Christian Temperance Union.) C08T OF JOHN. BARLEYCORN. The credit side of the account of city with John Barleycorn Is very wide ly advertised by the llquorltes. They endeavor to mako the public believe that there Is no debit side and far too few communities take the trouble to Investigate and discover whut Is paid out of their treasuries to offset the li cense money paid In by the saloons At the Instigation of Governor Brum baugh of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia account with the liquor traffic has been carefully figured up and given to the public. It shows that John Barleycorn costs the city each year more thun 3,000,000; that more than one-half of the expense of the police department of the great city is made necessary by tho liquor traffic; that the per cent ol expense of other departments of the city government, due to alcohol Is, su cides, 75 per cent; home for tho in digent, 60 per cent; guicral hoRpltal, 33 per cent; county prison, 80 per cent; district attorney's ofllce, 80 per cent; clerk of the quarter sessions, 80 per cent; Juvenile court, 10 per ce-it. Such figures certain!; reflect upon the common business sense of the man voters of Philadelphia, especially In view of the statement in the report that "the sum of J3.000.000 is far In excess of the money paid Into the treasury for liquor licenses." A similar problem In civic economy should be presented to the voters o every city which, tolerates the liquor traffic. A NATURAL HANDICAP. The Life Extension institute Is au conization which Is fighting disease through publicity. Its membership includes some of the greatest living scientists and educators. These au thorities have put forth many rad leal statements concerning alcohol They declare that the present antag onistlc attitudo of several European monarchs towards this "deadening drug" Is fully warranted by scientific evidence. "Alcohol," they say, "is a handicap for a nation at war. It Is a handicap for an individual In thestrug gle for existence. This is not the Judgment of scientists alone, nor of weaklings and fnddluts, but of the big-brained, strong-flbered men upon whom has fallen the tremendous .bur den of guiding great nations through the greatest crisis In history.'' EFFECT OF ALCOHOL. Dr. T. Alexander McN'icholl, sur geon In Red Cross hospital. Invest! gated 55,000 school children for tin New York Academy of Medicine. He found 58 per cent below the standard of Intelligence, 17 per cent dullards, 25 per cent deficient, and 16 per cent nearly deficient Fifty-three per cent of the defectives were the children of drinking parents. Only 10 per cent of the children of abstaining parents were dullards. The family history of 3,711 children were traced for three generations. Of the children of ab staining parents and grandparents 4 per cent were dullards, while of the children of abstaining parents and drinking grandparents 78 per cent were dullards. AN UNCOMPROMISING ENEMY. "I am the sworn, etemal and un compromising enemy of the llauot traffic,'- declared Dr. Billy Sunday, re cently in Philadelphia. "Stand by me, be pleaded, "In my fight for your homes, your families, and your de cency. The saloon is doomed: the an tisaloon sentiment already holds the balance of power In the United States In God's good time we are going to sing 'My Country Tis of Thee,' and there wont be a saloon in It. W might as well try to dam Niagara Falls with toothpicks as try to stem the great tide of temperance reform that Is sweeping our country." WORTH WHILE. "I'nder the operation of the present prohibition law wonders have been worked in North Carolina. The im provement can be seen in every city and hamlet, and many men who voted against the present law have since its operation become convinced that It has been more than worth while," says the Charlotte Times in speaking ol the result of prohibition in North Car olina. ROOSEVELT'S OPINION. Colonel Roosevelt says: "There is nothing more absurd than the belief that the closing 'of the' si.loon will cause worklngmen to lose telr Jobs, There are few things more important to our social advancement than the loosening of the grip of the liquor In terests upon the labor movement The saloon always represents economic loss." ALCOHOL QUESTION FIRST. 'If the alcohol question were solved there would still remain other social questions to be Bolved, but it Is also true that as things stand today no other question of social welfare can be taken up with any prospect of se curing efficient results until the alco hol question is solved." Judge Her man Popert, Hamburg, Germany, BAR LIQUOR ADS. One-fourth of nil dally newspaper of the L'nltei States decline liquor advertisements. INCREASED BANK DEPOSITS. Deposits In Kansas state and na tlonal banks exceed the record of a year ago by 113,000,000, according to a statement comnilod Mav 15 bv tho state bank commissioner. The state ment also shows that there are $3,000, 000 more on deposit than ever before In the history of the state. LABORERS WAGES. In wet Missouri common lahnmra receive eight dollars per week and in dry Kansas tbey get fourteen dol lars per week. IN SUCH PAIN WOMAN CRIED Suf f ered Everything Until Re stored to Health by Lydia . Pinkham's Vegeta ble Compound. Florence, So. Dakota. "I used to be very sick every month with bearing- down paini and backache, and bad headache a good deal of the time and very'little appetite. The pains were so bad that I used to sit right down on the floor and cry, be cause it hurt, me so and I could not do any work at those times. An old wo man advised me to try Lydia E. Pink ham's Vegetable Compound and I got a bottle. 1 felt better the next month so I took three more bottles of it and got well so I could work all the time. I hope every woman who suffers like I did will try Lydia E. Pinkhsm's Vegetable Compound." Mrs. P.W.Lanseng, Box 8, Allyn, Wash. Why will women continue to sufferdav in and day out or drag out a sickly, half hearted existence.missing three-fourths of the joy of living, when they can find health in Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound? For thirty years it has been the stand ard remedy for female ills, and has re stored the health of thousands of women who have been -troubled with such ail ments as displacements, inflammation, ulceration, tumors, irregularities, etc If yon want special advice write to lydia E. rinkham Medicine Co. (confi dential) Lynn, Mass. Yonr letter will be opened, read and answered by a woman and held in strict confidence. DROPSY TRGATT0 usually t e qutca I " ,,11,1, j0on removei awellmg and at-ort breath, oltan lives entire relict in 1 1 5 to 2S days Trial treatment sent FREE. Pit. THOMS E. ORKfc.N, Successor to Ur. ' H. H. Greea t Sobs. Boa tasisworia, Oa Johnny Made Good. In instructing a youthful class In mathematics the pretty young teach er turned to Johnny Jones. "Johnny," she remarked, "can you tell me what an average is?" "YeB, ma'am," was the prompt re sponse of Johnny, "an average is what a hen lays ees on." "What?" exclaimed the amazed teacher. "What on earth are you talking about?" "That's rifiht, Miss Mary," was the rejoinder of Johnny. "Most every lesson If. our 'rlthmetic ctarts off -If a hen lays two eggs a day on an average!' "Philadelphia Telegraph, Not Posted. "You studied astronomy at college, did you not, Mr. Saphead?" asked the sweet young thing. "Oh, yes Indeed, and a very fascinat ing study it Is." "Won't you please tell me the name of that bright star over there Just above the spire of the Presbyterian church?" "Let me see," said Saphead. "That's e-r er wait a minute now, I er it must be the fact Is, Mips Peachy, I'm afraid I'm not up un this year's schedule." A Catty Girl. "Algernon 'called on me yesterday afternoon." "Yes; he told me he had some time to kill." New Th ese Are the first and only corn flakes that are "good to eat" without milk, cream or sugar Try some fresh from the package, and at once you get a won derful true corn flavour vastly different from that of the ordinary "com flakes" you may have had. Notice the little pearl-like "puffs" on each flake a characteristic that is distinctive; also that when cream or milk is added they don't mush down, but keep their body and appetizing crispness. There's a Royal Treat in eyery package of New Post Toasties from your grocer. The Thinker. "She hns Ideas of her own." "Indeed! What a disagreeable per son!' Detroit Free Press. Usually Travel Together. "They can't keep the wolf from the door." "Nor the Btork." Boston Evening Transcript. Correct. "In what states does It cost the most to live?' "In the state of matrimony." And That's All. "Van Lusbe says be can take a drink or let It alone." "Well, I've often seen him prove the first half of that statement." H1ANY WAR ZONB HOSPITALS Hive ordered Aiieua Foot-Essa. the antls-ptle powder for use amnnf the convalescent tr.tpa Shaken Into the shoes or dissolved In the loot tut n, Allen's Foot-Ease elves refreshing rest and comfort and provents the feet tjcttinf tired or toot-sore Try It TODAY. Dn't accent any sub stitute. Soid Everywh-re, 2Sc For FREE sam ple, addreia. Allen S. Olmsted. LeRoy. N. Y.Adv Might Not Be In It. "Shall I announce that I am In the race for congress?" "Perhaps it would be nearer the truth to merely state that you are a candidate, my boy." INEXPENSIVE SULPHUR BATHS AT HOME People travel long distances and spend largo sums of money to secure the benefits of sulphur springs and baths because for generations sulphur has been known to be one of nature's most valuable curatives unequalled as a blood purifier. By dissolving 2 to 4 tablespoonfuls of Hancock's Sulphur Compound In a hot bath you get the same effect and your system absorbs the Bulphur through the pores of the skin. For prickly heat and summer skin troubles of Infants and children use a tcaspoonful of the Sulphur Com pound In a bowl of warm water. This makes a refreshing bath and quickly alleviates the pain. Sold by all deal ers, 50c. a bottle. Hancock Liquid Sul phur Co., Baltimore, Md. Adv. Getting Along Nicely. A minister, meeting a parishioner of his who had been quite recently married and about whose domestic happiness terrible stories were rife, saluted him and said: "Well, John," says he, "how's all going on?" "Oh, happily enough!" returns John. "I'm glad to hear It. You know, there were rumors of rows or " "Rows!" says John. "Oh, yes, there are plenty of rows; whenever Bhe sees me she catches the first thing to hand, a dish or anything, and fires It at me. If she hits mo, she's happy; If she doesn't, I am! Oh, we're get ting on fine!" Mother's Little Joke. The young people in their summer flannels and white shoes were out on the tennis court, and the head of the house was In the library trying to read, but the noise was very annoy ing. "What's the -matter out there?" he asked bis wife. "Nothing much," she replied. "It's only a tennis racket." That's All. "What were you doing In that pawn shop, Jim?" "Oh, merely passing away the time." Correct. "Cau you tell me which class of people lives the longest?" "Why, centenarians, I believe." Toasties 11IIBII No bother to' get summer meals with these on hand Vienna Style Sansage and ' Potted Meats Just open and serve. Excellent (or sandwiches. Imltl an Lilly '$ at your gnctr a. Libby, McNeill & Libby, Chlcngc - -IK I la i I RELIABLE PAINTER WANTED We nave a wonderful sew paint which will not peel, bllMer, crack or chalk. Cue la DOa leu per gal ., and covers 1.1 more surface than any other paint. It la the only all-tine paint made brllile-proof and rrack-proof by out secret process, this accounting for lu eitrenn whiteness, durability, permaoent gloss and nnn-fa-llnu eolora. We call It Ztuolln, to "Arnold-lied" Zino, and will eavertlie It wide ly. We want palniera In each town whom we ran certify to bouae-nwneii and architect aa dependable In applying Zlnolin painters who will use Zlnolin when called for, and noisome-thing- else. To be our ertllied Painter will mean bler, iieailier business for you. If too can grl the appointment you should at oore. Write for particulars, tending reference. KEYSTONE VARNISH CO, 70 Ottegs Street, trsoklra. U. T. LADIES-Pair Self-Sharpening- Shears prrpmd f. Aania wantrri: siffmir proposition Itta. triKi blea Co., 1W at. kuria ou, Oouoia, H. 1, A firwTC vir a nrTrr iiett nviuiij,. iiniuw f.,r mm el.iili fnim factory dlri-,-t to wean-rnr ti.,l,--ln pitr,,, Hetereucea requlrra. I. o. Uu j j.-i, 1'bi.aUripliia.rsk I.ADTfTH O. C Wrinkle Remover reoi,Ta yoi wnnalea In two m'nutft. Prlre..- Hnt piHlju.idarr akua. a. a aua.i u tau a. Mm, u. Lm, a W. N. U., BALTIMORE, NO. 31-1915. From the Memories of a Critic. "Good morning, Mr. Scribblepen," said I, as I entered the sanctum sanc torum of the famous author of "Noth ing Worth While," "would you mind telling the American people through my paper, the Dally Blister, how you account for the rather mortifying coiv dltion into which the literature of tbe day seems to have fallen?" "Why, It Is perfectly simple, my dear fellow," replied Mr. Scribblepen affably, correcting the proofs of bis new novel, "The Worst Yet," with bis feet. "Literature has been dead for so long a time that mortification bae set In as a natural sequence to its de cease." John Kendrlck Bangs. Can You Beat It? "That chap Jones believes In get ting his money's worth." "I should say he does! Why, he takes a trip Into town every Sunday so as to get the full value of bis com mutation ticket." Hard Luck. Harduppe Why so despondent? Klubdud Oh, I can't seem to get out of debt. Harduppe Gee! That's nothing. I can't even get In Life. But few men ever grow up men tally. The most ridiculous thing about a man are his ears. mm i
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers